https://mikemehlman.

net/2017/10/26/directapproach/

The direct approach

 
(22-minute read)
When you cold approach (meaning you’ve never seen a particular girl before), there’s two ways to go about
it:

1) Either you’re direct about why you’re approaching, and you tell her that upfront; or

2) You’re indirect by playing to the surroundings, trying to naturally develop a conversation by rolling with
your scenery.

There’s two main ways I’ll open women:

I’ll say, “Hi, I’m Michael. I thought you were attractive and wanted to say hi.”

Or, “Hi, I’m Michael. I just wanted to say hi.”

That’s it.

A man physically uses his penis to penetrate a woman, so conversation is no different.

Your most powerful weapon is your directness.

I’ve sometimes used variants of my opener, e.g., “Hi, I’m Michael. I thought you seemed
interesting and wanted to say hi.” I’ll probably say that if the air she gives off is a bit
alternative/skater-type and appealing to me. You say whatever is on your mind. But usually, I just
tell them I think they’re cute.

If she gets uncomfortable and starts to leave, don’t follow her. Let her leave. The one thing you
never ever do is follow a girl if she’s walking away.

https://www.roadtosolidity.com/how-to-approach-a-girl

Keep in mind that the most important thing you need to attract girls is your vibe. Your masculine
vibe. Not your physical beauty.

That said, there are some traps linked to your appearance that
you must avoid.
These traps might seem obvious to you, but they’re so important that I can’t not mention them.

By falling into these traps, you communicate to the girl that you have low social value.

In other words, it gets the girl to think that she might be out of your league.
And it kills the attraction that could exist between you and her.

Here are those traps:

• Bad breath:

Bad breath is repulsive.

It communicates that you have low social value.

So make sure you don’t have disgusting breath.

You must understand that smelling your own breath is hard, since you’re used to it.

So don’t hesitate to ask some of your friends to honestly tell you if you smell okay or like shit.

And if you still have bad breath despite the fact that you regularly brush your teeth, use dental floss.
It’s quite effective.

You might also want to carry chewing gum with you in case of an emergency ;).

Bad dental hygiene:

It’s quite obvious that if you have rotten teeth, you’ll be seen as a guy of low social value or a bum.

Not to mention the horrible breath…

So make sure your dental hygiene is top-notch.

Visit a dentist if you have to.

• Nose and ear hairs:

Hairs jutting out of your nose or ears communicates low social value.

A man who has an active social life will have people remarking on those hairs every day.

The good news is that you just need some tweezers or a small pair of scissors to sort this out.

 Hair:

Make sure you have a haircut that is neither repelling nor nerdy.

If you need some examples, take a look at some men’s fashion magazines. But when looking at those
magazines, always read with a critical eye, because you’ll find a lot of bullshit in them.

If you are balding and not comfortable with it, there are a number of solutions: completely shaving your
head, micro-pigmentation, hair-loss treatment, or even hair transplants (I prefer the first solution; it is
the simplest and most natural-looking).

 Clothes:

Whether you like it or not, clothes reflect your social status.

 If you dress like a bum, you’ll be seen as a bum.

If you dress like a businessman, you’ll be seen as a businessman.

Those two examples are obviously a bit extreme, but they will help you understand the impact your
look has on how people perceive you.

Keep in mind that the girl you’re going to approach has only these visual elements to use when
forming her initial opinion of you.

So make sure you dress in a way that conveys high social status.

If you need some inspiration, you can have a look at some men’s fashion blogs.

Simply put, dress like a grownup: proper and tidy, not like a teenager or a weirdo.

Well…

The traps we just looked at may seem obvious to you, but they’re so important that I had to point them
out.

Now that we have gone through these fatal mistakes, we can move to the third aspect of a successful
approach…

Adopting attracting body language is simpler than you imagine:

Confident body language is simply appearing calm and relaxed.

The key here is to release all the tension that is in your body.

Make slow and fluid movements. Relaxed movements, not stress-triggered ones.

Adopt a calm and peaceful appearance by relaxing your face muscles.

But that’s not all…

Your look also plays a key role:

Look the girl right in her eyes.

Stare at one of her eyes and maintain eye contact when talking to her.

This way, she’ll find you captivating.

And of course, don’t forget to smile when you approach the girl 🙂

Ideally, the girl must know why you approached her even before you open your mouth.

Two ways to approach a girl:

There are two ways you can approach a girl:

 Direct approach
 Indirect approach
 A direct approach consists of declaring to the girl that you find her attractive in your initial encounter.

For instance:

 “I think you’re gorgeous.”

 “I think you look really nice.”
 “I like your style.”

With an indirect approach, on the other hand, you don’t immediately declare to the girl that you find her
attractive.

For instance, here are some common indirect openers:

 “What did you buy?” (if you decide to use her shopping bag to create a contextual pickup line)
 “What are you reading?” (if you decide to use the magazine she’s reading to approach her)
 “I like your trousers, where did you buy them? A friend of mine has her birthday party next
week and I plan to buy her something sexy.”

No matter the approach you’re going to use, customize it.

It must be unique.

And what is the girl rejects me?

A girl rejects you. So what?

There are so many other girls waiting for you out there.

And you know what?

You’ll be rejected.

Again and again.

And it’s completely normal.

Treat rejection like a victory.

Because if you get rejected, it means that you’ve tried.

It means that you faced your fear and acted as a man by approaching a woman you found attractive.

Now, you may be wondering: “And what if she tells her friends about it or her friends see her rejecting
me?”

I understand that rejections can sometimes harm your reputation (especially in college or in high
school) and that they can frighten you. So here is what you can do to prevent this:

You can simply use an indirect approach, or approach the girl when she’s alone (that way there won’t
be any social pressure coming from her friends).

It is rare that a girl will reject you in a way that seriously harms your reputation. At worse, you’ll
get the “I have a boyfriend” line.

And it’s possible that she won’t even talk about it.
And if she talks about it, it’s not necessarily going to harm your reputation:

Either way, you’ll be seen as a guy who has the balls to approach a girl he likes. In a proper way.
And girls like that.

https://www.waytoosocial.com/how-to-break-the-ice-with-direct-approaches/

What is a “direct approach”?

Let’s just be clear on the terms here. You probably know this, but let me remind you: a “direct
approach”, as opposed to an “indirect” one, is when you state your interest in the person
you’re talking to right away.

“Indirect” would be asking for directions, then “noticing” something about the girl, then asking
her about that and slowly moving forward to more personal subjects.

“Direct” is something like: “I noticed you were cute, and I wanted to talk to you”. Bam. Right
there. No bells and whistles, no BS.

The pre-opener

One thing is easy to forget. Even when you use a “direct” opener, there is still some sort of
initial interaction – no matter how small – that goes on before it. A line like “I just noticed you
were cute…” cannot be the first thing that happens in the interaction with a girl.

It will help to think of opening as a transition between two states:

1. No interaction at all
2. Pretty damn personal interaction

You could try jumping from one to the next, but it’s not very smooth and you may have a
rough landing. There needs to be something in between – like when you get new fish for your
pond, you don’t just dump them in, you put them in a bucket with a mixture of their previous
tank’s water, and the new water. Here are some examples of a transition:

 Say “hello”
 Say “excuse me”
 Wave your hands in front of her eyes (if she’s staring into space dreamily)
 Tap her on the shoulder
 Make eye contact from a couple meters away
  Open your mouth as if getting ready to say something (after all, you are)

Get the point? Now, feel free to come up with your own “attention-getters”. And guess what
you do right after that? Right: nothing. For a couple of seconds. You’re in no rush. Look into
her eyes. If you need more, then read what to say after you’ve said hello.

NOW you can deliver your “direct” line.

And let me give you another piece of advice (I’m going to stray a bit for that one, but bear
with me, it’s valuable):