1.what Is Spiritually Centered Confidence - ProductiveMuslim - Com %

1/26/22, 8:44 AM What Is Spiritually Centered Confidence? - ProductiveMuslim.
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What Is Spiritually Centered

Confidence?
Hafsah Adham, Thu 20 Rajab 1442AH 4-3-2021AD Company News Spiritual Productivity
13 minutes
Take the Confidence Quiz
https://productivemuslim.com/spiritually-centered-confidence/ 1/23
1/26/22, 8:44 AM What Is Spiritually Centered Confidence? - ProductiveMuslim.com %
As habit dictates, she sits comfortably in her chair, sips her coffee, and opens
her email to see what today will bring. She instantly regrets looking at her
internal mail first. Glaring at the top of her screen is an email from her boss. She
hesitantly opens it, unconsciously moving her chair a little away from the desk
as though that would help soften the blow somehow.
She stares at her proposal, the one she had spent days carefully crafting, that is
now littered with comments and changes he wants to be made. As she skims
through his notes, she feels like it’s not just her proposal in question, but herself
as a person and her ability to do the job she was hired for. She feels instantly
ashamed, irritated, and wrongly accused.
Impulsively, she hits reply and without hesitation lets her boss know why she
made the choices she did. She presses send and feels in some way
vindicated.
However, as the rest of the day transpires, his words weigh heavier and heavier
in her mind. Self-doubt and the harsh inner critic are hijacking her mind making
it harder for her to perform at work. She’s constantly second-guessing her
decisions and wondering at what point she’ll get pulled up again. At the end of
the day, she leaves with tense shoulders and a headache, summoning
whatever energy she has to face her other roles of being a mother, wife, and
home carer. In her heart, she already knows it’s going to be a tough evening as
she’s feeling exhausted and defeated before even stepping out of the office.
She sighs sadly, knowing her family won’t get the best of her, again.
Sana came to me because she was exhausted from being in this cycle. She felt
she was on an emotional rollercoaster, feeling confident and great one
minute but then deflated and riddled with self-doubt the next. She felt she
lacked balance and was spiritually compromised. She had little to no energy
and was worn out by the mental marathons she would run in her head with the
constant comparisons and second-guessing her decisions and performance.
She felt she was on an emotional

rollercoaster, feeling confident
and great one minute but then
deflated and riddled with self-
doubt the next
Hafsah Adham
As we began our very first session, “Breathe” I said to her, “Take a few deep
breaths and let’s slow down”.
As Sana and I worked together, she began to discover a new way of defining
confidence allowing her to experience a new level of emotional stability, inner
peace, and fulfillment in a more consistent way.
Why Confidence Matters?

In today’s world, there are many definitions of confidence and it’s become a
highly sought-after attribute. After all, confidence has become the gold standard
in the workplace because we’re told that’s what we need to get noticed, get
ahead, and achieve all our life ambitions. Nowadays, the self-help world offers
you a whole array of quick-fix strategies and formulas to help fill up your
confidence tank.
The reality is that we do need confidence as it plays a critical role in how you
see yourself and in how you behave. It can improve your relationship with family
and friends, job performance, your involvement in the community, and your
ability to achieve from your smallest to biggest ambitions in life.
One of the most cited sources about self-confidence in the modern context
refers to it as simply believing in oneself. As believers, this notion of believing
in oneself is important but it comes with a caveat. We need to be extremely
careful about where our confidence is coming from in each moment and what
it’s pulling us towards in terms of our beliefs, character, and behavior.
Attaching confidence to what we

do as opposed to who we are,
creates a need to chase and
focus on the external and neglect
what’s within.
Hafsah Adham
It’s very tempting to build our confidence and construct our lives based on what
we own and what we do. We can feel good about our physical appearance,
how we performed at work, what the boss said, how much money is in the bank
or even upon the degree by which we are socially accepted by others. These
are all external forms of validation that are very temporary in nature. Attaching
confidence to what we do as opposed to who we are, creates a need to
chase and focus on the external and neglect what’s within. We become
distracted from paying attention to what Allah sees.
The Messenger of Allah (SAW) said, “Verily, Allah does not

look at your appearance or wealth, but rather He looks at
your hearts and actions.”
(Sahih Muslim)
It is my hope that by the end of this article you will be able to distinguish the
many different modalities of confidence ranging from healthy and spiritually
enriching to others that are temporary in nature, toxic and serve only to inflate
the ego, detracting from our spiritual wellbeing and our relationship with Allah.
How I came to understand Islamically

rooted confidence
You would never have guessed I suffered from low confidence or a paralyzing
fear of public speaking. Why? Because I was great at masking it. I was like a
chameleon, adapting to everything around me, and somewhere along the line, I
lost my identity. I was a people-pleaser, a giver, a high-achiever who raced to
serve every person’s needs—often to my detriment. Doing this left me burnt
out, unfulfilled and exhausted. I was tired of the emotional rollercoaster of
needing others to validate me and boost my confidence.
After years of spiritual and personal development training, I finally felt a sense
of authenticity, acceptance, and connection to my true self. It was through this
process that I realized a fundamental truth; the only way to experience
unwavering self-confidence is to ground your identity, efforts, and focus on your

faith in Allah.
I realized a fundamental truth; the

only way to experience
unwavering self-confidence is to
ground your identity, efforts, and
focus on your faith in Allah.
Hafsah Adham
It was at this stage I qualified as a Life coach so that I could help prevent others
from making the same mistakes I did. By the mercy of Allah, for the past 6 years,
I’ve been researching, teaching, and coaching clients on a new framework of
confidence, one that is rooted in faith and not in ego. I have delivered lectures,
workshops and coached hundreds of people around the world helping them
make the paradigm shift from ego-led confidence to real inner confidence that
is deeply rooted in their trust and relationship with Allah (SWT).
This confidence paradigm shift entails a holistic process of deeper inner work
that’s rooted in Islamic principles. It’s designed to help us reconnect back to our
fitrah with spiritually fortified confidence and resilience that can be present in
the face of any challenging situation.
From Ego-Centered Confidence to

Spiritually Centered Confidence
It is from the Mercy of Allah, that He has given us the capability to feel deeply
rooted confidence within ourselves no matter what our external circumstances
are. This confidence is solidified on the foundations of unwavering love and
trust in Allah.
When confidence is rooted in Tawakkul (trust in Allah), it allows us to face even

the hardest tests with grace and poise as modeled by our beloved prophets
(peace be upon them). They faced undeniable hardships and struggles, yet had
absolute confidence and trust in Allah, believing and knowing that nothing can
happen to them or hurt them unless it was by Allah’s Will. With this spiritual
armor, they would leave their homes each day with purpose and intentionality
that was undeterred by outside events or other people’s words and actions.
They were comforted and fuelled by these words of Allah:
“Say: Only what Allah has decreed will happen to us. He is

Our Master: let the believers put their trust in Allah.”
(Qur’an 9:51)
Let’s examine a few distinctions to help us discern deeply rooted spiritual

confidence from the superficial temporary platforms of confidence. We will
specifically look at some of the consequences of adopting ego-led confidence
compared to possible outcomes from developing spiritually led confidence, as
detailed in the following infographic:
Self Reliance Based Confidence Vs

Tawakkul Based Confidence
Probably one of the biggest concerns with following today’s formulas for
confidence and success is that it puts us at risk of becoming forgetful of Allah.
This can be a very subtle process and happen without us even realizing if we
are not mindful.
The moment we align with the idea “it’s all on me”, we’re vulnerable to a whole
host of problems. With this mindset, the burden of success is solely on us and it
can create psychological issues such as anxiety, stress and make us very
reactive to outcomes. For example, if a person delivers a presentation and
receives negative feedback, it’s easy to take it very personally, giving way to
self-loathing, negative self-talk and people pleasing behaviour. If the
presentation received great reviews, without humility present and attributing the
outcome back to Allah, any praise could feed directly to their ego, which in turn
can create arrogance and an unhealthy disproportionate belief in oneself and
their ability.
“Do not strut arrogantly about the Earth. You will certainly
never split the earth apart nor will you ever rival the
mountains in height.”
(Qur’an 17:37)
Some of the pitfalls of arrogance to be aware of include:
Inadvertently, we may fall into the trap of thinking the only factors at play is
our own ability, effort and self-belief. This disconnects us from the reality that
we are the slaves of Allah and rather than operating from a spiritual soulful
place with purpose and humility, it sets up an identity based on ego with a
penchant for external validation.
The Prophet (SAW) said: He who has, in his heart, an ant’s weight of
arrogance will not enter Paradise. (Sahih Muslim). Islamic tradition is
about not inflating ego, this is called Jihad Un Nafs (struggle against the self)
out of protection from becoming “full of oneself” and adopting a mindset
independent of Allah.
“The shy person and the arrogant one will not learn the knowledge.”
(Sahih Bukhari). As we can see from this hadith, allowing arrogance to
enter the heart shuts the door to valuable learning and insights. There’s also
a real danger of not being able to do honest self-reflection (Muhasabah) for
personal growth and development.
We must also consider the undesirable characteristics and social behaviour

that arrogance can bring out in someone. Are they concerned with other
people’s feelings or more worried about protecting their own image?
The reality is that Allah has blessed us with skills and abilities but ultimately, we
ONLY achieve success by the mercy of Allah and because He willed it to
happen. When we align that mindset with a deep sense of knowing that along
with my ability, skills and efforts is the help and might of Allah, we can feel more
assured going into any situation with high levels of self-confidence. If we have
the help of Allah, what is there to fear?
“And He provides for him from (sources) he never could

imagine. And if anyone puts his trust in Allah, sufficient is
(Allah) for him. For Allah will surely accomplish his purpose:
verily, for all things has Allah appointed a due proportion.”
(Quran 65:3)
Grounded with this inner confidence, we have the courage to listen to others,
we can accept all outcomes and we have the capacity to entertain other
people’s opinions.
“It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without

accepting it.” – Aristotle
Essential Self Vs Constructed Self

SubhanAllah, we are the creation of Allah. Let’s just take a moment to think
about the significance of that. He designed us in perfect proportion and placed
within us unique qualities and traits so that we can use these gifts to spread
goodness and rahma (mercy) in the world.
“We have indeed created humankind in the best of moulds.”

(Quran 95:4)
Our essential self is the purest form of who we are (fitrah). This space is filled
with compassion, goodwill and esteemed qualities that reflect our most
authentic self. Our soul will feel most alive, spiritually engaged and thriving
when we are living in integrity with our essential self.
But sometimes, in the process of trying to succeed in our environment, we can

detach from our authentic self and become people that neither others nor even
ourselves recognise. Here are some ways we can detach and fall into our
constructed self:
We try to follow formulas of other successful people and don’t honour who
we really are at a soul level. We lose our authenticity, afraid to show up as
our real self out of fear of loss, judgement or rejection.
We believe negative things that have been said about us in the past and
build an entire life as a reaction to this.
We become chameleon-like to fit in with others and our environment, this

creates a gap between how we feel on the inside and how we show up on
the outside. The larger the gap, the greater the inner friction and
disturbance at a soul level.
Reactive behaviour tends to have a few common traits; sensitive, protective

and defensive.
Reactive ego-led behaviour can easily masquerade as confidence, when we

quip back if pressed or “fight our corner” during every conflict, we convince
ourselves that we’re coming from a place of strength, but in fact it could be
the protective armour we’ve created in order not to feel any discomfort.
“… By the soul and (by) Him who made it perfect, and then
inspired it to understand what is wrong and what is right for
it. Truly is successful the one who purifies (his soul).”
(Qur’an 91:7-9)
As we learn from this ayah, the soul knows right from wrong. If we learn to slow
down and pay attention to that quiet inner voice we will see that real courage
and confidence is in showing restraint, being kind, showing mercy and carefully
crafting responses with an awareness and care of how our behaviour affects
others.
Self Care Vs Self Neglect

Busy lifestyles and hustle culture can very quickly lead to self-neglect. This can
have a cascading negative impact on multiple fronts (e.g. spiritual and
emotional wellbeing, energy and confidence levels)
Sometimes in the rush of modern life, many people forgo a healthy diet. A poor
diet not only affects our weight, but it can affect our mood and emotions. When
our emotions are not healthy this can directly impact our confidence. For
example, researchers are finding fascinating links between our food choices
and mental health.
“Serotonin is a neurotransmitter that helps regulate sleep and appetite, mediate

moods, and inhibit pain. Since about 95% of your serotonin is produced in your
gastrointestinal tract, and your gastrointestinal tract is lined with a hundred
million nerve cells, or neurons, it makes sense that the inner workings of your
digestive system don’t just help you digest food, but also guide your emotions.”
(Harvard Medical School).
There are countless references in the Quran and sunnah with regards to how
we should manage our eating habits as food not only nourishes our body but
the soul too.
The correlation between lifestyle choices and our emotional state extends to
almost every aspect of our life. Some of the impacts of self-neglect include:
If we’re run down, overworked and feel under-valued, it won’t be long

before we’re battered from exhaustion and begin to operate in a mental fog
which makes it difficult to move forward with even our basic daily activities.
Recharging is critical. If we don’t, we’ll be running on empty. We may still be

able to serve others – but would they be getting the best of us? What’s the
trade off? Poor choices around food, excess weight gain/loss, dark circles
under the eyes, short fuse, health issues?
How confident can we truly feel if our body is consistently getting

insufficient sleep?
Research shows that low energy gravitates us towards negative emotions

such as resentment, frustration and even anger. If all our actions are judged
by our intentions, we have to question how these negative emotions impact
our intentions, even when we are serving our loved ones! Part of our duty as
Muslims is to explore our intentions at deeper levels.
Your body has a right over you and we have to make choices accordingly. Allah
blessed us with ONE body and gave it to us as an amaanah (trust) that we will
look after it, with this intention self-care becomes an act of worship.
Ibn al-Qayyim (r) stated:
“Health is one of the most precious favours Allah has

bestowed upon His servants, the most generous of gifts, the
most plentiful of His bounties. Rather, even more, [good]
health is the most precious of favours without exception; so
it is fitting that whoever is granted a portion of this fortune,
that he cherishes it, preserves it and guards it against harm.”
A defining characteristic of a Muslim is loving and following the Sunnah. The

best of mankind has instructed us to be mindful of our mind and body. Part of
striving to follow our prophet (saw) in order to please Allah is through loving and
taking care of yourself.
He ate well, he slept early, he was active, he gave himself rest and fulfilled the
rights of his body.
From this, we can see self-care is not just a luxury but a necessity.
Ultimately…
From the above we see that true confidence is rooted in Islamic principles. It
requires us to take care of ourselves, to identify the true self and ultimately to
rely on Allah. It is only through our relationship and awareness of Allah that our
hearts can find peace as Allah tells us:
“Only in remembrance of Allah (swt) will your heart find

peace”
(Qur’an 13:28)
If our confidence is independent of this reality, we may develop a scarcity

mindset and seek abundance through wealth and status. We can lose a good
night’s sleep worrying about our possessions and unfulfilled life ambitions.
Everything becomes personal and we become very reactive to our
circumstances. We may lose aspects of our character and become neglectful of
our spiritual obligations, manners and empathy for others in the process.
It’s important to note that striving for the good of this world and having high
ambitions is not inherently wrong, in fact we are advised to make duaa for it:
“Our Lord, give us in this world [that which is] good and in
the Hereafter [that which is] good and protect us from the
punishment of the Fire.”
(Qur’an 2:201)
We ask for the good of this world, but we don’t attach our hearts to it. In hope of
being included as those who are truly successful (Al-Muflihoon) we strive to
make our efforts count for us in this world and the next InshaAllah.
Aligning with this intention, means that we can aim high fearlessly with full trust
that Allah will give us what is best and what we don’t receive in this world will,
InshaAllah, be waiting to greet us in the next world. This spiritually rooted
confidence liberates us from the shackles of chasing dunya and striving to fulfil
society’s demands.
It’s in renewing our intentions and aligning our thoughts, decisions and actions
with our higher purpose and finding our way back to our essential self that we
can experience that rich, unwavering belief, knowledge and understanding that
Allah’s help is near.
Back to Sana’s case

Sana and I used the Belief model ™ to help raise her self-awareness and
spiritually align her mind, body and soul with a more purposeful and intentional
life.
She fully embraced the instruction in these comforting words from Allah:
“Allah never changes the condition of a people unless they

strive to change themselves.”
(Quran 13:11)
She recognised that if she wanted to see change in her life, the point of action
had to begin with herself first along with full trust that Allah, Al- Fattah (The
Opener) will open the way for everything else to change.
By working through the Belief model ™, here’s a few of the changes she
experienced with the Mercy of Allah:
She learned to slow down, re-evaluate her life goals and worked on getting
to know her true self.
She deepened her relationship with Allah and as a result felt less fear
around other people and outcomes.
She developed more courage to take personal accountability for her

thoughts, choices, feelings and responses which enabled her to experience
more spiritually rooted confidence both at work and at home. This made her
less reactive to negative feedback or criticism.
She discovered that through honest self-reflection, she could remove

invisible barriers that had been holding her back and step closer towards
living as her most authentic best self.
With new lifestyle choices, she felt less physically drained but also without
the comparisons and self-doubt occupying her mind, she had more energy
to channel toward things that really mattered to her.
Situations that would have previously been taken very personally and weigh
heavy on her mind, now presented opportunities for growth and new
learnings.
The tension in her shoulders had eased and she is now working on living
life with more presence, joy and intentionality Alhamdulilah.
Ready to build your spiritually-centered

confidence?
I’m excited to partner with The Productive Muslim Company to launch a brand
new 6-week masterclass on building spiritually-centered confidence. You can
learn more about it at barakahacademy.com/confidence/.
Click here to learn more about Confidence

Masterclass
This will be a 6-week masterclass that combines Islamic spiritual practices with
modern productivity and psychology based on the BELIEF Model ™️. Learn more
here.
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Written by
Hafsah Adham
Hafsah is the founder of The Confident Muslimah
(www.theconfidentmuslimah.com), a spiritually centered coaching service that
molds western psychology with Islamic foundations to transform professional

and personal goals to achieve success in this life and the next.
With a laser-focus on progress and action-based mentorship, individuals learn

how to step into their best version to enable them to give back, rebuild
relationships with loved ones and contribute to the wider society and truly lead
and leave a lasting legacy while attaining a deep sense of fulfillment.
Confidence coaching intertwined with the guidance from the Qur’an and
Sunnah designed to propel you to be more, do more, and give more.
Hafsah is based in the UK with her husband and 3 children. She’s an adventurer
at heart with a passion for sports. As well as being a confidence coach, she’s a
public speaker, community worker, a volunteer lecturer at a revert center, and is
an ongoing student of Islamic sciences studying under various Islamic teachers.
With years of experience in delivering talks, running workshops, and coaching

people worldwide, she has a proven ability to help others step into their best
version and rise above daily challenges with courage and gratitude.
She is most passionate about building the next generation of Muslim leaders
who - like the companions - are confident, courageous, and Jannah-focused so
they can take positive action towards their personal and professional goals with
long-lasting confidence.
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1/26/22, 8:44 AM What Is Spiritually Centered Confidence? - ProductiveMuslim.

What Is Spiritually Centered

Take the Confidence Quiz

She felt she was on an emotional

Why Confidence Matters?

Attaching confidence to what we

The Messenger of Allah (SAW) said, “Verily, Allah does not

How I came to understand Islamically

unwavering self-confidence is to ground your identity, efforts, and focus on your

I realized a fundamental truth; the

From Ego-Centered Confidence to

When confidence is rooted in Tawakkul (trust in Allah), it allows us to face even

“Say: Only what Allah has decreed will happen to us. He is

Let’s examine a few distinctions to help us discern deeply rooted spiritual

Self Reliance Based Confidence Vs

Some of the pitfalls of arrogance to be aware of include:

We must also consider the undesirable characteristics and social behaviour

“And He provides for him from (sources) he never could

“It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without

Essential Self Vs Constructed Self

“We have indeed created humankind in the best of moulds.”

But sometimes, in the process of trying to succeed in our environment, we can

We become chameleon-like to fit in with others and our environment, this

Reactive behaviour tends to have a few common traits; sensitive, protective

Reactive ego-led behaviour can easily masquerade as confidence, when we

Self Care Vs Self Neglect

“Serotonin is a neurotransmitter that helps regulate sleep and appetite, mediate

If we’re run down, overworked and feel under-valued, it won’t be long

Recharging is critical. If we don’t, we’ll be running on empty. We may still be

How confident can we truly feel if our body is consistently getting

Research shows that low energy gravitates us towards negative emotions

Ibn al-Qayyim (r) stated:

“Health is one of the most precious favours Allah has

A defining characteristic of a Muslim is loving and following the Sunnah. The

“Only in remembrance of Allah (swt) will your heart find

If our confidence is independent of this reality, we may develop a scarcity

Back to Sana’s case

“Allah never changes the condition of a people unless they

She developed more courage to take personal accountability for her

She discovered that through honest self-reflection, she could remove

Ready to build your spiritually-centered

Click here to learn more about Confidence

Subscribe to our mailing list and receive exclusive updates, training,

molds western psychology with Islamic foundations to transform professional

With a laser-focus on progress and action-based mentorship, individuals learn

With years of experience in delivering talks, running workshops, and coaching

a year ago • 3 comments 3 years ago • 4 comments 3 years

Adjusting to Barakah Culture Why

Comments Community 🔒 Privacy Policy 

 Favorite t Tweet f Share Sort by Best

Start the discussion…

OR SIGN UP WITH DISQUS ?

Be the first to comment.

Ego is the Enemy of Barakah

An experiment in the Metaverse

When Souls Meet: How to fuse Barakah into your

We tend to think of meetings as spaces where minds meet; but what if we

About Store Blog Contact

About Us Book Latest Articles Contact Us

Our Story Masterclass Free Planners FAQ

Company News Academy Videos Careers

Search Site... Search

Copyright © The Productive Muslim Company 2022