The Box Study

I sat silently in a small space of concrete floor that I called my home. A small
window in the top right corner of my glass box brought in the first rays of sunlight. A
beautiful array of bright colors painted the morning sky. I studied them, trying to ignore the
hint of nervousness in the pit of my stomach.
“Today,” I sighed to myself and leaned back against the cold glass, “everything will
be different today.”
Amaya, the thirteen year old girl in the box next to mine, tried to correct me, “today,
you’ll leave me. You’ll move on, forget about me, and-.”
I rested my head on my hands and answered her quietly, “don’t get ahead of yourself,
what if I don’t pass the test?”
She tries to test me again, “they won’t put you back in here if you don't pass they’ll
kill you! You’re like a lamb off to slaughter you know.”
I answered her sharply, not wanting to have this conversation again, “they’re not
going to kill me Amaya. They have to be doing this for a reason. I’m sure the wait will be
worth it.”
“So you’re just going to sit here and hope they have a reason? Am I the only one who
thinks this is wrong?” She asked openly. Silence filled the empty space around us, I only
nodded my head.
Later on that evening, I watched impatiently as a short, older caretaker approached
my box. “Delta Ashter?” she asked, looking down at her sizable clipboard.
“That’s me!” I exclaimed, sounding more enthusiastic than I really felt. I shifted my
weight to my legs as I stood up from my cot. My stomach churned and my palms became
sweaty, forcing me to wipe them on my pants.
She looked up from the papers in front of her and asked, “are you ready for the
exam?” I nodded and watched as she connected the key card to the sensor, opening the glass
door. As I stepped out of the box, a gust of cold air surrounded my skin, leaving goosebumps
all down my arms. She led me down a few sets of hallways and into a gray room filled with
old computers. My body began to feel numb as more and more worried thoughts rushed
through my head.
After sitting through forty-five endless questions, I found myself in a waiting room,
anxiously waiting for the test results. My eyes darted between my shoes and the door. The
only thing that separated me from the test results was that thin gray door. The lights that
barely lit up the room buzzed and flickered. My legs bounced impatiently, producing a
consistent squeaking sound from the chair beneath me.
My eyes shot up from the pale tiles under my feet as I heard the door open. The
caretaker finally came out with a large man at her side. My whole body shook.
“Delta, I-” Her voice trailed off and every piece of hope that I had inside of me started
to crack and fall apart. She finally continued, “I- I am so sorry sweetie. You didn’t pass.” My
body went limp and my head buzzed.
“No, no- I couldn’t have! Check it again!” The man took a step towards me and
reached his hands out to grab a hold of me, my legs steadied as adrenaline pumped through
them, “Get away from me! No! Stop!” I screeched as I began to thrash my arms and legs.
The memory of Amayas voice rang in my ears, “they are going to kill you”. I made contact
with the man's side and he let out a groan. His hand squeezed tighter around my small
forearm and I began to hit it furiously. He tugged at my arm and I slid closer to him. I hit him
again, this time in the knee. As he stumbled away from me, he managed to swing his other
arm around his body and made contact with my shoulder. Heat filled the area and my
muscles ached. My eyes shifted towards the caretaker who watched in shock as the scene
played out. Everything happened in a blur, but for the first time, I had one clear thought: run.
My legs started moving under my body and I found myself running straight for the door. The
pain in my shoulder grew as I ran and my body felt like it would collapse at any second.
By the time my mind had caught up to my already moving body, I had ripped open
the door at the opposite end of the room. I continued to run through a series of hallways until
I reached one last door. Bright rays of sunlight blinded me, and for the first time in my entire
life, I was looking at the outside world. Large buildings towered over the streets that came
alive with people and cars. A sparkling river stretched out and curved around the edge of the
skyline in the distance. Everything was so perfect, so clear. I shook my head to regain focus,
waiting for another guard to burst through the door at any second. My legs moved
rhythmically, pounding the pavement as I moved toward the edge of a nearby forest. I dared
to glance back at the doorway, only to see the large man beginning to chase after me. I
moved faster than I ever knew I could. The sound of birds in the sky and trees rustling in the
woods surrounded me and the fresh scent of the forest tugged at my nose. No matter how
much I wanted to stand and stare at the beauty of this unfamiliar world, I couldn’t stop
running.
I kept moving until I could barely breathe. I finally fell to the ground in the middle of
the woods, lost and alone. I let out a gasp for air. My whole body ached and my chest rose
and fell heavily, trying to breathe in more air than my lungs could fit. I laid on the ground in
the middle of the woods until for what felt like eternity, too scared to sleep yet too exhausted
to move. Suddenly a rustle came from the dark woods behind me. I jumped up from my spot
on the ground and tried to take off in the opposite direction, only to strike something solid.
The entire left side of my body screamed in pain from the impact. I laid on the rough ground,
once again, waiting to look up and see a large man standing over me.
Instead, a girl, around my age, sat in front of me, frozen. Her entire body sat still in a
motionless daze like she wasn’t even real. It wasn’t until I saw her face that I became
paralyzed too. The girl looked exactly like me as if I was looking in a mirror. My body felt
like it was cemented to the ground, I wanted to move, to run, but all I could do was stare at
the girl in front of me. She looked back at me with an equal amount of confusion. I slowly
found a way to my feet, inching closer to the mysterious girl. She mirrored my movements
exactly.
Suddenly, everything stopped. The sound of leaves rustling and the motion of her eyes
on my face froze. The breeze halted, and everything fell silent. The sound of a machine
whirring filled my ears. Uncertainty clouded my thoughts as I waited for myself to wake up,
like I was having a bad dream. I blinked a few times, as if I was coming from deep sleep,
except it all seemed too real. I wasn’t in my cot, I was strapped to a table in a dark room. My
vision cleared enough to allow me to see the tubes and wires sticking to my body.
 “Hello? Is anybody there?” I half shouted, half croaked into the open space. My mind
broke down all at once. Everything happened so quickly. Nothing was clear. I was once again
completely alone and confused.
“Delta,” a sharp voice cut through the silence of the factory like a knife. My eyes
opened quickly and fell upon a tall woman standing in front of me. Her piercing eyes stared
into mine and a smile curled onto her red lips. She was dressed in a black and white pantsuit
with tall heels. There was not a hair on her head out of place nor a single wrinkle on her
perfectly pressed clothes.
“What is happening?” I hesitantly asked again.
She opened her mouth and closed it again. Like she was unsure where to begin. She
finally spoke: “thank you for your participation”. The confused look failed to fall from my
face. She continued, “We have placed you into an advanced study where you are to live
through multiple different scenarios to see which will be most successful. You, specifically,
are from the Box Study, the one you lived through. Hundreds of others just like you are going
through variations of the same environment. You, and the other girl you saw, found a
loophole, and saw each other, causing a breakdown in the system. She is from another
variation of your environment.” My head pounds. She was lying. She had to be. I wanted to
laugh at the absurd words falling from her lips.
“So this is what happens when you fail the test. They convince you that you are
crazy?” I push back at her insanity.
“Delta, you are so brave. I know this is a little much for you, but you dedicated your
life to all future generations! Your contributions are a gift to society!” She talked calmly like
she had done this thousands of times before.
A deeper voice came from the darkness behind the woman, “Should we send her back
through?” She stood there unphased.
Looking me up and down with disappointment she finally answered, “Put her under”.
My heart dropped as I shifted again in the restraints. I watched as a bright blue liquid
pushed towards me through one of the tubes. A burning sensation filled my veins as the
liquid began surging through my body. A familiar cloudiness grabbed at the corners of my
vision. My head grew heavy and my eyes closed.
I let out a groan as I opened my eyes once again. There I was, in a cot, in a glass box,
on my sixteenth birthday.