1

00:00:04,046 --> 00:00:06,005

Wow, you guys
look amazing.

2
00:00:06,090 --> 00:00:07,674
Stanley, I thought
you hated Halloween.

3
00:00:07,758 --> 00:00:10,510
He wears it so he can
sleep at his desk.

4
00:00:10,594 --> 00:00:12,428
Who are you?
I'm Carrie Bradshaw

5
00:00:12,513 --> 00:00:13,971
from Sex and the City.

6
00:00:14,056 --> 00:00:15,014
I like your shoes.

7
00:00:15,099 --> 00:00:16,099
Thank you.

8
00:00:16,183 --> 00:00:17,475
Will you help walk me
to the fax machine?

9
00:00:17,559 --> 00:00:18,559
Sure.

10
00:00:18,644 --> 00:00:21,479
I got her. I got her.
I can help you.

11
00:00:21,563 --> 00:00:22,522
You look amazing.

12
00:00:22,606 --> 00:00:24,190
Inappropriate.
Thank you.

13
00:00:24,983 --> 00:00:26,359
Who are you,
Larry King?
14
00:00:26,443 --> 00:00:27,443
Gordon Gekko.

15
00:00:27,945 --> 00:00:30,405
From the insurance
commercials.

16
00:00:30,531 --> 00:00:31,656
Yeah.

17
00:00:35,786 --> 00:00:37,328
Whoa! Awesome.

18
00:00:37,454 --> 00:00:40,540
Let's put
a smile on that face.

19
00:00:42,000 --> 00:00:44,043
Damn it, Creed.

20
00:00:44,128 --> 00:00:46,337
I've been up since 4:00.

21
00:00:51,969 --> 00:00:53,761
Sweet 'stume, dude.

22
00:00:53,846 --> 00:00:55,138
Who are you
supposed to be?

23
00:00:56,140 --> 00:00:57,598
Dave.

24
00:00:57,808 --> 00:00:58,850
Cool.

25
00:00:59,143 --> 00:01:00,685
And you are?

26
00:01:03,856 --> 00:01:05,231
A cat?

27
00:01:05,315 --> 00:01:07,442
We were looking
for kitten.

28
00:01:12,823 --> 00:01:14,907
Give me one second.

29
00:01:15,033 --> 00:01:16,284
- Jim Halpert.
- Hey.

30
00:01:16,410 --> 00:01:18,161
Hey, New York.
Happy Halloween.

31
00:01:18,245 --> 00:01:19,245
Thanks.

32
00:01:19,329 --> 00:01:22,039
My costume's getting
a lot of attention.

33
00:01:22,624 --> 00:01:25,877
So apparently no one dresses
up for Halloween here.

34
00:01:26,503 --> 00:01:27,503
I wish I had known that

35
00:01:27,588 --> 00:01:30,089
before I used greasepaint
for my mustache,

36
00:01:30,674 --> 00:01:34,761
and I can't even take off my
hat because then I'm Hitler.

37
00:01:41,852 --> 00:01:44,103
Want to see
a magic trick?

38
00:01:44,188 --> 00:01:46,689
I'm going to
make a pencil...

39
00:01:49,860 --> 00:01:51,360
...disappear.

40
00:02:13,592 --> 00:02:15,510
Okay,
I think we are set.

41
00:02:15,594 --> 00:02:19,806
We have puzzles,
string for cat's cradles.

42
00:02:20,057 --> 00:02:23,267
Burned this last night.
Little road-trip CD.

43
00:02:23,435 --> 00:02:24,811
Puppets.

44
00:02:25,562 --> 00:02:28,564
Look at all this stuff.
It's only seven hours.

45
00:02:28,649 --> 00:02:31,317
When corporate found out that
we were dating, they decided

46
00:02:31,401 --> 00:02:32,985
they were going to
transfer Holly back

47
00:02:33,070 --> 00:02:34,987
to her old branch in
Nashua, New Hampshire.

48
00:02:35,113 --> 00:02:37,406
Michael's taking a personal
day to move me out.

49
00:02:37,491 --> 00:02:38,574
Road trip!

50
00:02:38,659 --> 00:02:39,867
Right?

51
00:02:39,952 --> 00:02:42,245
Breaker 1-9, copy?

52
00:02:43,413 --> 00:02:44,455
Copy that, breaker!
53
00:02:44,540 --> 00:02:46,624
Those Duke boys
are at it again.

54
00:02:46,708 --> 00:02:50,503
Hey, do not
touch my radio.

55
00:02:50,587 --> 00:02:52,171
We're not.
Kidding.

56
00:02:52,256 --> 00:02:53,840
We're not doing anything.

57
00:02:54,258 --> 00:02:56,926
It's been a weird week since
we found out I had a transfer.

58
00:02:57,261 --> 00:02:59,595
Michael wanted me to quit and
get some job here in Scranton,

59
00:02:59,680 --> 00:03:02,014
and I said, "Well, why don't you
quit and get some job in Nashua?"

60
00:03:02,099 --> 00:03:03,266
And he said,
"I asked you first,"

61
00:03:03,350 --> 00:03:04,976
and I said first
at the same time he did,

62
00:03:05,060 --> 00:03:06,519
and then I said, "Jinx."

63
00:03:06,603 --> 00:03:10,356
And then we never
talked about it again

64
00:03:10,440 --> 00:03:13,234
and haven't been back
to the conversation, so...

65
00:03:13,694 --> 00:03:15,903
All right, everybody,
I am out of here.

66
00:03:15,988 --> 00:03:17,446
Jim, you are in charge.

67
00:03:17,531 --> 00:03:18,656
I'll walk you out.

68
00:03:18,740 --> 00:03:20,449
You are
quite the gentleman.

69
00:03:24,121 --> 00:03:25,872
You can let people go a couple
minutes early if you want.

70
00:03:25,956 --> 00:03:30,126
All right, we'll see.
I am off to New York.

71
00:03:30,210 --> 00:03:33,045
My brother Pete from Boston and
my brother Tom from New Jersey

72
00:03:33,130 --> 00:03:36,465
are taking Pam and I out for lunch
to celebrate the engagement.

73
00:03:37,634 --> 00:03:39,385
Or maybe to beat me up.

74
00:03:39,469 --> 00:03:40,720
I can never tell
with those two.

75
00:03:47,728 --> 00:03:49,061
Morning, temp.

76
00:03:49,146 --> 00:03:50,187
Morning.

77
00:03:50,272 --> 00:03:52,273
Wow. Good morning, Dwight.

78
00:03:52,983 --> 00:03:55,276
I thought I'd go
casual today.

79
00:03:55,360 --> 00:03:56,777
Morning, everyone.

80
00:03:57,487 --> 00:03:59,238
Good morning.

81
00:03:59,865 --> 00:04:01,115
Hello.

82
00:04:02,075 --> 00:04:04,619
How you doing?
How are you, Phyllis?

83
00:04:06,413 --> 00:04:07,830
That's funny.

84
00:04:09,750 --> 00:04:11,667
Take that sweatshirt off.

85
00:04:17,966 --> 00:04:19,091
Hey, buddy.

86
00:04:19,176 --> 00:04:20,176
Andy.

87
00:04:20,260 --> 00:04:21,344
Do you remember
when I jokingly

88
00:04:21,428 --> 00:04:23,888
yelled at you to take
your sweatshirt off?

89
00:04:24,139 --> 00:04:28,351
Totally joking, but you should
know those colors are sacred.

90
00:04:28,769 --> 00:04:32,647
Not that I care, but if
you're not a Cornell man,

91
00:04:32,731 --> 00:04:33,773
you probably
shouldn't wear them.

92
00:04:33,857 --> 00:04:34,899
No, I get it.

93
00:04:34,983 --> 00:04:38,736
I totally understand, and I
just want to assure you that

94
00:04:38,820 --> 00:04:42,615
I mean no disrespect.
You see, I'm applying.

95
00:04:43,992 --> 00:04:45,660
Come on. You think you
could get into Cornell?

96
00:04:45,744 --> 00:04:47,912
Well, if someone who
barely outsells Phyllis

97
00:04:47,996 --> 00:04:49,997
can get in,
then I should be fine.

98
00:04:50,290 --> 00:04:51,374
I'm sitting
right here, Dwight.

99
00:04:51,458 --> 00:04:52,458
I meant that
as a compliment

100
00:04:52,542 --> 00:04:55,211
to you, Phyllis, as well
as a slight to Andy.

101
00:04:56,630 --> 00:04:58,714
Cornell is a good school,
and I want to better myself

102
00:04:58,799 --> 00:05:00,591
through higher education.

103
00:05:00,676 --> 00:05:02,760
If it makes Andy angry,
so be it.

104
00:05:07,099 --> 00:05:08,891
I have to unpack this weekend,
but maybe next weekend

105
00:05:08,976 --> 00:05:10,810
we go to the outlets.
Cool.

106
00:05:10,894 --> 00:05:12,645
Mike, you driving
this every weekend?

107
00:05:12,729 --> 00:05:14,397
We're going to switch back
and forth with the driving.

108
00:05:14,481 --> 00:05:16,816
Sometimes we'll just meet
in the middle. Be fun.

109
00:05:16,900 --> 00:05:19,568
Wait a sec.
I love this song.

110
00:05:22,197 --> 00:05:28,411
Life is a highway I wanna
ride it all night long

111
00:05:31,289 --> 00:05:37,795
If you're going my way I wanna
drive it all night long

112
00:05:40,590 --> 00:05:43,134
If you're going my way

113
00:05:44,469 --> 00:05:45,469
Hey, there.

114
00:05:46,596 --> 00:05:49,598
So, how do you think we're going
to do against Penn this year?

115
00:05:50,017 --> 00:05:51,976
Nathan Ford's arm
looks pretty strong.
116
00:05:52,060 --> 00:05:55,438
Well, he's had a pretty good season so far.
Stop saying "we."

117
00:05:56,690 --> 00:05:58,941
You did not go
to Cornell, okay?

118
00:05:59,026 --> 00:06:00,109
You're just doing this
to screw with me.

119
00:06:00,193 --> 00:06:01,193
Not so.

120
00:06:01,278 --> 00:06:02,778
Cornell is
an excellent school.

121
00:06:02,863 --> 00:06:04,113
Without
its agricultural program,

122
00:06:04,197 --> 00:06:06,073
we probably
wouldn't have cabbage,

123
00:06:06,158 --> 00:06:07,700
at least
not modern cabbage.

124
00:06:07,784 --> 00:06:09,910
I know it's an
excellent school, Dwight.

125
00:06:09,995 --> 00:06:13,873
I went there.
My blood runs Big Red.

126
00:06:14,583 --> 00:06:17,376
Someday we'll both get
together in Comstock Hall

127
00:06:17,461 --> 00:06:19,837
and just laugh
about all of this.
128
00:06:25,177 --> 00:06:26,218
Hey.

129
00:06:26,303 --> 00:06:27,762
Hey, future baby sis.

130
00:06:27,846 --> 00:06:28,971
How are you, Tom?

131
00:06:29,056 --> 00:06:30,139
Nice to see you.
Good.

132
00:06:30,223 --> 00:06:32,641
I asked Tom and Pete to
come early so we could play

133
00:06:32,726 --> 00:06:34,101
a prank on Jim at lunch.

134
00:06:34,478 --> 00:06:35,561
Pretty awesome, right?

135
00:06:36,104 --> 00:06:38,022
I think
they're into the idea.

136
00:06:38,106 --> 00:06:40,733
They're probably thinking,
"That Pam Beesly,

137
00:06:40,817 --> 00:06:43,277
"she's the coolest
sister-in-law on the planet.

138
00:06:44,029 --> 00:06:47,323
"She's the best,
the absolute best."

139
00:06:48,158 --> 00:06:50,159
Okay, so here's
what I'm thinking.

140
00:06:50,243 --> 00:06:54,205
I'm going to say that before
ceramics class I took off my ring,

141
00:06:54,289 --> 00:06:56,207
and then when I changed
back out of my smock,

142
00:06:56,291 --> 00:06:58,709
it wasn't in my pocket
anymore and I lost it.

143
00:07:00,504 --> 00:07:04,840
That's perfect. You know what
would be even more hilarious?

144
00:07:04,925 --> 00:07:05,925
Remember that
thing we did when

145
00:07:06,009 --> 00:07:07,551
Jim was in high school
with his girlfriend?

146
00:07:07,636 --> 00:07:11,222
Right.
That would be hilarious.

147
00:07:11,515 --> 00:07:14,475
Yeah, we should totally dog
her about being an artist,

148
00:07:14,559 --> 00:07:15,684
never making any money.

149
00:07:15,769 --> 00:07:16,852
That is awesome.

150
00:07:16,937 --> 00:07:19,772
Like, she basically
has a hobby for a job.

151
00:07:19,856 --> 00:07:21,148
Oh, yeah.

152
00:07:21,566 --> 00:07:22,608
So, not the ring, then?

153
00:07:22,692 --> 00:07:24,276
The... Not doing
the ring, though?

154
00:07:24,402 --> 00:07:25,611
This is better. The other
thing will get Jim...

155
00:07:25,695 --> 00:07:27,530
This is nice and it's fun.
It's fun.

156
00:07:27,614 --> 00:07:28,614
Okay, okay.

157
00:07:28,698 --> 00:07:30,783
He hates it when we pick
on his girlfriends.

158
00:07:30,867 --> 00:07:32,118
Okay.

159
00:07:32,202 --> 00:07:34,245
They came up with that
idea really fast.

160
00:07:38,125 --> 00:07:39,625
This trip is longer
than I thought.

161
00:07:39,709 --> 00:07:41,001
Yeah, it did look
shorter on the map.

162
00:07:49,136 --> 00:07:50,344
Hey.

163
00:07:52,222 --> 00:07:53,848
Wow, I was
having a nightmare.

164
00:07:53,932 --> 00:07:55,808
You were sleeping?
Yes.

165
00:07:55,892 --> 00:07:57,268
You were talking before.
166
00:07:57,352 --> 00:07:58,352
Was I?

167
00:07:58,436 --> 00:08:01,522
Really? Was I saying
anything interesting?

168
00:08:01,606 --> 00:08:02,982
Not really.

169
00:08:03,066 --> 00:08:05,568
All right, what's the scoop?
How far?

170
00:08:05,694 --> 00:08:08,362
Four hours.
Almost halfway there.

171
00:08:08,446 --> 00:08:09,530
We're only halfway?

172
00:08:09,614 --> 00:08:11,157
Halfway, okay.

173
00:08:11,241 --> 00:08:13,159
You know what I want to do?
I want to pull over

174
00:08:13,243 --> 00:08:14,577
and find a little
bed and breakfast

175
00:08:14,661 --> 00:08:16,370
for when we
meet in the middle.

176
00:08:16,454 --> 00:08:19,707
Emphasis on the
bed and the breakfast.

177
00:08:20,417 --> 00:08:22,751
Next exit
isn't for 5 miles.

178
00:08:22,836 --> 00:08:24,253
Let's check there.

179
00:08:25,422 --> 00:08:27,173
Hey, guys.
How are you?

180
00:08:27,257 --> 00:08:29,091
Hi.
Good to see you.

181
00:08:29,176 --> 00:08:31,343
Nice to see you
again, Pam.

182
00:08:31,428 --> 00:08:33,554
Pam, I haven't seen
you in so, so long.

183
00:08:35,932 --> 00:08:38,267
All right,
so now we can sit

184
00:08:39,603 --> 00:08:41,312
and get comfortable.

185
00:08:46,359 --> 00:08:47,568
There's nothing
out here, man.

186
00:08:47,652 --> 00:08:48,777
Yeah.

187
00:08:48,987 --> 00:08:52,907
I don't know. I just
imagined a hotel right here,

188
00:08:53,617 --> 00:08:57,494
pool over here,
little breakfast place

189
00:08:57,579 --> 00:08:59,663
with really good bacon.
Just...

190
00:09:08,965 --> 00:09:11,050
Here we go.
Fourth time's the charm.
191
00:09:13,303 --> 00:09:15,554
Life's like a road where...

192
00:09:15,639 --> 00:09:17,723
It's one day here
and the next day there

193
00:09:17,807 --> 00:09:20,059
Sometimes you deal
with the things you don't

194
00:09:20,143 --> 00:09:22,853
Sometimes you... Walk

195
00:09:22,938 --> 00:09:23,979
There's a world
out there...

196
00:09:26,858 --> 00:09:30,611
Hey, are you crying?

197
00:09:30,695 --> 00:09:31,779
No.

198
00:09:33,531 --> 00:09:35,157
Allergies?
No.

199
00:09:36,243 --> 00:09:37,743
Did Darryl touch you?

200
00:09:37,827 --> 00:09:38,994
What?

201
00:09:39,621 --> 00:09:41,330
No. Darryl did not
touch me.

202
00:09:41,414 --> 00:09:43,707
Can we just
keep going, please?

203
00:09:51,466 --> 00:09:52,424
What's the matter?
204
00:09:52,509 --> 00:09:54,343
No. It's not
going to work.

205
00:09:54,427 --> 00:09:55,928
There's too much distance.
Sure it is.

206
00:09:56,012 --> 00:09:58,264
No, no, no. It's going to work.
It'll be fine.

207
00:09:58,348 --> 00:10:00,683
Michael, we've only been dating
each other for a few weeks.

208
00:10:00,767 --> 00:10:02,935
Listen to me,
I like you so much.

209
00:10:03,019 --> 00:10:04,061
I like you, too.

210
00:10:04,145 --> 00:10:05,938
And I've dated almost
four women in the last...

211
00:10:06,022 --> 00:10:07,940
I dated four guys
last year, too.

212
00:10:08,024 --> 00:10:10,526
Not last... No, in,
like, the last 10 years

213
00:10:10,694 --> 00:10:16,949
I've dated almost four women, and you
are so far above them, it is stupid.

214
00:10:17,033 --> 00:10:18,784
Michael, no, don't.
It is...

215
00:10:18,868 --> 00:10:19,952
Don't make it harder
than it has to be.
216
00:10:20,036 --> 00:10:21,120
I'm...

217
00:10:22,247 --> 00:10:23,497
That's what she said.

218
00:10:23,581 --> 00:10:26,375
Holly thinks that
this relationship is over.

219
00:10:26,626 --> 00:10:28,002
Well, you know what?

220
00:10:28,086 --> 00:10:30,254
I am not going to
give up that easy.

221
00:10:30,338 --> 00:10:32,798
I'm going to make this way
harder than it needs to be.

222
00:10:38,221 --> 00:10:39,763
Take that down.

223
00:10:39,848 --> 00:10:40,806
Excuse me?

224
00:10:40,890 --> 00:10:43,225
Take that down.

225
00:10:43,351 --> 00:10:45,602
You know, I once dated a
couple guys from Cornell.

226
00:10:45,687 --> 00:10:47,521
They were really nice.
They gave me a ride home.

227
00:10:47,605 --> 00:10:49,857
I seriously doubt that anyone
from Cornell dated you.

228
00:10:49,941 --> 00:10:52,568
It's pronounced "Colonel." It's
the highest rank in the military.
229
00:10:52,652 --> 00:10:56,655
It's pronounced "Cornell." It's the
highest rank in the Ivy League.

230
00:10:56,740 --> 00:11:00,617
Andy, let's just talk about
this man to man after work.

231
00:11:00,910 --> 00:11:01,952
Fine.
What do you say, okay?

232
00:11:02,037 --> 00:11:03,620
Yeah. Good. Can we...

233
00:11:08,084 --> 00:11:09,418
That's Big Red Bear.

234
00:11:09,502 --> 00:11:12,087
That's a bobble
Big Red Bear. God!

235
00:11:16,926 --> 00:11:19,845
And if you leave
on Friday by 5:00,

236
00:11:19,929 --> 00:11:22,514
you'll be rolling in
at midnight at best...

237
00:11:22,599 --> 00:11:23,557
Yeah.

238
00:11:23,641 --> 00:11:25,726
...and then
sleep in Saturday.

239
00:11:26,019 --> 00:11:27,978
That only leaves us
less than 24 hours

240
00:11:28,063 --> 00:11:29,271
before you have
to go back again.

241
00:11:29,356 --> 00:11:30,439
Okay. Okay.

242
00:11:30,523 --> 00:11:33,525
I will talk to you on the
Bluetooth the entire trip

243
00:11:33,610 --> 00:11:36,070
so we're talking
constantly all the way.

244
00:11:36,154 --> 00:11:39,031
I'll tell you everything that I
see, everything that I pass by,

245
00:11:39,115 --> 00:11:40,115
things that I witness
on the road.

246
00:11:40,200 --> 00:11:41,200
Well...

247
00:11:41,284 --> 00:11:43,452
Maybe I'll see an
accident one weekend.

248
00:11:43,536 --> 00:11:44,787
How long can
we keep that up?

249
00:11:44,871 --> 00:11:45,871
Years.

250
00:11:45,955 --> 00:11:47,373
Years?
Yeah.

251
00:11:47,457 --> 00:11:50,042
Years of just a few
hours every weekend?

252
00:11:50,126 --> 00:11:51,877
Here's my wish,

253
00:11:51,961 --> 00:11:54,713
I want you to meet a great guy
and I want you to be happy.
254
00:11:56,966 --> 00:11:57,925
Thank you.

255
00:11:58,009 --> 00:12:00,177
My wish has come true,
incidentally,

256
00:12:00,261 --> 00:12:03,972
because you've met me
and you are happy.

257
00:12:05,600 --> 00:12:06,850
Clever, Mike.

258
00:12:07,519 --> 00:12:10,396
So, Pam, how much money
does an artist make

259
00:12:10,480 --> 00:12:11,855
after they leave
art school?

260
00:12:12,399 --> 00:12:14,316
Yeah, not a lot of money
in the arts, right?

261
00:12:14,401 --> 00:12:15,776
That's not really true.

262
00:12:15,860 --> 00:12:18,070
There's a lot of things you can
do with an art degree, actually.

263
00:12:18,154 --> 00:12:19,696
Maybe Pam should
pay the check

264
00:12:19,781 --> 00:12:22,116
by drawing a picture
on this napkin.

265
00:12:23,785 --> 00:12:25,994
Wow, that's
a little rude.

266
00:12:26,121 --> 00:12:27,079
What's your deal?

267
00:12:27,163 --> 00:12:28,747
Hey, just having
fun, Jimmy.

268
00:12:28,832 --> 00:12:30,165
Yeah. Right, Pam?

269
00:12:30,250 --> 00:12:31,333
Yep.

270
00:12:37,632 --> 00:12:39,591
You know what? I think
we're a great couple.

271
00:12:39,676 --> 00:12:41,051
I think we are
a classic couple.

272
00:12:41,136 --> 00:12:43,345
I think we are like
Romeo and Juliet.

273
00:12:43,430 --> 00:12:47,141
I think we go together so well.

274
00:12:47,225 --> 00:12:49,226
We're like peanut
butter and jelly.

275
00:12:49,310 --> 00:12:51,270
Don't you think?
I do. I think so, Mike.

276
00:12:51,354 --> 00:12:53,021
Well, then don't do it.
Please don't do this!

277
00:12:53,106 --> 00:12:54,189
Please don't do this!

278
00:12:54,732 --> 00:12:57,192
Hey, what's up? Just
thought I'd try you.

279
00:12:57,610 --> 00:12:58,944
Thinking about
that story where

280
00:12:59,028 --> 00:13:01,405
you ran into the girl
you used to baby-sit.

281
00:13:01,698 --> 00:13:02,823
I don't know
what I am gonna do.

282
00:13:02,907 --> 00:13:03,949
Please call me back.

283
00:13:04,033 --> 00:13:05,033
Please...
I promise you.

284
00:13:05,118 --> 00:13:06,243
I'm not going to be okay.
Please...

285
00:13:06,327 --> 00:13:07,286
No, I won't.

286
00:13:07,370 --> 00:13:10,873
I'm not strong. I'll go back
to Jan, and I hate Jan.

287
00:13:11,958 --> 00:13:13,750
Oh, God.

288
00:13:16,379 --> 00:13:17,463
You might be...

289
00:13:17,547 --> 00:13:18,672
What?

290
00:13:21,217 --> 00:13:22,176
Dwight...

291
00:13:22,260 --> 00:13:23,552
Andy, I've been
meaning to ask you.

292
00:13:23,636 --> 00:13:25,471
Which a cappella group
should I join?

293
00:13:25,555 --> 00:13:29,224
The Harmoniacs?
Or the Do-Re-Migos?

294
00:13:31,227 --> 00:13:35,981
Assuming you had the voice to be
in any of them, it's irrelevant,

295
00:13:36,065 --> 00:13:38,150
because I called admissions
and it looks like

296
00:13:38,234 --> 00:13:41,528
I will be conducting
your university interview.

297
00:13:42,322 --> 00:13:43,322
That's a conflict
of interest.

298
00:13:43,406 --> 00:13:44,781
Yeah. Big one.

299
00:13:45,200 --> 00:13:47,367
So should I not
let you in now?

300
00:13:47,452 --> 00:13:49,620
Or do you want to
do the interview

301
00:13:49,704 --> 00:13:51,455
and then
I won't let you in?

302
00:13:53,416 --> 00:13:55,167
Interview.
Excellent.

303
00:13:57,337 --> 00:14:01,340
When the hour glass strikes
3:00, then in the room

304
00:14:01,424 --> 00:14:03,592
whence employees confer.

305
00:14:05,595 --> 00:14:06,637
What?
The conference room.

306
00:14:06,721 --> 00:14:07,804
Okay.

307
00:14:13,436 --> 00:14:15,187
Who are your role models?

308
00:14:15,271 --> 00:14:17,189
If I had to put Dwight's
chances into a percentage,

309
00:14:17,273 --> 00:14:20,192
I would say he has
none percent chance.

310
00:14:20,276 --> 00:14:22,778
So, Dane Cook,

311
00:14:23,571 --> 00:14:28,283
Jack Bauer and Eli Whitney.

312
00:14:31,496 --> 00:14:32,955
You're doing great.

313
00:14:33,289 --> 00:14:35,457
Life is a highway

314
00:14:35,792 --> 00:14:38,627
I wanna ride it
all night long

315
00:14:42,924 --> 00:14:45,926
Oh, wow. This is
my niece Vanessa.

316
00:14:46,010 --> 00:14:48,428
She's a trumpeter,
and look at her.

317
00:14:48,638 --> 00:14:49,972
Cute.
That must be really fun

318
00:14:50,056 --> 00:14:51,890
for you and Marci, huh?
Yep.

319
00:14:51,975 --> 00:14:54,309
She only knows how to play When
the Saints Go Marching In.

320
00:14:54,394 --> 00:14:55,394
I love that one.

321
00:14:55,478 --> 00:14:56,687
Yeah, but
she doesn't think

322
00:14:56,771 --> 00:14:59,231
she's going to be, like,
a career musician, right?

323
00:14:59,357 --> 00:15:00,941
Here we go again.
What is your deal today?

324
00:15:01,025 --> 00:15:02,901
I'm just saying how
many famous trumpeters

325
00:15:02,986 --> 00:15:04,778
can you name
besides Louis Armstrong?

326
00:15:04,862 --> 00:15:05,862
Miles Davis.
One.

327
00:15:05,947 --> 00:15:07,239
Chet something.
Half.

328
00:15:07,323 --> 00:15:08,907
The point is, Pam,
that there are jobs...

329
00:15:08,992 --> 00:15:11,034
Dizzy Gillespie.
Also good.

330
00:15:11,119 --> 00:15:13,245
...and there are hobbies. I love
baseball more than anything,

331
00:15:13,329 --> 00:15:14,997
but you don't see me
trying to get on the Mets.

332
00:15:15,081 --> 00:15:16,540
You don't. Pete, you
couldn't make the Mets.

333
00:15:16,624 --> 00:15:17,708
She's at Pratt.

334
00:15:17,792 --> 00:15:19,126
You played JV baseball.

335
00:15:19,210 --> 00:15:20,627
Will you lighten up
a little bit?

336
00:15:20,712 --> 00:15:21,920
I'm just calling it
like I see it.

337
00:15:22,005 --> 00:15:23,255
I don't know if I'm
going to make any money

338
00:15:23,339 --> 00:15:24,423
with art.
Pam, don't worry about it.

339
00:15:24,507 --> 00:15:27,259
I mean, it's a very competitive
field, but I have a professor

340
00:15:27,343 --> 00:15:28,635
who says that I have
a lot of promise,

341
00:15:28,720 --> 00:15:31,221
and if I don't try now,
I never will, so...

342
00:15:32,515 --> 00:15:34,266
Guys, what is going on?

343
00:15:38,021 --> 00:15:40,022
We pranked you.

344
00:15:40,106 --> 00:15:41,189
It was Pam's idea.

345
00:15:41,274 --> 00:15:44,067
Pam was the mastermind.

346
00:15:44,152 --> 00:15:45,193
Got you.

347
00:15:45,612 --> 00:15:49,364
That was killer.
I was so close to blowing it.

348
00:15:50,199 --> 00:15:52,034
Let's see how well you
know your Big Red history.

349
00:15:52,118 --> 00:15:53,118
Bring it.

350
00:15:53,202 --> 00:15:54,786
Who was Cornell's
eighth president?

351
00:15:54,871 --> 00:15:56,204
Dale Raymond Corson.

352
00:15:56,289 --> 00:15:59,041
I'm sorry, that's incorrect. Cornell's
seventh president was, in fact,

353
00:15:59,250 --> 00:16:00,626
James A. Perkins.

354
00:16:00,710 --> 00:16:02,836
"Comprehension
skills subpar."
355
00:16:03,713 --> 00:16:07,132
"Interviewing skills,
subpar."

356
00:16:07,216 --> 00:16:08,300
What are you writing?

357
00:16:08,885 --> 00:16:10,719
You can't even give Cornell
your full attention.

358
00:16:10,803 --> 00:16:12,220
On the contrary,
I'm helping Cornell

359
00:16:12,305 --> 00:16:14,014
by evaluating
their interviewers.

360
00:16:14,515 --> 00:16:16,767
Nobody wants that
to happen.

361
00:16:16,851 --> 00:16:18,268
Well, when they get
my evaluation,

362
00:16:18,353 --> 00:16:19,936
we'll see
if they're interested.

363
00:16:20,563 --> 00:16:23,857
"Applicant is attempting
to blackmail interviewer,

364
00:16:23,941 --> 00:16:25,942
"showing
low moral character."

365
00:16:26,027 --> 00:16:27,653
"Interviewer is
threatening applicant

366
00:16:27,737 --> 00:16:29,613
"with an arbitrary
review process."
367
00:16:29,697 --> 00:16:31,531
"Applicant is
wasting everyone's time

368
00:16:31,616 --> 00:16:33,742
"with stupid and
inane accusations."

369
00:16:33,826 --> 00:16:36,411
"Interviewer has
suspect motives."

370
00:16:36,746 --> 00:16:40,499
"Applicant has a head shaped
like a trapezoid."

371
00:16:40,583 --> 00:16:43,710
"Interviewer has turned off
applicant's interest in Cornell

372
00:16:43,795 --> 00:16:47,172
"and they are going to go to the
vastly superior Dartmouth."

373
00:16:47,256 --> 00:16:48,298
Ever heard of it?

374
00:16:48,383 --> 00:16:49,758
I think I have
everything I need.

375
00:16:49,842 --> 00:16:51,176
I think I have
everything I need.

376
00:16:51,260 --> 00:16:52,928
You'll be hearing from the
Cornell Application Department.

377
00:16:53,012 --> 00:16:55,013
And you will be hearing from the
Cornell Application Department.

378
00:16:55,098 --> 00:16:57,015
And you will not be
pleased with the result!
379
00:16:57,100 --> 00:17:01,395
And your affiliation with
Cornell will end completely.

380
00:17:02,605 --> 00:17:04,773
That is all, sir.
You may go.

381
00:17:18,287 --> 00:17:20,414
There's another dolly
in the truck, Mike.

382
00:17:20,498 --> 00:17:22,624
You can take
more than that lamp.

383
00:17:24,210 --> 00:17:26,503
For the record, I wanted
to go another direction,

384
00:17:26,587 --> 00:17:27,921
which was way better.

385
00:17:28,005 --> 00:17:30,215
Well, I'll be the judge of that.

386
00:17:30,299 --> 00:17:31,383
What do you got?

387
00:17:31,467 --> 00:17:33,719
Okay, I lost
my engagement ring

388
00:17:33,803 --> 00:17:36,304
in ceramics class,
left it in my smock.

389
00:17:36,389 --> 00:17:39,057
I had this whole thing
where I go back to class,

390
00:17:39,142 --> 00:17:42,310
wrongly accuse another girl.
Look, I even used makeup

391
00:17:42,395 --> 00:17:43,478
to put a ring
around my finger.

392
00:17:43,563 --> 00:17:44,604
You can hardly see it.

393
00:17:44,689 --> 00:17:46,356
It's very subtle.
That is good.

394
00:17:46,441 --> 00:17:47,399
Thank you.

395
00:17:47,483 --> 00:17:48,483
Truthfully,
anything would have been

396
00:17:48,568 --> 00:17:49,943
better than
that prank.

397
00:17:52,655 --> 00:17:56,783
Text message from my brother. "Pam cool.
Welcome to the family."

398
00:17:57,785 --> 00:17:58,827
Hey, how about
at Thanksgiving

399
00:17:58,911 --> 00:18:00,704
we "prank" Tom
about being bald?

400
00:18:01,164 --> 00:18:02,289
This is the last of it.

401
00:18:02,373 --> 00:18:04,082
That's mine, actually.

402
00:18:04,167 --> 00:18:06,376
Maybe put it
back in the truck.

403
00:18:06,836 --> 00:18:07,961
You're not staying?

404
00:18:08,045 --> 00:18:09,379
You know,
I have some things

405
00:18:09,464 --> 00:18:11,047
I need to do this weekend.

406
00:18:11,132 --> 00:18:12,674
I just remembered, so...

407
00:18:13,217 --> 00:18:15,260
I'll just ride back
with you.

408
00:18:15,344 --> 00:18:16,595
But you want me to put
it back in the truck?

409
00:18:16,679 --> 00:18:18,430
I'll be down in just a sec.

410
00:18:20,600 --> 00:18:22,976
Holly?

411
00:18:23,394 --> 00:18:24,686
So...

412
00:18:26,981 --> 00:18:29,357
I think I'm going to
go back with Darryl.

413
00:18:39,410 --> 00:18:40,535
Okay.

414
00:18:41,037 --> 00:18:42,037
Bye.

415
00:18:42,121 --> 00:18:43,830
Okay, bye.

416
00:19:08,147 --> 00:19:09,648
I know it's hard, Mike.

417
00:19:12,401 --> 00:19:13,777
Breakups hurt.
418
00:19:14,737 --> 00:19:16,488
We didn't break up.

419
00:19:17,240 --> 00:19:18,406
Looked like it.

420
00:19:22,912 --> 00:19:27,666
Sometimes when I'm down like this,
it helps to sing the blues.

421
00:19:28,793 --> 00:19:29,918
Okay.

422
00:19:36,759 --> 00:19:38,844
That's a really
pretty song.

423
00:19:40,513 --> 00:19:42,389
No, no,
check it out, look.

424
00:19:43,933 --> 00:19:45,642
When I do that...
Okay.

425
00:19:45,726 --> 00:19:47,394
...that's when you hit me
with what's getting you down.

426
00:19:47,478 --> 00:19:48,645
All right.

427
00:19:56,362 --> 00:19:58,780
No, wait,
you're supposed to...

428
00:20:00,116 --> 00:20:01,116
Never mind.

429
00:20:13,296 --> 00:20:14,337
Yeah.

430
00:20:16,757 --> 00:20:17,841
Yeah.

431
00:20:27,143 --> 00:20:29,811
Well, I thought I'd
come in casual today.

432
00:20:30,813 --> 00:20:34,149
Man, hungry. Anyone
else feel like a beet?

433
00:20:35,359 --> 00:20:36,401
Where did you get those?

434
00:20:36,485 --> 00:20:37,861
What, these?

435
00:20:38,946 --> 00:20:41,197
Bernard Farms. Best
beets in the state.

436
00:20:41,282 --> 00:20:43,199
I see what you are doing,

437
00:20:43,326 --> 00:20:45,285
but I do not know where
you are going with this.

438
00:20:45,369 --> 00:20:49,414
Well, you will as soon as
you visit my new beet farm.

439
00:20:56,505 --> 00:20:57,756
You're supposed to
cook these, aren't you?

440
00:20:58,966 --> 00:21:00,133
Cornell.