1

00:00:09,593 --> 00:00:11,344

What is this?

2
00:00:11,428 --> 00:00:12,970
Happy holidays, Dwight.

3
00:00:13,055 --> 00:00:15,181
But do not open it
till Christmas.

4
00:00:15,265 --> 00:00:17,850
You're so pathetic. How long did
this take you, three hours?

5
00:00:17,935 --> 00:00:21,145
Five minutes, actually. I'm a
black belt in gift wrapping.

6
00:00:21,230 --> 00:00:22,313
Yeah, no such thing.

7
00:00:22,398 --> 00:00:25,274
They don't give out black belts
for things that are stupid.

8
00:00:25,984 --> 00:00:27,110
Well, I hope
it was worth it,

9
00:00:27,194 --> 00:00:29,904
because I'm going to take it
apart in about five minutes.

10
00:00:29,988 --> 00:00:31,864
I think it'll take you a
little bit longer than that.

11
00:00:31,949 --> 00:00:35,159
Really. If I can skin a mule
deer in less than 10 minutes,

12
00:00:35,244 --> 00:00:37,537
I ought to be
able to cut my...

13
00:01:15,325 --> 00:01:17,910
I'm sorry. It's the
largest one I have.

14
00:01:17,995 --> 00:01:20,496
I will not be the big
guy in the tiny hat.

15
00:01:22,166 --> 00:01:23,583
This is the first
Christmas party

16
00:01:23,667 --> 00:01:25,960
I'm throwing as head of the
Party Planning Committee.

17
00:01:26,044 --> 00:01:28,880
The theme is
Nights in Morocco.

18
00:01:28,964 --> 00:01:31,966
This isn't your grandmother's
Christmas party.

19
00:01:32,050 --> 00:01:33,926
Unless of course
she's from Morocco,

20
00:01:34,011 --> 00:01:35,762
in which case
it's very accurate.

21
00:01:35,846 --> 00:01:39,390
Hey, Phyllis, do I need this
invite to get into the party?

22
00:01:39,475 --> 00:01:40,892
Yes.
Awesome.

23
00:01:40,976 --> 00:01:45,062
I think this is going to be the
best Christmas party ever.

24
00:01:47,649 --> 00:01:51,110
Angela, you're going to move
this for the party, right?

25
00:01:51,195 --> 00:01:52,779
It's not on theme.

26
00:01:52,863 --> 00:01:54,781
It's the Nativity scene.

27
00:01:55,908 --> 00:01:57,325
All right.

28
00:01:57,367 --> 00:02:00,787
You can keep your camel,
sheep, elephant... Hey.

29
00:02:00,871 --> 00:02:02,246
And the North African
king can stay.

30
00:02:02,331 --> 00:02:05,458
Everything else
goes in the drawer.

31
00:02:06,335 --> 00:02:09,587
I am not going to judge Phyllis
for desecrating Christmas.

32
00:02:09,671 --> 00:02:11,464
There is one person
who will, though,

33
00:02:11,548 --> 00:02:13,549
and Phyllis just
stuffed him into a drawer.

34
00:02:13,634 --> 00:02:15,051
I need you to
get rid of the tree.

35
00:02:15,135 --> 00:02:17,053
But... But...
Thank you.

36
00:02:18,555 --> 00:02:20,515
Oh, I don't
think it's blackmail.

37
00:02:20,599 --> 00:02:22,892
Angela just does
what I ask her to do

38
00:02:22,976 --> 00:02:27,146
so I won't tell everyone that she's
cheating on Andy with Dwight.

39
00:02:27,231 --> 00:02:28,981
I think for it
to be blackmail,

40
00:02:29,066 --> 00:02:31,108
it would have to be
a formal letter.

41
00:02:37,741 --> 00:02:40,743
Ah, you brought in
your doll collection.

42
00:02:40,828 --> 00:02:42,662
These are not dolls, Jim.

43
00:02:42,746 --> 00:02:45,915
These are commodities,
same as gold or oil.

44
00:02:45,999 --> 00:02:47,625
Every year,
I do research to determine

45
00:02:47,709 --> 00:02:50,670
which toy will be the most
popular of the Christmas season.

46
00:02:50,754 --> 00:02:54,340
This year, it's a doll.
Half-girl, half-unicorn.

47
00:02:55,759 --> 00:02:58,261
Catchphrase, "My horn
can pierce the sky!"

48
00:02:59,304 --> 00:03:00,596
Pathetic.

49
00:03:01,265 --> 00:03:04,517
I bought out every store in the
area over the last couple of weeks.
50
00:03:04,601 --> 00:03:06,936
And as lazy parents
become more desperate,

51
00:03:07,020 --> 00:03:09,355
I will sell them
at an enormous profit.

52
00:03:10,399 --> 00:03:12,483
Isn't that right, princess?

53
00:03:13,944 --> 00:03:14,902
That's the Christmas spirit.

54
00:03:14,987 --> 00:03:16,571
I am simply punishing
those parents

55
00:03:16,655 --> 00:03:19,282
that would wait till the last
minute to give their child a gift,

56
00:03:19,366 --> 00:03:21,200
and such a genetically
improbable one.

57
00:03:21,285 --> 00:03:22,952
Look at that.
How does that happen?

58
00:03:23,036 --> 00:03:24,829
The king has sex
with a unicorn?

59
00:03:24,913 --> 00:03:26,664
Man with a horn has sex
with a royal horse?

60
00:03:26,790 --> 00:03:28,207
Yes. Hey, is that
Princess Unicorn?

61
00:03:28,292 --> 00:03:29,667
I thought they were
all sold out.
62
00:03:29,751 --> 00:03:31,294
They are now.
Cool.

63
00:03:31,378 --> 00:03:34,255
My horn
can pierce the sky!

64
00:03:41,054 --> 00:03:45,808
This is equal parts scotch,
absinthe, rum, gin,

65
00:03:45,893 --> 00:03:49,645
vermouth, triple sec,
and two packs of Splenda.

66
00:03:49,730 --> 00:03:51,981
Call it a
"one of everything."

67
00:03:56,361 --> 00:04:00,072
Oh, my God!

68
00:04:01,491 --> 00:04:02,909
Hit me again!
All right.

69
00:04:02,993 --> 00:04:04,076
One more time
around the block.

70
00:04:06,163 --> 00:04:07,872
I will grant you one wish.

71
00:04:08,707 --> 00:04:11,751
I wish you would stop rubbing
that lamp in that creepy way.

72
00:04:11,835 --> 00:04:15,004
Stupid. Everybody knows to
ask for 100 more wishes.

73
00:04:15,088 --> 00:04:16,172
Dumb.

74
00:04:23,472 --> 00:04:25,932
Hey, hey, Ang,
check it out.

75
00:04:26,016 --> 00:04:32,772
There's a place in France
Where the naked ladies dance

76
00:04:33,982 --> 00:04:36,025
Really, Andy?
It's Christmas,

77
00:04:36,109 --> 00:04:38,402
and you're singing
about nudity and France.

78
00:04:39,529 --> 00:04:46,243
There's a hole in the wall
Where the men can see it all

79
00:04:48,121 --> 00:04:50,581
Jim, check that out.
What is it?

80
00:04:50,666 --> 00:04:53,084
That is vodka, and I mixed
it with orange juice.

81
00:04:53,168 --> 00:04:55,252
I call it an
"orange vodjuiceka."

82
00:04:58,465 --> 00:05:00,257
Wow, that is delicious.
Yeah.

83
00:05:00,384 --> 00:05:02,176
I can't believe no one's
thought of that. I know!

84
00:05:17,192 --> 00:05:19,068
Belly dancing.

85
00:05:19,236 --> 00:05:21,821
$120, $180, $200.

86
00:05:21,905 --> 00:05:23,155
All right.
87
00:05:23,240 --> 00:05:25,658
Oh, thank you so much. My
daughter is going to love this.

88
00:05:25,742 --> 00:05:27,660
Oh. So glad I could help.
Thanks.

89
00:05:27,744 --> 00:05:29,078
Merry Christmas.
You, too.

90
00:05:29,162 --> 00:05:31,914
Fa la la la, la la, ka-ching

91
00:05:34,710 --> 00:05:38,754
Oh. So this is what every day would
be like if you hadn't left India?

92
00:05:43,093 --> 00:05:44,427
She's burning.

93
00:05:44,553 --> 00:05:45,636
Oh, my God!

94
00:05:45,721 --> 00:05:48,514
We got
a live one! On fire!

95
00:05:57,816 --> 00:06:00,359
I'm all right.
I'm all right.

96
00:06:13,040 --> 00:06:14,165
Sorry.

97
00:06:15,000 --> 00:06:16,959
We're back on the 5th.
Should we just do it then?

98
00:06:17,044 --> 00:06:20,463
Cannot do it then, monthly
dental appointment.

99
00:06:20,547 --> 00:06:21,714
Soft teeth.

100
00:06:21,798 --> 00:06:23,632
What about
February 2nd?

101
00:06:23,800 --> 00:06:26,010
Would you want to
do it on Groundhog Day?

102
00:06:26,136 --> 00:06:29,472
No. No. I celebrate privately.
That's right.

103
00:06:29,556 --> 00:06:31,557
Why don't we just do it now?
We'll do it quickly.

104
00:06:31,641 --> 00:06:33,601
Now? It's our Christmas party.
We'll do it quickly.

105
00:06:33,685 --> 00:06:34,769
Well, what if we
can't do it quickly?

106
00:06:34,853 --> 00:06:36,062
"What if we can't
do it quickly?

107
00:06:36,146 --> 00:06:37,897
"What if we can't do it?"

108
00:06:38,815 --> 00:06:40,691
Do you know how
to do an intervention?

109
00:06:40,776 --> 00:06:42,193
Hey, shut up.

110
00:06:42,277 --> 00:06:43,778
Here we go.
Everybody, gather up.

111
00:06:43,862 --> 00:06:46,238
An intervention, it's
sort of hard to describe,
112
00:06:46,323 --> 00:06:50,284
but, really,
it's a coming together.

113
00:06:50,368 --> 00:06:55,664
It's a surprise party for
people who have addictions.

114
00:06:57,125 --> 00:06:59,877
And you get in their face
and you scream at them,

115
00:06:59,961 --> 00:07:03,422
and you make them feel really
badly about themselves.

116
00:07:03,507 --> 00:07:04,715
And then they stop.

117
00:07:05,175 --> 00:07:06,842
It looks like we're going
to be here for a while,

118
00:07:06,927 --> 00:07:09,303
so why don't you make a little
plate of hummus for everyone?

119
00:07:09,387 --> 00:07:11,972
Little triangles of pita,
toasted on both side,

120
00:07:12,057 --> 00:07:13,474
fanned so you can
easily grab them.

121
00:07:13,558 --> 00:07:15,684
I know...
And napkins, fanned.

122
00:07:17,562 --> 00:07:20,189
Okay. How do you feel?

123
00:07:20,273 --> 00:07:21,982
Little better.
I threw up.
124
00:07:22,567 --> 00:07:25,236
TMI.
Fire girl.

125
00:07:27,906 --> 00:07:29,448
Too soon.
Yeah.

126
00:07:29,533 --> 00:07:31,951
Okay, you know what I
thought we should do

127
00:07:32,035 --> 00:07:34,495
is have a quick intervention and
then get back to the party.

128
00:07:34,579 --> 00:07:37,414
Michael, we're only allowed to talk
about Meredith's work performance.

129
00:07:37,499 --> 00:07:38,958
We cannot ask her
to stop drinking.

130
00:07:39,042 --> 00:07:40,793
I am not asking her
to stop drinking.

131
00:07:40,877 --> 00:07:44,964
I am imploring her to
quit being an alcoholic.

132
00:07:45,048 --> 00:07:46,173
I'm not an alcoholic.

133
00:07:46,258 --> 00:07:48,092
Yeah,
obviously you are.

134
00:07:49,553 --> 00:07:51,720
Okay, everybody who thinks
that Meredith is an alcoholic,

135
00:07:51,805 --> 00:07:53,097
please raise
your hands.
136
00:07:53,181 --> 00:07:54,974
Aye.
The ayes have it.

137
00:07:55,058 --> 00:07:57,768
I don't care what
everyone thinks.

138
00:07:57,853 --> 00:08:00,896
I know I am not an alcoholic.

139
00:08:00,981 --> 00:08:03,274
All right, well,

140
00:08:03,358 --> 00:08:06,068
let's look at this a little
bit closer, then, shall we?

141
00:08:06,736 --> 00:08:10,906
When I was in college,
I used to get wicked hammered.

142
00:08:12,242 --> 00:08:15,161
My nickname was "Puke."
I would chug a fifth of So-Co,

143
00:08:15,245 --> 00:08:19,915
sneak into a frat party, polish
off a few people's empties,

144
00:08:20,625 --> 00:08:22,960
some brewskies,
some Jell-O shots,

145
00:08:23,044 --> 00:08:25,504
do some body shots
off myself,

146
00:08:25,589 --> 00:08:28,007
pass out, wake up
the next morning,

147
00:08:28,091 --> 00:08:32,386
boot, rally, more So-Co,
head to class.

148
00:08:33,096 --> 00:08:35,347
Probably would have gotten expelled
if I'd let it affect my grades,

149
00:08:35,432 --> 00:08:38,517
but I aced all my courses.
They called me "Ace."

150
00:08:38,602 --> 00:08:42,313
It was totally awesome. I got straight Bs.
They called me "Buzz."

151
00:08:43,190 --> 00:08:46,650
Meredith, "have you ever used
alcohol to alter your mood

152
00:08:46,735 --> 00:08:48,819
"or deliberately change
your state of mind?"

153
00:08:48,904 --> 00:08:49,945
Sure.

154
00:08:50,614 --> 00:08:52,072
"Do you sometimes have
a drink to celebrate

155
00:08:52,157 --> 00:08:54,533
"a special occasion
or mark a holiday?"

156
00:08:54,618 --> 00:08:55,951
Obviously.

157
00:08:56,953 --> 00:08:59,163
"Have you ever, under
the influence of alcohol,

158
00:08:59,247 --> 00:09:01,874
"questioned the teachings
of the Mormon Church?"

159
00:09:01,958 --> 00:09:05,127
Where did you get this? I got it on
a website. That's not important.

160
00:09:05,212 --> 00:09:06,587
Michael, we should
contact some experts.

161
00:09:06,671 --> 00:09:08,047
You don't know
what you're doing.

162
00:09:08,131 --> 00:09:11,550
Okay, you know what, Toby? One of my
employees is undergoing a crisis,

163
00:09:11,635 --> 00:09:13,385
and I wish, for just once,

164
00:09:13,470 --> 00:09:15,346
you would take
my side on this.

165
00:09:15,430 --> 00:09:17,097
I'm doing your job, man.

166
00:09:17,766 --> 00:09:19,308
Hey, are you texting?

167
00:09:19,392 --> 00:09:21,227
Yeah, 'cause
this is kind of a drag.

168
00:09:21,311 --> 00:09:23,896
Alcohol is a drag, yes.
Here's what I'd like to do.

169
00:09:23,980 --> 00:09:28,067
I'd like to go around the room and
have us each express to Meredith

170
00:09:28,151 --> 00:09:30,778
how her alcoholism
has affected us.

171
00:09:31,613 --> 00:09:34,073
I'll begin.
This Christmas party

172
00:09:34,157 --> 00:09:37,910
is perhaps the best Christmas
party I have ever been to.
173
00:09:37,994 --> 00:09:41,497
But then you got so drunk that
we had to stop and do this.

174
00:09:41,581 --> 00:09:43,999
That's how your
drinking affected me.

175
00:09:44,084 --> 00:09:48,295
Anybody else? Another time when
Meredith's drinking affected you?

176
00:09:50,131 --> 00:09:51,799
Come on, people.
If we don't say anything,

177
00:09:51,883 --> 00:09:53,550
she's not going to
get any better.

178
00:09:53,635 --> 00:09:55,177
Yes, Kevin.

179
00:09:55,262 --> 00:09:57,846
Well, Meredith,
there was that one time

180
00:09:57,931 --> 00:09:59,723
that you bought
movie tickets

181
00:09:59,808 --> 00:10:02,142
and then you got
too drunk to go,

182
00:10:02,477 --> 00:10:06,313
so you gave them to me,
and that was really cool.

183
00:10:06,439 --> 00:10:09,650
That's... You didn't...
You weren't hurt by that.

184
00:10:09,734 --> 00:10:11,902
Yeah, you said
"affected" by it.
185
00:10:12,028 --> 00:10:13,195
Thanks again, Meredith.
You're welcome.

186
00:10:13,280 --> 00:10:15,406
No, that's not
what we're going for.

187
00:10:15,490 --> 00:10:19,159
Who has a problem with Meredith's drinking?
It has to bother you.

188
00:10:19,244 --> 00:10:22,329
It bothers me, right?
How does it bother you?

189
00:10:22,414 --> 00:10:24,290
Dwight, don't you
have anything?

190
00:10:24,374 --> 00:10:26,292
No. I like Meredith.

191
00:10:26,376 --> 00:10:27,960
Actually, I don't
care for Meredith,

192
00:10:28,044 --> 00:10:30,087
but I don't believe in
this kind of thing.

193
00:10:30,171 --> 00:10:33,382
In the Schrute family, we believe
in a five-fingered intervention.

194
00:10:33,466 --> 00:10:37,886
Awareness, education, control,
acceptance and punching.

195
00:10:38,346 --> 00:10:40,264
Who's going to tell us
the latest dirty joke?

196
00:10:40,348 --> 00:10:42,725
Who is going to tell us what you
watched on television last night?
197
00:10:42,809 --> 00:10:44,310
I am fine.

198
00:10:44,394 --> 00:10:48,147
Was John Belushi fine?
Was Bob Hope fine?

199
00:10:49,232 --> 00:10:51,734
Hey, come here.

200
00:10:53,945 --> 00:10:56,572
If anything ever
happened to you,

201
00:10:56,656 --> 00:11:00,743
I would be very angry at myself for
not doing all that I could do.

202
00:11:01,411 --> 00:11:04,705
I know I drink.
I like to party.

203
00:11:04,789 --> 00:11:06,623
I want you to say,
"I'm an alcoholic."

204
00:11:06,708 --> 00:11:09,168
I'm not an alcoholic!

205
00:11:09,252 --> 00:11:11,045
You can say it
as loudly as you want,

206
00:11:11,129 --> 00:11:13,339
but we're not going
to believe you.

207
00:11:13,423 --> 00:11:17,760
I was waiting until later to hand out
this year's gifts from corporate.

208
00:11:20,013 --> 00:11:22,514
I don't think they're
appropriate anymore.

209
00:11:27,937 --> 00:11:29,646
Please stop making me
do these things.

210
00:11:29,731 --> 00:11:31,523
Sorry, it's your job.

211
00:11:31,608 --> 00:11:33,692
But it's the season of mercy.

212
00:11:33,777 --> 00:11:37,029
You never showed me mercy
when you were in charge.

213
00:11:37,781 --> 00:11:39,782
Why aren't you
wearing the hairnet?

214
00:11:39,866 --> 00:11:41,200
I lost it.

215
00:11:43,745 --> 00:11:44,870
Fine.

216
00:11:50,627 --> 00:11:53,003
Okay. Nice.

217
00:11:56,174 --> 00:12:00,969
I don't mind telling you that
I have an addiction. I do.

218
00:12:01,096 --> 00:12:02,137
To porn.

219
00:12:02,222 --> 00:12:05,557
All right,
no, no, no, no.

220
00:12:05,642 --> 00:12:09,311
That is... The image, I think we
can all agree, is very disgusting,

221
00:12:09,396 --> 00:12:11,730
but you know what,
Meredith?

222
00:12:12,941 --> 00:12:16,568
You lit your hair on fire today.
What about tomorrow?

223
00:12:16,653 --> 00:12:20,614
What is going to happen when you
come into work and you're dead?

224
00:12:21,032 --> 00:12:23,242
I stab her in the brain
with a wooden stick.

225
00:12:23,326 --> 00:12:25,452
There are several ways
to kill a zombie,

226
00:12:25,537 --> 00:12:29,289
but the most satisfying one is to stab
it in the brain with a wooden stick.

227
00:12:29,707 --> 00:12:32,751
Everyone in this
room loves you.

228
00:12:32,836 --> 00:12:36,171
But mark my words, we are not going
to support your alcoholism anymore.

229
00:12:36,256 --> 00:12:38,590
The next time you light
yourself on fire,

230
00:12:38,675 --> 00:12:41,218
we are not going to
help put you out.

231
00:12:41,678 --> 00:12:44,763
Oh, as fire marshal,
I would have to.

232
00:12:44,848 --> 00:12:46,306
Dwight.
She is a hazard

233
00:12:46,433 --> 00:12:49,017
to the other people of the office.
Okay.
234
00:12:49,102 --> 00:12:52,729
I suppose I could do it if it was a
controlled burn in a well-ventilated area.

235
00:12:52,814 --> 00:12:54,523
Yeah, but you're going
to need a permit for that.

236
00:12:54,607 --> 00:12:56,442
Right. That'll take
a couple weeks.

237
00:12:56,526 --> 00:12:57,693
I can get you one
in an hour.

238
00:12:57,777 --> 00:13:00,654
Really? Okay, you
know, this is over.

239
00:13:00,738 --> 00:13:01,780
I agree.

240
00:13:01,865 --> 00:13:05,284
I think you did the best you could,
but this is bigger than all of us.

241
00:13:05,368 --> 00:13:10,330
Enabler, enabler, enabler,
enabler, enabler, enabler.

242
00:13:10,415 --> 00:13:12,624
It's Christmas, and we
are turning our back

243
00:13:12,709 --> 00:13:15,252
on somebody who is
asking for help.

244
00:13:15,336 --> 00:13:17,504
You know what the only thing
I want for Christmas?

245
00:13:17,589 --> 00:13:21,133
I want Meredith to get better.
That's my only wish.
246
00:13:21,217 --> 00:13:22,718
But you know what?
My wishes never come true.

247
00:13:22,802 --> 00:13:24,761
So I'm not going to
wish that on her.

248
00:13:24,846 --> 00:13:26,930
A watch would be nice.

249
00:13:31,728 --> 00:13:33,145
They've been in there
for 45 minutes.

250
00:13:33,229 --> 00:13:34,313
I know.

251
00:13:34,397 --> 00:13:36,982
If she wasn't an alcoholic
before, she is now.

252
00:13:38,568 --> 00:13:40,319
That's a halwa
shebakia cookie.

253
00:13:40,403 --> 00:13:42,362
They serve it
during Ramadan.

254
00:13:42,447 --> 00:13:46,158
Mmm. Chewy.

255
00:13:54,125 --> 00:13:55,209
Hey.

256
00:13:58,755 --> 00:14:00,756
What's up?
Do you take requests?

257
00:14:00,882 --> 00:14:02,299
Sure.
Please stop,

258
00:14:02,383 --> 00:14:05,093
because we're having
a Christmas party.

259
00:14:21,611 --> 00:14:23,612
I'll be down in a minute.

260
00:14:27,784 --> 00:14:29,701
Could you write
down the number

261
00:14:29,786 --> 00:14:32,454
of that rehabilitation
center that you mentioned?

262
00:14:32,539 --> 00:14:34,414
Sure. Wow.

263
00:14:40,922 --> 00:14:42,256
Ow!

264
00:14:48,930 --> 00:14:50,222
We just missed
Poor Richard's.

265
00:14:50,306 --> 00:14:51,348
We did?
Yeah.

266
00:14:51,474 --> 00:14:53,350
I thought we were going out for a drink.
Oh, shoot.

267
00:14:53,434 --> 00:14:57,563
Oh, well, we'll have to go
someplace else, then, I guess.

268
00:14:57,647 --> 00:14:58,689
The Bog.

269
00:14:58,773 --> 00:15:00,107
Yeah.
Cooper's.

270
00:15:00,191 --> 00:15:01,567
We could go there.
Kelly's.

271
00:15:01,651 --> 00:15:03,068
Sure.
Brixx's.

272
00:15:03,152 --> 00:15:04,486
Yes. Yes.
Carmen's.

273
00:15:04,571 --> 00:15:06,863
Fort, Andy Gavin's.
I have a new place.

274
00:15:07,991 --> 00:15:09,408
It must have
just opened up.

275
00:15:09,492 --> 00:15:11,243
Yeah, recently.

276
00:15:11,327 --> 00:15:13,495
Yeah. All right.
All right.

277
00:15:14,539 --> 00:15:16,331
All right, enough
of this Christmas crap.

278
00:15:16,416 --> 00:15:18,500
Let's just get some
party music. Yeah!

279
00:15:18,668 --> 00:15:20,294
Yeah, there you go.

280
00:15:20,378 --> 00:15:21,587
Yeah!

281
00:15:21,671 --> 00:15:22,629
That's good.

282
00:15:22,714 --> 00:15:25,173
Yeah, that's better.
Party girl.

283
00:15:25,842 --> 00:15:27,426
Hey, Sasha, it's Daddy.
284
00:15:27,510 --> 00:15:30,929
Have you ever heard of
this doll Princess Unicorn?

285
00:15:31,014 --> 00:15:34,099
Daddy, Daddy, Daddy...
Nope, no, no.

286
00:15:34,183 --> 00:15:37,311
No. I'm just curious
if you heard of it.

287
00:15:37,687 --> 00:15:41,523
This is great. My ex-wife's
going to be so pissed.

288
00:15:42,692 --> 00:15:45,694
For once,
Daddy's going to be a hero.

289
00:15:48,865 --> 00:15:50,490
$200.
Yep.

290
00:15:51,492 --> 00:15:53,910
Hey, I'd like to buy
one of your dolls.

291
00:15:53,995 --> 00:15:55,621
Oh, that's my last one.

292
00:15:55,705 --> 00:15:57,247
Oh, no.

293
00:15:58,333 --> 00:16:00,500
No, no. I was going
to buy that doll.

294
00:16:00,585 --> 00:16:01,710
Thanks, man.

295
00:16:01,794 --> 00:16:03,670
I was going to
get the doll.

296
00:16:05,131 --> 00:16:07,341
Not my problem.
But I...

297
00:16:07,425 --> 00:16:10,260
I promised my daughter.
Darryl, look, hey...

298
00:16:11,763 --> 00:16:14,056
I need the doll.
I need the doll.

299
00:16:14,140 --> 00:16:16,308
I'm begging you.
I just...

300
00:16:16,392 --> 00:16:19,728
I need it more than anything in the world.
I need this doll.

301
00:16:20,605 --> 00:16:21,980
Darryl, man,
I need this doll.

302
00:16:22,065 --> 00:16:25,233
Okay, all right, man.
Don't cry. It's cool.

303
00:16:27,403 --> 00:16:29,571
I'll let you
get it for $400.

304
00:16:30,281 --> 00:16:32,157
I only have two.

305
00:16:32,241 --> 00:16:34,034
You can owe me.

306
00:16:34,118 --> 00:16:36,578
Oh, man. Thanks. Thanks.

307
00:16:40,875 --> 00:16:44,711
Thank you. I know, right?
Merry Christmas.

308
00:16:44,796 --> 00:16:47,214
Oh, thanks.
She's going to...
309
00:16:47,298 --> 00:16:48,632
Oh.

310
00:16:50,510 --> 00:16:52,761
Something wrong
with the doll?

311
00:16:53,638 --> 00:16:55,097
No, it's...

312
00:16:56,557 --> 00:16:59,768
It's even better
than the one I wanted.

313
00:17:07,318 --> 00:17:10,862
Sunrise Rehab? No! No!

314
00:17:10,947 --> 00:17:12,781
No! I told you no!
Yes.

315
00:17:12,865 --> 00:17:14,866
There is no way!
No. It's okay.

316
00:17:14,951 --> 00:17:16,243
It's all right.
No way! There is no way!

317
00:17:16,327 --> 00:17:18,161
Meredith, we're doing this
for your own good.

318
00:17:18,246 --> 00:17:20,038
Okay, come on.
No way!

319
00:17:20,123 --> 00:17:22,082
There is no way! Here we go.
This is going to be good.

320
00:17:22,166 --> 00:17:23,750
It's going to be...
No way! I told you.

321
00:17:23,835 --> 00:17:24,876
We talked about this!

322
00:17:24,961 --> 00:17:26,378
Open the door. There
is absolutely no way!

323
00:17:26,462 --> 00:17:27,838
Here we go.
No, no way!

324
00:17:27,922 --> 00:17:29,798
No! There is no way! No!

325
00:17:29,882 --> 00:17:31,842
No! I am not going in there!
All right. Here we go.

326
00:17:31,968 --> 00:17:33,093
Yes, you are.
I am not going in there!

327
00:17:33,136 --> 00:17:34,344
Yes, you are!

328
00:17:34,429 --> 00:17:36,138
Wait a minute,
wait a minute, wait a minute,

329
00:17:36,222 --> 00:17:39,141
wait a minute, wait a minute.
Wait a minute.

330
00:17:39,267 --> 00:17:41,393
Wait a minute. Wait a minute. Just wait.
Calm down, calm down.

331
00:17:42,645 --> 00:17:45,188
Oh, my God!
Oh, my God!

332
00:17:46,315 --> 00:17:47,816
No! No!

333
00:17:50,695 --> 00:17:52,571
Come on!
No! No!
334
00:17:52,655 --> 00:17:53,739
There is no way!
Here we go.

335
00:17:53,823 --> 00:17:54,906
There is no way!
Almost at the door.

336
00:17:54,991 --> 00:17:56,408
Here's the door. There is no way!
There is no way!

337
00:17:56,492 --> 00:17:58,577
No! No!
Let's start meeting...

338
00:17:58,661 --> 00:17:59,953
No!
Hello.

339
00:18:00,037 --> 00:18:01,496
This man is crazy!
How are you?

340
00:18:01,622 --> 00:18:02,748
This man is crazy!
Can I help you?

341
00:18:02,832 --> 00:18:05,292
I have a deposit, alcoholic.
No! No! No!

342
00:18:05,376 --> 00:18:08,170
So do I sign?
No!

343
00:18:08,796 --> 00:18:11,214
I need you to put the
Christmas tree back up.

344
00:18:11,299 --> 00:18:12,424
It's outside.

345
00:18:12,508 --> 00:18:13,550
I didn't ask you
where it was.
346
00:18:13,634 --> 00:18:16,136
I told you where
it needs to be.

347
00:18:16,846 --> 00:18:18,388
Shut up.

348
00:18:18,473 --> 00:18:19,681
Excuse me?

349
00:18:20,266 --> 00:18:22,434
I'm not moving the tree.
Face it.

350
00:18:22,518 --> 00:18:23,977
The only power
you have over me

351
00:18:24,061 --> 00:18:27,105
is this little secret that I
know you're not going to tell.

352
00:18:27,190 --> 00:18:28,565
Oh, and you want
to know how I know that?

353
00:18:28,649 --> 00:18:32,152
Because then you won't be able to plan
your stupid, tacky parties anymore.

354
00:18:32,236 --> 00:18:34,029
So you move the tree.

355
00:18:41,204 --> 00:18:42,287
Okay.

356
00:18:48,961 --> 00:18:51,296
Angela's having sex
with Dwight.

357
00:18:55,134 --> 00:18:58,512
I caught them doing it
after Toby's going-away party.

358
00:19:03,768 --> 00:19:06,019
Well, don't look
so surprised.

359
00:19:07,563 --> 00:19:09,147
I knew it.
You did not know it.

360
00:19:09,232 --> 00:19:11,858
I knew some of it.
Everyone knew some of it.

361
00:19:12,401 --> 00:19:13,902
It's Christmas.

362
00:19:14,695 --> 00:19:16,780
You knew it.
Thank you.

363
00:19:16,864 --> 00:19:18,824
I knew it.
She knew it.

364
00:19:20,201 --> 00:19:23,745
As it turns out, you can't just check
someone into rehab against their will.

365
00:19:23,830 --> 00:19:26,122
They have to
do it voluntarily.

366
00:19:26,791 --> 00:19:28,875
They have to hit rock bottom.

367
00:19:28,960 --> 00:19:31,419
So I think I know what I
need to do at this point.

368
00:19:31,504 --> 00:19:36,258
I need to find ways to push
Meredith to the bottom.

369
00:19:36,759 --> 00:19:41,638
Um, I think I can do it.
I did it with Jan.

370
00:19:44,183 --> 00:19:46,726
All right, everybody's
still here, perfect!

371
00:19:46,811 --> 00:19:49,271
I've got a little surprise
I've been working on.

372
00:19:49,355 --> 00:19:52,357
Angela, my bride,
I just wanted you to know

373
00:19:52,441 --> 00:19:57,237
that for the rest of our lives,
no matter the cultural milieu,

374
00:19:57,780 --> 00:20:02,701
I will always be there to bring
you some Christmas cheer.

375
00:20:02,785 --> 00:20:07,330
Deck the halls with boughs of
holly Fa la la la la, la la la la

376
00:20:07,623 --> 00:20:12,627
'Tis the season to be jolly
Fa la la la la, la la la la

377
00:20:12,837 --> 00:20:17,632
Don we now our gay apparel
Fa la la, la la la

378
00:20:18,301 --> 00:20:22,637
Troll the little
old yuletide carol

379
00:20:36,944 --> 00:20:39,237
I think I'd like to
go home now.

380
00:20:39,322 --> 00:20:40,447
Sure.

381
00:20:43,784 --> 00:20:45,243
Tough room.

382
00:20:46,495 --> 00:20:48,538
Come on,
I just learned it.
383
00:20:48,623 --> 00:20:51,750
Just so you know, protocol is a
little round of applause, but...

384
00:20:51,834 --> 00:20:55,962
"Merry Christmas to all
and to all a good night."