HL essay example A: examiner‘s comments coversheet

HL essay examiner’s comments coversheet

Subject name: English A: language and literature

Sample name: Example A

Question
How and why does Watterson satirize the conventional education system?

Criterion A Mark: 4/5

Examiner’s comments:
The candidate has a clear enough understanding of how the comic strip Calvin and Hobbes works in
general across a larger body of work. The essay considered three sets of panels related to the subject of
education. There is an appropriate line of enquiry—the phrasing of the question “How and why” invited a
clear line of development and led the candidate to provide relevant examples, well chosen to support the
ideas.

Criterion B Mark: 4/5

Examiner’s comments:
Aspects of the graphic elements were detailed and the analysis well developed. There was also some
consideration of the language, although this was more limited, for example the candidate does refer to
elements of the dialogue on page 5 of the essay. There is a good sense of the broad theme of education
and the satirical nature of the comic strip as a whole.

Criterion C Mark: 4/5

Examiner’s comments:
There is development of the line of enquiry and some attempt at complex organization, which is mostly
successful. Supporting examples are well integrated into the essay. Overall, there is a clear cohesion to the
argument.

Criterion D Mark: 4/5

Examiner’s comments:
This essay is largely expressed in clear language with some minor errors. The use of literary terms and
register is largely consistent and appropriate. There are one or two clumsy expressions and at times the
vocabulary choices could have been more wide-ranging.

General commentary
The candidate has chosen to use bold to highlight the example of literary techniques. This does not
influence the awarding of marks positively or negatively. The inclusion of the comic strips in an appendix
was helpful, although placing them in the main body would have been more effective.

Language A: language and literature assessed student work 1