Original Conclusion:

Therefore, Albright effectively creates comparisons and ethos and presents her speech

with certain syntax to convey to women not only in the graduating class, but to women

everywhere that they should have the courage, want, and perseverance to achieve more

although society in regards to women has advanced exponentially. Albright's use of

comparisons, syntax, and evidence to produce ethos helps her support and strengthen her

message, inspiring women to work towards something they haven't achieved yet.
Revised Conclusion:

Throughout her speech, Albright inspires women to cross the desert of inequality and

obstacles in order to plant a sprout of reform, allowing them to branch out and define their own

lives. Even when women face barriers to charting their own paths and achieving inequality,

women must unite in order to grow the tree of equality and reform society's expectations on

women, leading to society addressing not only women's obstacles, but the obstacles facing all

discriminated groups, such as marriage for LGBTQ+.