[Chorus]

F C G C
Oh, things couldn't be worse
F C G C
When your parents run the universe
F C G Am
Oh, things couldn’t be worse
F C G C
When your folks run the universe

[LUKE]
F C
My dad is Hermes
G C
He messengers things
F C G C
You'll know his sign by his shoes with those wings
F C G A
I'd wait by the phone but the phone never rings
F
Oh no
F C G Am
When your dad's a god, life can be tough
F* G C
I met the guy once and once was enough
C
[LUKE] (Spoken) Annabeth?

[ANNABETH]
F C
My mom is Athena
G C
She’s smart and she’s wise
F C G C
She’s sworn off gluten and she’s sworn off guys
F C G Am
If she came to Camp, it’d be a surprise
F
Oh no
F C G Am
Oh, and my step-mom, she hates me, and my dad works all day
F* G
So I left Virginia and I ran away

[Chorus]
F C G C
Oh, things couldn't be worse

F C G
When your parents run the universe
F C G Am
Oh, things couldn’t be worse
F C G C
When your folks run the universe
C
[LUKE] (Spoken) Alright, who’s next?
C
[KATIE] Oh! Okay, let me see…
[KATIE]
F C
My mom’s Demeter
G C
Goddess of grain
F C G C
She gets excited when it starts to rain
F C G Am
But planting and planting and planting’s a pain
F
Oh no
F C G Am
For their sixteenth birthday, my friends got a car
F* G C
I got a fern in some dumb mason jar

[GROVER] (Spoken) Ooh, ooh! My turn!

F C

I’m a child of Pan

G C
The god of the wild
F C G
For those who love nature, they’re often beguiled
F C G Am
He’s not really my dad, but I’m sort of his chil
F
Oh no

F C G Am
He went for a hike to explore new frontiers
F* G
And no one has seen him for thousands of years

[Chorus]
F C G C
Oh, things couldn't be worse
F C G
When your parents run the universe
F C G Am
Oh, things couldn’t be worse
F C G C
When your folks run the universe

C
[PERCY] (Spoken) Chiron! Who’s your dad? [CHIRON] Oh, well…

[CHIRON]
F* C*
My father is Kronos
F* C*
Remember my lecture?
G* C*
He ate his children

[LUKE] (Spoken) Chiron wins… How about you, Silena?

[SILENA]
F C
The goddess of love
G C
My mom’s Aphrodite
F C G C
She tries to be cool, but mainly she’s flighty
F C G Am
I’ll bring home a boy, and she’s there in her nighty

F
[CAMPERS] Oh no

F C G Am
I tried to seek help from even the Fates

F* G
‘Cause she steals my mascara and all of my dates

C
[LUKE] (Spoken) Alright, Percy, it’s your turn
C
[PERCY] If I try to sing, it’ll probably cause an avalanche
C
[LUKE] We’re all friends here. Come on, give it a shot.
C
[PERCY] Okay. Um…

[PERCY]
F* C*
My mom was named Sally
G* C*
She loved scary movies
F* C*
And food that was blue and…

C
[KATIE] (Spoken) He’s doing it wrong
C
[SILENA] Yeah, who’s your godly parent?
C
[PERCY] Oh, I don’t know
C
[LUKE] It’s alright. A lot of half-bloods never know their godly parent. Just give
it a try.

[PERCY]
F* C
So, my dad is some go
G* C*
That’s great, I guess
F* C* G* C*
Did he not want me, or not want the stress?
F* C* G* Am*
Too bad he’s the worst and my life is a mess
F
Oh no
F C G Am
I hope that he shows even a trace
F* G C
‘Cause I’ve got some choice words to throw in his face!

[Chorus]

F C G C
Oh, things couldn't be worse
F C G C
When your parents run the universe
F C G Am
Oh, things couldn’t be worse

[LUKE]

C G
But I don't care where our parents may be
Am F
As long as you are here with me

[ALL CAMPERS]

C G
We don't care where our parents may be
Am F

As long as you are here with me

C G F C
As long as you are here with me!