Have you ever said one thing and did another?

My last thing I said I will never do , but still did it was falling in love the second time , when nothing went
smooth in my first relationship , indeed it failed miserably , I promised myself , never again in my whole
life I will ever fall in trap of love , therefore stayed myself apart from love story but , with speed of time ,
bitterness within me changed gradually I started liking a man , feel as if a second chance was given to me
, with fragrance within me felt me more special , finally, eventually , promised made within me not to
move that direction failed .It is all our false assumptions that we human being create .

For a LONG time I always thought, “I could never be a teacher”. They get paid crap, they have to take
their work home with them, they have to spend their own money on supplies, and many of them bust
their butts and get little to no recognition. But then I realized, all of that is worth it. Because “to teach
someone something, share an experience with them, leave an impression in their mind and and make
an impact on their life; is there anything better?" No, there's not. That is a quote from my ninth grade
English teacher. Our assignment was to write a personal narrative, and she had written her own and
passed it out to the class for an example. That quote was how she ended it.

Self harm.

When I was 12–13, I became depressed. But I told myself I would never become severely depressed.

When I was 14, I became severely depressed. But I told myself I would never become suicidal.

When I was 15, I became suicidal, but I told myself I’d never attempt.

When I was 16, I made many attempts. But I told myself I’d never get hospitalized.

When I was 17, I got hospitalized. ‘But all the people in there were way worse off than me!’ Many
patients were admitted for self-harm. ‘I don’t self-harm.’

On the 4th day of my 14-day stay, I started self-harming.

Digging nails into my flesh until I bled and formed scabs, scabs turning into scars. I was so hurt, so
devastated by what my new roommate had said; she destroyed my last hope, my last safe place.
Hospitals…are supposed to be safe.

I told myself it will never happen again.

Three days later, I became homicidal. I stayed that way for the remainder of my stay. Screaming into
pillows don’t work. Ripping up paper barely works. I couldn’t take my anger and frustrations out on
someone else unless I wanted to stay in the psych unit for another two weeks. So I self-harmed myself
to sleep every single night, as a way to cope.
Now, whenever I’m frustrated, feeling unable to communicate these frustrations to my mother,
therapist, etc….I self-harm.

I didn’t realize how bad it was until I saw the scabs on all over my forearms, until I felt them burn when I
showered.

A good friend of mine told me that the bad thing about self-harm isn’t that started it, but that you won’t
be able to stop. It’s a habit. And like all habits, it’s hard to break.

(Personally I don’t find self-harm to be that bad in itself. After all, a scar or cut isn’t the end of the world.
The truly bad part is how much psychological damage there needs to be for someone to self-harm in the
first place.)

Some light has come out of this, though, believe it or not. I was never able to understand why people
self-harmed. I would always attempt to comfort friends and keep them from harming themselves, but I
would always fail because I couldn’t put myself in their shoes. Now I can.

I find it interesting how we tell ourselves that we will never be that person…until we become that
person.

You’ll never steep that low.

You’ll never be that unstable.

Until you do.

Until you are.

And it makes me wonder…what’s next in line for me?

I think we all know.

Thankfully, it’s nearing summer, which will help my Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD), which is part of
the problem. I’ve decided to redo my junior year next school year, as a way to take some of the pressure
off me and focus on my mental health.

However winter is not as far away as it seems.

What will happen then?

when i turn 18 years old, i went to vote . Since my first exposure to political issues is through my parents
or other adults, it's common for young people to remain thought are the same with their parents
because it was what they were taught and it is what is most familiar to them. This, however, is the
opposite of critical thinking.

I used my critical thinking skills here, I'd review the platform of each candidate, paying attention to what
they are saying about the issues and also why they might have such a position. For example, one
candidate might say that is wrong. but I probably don't know whether or not this is true, thinking
critically would require me to review some data or evidence and learn that this is in fact not true.
Perhaps I liked the candidate in question and I also think he is not suitable for that position. This is
because critical thinking relies on objectivity, which is when I set aside my beliefs and personal feelings
in order to consider something in an unbiased way. This, of course, it's difficult for me.