3 Powerful Questions To Change Your Life

3 Powerful Questions
to
Change Your Life
The power of inquiry

to help you succeed
at work and in life
Thaddeus Lawrence
3 Powerful Questions to Change Your Life
“Judge a man by his questions

rather than by his answers.”
― Voltaire
For those of you who don’t know me, my name is Thaddeus Lawrence.
Before I share with you directly from my experience helping coaches build a coaching and education
business that facilitates transformation for hundreds, and thousands, of people each year and brings in
multiple 6- gures of income, I want to thank you…
I want to thank you rst of all for your time, and secondly for your commitment. Simply by getting
your hands and setting your eyes on these upcoming pages, you’re creating a level of distinction that is
valuable toward your success.
If you are anything like the majority of coaches and coachees I work with (and de nitely me at times),
you are busy . Busy juggling the demands of work, family, life and likely having more things in front of
you than time to complete them. Which makes it even more special that you took the time to download
and read this book; that you are willing to invest energy and e ort to continue your ongoing learning. I
take your trust seriously and so, from the bottom of my heart, I applaud you.
Know that my goal in writing and sharing these questions with you is give you the key to wisdom, that
is, in the words of French scholastic philosopher and preeminent logician, Peter Abelard...
The Coaching Hand Thaddeus Lawrence

"...constant and frequent questioning, f by doubting we are led to

question, by questioning we arrive at e tru ."
This book is an introduction to the material I’ll be covering in my upcoming web class, “Coaching for
Success” so you can start your rst steps today. In this class, you’ll learn simple strategies, techniques and
behaviours that helped me achieve the success that I now have and which I have used to help countless
others create in their lives.
But rst, I want to ask you this question: What led you here? How has life (the events, your experiences,
your career; your purpose, your desire, your yearning, your learning, our relationship…) led you to
opening and reading this book right now?
As Steve Jobs once said, you can only connect the dots looking back. There is a reason why our paths are
crossing right now. I don’t know what it is, but I’d predict that this isn’t a random chance that you are
reading 3 Powerful Questions to Change Your Life.
Cat: Where are you going?
Alice: Which way should I go?
Cat: That depends on where you are going.
Alice: I don’t know.
Cat: Then it doesn’t matter which way you go.”

Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland

Who is 3 Powerful Questions to Change Your Life for?
It’s for men and women, young and old, who are dissatis ed with things as they are — for those who
hear a silent whisper that things can be entirely di erent; for those who feel a faint ache in their hearts
for something more; for those who seek greater meaning and deeper joy in their lives.
It is for anyone weary of his grinding spinning on the hamster wheel of life, that carries her to a dizzying
vortex of busyness — and then drops you o right back to where you started.
Most of all, these questions are for those who are willing to challenge their present ideas about life and
explore the possibilities that lie beyond their current consciousness. People don’t live the way they do
because they like it. They live the way they do because they don’t know any other way.
My wish for you is that these questions open the door to another world view; that these questions
pro er the promise of life-changing power; that you give yourself permission to contemplate the essence
of your life through these questions. As Carl Sagan, one of the most brilliant and talented geniuses to
ever walk our planet said,
"We can judge our progress by e courage of our questions and e dep
of our answers, our wi ingness to em ace what is true ra er an
what f ls good.”
So...would you like to be a lot happier and have a lot more inner peace? Would you like to have a lot more
joy and fun? Would you like to fully live your one precious life? If so, you have come to the right place...

“The scientist is not a person

who gives the right answers,
he is the one who...
asks the right questions.”
― Claude Levi-Strauss
“Is that all you do? People pay you big money just for you to ask them questions?”, my mentor’s young
son quipped in disbelief as she put down the phone after a 10-minute power coaching call.
I was equally amazed and, by that time back in 2007, had already seen all too often the indisputable
power of questions to create shifts in a person. On top of that, I saw how this work could be so lucrative.
I mean, what a ful lling life it would be to make meaning and make money at the same time! To do well
by doing good…that is bliss.
I knew then that if I wanted to live my mission of moving, educating and inspiring people to prosper in
a life of presence, purpose and possibilities, I had to master the art and science of asking questions.

Fast forward to the present day and I count my blessings that I live my mission each day. Asking
questions is the rst step, to coach my clients to ask themselves the right questions is another. And to
now be passing on those skills by training new and aspiring coaches takes it to a whole new level for me.
I am indeed blissfully blessed.
Everybody wants a good life. Everyone wants to feel good. Every person wants to have a happy life, have
a lot of money, have loving relationships, have a healthy body, have an amazing job. Is that true for you
too?
I was seated at a food court eating my lunch one day and in walked a mother and her young daughter.
Mother: “What do you want to eat?”

Daughter: “I don’t know.”
Mother: “Do you want to have the chicken rice?”

Daughter: “I don’t want.”
Mother: “Then what do you want?”

Daughter: “I don’t know.”
Mother: “How about the fish noodles?”

Daughter: “I don’t want.”
Mother: “Then what do you want?”
Daughter: "I don't know."

Mother: "If you can't choose then you'll just eat whatever I get you!"
Does that sound familiar? Well, that's how a lot of people live their lives! What are you 'eating' in your
life right now? Did you choose it? Or was it thrust upon you? Is that what you want? Actually...

What do you want?

It seems like such a simple and straightforward question, yet I hear people say things like the following:
“I had been so clear about what I didn't want! I would cry about my situation that I didn't want.”
“[it was a powerful question] when I came to a point in my life wherein I had to choose between two or several
paths that would lead to very different outcomes.”
“When asked, I realised that I had never really thought about what I wanted. It was as if a whole new world
opened up!”
The number 1 reason why most people don’t get what they want is because they don’t know what they
want. They waste their precious life energy mired in the pits of dead end, whether in their family or
relationships. They squander their limited time rolling in the trenches of uncertainty when it comes to
their job, career or business. They exhaust themselves struggling in the quicksand of negativity, just
about surviving instead of fully thriving in all areas of life.
Treading this vast open sea of decisions, a few things can happen. You feel anxious, agitated or angry. You
feel restless, helpless or directionless. You feel you are constantly treading the waters of scarcity, security
and survival. The only way out is to grab that hand of clarity and honesty. To come clear and truthful
about what you really want. To allow yourself the elemental possibility that you could have what you
want. Or at least dream about what you want.

For some, your answer comes easily, as if the thing you wanted was staring you in the face all this while.
For others, it could take a lifetime to gure out, like the completion of an ever-lasting philosophical
puzzle.
What do you want?
Either way, it’s a question for all of us to think about at one point or another. Charles Bukowski puts it
this way,
“If some ing burns your soul wi purpose and desire, it's your duty to
be reduced to ashes by it. Any o er f m of existence wi be yet ano er
du book in e li ary of life.”

Do something that you are passionate about! Follow your passion! Do what you love and you never have
to work a single day of your life!
Have you ever heard any of the above adages? Or worse, have you ever found yourself spouting them to
others? If so, please stop. Yes, stop telling people to nd their passion.
Yes, I know you are well-intended and well-meaning, but it may not be good advice. Here's why...
A recent Stanford research paper identi es the main aw of this ubiquitous advice: “Finding your
passion” presupposes that interests and passions are xed and evident, rather than uid and evolving as
we age and gain life experience and wisdom. They imply that once an interest resonates, pursuing it will
be easy.
Those who follow the xed mindset are much more likely to give up when obstacles arise. They are more
likely to surrender their interest when they encounter inevitable challenges. In other words, when the
going gets tough, they quit. Mantras like “ nd your passion” put short-term emotional comfort on a
pedestal by valuing above all else excitement, enjoyment, enthusiasm. Yet when we look at the de nition
of the word “passion”, we see that it has its roots in the Latin “pati”, meaning “to su er’.
WHAT!? Passion means to su er?
I'm afraid so, my friend. Hence the Passion of Christ refers to the su ering and death of Jesus Christ.
And that also explains why those who see passion in the intensity of short-term emotional highs give up
as soon as they hit the rst bump!

Maybe a better question to ask is:
What are you willing to suffer for?

台上十分钟，台下十年功
Literally translated, the above Chinese proverb states that it takes 10 years of work to prepare for 10
minutes on stage. The implication is that hard work prepares one for success.
It may not be fashionable or trendy or current to say that these days, given how we crave stories of
spontaneous self-actualization and celebrate apparent overnight successes, but I will say that if you want
to achieve something grand, perform at the pinnacle of your profession, be world class and truly make a
di erence, you will need (and demand of yourself!) long-term discipline and an accumulation of work,
practice and application.
In other words, yours is not a journey paved with short-lived excitement or exhaustible enthusiasm, but
one lined with the never-ending marathon of su ering the toil and labour of doing whatever it takes to
live the life you desire and deserve.
We all know that the ower doesn’t burst from bud to blossom in one spirited moment, yet we are
disinterested in, and impatient with, the tedium of the blossoming process, in the multitude of
(sometimes agonising and often repetitive) small steps by which we pave the path to our own destiny in
the very act of walking it.

“I deserve to be put on stage”, “You’ve got to give me a shot”, “It is high time I got promoted”, are the
common refrains I hear from new, aspiring trainers and coaches (feel free to insert the profession or
discipline of your choice here). These come from naïve ignorance and hurried ambition at best and a
sense of entitlement and instant grati cation at worst. People’s lives are in your hands; this is not about
you. It is about you being in the best possible position to serve others. The truth of your readiness is in
the impact you make and the learning you create, not how great you feel or the adulation you receive.
Whether you aspire to be a world class trainer or desire to climb the world’s tallest mountains; aim to
produce a stunning piece of art or yearn to write an original piece of music; dream of being nancially
free or set your heart on starting a business… whatever it is that you set out to do, achieve and
accomplish; if you are serious about the best that you can be and truly want to add the utmost value to
the world then you’ve got to put in the work. Period. Be in long-term, consistent, deliberate practice. It’s
what happens behind the scenes, o ine, out of sight, that matters.
It’s not magic, it’s not sexy, it’s not what you want to hear (maybe).
But it works. Helen Keller puts it beautifully,
Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only rough

experience of trial and suffering can e soul be streng ened, ambition
inspired and success achieved.

So, what are you willing to su er for?

But what if it doesn’t work out? “What if I fail?”, you ask.
The internet is rife with motivational quotes along the lines of “failure is temporary, quitting is
permanent.” Sometimes they are framed as questions: “what would you set out to achieve if you were
guaranteed to succeed? and “what would you attempt to do if you knew you could not fail?”
These are great questions to get you dreaming of possibilities and envisioning di erent courses of action.
But in so far as actually getting you started, I have another question:
What is worth doing even if you fail?

Back in 2009, I did what most sane people would not do: I registered for a 250-kilometre footrace in the
Sahara desert. Yes, I paid good money to carry 12 kilograms of gear and food in a seven-day self-
supported footrace in the world’s largest subtropical desert in western Egypt; to run the gauntlet of
searing heat, debilitating dehydration, and acute physical discomfort in a race named by TIME Magazine
as one of its Top Ten Endurance Competitions in the world.
My chances of success were low. I was not considered athletic by any stretch of the imagination. The
furthest I had run up to this point was 10 kilometres. I hated camping in the outdoors and had a strong
a nity for my accustomed creature comforts.
But this endeavour got me to question the very de nition of success and failure.

Before we go any further, we have to visit the principle of precession as de ned by R. Buckminster Fuller
— the e ect of bodies in motion on other bodies in motion.
“The Sun and the Earth are both bodies in motion. Despite the 180-degree gravitational pull of the in-motion Sun
upon the in-motion Earth, precession makes Earth orbit around the Sun in a direction that is at ninety degrees- i.e.,
at a right angle-to the direction of the Sun’s gravitational pull.”
Buckminster Fuller, Critical Path, page 142.
Similarly, if we drop a stone into water, we get ripples going out at ninety degrees to the direction of the
dropped stone.
One of Bucky Fuller’s favourite analogies regarding precession was the story of the honey-bee. The
honey-bee’s business (conscious purpose) is to go about gathering nectar from owers for its beehive.
Unbeknownst to the bee, it is playing a part in something way bigger than itself. Precessionally, at 90
degrees to his body and his ight path, his legs gather pollen from one ower and inadvertently takes this
pollen to the next ower, resulting in cross pollination. The honey- bee thus contributes enormously to
life on earth. More than 100 agricultural crops in the United States alone are pollinated by bees!

Just like the honey-bee, when you follow your centered purpose, you are taking part in The Universe’s
grander plan. The problem is that most people’s vision is so tunneled toward the day to day goals that
they don’t see the bigger purpose for their place on earth.
When I signed up for the Sahara Race, I thought that part of my mission of inspiring others to be the
best version of themselves would be served when I crossed the nishing line in triumph. I couldn’t have
been more wrong.
The mere act of my entering the race encouraged others. People actually found inspiration in what I was
attempting , never mind whether I crossed the nishing line. In my starting, they rediscovered courage
and re in their bellies. The side e ect of my race endeavour was greater than the main e ect of the race
itself .
I know, it’s mad, right? But it shouldn’t be. My mission is bigger than my goals. We are all awed and
imperfect beings. And we will fail. Repeatedly. Now, what if the mere beginning of your quest to achieve
your goals creates a form of cross-pollination? Because it does, regardless of outcome.
What if starting your business brings hope to others?
What is asking the girl/guy out builds their con dence?

What if leaving your job leaves your family better o ?
What if something bigger and better comes out of your seemingly making a fool out of yourself?
What is worth doing even if you fail?

“I want to know if you can be with joy, mine or your own, if you can dance with wildness and let the ecstasy fill
you to the tips of your finers and toes without cautioning us to be careful, to be realistic, to remember the
limitations of being human.
“I want to know if you can disappoint another to be true to yourself; if you can hear the accusation of betrayal and
not betray your own soul; if you can be faithless and therefore trustworthy.”
Oriah, The Invitation
I know I promised you 3 powerful questions that could change your life. First of all, congratulations on
getting to this point. In this age of short attention spans, I salute you for making it this far!
If the questions have helped you gain some clarity or a level of distinction…if you have paused to re ect
on the questions…if this has come at a tipping point of a time for you…I would love to hear what
di erence this book has made for you. It’s one of the big things that keep me going and energized – to
hear the di erence and changes that my work has created in others. You can send me an email direct to
my inbox thaddeus@therunawaysuccess.com I love hearing your stories!
And since we are here, let me give you a bonus question.
Would you like that?

“Your whole body, from wingtip to wingtip,

is nothing more than your thought itself
in a form that you can see
Break the chains of your thought
and you break the chains of your body too
―Jonathan Livingston Seagull
Ok let's jump straight into it.
At various points of our lives (and various points within a day!) we take time to set goals, resolutions and
commitments. Working privately with my one on one clients, there is a process that we go through to
make sure that the chances of their actually getting started and getting the results they want skyrockets.
And that process is important because we see all too often how, all around us, the ocean of resolutions
turns into a wasteland of dissolutions; goal-setting sinks into excuse-seeking; intention declaration into
intention abortion.
So if you are sick and tired of not accomplishing your goals and letting yourself down, let’s dive into
what the rst part of this process is.

What do you need to let go of?

Getting what you want and living the life that you both desire and deserve is not all about taking on new
tasks and adding to your to-do lists. It’s also about decluttering, releasing, emancipating. Using the
inspiration of Eckhart Tolle's words,
“Sometimes letting go is an act of far greater power an defending

hanging on, I wish f you e courage to let go so as to harness e
power of your liberation."
There are 3 ways we can look at this.

What do you need to decommit from?

Do you sometimes feel that you have put way too much on your plate? Have you ever committed to
something yet deep down inside you know that it wasn’t something you truly wanted? Have you got an
undertaking that feels more of an obligation than a desire? Do you have a goal that doesn’t serve you
anymore but is sucking up your previous energy, time and thoughts?
If you answered yes to any of the questions above, then it might be time for you to make a
decommitment. Decommit from that initial goal or competing commitment. Cut the umbilical cord.
Say goodbye, ciao, adios, sayonara. Free yourself so you make space for what truly matters, for that
something better, for what is more important in this next paragraph of your life story.
What story do you need to dissociate from?

Your inner critic, critical inner voice, little voice… You know, the one that says “you’re not good
enough”, “you’re too <insert adjective>”, “you can’t <insert verb>…and then proceeds to give you a
mountain of evidence and an archive of stories to support its truth? How’s that working for you?
The problem is that we become so familiar and comfortable with its presence that we wear it like a badge
of honour, a safety shield, a fact jacket. Might it be that it has actually become at best an annoyance or at
worst your prison? What’s the big one holding you back and making you small that you do NOT want
accompanying you into the next phase of your life?
And in its place, insert a new story; an empowering one that serves you, not shackles you.

Who might you need to distance yourself from?

The quality of our lives depends on the quality of our relationships. Some relationships are loving,
nurturing and energizing. Some others are toxic, destructive and belittling. Of the latter, who have you
had enough of? Maybe you’ve given your all and your best. Maybe you’ve been agonizing over leaving.
Maybe you’ve realized that this person is not good for you, your future and your happiness.
In order for you to liberate yourself, which relationship might you have to end? Or, if you can’t end it,
maybe to distance yourself from this person so as not to let them have any power or energy over you any
more. Leave this person behind as you leave the previous chapter behind.

So there we have it! 3 questions to change your life with an additional 3-part bonus question! Simple
questions but not necessarily the easiest to answer. If you give yourself the permission, space and time to
let them marinate in you, to let yourself ruminate over them, you may well feel a stirring in your heart
and a rumbling in your gut. Welcome them and see if you can be 'friendly' with them.
Now, this book is a great start to the basics of your inner game — but this is just the beginning. If you’ve
enjoyed these lessons and questions…here are 3 ways I can help you grow your results and create the life
you want and/or grow your coaching practice:
1. Join The Coaching Hand and connect with other individuals who are creating results in their lives and businesses
It’s our brand new Facebook community where smart people learn and support one another to get more
income, create more impact, and improve themselves. — Click Here
2. Join our Implementation Program and be a Case Study
I’m putting together a new coaching case study group this month... stay tuned for details. If you’d like to
work with me on your plans to become a coach and get clients... just email me and put "Case Study" in the
subject line.
3. Work with me and my team privately
If you’d like to work directly with me and my team to take you from 5 to 6 gures... just email me and
put "Private" in the subject line.... tell me a little about your business and what you’d like to work on
together, and I’ll get you all the details!

Be warned though, working with me will support and challenge you to level up your current way of
thinking, challenge your beliefs and behaviours — and put you in a position to succeed. I’m going to
share a lot more advanced information and tools (and questions!) that you can use to master your life —
and achieve the success you’re capable of.
It’s not for everybody, and it may make some people uncomfortable. And that’s ne. But if you’re up
for it, and you’re ready to make a change, I strongly urge you to join us by taking action now. We will
take the concepts covered in this book way further, and will give you the exact action steps required to
live a powerful, successful, happy, joyful and ful lling life.
And isn’t that what everyone wants?
I thank you for your time and trust in letting me teach and share my expertise and experience.
Be good and be well. Be blessed.
Thaddeus Lawrence

Te me, what is it you plan to do wi your one wild and precious life? - Mary Oliver, The Summer Day

Thaddeus Lawrence
Thaddeus is one of Asia’s leading and most
respected coaches. Over the last 14 years he has
helped over 150,000 individuals create massive
results in their work and achieve professional,
financial and personal success through his training
and coaching engagements across 20+ countries .
He has made it his mission to move, educate and

inspire people to become better versions of
themselves and prosper through a life of presence,
purpose and possibilities.
Thaddeus leads a community that provides a set of

tools, strategies and resources for those who want
to make a fortune while making a difference.
Aspiring and experienced coaches look to
Thaddeus when they want expert help from
someone who has ‘been there, done that’ to launch
their coaching career, structure their coaching
program, and build a thriving business model.

3 Powerful Questions To Change Your Life

Uploaded by

Document Information

Original Description:

Original Title

Copyright

Available Formats

Share this document

Share or Embed Document

Sharing Options

Did you find this document useful?

Is this content inappropriate?

Copyright:

Available Formats

3 Powerful Questions To Change Your Life

Uploaded by

Copyright:

Available Formats

3 Powerful Questions

The power of inquiry

“Judge a man by his questions

multiple 6- gures of income, I want to thank you…

valuable toward your success.

The Coaching Hand Thaddeus Lawrence

"...constant and frequent questioning, f by doubting we are led to

opening and reading this book right now?

Cat: Where are you going?

Alice: Which way should I go?

Cat: That depends on where you are going.

Alice: I don’t know.

Cat: Then it doesn’t matter which way you go.”

The Coaching Hand Thaddeus Lawrence

Who is 3 Powerful Questions to Change Your Life for?

ever walk our planet said,

The Coaching Hand Thaddeus Lawrence

“The scientist is not a person

by doing good…that is bliss.

The Coaching Hand Thaddeus Lawrence

I am indeed blissfully blessed.

Mother: “What do you want to eat?”

Mother: “Do you want to have the chicken rice?”

Mother: “Then what do you want?”

Mother: “How about the ﬁsh noodles?”

Daughter: "I don't know."

The Coaching Hand Thaddeus Lawrence

What do you want?

about surviving instead of fully thriving in all areas of life.

want. Or at least dream about what you want.

The Coaching Hand Thaddeus Lawrence

What do you want?

The Coaching Hand Thaddeus Lawrence

WHAT!? Passion means to su er?

The Coaching Hand Thaddeus Lawrence

Maybe a better question to ask is:

What are you willing to suffer for?

The Coaching Hand Thaddeus Lawrence

But it works. Helen Keller puts it beautifully,

Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only rough

The Coaching Hand Thaddeus Lawrence

But what if it doesn’t work out? “What if I fail?”, you ask.

But in so far as actually getting you started, I have another question:

What is worth doing even if you fail?

as one of its Top Ten Endurance Competitions in the world.

a nity for my accustomed creature comforts.

The Coaching Hand Thaddeus Lawrence

— the e ect of bodies in motion on other bodies in motion.

Buckminster Fuller, Critical Path, page 142.

The Coaching Hand Thaddeus Lawrence

your goals creates a form of cross-pollination? Because it does, regardless of outcome.

What if starting your business brings hope to others?

What is asking the girl/guy out builds their con dence?

What is worth doing even if you fail?

The Coaching Hand Thaddeus Lawrence

Oriah, The Invitation

And since we are here, let me give you a bonus question.

Would you like that?

The Coaching Hand Thaddeus Lawrence

“Your whole body, from wingtip to wingtip,

Ok let's jump straight into it.

what the rst part of this process is.