6 PILLARS OF SELF ESTEEM

IMPROVE WHAT YOU CAN CHANGE, LEARN TO ACCEPT WHAT YOU CAN’T
(CAN’T THINK WORTHLESS WHEN BUILDING SELF ESTEEM)

1) PRACTICE OF LIVING CONSCIOUSLY

2) PRACTICE OF SELF-ACCEPTANCE
3) PRACTICE OF SELF-RESPONSIBILITY
4) PRACTICE OF SELF-ASSERTIVENESS
5) PRACTICE OF LIVING PURPOSELY
6) PRACTICE OF PERSONAL INTGRETY

Zeal Habits Health – stop laziness, procrastination

1) it must be obvious – put apples on table so you can see them/not in the bottom of the refrigerator where
it’s hidden then the apples are forgotten until weeks later or when they’ve spoiled.
2) Start small – Say I want to walk every day, but never do it. break the ritual down to small steps. PUN
INTENDED. Example: Wake up. Put on shoes. Walk outside the door. Lock the door. Then come back in.
This teaches you how to become the type of person who walks every day. Mastering the art of “just show
up”. habits must be established before they can be improved. Start creating a new normal in my life by
making something like walking a standard. if you don’t become the type of person who gets ready to walk,
just showing up, then you don’t have a chance at being the person who walks every day. Just start showing up
in a small way. No matter how small – like 1 pushup a day – 2 sentences a day in journal. Just putting on your
shoes. habits are the entry point, not the end point. it’s hailing the cab. Not making it to the gym or walking
trail. these are entrance ramps to daily routines. how you start typically predicts how you end. Especially the
first 30 minutes of anything. Start by surfing the internet, then nothing gets done. or start doing the hard
stuff and eventually completing them or continuing them. Organize my environment or join a community or
restructure your habits. habits are socially reinforced like unspoken social contracts – like way we dress for
interviews. you want to join a group that have your desired behavior is your normal.
The reward systems of habits are strong influencers with habits we do or don’t do. We prefer anything that
gives immediate gratification. Example – eating a donut vs. working out. bad habits all have favorable
immediate rewards.
Bad habits tend to last a long time. Long term the rewards are unfavorable. ultimate rewards. the opposite is
true.
Limit habit to 2 minutes a day whatever it may be for 1 week. then build from there. established before
improved.
You have a finite amount of willpower. Willpower gets depleted.
You use the same willpower for all tasks – being counterproductive or productivity = same amount of
willpower
Example – work 8 hours & housekeeping at home. after working, its highly likely you won't want to clean once
your home.
Wake on Saturday – instead of doing my usual journaling/praying - I go grocery shopping. seeing as though
I'm finding grocery shopping quite overwhelming with all the choices I’m trying to decide from. everything
you buy came with a decision you made. now you’re exhausted. and vice versa.
Start day with your creative work and not waste your willpower on wasting time.
Start planning earlier more often
Do one thing at a time and do it well
Sleep should be the best and first habit
Sleep depravity
Short sleep = short life. short sleep predicts all-cause mortality. lifespan is not health span. sleep should be
medicinal as preventative and healing. insufficient sleep is significantly link to lack of sleep.
1 percent better every day
Aggregation of marginal gains
One percent improvement in everything we do
Make all small changes – from hygiene to sleep to actual activity like dancing
Small improvements can add up to significant changes in a relatively short period of time
1 percent better for 365 days which is 37 percent better
Also – becoming 10 percent better would be at 1 percent better for 5 days a week for 46 weeks a year. with
that you get 6 weeks off for that year. you can use it for sick days or holidays.

The system makes the difference, not the goal. the goal remains the same. only the system needs changing

5/25 rule – Warren Buffet

First take 25 things I want to achieve – write them down – then circle the top 5 things on the list
Now tell what your strategy at this point is. you decide to start by working on the first five things.
What about all the others from 6 – 25. work on them a little at a time. wrong. the top 5 things are your
priorities. it should be on the ‘never do anything under any circumstance list’. There are good things
to do with our time and great things to do with our time. only work on the great, the top five circled.

Sleep
It must be dark, no light at all. then your core temperature needs to drop by about 1-degree Celsius or 2-3
degrees Fahrenheit just to initiate sleep. easier to sleep in cold room rather than hot room. drop in body
temperature is due from the temperature dropping at night.
Alcohol is not a sleep aid. it harms your sleep. It fragments your sleep by waking up all night that it's not
remembered when we wake up. blocks dream sleep = rem sleep.

Change story – change life

Negative view of aging – makes decisions that aren't good vice versa
Positive view of aging – makes better choices like eating better and taking better care of themselves
Positive = lives 7.6 years longer than negative
Positive takes healthy actions
Negative won't take those actions
For behaviors to change – think of a layered onion
The outside layer – results outcomes goals
Next inner layer – actions – this is where a lot of us stop at that then prevents us reaching the outer level of
desired results – but it’s not the actions fault
Must go deeper to the layer behind or drives the behavior
The innermost layer/core = identity or belief or mindset – take your pick

The identity that we hold drives the actions we take and the results that we get.
Positive identity – positive actions – lose 10 pounds – so the goal is outermost layer/the result we’re looking
for
In order to lose 10 lbs, we must move into the actions that we take like diet/exercise.
But most people stop there. the identity might be I want to be the person who doesn’t miss workouts.
Focus just on the identity of becoming the type of person who does not miss workouts – if you become the
person who exercises
Shift in mindset = shift in daily choices – shifts then to the desired result
Environment design = influences behavior. restructure physical or digital environment like the stuff on
counters or desks. stuff we can see that’s very visible – cant miss stuff. restructure creates an environment
that will more llikely enable you to stick with better habits. too much tv is because its in the living room. so
you can change the furniture or unplug the tv or stay out of the room. this is an example of curtailing or
stopping a negative habit. then an example of promoting good habits is the apple scenario.

Change my story change my life

The way you think affects your life. people don’t do it because you don’t believe is true. yoiur brain is
organize to reflect everything you know in your life. it’s a record of my environment and artifact of my life.
Do the same exact routine daily like all days before – same people can push same people etc.

Did your brain change at all duribng this day..of course not. think same do same makes no change in life. no
change in external environment. thinking equal and same life.
Start thinking greater than my external environment. cant see it but it can believe its alive in your mind. start
living your life as if its already happened. personality create personal creates your personal reality
Personality is made up of how I think, react, and feel. present perssonality at this moment has been created
the present personal reality in my life. new personal reality requires changing the thoughts im thinking. and
behaviors and habits im demonstrating and the emotions ive memorized that’s become part of my identity.
people try to create a new personal reality with the same personality. don’t work. become somebody else.
same makes only same. nerve cells wired together fire together. so repeating the same states of mind and
body over and over again – your brain fires the same everything. mind is brain in action. Remind your brain –
make the brain work diffderently. by knowledge in information because you learning . everytime you learn
something new, you make a new connection in your brain. learning is forging new connections. remembering
is maintaining or sustaining those connections.
Every thought comes with a chemical. any time you have a great thoughts or unlimited thought or joyful
thought = you turn on a set of circuits in your brain that fires in a very specific sequence, patten, and
combination that produces a level of mind that turns on nother part of the brain that makes a chemical for
you to begin to feel exactly the way you were just THINKING. bam... and vice versa equating to all negative.
so the moment you begin to feel the way you think – because the brain is in constant communication with
your body – you begin to think the way you feel and the way you think which makes more chemicals to feel
the way I think then you think the way you feel and feel the way you think etc. too many people do this for
like 20 or 30 or 40 years. redundancy over time creates what is called a state of being . this is when mind
aand body work together and thoughts and feelings are aligned to a concept.
Thoughts are the language of the brain. feelings are the language of the body. mind and body opposition is
when the person wants to think positively but feeling negatively. you want to create dream board but you
don’t feel worthy.
The body must be reconditioned to a new mind. we must move into anew state of being. state of being is the
combo of how im feeling and how im thinking. most people wait for traumas and loss so significant that the
ego is brought to such a low level that they cant go on as business as usual any longer in order or before
wanting real change. this is when most of us start thinking about themselves as a whole – thinking, actng, or
attitude or emotions they’ve been living by. why wait. we can learn to change in the state of pain and
suffering which tends to be the human model. or we can learn and change in a state of joy and inspiration.
oom. drop in body temperature is due from the temperature dropping at night.
Alcohol is not a sleep aid. it harms your sleep. It fragments your sleep by waking up all night that it's not
remembered when we wake up. blocks dream sleep = rem sleep.

Change thoughts, beliefs, now. thinking and writing makes changes

I AM _____.