THE GENESIS.

My name is xoxo. My name doesn’t really matter, what matters is my

story. I was born on 16 th December 1990, into a family of 7. My dad is a
chartered accountant; my mum is a high school teacher. For the record, I
am the first child, a son. I have four siblings, 3boys and a little sister who’s
now fast turning into a lady as of this time. My home was a very Christian
one, we wake up 5am every morning to recite the rosary and do same
10pm every night before the sheets. I was born with a silver spoon; my dad
was at a time the richest man in my clan. I remember as a child, we were
the only ones who had television and video machine. I remember we had
four cars and housemaids everywhere. I remember the clothes, the
varieties of foods, the outings and the visitors. Despite all the influence and
affluence, my home wasn’t a very happy one.
I hail from a village where there is no law; where there is no sinner
and there is no saint; where there is no right and there is no wrong. A
village where everything you do is right as long as you can back it; either
with influence, affluence, intelligent but most times it’s with ruggedity. To
be frank, my village is no longer a village, it isn’t a city or a town but can
pass for anything. It’s known all over the country, its notoriety based on it’s
a home for all crimes. The name of my hometown is Obosi. It’s situated in
Idemmili North L.G.A; Anambra state.
My grand dad was a king, the first king of the new Obosi era; he
married 9 wives and acquired for himself a village he couldn’t carter for. Of
all his numerous children, only my dad has a degree; I guess that’s the
reason all his siblings both in and step ganged against him and are still
ganging till date. When I was 5, I watched an idiot who was supposed to be
my cousin stab my dad twice, on the chest and on the shoulder, in our own
living room. I’ve watched them burn our house and cars countless times. I
was too young to do anything, too young to even speak. They always go
scot free because in my hometown, everybody gets away with anything
even murder. I wasn’t just too young to fight; I was too scared to even utter
a word because of the way I was raised. My home was military; I was raised
with an iron hand a dreading spirit.
LESSON 1: My dad’s first mistake was raising his children
in isolation and like military. He raised us to dread and
fear him instead of love and respect him. Never you raise
your children to dread and fear you just because maybe

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 you’re scared they might grow someday to disobey you ;
but raise them with love and play, relate with them like a
best friend but put a fine line between being a friend and
being a dad and make sure they all see where the line is,
so in return they’ll love and respect you. By so doing,
they’ll always be willing to open up to you given any
circumstance. If your son can not tell you as a dad that he
fought or was beaten in school, or pulled any of the many
stunts kids do, then you’re just a father and not a dad. If
your daughter as a teen couldn’t tell you when she’s
crunching on someone or being crunched on, you’ve failed
as a mum, you’re just mother. BOTTOM LINE: It’s better
your children love and respect you than fear and dread
you.
My dad was such a boss man that everybody dreaded him; nobody
comes to my house, those who took the risk, will flee for their life when
they hear the hoot of his car. All my life, I was raised indoors; I dare not
cross our entrance door. I had all I wanted but toys and play mates. Even
though we had television and video machine, the only moving pictures I
saw as a kid was the 9.00 news. I spent other part of my childhood solving
mathematics.
I attended Maria Ines Nursery/Primary School, not just because it
was the best if not the only Nursery/Primary in my hometown then, but
because it is run by the missionary sisters and my parents are staunch
Catholics. During my primary school days, I was the best. I’m not just saying
it, the record is there. I always take the first position, not just me, but me
and my sibs. My dad is blessed with 5 super intelligent kids; our classmates
will celebrate us home with cheers and songs because of our astounding
results. The only time I took the 2nd position due to illness, the news spread
like wild fire, like something impossible just happened. My dad heard the
news far away in Enugu state. That was when I knew there’s something
about me, some sort of charisma I haven’t explored yet, because I’m always
news. When I graduated from primary school, it was written boldly on my
testimonial ‘he’s the star of the school’. One mystery about me is that there
are always two sides of me; the good side and the bad side. On the bad side,
while my younger brother is the only pupil till date to ever hold the post of
a head boy in Maria Ines, I’m the pupil till date to ever have being
suspended from school. On the good side, I was the only pupil till date who

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represented Maria Ines highest number of times in external exams, quiz
and debates. I sat for 16 external exams in my primary 6, I failed in none. I
gained admission into many schools then, but my dad, due to reasons I’m
still yet to understand till date, enrolled me into the seminary against my
own wish.
LESSON 2: The family, though is the smallest, but is still an
organ of the society where democracy should be exercised.
This was my dad’s 2nd mistake. His home was very autocratic
and monopolized. Nobody has a say, not even my mum, all he
does is leave instructions that must be followed to the very
last. Most African men especially Nigerians do same; just
because they are called the head, they impose their will on
everybody, both wife and kids. Wives should have a say in the
family, they have equal rights with their husbands. Even the
children too should have a say, they are part of the family and
have rights too. It’s only when the wife’s opinion is heard and
the children’s feelings are addressed, can the family be called a
big happy family.

THE FIGHT
All my life, even till now, I don’t know any of my uncles or aunties,
especially from my paternal side. I have never received not even a dime
from anybody outside my parents throughout my school days. My family,
extended family is in a deep serious fight. A fight that started ever before I
was born, I can’t say for sure the reason for the fight, all I know is that
everybody was and is still fighting my dad till date. According to a sided
story, my mum’s version to be precise, my dad doesn’t tell stories at least
not to his children; you can only sit or stand before my dad only when he
wants to instruct you or reprimand you. However, according to the story,
my dad has just one in brother, others are step. He’s a reverend father, was
actually; used to be before his demise. He travelled to India, learnt
spiritism, came back and was performing miracles. Should I call it miracle
or magic? He healed the sick; broke curses, yokes and bondages; I learnt he
once raised a dead. But his speciality was madness, he healed many mad
people, in fact you’ll find more mad people in my compound then than in
Yaba left. Because he was very good at what he did, money was pumping in;
he as a reverend father couldn’t do much with all the money, so he
distributed among his sibs, safe for my dad who never supported him. My

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dad is very principled, strict but an honest man, nothing on earth will make
deny or keep silent when truth is being suppressed, even if it will cost him
his life. He dissociated himself from his immediate environment, he
believed they were below his standard; they were uneducated, poor and
corrupt.
LESSON 3: Don’t ever dissociate yourself from your immediate
environment. If you think the people around you are below
your standard or lead a life contrary to your conducts, leave
them, relocate to an environment suitable to standard and
ethics. This was my dad’s 3rd mistake. He isolated himself from
immediate environment, nobody comes to our house and we go
to nobody’s house, he relates with no one and the worst is they
were family. The ant is too small compared to a roach, the
roach even use the ant for meal; but if many ants come
together, and collaborate, they’ll drown a roach and use it for
supper. Those street boys, those riffraff, and those societal
rejects you taunt because you believe they are up to no good, if
they gang up against you, you’ll be surprised how much effect
they’ll have on you.
Because my dad’s sibs felt degraded, underrated, neglected and
insulted by my dad, they hated him. They ganged up against him, they
plotted his down fall for many years, they vowed on pulling him down,
funny enough, they succeeded.
My dad’s sib, the reverend, was doing his thing for years till it caught
up with him. His instruments made him mad. Actually, nobody knew for
sure if it was his instruments or one of the madness he cured turned
against him, whichever way, he went mad. My dad took it upon himself to
help him get well; he invited another priest to pray for him. Fr. Jude Onyeka
prayed for my uncle for good 13days; on the 13 th day, he burnt all his
instruments, prayed earnestly and my uncle got back his sanity. He was
grateful at first when he was told all that happened, but became furious
when he learnt that his instruments were gone. He turned against my dad,
said my dad destroyed his work out of jealousy, he connived with the other
jobless sibs who gained lots from the work and they came after my dad.
They came both spiritually and physically, they came very brutally. I
watched them met so many evil on the man I call my father, I was too young
to do anything, but the evils I saw gave birth to the beast in me. The only
time in my whole life my dad has ever been cuffed was when his own in
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brother lent him his car, only to go make a report at the station that his car
was stolen at gun point.
LESSON 4: Don’t ever render help, or give advice or suggestion
except you’re called upon to do so. Do not hurt little children or
the old; always help them anytime you have the opportunity, but
only them. Don’t get it twisted, I’m not saying you shouldn’t do
good deeds; I just want you to understand that in a cooperate
world like ours; people find rendering help unusual especially
help that wasn’t asked. So when you help people without being
asked, they always tend to believe you have strings attached.
Not only that they won’t value the help, but they’ll instead of
being grateful, be busy anticipating the strings behind the help.
Apart from little children and the very old, other set of people
you can help are; maybe, roadside beggars, people you know
you’ll never meet again or people you know they may never be
able to attain your level till they die. For the record, I’m not
saying you should render help to people you know are seriously
deep in need of help but are too scared or too confused to ask,
what I’m saying is that life has taught me that most help
rendered without being asked always backfire, and when it
does, it does with evil and regret. Most especially the ones you
render to your immediate environment. This was my dad’s 4 th
mistake.

SEMINARY
I entered St. Paul seminary Ukpor September 6 th 2000. According to
the entrance examination result, I was the best student in my set. I scored
100% in mathematics, 98% in English language and 95% in C.R.K. I was
among the top 3 during the interview, my dad was very proud of me, but
the problem was, I could be anything but cleric. At least, so I believed. I
couldn’t picture myself wearing a sutan all my life roaming the city in the
name of a faith doctor. My dad tried convincing me that not all that went
through the seminary ended up being priests; he said the most important
thing is the discipline and knowledge that will be inculcated in me. I didn’t
assent but with my dad’s advice, you don’t have a choice, it’s more of a
command than advice.

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 My first term in the seminary was hell; it was more of a military
school than a missionary school. We were controlled by bell and rod;
nobody tells you a word, the first instruction is the bell, the next is the
whip. We were made to go to class 3times in a day and the chapel 4times.
We were meant not to bring into the school any form of provision because
the school authority wouldn’t want us eating in between meals. Every meal
was provided by the school, catholic women actually. I had no parishioner, I
had no clique, I had not even a friend, just me and my frustrated world. I
got fed up with the too many dos and don’ts, got sick of the stress and I
started missing home. I told my parents I don’t want to school in the
seminary any longer, but they didn’t listen to me. I kept forming sick so I’d
be taken home, but my dad kept bringing me right back. I lost track and
started behaving abnormal, my mates will be in the class or chapel, I’ll be
gallivanting about the fields like a lost sheep whiling away my time. I kept
acting like a prisoner, I actually was; I kept feeling like a stranger, I actually
was. Nobody I could talk to, nobody will understand.
One major reason that made me hated the seminary all my stay there
is that we were deceived. When we came for the interview, we spent 3days,
the foods were very delicious, we were allowed to come with beverages
and the shop was filled with snacks, soft drinks, breads and biscuits to buy.
But when we resumed section, we were refused provisions, the foods were
no way near the former both in taste and size, and what was a tuck shop
became stationery cum sacramental. We weren’t given even a slightest idea
of what we’ll be going into, to them that’s discipline, but to me that’s
deception. I felt been lied to, and that’s my own sin against the spirit, the
sin that provokes me the most. Since my dad wouldn’t let me go peacefully
and honourable; I started plotting my own expulsion. Fighting in the
seminary was a case of expulsion, so I picked up fights every now and then.
Stealing was a case of expulsion but there wasn’t actually anything to steal.
One of the most heinous crimes in the seminary is leaving the school gate
without a signed permission or a free day. I’ll scale the fence or sometimes
even walk through the gate with confidence, buy provisions, mostly biscuits
and beef rolls, come back to school and sell them 10times the amount. I did
that with confidence and in the open because I was calling for expulsion.
Everybody knew I was sick and tired of being a seminarian, I’ll run home
many times but will be brought right back with whip. I was just there
wasting my time, counting days till one day I found a partner in crime.

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 LESSON 5: There are people who will be doing something, not
particularly a bad thing, yet they will always condemn it but will
never cease; they only condemn it to discourage others. Some will be
in a place, not particularly a bad place, they will always condemn it
but will never leave; they do so just to discourage others. Anything
you do, anywhere you are; you’ll always find people like that around
you. Don’t mingle with them; if you must do, don’t let them talk you
out. Once you fizzle out, they’ll beat their chest, go down on their
knees and thank God they aren’t as foolish as you are. This was my 1st
mistake.
One Sunday afternoon, Stanley, I’ve forgotten his surname, but also
seminarian, my classmate to be precise, approached me. He told me he
knew I was tired of being in the seminary; everybody knows that anyway,
he lamented on for long how he too was sick of the place and want out. I
was really wondering where the litany was heading to when he said that
the dean of studies was preparing names of student up for expulsion, and
it’s a golden opportunity for me. I missed the line, he didn’t say us; he said
me. I was too clouded with the word ‘EXPULSION’ that I lost my sense of
reasoning and value for prestige. He said if I really want to be expelled, I
should accept the fact we kissed on two different occasions, under the stair
case and in the class. I looked at him with mixed feelings, of bewilderment
that he has gone gaga and of anger that I was being insulted. I’ve never
imagined kissing a guy all my life not to talk of kissing Stanley. Stanley was
the dirtiest boy in our class, with a strong reputation of a very stinking
irritating mouth odour. Nobody will ever eat anything Stanley took a bite
from, or use a spoon he used even if it has already been washed. The mere
thought of kissing Stanley made me want to puke yet the thought of being
expelled made me lost my track. If this is my only way out of this hell, so be
it. This was my judgement, this was my doom.
LESSON 6: Don’t ever bear false witness whether against yourself
or someone else. Even if you’re angry, under durex, hatred,
jealousy or any other thing, don’t ever bear false witness. It’s
among the sins that cry to God for vengeance. It’s against karma
and it must surely someday catch up with you. My dad told me
that if you want to be successful in life, give every man his due,
never break a promise or a bond, don’t have sexual intercourse
with a married woman, don’t bear false witness, work hard and
pray hard, and God will always meet me at the point of my need.

7
 Plus, don’t ever venture into anything because others are doing it
or because it’ll fetch you money. Always follow your heart, do that
which makes you happy and keeps you satisfied. Follow your
passion and success will chase you down the lane. This was my 2 nd
mistake, accepting a crime, worse still, a sin I didn’t commit just
because I was tired of the seminary.
The next day, the dean of called me for questioning, and I, having
been born to be the destroyer of my own life, accepted a crime I didn’t
commit and was expelled from the seminary. Little did I know that that was
the beginning of my very end; and for some reasons I couldn’t understand;
Stanley wasn’t expelled. It didn’t bother me because I didn’t ask for his
expulsion, I only asked for mine and I got it.
One experience I’ll never forget was one time in the seminary, during
prayers, everybody was in the chapel praying; I was reluctant to pray with
others so I hid at the back of the toilet. I was sitting there all alone, deep in
thought about the kind of miserable life I was leading then, when our
spiritual director then walked into me. I didn’t understand what a priest,
spiritual director for heaven’s sake, is doing at the back of boys’ toilet
during prayers. He didn’t understand what a human being in his right
senses is doing sitting at the back of a toilet a goat couldn’t withstand its
stench for 10minutes. After minutes of ponder from both of us, he shouted
my name; instead responding to him, I ran away. Later that night, he sent
for me. When I came, he told me to go fetch the others. According to him, he
didn’t want to punish us but counsel us on the importance of prayers. I
stood there moping, groping like a granulated Egyptian mummy; I was
looking at him like he had gone psycho. When he saw I didn’t move, he
beckoned on me to; with the clarification we won’t be punished. Out of
confusion, I told him angrily that there were no others, I have no friends
and I talk to nobody, it was just lonely me pondering my lonely me. With
feelings so mixed with disappointment and disgrace, he asked me if I was
telling him to his face, with all impunity, that I was the only one sitting
there as at the time he saw me, I replied yes with all sincerity. He angrily
sent me out of his office. At the door, I overheard him telling the auxiliary
teacher assign to him that he couldn’t understand why some students are
just so incorrigible and blatant liars. He said we were 3 when he saw us, we
were sitting down but what marvelled him was that nobody was talking,
we were just sitting there looking into the sky. According to him, I was
wearing a school uniform, which I really was wearing, but the other two

8
weren’t. He said they may not even have being students. He instructed
24hrs surveillance on me, said he has a hunch I might be up to something
funny. I retired to my class wondering why my spiritual director would
cook up such a cock and bull story against me.
LESSON 7: Don’t be too quick to judge; don’t be in a haste to say
something is a lie. There are always three sides to a story; your
version, their version and the truth. Sometimes, your version
might be the truth, sometimes it might be theirs. But two truths
can never contradict, when it does, either of the versions is a lie
or most times the two versions. But for every lie, there’s always
an iota of truth or total insanity. People may exaggerate, lie to
protect themselves, build lies around truth, but nobody wakes up
one morning and start spreading lies. Well, I can’t deny the fact
that sometimes people who seek cheap popularity or cash spread
lies, like those who said that they’ve died, went to heaven and
hell and are back. Well, the truth therein is that they are totally
insane, but more insane are those who actually believed them.
The spiritual director was too quick to judge me, if he had slowed
a bit, studied his story and the event, he would’ve found out I had
no reason to lie. Everybody in the school knows his reputation of
not punishing students, no matter your offence; he’ll give you just
prayers. I on my side had nothing to lose, the punishment for
dodging prayers is expulsion and that had being my prayer point
since ages. My own mistake was that of negligence, it was my 3 rd
mistake. I overlooked the whole story, concluding that a priest
who has no reason to lie against me, had something up against
me. I was too quick to judge, it’s in us human to always blame
whenever we fail or encounter matters we can’t handle. If only I
had pondered the story a bit, I would’ve prayed and ask God for
the meaning of the story. The spiritual director would’ve done
same too. But while we blamed each other, the truth remained
untold, and the mysteries unfold.
Our rector always warned us that we should always pray never to be
expelled from the seminary for good or for bad, by our own making or
nature designed. He said that once you’re expelled from the seminary, you
leave with a curse. You either suffer for a very long time if not the rest of
your life, or turn out to be a rogue. I didn’t realise how true this was till I
got myself expelled.

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 LESSON 8: Two things I learnt from the seminary are: 1. the
Catholic Church does not give you benefit of doubt, you give
the church benefit of doubt. 2. Catholic priests are not ordained
based on spirituality, but based on intelligence and discipline.
No matter how holy and spiritual a seminarian is, if he doesn’t
pass his exams under the standard of the seminary, even if he
has the calling, he’ll never be ordained, he’ll be expelled.
Catholic priests are trained very intelligently, but just to be
capable to defend the catholic faith and not explore or
understand it. That’s why all catholic priests study philosophy,
so as to be able to explain, define and defend every catholic
dogma, doctrine and teachings. As a seminarian or a priest, in
spite the fact you studied philosophy to become a free thinker,
grounded in logic and metaphysics, you dare not question or
counter the catholic teachings. That’s why the Catholic Church
is more of a traditional church than a spiritual church. I don’t
have anything against the Catholic Church, I was born and a
bred a catholic and I still have reverence for the church till
date. I’m just citing for the church an area of mperity. I’ve
explored Christianity outside Catholicism, and I’ve had a taste
of spirituality. Most Catholics nowadays, while retaining their
catholic faith, go outside the Catholic Church in search of
spirituality. Let me not talk just about the Catholic priests,
aside the Catholic Church, I’ve come to discover that most
pastors, not just pastors, most religious leaders attain so much
spirituality that they forget educational standard, thereby
misleading the people. BOTTOM LINE: every religious leader
should be both spiritual and educated as Christ was, so we can
bridge the leaks in Christendom.

ST. CHARLES
I entered St. Charles college J.S.2 3 rd term, May, 2002. I started very
well, worked very hard and was able to fix into the school system because I
saw faces I knew, I met people I knew from my hometown. We got along
nicely, formed our clique and associated very happily. My academic
performance improved drastically; I, who used to be among the last in the
seminary, turned out one of the best students again. My friend once teased

10
that it’s because I degenerated from the school for intellects to a school for
duns; but the truth is, I was more whole and hearty, I felt freer and happier
than I was in the seminary. I represented St. Charles in an exam
competition organized by the Nigerian society of engineers, Anambra
Chapter, I was 1st in mathematics and 2nd in introductory technology and I
was issued certificates for that. My first academic result in St. Charles was
far better than my last result in the seminary. In my last academic result in
the seminary, I took 108th position, while in St. Charles, I took the 2 nd
position. My J.S.2 days in St. Charles were really very juicy, void of troubles
and for the first time since high school, I was happy I was in high school.
My J.S.3 days were going on smoothly as well, at least in the
beginning, I was recognized as the best in my class, and was the only
student who was nominated to represent the school in the annual cowbell
competition. Yes, my J.S.3 days was really going very smoothly and juicy till
something happened. I was reading with other students during night prep
one day when Chimezie, an S.S.3 boy who hailed from my hometown and
who was supposed to be one of our guardians came for me. I thought he
wanted to send me on an errand or maybe beg for provision as other
seniors do sometimes so I followed him innocently. He took me to the S.S.3
hostel, in one of the cubicles, and to my greatest surprise, started molesting
me. He tried kissing me but I keep moving my head sideways, I was too
shocked to fight, too scared to shout, too irritated to even breathe. His
mouth was smelly very foully of okra soup, cigar rete, and local gin. I
wanted to puke but my muscles were too devastated to move. When he saw
how my body was shaking and how I wasn’t kissing back, he knew I wasn’t
game, he knew I hadn’t been in this kind situation before, but the worst is,
he knew I couldn’t tell. He looked at me awhile as a predator would look its
prey before devouring; rubbed a cream on my thighs, in between my legs,
and started thrusting his penis in between them. It was the most disgusting
experience I’ve ever had all my life. While he was at it, I was pondering
many things, pondering if this was punishment for the way I expelled
myself form the seminary, pondering if this mess will ever repeat itself,
pondering if I’ll ever get my life back, pondering the next step from there. I
wept bitterly in the inside while my heart bled, if this happened just a year
or two later than it did, it would’ve been murder, a murder I’ll never regret
or repent from till I die. After a couple of minutes, I felt hot liquid spill on
laps, he wiped his penis with my shirt, wore his pants, told me to wear
mine and get out. I was still in shock, too shocked to move. In fact, I was
moving, actually running in my mind but my body couldn’t move. When he
11
saw I wasn’t moving, he felt threatened, gave me hot slap and shouted on
me to get out of here before somebody comes in. That was when my eyes
brought the tears of my heart, I wore my pants, and cried out of the hostel.
My temperature rose very high but I was so cold, too cold to talk to
anybody, I only walked to my bunk to sleep, just that sleep was too far from
my eyes. That night, my clique knew I wasn’t me, but they all thought
maybe I was flogged or something. That night, so many thoughts ran my
head. I thought of committing suicide but decided against it because of my
mum. I thought of going home but home was already very angry with me
since seminary. I thought of reporting to the school authority but was too
scared given that he or his classmates will make my life miserable should
the punishment be grievous, plus S.S3 boys are always in the habit of giving
a false alibi to any of their class mates who committed, so he might deny.
With all these thoughts, I fainted into my bed.
LESSON 9: One major problem in Nigeria is that kids are always
too scared or too ashamed to report abuse meted on them. I’ve
come to realise that it’s not really actually their fault, it’s how
they were raised. Most African parents, especially Nigerian
mothers use shouts and beatings on their children. So the children
live on the edge and in fear. Parents, the more you shout and beat
your child, the more you destroy the life. You'll either make him
grow and lead the rest of his life in fear, or you turn him into a
hardened kid that nothing will ever move him. In the rural areas,
in the street, there are little teens that are called ‘KPOS’. It means
that they are cheerful givers; you just call them, don’t say a word,
just pull their pants and start having canal knowledge of them.
The truth is, they’re not actually cheerful givers, there are not
even givers at all but they’re too scared to fight. They’ve been
beaten and shouted upon many times that they give in to
anything when it comes with a loud voice. If you want to know if
it’s really from mind, tell them to go and come and back later,
they won’t. Call them with a soft and romantic voice, plead with
them, they won’t give in; but command them with a harsh voice
and they will give in. They will continue like that till they reach
the age when they can fight back. There are many of them in
secondary schools, seniors take advantage of them. Children,
please don’t be too scared or too ashamed to report any form of
abuse on you. Even if it’s your teacher or senior in school, your
parents, house help, uncle or auntie at home, or one stupid boy
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 on the street. Parents and teachers in school have being treating
sex education so wrongly those teenage girls even some mature
ladies are always ashamed when being raped. They are too
ashamed to shout for help during the raped and too ashamed to
report after rape. Believe me dearie, it’s only when you voice out
you’ll realize that your abuser is more scared and more ashamed
than you were. Besides, if you don’t report, you’ll bear the heavy
burden all your life while you die in silence. But, if you voice out
and watch your abuser pay for his crime, only then will you feel
relieved, find internal peace and be able to move on with your life.
Please ladies and children always voice out, this was my 4 th
mistake. If the abuse was in school, report to the school authority
or at home; if it was at home, report to the school or your church
or even the police station. If worse comes to worst, report to me, I
have a female angel who can help you.
I woke up the next morning without the feels to go to class; I took my
bath, dressed up and started roaming about the street. After couple of days
of truancy and nursing my injured, I was gradually recovering and getting
over the incidence, I came into the class during night prep, and was told
that senior Chimezie had looking for me. My heart stopped beating for
some seconds, before I could say anything I saw him appear at the door like
a ghost, like he smelled me from afar. He pointed his hands towards me, but
before he could say the word ‘come’, I vanished through the window into
the thin air. I slept in the field that night amidst cold and danger. My
classmates noticed that I no longer come to class any longer, that I don’t
even sleep in the hostel anymore; they got worried but couldn’t help. The
Ceiling of my classroom became my hostel, and my housemates were rats,
bats cats and every other rodent that ends with at, but I preferred them to
the demon downstairs. Besides, they are always benevolent enough to
always excuse me anytime I’m around. School became frustrating, my
teachers and classmates started sending messages home that I no longer
come to class, that I’ve given in to truancy. They don’t have the slightest
idea what I was going through; they didn’t know how much of a fugitive I’ve
become in my own school.
One sunny day, during classes, while others were in the class
studying, I was out in the field all alone. I was sitting in an untended farm
which served as my hideout because it was somehow bushy. I was very
hungry, angry and tired. I was just sitting there eyes wide open, looking but

13
not seeing anything. I heard a noise, something sort of a whisper, then I saw
movement in the grass, something was approaching me. Lo and behold it
was a snake, a very big one at that. I was too hungry, too tired and too
shocked to move, there was nothing I could do so I only sat watched. But to
my greatest surprise, the snake stopped and started looking at me too. We
looked at each other for about 30seconds, when a prayer I couldn’t make
out its origin came into mind and I prayed silently; ‘O YOU SERPENT, O YOU
WISDOM OF OLD. GIVE ME YOUR WISDOM, I CALL ON THEE. GIVE ME
YOUR STRENGHT AND MIGHT, GIVE ME YOUR POWER AND YOUR VENOM,
THAT MY ENEMIES I COULD DESTROY. After about a couple of seconds,
maybe minutes, the snake lowered its head, wore off its scale and crawled
away.
LESSON 10: Everybody encounters problems at one point or
the other in life, problem doesn’t know gender or age; it has
no time or season, it doesn’t seek permission or consent. It
comes to anybody and everybody at any time in any place it
pleases. But the good news is, there’s no problem you
encounter in your life others haven’t encountered, one or two
people had in the past or maybe even in the presented found
their selves in your present situation. And like the bible says,
God can never let a problem you can’t handle come to you.
There are just two approach to problems; leave it and run or
face it and win. When you find yourself in a difficult situation,
say to your trembling heart ‘IT IS WELL’ and face your worst
fear. Funny enough, it is when we face our problem, will we
realize that most of the things we call problems are not even
problems at all. When we face our fears and tackle our
problem, we’ll see solutions fallout from nowhere. Never run
from problems because no matter how far you run, it’ll
always catch up with you. Worse still you may see yourself
running into a bigger problem. We are all in the same game
just different levels; we’re all living in the same hell just
dealing with different devils.
I stood up, picked the scale, wore it round my neck and started
working towards the hostel. Students who saw me got frightened; some ran
while some chanted my name. My eyes were heavy and very bloody; my
body was hot from my boiling blood. I walked into the hostel, tied the scale
around my bed post and slept off. I slept for a very long time, I even slept

14
into the next day and was surprised nobody came to disturb me; no senior
came to flog me. I slept like a newly born. I woke up the next morning, took
my bath dressed up and was ready for class. I didn’t know what to do with
the scale; I chopped it into a cup of tea and drank it. It was just a week into
the school examination and two days into the cowbell competition I was
nominated for. Because nobody had seen me for many weeks, another boy,
Vincent, was prepared for the competition. But when I came back, students
still preferred I go for the competition. The school authorities decided to
set questions for the boy and I; I beat him hands down and was nominated
again, but I took ill that same day and was admitted into the hospital for
4days, so Vincent represented us. School exams came and went, I wrote
mine sick, yet I did well because I had 10’A’s and 2’C’s. when I got home, my
parents were very surprised because my result contradicted the reports
they were getting from school. I laughed, I laughed because it was only me
and my God knew what I was going through, but it doesn’t matter much
anymore because I’m home now. Things died down, holiday was cool, it
was Easter, so I enjoyed my life away. I forgot about school for a while,
forgot about all my troubles and forgot about the beast called Chimezie.
3rd term J.S.3 was my worst in St. Charles, I was bitter and hostile, I
wasn’t that little angel who just came out the seminary any more, not that
there was actually anything angelic with my stay in the seminary. I snubbed
every senior that sent me on any stupid errand like fetch water or wash
plate. If you send me to go and buy anything for you, you won’t see me
again and you won’t see your money. As a result of that, I was on the run;
many senior students were looking for me, with the intention of skinning
me alive. One evening, I was sitting at the step of the lower field thinking
about my ugly life when someone tapped me at the shoulder. I turned
around and it was Chimezie, this time I wasn't scared, just pissed. He told
me that everybody was looking for me even ‘ejima’, a student everybody
dreaded the most including the principal and students. He told me I should
run or worry no more that he’ll protect me. He took me, held by the hand so
I wouldn’t run, to an uncompleted building, told me to zip down while he
reached his pocket for his cream. It was then that it dawned on me I wasn’t
the only one, there are other students experiencing same trauma but are
also too scared to voice out. It was then I realized that this bastard, while
his mates are in the class studying, he roams about the school with cream
in his pocket looking for a junior student to molest. I reached my pocket for
a pair of compass, stabbed him 3times, on the neck, cheek and shoulder,
and fled while he shouted and bled in pains.
15
 While I roamed the street; dirty and wretched, so confused with the
idea of where to go, what to do or make of my wretched life, I met another
student on the run like me. I didn’t know his real name for he was
popularly known as mechanic, mecha for short, because he was always
dirty. Mecha was the most bullied and jeered boy in school, his own case
was worse because he was mocked and bullied even by his own classmates.
Because he wasn’t smart in class, coupled with his problems, he became
tired of school, and gave in to roaming the street. We met and became
partners, not friends, just partners, and he took me to places I never would
have imagined. Mecha was born and still lives in Onitsha, so he knew many
places, he knew the nooks and cranny of the city, if Onitsha is ever a city. He
took me to ‘mammi’ market were sex was almost free, he took me to a
centre where we played video games, he converted my truancy into
adventure at the expense of my time. In the night, we’ll sleep at oga
Charlie’s shop, a man who sells pepper soup and agidi opposite school gate.
LESSON 11: If your kid or ward runs out of home more than
once, it’s because; 1. He knows you’ll come looking him almost
immediately, or 2. There’s someone out there who’s giving him
comfort. There are people who delight in harbouring runaway
kids because they take advantage of them. If the society
doesn’t find them first and put them away, the kids will locate
them and remain wasted away. The reason your little
daughter confidently runs out of home is because a stupid man
like oga Charlie is giving her shelter and food but will turn her
into a sex toy. If your kid, whether boy or girl, stays out of
home more than a night, try find out where she passed the
night, because that’s where she’ll run to again, that’s what will
give her the confidence to run away again.
When we came back in the night, at around 11pm, we saw two girls,
S.S.1 students from Ado girls’ secondary school, hanging around the corner.
They ran out of school and were seeking shelter like us, one the girls had
been brought to sleep in oga Charlie’s shop before by a friend who wasn’t
with them now, so they were scared to knock. Mecha knocked on the door
so confidently like it was his father’s house and like it was just 7pm, and
oga Charlie opened the door and took us in. To my surprise, he didn’t even
ask who we were; he took us all in, even with excitement. They took the
bed while I made myself at home on the cushion. It was not even up to
20minutes, I hadn’t even closed my eyes when the girls began to moan out

16
of excitement of sex. I then realised why oga Charlie, a married man would
opt sleeping in the shop instead of beside his heavily pregnant wife at
home. While they were at it, I lay, pondering the kind of fugitive life I was
leading as of late, I made a resolution to go have a talk with my dad. I made
up my mind that at the break of the day, I’ll go home to my father and
narrate my ordeal, perhaps, he’ll help me back on track on the right lane
and help me put Chimezie away for good. I was about gaining some sleep
when I felt a hand rubbing my legs, I wanted to kick the hand but there was
something different about this hand, it was soft and tender, it was feminine.
It wasn’t long before I noticed it was one of the girls, the one that was
supposed to be with mecha. She started smoking my pipe and before I
could do anything she was already on top of me, riding me like one of those
ladies you see on a blue movie. I wasn’t in on the ride, not because I was a
saint, no, I wasn’t even a virgin at the time, but because I had bigger fishes
to fry, I’ve got heavy thoughts on my head. The mood I was in, I could’ve
pushed her but the tiredness of the day mixed with pleasure of the ride
made me too weak to even say a word. I was just there moping at her with
just one thought on my head, not a thought that the ride was raw and I
could contract or she could take in, not the thought of what made two
beautiful young girls opt to sleep in a shop and have sex with the two
dirtiest people I knew of then than be in school on their comfortable bed,
but the thought of if this girl is like this at S.S.1, what will become of her in
5years to come. It was like she was on me for eternity because she was still
on me when I dozed off.
The next morning, as early as before they could wake up, I opened
the door and started for home. It was a trek from one town to another, it
was a very long trek but I was willing to do it and I did it. I got to my house
at about 10am, couldn’t find the key, so I waited outside patiently for
someone to come home. I didn’t know my parents were looking for me, in
fact the whole school and my neighbourhood were looking for me. My dad
was on his way to the police station when someone told him he saw me
that I’m at home then. I was waiting patiently hoping the prodigal parable
was true, it was actually a parable not applicable to an African father. When
I saw my dad coming, I was so relieved, I felt very much alive, I experienced
the feels of the apostles when they finally saw Jesus after being locked up in
fear in the upper room for God knows how long, so I hoped on telling him
everything. Contrary to the parable, I didn’t see open arms. What I saw was
a fury eyes burning of anger, frustration and disappointment. Where are
you coming from, where have you being, what is wrong with you, what has
17
come over you, these questions weren’t polite at all neither were they
warm; they were so cold, colder than ice and were coming from my dad
who was a no nonsense man as of then, was ought to have being military.
As my dad drew near, I knew it wouldn’t just be the questions, but before I
could respond to stimulus, hells of slaps and beatings were already raining
on my every part of my body. At that moment, I wished I were with mecha
and the two girls, I wished I didn’t stress myself trekking so hard for so
long just to be beaten, I wished I was there feeding with the swine than
arising and returning back to my father.
LESSON 12: To every parent and godly guidian, if your child or
ward starts degenerating academically, or start losing the
enthusiasm or interest to go to school, especially if he’s a very
bright student, know that something is very wrong somewhere.
Something, sometimes, they are not willing or ready to tell.
Please I implore you with everything you respect and adore,
don’t punish the kid with brutality, rather investigate him with
love. Ask around, go to the school, ask for his close friends, if
possible, send him a counsellor, someone who knows how to
treat and understand the misdemeanours of kids. If all efforts
seem abortive, then change school for him. When my kid
brother entered Christ the King College Onitsha, he was doing
very ok and his results were flying as always. But by J.S.2, his
academic performing started dropping drastically to a point it
was nothing to write home about. My dad, who always frowns
at failure very irritatingly, got very mad, he kept asking what’s
wrong but couldn’t get any answer, he scolded and beat him
but to no avail; his result kept deteriorating every term. I
suggested change of school for him, that was the first time if
not the only time my suggestion was heeded as a kid, and he
was transferred to Maris Brothers Nteje, where he graduated
as the best student with flying colours. Till date, nobody knows
what happened to him; till this book, nobody knew why I was
tired of school during my secondary days.
After beating me mercilessly, he gave me food, I ate and slept, sleep is
one of the many things I hadn’t had well for a long time then. My dad might
be mean and bossy, but he’s a very caring man. He’s the most caring man I
have ever met in my whole life, he can never be found in a hotel or beer
parlour, he has just a pair of shoes, just one piece of suit and a few shirts.

18
He washes every day to keep up with cleanliness, yet, the poverty doesn’t
tell on his children. Simple little commodities like tissue, match box,
bathing soap, kerosene and water has never been found lacking in my
home. We still have our normal 3squared just that the quality of the meals
kept deteriorating over time. None of us has ever been sent home before
for not paying school fees, neither had we ever looked tattered or unkempt.
Yet, for over 10years, my dad hadn’t worked, he hadn’t earned a dime as
salary or wage; my mum said he quitted his job. According to my mum, he
always quit jobs out of anger, now he’s on anger therapy by being jobless,
at the expense of his children. According to mum, he quitted the last job
because his boss made a transaction he didn’t support, he was the financial
controller, yet, his boss didn’t take his advice, so he quitted. My dad is so
addicted to orderliness and obsessed with success, that he handles other
people’s businesses like they were his, no business or company will fold
under his watch. He once lost his job because he refused to sign a document
already approved by his boss to buy a car for his 21year old girlfriend from
the company’s fund.
LESSON 13: After many years of hustling in the street and
dealing with the rich, I came to understand that the power of
every rich man is the ability to do anything that pleases him.
Every rich man feels inferior and to some extent insulted if he
wants something and couldn’t have it. And no rich man will do
anything that doesn’t benefit him or gives him satisfaction only
pleasure gives. My dad will always carry the weight of others,
drinking Panadol for else’s headache. If you want to be rich and
remain rich, worry yourself only with the things that benefit you
or affects you. Don’t kill yourself over things that literally don’t
concern you. The philanthropists you know today give for just
two reasons; 1. Some run foundations to keep away from tasks
and the eyes of the government from the illegal business they
run. 2. Others derive satisfaction from giving. Some people derive
the satisfaction of being blessed when they give, so they give.
Others derive pleasure; the same pleasure people derive from sex,
while some people derive it from making others suffer, some
derive it by helping others. If you get help from a poor, he’s
helping because he’s hoping tomorrow if the table were to turn
round, you’ll retaliate. If you get help from a rich, he’s not
helping you because you’re in need, he’s helping you because he
just want to get satisfied. BOTTOM LINE: Don’t clinch yourself on
19
 a rich dude, suffering yourself to impress him, thinking he’ll help
you out of pity or love; you’re wasting your time. If you don’t
have anything to offer, if you have nothing he can tap or benefit
from, then you’re more useless than his sewage. Don’t try
stopping a rich man from the actions he wants to take for fun,
he’ll see you a kill joy and will get rid of you. I’m not saying you
shouldn’t advise, advise only when he asks for your advice or
when you’re as rich as he is.
I understood my dad’s pain, I understood his anger, I understood that
after borrowing to pay my school fees, instead of being in the class, I
roamed the street. But he didn’t understand me, he didn’t see my
predicament, he didn’t know my ordeal, his judgement was clouded by my
seminary experience, now he believes I just don’t want to go to school
anymore. Because there are many truants living around us, he thought I
was heeding their counsel and following their lead, he didn’t bother to ask
questions or investigate, he only felt disappointed in me. When I woke up,
he gave me 2,000naira to go back to school; just that there was no school, it
was just hell, so the only place I could go was to search out my partner. As
the devil may have it, immediately I alighted the bus, the first person I saw
was mecha. He was so glad to see me, he told me the evening was going to
be hot because there will be harvest and bazaar in ‘iba pope’ a Catholic
Church there in Onitsha; that means more girls, more fun and more pranks.
Honestly, at that moment I didn’t know who to curse, my dad that sent me
back to school, the demon that sent me out of school, or the idiot who
standing before me tattling nonsense. As the case was, I was out of options;
I couldn’t go back home, it spelled lashes; I couldn’t go to school, it spelled
trouble; the only option left was to follow mecha like a lamb ready for
sacrifice and I did. Mecha was so excited that he was walking with steps
almost like dancing steps, I asked him time of the bazaar and he said 8pm; I
couldn’t help but wonder what on earth we’ll be doing and where on earth
we’ll be from 3pm till 8pm. I felt a bit of pleasure, any adolescence with
boiling hormones and in my condition will feel same way.
After walking aimlessly for 20minutes, I was forced to ask where we
were going; the I don’t know answer pricked me like a sharp needle
piercing my heart. I’m this kind of person that always knows what he does,
good or bad, at least I always have a bearing. I didn’t know what to say to
him, if I really knew where else to go or what to do; I would’ve left him that
moment. We walked and talked till we got to a place where many students

20
from different schools and area boys who weren’t in school gathered and
were gambling. I didn’t know if we got there by chance, or if mecha actually
knew we were coming there, but his countenance suggested he knew; for
he said, now we can kill time. I was surprised and lost, I was so bewildered
at the number of students who left their various schools for different
reasons, and while their parents thought they were in school, they’re here
wasting away. I cried in the inside, not for me but for them and their
parents; in order not to be a kill joy, I comported myself and joined the
groove. I betted with the money my dad gave me, I thought I was only
whiling away time, I never knew I just embarked on a journey into the
world of gamble addiction. I made extra 1,800naira that day, I was happy
but mecha was happier. We left around 6.45pm happy and joyful but my
3hours there taught me a lifetime lesson.
LESSON 14: There are 3 things that drive students away from
school, 3 things that make students while their mates are in
school; they’re in the street looking for comfort, looking for their
likes to draw hope from. Parents, teachers and counsellors think
it is peer group but it’s not. Until these issues are addressed,
many students will keep wasting away their secondary school
days. The 3 things are;
1. PASSION: There are students who are passion driven,
students whose dreams and passion burn like a wild fire and
it has nothing to do with the classroom or so they believe. In
Nigeria today, 80% of students who are outside the
classroom are passion driven, and 75% of them are driven by
football and music. Students who have passion or dream to
become footballers, musicians, movie stars, comedians,
models, politicians or even business personnel, have little or
no interest in the classroom. A student who wants to become
a footballer would want to be in the field not in the
classroom, he would value football boots and jerseys more
than text books. A student who wants to become a musician
will want to be in a studio not a classroom. A student who
wants to become a movie star will dread and prepare more
for an audition than an examination. A student who wants
to become a comedian will prefer an open mic to certificate.
A student who wants to become a model will want to pose for
the camera not teachers. A student who wants to become a

21
business man will want to count stocks not marks. In the end,
they are all pissed with the classrooms and its teachers who
kept saying things they care not about. It is in the nature of
man to strive towards his ambitions, to fight for that that’ll
give him the inner most satisfaction; so they’ll always go for
their passion not certificate. African parents especially
Nigerians kill the destiny and the future of their children by
themselves. A child will be delivered by 10.00am and by
10.02am the parents will declare him an engineer, a medical
doctor, or a lawyer etc. not considering if that’s what the
child will really want to be. I can’t fail to highlight the
importance of formal education in this civilised society and
our modernised world, and the fact that every parent wants
his child to become formally educated; but if that child
happens to be passion driven, don’t kill him; reach a
compromise. If your kid wants to be a footballer, encourage
him but give him targets. Enrol him into a football academy
where he’ll get to train in the evenings maybe twice or thrice
a week plus weekends, buy him football boots and jerseys but
set for him an aggregate he mustn’t be below academically.
If he wants to be a musician, grant him studio sessions but
set for him an academic target also. Tell your passion driven
kid if he doesn’t meet up your academic standards, his
passion sessions will be withdrawn and you’ll be surprised
how excellently he’ll soar academically because it determines
his passion. But if you try to kill his dreams, sour his passions
and force him into school, he’ll lose out completely; he
wouldn’t go to school and he wouldn’t actualize his dreams.
He’ll run to the street and the street will turn him into a
monster, in the end, you and the society will suffer it. Parents
please don’t ever try to kill the passion of kids no matter how
unproductive you imagine it to be. Michael Jackson,
Leonardo da Vinci, Tiger Woods, Arnold Schwarzenegger,
Lionel Messi, Chinua Achebe etc., they changed the world not
with the value of x, but actualization of their dreams and the
materialization of their passion. Dear God please bless all
those who by the works of their hands or the words of their
mouth people are encouraged and made happy.

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2. INTELLIGENCE: Intelligence capacity is a major factor that
keeps kids in or out of classroom. When a kid is super
intelligent, everything taught in class always seem simple
and easy. The joy of learning is the anxiety of being taught a
new thing, but when the teacher is teaching, because he
understands it very quickly and so easily, he’ll have this funny
feeling he’s being taught what he ought to have known or
worse still already knew, and as such, being in class is just a
waste of time. So he’ll go outside his classroom in search of
what seem to him a new knowledge; sometimes, to a class
above his grade, to the library but worse times, to the street.
At times, the kid will ask the teacher questions on what is
being taught, the teacher wouldn’t be able to answer to his
satisfaction, the kid feels down and develops a crazy feeling
to go out and do something better. I know this from
experience, no teacher had ever answered my questions in
the class to my satisfaction; rather they always send me out
of class. Parents, if your child is super intelligent, don’t send
him to a regular school; send him to a technical school or a
school for the gifted where brains will meet. Even the bible
says only iron can sharpen iron. When a kid is academically
dull, everything the teacher teaches seems bizarre, it’ll seem
the teacher is speaking in a foreign language he doesn’t
understand, he’ll get confused and frustrated, he’ll leave the
class for leisure he understands. It’s a pity the Nigerian
system of education breeds only average students, I don’t
know if it’s the system or the teachers, well, it’s both. The
teachers are so half baked they couldn’t bring the very
intelligent students to line, and they are so incompetent,
inconsiderate and impatient they leave their dull students
behind. The system is so biased and blind they don’t see this
problem.
3. PRESSURE: Most teens are incapable of dealing with
pressure; peer pressure, psychological pressure,
environmental pressure, emotional pressure, social pressure,
religious pressure, educational pressure, but all boils down to
mental pressure. The bad news is, when a kid is under
pressure, who does he talk to; nobody. Our half-baked
teachers know better how to use the cane than the brain. Any

23
 student who always sleeps in the class or is outside the
classroom during classes is burdened, he’s either frustrated
or dejected and it can come from home, school or church, but
all boils down to the environment. Some are not living with
their real parents so are maltreated, some might be sexually
or humanly molested. But they are always psychologically or
emotionally unbalanced, burdened by factors beyond their
control, so they lose out. Only teachers who have sense of
mentorship or parenthood will understand enough to draw
the kid closer, make friends with him and get him to talk.
We happily went back to oga Charlie to have fun, to celebrate over
plates of pepper soup and palm wine, when we got there; we met our ladies
already ready for the night. I bought pepper for the four of us, we drank
palm wine and by 8pm, we left for iba pope. We had fun there, ate and
drank, I played more gamble and won more money, and we all went back to
oga Charlie’s shop some minutes after midnight. Oga Charlie wasn’t around,
but we knew where the key was, no, Mecha knew, we opened the door, laid
the cartons and you can guess what happened next. I never knew Oga
Charlie was married; the worse was I never knew he was bisexual. Mecha
was close to him, Mecha knew where the key was because he was abusing
Mecha. I couldn’t tell if it was abuse or mutual because Mecha needed
shelter and food which oga Charlie provided. Whichever one it was, Mecha
was disgusting.
My life continued wasting away; I gradually started getting addicted
to gambling, from gambling to drinking and smoking, to sleeping in shops.
Everybody was looking for me, story went home I was lost and it got
mummy crying every day and daddy always in deep thought. Daddy had
come to understand that it’s not everything shouting and beating can solve.
He went to a priest, Fr. Gabriel Okafor and told him everything; Fr. Gab told
him it’s not ordinary, gave him some psalm to read and some prayers and
promised to pray along with him too. After 4days, I was in a game shop
playing play station one, when one of my teachers came in to look for
change. He photocopied some documents in the next door shop and had no
change to give so he came in for some help. After collecting the change, he
was about leaving when the devil turned his eyes towards me, I was
surprised how he recognised me given the fact I was on disguise. He called
my name but I didn’t respond, so he angrily shouted my surname and I
turned. He asked if I wasn’t the one everyone was looking for, I replied no,

24
it was my twin brother, I’m here also in search of him; I’m only pretending
to play game but hoping he shows up, he bought the story and left. Instead
of me to leave, I having been addicted to the money I was making, still sat
there playing not knowing my mum was in school. For obvious reason,
master Akwue, that was the teacher’s name, told my mum he saw my twin
brother opposite school gate, waiting hoping he could find me, my mum
cried I am no twin it was me and they all ran coming to get me. The
moment master Akwue left the shop, I knew I was busted, I knew I should
get going, but the game, the money, they kept me, I was still playing when
they rushed in. My mum, some teachers and a few students mostly my
clique from home, tears were dropping off my mum’s cheeks, she was a
teacher, she still is, she left her school, left her classes, risked her job to
come look for her black sheep. I felt for her, tears rolled my cheeks too, she
embraced me, with words so soft and kind she said, it is ok son, let’s go
home.
This was less than a week to Junior Secondary School Certificate
Examination, I didn’t even know my exam number or class, but I was put
through within few days. For over two months, I didn’t enter any
classroom, open any book or raise any biro, but I wrote the exam. My result
was way too below my standard, I got 3‘A’s and 9‘C’s. Nobody knew I was
even going to sit for the exams at all not to talk of crediting all. I entered
30minutes after each paper commenced and run out 30minutes before
time up for the fear of Ejima, yet I scaled through. My J.S S session came and
went, I went home and life went on.
LESSON 15: One thing I learnt from gambling is that all
gamblers are losers. No matter how much you think you win
and no matter the kind of gamble it is even if it's lotto and
lottery, you’ll always lose in the end. Gamble money is like a
stolen money, if you win today even if it is one million naira,
gamble tradition, you’ll share to people and squander the rest
like the money comes every day and in no time, you’ll get
broke again; the day you’ll lose, you’ll lose so woefully like it’s
the end of your life. It is better you get addicted to drinking
and smoking than gambling, though all will lead you to an
early grave, but while one is slow and painless, the other is
fast, painful and full of regrets. BOTTOM LINE: DON’T EVER
GAMBLE.

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 One incidence I’ll never forget in St. Charles is when one of my
classmates named Nonso, called me ‘LEGION’; it wasn’t the first time he
called me that. Nonso is one gentle student revered by other students,
because he has this special gift that everything he says in his moody mood
comes to pass. Nobody understands why because Nonso is neither religious
nor a saint; in fact, when I hadn’t even had the mind to smoke, Nonso was
the only smoker in our class, he was very rough and liked women a lot. But,
if Nonso enters his moody mood, he says something and it comes to pass. In
our J.S.S.3 second term in school, Nonso told one boy, I have forgotten his
name, on one fateful day that if he ever played football that day, he’ll never
play football again in his life. The boy was adamant, he ignored and insulted
Nonso and he played football that day. Ten minutes into the game, the boy
fell from the upper field to the lower field, he seriously dislocated his leg
that it took him many months to be able to walk with a walking stick. The
boy couldn’t dance well again let alone play football. Nonso had in the past,
say things like that to many people, both students and teachers and it
always did come to pass. On that fateful day, I held him strong and inquired
why he calls me region and he said it’s because I am many. I was confused
so I asked how, he said sometimes if he looks at me he wouldn’t see just me
but a plenty of me, not me per se but plenty people around me and they are
we with me. I was like, ‘HOW’, but he said I should leave him alone, he
accused that I knew what he was talking about, he said I was the one
leading them, with that he ran away. Couple of months later, while we were
in J.S.S 3 X, a class I created in an uncompleted building at the back of the
school, where students who got sick of class gather to drink, smoke, gamble
and waste away their precious time, chatting about girls and love. They
were all talking about their girlfriends and what they’ll get for them on the
valentine love day. One of the boys asked me why I wasn’t contributing or
don’t I have a girlfriend or love anybody, but I told him I don’t waste my
loving, that all girls are prostitutes. No girl has ever had just one guy till
marriage, there is always an ‘ex’ and a ‘next’, and all will have sexual
intercourse with her. And before you will have sexual intercourse with
your so called girlfriend, you will spend lots of money trying to please her.
Is that not the same thing with prostitutes, just that they save you time and
stress. So I don’t waste my time loving. Nonso got furious, went into his
special mood and told me to my face, “You think you’re leading those
people around you, you think wrong, you’re their slave, you’re tied hands
and feet, in fact, you’ll remain stagnant from now till a very long time, till
love sets you free. You claim you don’t love but it’s only love, genuine love

26
that can set you free. Nobody understood what he was blabbing so we just
laughed and ignored him.
LESSON 16: A wise man once told me to give ears even to the
blabbing of a mad man because sometimes it takes a mad
man to say the truth. Don’t be too quick to ignore what you
heard because even in that nonsense there is sense.

THE LONG VACATION

My J.S.S 3 long vacation was the beginning of my demise because that
was when I read the most all my life. Yes, I read but only read all the things
in the world that shouldn’t be read by a sane person. My uncle being deeply
involved in spiritism and black magic had lots of magical books in his
library, ranging from the 6th, 7th and 8th books of Moses, the secrets of
psalms, how to become a witch, the seven books of Tuesdays Lobsang
Ramper, the lost years of Jesus Christ, so many I couldn’t remember but I
read all. It was during one of these days I saw my dead uncle for the first
time, not really the first time, but it was the first time I was conscious and
remembered seeing him. He smiled and told me not to be afraid that he was
my guidian angel. I’m not the kind of person that gets scared, well, what
scares people doesn’t really scare me, not at this point of my life. I looked at
him, I chuckled, I told him if he was my guidian angel, then he’s very
wicked; how can I have a guidian angel and I’m suffering like this. He asked
if I was really suffering and I ironically answered, no I’m enjoying, I’m
flexing, I’m chilling. The question that followed next struck me like a bomb
in the heart, many people had asked me this same question but I’ve not
being able to answer right, many people cannot answer it right too, “WHAT
DO YOU WANT”? I wanted to laugh but the expression on his face showed
he was dead serious; he asked again but this time on a higher tone, I said
what do you want. This time, I saw myself dying for some seconds, this is
the simplest but the most important question in my life, yet the most
difficult question I’ve ever answered. I have for long being confused about
my life, confused about choice of career and course of study, confused
about my innermost desire. It’s obvious I don’t care about riches as most
people do, I want money yes, but just enough to fulfil my dreams and
become a blessing to others, I wanted so many things in my life just that
they are not actually what I exactly wanted. So I was just there moping not
knowing what to say till something spoke from my inside, something I

27
knew wasn’t actually me but maybe was buried in me, he spoke in a simple
straight sentence, I WANT POWER. I knew you’ll say that, I know your
innermost desires even the ones you try so hard to suppress, I knew you
ever before you were born, I watched you grow. I will tell you this just once
son, you’re not an ordinary boy, you were born of a spirit and of flesh, the
bible will call you Nephilim but I call you a demigod because that’s what
you are. Gods do not beg for power, they are power themselves, you
already have that which you yearn in you; all you need do is exercise it. You
are still a boy son, you’re just a little boy but with time you’ll uncover all
that is buried in you and you’ll find out you’re the last key. I was looking at
him like he was an alien speaking a language I couldn’t understand but I
was forced to ask, which key? Armageddon, you’ll determine end time, you
have a role to play in how the world is going to end; you’re to stitch back
the sundered veil. Don’t worry my boy, you’re barely 13, I’ll guide you
through the next 5years but on your 18th birthday, you’ll choose your fate,
you’ll become, but I beg you think it through, think far and beyond before
you decide because your destiny may make or destroy you. From now,
every May will be your most confused and unstable month and every June
will be your worst month. You have 70 demons and 2 angels guiding you,
they represent the 72 spirits of life you possess, they will make you and
they will destroy you, they are your destiny. You are the bridge between
life and death, good and evil, light and darkness, truth and lies, up and
beneath, heaven and hell. You have the heart of an angel, the mind of the
devil and the strength of a god. You are the left side of the principal four.
2000years ago, it wasn’t just a son was born; they were 2; one came to
fulfil, the other to observe but to come back again. Watch the passion of
Christ very well, while J.C was doing his thing, there’s someone dressed in
black watching from a distance, people think it’s the devil, no, it’s the
observer. Many people think J.C came to die for the sins of the world, no
way, as time goes on, you’ll still uncover the truth about what happened
2015years ago. Till the time is right, till you fulfil your own destiny, you’ll
help me finish what I already started here before I was burnt. I was
speechless, I wasn’t really confused because I already concluded that the
man standing before me was a mad man, but the thing was, nobody was
standing before me. I asked him anyway, who burnt you and what couldn’t
you finish, if I’m to help you, at least I have the right to know. One step at a
time son, you’ll still grow to know, but till then I’ll be right there, no, right
here, just beneath your soul, I’ll guide you from here. Sleep on son, but now,

28
for the first time you’ll remember son, yes, you will. Now sleep son, now
sleep… AVTAR KAAR TUMA.
I woke up wondering if it was a dream, my imagination or reality. I
would’ve just gone about my normal business believing it was a dream if I
didn’t see it; while we were talking he held a book, now I’m awake I saw
same book lying on the floor. The book was titled ‘Jesus the man and his
work’, I was shocked and confused, I having a very searchy mind picked up
the book and began to read. I wondered why he gave me the book at first,
but when I finished reading, I realised why. I began to ponder everything he
told me, I became very emotionally and psychologically unstable, a part of
me was excited the other part was scared, but the whole of me was really
very confused. I was in great need to talk to someone but there was nobody
I could talk to, I became much burdened at heart, I didn’t know what to do
so I became so lonely and alone. When I couldn’t bear it anymore, I told the
only person in the world I could talk to at that time and that’s my mum, but
she made no sense out of it, I didn’t expect her to anyway, but she did the
only thing I knew she’ll do, she told my dad, who also didn’t say anything.
When I kept insisting I still see and talk to my dead uncle, my dad called me
one day and scolded me very coldly, he warned me to stop pulling silly
stunts that scared my younger ones. One day, he caught me in the library
talking to what seemed like myself, he became scared, not because I was
talking with his dead brother, but because he believed I was running mad,
which to him was as a result of cannabis, something he hadn’t even seen me
smoke before. The only thing he did was take me to our parish priest who
locked me up in the chapel.
LESSON 17: I said earlier that we should give ears to the blabs
of a mad man or a drunk because sometimes it takes just them
to say the truth. Don’t ever overlook the complaints, shouts or
the cries of your children even if they have cried wolf before.
Normal kids normally don’t lie; sometimes they may
exaggerate or lie white to save themselves or a loved one. But
they will not just fabricate a story that is entirely a lie. To be
deep, nothing is entirely a lie or entirely the truth. Everything
thing you think you know in life is a mixture of both truth and
lie that’s why life is so sweet. Truth in its entirety is very hard
and bitter, lie in its entirety is strong and hurtful, so the sweet
stories we hear and enjoy is a well-blended mixture of truth
and lies in appropriate proportion. Until you dig through,

29
 you’ll never discover where the truth and lies lay. Listen to
your kids even to their worst of lies; it is only when you listen
you can discern the truth in their lie.
I was locked up in the chapel for four days, morning till morning
without going anywhere or seeing anybody save for the priest who came to
pray every morning. Alone in the room, I thought about my life, about my
family, about my dad. I remembered when we lived large, when we had so
much to eat and so much to drink; I remembered the fleet of cars and the
many visitors who trooped into our compound. Now we couldn’t even feed
fine not to talk of cruise rides, nobody comes to our house anymore save
for those who came to mock or sympathise. My dad has aged rapidly due to
hardship; the old boy has changed emotionally, socially, psychologically,
physically and even spiritually; so has my mum. I felt for him, I really felt
his pain, it is better you don’t have from the onset than have and stop
having later. It’s worse when you have all it takes to have yet you don’t
have, it really feels like plague. So every night, in the mid of the night, the
old boy pray and cry, he cries to the only person he have in the world, to
the one person he believes he should cry to. He prays and fast everyday six
to six, yet things get worse. I pity my mum more, seeing her inherit the
responsibility of winning bread with the peanut she earns as a high school
teacher makes me feel for her real bad. I bleed more witnessing the
meekness and the calmness with which the innocent gentle boys and the
little baby girl adapt to the whirling storm that toss us around. My heart
ache and my soul bled, I’m the eldest child yet I’m helpless to my own
family. I was angry and pissed, felt like punching someone but nobody to
punch nobody to blame, everybody has his own cross to carry, that’s the
journey of life, so I lay low.
Lying here in the innermost chamber, the most sacred room of
1.3billion people, starring at that which they hold so dear and hang all their
hopes, faith and fates on, instead of punching, I began to laugh. I used to
wonder what on earth can be told to a suicide bomber that will make him
kill himself for any doctrine or teaching or anything at all; but see me being
told that a bread bought in the market, and a wine manufactured in a
factory, has become the body and blood of a man that died over 2000years
ago; I believe and is willing to die to protect it. Now I wondered the
difference between a suicide bomber and me, and I have come to accept the
fact that the greatest weapon on earth is indoctrination, with it, you can
build the worst and the most loyal army on earth. In order not be

30
unnecessarily a Thomas, plus having heard so many stories about the
miracles of the Blessed Sacrament, I decided to ask, “Are you really in
there”? Looking at the round piece of white unleavened bread, I felt a little
bit foolish but continued; I wouldn’t want to nurture the motion that
1.3billion people are foolish, so I believe it safe to assume that you’re in
there, why then are you being so wicked. Maybe as it is written, ‘I shall
bless whom I shall bless’, I guess we are not in the league of those that
should be called blessed, so my dad has just being wasting his precious
time knocking the wrong door. I stared at the tabernacle a couple of
minutes, hissed and lay down. After what seemed like ages but awhile,
there was a different atmosphere in the room, I felt it that I wasn’t alone so
I sat up to figure out what was going on, then I ceased to breathe for a
while. Literally speaking, I saw a man walk right out from the tabernacle; I
was too shocked to breathe, to shout or to even make any move. So I sat
there moping like a newly moulded sculpture about to get displayed,
marvelled to death point. One thing that marvelled me most was that, if this
man is who I really think him to be, which he was, then he’s far, very much
far from what pictures and movies paints him to be. He’s not fair in
complexion, he’s dark; he wasn’t dressed in all white, his robe was dark
green or chocolate or some sort, the truth is I was just too shocked to start
checking the colour of his clothe, I couldn’t even make out his face, but I
knew he was no way the drawings I know of him. He walked out very
gently but so confidently, and for the record, he was walking on air. He
came down, looked at me, smiled and asked; “what do you want”? This
same question till date I haven’t being able to answer, I always give
different answers at different times depending on my mood. I told him the
only thing I wanted at the time and it was nothing. He looked a little bit
surprised and to be sure he asked “nothing”? And I nodded in affirmation.
Why then have you being disturbing my peace, why then are you so pissed
at me. My shocked mode immediately trans generated into an angry mode,
my dad is dying silently, my mum aging rapidly, my sibs suffering bitterly,
yet you stand here before me to ask why I’m pissed. I’m sorry, please
forgive me, I’m happy, really very happy. Your dad is suffering because he
became my friend, that’s how I treat my friends; I let my friends suffer
because I too suffered. It’s only through suffering will someone get I real
crown, don’t they say no cross no crown. If you want to make heaven,
practise Luke 18:22. I love your dad more now, it is now that he has my
time, he now goes to church every day and prays always like it’s his last
day, that is the man I cherish, that is the man I made my friend. I looked at

31
him so bitterly, that’s why you have no friends; all you have is fake friends
who pretend to be your friend only during difficult times. As for me, I’ll
never be your friend; will never even pretend to be your friend even in
worst of all times. Then I vowed with anger on my own tears never to have
anything to do with God or the church, not in this life not even in the life to
come. This was my first denunciation of God and giving up my soul for the
devil. With that I gave up the ghost.
LESSON 18: It’s a wide and a very acceptable saying that
nobody gives what he doesn’t have; yet, we expect Jesus to
give us what he didn’t have and wouldn’t even want us to
have. It is when I understood the in-depth meaning of
Christianity did I realise that of a truth we all are anti-Christ.
Everybody alive, the pope, bishops, pastors and priests, lay
people, plus unbelievers, we all anti-Christ. We only proclaim
Christ with our mouth but our actions are nothing related to
Christ-like. One law of truth is that two truths cannot
contradict, if it does then one of them is a lie, maybe both of
them. If we proclaim Christ but don’t live Christ, our actions
contradict our words, so one of the two is a lie. Since actions
speak clearer than words, we’re judged by our actions not by
our words. Peter denied Jesus but his actions proclaimed
Christ, Judas proclaimed Christ but his actions denied Him;
Peter was saved but Judas was doomed. I’ve come to realise
that our greatest enemy isn’t the devil but ‘SELF’. What our
religious leaders care for is self not the church. They win
people not souls, they win people they lose souls. They don’t
care how many people that’ll make heaven what they care is
how many congregants they have. Christian has become a
business institution, you see them fly p.jays, cruise rides, wear
designers, feed continentally and preach prosperity. When
Jesus was on earth, there were rich people who lived in fine
houses, rode horses with guards and wore expensive robes;
but he didn’t make himself rich despite his influence. He chose
a life of chastity, charity, humility, celibacy, but most
importantly, poverty. He wouldn’t eat until his disciples are
fed, he wouldn’t go anywhere without them, he brought them
to his level so they can relate effectively. The blind Bathemeus
wouldn’t had been able to reach Jesus if he was riding on a
horse, the woman with the issue of blood wouldn’t had been
32
 able to touch him if he was surrounded with guards, he
wouldn’t had the zeal to feed 5000 if he was feeding
continentally, Mary wouldn’t had washed his feet if He was
wearing designers and the disciples wouldn’t be close to him if
he was living in a mansion. Jesus wouldn’t have performed his
miracles if he was living in affluence, he wouldn’t have
understood the needs of his people. Don’t they say if you want
to catch a mad man, behave like one, our religious leaders
don’t even have one-tenth of Jesus’ anointing yet they play
God. I have never seen a native doctor flying a jet or cruising
rides even though they make people billionaires, it’s because
they are true to the course, they are true to their gods. Our
leaders will deceive us with the saying that Jesus became poor
so we can be rich, but Jesus himself said if you want to be my
disciple, sell all you have, carry your cross and follow me. All
he disciples and their disciples did it, Paul and his disciples did
it, all the earlier Christian leaders did, yet, our present leaders
denounce it. Jesus said ask anything in his name and it will be
granted unto you, Jesus’ name is his nature, his nature is
simplicity, selflessness, chastity, charity, humility and poverty,
even Paul outlined the nature of Jesus in Galatians 5, when he
wrote on the fruit of the spirit. We cry that our prayers don’t
get answered, but the truth is we pray amiss. We ask Jesus for
spouse when he was single all his life, we ask for wealth when
he was poor, we ask for children when he had none, we ask
long life when he lived just 33years. Monks and nuns think
they are on the right track but they too are wrong. The
locking up things ended with Pentecost, if you’re saved, come
out and save others. If you lock yourself up to avoid
temptation, then you have no cross to carry. BOTTOM LINE:
Take it or leave it, we all are anti-Christ.
When I woke up, I didn’t know what happened to me and for how
long. I knew I died but didn’t know how long, couple of hours, maybe. The
only thing I remembered was falling through a tunnel or some sort, out into
a white light. Everything and everywhere was white, like a white desert just
that instead of sands, there were snow, warm dusty snow. I was wandering
alone in the middle of nowhere clueless of how I got there or where I was
heading to. I wandered for long till I found someone, he actually came to
me, I didn’t know who he was but I assumed it was my uncle. I assumed it
33
was my uncle partly because he was the only non-existing being I was in
contact with and partly because he was the only one who talked to me the
way he did. I didn’t bother to ask him who he was because I was more
concerned about where I was, so I asked “where am I”. You’re in the path
way, he called it a name I can’t remember, you haven’t crossed over yet.
Anybody that crosses over can never come back, it’s not yet your time to
cross, you have a big task ahead of you, a task you must accomplish. The
fate of Lucifer, all the demons and millions of lone spirits rests upon your
shoulders, now go back. He spoke in a language I couldn’t make out and
gave me hot slap. I woke up sneezing and my cheek was hurting, I didn’t
know which made it hurt, the slap from a gone land or the slap from Fr.
Gab. When I fully regained consciousness and my vision blurred no more, I
realised I had panicked my dad who stood there looking at me with a stone
face, scared to the hair and Fr. Gab who almost lost it in confused state and
Uchenna the girl that was the leader of the Mary league. They all stared at
me for minutes, not sure what to say save for my dad who spoke the only
words, let’s go home boy. I rose, my head was aching, my knees were
fidgeting but my heart had been hardened. I had chosen my path, I had
written my destiny and I had gotten a new ambition. My new ambition was
to be the head and in charge of all crimes that will take place in my country
before I proceeded to the world, that no evil or crime will take place
without my consent. It was the reputation I wanted to build, the legacy I
wanted to lead, to fulfil my destiny as a god, the god of the street. I worked
hard and toiled fervently to attain that status.
LESSON 19: Nobody alive has ever gone to heaven or hell and
came back. If you had read a book or listened to a tape that
says someone died and went to heaven or hell and came, and
you believed, all I can tell you is SORRY you’ve being seriously
misled.
When I got home that day, I didn’t tell anybody about my encounter
cum adventure into the land of the gone, nobody would’ve believed me
anyway. I kept my cool but started striving hard to unveil the secrets of
power and black magic, dark power, real power, not the nonsense written
in the 48 laws of power. I began reading, digging, practising and changing
friends. My companions became the street touts, those who have nothing to
lose. They weren’t actually my companions; they were more or less my
tools, the pawns on my chess board.

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 F.G.C WARRI
I enrolled into Federal Government College Warri, around October
2003 into S.S.1 class, science class to be precise. It was hell, hellier than St.
Charles, but this time it’s because I’ve grown stubborn more than I used to
in St. Charles. My hell started with an S.S.3 student called bush, nobody
knew his real name, nobody but a very few. It was customary that at the
resumption of every session, all the students from S.S.2 down to J.S.2 will
pay 100naira for the bush fee. Every student must pay save for the class
captains who were in charge of collecting the money. When I was told by
the class captain to pay bush fee for the first time, I didn’t understand; but
after being put through, I told him to go and collect pokka’s fee from bush
and bring it in the next 10minutes. He was so shocked because nobody had
ever had the audacity to challenge bush not even the teachers, let alone an
S.S.1 boy, a fresher for crying out loud. He left to tell bush, crying not for
him but for me.
Federal Government College Warri, was if not still is, a school with a
very high level of seniority. A J.S.1 student dare not talk back to a J.S.2
student let alone disobey or insult him. In a school like that, for an S.S.1
student to disobey not just an S.S.3 student, but the most dreaded student
in the school was a sin never conceived before by any student; it was
apocalypse. That was how I became a plague, a leper nobody dared mingle
with, I was excommunicated even by my own class. I was seen as a magnet
that attracts nothing but nemesis. Maybe it was true what someone once
told me that hard luck follows me like it’s my own shadow.
Being a fresher, you’ll be given just a week grace before being
welcomed into the customary frustration of the school system others
endured or tried very hard to swerve. I noticed I was the only S.S.1 student
who slept in the hostel between the hours of 4pm and 12am, and the only
one who will be seen in the hostel between 4am and 8am, every other
person will go into hiding. I didn’t know I was enjoying my week of grace,
till after a week and a day, I woke up as usual and was walking majestically
to fetch some water for my bath, when I heard a call. “Hey you ss1 student
stop there”; I stopped, thinking someone reasonable wanted to tell me
something very important. To my greatest surprise, empty buckets of water
started flying to the ground where I stood all around me, with the
instruction fill them up and bring them upstairs. I made an eye count, they

35
were about 26 buckets, I hissed, passed over them, took my bath at the tap
and went for class. This was my 2nd sin.
One Monday morning, we were in a physics class learning about
motion, the teacher said that the first law of motion states that a body will
remain in its state of rest or in uniform motion if already in motion unless
an external force is applied. He said this law is also known as inertia, that is,
the reluctance of a body to move when in state of rest or the reluctance of a
body to stop moving if already in motion. I didn’t agree with this law but I
kept quiet. He said the second law of motion states that the rate of change
of momentum of a body is directly proportional to the applied force and
takes place in the direction of the force. After all the mathematics, he
arrived at F α ma; therefore F = kma. If 1N force acts on 1kg of mass and
makes it accelerate at 1m/s; therefore 1 = k×1×1, then k = 1; therefore F =
ma. At this point I was already boiling with disagreement. He said that the
third law states that actions and reactions are equal and opposite; that the
product of the mass of a rocket and the speed is equal to the product of the
mass of the smoke coming out of the rocket and the speed with which they
come out. At this point, I stopped boiling but started laughing because it
was now very obvious to me that both Newton and my teacher and every
other person that believed this nonsense needs serious medical
examination. After he finished blabbing, he asked if there was any question,
nobody raised a hand. I knew why, most of the students were confused
because they didn’t understand, those who thought they did thought it was
too simple and nothing should be asked. Since there is no question, I’ll see
you guys on Friday then, he parked his books and started to leave. He was
almost at the door when I shouted, excuse me sir, he turned not with the
desire to answer any question but the anger to know who the idiot was.
Ehe what is the problem, were you sleeping since that you didn't indicate
when people with questions were asked to? Sir I don’t have a question sir,
just an opinion. What is it new boy? Sir I don’t think the Newton’s laws of
motion are correct. Which of them? All of them sir, the three of them sir, I
answered him with an eye full of curiosity. He came back looking like
someone who just saw a ghost and asked me ok professor, teach me. Before
I answered him, I asked the class, please does anybody have a biro, most
hands went up, I turned to the teacher and said, that means when you said
a body, it included human beings plus animals. Sir couple of seconds ago,
you were standing by the door, that was a state of rest, but you walked
from there to the table, I didn’t see any external force that pushed or pulled
you sir. That means sir; a body wouldn’t remain in a state of rest till an
36
external force is applied. Maybe the law is applicable only to non living
things and not everybody. Sir you also said that the first law is also known
as the law of inertia and that inertia is the reluctance of a body to move
when in a state of rest or reluctance of a body to stop moving if already in
motion. Sir from the kinetic theory of matter, the molecules of every matter
are in constant motion making the matter vibrate about a fixed point,
meaning that if not held together by a force, that a body tends to move. In
fact, if not held by the container, a liquid, gas, or fluid will always move.
Therefore sir, a body isn’t reluctant to move when in a state of rest.
Sir, from what you said, according to the 2 nd law, F=Kma. And if
1Newton of force, acts on 1kg of mass and makes it accelerate with 1m/s,
there k=1 and F=ma. But if 2Newton force acts on 2kg of mass and makes
moves with the acceleration of 2m/s, then k=0.5, therefore F≠ma. Sir, even
the law of gravity disputes this 2nd law of motion, because the same amount
of force makes a stone and a feather fall with the same acceleration despite
their masses. Sir, as for the third law, actions happen before reactions, and
action are not equal to reactions, the forces acting on a circle disputes your
third law too. So sir, I don’t think the three Newton’s laws of motion are
correct. I have just three things to tell you new boy, 1. You’re very stupid. 2.
For something to be called a law in science, it means it can ever be disputed
again. 3. Disputing Newton’s laws of motion can never put food on your
table; you should be more concerned with passing your exams, getting a
certificate and getting a job. This is what my teacher taught me, it is what
his teacher taught him and it is what I’m teaching you new boy. Do you
know what new boy; I don’t want to ever see you in my class again. This
was my 3rd sin.
Four days later, we were in another physics class with another
teacher, this time a woman, she was teaching waves. She said that a wave is
a disturbance that passes through a medium, transferring energy from one
point of the medium to another without causing any permanent
displacement to the medium itself. She then said that there are two types of
waves, mechanical waves; the type that requires a material medium for its
propagation and electromagnetic waves; the type that doesn’t require any
material medium for its propagation. At this point I got confused, I didn’t
get it anymore, I didn’t want to ask but I was no longer getting comfortable
with the teaching. So I forced myself to ask, excuse me ma; I don’t get it ma,
if electromagnetic wave does not require a material medium for its
propagation, is it a spiritual medium it requires. From your definition ma, a

37
wave must pass through a medium to transfer energy. So ma, it’s either
electromagnetic wave is not a wave, or that the definition you gave us does
not really fully define wave. Are you the new boy, I learnt it’s your hobby to
always cause confusion and bring distractions in class, but I’ll never give
you that chance in my own class, now get out. I was shocked I couldn’t
speak; I was getting out of the class wondering what I asked that was so
wrong. That was my 4th sin.
Two weeks later we were in a geography class, my first geography
class ever. They have all started before me; they have covered the solar
system, and the composition of the space. The history of the space and the
big bang theory, a theory that always make me chuckle till date. That fateful
day, the teacher was teaching us about the composition and the layers of
the earth. He said the earth has a centre called the earth core and has a
mantle; the earth mantle rotates with an intense velocity crushing all the
rocks which are known as the earth crust around it, thereby breaking them.
The result of the actions is earthquakes, volcanoes, mountain buildings and
ocean basins. He said that when rain falls, it fills up the ocean basins and
that is the origination of oceans. I got confused and wanted to be clarified. I
asked, sir, since from primary school, I was taught that rainfalls are as a
result of the evaporation of water molecules from oceans, seas, lakes, rivers
and ponds; which condense back and fall as rains. Sir the rains that fall and
filled up the ocean basins, please where did they come from. He answered
with annoyance, students please open your geography textbooks, is what I
just told you not the exact thing on your textbooks, why does this boy
always like causing confusion in class, leave my class now and I don’t want
to ever see your face again in my class. I left the class with mixed feelings,
that of dejection and that of curiosity because it was from then I got eager
to know the origin of water. That was my 5th sin anyway.
From that day, I hated science with passion and I hated classrooms. I
thought maybe art class would be a better option for a guy like me. I made
known to my dad my intent to switch, but he said over his dead body. He
said that arts classes are for shallow brained, that his son will never be an
art student because his sons are very intelligent and win competitions. I
didn’t know to do; I haven’t garnered the effrontery to disobey my dad. No
Nigerian kid can because from a very tender age, you must have witnessed
times without number the effect canes and cable wire. I no longer had the
enthusiasm to school any longer; I became an outlaw in my own class. Any
teacher that entered the class will first ask of me, send me out of the class if

38
I was around, before teaching. I became a fugitive so I roam round the
school during classes.
During one of my many roamings, I caught one of my classmate
stealing provisions from his school son locker. When I approached him, he
begged me and gave me some of the provision for my silence. Later on,
when the young started looking for his provisions and money, money I
wasn’t even aware of, my classmate who I was actually just an accomplice
to, snitched on me and roped me the thief. That was the first and the only
time in my life I was disgraced as a thief. I was so humiliated and
stigmatised that even my clique from home told our guardian that I was
responsible for all the many missing we encountered. It was actually my
worse day in Warri, a day I’ll never forget till I die. That was 6 th sin.
I was strolling around 11am one fateful day when I discovered a road
out of school. It was a broken fence at the back of the school. F.G.C Warri is
so big that not too many students has ever gotten to the end, only S.S.3
students who naturally are sick of school for obvious reasons knew the
way. The road was hidden naturally by a plantain plantation. I was strolling
hungrily looking for some ripe plantain, when I heard the cry of a girl
shouting mummy m o, mummy m o. I traced the cry, and it was an S.S.3 boy
that was raping a J.S.3 girl. The boy caught the girl outside school premises,
threatened to take her to the school authority, but later resorted to rape
her after she had begged for long minutes. He commanded her to touch her
toes while he raped her at the position. Normally, in my home town, if you
catch a guy raping a girl, or two people making out outside home, all you
need do is join the chorus. But I pitied this girl; I saw her in school uniform
and imagined if it were little sister, would I have joined. I took a big stick,
knocked the guy unconscious and ran away, so the guy and the girl
wouldn’t see my face. But the girl did, when she narrated her ordeal, she
said I was the one that helped her. The school authority expelled the boy; I
became other students’ hero especially the girl, but an enemy to S.S.3 guys.
That was my 7th sin.
The girl that was recognised as the best student in my class was
Mary; she has being taking the 1st position since their J.S.1. She was really
actually very brilliant and a little bit versatile when it comes to academics,
plus she was so much a bookworm. I never knew she was so into me till I
bumped into her on a Saturday afternoon when she was going to the class
to read. I was very surprised when I heard her call my name, I didn’t know
she knew me let alone knowing my name. She was a very pretty gentle girl
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and commands respect due to her quietness and meekness. She was
everybody’s crush except me because I had bigger fishes to fry than waste
my time crushing. She begged for some minutes of my time, which I gladly
gave. She bought me meat pie and soft drink, oh I forgot to mention she was
stingingly rich, and we went to a class. I called you dear because I’m really
very concerned about you, it’s been a while I saw you in class; I just want to
know if everything is all right. Well, I don’t actually know what you want
me say to you, but I thank you so much for your concern. If you’re really
always in class, you’ll agree with me you’ve lost count how many times I’ve
been sent out of class for no just cause. I haven’t actually, it is 5times, but
that shouldn’t make you stop classes. What else am I doing in a class that
both my teachers and fellow students don’t want me? You’re a very
intelligent boy, the most intelligent boy I’ve ever come across all my life,
please stop wasting your life, ignore the teachers, just come and learn. If
worse comes to worst don’t ask questions, or ask them privately, so they
won’t believe again you just want to fall their hands. Babe, the truth is I’m
actually sick of science; science is the worst thing that ever happened to
human race. How can you say such a thing, science is the god of civilisation,
the god of our modern world. Science made it possible for your dad to talk
to you anywhere you are in the world, science made it possible you can
visit any part of the world, science made it possible that instead of
harvesting in months, we harvest in hours, science gave us machines as
house servants, science has made life very easy, simple, liveable and
enjoyable.
Babe wait let me educate you on the adverse effects of science, if you
don’t know, nature left man imperfectly made or should I say half baked.
Everything man does in life, animals do it better than man. No man can fly
better than birds, no man can swim better than a fish, and no man can run
faster than a deer or cheetah. When it comes to sex, no man can have sex
better than a dog, is it talking, sleeping or even the violence in man, animals
do better than man. Man isn’t perfect in anything he does, but all the
animals have perfection at least in one of the too many things man do. So
man has being striving hard to perfect his imperfection that’s why man
introduced this monster called science. To fly better than a bird, man
invented air plane. To swim better than a fish, man invented submarines
and swimming kits. To have sex more than dogs, man invented drugs, to
outrun a deer, man invented cars. To sleep better than a beer, man
invented pills. To kill more than a lion, man invented guns. But what man
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didn’t know is that nature has a balance of life. A scale of 50:50, any
slightest change on the weight of one side of the scale, will affect the other
immediately. This balance of nature is found in time and seasons. There is
time for everything. We have rainy season and dry season and each knows
when to come and when to go. The trees know their season, that’s nature’s
perfection.
A strive towards the perfection of man’s imperfection is an ignorant
strive towards the imperfection of nature’s perfection, which may cause a
total imperfectivity, that means imperfecting both nature and man. If we
look around we’ll see the evidences of both man’s imperfection and
nature’s imperfection. Because man wants to travel underground like a
grass cutter, science digs tunnel inside the earth even way deep under seas
and oceans and something as large as hundreds of trains with bullets speed
runs inside these tunnels. That’s why earthquake happens and we blame
nature. Technology leaves nice lands to build houses and hotels and build
them on seas and oceans for no just cause other than to imperfect nature.
That’s why tsunami happens and we blame nature. Just because man wants
to fly better than a bird, man invented air planes, as big as one is, thousands
of them fly the sky, yet we complain our ozone is depleting. A million lives
had been wasted just because man wants to alter nature and fly like a bird.
Because man wants to perfect in everything the animals are perfect in, man
alters nature and now there are too many natural disasters, too many lives
lost to science and yet we love and welcome science wholeheartedly.
3% of carbon monoxide in the human system can lead to death. Yet
everyday all the automobiles and generators release billions of tons of this
gas into the atmosphere, into our ozone, life span is decreasing, ozone is
depleting, diseases incurable are arising yet man still believes in this
monster called science. We still depend on this monster for survival. 50
years ago in my hometown when lifespan was still 80, and life worth living,
if an age grade reaches 80 years, they go for thanksgiving for a life well
spent, we call it “ito ogbo”. But within a short period of time 50 years
perhaps, lifespan dropped from 80years to 45 years. Before, they say life
starts at 40, that a fool at forty is a fool forever. Now when does life start?
Why do we age and die earlier now? The answer is science. The most
annoying part of it is that the basic principles on which this ‘death ship’
sails are wrong. For example, motion is one of the basic things in science.

41
Because scientists believe that everything in life is in motion that even a
stone resting still on a floor is in motion. Because they believe that the sub
particles of that stone are in constant motion making the stone vibrate
about its fixed point. But the three Newton’s laws of motion on which this
science is embedded are not even correct, yet we use them to build all the
mechanism we use in science. The physics teacher said that a feather and a
stone will fall with the same acceleration, I dropped a feather and a stone,
and the stone reached the ground before the feather. I asked him why they
didn’t reach the ground at the same time since they fall with the same
acceleration, he said it is because I dropped them in an open space. He said
they will hit the ground at the same time if I had dropped them in a closed
space, which is in a vacuum. Sir, why then do we use a formula that works
only in a vacuum in solving problems and manufacturing mechanisms in
physics? Sir, are we living in a vacuum? He sent me out of the class, before
your own eyes. But that’s the thing about science, during the cause of an
invention, science encounters a problem it can’t solve, it neglects it and
moves on, in the end it backfires on the life of poor souls. Believe me dear,
science is doing more harm than good.
Another science laws that made me leave studying science as a
course are gas laws. Charles’s, Boyle’s and pressure laws were thought with
just one side of the brain. Charles law states that the volume of a given
mass of gas is directly proportional to its absolute temperature provided
the pressure remains constant. This means that when temperature
increases, volume increases and pressure remains constant. How can I
believe this when I know vividly well that increase in temperature
increases the kinetic energy of the particles of any matter no matter its
state? Be it liquid, solid or a gas. And as the kinetic energy increases, the
vibration of the particles of the matter increases resulting to an increase in
pressure. So how possible is it that pressure will remain constant as
temperature increases? It’s not possible. If the temperature of a gas
increases, the pressure increases but if the volume increases, the pressure
begins to decrease, but it will decrease to a level where it won’t decrease
again it will begin to increase even if the volume increases.
Boyle’s law states that the volume of a given mass of gas is inversely
proportional to its pressure provided the temperature is constant. This is
not true because as the volume of the containing vessel of a gas is reduced,

42
the number of molecules per unit volume is increased. Hence the number of
collisions in unit area is increased. Thus the pressure of the given mass of
gas increase but the collision also brings about internal heat of the gas so as
the pressure increases the internal temperature of the gas increases and
with time it comes out to the environment. So temperature can never
remain constant.
Even the pressure law which states that the pressure of a given mass
of gas is directly proportional to its absolute temperature provided its
volume remains constant doesn’t also consider the factor time Which
Charles’s law and Boyle’s law neglected. If the temperature of a given mass
of gas increases, the rate of collision increases with time if the temperature
continues to increase. Then the kinetic energy becomes so strong that the
collisions will now become unbearable if this happens, they tend to escape
at all cost if the containing vessel is elastic, it will be seen the volume will
expand on its own but if it’s not the vessel will break for infinite increase in
volume. So in those general gas laws of theirs, they should try add another
factor time (t) which should be considered when dealing with pressure,
temperature, and volume’s relativity of a gas and they should experiment
with large amount of gas.
X-ray as we are meant to believe is one of the very good, very blessed
and very useful works of science. It helps detect hidden fractures in the
body. But the truth is x-ray is one of the deadliest weapons of science. It is
deadly because it’s an unfinished experiment. It is unknown to science. Its
name ‘x’ –ray means unknown ray. ‘X’ if you recall is used in science or
mathematics for an unknown or incomprehensive value, x-ray was
discovered accidentally by Wilhelm Rontgen when he was experimenting
on the surface reaction of vacuum tubes when bombarded with gamma
rays – he kept it secret because he was scared of the observation. He knew
that if not properly observed, analyzed and understood, it can be a gift or a
trap, a blessing or a curse. But just after a few weeks of inexperienced
discovery, that which happens to other scientists began to work him.
Uncontrollable hunger for either fame or fortune or both depending on
personality, he introduced it to science. Science forgot that before Rontgen
brought x-ray to it, he has already tested it on his wife and after the
experiment; the woman shouted “I have seen my death”. I don’t know if
science took her to be foolish or mad. But one thing I know is that they

43
neglected her because they were busy estimating the billions of dollars
they will make out of this monster. How many hospitals in the world will
buy x-ray machines and how many ignorant people will come pay to see
their death? Before someone could say Jack Robinson, Rontgen had started
receiving awards from all angles. He became immortal because as long as
that killing machine x-ray lives, the name Rontgen will never die, he
became famous, he became a celebrity, he became a genius and most
importantly he became wealthy just because he constructed a new fast lane
for the motor death. Today millions of people every single day go on their
own to pay visits to that death Anna Bertha saw and shouted.
They are very ignorant of the fact that the discoverer of that
‘unknown ray died of Carcinoma’. In case you don’t know, Carcinoma is a
tumour tissue derived from a putative epithelial cell whose genome has
been altered or completely damaged to such an extent that the cell becomes
transformed and begins to exhibit abnormal malignant properties. Like the
mother cause x-ray, it’s unknown to science. The origin or the development
lineage of these cells is unknown. Yet science claimed that x-ray didn’t kill
Rontgen. ‘No it’s my father that killed him’. Whether science claims x-ray
didn’t kill Rontgen or not, the fact still remains that anytime the body or a
cell is exposed to any form of radiation, it has effects on the cell or the body
no matter how small the radioactive element is and no matter how little
time it penetrates the body or the cell. The only thing is that if the radiation
is strong and is exposed to the body for a long time, the effect of radiation
will be spontaneous and more harmful. The effect might be sudden death,
deformation or malfunction of the body tissues or organs or even systems.
Deformations like blindness, deafness and other diseases like cancer. But if
the radioactive element is small/light and radiation short for a very short
time, it will still have harmful effect. It alters the genomes of the body cells
or even damages them completely as explained in carcinoma. The genes of
the patient will be altered gradually it might be noticed that the offspring
and more after will exhibit some form of abnormalities which can’t be
explained. May be your generations will start getting blind or crippled or
something.
So many pioneers in science die in their line of work to show that
what they were doing is very detrimental to our world. But instead of their
successors to take note and get rid of the project, they tend to dedicate

44
more time to the work. Marie Curie died of leukaemia due to exposure to
radiation; she is a co-inventor of Radium. But science will try to make you
understand that she died of constant assimilation of excess radiation to
justify their ongoing works on/with radiation. Science tells us that it helps
us understand our world better but the truth is it helps us destroy our
world faster.
Tell me what science was thinking when he invented guns, do you
know how many billions lives that has being lost to gun powder and
explosives? Hitler was able to kill six million Jews because of science. Every
day we watch television and we feel array. We don’t know what the
television rays do to our eyes, what the computers we operate everyday do
to us, and the laptops on our laps etc. What was science thinking when he
gave us destructive devices, what are the manufacturers of explosives
thinking when they manufacture them, what has it added to our world, is it
for better or for worse. A country, a white country because Africa can never
be that mad, will wake up one morning and start wasting their resources
and energy, just to build a nuclear weapon that can destroy the whole
world within hours. The world that includes them; If they are not stupid,
tell me are they not mad? It was this madness that they brought to Africa,
this stupidity, this irrationality; they took away the joy of the Africanism.
Before, if Africa wants to fight, they fight hand to hand, bone to bone, they
test strength and manhood as my mentor described in “things fall apart”. In
the end a few people die and the war is ended, they shook hands reconcile
and it’s all over. But look at what happened in Nigeria between 1967 to
1970, that was not fight at all that was not war, that was pure manipulation
of the motor death called ‘science’ read ‘half of a yellow sun’, to understand
better. Now after 46 years we have not even fully from that ‘Oh God’ that
happened. Science knows that smokers are liable to die young, yet it
manufactures smokes. Why because science doesn’t care about our lives, it
cares only about the money and the name it makes. I was still talking when
I noticed some S.S.3 boys coming towards the class we were in, before she
could blink her eyes, I scaled the window and ran into the bush.
I continued living like a fugitive, always on the run, it was like
troubles always follow me like it’s my own shadow. I was walking
majestically one day on my own, trying to bother nobody, and trying to
manage what was left of my shattered life. I was eating my moi moi and

45
bread when I heard a voice shout, hey you new boy come here before the
count of five. I was praying within me that the force that guided me should
let this trouble pass by me, while I contemplated on whether to answer him
or not. To avoid more trouble, I for the first time since I entered the school
answered to such a stupid call. Are you not the idiot everybody is looking
for, you’re here eating moi moi and bread like you were sent here to eat; in
fact, disarm yourself. I was looking at him wondering who is crazy, he who
was blabbing rubbish or I who answered to a nonsense call. I was still
looking at him when he made attempt to dip his hands into my pockets; I
punched him on the nose and kicked him on the balls, he groaned shouted
and fell on the ground while I ran away. That was my 8 th sin.
I fell in love with Mary, since all my high school days, she was the
only student who I believed really to ever care for me. I thought about her
day and night and wished I could get the opportunity to someday tell her
how I felt. So I looked for an opportunity to slip into her in class, I slipped a
piece of paper into her book, the piece was apologising for the sudden end
of our last meeting and was begging for us to meet again same place same
time. I wasn’t sure if she was going to come, nobody had ever had the
effrontery to ask her out, but since she said she was concerned about me, I
gave it a shot. I totally forgot about my meeting with Mary, I was strolling,
roaming about the bushes of the school an hour after when we were
supposed to meet when I remembered. I ran like a mad dog to the class we
were supposed to meet, I met her composed reading her chemistry
textbook. I was ashamed and troubled, didn’t know what to do or say next,
so I stood there by the door mopping at her. Come in, she said it without
any form of emotion, I wasn’t sure if I should go in or not, but for what it
worth, I did. I’m sorry I kept you waiting, the truth is I didn’t actually forget
and I wasn’t doing anything, just that I wasn’t sure if you were going to
show up. Now I did, what’s up, why did you request to see me. I like you
and I think about you all the time, the thought of you is the only thing that
makes me smile since I entered this school, I just think it proper to let you
know, I believe you deserve to know. Now I know; what does it change. I
was actually thinking that maybe there’s a slight possibility you may feel
same way, and maybe you could be my girlfriend. She laughed, with the
smile she looked so beautiful, so much an angel, I felt the urge to dive her
lips and devour it with kisses.

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 I’m already your friend; as a matter of fact I approached you first.
What is the difference between me being your friend and being your
girlfriend? If I tell you yes I’m your girlfriend, it means I have given you
authority over me, to own me like a commodity bought in the market. Plus
you’ll want to be having sexual intercourse with me, make me your sex toy.
I’m a gentleman dear, I don’t own people, I believe the world is a free one,
everybody has right to live and be happy, so I won’t own you dear. But as
for the sex, I was actually banking on that, I’ll never lie to you, I’m hoping
on making love to you someday not have sex with you. You couldn’t own
me even if you try in a hundred years, as for the sex or love making or
whatever you’ll want to call it, it won’t happen even in your wildest dream.
I’ll be your girlfriend, yes, but my relationship with you will be sex free, feel
me? Thank you so much, but at least can I kiss you, not really now but as we
date can I? You can kiss me as many times as you want, but you’ll only be
turning yourself on, why will you want to be tormenting yourself. Maybe if
the love grew in you, you may want to save me from the torment someday.
By the way, why wouldn’t you want to make love me, don’t you love me
enough to? I don’t actually expect such silly question from you but I’ll
answer; fornication is not love and fornication is a sin, don’t you read your
bible. I’ve actually read the bible cover to cover 5times, fornication is not a
sin dear, and I can prove it to you using the bible. I wouldn’t believe you but
lecture me anyway, I entertain new knowledge.
They tell us fornication is a sin but fornication is not a sin.
Fornication came from a Greek word (Porneia) which means having any
sexual act after the betrothal contract. That is if you are already engaged, it
is not appropriate to have or engage in any form of sexual act. This is
understandable because then in the ancient centuries, if a girl is born, she is
betrothed to a man immediately and the man or boy is looking forward
seriously to taking her up as a wife. And then, they took virginity very
seriously, a man will only be respected in the society if his wife was
married a virgin and a girl is respected if she was married a virgin. So any
sexual act after the betrothal contract will be very detrimental to both the
girl and the boy. It is the same thing like in our modern world, if a girl is
engaged to a guy and the guy had already paid the bride price, it is
unethical for the girl to engage in any form of sexual act. But if the girl is not
engaged, having sex is no big deal. Well it’s a little big deal if she’s a virgin,

47
we can see that in (Deuteronomy 22:28 up and down) and in (Exodus
22:16). If a virgin engage in a sexual intercourse with a man, the man will
have to pay her bride price and take her for a wife but if the man doesn’t
want to take her for a wife, the girl’s father will have to name a price for his
daughter’s virginity. After that the girl can never marry again because all
her husband will divorce her immediately after the first night because of
the lost of her virginity. So she becomes a common prostitute. At this
juncture, having sex with her is no sin; it’s just immoral because one
shouldn’t pay for sex. But an intercourse with a girl who’s not a virgin,
who’s not engaged and who doesn’t bill you for that, is no sin at all in fact
you are just helping bring the body and soul at peace and ease. But in our
modern world today, that betrothal bullshit doesn’t hold again and
virginity now is more of a burden than virtue, fornication no longer means
what it meant. The contextual meaning has now changed. Fornication now
means that very sweet, lovely, healthy moment a young boy and a beautiful
girl spent together easing stress and developing mutuality. Fornication is
now a harmless sexual intercourse between a boy and an un-engaged girl
whose lost of virginity benefits more than it’s retain. Now they still term it
to be sinful. The only sexual act that is a sin is sexual immorality; sexual
immoralities are sex abuses. When you abuse sex it’s either through rape,
masturbation, homosexuality, bestiality or even adultery. Adultery is
immoral because it’s a breach of contract, a defilement of vow, a betrayal of
trust and fidelity; it’s an emotional kill, that’s why it’s a sin. Rape and
adultery are sins against our fellow human beings, but masturbation,
homosexual and lesbianism are sins against oneself. “Shey”, the bible says,
‘love your neighbour as yourself’ then you’ll then love ‘God’ as your
neighbour.
So love begins with one’s self as charity begins at home. If you love
yourself, you won’t give yourself a stone instead of bread, or scorpion
instead of meat. It takes a mature man’s testrones 21 days to reproduce lost
sperm cells. When these cells are produced, they need to get off the body
system to make way for new ones and our body systems have a desirable
and preferable way to eject those cells which is through sexual intercourse
with a willing mature young lady who is having the same body signal. When
I was in S.S. 1, my classmate Nonso Obiozor told a story of how his elder
brother was sick and went to the hospital but the doctor told him to go and

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have sex with a girl and he’ll be fine. I don’t know how true the story is, I
wouldn’t want to say that accumulation of spermatozoa in the body system
is harmful because I’m not sure. I asked a couple of medical practitioners,
some said it is, some say it’s not and I can’t lay my hand on any write-up
that say it is. But one thing I know for sure is that no matured man above
20 years can stay for one complete calendar year without ejaculation. You
might either do it through masturbation, sexual intercourse or wet dream.
But the question is why will you masturbate, or go meet animals or your
fellow sex or wait to dream sex before you ejaculate? When God saw this
impending need and without our asking for help gave us beautiful women
and gave us the license to go and multiply and throughout the book of
Genesis, it was never recorded that Adam must marry Eve before they start
having sex. And no mature woman can stay one full calendar year without
inserting into her vagina. It depends on what she chose to insert, her
fingers, bottle, candle, vibrators or the real thing. Nature has a balance of
life, let’s be realistic and stop altering it. Well, they know the truth but they
just want to frustrate us. Because we are youths they just don’t want us
healthy and happy.
She was looking at me like she had seen a ghost; I know she was
actually wondering which part of the world this young man came from. Has
anybody ever told you you’re a devil’s advocate, your problem is you’re too
intelligent and your mind is very searchy, your brain is way bigger than
your age, instead of being a blessing, it’s now a problem for you. I’ll see you
tomorrow dear; my head is full for today. Come here same time, don’t ever
keep me waiting again, I won’t forgive you so easily next time. She packed
her books and started to leave, I watched her wondering if I just ended a
relationship that just started. When she reached the door, she turned and
signalled me to come, I did like a kid about to get flogged, but to my
greatest surprised, she drew my lips to hers and kissed me deeply and
passionately. My heart stopped beating and my whole world stood still, I
was so lifeless I didn’t know when she left. We dated just for couple of
weeks, I adored and worshipped her, but the pressure on me was so much,
the whole senior students were looking for me to skin. I was sleeping in
cemetery and on top trees, when I couldn’t take it anymore, I left the school
entirely, I left Mary and all my property behind, I begged alms and I
boarded a bus to home.

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 LESSON 20: It was in Warri I discovered that all Nigerian
students study by faith. They believe all they are told without
asking questions, without even understanding what they are
being taught. I feel most for the science students, the only
practical done in secondary school labs is titration and simple
pendulum. There is no S.S.3 student in public school who has
even written the S.S.C.E that can boast of seeing 7 of the first
20elements. They only recite science courses like they were
poetry. That’s why we still invite engineers and doctors from
abroad.
LESSON 21: Except you have nothing to lose, don’t ever play
hero and try to change what is to what you think should be.
Those who tried died trying; those who succeeded were just
victims of circumstances and had nothing to lose.

LIFE AFTER HIGH SCHOOL

My classroom days literally ended in Warri, but in the actual sense of
it, it was in St. Charles I collected anything result in a school. When I left
F.G.C. Warri, I was supposed to enrol in Christ the King College Onitsha
(C.K.C), to my parents I enrolled, but because I was meant to repeat S.S.1, I
didn’t enter a class not even for a day. I’ll wake up every morning, dress for
school but will never enter the school. I’ll be any other place, doing any
other thing but school. As at the time, I was already very strongly far drawn
into the street. The street had made me an animal; I became a beast that
has no hope, no direction, no responsibility, no home, no emotions and no
conscience. No, I had emotions because I was still rational, I still had
passion as I still loved. What I lacked was forgiveness, compassion,
sympathy, remorse, regrets and fear. In fact, in totality, I lacked realisation
of self. Gambling was all in one my profession, carrier, work and hobby.
Weed and drink were my only source of joy, no, happiness because I had no
joy, lost it since I was 12. I became a businessman who traded in drugs and
stolen properties, those who knew me wept for me, they said I was
bewitched, well, to some extent it was true, but I wasn’t bewitched by
anybody, I was bewitched by life itself. When I opened my bible, dictionary

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or any other good book, the only thing I saw was just one word which was
‘SURVIVE’, so I did anything just to survive.
School became tiring and boring since I was in J.S.3, because all my
teachers couldn’t teach me, I only managed to register outside W.A.E.C to
get my S.S.C.E. The first JAMB I wrote, the girl I helped because she was sick
scored 257 but my own result was not available. Not just the first, but the
first four, like someone somewhere didn’t want me further my education. I
tried everything I could, I understood my subjects even better than my
teachers, yet I couldn’t pass exams. I gave up on education, and I being a
prince, being already used to soft life, couldn’t do no menial jobs, couldn’t
learn any skill below standard, or serve anybody; so I became a street king.
The street feared, revered and respected me. I was bestowed upon by the
street the glory of a god, I made their wrong seem right and restored for
them that esteem the society had stolen for them. I hated oppression and
injustice and fought against anybody who oppressed anyone, I sold drugs
on the street to feed, did many things to survive, but the thought of
conquering someday kept me moving, kept me from being caught. One day,
one of my friends, captain, approached me with the idea of joining the
movement, he told me they are freedom fighters, they fight against any
form of injustice and oppression. He said their motto is equal right and
justice and they are out to help the poor and the oppressed. It sounded like
my thing so I accepted to join. On the 16th of June, 2012, I was initiated into
the movement, I was taught the history, tradition, culture and laws. A few
months after I was initiated, I learnt the truth about cultism. Like someone
told me in the past, most times, worst of crimes are committed with best of
intentions; like the church, government and every other good institution,
cultism was founded to really protect the rights of the university students
and the handicapped in the street. But it was infiltrated, by hoodlums and
street bums who derive their own ecstasy by inflicting pains on others.
There are people who by nature are designed to be ruthless, irrational and
thoughtless. They perambulate around looking for a lesser hand to bully,
they derive joy by bringing sorrow to people's lives. They shield under the
protect of cultism to perpetrate evil and make for the confraternity the bad
name it bears. Some days after my initiation, we were walking on the street,
I, captain and four other peeps in the hood, we met one young man on the
road when captain gave us the order to beat the boy. Without asking

51
questions or a second thought, they pounced on the young man and beat
him half dead, I couldn't do that so I didn't join. When we got to where we
were going, captain ordered me to lie down while the others flogged me
like I was a village thief. before the initiation, captain couldn't look me in
the eye and talk to me, now see what being a cultist reduced me to. It was
then I realised how much of a mistake I made joining the movement, I was
really better off on my own as the street god, but movement stripped me of
my immortality and bestowed on me a crown of sins. I don't know what
you've seen in movies or read in books, but none is true about initiation or
the nature of cultism. Every cultist is under blood oath never to under any
circumstance reveal what he witnessed except he wants death knocking on
his door, I wonder then who's telling those tales. It was until I became one
did I know why many young people want to become cultists, though most
of them regret later, depending on the horse you backed.
LESSON 22: I know cultism has caused lots of damages to the
universities, I know it has damaged lives, broken hearts and
has killed dreams, but the best way to handle cultism in
Nigeria now is not trying to stop it but legalize it. Cultism has
grown a very deep root that it's not just in the universities but
in secondary schools too, it has taken strong hold of our youths
and has gripped the dreams of our young ones, the worst is,
even our fathers are in the same lane. But if you arrest or kill
one cultist today, 20 will be initiated tomorrow. The irony of it
all is that the nabbings and the killings do not frighten them
but makes them more deadly, more dangerous and more
cautious. You can only tame, caution or direct someone you
know and is close to not a stranger or worse still, an enemy;
the government doesn't know the cultists, but the cultists
know the government. If you don't really know who they are,
how do you expect to control or catch them all. The best way
to handle cultism is to legalize it, give them a sense of
belonging, that's the only way you can put them under control.
When you legalize cultism, initiations will no longer be
done in the bush but in the open, their traditions, oath and
laws will be made open and will be fully understood, every
cultist will be meant to have an identity card, that's when any

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 cult activity can be traced. They'll form association under
which all registered cults will adhere to, the association will be
like the judiciary and the body controlling them. This way,
cultism will have no choice but be forced to become social
clubs. This is the only way, without this measure, cultism can
never be controlled at least in Nigeria.

THE DARK PATH

Having lost my sense immortality as a god because I now have people
I answer to, and I being born to be the destroyer of my own life, I started
looking for a way to gain for myself godlike powers, powers to control the
universe and every evil on it. My only goal was to be in charge of all the
crimes, corruption and evil that happens in Nigeria and the only way to
achieve that was to have the kind of power nobody else would. So I started
reading books, I started practising all the simple little magic and spells I
could read up in my uncle's library. Before, during my primary school days,
if I lost any of my important things and I seriously want to find it, I'll just
recite this simple prayer and I'll find it. When I lost my school fees in
primary 6, I recited it and found it.
"Jesus lost Jesus found, help me to find my money.
Jesus lost Jesus found, help me to find my money.
Jesus lost Jesus found, help me to find my money"
And I ended it with the lord's prayer and a couple of hail Marys. but
since I started practising black, instead of prayers, I use simple spells and
magic to find my lost properties. I lost my phone then, Motorola razor,
instead of prayers, I casted this small spell and found the phone. I bought a
white candle, placed it on a clean surface, brought the receipt of the phone
and casted this spell....
I call upon the forces that you hold bound,
that this phone of mine be it stolen or lost be found,
what is lost I bound be found,

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 take my luck and turn it round....... I cast it while I burn the receipt, I
recited it 5times and made sure the receipt burned to ash before I blew the
flame and the ashes away. I saw my phone on my bed when I woke up.
There are other simple spells I learnt that can be used to recover lost items
too....
1. I now invoke the law of three.... what once was lost return to me.
2. Bound and binding... binding bound....see the sight... hear the
sound... what was lost... now is found... bound and binding...
binding bound.
3. Keeper of what disappears... hear me now - open your ears... find
me now what I now seek... by moon, sun, earth, air, fire and sea.
I kept casting spells and learning simple magic, I was growing in
spirit and I was enjoying it, till one day I found the book clavicula
solomonis. I read about all the 72 keys of Solomon, the lesser and greater
spirits of Solomon, how to conjure, summon, invoke and evoke demons. I
was consumed with the desire to rule and govern men, the yearn of
acquisition of powers that nobody ever had and the unquenchable hunger
to play god on earth. Little by little, step by step, I see myself growing into
the dark, I see me walk into the valleys of the underworld. When my soul
was fully consumed, when I knew I had already lost every sense of sanity
and humanity, with a very adventurous enthusiasm, I invoked my first
demon... lady Astaroth, the goddess of love. I shut every door and closed all
the windows that not even a beam of light can penetrate the room, I lit a
white candle and started staring at it. I stared at it for a long time, playing
on my mind all the evil and abuse that was meted on me, I was engulfed
with an enamous amount of bitterness, anger and rage. I was so engulfed
that before I even started the rite , I already felt her presence. Then I
started.....
"Hail, Astaroth! Great Goddess of Love and War! Lady Lucifer of the
Twilight; O mighty Lioness of Love's burning desire. I humbly invoke you, O
Queen of Heaven and Earth; I invite you to come forth from the sky, to
come forth from the ends of the earth and come forth from the depths of
the underworld. Hear my prayer oh blessed whore of Babylon, and greet
me as your servant and friend! I wish only to get to know you, and to

54
rejoice in the fiery light of your majestic spirit. Hail Astaroth! Hail Astaroth!
Hail Astaroth!.....
The whole room started turning round like it was a hurricane, the
room was filled with this strange scent that was neither pleasant nor foul,
just significant, I felt myself like being taking away out into the atmosphere.
Under normal circumstance, I would have being scared to death, but my
mood then was something really out of even extra ordinary. I felt like I was
in a world out of our world, like in a world between worlds, then she came
riding on a horse, she was so beautiful she looked nothing like a demon; she
was so pretty and cool that I said to myself, if demons were this cool, I
wouldn't mind being one. She looked at me with so much tender and
affection, she seemed so caring and loving. Maybe it was her nature; maybe
it was staged to buy my heart, whichever way it worked. She looked at me
and said, my child, I feel your pain, I see your sorrow, I feel your loneliness,
I see you're lost. You’re lost in your world, the world you're supposed to
rule, nobody understands you, so nobody loves you, because they dread
you, they try to strip you, so they can rip you. You're bitter and angry,
you're frustrated and disturbed, but it's a pity I cannot help you. You have
in you the shroud of Belial; you cannot be guided, led, controlled or
subjected. You have no master; you're your own boss and stick only to your
own laws. All you need do is discover yourself and become, maybe you
should invoke Belial to help you discover yourself, but till then dear,
disturb my peace no more, with that I lost consciousness. I didn't know
how long I passed out, but I know is I remembered everything that
happened. I started from that day to invoke Belial but couldn't, I tried all I
could, tried all the invocations I could dig up but couldn't invoke him, so I
gave up. One fateful day, while in my sleep, I started having these strange
feelings that I've got an intruder in my room. The feeling was so strong that
it came with a scent, I tried to wake up but couldn't. Then like in a trance or
a dream though I knew in its fullness it was reality, it came like a wild beast
at first to scare me, but when it didn't work well, it came like an angel, two
angels to be precise but was same person, it was like duplicate. He asked
me why I had being disturbing his rest, I couldn't answer; I was actually too
shocked to. He told me he knew my problem, he said I am too scared, too
religious to embrace myself. He said I've being so much indoctrinated by
my religion that I'm now too blind to see life as it is. He said my problem is

55
that I'm a god but have being brain washed to be an angel. Humans don't
know the power they carry, angels and demons have no powers of their
own, they have no free will, they're subjected to both humans and
whichever deity they are loyal to, they are just but mere messengers.
Humans have free will, they're created in God's likeness, they're gods on
their own and they have the power and authority to say whatever it is they
want and it'll be. Only but just a very few humans know this truth and they
use it to control the world. You shouldn't be the one working so hard to
summon even the smallest angels or demons; they should be the ones
working so hard to get to you. Now son let me show you the truth you don't
know. Read this and be liberated.

The Demonic Bible

Preface

If power corrupts and absolute power corrupts absolutely, then the omnipotent creator
of heaven and earth must be the most evil son-of-a-bitch who ever lived. Non-Christians,
we are told, are damned to hell because they have not accepted Christ as their personal
saviour. Non-Catholics, we are told, are damned to hell because they have rejected God's
Holy Church. And Catholics, we are told, are damned to hell for bowing down to and
worshipping graven images. The irony of organized religious thought is the damnation
of all, regardless of belief or quality of life.

It has often been said by scholars that devils are "fallen" gods, or deities men no longer
worship. But then, are not gods simply devils men choose to worship? Could it be that
Yahweh and Allah are simply more "politically correct" devils than Astaroth and
Beelzebub? The followers of every religion have been condemned by others as "devil-
worshippers" at some time or another. In the "tolerant" social climate of today, the
Christian still condemns the Jew, the Jew still condemns the Muslim, and the Muslim still
condemns the Christian. Each is willing to kill and commit heinous crimes in the name
of his "god". Would it not be more honest for man to admit that he is a worshipper of
devils and a believer in fairy tales? It is with these thoughts in mind that the Demonic
Bible is written. Stop now at the horror of these words and cower in fear for your
immortal soul, or read on and discover true and undefiled wisdom... for enlightenment
speaks to the brave.

The Magical Art

In the course of a man's life, there are moments of clarity and there are moments of
darkness. At his mental peak, he experiences great clarity of thought and profound

56
realization. And at his low, he experiences depression, anger, or melancholy. Drugs,
chemicals, foods and lifestyle changes may affect his thought processes in various ways.
Disregarding for the moment the objective existence of spirits or demons, ritual magic is
a way to control the mind. Without the use of drugs or chemicals, the magician controls
directly his level of conscious awareness. He experiences "being awake" mentally, a
state which the mundane only experience after large amounts of coffee or other
stimulants. The spirits or demons he calls upon exist within his subjective mind and
respond to his invocations. As a magician progresses in the Magical Art, he gains control
over his emotions and experiences more "peaks" than "lows".

The objective existence of spirits or demons does not need to be proven in order to
show the effectiveness of magic. Parapsychologists have shown, through years of
research and investigation which only the most cynical will deny, the definite existence
of telepathy or mental communication. The human brain operates, like a radio, receiving
the brain waves "broadcast" by others of similar frequency. For this reason, telepathy is
most common among close friends or family members. A magician may be seen, then, as
someone who has converted the "receiver" of his brain into a "transmitter." At first he
may only be able to influence those who are on a similar "frequency" to his own or will
have to learn how to change "frequency" in order to influence those on different
"frequencies". But the more powerful his "transmitter" becomes, the more people he
will be able to influence directly.

The quickest and most direct route to the brain is through the optic nerve. Mental
transmissions from the brain are sent through the optic nerve to the eyes and out
through the eye cavities. This is the origin of the "evil eye" and "fascination", as well as
the expression "the eyes are the window to the soul." In the Middle Ages, witch-hunters
used to remove the eyes of "witches" so that they would not be able to look upon them
and curse them. Once a magician has acquired control of his own mental states (through
ritual magic), and has converted the "receiver" in his brain into a "transmitter", he is
able to "influence" rather than "be influenced". He may even feel contempt for those
who are led around upon rash emotional whims without the slightest balance or
direction.

Many people carry around with them subconscious masochistic tendencies, causing
them to do things which will bring pain or misery upon themselves. In magical
terminology, this is called a "curse". In its most severe form, the human mind becomes
unbalanced, resulting in mental illness, paranoia, psychosis, or schizophrenia. Many
people have "cursed" themselves or have been "cursed" by others, either intentionally
or unintentionally. Wishing to place a curse on his enemy, an accomplished magician
(someone who has mastered the mental states of his consciousness) may enter into a
ritual chamber (enter into a "waking state" in which his mind is fully active), invoke a
spirit of destruction (create the mental image of the spirit within his subjective mind),
and command the spirit to go forth and destroy his enemy (send out the mental
"transmission" of hate.) It matters not weather spirits exist objectively or not. They are
real to the magician who invokes them and to the victim who suffers the force of the
mental "transmission".

If spirits or demons exist objectively, as actual intelligent beings, then one might think
that they would have more important things to do than appear before a "magic circle"

57
and serve the whims of mere mortals. One might also think that there would then be
one "correct" tradition of magic and one "true" pantheon of deities. This is not at all the
case. All systems of magic use similar techniques and work relatively the same. The fact
that magic based on the worship of pagan gods has the same efficiency as magic based
on the Judaeo-Christian Caballa and Gnosticism, shows that it is the techniques used
(and their effect upon the practitioner's mind) which accounts for magical powers and
not the particular deities or spirits called upon.

Many spirits are accredited with giving knowledge of "arts and sciences". The "Lesser
Key of Solomon", a book of goetic sorcery, lists 72 demons which Solomon allegedly
bound inside a brazen vessel. This Cabalistic tale has its origin in the Babylonian legend
of the 72 Lords of the Djin. The word demon comes from the Greek "daemon", an
influencing spirit of intelligence. Djin (or genie) is also the root of the word "genius."
Although the word "genius" is often used by the mundane, he who is called a "genius" is
said to be under the influence of an intelligence, daemon, or genie. If demons do not
exist objectively (only subjectively), then the question arises: how can we explain
sudden knowledge acquired through contact with a spirit?

Parapsychologists, in the study of telepathy, clairvoyance, and precognition, have only

been able to prove the existence of telepathy. The reason for this is that, while there is a
great deal of evidence concerning the precognition of future events, it can always be
attributed to telepathic communication. The same is true of clairvoyance and
clairaudience. The clairvoyant who sees the spirit of a woman's dead grandfather
standing beside her does not see the actual spirit of the man but, instead, reads the mind
of the woman and, from the image of the man in her mind, imagines him as a spirit.

In dealing with the question of "acquired" knowledge, we may consider that all
knowledge humankind has acquired resides in someone's mind. Reading the mind of an
unknown subject thousands of miles distant, the magician may acquire instant
knowledge of various "arts and sciences". This does not prove the objective existence of
demons, only the ability of the human mind to become a powerful "receiver" and
"transmitter" of telepathic signals. Unlike the mundane, who are influenced
continuously by thoughts which are not their own, the magician may "receive" the
information he desires without being controlled by the desires or aims of others.

There is an interesting phenomenon which occurs in magic and which involves the
creation of thought-forms. The magician can create an image within his subjective mind
and "impose" it upon the objective world so that it influences the subjective minds of all
those individuals who come into contact with it. Objects may be charged with this
magical energy and become "charmed" or "cursed". Within a magical group or coven a
group-consciousness develops and acts as if it were an individual entity. These thought-
forms are also responsible for buildings and locations assuming an aura; becoming
"sacred", "holy", "defiled", "unholy", etc.

Thought-forms were used by Egyptian magicians to guard burial chambers and resulted
in the deaths of archaeologists thousands of years later. This phenomenon cannot be
explained by telepathy but is rather a form of magnetism or mesmerism, concerning
which much research has also been done. The question arises: If spirits or demons are
invoked by the magician and exist within his subconscious mind, do they also assume an

58
objective existence (as thought-forms) separate from the magician himself? Do gods and
deities exist simply on account of man's belief in and worship of them as such? If this is,
in fact, the case then the magician may use telepathic (and vocal) communication to
communicate with (summon)all manner of gods, angels, and demons as well as to
control the minds of other men.

Having given you a completely rational explanation for magic, I must now point out that
magic will not work if it is approached from an intellectual perspective. The reason for
this is that Magical Art is the domain of the right-side of the brain, the part responsible
for artistic talent, and not the left-side of the brain, the part responsible for logic and
reason. It is the subconscious mind, the irrational mind, the artistic mind with its
dreams, fantasies, and intuitions which is responsible for the "reception" and
"transmission" of these telepathic signals. Beneath the surface of man's conscious mind
is a world of fantasy and wonder to which the rational mind is an "outcast".

As long as the rational mind is excluded from the subconscious, it will question the
existence or importance of anything involving the subconscious to which it is not a part.
Hence, the sceptic will question the validity of magic even when he is influenced
subconsciously by the will of others. Only He who would practice the Magical Art need
believe in its power.

The Dynamic Universe

In considering the true nature of God, one must first consider the nature of man and of
the universe, for without understanding himself or the universe in which he lives how
can man approach an understanding of God? Each man possesses a consciousness
independent of any other creature. He is aware of a separation between himself and the
world around him. He experiences images, sounds, scents, tastes, and physical forms
through what he perceives as his physical body. He also experiences thoughts, emotions,
and other phenomena which do not manifest either visibly or audibly but which
influence him nonetheless and which he perceives as coming from "within" his
consciousness.

From the earliest times, man has attempted to reconcile this condition of "separation
from the universe". Early man, in terror of the images and sounds which bombarded
him from all directions and of the earth which seemed ready to swallow him once more
as if the universe itself realized that it had made a terrible mistake, scared of this thing
called "life" and yet equally scared of death, began to imagine hideous gods and demons
all about him. These monsters which roared with anger and surely had the power to
destroy him would have to be appeased or else death could be imminent.

As man survived fire and flood, disease and famine, the anxiety he felt concerning his
condition lessened. Man learned o live and even thrive in a hostile and evil world.
Civilizations rose to power and raised up animistic deities as gods who now demanded
worship and sacrifice in return for their beneficence and blessing. The threat was no
longer against an individual man but against an entire society. To gain the favour of the
gods, these deities had to be appeased or else famine, pestilence, or war might come
upon a nation and destroy it.

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Ultimately, the priests of many of these gods decided that their particular deity was the
true god, that all other gods were devils, and that the followers of other gods had be
converted or destroyed. Egypt was decimated by the Osirians as they attempted to
eliminate the earlier religions. In the Middle East, the Hebrews went to war with the
surrounding nations to annihilate them. Out of the cults of Baal and Osirus, Tammuz and
Dmuzi, Mithra and Zoroaster, rose a sacrificial-god religion which would dominate
Europe for centuries to come. The age of paganism had ended and the age of theocracy
had begun. Long after the purpose of the gods they represented had passed, theocracies
used their "divine" authority to wage religious wars against supposed "infidels" and
persecutions of non-believers.

Many people today have rejected the established religions of the past. This is natural
when you consider that, while society has changed, the teachings and doctrines of these
religions have not changed in over a thousand years. Many cannot reconcile the values
and beliefs of society with the values and beliefs of the dominant religions within
society. We are at a point in history where the dominant religions of the past will be
displaced by religions whose values are in greater accordance with society's values
today. This is why many people have sought out new religions and have turned to Wicca
and new age philosophies or to alternative religious cults such as Heaven's Gate and the
Solar Temple.

While cults devoted to new age mysticism or white light magic and spirituality have had
some success among those seeking for "something, ... anything spiritual", due principally
to Christianity's impoverishment of the ego and starvation of the intellect, they are
ultimately no more relevant to today's society than the religions of the past.

The world is searching for a religion which embraces the scientific knowledge of today,
recognizes the psychological nature of man, and perceives the potential of man to
achieve far more than he has already, while holding to ethical beliefs and values held by
society today, and possessing a willingness to change those values and beliefs in
accordance with future changes in society. Despite some individuals who see in
Satanism nothing more than anti-Christianity, a depraved religion of blasphemism or an
expression for anti-social desires and impulses, the emphasis of Satanism on the ego
and the intellect and its recognition of man's ultimate potential have made it the one
religion relevant in today's society.

But to return to the question at hand, what is the true nature of God? If, by God, one is
referring not to a specific deity man has devised but to a controlling force or intellect
within the universe, then it is clear to me that God, like the universe and everything
within the universe, is in a continuous state of change and evolution. What I am
suggesting is that God, like matter, energy, or consciousness, is "dynamic" not "static".
Descartes said, "I think therefore I am," but is this really true? In that which I perceive as
my "mind" there is a continuous stream of thoughts which flows through me like a river.
But am I my thoughts or am I the thing in which my thoughts manifest? Is the river the
water which fills the river, or is the river the rock and dirt over which the water flows?
Or is "river" simply a name I have given to that which I perceive from the visual image of
water moving over rock and dirt? And yet, a river from one moment to the next is not
the same river, for the water in the river is not composed of the same water particles,
and a man is not the same from one moment to the next, since his thoughts and

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impressions change with each passing moment.

If a man thinks for a moment that he has achieved enlightenment and understanding,
the pool of thought he calls consciousness stagnates and, as a cess-pool, breeds worms
and stenches like a swamp. The science of today is the superstition of tomorrow and the
genius of today the know-nothing of tomorrow, for as the universe evolves towards
ever greater levels of consciousness the very concept of truth, enlightenment, or
wisdom changes with it. I AM not, but am becoming. The universe IS not, but is
becoming. And if I, who possess consciousness, am becoming, then the consciousness
which guides and/or controls the universe, from which my consciousness has its source,
must also be becoming. The dialectic method of thesis/anti-thesis and synthesis is the
process by which the universal dynamic evolves. I am not my flesh or my blood. I am not
my brain or my body. In realizing that the "I AM" of my being is pure consciousness, I
realize that I am God; I am the universe made manifest. And that which I call Lucifer, the
embodiment of wisdom and enlightenment, is also changing, is also becoming. It is
within me, it flows through me, it is what the "I AM" of my being is.

I am Lucifer. I am Satan. There is one thing common to all gods man has created. Every
man-made god is static and unchanging. Yahweh resides in heaven, unchanging,
unbending, the creator of the universe and all that it contains. Christ sits at the right
hand of God ready to judge the living and the dead. Zeus resides in Mount Olympus
holding aloft the lightning bolt, his symbol of divine power. The values of society and the
structure of its institutions are defined as "good." That which threatens society is
defined as "evil." The definitions of good or evil change from nation to nation and from
century to century. God is defined by that which is "static" and unchanging. That which
is "dynamic", a potential threat to the status-quo such as war, revolution, political
unrest, or social upheaval, is represented by the Devil. But, if the universe is dynamic
not static and consciousness is NOT but is becoming then the devil, Satan, more
accurately reflects the true nature of God than Christ, Yahweh, or any other image of
God which man has defined.

The Sumerians believed the Dragon of Chaos, Tiamat, to be the mother of the gods. The
gods brought order to Chaos, but they were themselves the children of Chaos and
subject to its laws and conditions. The devil was not originally a "rebel" against the
order of creation but, the beginning and the end, the source of all creation. "The dragon
sleeps," we are told in the texts of old, "but shall awaken." In the alchemical treatise, the
Kybalion, it is said that "the All is Mind" and "the Universe is Mental." The modern
physicist, in accordance with this principle of alchemy that matter and energy are
mental phenomena and that "everything vibrates", has stated that the electrons and
protons within the atom are composed of waves with various charges and rates of
vibration. The Universe is not, but is BECOMING! God is not, but is BECOMING! When
Lucifer has risen, when man has become God, then it shall be known that the Aeon of
Lucifer has begun.

Concerning Christianity
The earliest Christians approached Christianity as a philosophy compatible with other
philosophical beliefs. The Gnostic Christians saw no conflict between the Christian
religion and the mystery schools of Greece and Rome. Among the Celts, Christianity was

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adopted by the Druids and was practiced alongside the earlier pagan religion. The
Greeks and Romans approached Christianity from an intellectual perspective. The
scriptures were accepted within the context in which they had been written and were
not interpreted as the literal Word of God.

The acceptance of Christianity as the official religion of Rome (and creation of the
Roman Catholic Church) signalled the end of this intellectual Christianity and the start
of a new authoritarian Christianity. In its rise to dominance, the Church proclaimed
earlier pagan religions to be forms of devil-worship and condemned millions of
innocent men, women, and children to death. Various Gnostic sects were among those
executed. Intellectual freedom was suppressed and obedience to the Church was
demanded.

With the Age of Enlightenment and the eventual separation of church and state, a new
emotional Christianity took the place of the authoritarian Christianity. The new
Christianity espoused faith in Jesus, the person, as the saviour of man and the redeemer
of the world. The Bible was accepted as the living Word of God by those claiming to be
reborn in Christ. In emotional fervour many Christians would take up serpents, speak in
tongues, and witness miracles performed by faith healers. This is the Christianity we
have been left with today, a religion of blind faith and superstition - intolerant of all
others faiths.

Many have rejected Christianity today because of what they see as the utter
ridiculousness of its ceremonies and the complete ignorance of its followers. There is
much wisdom to be found in Christian scripture, however, if one has the time to read
the many books which have been published in the Bible. One should bear in mind that
many other "holy books" have been written which have not been included in the Bible
and that, in addition to "inspired" writings like the Bible and the Koran, there is much
wisdom to be found in the writings of the many philosophers throughout history. Only
by accepting the Bible for what it is, a book written by men and not the "living" Word of
God, can one approach a true understanding of these scriptures.

Read from a "satanic" perspective, the Bible reveals itself as a history of Hebrew
magicians and sorcerers. In a careful reading of the Bible, the prophets of the Old
Testament are shown to be practitioners of the Black Arts and Jesus Christ, in his stance
against hypocrisy and self-righteousness, is revealed as a great Satanic Priest and Black
Magician. To the inquiring mind it is clear why the Magi of Persia (the Wise Men), were
the first to acknowledge the birth of Christ, for through their Magical Art and the
practice of Astrology, they recognized him as a naturally born magician. The eighteen
lost years of his life were surely spent in the east studying the knowledge of the Magi.
The practitioner of the Black Arts may be the truest Christian and he who would follow
the Dark Path set out in this book the truest Apostle of Christ

The Aeon of Lucifer

To the true sorcerer there is no "good" and no "evil"; there is only his WILL. This is the
basis of Crowley's Law of Thelema. Those who interpret Crowley's law "do what thou
WILL" as "do what you want" fail to understand that it is the magical WILL Crowley is
referring to. What the sorcerer desires (or thinks that he desires) may not be the thing

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which his "higher self" has truly WILLED to occur. Expanding upon the Law of Thelema,
Michael Aquino conceptualized and proclaimed the Word XEPER, by which the sorcerer
may "become" and ultimately attain his true WILL, and the realization of his "higher
self". Without Thelema, Xeper could never have been, for it is by THELEMA that XEPER
is possible.

XEPER is the Egyptian word which means "to become". In this context, it means the
achievement of one's higher self (what in Abramelin Magic is called the "Knowledge and
Conversation of your Holy Guardian Angel.") Many "Aeon Strengthening" words were
also spoken during the Aeon of Set. Magus Lewis conceptualized the cycle by which one
"became" and declared it in the word REMANIFEST. Magus Flowers conceptualized the
unknown, the hidden, and declared it in the word RUNA. As a traveller might walk for
days and never reach the horizon, RUNA is that horizon. As a traveller might walk for
days only to find that everywhere he sleeps is "here" not "there", REMANIFEST is
"here". XEPER is the process of "becoming"; RUNA is the horizon of all that is unknown
and beyond your understanding; REMANIFEST is "here" (the point at which you have
"manifested"); and XEM is "there" (the place to which your "higher self" is guiding you.)
XEM may be any destination, but realizing that man's ultimate goal is to become God,
XEM becomes DEITUS.

DEITUS is the achievement of the power of a God. To become a God, you must realize
that you are a God. It has been commonly believed that God created the universe. It is
actually the universe which is creating God. Satan is a metaphor for man. The rise of
Lucifer is the rise of man to his eventual destiny. The Aeon of Lucifer did not destroy the
Aeon of Set, but augmented it. Set is the "dynamic" of the universe, the source
consciousness which - through man- is creating God. "The Word of the Aeon is - DEITUS
- for man has become God, Lucifer has risen, the dragon has awaken, the gates have
been flung wide and the heavens have been conquered. The Ancient Ones rule once
more. By your WILL alone, the genetic code of man has been altered. By THELEMA and
by XEPER, you are now DEITUS! A new race, a superior race, has been born. No longer
shall you be called "Homo Sapien"; you are now "Homo Deitus"! No longer shall you be
called Man for you have become God. You and your seed shall live immortal upon the
earth, as gods upon the earth. The Aeon of Lucifer has begun! Nations of the earth bow
down before my chosen ones. Men of the earth bow down before my chosen ones. Kings
of the earth bow down before my chosen ones. You, who have served me faithfully, shall
take your place as gods upon the earth!"

Each Aeon represents a stage in the non-natural evolution of man. DEITUS could not
have been proclaimed as an Aeon enhancing word within the Aeon of Set since it
changed this relationship between man and the universe. The Aeon of Isis was a time
when man lived in close harmony with the natural world and the dominant religions
involved the worship of nature (the pre-Christian pagan world.) The Aeon of Osirus,
which followed it, was a time when man rejected the natural world, accepting self-
denial and sacrifice of the flesh and body as the ideal. In the west, Christianity rose as a
dominant religion during that time.

The Aeon of Osirus ended and the Aeon of Horus began April 4, 1904 when Aleister
Crowley, Magus of the Aeon of Horus, uttered the Word THELEMA (the Greek word for
Will). The WILL in this context was a magical WILL,for in the Aeon of Horus man would

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no longer be bound by the death-cults of the past. The Age of Satan began April 30, 1966
when Anton LaVey spoke the words "Indulgence instead of Abstinence," thus breaking
the power of Christianity over its followers. With the Age of Satan, man was once again
free to celebrate his carnal existence. The Aeon of Set began June 21, 1975 when
Michael Aquino, Magus of the Aeon of Set, spoke the Word XEPER. In the Aeon of Set,
man would seek to attain full realization of his "higher self".

The Aeon of Lucifer began May 5, 2000 with the declaration of the word DEITUS, an
event coinciding with extensive research being conducted in genetic manipulation and
increasing international cooperation between scientists on the "human genome
project". In DEITUS, man need no longer "seek" his higher self for by THELEMA and by
XEPER he has "attained" it. DEITUS depends upon THELEMA and XEPER just as XEPER
depends upon INDULGENCE, THELEMA and RESTRICTION. Man must pass through
each preceding Aeon in order to reach the current Aeon. DEITUS does not involve the
dissolution of man's consciousness into "universal consciousness". By dissolving his
consciousness into the "universal consciousness" he would be unable to act separately
and distinctly upon the universe and would thus be unable to ever attain DEITUS.

DEITUS does not represent the end of "becoming" or the end of XEPER and
REMANIFEST. To believe for a moment that he has reached the end of the road, that he
has become a God, and that his journey is over, the sorcerer would be making a terrible
mistake. The Aeon is itself "becoming" within the universe and the universe is itself
expanding. By attaining DEITUS, the sorcerer realizes that man is "becoming a God “and
accepts "his place as a god upon the earth." His consciousness expands to the limits of
the current Aeon and he then continues to XEPER and REMANIFEST in direct
relationship to the universe.

The sorcerer realizes that his consciousness and his will are a manifestation of the
universal dynamic, which man calls SATAN. Having attained DEITUS, man becomes the
very embodiment of SATAN. The dragon (a second consciousness which contains the
knowledge of his ultimate purpose) awakens. As man becomes the embodiment of
SATAN and rises to become a God, Lucifer arises, for the rise of Lucifer is a metaphor of
man's ultimate purpose and direction. In DEITUS, you see not only the limits of the
current Aeon, but become aware of future aeons which shall come into being as the
universe evolves to ever greater levels of consciousness and man rises to his manifest
destiny.

The Dynamic Consciousness

The universe is not logical. Existence is not logical and life is not logical. How can
something come out of nothing? If ever there was nothing there should still be nothing.
How can the universe be infinite? Yet nothing can exist outside of the universe. How can
time be eternal? Yet nothing can exist outside of time. How can mass produce
consciousness? If ever a man was not conscious he should still be unconscious. The
order of the universe suggests the existence of a god but what created God? If energy
cannot be created or destroyed then there is a finite amount but what created energy?
The universe should not exist. Life should not exist. There is no logic.

The universe is not reality... It is only a dream. Consciousness alone exists. A single

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consciousness alone exists, isolated in a void of nothingness. There is no God. There is
no other consciousness besides that of the One. It sleeps. It dreams. As it awakens from
one dream, another dream begins. There is no reality for it to awake to. There is nothing
outside of consciousness. The universe seems real to the characters in the dream but
what they perceive as "self" does not exist. The consciousness of the many is the
consciousness of the One. The lives of the many are the dreams of the One.

Deep within every man this knowledge resides. This is why man sees himself in others.
What he hates in others is what he hates most in himself. What he fears in others is
what he fears most in himself. What he loves in others is what he most wants to possess
himself. How he treats his fellow man is a reflection of his true feelings towards his
individual consciousness. Those who worship "God" are fools, for they deny the reality
of the One which exists within them. Those who fear "God" are frightened of shadows
for there is nothing beyond consciousness.

Descartes said, "I think therefore I am," but what is thought? Why should man give more
credit to the pound of organic matter he calls his "brain" than he does to rock or dirt?
Can matter or energy produce consciousness; can nerve cells within the brain "think"
any more than stones upon the ground? If this were true then man would be nothing,
more than a robot following out his "programming" as designed by nature. That which
decays and rots in the ground is not the source of consciousness. Consciousness
animates the material but is not governed by it. The source consciousness is all that
exists. The One is all that is real.

A man's life is a river but what is a river? Is it the water which flows over rock and dirt,
changing from moment to moment, or is it the riverbed over which the water flow,
which changes also but over a much longer period of time. If the water is diverted, the
river dries up and a new river is formed. Can that which never existed die? Can it spend
eternity in bliss or in torment? Can it be reincarnated in another form? It cannot be said
to die if it never existed. Only the consciousness which enlivened it exists. When
consciousness is cut off by the end of flesh, it is diverted elsewhere creating new life.
There is only consciousness and it is without end.

The mystic says "deny the ego, surrender yourself to the universal consciousness." This
is folly for by rejecting one's own consciousness, the universal consciousness which
animates the individual is also rejected. If I am God made manifest then my thoughts is
the thoughts of a god and my actions are the actions of a god. My desires are the desires
of a god and my Will is the Will of a god. If I am "good" or I am "evil" then I am a god of
goodness or a god of wickedness. The sadomasochistic nature of the dynamic
consciousness becomes evident as one considers that the source consciousness which
animates all things manifests as both predator and prey. Whatever is within one's
nature to do is within the nature of God to carry out. As Aleister Crowley wrote: Every
man and every woman is a star; there is no sin in any action which is in accordance with
one's will and desire. Every soul is a manifestation of the One, the One which is divided
for love's sake and for the pleasure and pain of unique existence. The life of an
individual is of no consequence; the source consciousness alone exists, experiencing the
pleasure and torment of each life.

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The Demonic Bible
The Demonic Bible is written upon parchment made from human flesh in ink made from
human blood in a strange alien script, the language of the daemons, dark gods from a
time before the creation of man. This dark book contains the magic of the Ancient Ones.
Many of its rituals involve human sacrifice, cannibalism, rape, and torture. The Demonic
Bible has been revealed, at least in part, to those sorcerers and magicians throughout
history who have walked the Dark Path.

These magicians have translated passages from the Demonic Bible into various
languages, often changing certain words in order to hide the true nature of the work.
The Grimoire of Abramelin the Mage, the ClaviculaSolomonis, the Book of Shadows, and
the Necronomicon are among the many books transcribed from the dread pages of the
Demonic Bible.

The Demonic Bible was shown to the magician John Dee. Dee translated eighteen of the
"demonic" keys from the strange demonic language in which the Demonic Bible is
written. When Dee translated his Keys from the Demonic Bible he named them the
Enochian Keys. They are not, as is commonly believed, named for the Enoch who
"walked with God" but rather for Enoch, the son of Cain. Cain was the first man to
perform the rituals of the Demonic Bible and he murdered his brother as a sacrifice to
the Ancient Ones. His son, Enoch, was given to the serpent from birth. This demonic
language revealed to Dee during his scrying experiments is written in an ancient script
which has been passed down for centuries by practitioners of the black arts (many of
them unaware of its origins). This script has been called by various names, but is most
commonly known today as the "theban script" or the "witch's alphabet".

The formulas in this book were revealed to me in part by my Unholy Guardian Demon,
the spirit Azael, and also in part by Astaroth, Asmodeus, Moloch, and Beelzebub. This
book includes many of the formulas given in the Demonic Bible but is not the entire
Demonic Bible, the unholy book being thousands of pages in length in its entirety. When
originally revealed to me by the spirit Azael, this work included only the crossing of four
gates, corresponding with the four "Princes of Hell", and an extraneous book dealing
with the invocation of the dead. I performed the rituals and experienced the "crossing of
the gates" within extremely vivid and symbolic dreams. Since then the spirits have
revealed additional rituals to me. This book has been a work in progress. It has evolved
over the last ten years as I have progressed along the Dark Path. Rituals which enhanced
the work have been added while rituals which did not have any noticeable benefit have
been discarded. Having performed the rituals in this book countless times, I have been
able to perfect the formula whereby the magician may attain knowledge and power
beyond description.

Rituals dealing with the invocation of spirits of the dead and resurrection of corpses as
well as magical seals, charms, and spells have been omitted from this book in order to
avoid such things being used foolishly by those who have no interest in magic beyond
the acquisition of wealth and the satisfaction of vain ambitions. If you desire it the
spirits will reveal to you all manner of sorceries whereby you may attain that which you
desire. This book provides the key to crossing the Gates of Hell and becoming one with

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the Forces of Darkness. Rather than give you spells, charms, and seals for material
benefit, this book provides you with the means to aquire these things yourself.

Initial to performing these rituals, you must take a "Bath of Purification", a bath in salt
water. The reason for this is that salt is a universal purgant. Taking a bath in salt water
will remove any psychic influence, either "positive" or "negative". This will remove any
curse or blessing and temporarily eliminate the presence of any spirit or demon. Fill
your bath with hot water, throw a cup of rock salt into the bath, and then enter into the
water. You must submerge your entire body in the water to ensure that all psychic
influence is removed from you. Once done, you will be in a "neutral" starting position
from which to begin these rites. It is important that you only do this once, preliminary to
performing these rites. If you take another "Bath of Purification" later you will have to
start the rituals over again.

On the same day that you take a "Bath of Purification", you must also wash the sheets
and blankets from your bed, wash your clothes, and clean your ritual chamber and
sleeping chamber. Quitting the bath, you must dry yourself with a clean towel and put
on clean clothes. This initial process of "Consecration" is in accordance with all of the
ancient grimoires involving ceremonial magic or the invocation of spirits. You must
avoid, however, the temptation of becoming fanatical at this point concerning
cleanliness. According to the Book of Leviticus, "if you touch anything that is unclean, sit
upon anything that is unclean, or eat anything that is unclean you will become unclean."
It is not absolute purity which is required but simply a washing off of external
vibrations which may negatively influence these rites.

The question of whether or not anything is every really "clean" is an interesting one to
consider. The moment you step out of the bath, psychic influences will begin to attach
themselves to you. If you are psychically attunes, you may be more aware than usual of
these influences. Any "guardian" spirits or intelligence's you have acquired will be
outside your bath awaiting your return. You may ask, what then is the point of the "Bath
of Consecration"? External influences may never be completely neutralized; however,
many influences will be eliminated, including those unwanted influences which are
prone to hinder the operation of your rituals. The bath also serves as a separation
between your old life and new life. As a new born infant emerges from the fluid of the
womb to a new life, so will you emerge from the waters of Leviathan to be reborn in the
image of Satan?

These rites do not require an altar, sword, dagger, bell, gong, robe, wand, or any other
ritual implement. Although not essential to these rites, you may choose to burn candles
and incense. If this is done, only black candles should be used. Any "dark" or "evil"
incense may be used in these rituals but I recommend patchouli (graveyard dust). You
will require a piece of paper, a pen, and a plate on which to place the burning parchment
on the night you burn the pact giving your body, mind, and soul to Lucifer. You will also
require a bowl of water on the night you perform the baptism (this is "unholy" water).
You will further require a small jar of oil for your anointing on the night you receive
your ordination (this is "unholy" anointing oil.) You may use any glass or cup as a
"chalice". You may use any liquid as an "elixir" (I have often used coffee rather than
liquor since coffee is a stimulant which I found enhances the work more than alcohol.)

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You may wear any clothing if you do not have a robe, although you may prefer to dress
in black.

Each ritual builds upon the previous rituals. Each alignment you make requires that
previous alignments have been made. Each gate you cross requires that previous gates
have been crossed. You must perform these rites in the order they are presented and
you must not perform them outside of the context in which they are here given. If you
are an experienced sorcerer, you may choose to perform one ritual each night, i.e..
"Renunciation & Proclamation" on the first night, "Lord's Prayer backwards" on the
second night, "Pact giving body, mind, & soul" on the third night, etc. If you are less
experienced, you may find it more beneficial to spend an entire lunar month crossing
each gate and forming each alignment. If you cannot perform a ritual on a particular
night, then continue where you left off on the following night. This is not a ritual which
is performed within a ritual chamber for a determined length of time, but rather a
magical operation which will take months, even years, to complete. You may, therefore,
choose to begin these rites on a night of special magical significance such as
Walpergisnaught (April 30) or Halloween (October 31). Or you may simply choose to
begin around the full moon or the new moon.

The rituals can take any form you choose. It is not essential to shut out all outside light
sources unless you are prone to distraction. You may adapt the rituals to your liking but
they must be committed to memory. For this reason, I have left the invocations simple
and repetitive. You will have no problem memorizing the invocations and can easily add
your own embellishments when you enter the ritual chamber.

The following is an example ritual working which a novice practitioner may wish to
employ:

Set myself apart to the Dark Lord.

Become celibate, abstain from drugs and alcohol, eat less.
Study the occult every day, perform ritual every night.

[Beginning three nights before the full moon:]

Day 1: Shave my head; take Bath of Purification in salt water.
Day 2: Recite "Renunciation & Proclamation" three times.
Day 3: Recite "Lord's Prayer" backwards three times.
Night of the Full Moon: Burn pact giving body, mind, and soul to Lucifer.

[Beginning on the night of the full moon:]

1st lunar month: Invoke the Unholy Trinity
2nd lunar month: Invoke the Nine Lords of the Abyss
3rd lunar month: Invoke my Unholy Guarian Demon.
4th lunar month: Invoke Satan (the south, fire).
5th lunar month: Invoke Lucifer (the east, air).
6th lunar month: Invoke Belial (the north, earth).
7th lunar month: Invoke Leviatan (the west, water).
8th lunar month: Perform "Ritual to Become the Devil Incarnate."
9th lunar month: Invoke Paimon (open the 1st lock of the abyss).

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Nightly Ritual
1. Dress for ritual and make any preliminary preparations.
2. Enter ritual chamber; shut out all outside light sources.
3. Light candle(s).
4. Light incense; place incense in incense burner.
5. Wait a few minutes; allow the incense to fill the room; meditate upon intent of ritual.
6. Recite preliminary statement ("I have crossed the Gates of Hell... etc.").
7. Recite incantation three or more times; until satisfied that the alignment has been
formed.
8. Drink from chalice as a sign of communion with the Forces of Darkness.
9. Extinguish candles; allow light to once again enter the ritual chamber.

In the performance of these rites you shall set yourself apart to the Forces of Darkness,
consecrate your body as a temple to the Dark Lord, cross the Gates of Hell, and become
one with the Forces of Darkness. This differs from all other systems of magic involving
the invocation of spirits. White magicians stand inside protective pentagrams wearing
protective amulets to shield themselves from the forces they call upon. In the Satanic
Bible, Anton LaVey mocked the hypocrisy of those who attempted to protect themselves
from the forces they called upon for aid. Satanic priests have known for many years that
the "Forces of Darkness" could be invoked (or more correctly "evoked") into the
sorcerer's body, but rituals of this type have never been made available to the aspiring
witch or wizard because of the inherent danger in such rituals.

In other rituals demons are invoked as external forces (friendly, perhaps, but external to
the magician) which may be directed and controlled by the Satanist. Many less-
experienced practitioners still fear these forces which they call upon as something alien
to themselves and "evil". The adept practitioner realizes that these forces are not
external (existing within the objective universe) but internal (existing within the
sorcerer's subjective mind)

What will become apparent to the practitioner of these rites is that Satan, Lucifer, Belial,
and Leviathan are aspects of the human psyche, archetypes which exist within the
subconscious and sub rational mind, not external beings which can in any way influence
the magician to good or evil ends. The objective of this system of magic is not to
"invoke" Satan to physical appearance (for that would be mere hallucination) but rather
to become Satan (or to actualize that aspect of the psyche which is called "Satan"); not
to "invoke" Lucifer but to become Lucifer; not to "invoke" Belial but to become Belial;
not to "invoke" Leviathan but to become Leviathan. The purpose of these invocations is
to achieve power, knowledge, and enlightenment by activating those parts of the brain
which have been called the "Forces of Darkness".

Scientists realize that the average human being uses less than 10% of his brain. If a
grimoire such as the Goetia of Solomon or the Grand Grimoire says that the spirit
Dantalian "will declare the secrets of all Arts and Sciences" then by stimulating the area
of brain called "Dantalian" you will understand things previously unknown to you. Just
as many animals pass their "knowledge and experience" to their offspring through their
genetic code, human beings have the ability to access "genetically transmitted"

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knowledge. If a grimoire says that the spirit Seere "will provide True revelations of
things stolen or lost" then by invoking the spirit Seerean area of the brain largely
responsible for psychic ability will be stimulated in the sorcerer and he will experience
prophetic dreams. If a grimoire says that the spirit Sitri "enflameth the love of women"
then the invocation of the spirit called Sitri will stimulate an area of the brain
responsible for personal magnetism and charisma, making the sorcerer more attractive
to members of the opposite sex.

Rituals from other systems of magic may be incorporated into the Demonic Bible,
however, the rituals of the Demonic Bible may not be performed within another system
of magic or within a group whose members have not all performed these rites and
advanced to the same level. The reason for this is that the rituals of the Demonic Bible
have a profound psychological effect upon the psyche. Improper use of these rituals
could cause "demonic possession", "mental illness" or abnormal psychological states.
Proceed cautiously through these rites taking each step in turn. If you are unsure that
you have successfully formed an alignment or crossed a gate then continue to perform
the same ritual until you are confident that you are ready to proceed to the following
ritual.

Do not be alarmed if you have extremely vivid and horrific dreams (or experience lucid
dreaming) unless you begin to have recurring nightmares. It is not uncommon to have
nightmares when you first begin these rites as your subconscious mind reacts with
horror to the "evil" it is witnessing. These dreams should be cathartic and act merely to
purge the subconscious mind of any inherited guilts and inhibitions. Recurring
nightmares, however, are a sign of deeply held fears and anxieties which could, through
continued ritual activity, evolve into some form of neurosis.

Renunciation & Proclamation (recite three times)

I renounce God.
I renounce Jesus.
I renounce the angels and archangels.
I renounce the Holy Catholic Church.
I renounce all that is holy and all that is good.
I renounce all gods.
And I proclaim that Satan Lucifer is Lord of this World.
I proclaim that Satan Lucifer is God of the Earth.
I proclaim that Satan Lucifer is my Master.
(Then drink from chalice)

[NOTES: The renunciation of the "Holy Catholic Church" is not meant as a validation of
its claim to apostolic succession as the "true" Church of God but rather as a statement of
contempt for an organization which has allowed the deaths of millions of innocent
people. The renunciation of "all that is holy and all that is good" is not a denial of
personal ethics you may hold or of social laws and values, but rather a denial of moral
codes imposed upon man by church of state. ]

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"Lord's Prayer" backwards (recite three times)
Nema! Liveemorfsurevilled tub
Noishaytpmetootni ton suhdeel
Suh tshaigasapserttathyeth
Vigrawfeuzasesapsertruasuhvigrawf.
Derbilaidruayedsithsuhvig
Nevehnisizathreni
Nudeebliweyth
Muck mod-ngikeyth
Main eytheebdwohlah
Nevehnitrachioo
Rertharfrua!
(drink from chalice)

Pact Giving Body, Mind, & Soul (write upon parchment, recite three times, then burn.)
I give my body to Lucifer.
I give my mind to Lucifer.
I give my soul to Lucifer.
My flesh is His Flesh.
My blood is His Blood.

(drink from chalice then say:)

Lucifer accept this, my sacrifice.

Consecration of Body in the name of Satan and Lucifer

I bless and consecrate these feet in the name of Satan
and in the name of Lucifer. (repeat three times).
I bless and consecrate these legs in the name of Satan
and in the name of Lucifer. (repeat three times).
I bless and consecrate these genitals in the name of
Satan and in the name of Lucifer. (repeat three times).

I bless and consecrate this penis in the name of Satan

and in the name of Lucifer. (repeat three times).
I bless and consecrate this abdomen in the name of Satan and in the name of Lucifer.
(repeat three times).

I bless and consecrate this chest in the name of Satan and in the name of Lucifer. (repeat
three times).
I bless and consecrate these buttocks in the name of Satan and in the name of Lucifer.
(repeat three times).

I bless and consecrate this back in the name of Satan and in the name of Lucifer. (repeat
three times).
I bless and consecrate these hands in the name of Satan and in the name of Lucifer.
(repeat three times).
I bless and consecrate these arms in the name of Satan and in the name of Lucifer.
(repeat three times).

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I bless and consecrate these shoulders in the name of Satan and in the name of Lucifer.
(repeat three times).

I bless and consecrate this neck in the name of Satan and in the name of Lucifer. (repeat
three times).

I bless and consecrate these eyes in the name of Satan and in the name of Lucifer.
(repeat three times).

I bless and consecrate this nose in the name of Satan and in the name of Lucifer. (repeat
three times).

I bless and consecrate this mouth in the name of Satan and in the name of Lucifer.
(repeat three times).

I bless and consecrate these ears in the name of Satan and in the name of Lucifer.
(repeat three times).

I bless and consecrate these cheeks in the name of Satan and in the name of Lucifer.
(repeat three times).

I bless and consecrate this chin in the name of Satan and in the name of Lucifer. (repeat
three times).

I bless and consecrate this forehead in the name of Satan and in the name of Lucifer.
(repeat three times).

I bless and consecrate this face in the name of Satan and in the name of Lucifer. (repeat
three times).

I bless and consecrate this head in the name of Satan and in the name of Lucifer. (repeat
three times).
I bless and consecrate this body in the name of Satan and in the name of Lucifer. (repeat
three times).

I bless and consecrate this body as a temple to the Dark Lord. (repeat three times).

I bless and consecrate this temple in the name of Satan and in the name of Lucifer.
(repeat three times).

I set myself apart to the Dark Lord and to the Forces of Darkness. (repeat three times).

I bless and consecrate this body in the name of Satan and in the name of Lucifer. (repeat
three times).

(drink from chalice)

Invocation of the Unholy Trinity

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Unholy Trinity of Hell, I invoke thee.
Unholy Trinity of Hell, I summon thee.
Unholy Trinity of Hell, I conjure thee.
Come forth, Unholy Trinity of Hell, and manifest thyself
Within this body, this temple which I have prepared.
Come forth, Unholy Trinity of Hell, and manifest thyself.
Fill me with the Unholy Spirit.
Come forth, Unholy Trinity of Hell, and manifest thyself.
(drink from chalice)

Invocation of the Unholy Spirit

Unholy Spirit, I invoke thee.
Unholy Spirit, I summon thee.
Unholy Spirit, I conjure thee.
Come forth, Unholy Spirit, and manifest thyself
Within this body, this temple which I have prepared.
Come forth, Unholy Spirit, and manifest thyself.
Come forth, Unholy Spirit, and manifest thyself.
(drink from chalice)

Invocation of the Nine Lords of the Abyss

The Nine Great Lords of the Abyss, I invoke thee.

The Nine Great Lords of the Abyss, I summon thee. The Nine Great Lords of the Abyss, I
conjure thee.
Come forth, Nine Great Lords of the Abyss, and manifest thyselves
Within this body, this temple which I have prepared.
Come forth, Nine Great Lords of the Abyss, and manifest thyselves.
Send unto me my Unholy Guardian Demon, And come forth, Nine Great Lords of the
Abyss, and manifest thyselves.
(drink from chalice)

Invocation of Your Unholy Guardian Demon

My Unholy Guardian Demon, I invoke thee.

My Unholy Guardian Demon, I summon thee.
My Unholy Guardian Demon, I conjure thee.
Come forth, my Unholy Guardian Demon, and manifest thyself.
Come forth, my Unholy Guardian Demon, and manifest thyself.
(drink from chalice)

Crossing the Gates of Hell

Invocation of Satan
To the south I call, and into the flames of Hell:
Satan, I invoke thee.
Satan, I summon thee.
Satan, I conjure thee. Come forth, Satan, and manifest thyself
Within this body, within this temple which I have prepared.
Come forth, Satan, and manifest thyself.

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Come forth, Satan, and manifest thyself.
Open wide the Gates of Hell that I may cross and become like you.
Open wide thy Gate that I may cross.
Come forth, Satan, and manifest thyself.
Come forth, Satan, and manifest thyself.
(drink from chalice)

Invocation of Lucifer
To the east I call, and into the air of enlightenment:
Lucifer, I invoke thee.
Lucifer, I summon thee.
Lucifer, I conjure thee.
Come forth, Lucifer, and manifest thyself
Within this body, within this temple which I have prepared.
Come forth, Lucifer, and manifest thyself.
Come forth, Lucifer, and manifest thyself.
Open wide the Gates of Hell that I may cross and become like you.
Open wide thy Gate that I may cross.
Come forth, Lucifer, and manifest thyself.
Come forth, Lucifer, and manifest thyself.
(drink from chalice)

Invocation of Belial To the north I call, and to the depths of the earth:
Belial, I invoke thee.
Belial, I summon thee.
Belial, I conjure thee.
Come forth, Belial, and manifest thyself Within this body, within this temple which I
have prepared.
Come forth, Belial, and manifest thyself.
Come forth, Belial, and manifest thyself.
Open wide the Gates of Hell that I may cross and become like you.
Open wide thy Gate that I may cross.
Come forth, Belial, and manifest thyself.
Come forth, Belial, and manifest thyself.
(drink from chalice)

Invocation of Leviatan
To the west I call, and to the depths of the sea:
Leviatan, I invoke thee.
Leviatan, I summon thee.
Leviatan, I conjure thee.
Come forth, Leviatan, and manifest thyself Within this body, within this temple which I
have prepared.
Come forth, Leviatan, and manifest thyself.
Come forth, Leviatan, and manifest thyself.
Open wide the Gates of Hell that I may cross and become like you.
Open wide thy Gate that I may cross.
Come forth, Leviatan, and manifest thyself.

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Come forth, Leviatan, and manifest thyself.
(drink from chalice)

Ritual to Become the Devil Incarnate

I am Satan; I am Lucifer;
I am the Devil Incarnate.
I am Belial; I am Leviatan;
I am the Devil Incarnate.
I am the south; I am the east;
I am the Devil Incarnate.
I am the north; I am the west;
I am the Devil Incarnate.
I am in fire; I am in air;
I am the Devil Incarnate.
I am in earth; I am in water;
I am the Devil Incarnate.
I am Satan; I am Lucifer;

I am the Devil Incarnate.

I am Belial; I am Leviatan;
I am the Devil Incarnate.
I am the Devil Incarnate.
(drink from chalice)

Opening the Nine Locks of the Abyss

Initial Statement
I have crossed the Gates of Hell and I have become the Devil Incarnate.
I am Satan; I am Lucifer; I am Belial; and I am Leviatan.
Within my hand I hold the keys to the locks of the Abyss.
I shall now open the Nine Locks of the Abyss by calling upon the Nine Great Lords of the
Abyss.
I shall now open the Nine Locks of the Abyss by calling upon the Nine Great Lords of the
Abyss.

Invocation of Paimon
Paimon, I invoke thee.
Paimon, I summon thee.
Paimon, I conjure thee.
Come forth, Paimon, and manifest thyself Within this body, this temple which I have
prepared.
Come forth, Paimon, and manifest thyself.
Come forth, Paimon, and manifest thyself.
(drink from chalice then say:)
The first lock is open.

Invocation of Amaymon
Amaymon, I invoke thee.
Amaymon, I summon thee.
Amaymon, I conjure thee.

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Come forth, Amaymon, and manifest thyself Within this body, this temple which I have
prepared.
Come forth, Amaymon, and manifest thyself.
Come forth, Amaymon, and manifest thyself.
(drink from chalice then say:)
The second lock is open.

Invocation of Asmodeus
Asmodeus, I invoke thee.
Asmodeus, I summon thee.
Asmodeus, I conjure thee.
Come forth, Asmodeus, and manifest thyself
Within this body, this temple which I have prepared.
Come forth, Asmodeus, and manifest thyself.
Come forth, Asmodeus, and manifest thyself.
(drink from chalice then say:)
The third lock is open.

Invocation of Beelzebub
Beelzebub, I invoke thee.
Beelzebub, I summon thee.
Beelzebub, I conjure thee.
Come forth, Beelzebub, and manifest thyself
Within this body, this temple which I have prepared.
Come forth, Beelzebub, and manifest thyself.
Come forth, Beelzebub, and manifest thyself.
(Drink from chalice then say:)
The fourth lock is open.

Invocation of Astaroth
Astaroth, I invoke thee.
Astaroth, I summon thee.
Astaroth, I conjure thee.
Come forth, Astaroth, and manifest thyself
Within this body, this temple which I have prepared.
Come forth, Astaroth, and manifest thyself.
Come forth, Astaroth, and manifest thyself.
(drink from chalice then say:)
The fifth lock is open.

Invocation of Oriens
Oriens, I invoke thee.
Oriens, I summon thee.
Oriens, I conjure thee.
Come forth, Oriens, and manifest thyself Within this body, this temple which I have
prepared.
Come forth, Oriens, and manifest thyself.
Come forth, Oriens, and manifest thyself.

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(drink from chalice then say:)
The sixth lock is open.

Invocation of Magot
Magot, I invoke thee.
Magot, I summon thee.
Magot, I conjure thee. Come forth, Magot, and manifest thyself
Within this body, this temple which I have prepared.
Come forth, Magot, and manifest thyself.
Come forth, Magot, and manifest thyself.
(drink from chalice then say:)
The seventh lock is open.

Invocation of Dagon
Dagon, I invoke thee.
Dagon, I summon thee.
Dagon, I conjure thee.
Come forth, Dagon, and manifest thyself Within this body, this temple which I have
prepared.
Come forth, Dagon, and manifest thyself.
Come forth, Dagon, and manifest thyself.
(drink from chalice then say:)
The eighth lock is open.

Invocation of Moloch
Moloch, I invoke thee.
Moloch, I summon thee.
Moloch, I conjure thee.
Come forth, Moloch, and manifest thyself Within this body, this temple which I have
prepared.
Come forth, Moloch, and manifest thyself.
Come forth, Moloch, and manifest thyself.
(drink from chalice then say:)
The ninth lock is open.

Final Statement
I have opened the Nine Locks of the Abyss.
The Abyss is open beneath me.
The Abyss is open around me.
The Abyss is open within me.
The Abyss is open within me.
I have opened the Nine Locks of the Abyss.
The Abyss is open within me.

Invocation of the Beast

Into the Abyss I call; to the depths of Hell I call; to the Beast of Revelation I call:
Beast of Revelation, I invoke thee.

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Beast of Revelation, I summon thee.
Beast of Revelation, I conjure thee.
Come forth, Beast of Revelation, and manifest thyself Within this body, this temple
which I have prepared.
Come forth, Beast of Revelation, and manifest thyself. Place thy mark upon me.
Come forth, Beast of Revelation, and manifest thyself. For I have crossed the Gates of
Hell and I have become the Devil Incarnate.
am Satan; I am Lucifer; I am Belial; and I am Leviatan.
Come forth, Beast of Revelation, and manifest thyself.
(drink from chalice)

Invocation of the Whore of Babylon

Into the Abyss I call; to the depths of Hell I call; to the Whore of Babylon I call:
Whore of Babylon, I invoke thee.
Whore of Babylon, I summon thee.
Whore of Babylon, I conjure thee.
Come forth, Whore of Babylon, and manifest thyself Within this body, this temple which
I have prepared.
Come forth, Whore of Babylon, and manifest thyself. Ride upon me as you do upon the
Beast.
Come forth, Whore of Babylon, and manifest thyself.
For I have crossed the Gates of Hell and I have become the Devil Incarnate.
I am Satan; I am Lucifer; I am Belial; and I am Leviatan.
Come forth, Whore of Babylon, and manifest thyself.
(drink from chalice)

Invocation of the dragon Choronzon

Into the Abyss I call; to the depths of Hell I call; to the dragon Choronzon I call:
Choronzon, I invoke thee.
Choronzon, I summon thee.
Choronzon, I conjure thee.
Come forth, Choronzon, and manifest thyself
Within this body, this temple which I have prepared.
Come forth, Choronzon, and manifest thyself.
Come forth, Choronzon, and manifest thyself.
For I have crossed the Gates of Hell and I have become the Devil Incarnate.
I am Satan; I am Lucifer; I am Belial; and I am Leviatan.
Come forth, Choronzon, and manifest thyself.
(drink from chalice)

Invocation of the Antichrist

Into the Abyss I call; to the depths of Hell I call; to the Antichrist I call:
Antichrist, I invoke thee.
Antichrist, I summon thee.
Antichrist, I conjure thee.
Come forth, Antichrist, and manifest thyself
Within this body, this temple which I have prepared.
Come forth, Antichrist, and manifest thyself.
Come forth, Antichrist, and manifest thyself.

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For I have crossed the Gates of Hell and I have become the Devil Incarnate.
I am Satan; I am Lucifer; I am Belial; and I am Leviatan.
Come forth, Antichrist, and manifest thyself.
(drink from chalice)

Invocation of Dracula (Ritual to Become a Vampire)

Dracula, I invoke thee.
Dracula, I summon thee.
Dracula, I conjure thee.
Come forth, Dracula, and manifest thyself Within this body, this temple which I have
prepared.
Come forth, Dracula, and manifest thyself.
Drink of my blood that I may become like you, That I may become one of the undead,
one with the Forces of Darkness.
Come forth, Dracula, and manifest thyself.
For I have crossed the Gates of Hell and I have become the Devil Incarnate.
I am Satan; I am Lucifer; I am Belial; and I am Leviatan.
Come forth, Dracula, and manifest thyself.
(drink from chalice)

Invocation of Lycanthrope (Ritual to Become a Werewolf)

Lycanthrope, I invoke thee.
Lycanthrope, I summon thee.
Lycanthrope, I conjure thee.
Come forth, Lycanthrope, and manifest thyself Within this body, this temple which I
have prepared.
Come forth, Lycanthrope, and manifest thyself.
Eat of my flesh that I may become like you, That I may become one of the undead, one
with the Forces of Darkness. Come forth, Lycanthrope, and manifest thyself.
For I have crossed the Gates of Hell and I have become the Devil Incarnate.
I am Satan; I am Lucifer; I am Belial; and I am Leviatan.
Come forth, Lycanthrope, and manifest thyself.
(drink from chalice)

Invocation of Mormo (Ritual to Become a Ghoul)

Mormo, I invoke thee.
Mormo, I summon thee.
Mormo, I conjure thee.
Come forth, Mormo, and manifest thyself Within this body, this temple which I have
prepared.
Come forth, Mormo, and manifest thyself.
Drink of my blood and eat of my flesh that I may become like you, That I may become
one of the undead, one with the Forces of Darkness.
Come forth, Mormo, and manifest thyself.
For I have crossed the Gates of Hell and I have become the Devil Incarnate.
I am Satan; I am Lucifer; I am Belial; and I am Leviatan.
Come forth, Mormo, and manifest thyself.
(drink from chalice)

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Invocation of Legion (Ritual to Become Demonically Possessed)
Legion, I invoke thee.
Legion, I summon thee.
Legion, I conjure thee.
Come forth, Legion, and manifest thyself Within this body, this temple which I have
prepared.
Come forth, Legion, and manifest thyself.
Enter into this body that I may become like you, That I may become one with the Forces
of Darkness.
Come forth, Legion, and manifest thyself. For I have crossed the Gates of Hell and I have
become the Devil Incarnate.
I am Satan; I am Lucifer; I am Belial; and I am Leviatan.
Come forth, Legion, and manifest thyself.
(drink from chalice)

Death & Resurrection

Baptism
I give myself as a sacrifice upon the altar of Satan. (repeat three times.)
I descend into the underworld, crossing the River Styx; I enter the underworld. (repeat
three times.)
(dip forefinger of left hand in "unholy water", draw upside down cross upon forehead,
then say:)
I am baptized in the River Styx and in the Flames of Hell. (repeat three times.)

Invocation of the Lord of the Underworld

I call upon the Lord of the Underworld, the Lord of the Dead.
Pluto, Hades, Anubis, Samhein, Kutha,
Lord of the Underworld, Lord of the Dead,
Come forth and manifest thyself.
Lord of the Underworld, I invoke thee.
Lord of the Underworld, I summon thee.
Lord of the Underworld, I conjure thee.
Come forth, Lord of the Underworld, and manifest thyself
Within this body, this temple which I have prepared.
Come forth, Lord of the Underworld, and manifest thyself.
Come forth, Lord of the Underworld, and manifest thyself.

Invocation of the Queen of the Underworld

I have called upon the Lord of the Underworld, the Lord of the Dead.
And by calling upon the Lord of the Underworld I have become the Lord of the
Underworld.
I am Pluto; I am Hades; I am Anubis; I am Samhein; I am Kutha.
I sit upon the Throne of the Underworld as Lord of the Underworld and Lord of the
Dead.
I take the Queen of the Underworld, the Queen of the Dead as my wife and as my lover.
Hela, Persephone, Proserpine, Ereshkigal, Queen of the Underworld, Queen of the Dead
Come forth and manifest thyself.
Queen of the Underworld, I invoke thee.

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Queen of the Underworld, I summon thee.
Queen of the Underworld, I conjure thee.
Come forth, Queen of the Underworld, and manifest thyself Within this body, this
temple which I have prepared.
Come forth, Queen of the Underworld, and manifest thyself.
Come forth, Queen of the Underworld, and manifest thyself.
Attach thyself unto me as my wife and as my lover. Take me as thy husband and lover.
Come forth, Queen of the Underworld, and manifest thyself.

[NOTES: The female practitioner should adapt these rituals so that she "becomes" the
Queen of the Underworld, the Queen of the Dead, and takes the Lord of the Underworld
as her husband and lover. In either case, the ritual will be followed by a consummation
of the marriage. To experience sexual union with non-physical entities you need only lie
on your back in your bed with your arms at your side. You should be in a position in
which you are completely relaxed and comfortable since you will have to remain in the
exact position for several hours without moving. After ten to fifteen minutes without
moving you will begin to feel the touch of non-visible hands. You will find that you are
able to communicate with the non-physical entities in your mind. As you have
intercourse with these beings, you may experience the feeling that you are "rocking" or
"moving" within your body. This is a form of meditation and the feeling of "moving" out
of your body (taken to the extreme of astral and physical separation) is commonly
called Astral Projection. ]

Ordination
I have given myself as a sacrifice upon the altar of Satan.
I have descended into the underworld, crossing the River Styx.
I have been baptized in the River Styx and in the Flames of Hell.
I have called upon the Lord of the Underworld, the Lord of the Dead,
And in calling upon the Lord of the Underworld, the Lord of the Dead,
I have become the Lord of the Underworld, the Lord of the Dead.
I have sat upon the Throne of the Underworld, as Lord of the Underworld and Lord of
the Dead.
I have taken the Queen of the Underworld, the Queen of the Dead, as my wife and as my
lover.
But I am reborn in the Image of Satan, as a living demon in the flesh.
(dip forefinger of left hand in "unholy anointing oil", draw inverted pentagram on
forehead, then say:)
I am Ordained as a priest of the Dark Lord and as an Ambassador of His Infernal Empire.

Invocation of the Lord of the Earth

I call upon the Lord of the Earth, the Horned God of the Earth.
Pan, Bacchus, Dionysus, Kernunnos, Herne,
Lord of the Earth, Horned God of the Earth,
Come forth and manifest thyself.
Lord of the Earth, I invoke thee.
Lord of the Earth, I summon thee.
Lord of the Earth, I conjure thee.
Come forth, Lord of the Earth, and manifest thyself
Within this body, this temple which I have prepared. Come forth, Lord of the Earth, and

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manifest thyself. Come forth, Lord of the Earth, and manifest thyself.

Invocation of the Queen of the Earth

I have called upon the Lord of the Earth, the Horned God of the Earth.
And in calling upon the Lord of the Earth I have become the Horned God of the Earth.
I am Pan; I am Bacchus; I am Dionysus; I am Kernunnos; I am Herne.
I sit upon the Throne of the Infernal Empire, as Lord of the living and the dead.
I take the Queen of the Earth also as my wife and as my lover.
Ishtar, Inanna, Isis, Demeter, Ceres,
Queen of the Earth, Goddess of pleasure and fertility, Come forth and manifest thyself.
Queen of the Earth, I invoke thee.
Queen of the Earth, I summon thee.
Queen of the Earth, I conjure thee.
Come forth, Queen of the Earth, and manifest thyself Within this body, this temple which
I have prepared.
Come forth, Queen of the Earth, and manifest thyself. Come forth, Queen of the Earth,
and manifest thyself. Attach thyself unto me as my wife and as my lover.
Take me as thy husband and thy lover.
Come forth, Queen of the Earth, and manifest thyself.

[ NOTES: Once again, the female practitioner will have to adapt these rituals so that she
"becomes" the Queen of the Earth and takes the Horned God as her husband and lover.
You will find that these rituals are easily adaptable to your particular situation. Where
the male practitioner says, "I have crossed the Gates of Hell and have become the Devil
Incarnate: I am Satan, I am Lucifer, I am Belial, and I am Leviathan," the female
practitioner will say something similar to: "I have crossed the Gates of Hell and have
become the Goddess of Darkness: I am Astaroth, I am Ishtar, I am Hela." The distinction
between male and female entities need only be made, however, in the symbolic
marriage to the "Forces of Darkness" and the male practitioner should not fear calling
both male and female beings into himself. As a spiritual being, the sorcerer is neither
male nor female. Only in the form which his physical body has taken is sex a
consideration.

Through transmigration of the soul, the sorcerer may choose incarnation in bodies of
various races and sex. Many spirits and demons also choose to take male and female
forms. For example, Astaroth (a male demon) is also Ishtar (a female demoness,
originally the goddess of Babylon). The devil has been personified in art and in
literature as an adrogenous being, with both the breasts of a woman and the erect penis
of a man. To attain union with the "Forces of Darkness", the sorcerer will summon both
male and female beings into himself. The marriage should be in the form of a
male/female union, however, regardless of the practitioner's sexual inclinations since
magical marriage follows a natural balance (yin/yang, anima/animus) which exists in
the physical world. ]

Crossing the Planetary Spheres

Initial Statement
I have crossed the Gates of Hell and I have become the Devil Incarnate.

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I am Satan; I am Lucifer; I am Belial; and I am Leviatan.
I shall now cross the Planetary Sphere, the seven spheres above the earth.

Invocation of Hecate
Hecate, I invoke thee.
Hecate, I summon thee.
Hecate, I conjure thee.
Come forth, Hecate, and manifest thyself
Within this body, this temple which I have prepared.
Come forth, Hecate, and manifest thyself.
Come forth, Hecate, and manifest thyself.
Open wide thy gate that I may cross.
Open wide thy gate that I may ascend the planetary spheres.
Come forth, Hecate, and manifest thyself.
Come forth, Hecate, and manifest thyself.
(drink from chalice, then say:) I have crossed the Lunar Sphere.

Invocation of Thoth
Thoth, I invoke thee.
Thoth, I summon thee.
Thoth, I conjure thee. Come forth, Thoth, and manifest thyself Within this body, this
temple which I have prepared.
Come forth, Thoth, and manifest thyself.
Come forth, Thoth, and manifest thyself.
Open wide thy gate that I may cross.
Open wide thy gate that I may ascend

The Demonic Bible, is written by TsirkSusej

Servant & Disciple of the Dark Lord

As revealed to him by his Unholy Guardian Demon, the spirit
Azael.

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 After reading the demonic book, I was confused, to my greatest
surprise, I was seriously contemplating if I should become or not. To me,
this was it, this was the key to the power I enthusiastically sought, I wanted
to grab it. But then, something within me keeps telling me it's a Greek gift
and I should beware. For long I was seriously contemplating, saying this
was a means to liberate my family especially from those who oppressed
him. Many people owed my dad; people were selling our lands and claiming
my dad's properties just because he had nobody to fight for him. He refused
to perpetrate their evil with them; he chose to stay true to his God. But his
God failed him, his church failed him, the truth he stood for rejected him for
it refused to vindicate him. Every night, he'll pray and weep to his God, he'll
recite the rosary like it was a billion dollar presentation, but it always
seems the immaculate virgin is too busy and heaven is too far to hear him. I
was always abused as a kid, my parents inculcated in me the doctrine of
turning the other cheek from infancy, I was prohibited from fighting as a
child, no matter the ill meted on me, I must have to come home and report.
So I became an instrument of abuse by class and pear mates, they know I
wouldn't fight back, I was always too scared to fight back, not scared of
mates, but of daddy at home. I was always too scared to get into trouble,
not scared of the trouble, but scared of daddy at home, no matter how
much of on my right I was, I'll always get the beatings because from the
gospel according to dad, if I wasn't in the way of trouble, I wouldn't get into
trouble. So I always tried to swallow every mess so it wouldn't get home,
every homeboy around knew me as the guy who takes the beatings. It
affected my psyche on relationship with people plus given the fact I was
born autistic. When the beast in me couldn't take it any longer, when it
finally broke its chains and broke out of cage, when I became the evil spirit
of the street, I got myself entangled to a movement that more or less
became my authority figure, and I again became subjected to beatings
because I wouldn't go against my ethical ideology of equal right and justice.
I saw this becoming of a thing as the way out, the breakaway from all the

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injustice, maltreatments, abuse and evils meted on me and my immediate
family. But something was still holding me back, I had this strong feels that
everything wasn't alright, so I couldn't pull through, I couldn't become, not
that I couldn't, I didn't just want to, so I abandoned the book where I hid it
for couple of weeks.

One evening, I was in my room seeing a movie when all of a sudden

the television tripped off, the clock hanging on my wall fell and broke and
immediately, I felt for a while, the presence of a strong angry spirit in my
room and like as immediate as it came, it vanished and I went into what
seemed to me a trance. My uncle came to me, this time around not as
petting as he used to, like he was angry or disappointed or some sort. He
told me he knew the reason I was having a second thought is because of my
faith, but he will teach me a truth I didn't know. Your entire life son, you
were lied to, Christianity isn't what you think it is dear, and Christianity is
one big body of lies and secrets. First of all is that Christianity is a
movement brought down to us by the white men to make us forgive and
forget the ill they did to us. Before the colonial masters invade any country,
they'll send the missionaries first, to them about forgiveness and the
meekness of the heart and soul, to teach them against vengeance as
vengeance should be left to God, after indoctrinating them to be zombies,
then colonial masters will come to first destroy their culture and tradition
and impose on them the white man culture, they will milk their resources
both human and natural and use them to develop their own home. The
whites use Christianity as insurance while they rob others. I'm not against
Christianity but against the concept behind Christianity, Christianity died
with Paul, it started with Paul and ended with him. The modern
Christianity is not religiously but politically oriented. The sacred book of
Christianity was collated by Constantine, a pagan ruler who sought
majority. Constantine saw that Christ before he died garnered for himself a
large multitude, even after His death, his followers multiplied, Constantine
knew fighting majority will be very disastrous, so he amalgamated
Christians with pagans. Of all the books written by revered followers and
teachers, he selected but a few, which favoured both the Christians and
pagans and called it the bible. To favour the pagans, he moved the Sabbath
day from Saturday to Sunday, in respect of the roman sun god, he moved
Christ's birthday from 6th October to 25th December, in respect of the
Romans feast of paganism. To favour the Christians, the divinity of Christ
was instituted; 18years of his life that revealed his carnality was removed
from the book. The bible itself contains lies and deceits, there are books in
the bible whose authorships were lied about, Apart from historical errors
and inaccuracy and unaccountability from the creativity (Genesis) to

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revelation, It covers up or should I say teaches ‘truth’ with lies. How can
you tell the truth by telling lies? Some of the books of the bible according to
Barth D. Ehrman were not written by the people who we thought wrote
them, books like 2 Peter, Peter did not write 2 Peter, it was written by God
knows who. Out of 13 letters of Saint Paul only 7 were really written by
him, letters like 1Timothy, Ephesians, Laodiceans, 3 Corinthians etc,
weren’t written by Paul. Paul sensed this, that someone was circulating
letters in his name that’s why in Galatians 6:11, Colossians 4:18,
2Thessalonians 3:17 and Philemon 1:19. Paul inserted signatures by
saying, “I am writing this with my own hands. Bible scholars call this lies
and deceit ‘Pseudepigrapha’. Christianity is the white men religion; they
even brought racism in to it. Jesus was Jew, a black man, yet they paint him
white, Satan is very and purely white, yet they paint him black with horns.
If you really want to know the truth my son, now let me burst your brain,
opposite of life is death; of good is evil, yet all come from the same source.
Forget what you were told my son, God and Devil, Jesus and Satan are all
the same person. Angels and demons, Holy and evil spirits are of the same
spirit, from the same source and of the same purpose. Jesus didn't come to
die for our sins, but to atone for his sins and that of his father. God created
man in his likeness, man is god, and man is naturally cruel and evil, so is
God. When man makes mistake, we call it evil; but when God make mistake,
we call it nature. God took flesh to die and beg for forgiveness for all the
evil and natural disasters He meted upon man, especially the Israelites. God
naturally is both good and evil, He created angels that will help him run his
good errands, and demons that will help him run the evil ones, but to him,
they weren't fun. They have no free will; the angels are always and only
subjected to His good wills, while the demons are always and only
subjected to his evil wills. So he procreated himself by creating man, He
saw in man his true nature, and since then he hated himself. he hated the
most powerful part of him, he out casted him and called him devil,
meaning the evil one. Darkness is the other side of light, evil is the other
side of good; they are all two sides of the same coin. The devil is the other
side of God he's trying so hard to lock up. He set out rules for man so that
man will have restrictions as to what he can do, and to have absolute
dominion over man. If you didn't know, Adam wasn't the first man He
created; neither was Eve the first woman, check out Genesis 1:27. The first
men and women He created, He created in his own image and likeness, he
created them like him, he created them to be gods for they were immortals
and he gave them no law. They are Zeus, Poseidon, and other Pantheon
gods. He saw the power they had, He saw his very own cruelty in them, so
he created a second man. He made this man mortal, made him out of dust
so he can control him Genesis 2:7. The only thing that makes man fear God

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is mortality, if man were immortal, man wouldn't need God. That
immortality is what is being offered to you now on a platter, become
immortal like me and rule the world. I was supposed to be dead since
10years ago, but here I am discussing with you. You're the chosen one dear,
the future of hell and its devils lies on your shoulders, because in you there
is no good and there is no evil. Evil and good means same thing to you, just
the circumstance, you're the image of old itself. There are four principal
good, and four principal evil, they are called the cardinal fours, and they
both are keepers of the gates, the gates of the two worlds. With the sign of
the cross, you'll get the four principal good, The Father, The Son ... and The
Holy spirit. Good is opposite of evil, light is the opposite of darkness, the
four principal evil is the opposite of the four principal good, so the son is
exalted above the father. Then, you'll have Satan which is the son on the
north, Belial the father on the south, Leviathan on the west and Lucifer on
the east. When you study the principal good, their no one on the west and
the Holy Spirit is the binding force between the father and the son. On the
principal evil, Lucifer is on the east, Satan and Lucifer are one and the same
person, so there's actually nobody on the east, Leviathan is the binding
force between Satan and Belial. You're neither good nor evil, and you're
both good and evil. You're on the west side of the principal good and on the
east side of the principal evil, you're the binding force between good and
evil, between heaven and hell forming the inverted pyramid of old. Your
soul will stitch back the sundered veil. Jesus gave his soul to sunder the veil
from up to bottom; he descended to hell, spent three perfect days before
resurrecting. Christians misinterpret this scenario, the sundered veil isn't
correctly the reunion of man and his creator, but the separation of the
cardinal fours, the veil is passage way between two worlds. Jesus didn't
travel to the underworld to retrieve the key of life or of heaven or of
whatever it is the church teaches these days, but he went to lock up the tail
side of the cardinal four. But you will unlock it, your soul will, all you need
do is become, accept immortality and rule. Check out Isaiah 14: 11-22,
many Christians think Isaiah was talking about devil, he was actually
talking about Jesus, Jesus was the one that said he'll ascend to heaven and
be with God, he's the one that said he is God. Ezekiel 28:16-17; was still
talking about Jesus, he was the one who got violent and fought in the
church, he was the one who was known as epitome of wisdom and beauty,
he was still the one who was laid and flogged before kings. Psalm 109:6;
who do we know that sits at the right hand, Jesus; who sat at the right hand;
Satan. We know the devil to be the giver of adversary and evil deeds, but
1king 5:4, made us know that God is the giver of adversary and evil. We
know Jesus to be son of God but Job 1:6 made us know that Satan is son of
God. We know Satan as the Lucifer, and we know Lucifer means morning

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sir, the bright morning star. Check out Revelation 22:16, even Revelation
2:24-28 made us know that there is more to the mystery of Satan than
already revealed. Satan is known as the serpent of old, Moses moulded
serpent in the wilderness, lifted it up on a stake and people were saved,
Jesus was lifted up on a stake and people were saved too. Bottom line is
Jesus and Satan are one and the same person. You'll have to change your
name son, your official name from now shall be Jesus Lucifer, which
literally mean, Jesus the bringer of light, or Jesus, the light bearer, or Jesus,
the bright morning star. Choose your destiny son, choose carefully and be
wise.... with this he left.

With anger that all the things he told me were true, actually seemed
to be till I found truth, I made up my mind to become, I went to the and
changed my name to Jesus Lucifer and I started my journey on crossing the
gates 31ist October, 2008, and crossed the four gates by 15th December,
2008, just a few minutes before my 18th birthday. I was supposed to
become on my birthday, I was supposed to seal the covenant with my
blood, the very first blood of my adulthood, after which I'll become, but he
gave me condition and he gave me rules. I hated conditions and I hated
rules. The eleven rules he gave me were;

1. Do not give opinions or advice unless you are asked.

2. Do not tell your troubles to others unless you are sure they want to hear
them.

3. When in another's lair, show him respect or else do not go there.

4. If a guest in your lair annoys you, treat him cruelly and without mercy.

5. Do not make sexual advances unless you are given the mating signal.

6. Do not take that which does not belong to you unless it is a burden to the
other person and he cries out to be relieved.

7. Always acknowledge the power of magic if you have employed it

successfully to obtain your desires, else you will lose all.

8. Do not complain about anything to which you need not subject yourself.

9. Do not harm little children or hurt the overly aged.

10. Do not kill non-human animal unless you're attacked or for your food.

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11. When walking in open territory, bother no one, if someone bothers you,
ask him to stop, if he does not stop, destroy him.

With these rules, you'll rule the earth, you'll get everything you want
and you shall dominate all things. But there is a problem kiddo, you have all
it takes to be a god but you have just one weakness, and that's your
emotions. The difference between gods and men is emotions, God lacked
emotions that's why he had the mind to gave up his only begotten son to
such cruel manner of death. You're too emotional, you can get angry very
easily you can kill a man over nothing, you can fall in love so easily that
you'll make stupid mistake over nothing. Your family is the only leverage
over you, they are you Achilles' heel, they are the only way to get at you,
they are your soft spot. Kill your family and you'll become a god, you'll lack
all the emotions and you'll become untouchable. That was the moment I
knew of a truth, 'THE DEVIL IS A LIAR'. All I did, all the risk I took, my soul I
sold, was all because of my family. To fight for my dad and to liberate my
siblings, to wipe tears off my mum's face, because the little girl is fast aging
due to much weeps per night. Of what use will I be in this world if I should
lose just even one of my family. Since I was little, I've being suffering of
autism; I find it very hard to relate freely with people, I had no peers and no
friends. Because of that I live like an outcast in my own home, my family
saw me weird and strange, they see me differently, but they didn't know
within me how much I love them all. I love them so much I could give my
life for them. I know my condition, I know I am very difficult to predict,
understand and deal with, yet they took the pain and still put up with me all
these years, that's why I worship them. To be sincere I'll worship virtually
anybody or even anything, that'll care about me no matter how eccentric I
was. My dad and I were more of cat and rat even till date, but that man has
suffered a lot and has given a lot on my account, because of that, I adore
him even though he doesn't know so. I did all and was willing to do more
for my family, and this monkey was standing right before my face telling
me to eliminate them all. I was too shocked and angry to utter a word, so he
continued; I know that maybe kind of difficult for you given how you feel
for them, but it's the only way son. I've never done this before, but I'll make
this easier for you, I know your dad gave you and is still giving you lots of
hard times, I know you hated him because he wants to control you, you
really have to earn your immortality son, kill just your dad to prove your
competence and I'll take care of the rest of your family for you. If this fool
was flesh and blood, I would've beaten him to death and gladly face the
penalty even if it's death sentence. Since I couldn't touch him, I didn't know
what to do to him, how to hurt him back as he had just done, from the little
light still remaining in my already darkened heart, I remembered the

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scripture, Matthew 4:10, I confidently told him to his face, 'Get lost old fool,
never meet me again'. Watch how you talk to me kid, this is 21st century; I
don't get running easily anymore, besides I get people like you lost. I'll
forgive you because I love you, and I'll give you time to chose your destiny,
it’s 12am already, If you don't kill your dad, you'll die on your 25th
birthday. If I have the spirit of Belial, that means I'm your father, and I
answer to no one, I have no master and nobody gives me orders, or
instructions, or condition, so I say get lost. I'll give you 7 long years to think
about it, happy birthday kid.

LESSON 23: The devil is not really particularly a liar, but he's
a monster. He'll creep into your life searching for your
innermost desire, twist it and tempt you with it. The two
gateways the devil can penetrate, tempt and get to you is
FRUSTRATION and DESPERATION. The devil is always lurking
around looking for a frustrated or desperate mind to use
especially if the hands of the mind are idle. The first
temptation of the devil ever recorded is in Genesis 3, he told
the woman the truth, if she ate the apple her eyes will open
and she'll have the knowledge of good and evil. The only thing
the devil does is he wouldn't tell you the whole truth, he
withdraws information, he wouldn't tell you in all detail what
you're about getting into till you get into it and got stuck, then
he'll control you. What he didn't tell Eve was that, if she ate the
fruit and has the knowledge of good and evil, she'll have free
will and wouldn't need God anymore. God will leave her alone
to choose her path. The devil didn't tempt Jesus till He was
hungry. Be mindful of what you're hungry of, you might
just get it.

THE WASTED YEARS

I lived the rest of my life lonely, lost and alone. Nobody knew what I
was going through; I was scared to make exploits because I believed I'll
soon die. Killing my dad wasn't an option; I'm never going to do it not even
for a billion dollars. The two options I had was, either I died and await my
fate in eternity, or someone up there might just have a change of heart and
look not on my sins but on my condition and have mercy on me. I lost
interest in furthering my education; I believed it was a waste of time and
resources. I was in dire need of serious help, but who do I talk to, I believed
a person gives advice or help based on past experience, I didn't think
anybody on earth had ever treaded this ugly path of mine. Maybe people

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had, but those that did, walked it to the last and became slaves of the devil.
Nobody had ever hung in between, well so I thought. People around me
knew I wasn't normal, my dad knew I needed help and tried his best to help
me. If there was a price to pay for my restoration and I knew my dad even
though having nothing, will pay double. But he didn't know my problem; I
became an alien even to my own self. Nobody saw my struggle, all they
complained about was the trouble, I was scared of even those that loved me
the most, kept running from those that I was supposed to be close, tried
running away even from my own shadow. My life was a waste, the only
friend I had was the mirror on the wall, my only source of joy was music
and alcohol, and the only job I did was the street. This time around, I had
lost my stance in the street, I didn't control the street any longer, I wasn't
as powerful as I used to, so I survived only on the crumbs from the street. I
bought stolen phones, laptops and motorbikes from the street at a very
cheap price, and resell them to make money. I lent money to frustrated
gamblers with interest that even I knew was really very exorbitant to make
money. I started mingling with rich women as old as or even older than my
mum, I had sex with them in exchange for money, gifts, comfort and
protection. I knew nobody loved me, well, my parents and siblings loves
me, but to me, that doesn't count because they were my family, so I
believed it was their duty to love me, after all I love them too, that's what
families do, they look out for one another. Aside my immediate family, I had
no friends, not a single one, I believed everything that revolved around me
was business, so all I had was just associates. My mamas kept saying they
loved me but I knew better, I knew it was the sex and their devilish desires,
the day I stopped giving them sex, the love dies. My reputation with mamas
grew so wide that women I didn't know will call me up to towns and states
I haven't been to for the weekend, the pay was always good, death was
already on my door step so I wasn't scared to die no more. I grew so bad
that I was having sex 4-5 times daily. I met a woman that taught me
internet fraud, and another that supplied me fake currencies and gun nuts
for sale. This is the summary of 5years of my life, my wasted years, I'm very
grateful to God that through all these years, I didn't serve time, I was never
arrested, not even tracked by cops for once. I had no direction, no purpose,
no future and no plans for my life. I spent the rest of my anticipating death
that I had no time to enjoy the filthy life I led. I was an angry and a bitter
boy, I was really pissed; I was pissed at God because if He hadn't let my dad
suffer so much, I wouldn't be in this shit. I was pissed at my family because
if it hadn't been for them, I would've been god on earth. I was pissed at
myself because if I wasn't so searchy, I wouldn't have being in this mess. I
was pissed at the devil because he can never give anybody anything
without conditions. I was pissed at everybody in the world because they're

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so blind and daft to see and understand the world we live in. I walked
around with a heavy heart, always having this funny feeling that if I could
just punch someone on the face, anybody at all, maybe I'd feel better. I got
myself into 3 different blood oaths, I took a blood oath when I was initiated
into cultism, I took a blood oath when I sold my soul to the devil and I took
a blood oath with one of my mamas that I'm never going to leave her or
reveal her secret till I die. My life was just like a leaf on the river, like the
boy on a swing, like a pendulum, I toss to and fro. It was like I take 10 steps
front and 10 steps back, like I was travelling round a circle only to always
find myself at the same spot. They say if you look up, you'll be delivered
because there's a God up there, if you look forward, you should be
delighted because your dreams lie before you. But when I look up, I see no
help, when I look forward, my vision is blurred, so I lived my life being just
a shadow of myself, with nowhere to go and nobody to talk to. Since I only
talk to myself, I became my own consultant, the only friend I had was the
mirror on the wall. One moment I'm bucks up and the next moment I'm all
broke. I lived my life always on the run, but how can I outrun my very own
self, how can I outrun the curse I brought upon myself. I knew at this
moment I should've turned to God, but I see it as hypocrisy, how can I run
knocking on the very same door I cursed and slammed. Plus, maybe I was
tied up with that same thing that happen to every youth, they are always
too ashamed to apologize for that very wrong they weren't ashamed to do. I
kept wishing my life was a dream, that maybe someday someone might just
be kind enough to shake me till he wakes me from this bad dream. Every
day I see myself grow, I grow into the ground, while my thoughts fall, they
fall into the sky.

THE SALVATION
My neighbour in Abuja, Themmy had being inviting to a church,
Foundation of Truth Assembly (FOTA), he kept saying if I didn't want to
come for God, at least I should come for the fun. I didn't ever in my life
imagine anything fun can come from a worship centre, even if it was held in
a stadium by Jay Z and Beyonce. In the village where I was bred, it is only
the poor that go to church, so I grew with the mentality that it is only those
that has lost in the race of life go to church so as to see where to hang their
hope till eternity call. I knew Themmy as the ladies man, so I thought his
own version of fun is beautiful girls around, that's what had being his only
desire, to be around ladies be it in school, church or anywhere. I had 999

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problems and girl is no way one of them, so I always declined his invitation
to go to church.

One Sunday, I was supposed to hang out with the boys, but was left
out even after I had taken my bathe and was ready to go. I was angry and
disappointed, so I decided to take myself out, to a place cool and cute. I was
on my way out when I met Themmy and his church members in the bus.
They hold their service in 3J's hotel, I figured two bottles of chilled beer in
the bar while they hold their service in the hall wasn't a bad idea, so I
tagged along. Themmy was so pleased he had a new invitee, not knowing I
had no intention of crossing the door of their service hall let alone seeing
the face of their pastor. As fate would have it, nature you know, has a way
of playing on us all, putting us in spots we thought was humiliating or
frustrating till things fall into place, I forgot my wallet at home. I couldn't
buy drinks in the bar, and I wasn't permitted to just sit and watch others
sip while I had none. Even if they permitted, my person wouldn't had let me
taken that shot, it's really very frustrating, will make you want to go beg for
a bottle. Having no other option, I was forced to go to the only place in the
hotel where I would be welcomed without questions, I entered the church.
In fairness to the truth, I was really wowed by their coordination, every
single thing, from the decoration, to the choir, to the ushers, to the
members and all, the only thing I could say was that there was love in the
hall. Everybody seemed so happy and relaxed like there was no one with a
single problem. My orientation about church, Pentecostal church, really
changed that instant. Back there in the village, most people you'll find in
church are poor people who had lost out in the race of life and is looking for
where to hang their hope, or young boys and girls who claim to be too
decent to mingle in hotels and social gatherings, and are not in school, so
they meet in church. The pastors are always poor and hungry looking, are
always desperate looking for some readymade dude to hang on. Back there,
the pastors always revere the members because he wouldn't want to lose
any of them, wouldn't be good for business. But here, I see rich dudes, big
boys and girls, who are so comfortable and independent, praising and
worshipping God. I see how no how filthy rich they were matter, revered
and respected their pastor like she was the holiest person on earth.

What really amazed me most was the personality I saw on the altar,
for the time in my whole life I saw a woman pastor a church, then I knew
why the church members were so happy. The first thing a first timer in the
church will notice is the love in the air, their pastor radiates so much love
that it fills the air during and after service, the love makes them more of a
family than a church, it makes them so united and one that you can't tell

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who's rich and who's not. She has a smile that'll make you forget your
sorrows for a while and a beauty that'll make a gay want to reconsider.
When she speak, it's as though she was singing, she has a voice that'll make
you give her all she ask, even more than what she asked, I believed she
must had been created on a Christmas morning when God was happy and
the angels were singing. MY first thought about her was, why should such a
beauty be such a waste, she should be out there with people like us having
fun, and I wished the I had met her in a club or somewhere more fun than
the church. I watched her preach, she doesn't just preach, she teaches,
based on the realities of life synced with the heavenly race. I wished I could
come back more often so I could see more of her, but I knew it wasn't just
possible, I had no business with God, or church, worse still a Pentecostal
church. If fate wants us to meet again, it should bring her to the club or
some where we could get acquainted over brews not gospel.

Towards the end of the service, first timers were called out, I refused
to go out, I was sitting longing seriously for one or two bottles of beer, still
wondering why this people here should be wasting their time and
resources over he that didn't exist or maybe on AWOL, when a hand tapped
me on the shoulder and beckoned on me to please step up. I was really so
worked up at the moment, I didn't mean to be here, I wasn't supposed to
here, I couldn't get a drink, I'm stuck here and my time is wasting, and I'm
now beckoned to walk up to the alter for the first timers ritual, I had a
serious urge to punch her on the face, but they say first impression matters,
wouldn't want to give the lady angel the impression I'm a tout, so I went to
the altar, did all it was they did and waited for the reception. We were
given a small card to fill in our contact details, when I filled in my name, I
didn't know one of the ministers as they were called was watching me,
maybe it was glaringly obvious I wasn't part of this gathering, or maybe he
just took special interest in me, he took the card angrily and started
scolding me, it costs us money to print this card, and we're here for serious
business not some sort of a joke, even if you don't regard us, don't you have
respect for the Almighty, why should you combine the name of our saviour
with that of the devil. I had washed my hands off everything that concerned
the devil, I was only waiting for the day he comes to take my life, but for
some reasons I couldn't tell, I still retained the name Jesus Lucifer just for
the fun of it, and that's what pissed minister mike off. I did not have any
strength to argue, I just showed him my Id card, he looked at it, looked at
me shocked, and the only thing he could say was, you must see pastor.

Sitting face to face with the woman I admired from afar, my whole
world stopped for a while, it seemed like I just forgot my name, like it was

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just the two of us and I was just too shy to speak. What's your name dear,
her voice, her smile, her humility, would make you never want to lie to her.
My name is Jesus Lucifer, but they call me Pokka, Pokka Messiah. I want the
name on your birth certificate. I gave her my name, my real name. You have
a very nice name dear, God's with us, why on earth will you throw that
away for a curse. I gave her the rundown of the meaning of the name. I'm a
pastor dear, I don't want to argue scripture with you, but I'll only teach you
one truth now if you'll let me. Before Jesus left, he gave his disciples the
power that whatever they tie on earth, will be tied in heaven and
whatsoever they loosen on earth, so will it be in heaven. Jesus is a name,
just an ordinary name that even some people bear it,; but the fact that
2.1billion Christians unanimously agree that the name is powerful and
makes miracle, so it is. That same 2.1billion Christians unanimously agree
that the name Lucifer is a curse, so it is. So my dear, I want you to do me a
favour, I want us to be friends. The favour actually sounded like I'm the one
being favoured, I didn't actually answer, I actually didn't know what to
answer. If we are going to be friends dear, I'll have to collect your Id card
and the affidavit. You'll have to stop bearing Jesus Lucifer, Pokka Messiah
or any other thing it is they call you. It was a simple fair deal to me, just that
I not being good in sustaining friendship didn't know how long or well this
one will go. Since we are now friends Emmanuel, tell me about yourself.
Mum, I don't think you'll really want to hear the truth. I want to hear it,
every single bit of it. She took me up to the gallery, where it was just the
two of us and she beckoned me to begin. I started from the genesis, I liked
her because she's a patient and a good listener, she listens even to blah.
After two hours of my miserable stories, I was already so soaked with my
own tears that my nose was running. She offered me a handkerchief, I
didn't know I was so broken, didn't know all these while all I needed was
just someone to talk to, a shoulder I could cry on. Two things I've just
discovered about now is, 1. You're a disturbed angry bitter boy. 2. You're
lonely and alone, you're so lonely that you built a wall around you, you
don't want to get out and you don't want to let anybody in. Now let me
clear your doubts; let me teach you before we continue.

1. Science is not the worst thing that happened to humanity, in fact science
is the best thing to ever happen to humanity aside salvation. I know science
has its flaws, that's because the inventors of science, humans, aren't 100%
efficient, we aren't perfect, we're not God. I know science has killed many
people, but they are just war casualties. Every good thing has its price, for
our salvation, Jesus paid the price, and it was death. For independence,
some people pay the price, for freedom, people still pay the price. I guess
you're conversant with the saying that, "Everything that has advantage has

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disadvantage", to know if something is good or evil, compare its advantage
to its disadvantage, if the advantage is up to or more than 60%, it's good.
You can't deny the advantages of science dear, look at your phone, you
boarded a vehicle down here, you cook your food, you use electricity, you
visit the hospital, your life revolves around science dear, you can't live
without it. You can't fight science using science, you're not as stupid as
those boko harams who claim science should be abolished yet they use
science. If you hated something, reject it absolutely, not use it while you
hate it. They fight science with science, they ride on cars, make calls, use
guns, which are all products of science, yet they claim they fight against it.
Embrace science dear and quit unleashing your bitterness to that
struggling baby.

2. As for Christianity, I'm so sorry it got infiltrated along the way by power
seeking mongers. Jesus knew some way or the other, Christianity will be
tempted and battled, but He knew it will prevail. That's why he told Peter
that the gate of hell shall not prevail, yes it will try, but won't prevail.
Somewhere along the line, Christianity got powerful, we all know that
power corrupts; it made her become both a religious and a political
institution. That's what brought about Pentecostal reformation, to strip
Christianity of its political powers and strengthen its religious countenance.
Everybody has done things in the past they are not very proud of, she was
just a little girl, misled, jeopardised and infiltrated. But now she's grown,
she's no longer a baby now she's a mother, she's learnt from her past, her
mistakes, and most importantly, she's grown strong now. Don't judge her
with her past, judge her with the present and the future, embrace her and
congratulate her because she's been trying so hard over the centuries to
correct the mistakes she's made. Have in mind dear, it wasn't even
Christianity that lost track, it was her adherents, her children, they were
toughened and darkened by the whips, swords and arrows that persecuted
them, they were bullied and persecuted, pushed so far into the wall, so they
lost it and became like their persecutors. They say the best way of defence
is counter attack, guess that's how she defended herself and got her
independence and freedom. Dear, learn how to forget the past and forge on
with the present so as to ascertain the future. Nobody mingles with the
dead, the past is dead and gone, leave and move on dear, it doesn't matter
how salvation was handed to us, what matters now is we're saved.

3. I don't know how you derived that philosophy of yours that fornication is
not a sin, one of your many problems; your major problem is you're too
intelligent and naturally controversial. Fornication is a sin dear, first of all
is your parents must had taught you against it, the society frowns at it, and

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you can't really proudly do it in the open. I don't want to start quoting
chapters and verses for you, but just know that fornication is total
disobedience to your parents and a sin against the society. Search yourself;
tell yourself the truth, would you like your daughters sleeping around,
because fornication is not a sin.

4. Dear, opposite of good is not evil, opposite of light is not darkness, as

opposite of heat isn't cold. You can measure good, you can measure light,
you can measure heat but cannot measure cold, darkness, or evil. Cold is
the absence of heat not the opposite of heat, darkness is the absence of light
not the opposite of light, evil is the absence of good and not the opposite of
good. We can only find evil in the heart of man when God has left the heart,
when the conscience is dead. My dear, the devil is not the opposite of God,
the devil can only come in when God is shut out, it can only operate in the
absence of God. If God and devil are same person, how can a kingdom stand
when they fight each other, how come the devil flee in the mention of the
name of Jesus Christ. I don't want to go into scriptures for you dear, I want
you to understand Christianity as it is in practical life experience and not
some sort of thing that can only be read and not felt. Nobody fights himself,
it's very obvious to all of us that light and darkness have being at war since
beginning. If God and devil is same person, they wouldn't be so in
loggerheads with each other.

5. Mary the mother of Jesus, despite the fact she's already being chosen to
be the vessel with which salvation was brought unto mankind, yet God had
to send an angel to seek her consent and free will, he asked her if she will
or will not, Mary replied, "Behold the handmaid of the Lord, be it done to
me according to thy will". Despite the fact Jesus' mission was already sealed
and concluded in heaven before he came down on earth, yet, at the 11th
hour, he was still shown what he was about to face, and his consent and
free will was sought, he still replied, "let it be done to me according to thy
will". Many people say devil made them do something but it's not true, God
and devil can never force you to do anything that's not your will, that's the
difference between humans and angels/demons. We have our own free will
but they don't. What I'm trying to tell you my dear child is, the devil can
never have powers over your soul unless you willingly submit to him. He
can't take your life, he can only try to frustrate and pressure you around till
you willingly give it up. Judging from our discussion so far dear, you seem
to me to be a very strong and brave young man, don't let him pressure you
give in your life or that of your family dear, learn from Job. My dear, you'll
turn 25 and nothing will happen to you, in fact, your life will start having
meaning from 25. Don't be afraid dear, the lord is with you, and I am and

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will always be by your side, I'll be with you all the way, just don't let me
down by losing faith.

The only way the devil can pressure you to give in your spirituality is
to frustrate your carnality dear, from your story so far, you aren't doing
anything now, so the big question is, what do you want to do and what can
you do. I don't want you to answer now dear, I want you to think it through
and give me a reply on Thursday. I was just too astonished too say a word,
so I just nodded. That means I'll be seeing you on Thursday then, I nodded
again, part of me didn't really want to come, but part of me was really
longing to. By the time we finished our discussion, it was really evening,
somewhere around 6pm, everybody has gone safe for her bodyguards, the
bus that conveyed me has left, she gave me 7,000naira for transport, patted
me on the back and said it is well. I went home that day feeling so alive,
feeling like a thousand tone weight of a load had being relieved off my head.
I was so happy and thankful to Themmy he made me come their Church.

The many things that made me adored this woman are, she didn't
preach to me or condemned me, she only showed me truth. She knew that
there was no kind of preaching I hadn't heard before, her own philosophy
about Christianity is so peculiar and unique. She believe Heaven is the
ultimate goal, and the final destination, but whilst you're here on earth, you
need a life. Her only aim is that her flock, every one of them, is as
comfortable as he can be here on earth whilst he race for heaven. She
started with me by giving me a life, helping me get a job, further my
education, and helping me in so many other ways she could. She believes in
the integrity of work, hard work, genuine hard work. She's a mother so she
understands, she doesn't look at you but looks into you, she hears even that
which your words couldn't express; she'll make you feel like you're the
most important person in the whole world. I hated Pentecostal church
before, because I believe the pastors are using Christianity to milk the poor
members, but the first time in my life I saw a pastor who is not even a
signatory to her own church account. I met a woman who will tell you the
truth and nothing but the truth no matter how hard it is, a woman who can
only do what is right and just. I met a woman of valour, a Beulah lady, a
woman that even if you don't read the bible but follow her lead, you'll make
heaven.

What saved me wasn't the preaching, I've heard that so many times
in my life, it wasn't the church or the money or the life, it was the love. For
the first time in my whole life I felt being loved; my parents and siblings
love me but I felt it's their responsibility, that they have no choice but must

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love me, after all I'm family and I love them too, that's what family do. All
my life apart from my immediate family, nobody could love me, that's why
as a teen, I couldn't get a girlfriend or a best friend. I couldn't even get a
friend at all, since I started using mobile phone, my contacts have never
exceeded 13. I was so lonely and alone that I have nobody to talk to, I
derived joy only on my own fantasy, it was like I was invisible because
nobody really cared about me till I found a woman that loved and cared
about me. Not like the women I've met with in the past who turned me into
a sex slave in the name of love. This woman accepted me for who I was,
cherish, care and love me so much that if I should cut her right hand, she'll
still reach over and hug me with the left. If I was given 10 lives to live, I
wouldn't be able to repay her, and the most important factor is that, she
expects nothing in return. The purest form of love and charity is giving to
that person that wouldn't be able to pay back in a lifetime. I was lost and
forgotten when she found me, was wallowing in the dark till she shone her
light, was only existing till she gave me a life, she taught me how to love, to
love myself to begin with, and to let others love me. She was my pastor, my
spiritual director, my mentor, my mother, my sister and my best friend. She
is the only female angel I know, she's all I have because she helped me
become all I ever want to be. The most important thing in my life is that she
led me to Jesus and is helping me maintain and sustain my relationship
with him. I can't say I'm a saint now, nobody is, but I'm trying hard and my
very best to be, that's all we strive. It's very easy now for me to stay on the
track because of all the love I see around me, love from my Fota family. I
don't misbehave again now because I've gotten an authority figure, the only
one person I answer to, the only one person in my whole life I know I'll
never disappoint. I just want the angels and every good people know that, I
found a goddess in Abuja, her name is Sharon Adefunke Kasali. There is a
God in FOTA, and He's truly alive, Jesus gathered his disciples with love,
Pastor Funke is sustaining her flock with love; genuine love, the love of
Christ, the love that cost nothing yet means everything, the love of a
mother. And you shall know the truth and the truth shall set you free, the
truth I know is that only love can set you free. Love set me free and I love
you too mum, even the heavens know that.

APPRECIATION
To God that formed me, you knew me from my mother's womb and gave
me all I needed in life to become successful, yet, I threw it right to your face,
I insulted, betrayed and denounced you. I'm too ashamed to say I'm sorry,
but all I beg you Lord is to look not on my sins but on the heart of your
humble servant, have mercy on me and give me the grace to rejoice with

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joyful hope for the 2nd coming of our lord Jesus Christ. The angel you sent
me told me I'm forgiven and I believe her, so I pray you give me another
chance to become your son again and love me back like you used to.

To my parents that gave me; I know I've not been a good son for many long
years, and for that I'm so sorry. I know I brought shame and disgrace to the
family, but I'm a changed boy now, I'm a better man. I pray that your
evergreen undying love for me keep burning till I overcome. I love you
more folks.

To my siblings that knew me; Felix, Pascal, Lawrence and my little angel
Cynthia, you are the only ones that knew me so well, because you've stayed
longer with me than with any other person in the world, you endured my
flaws and still showed me love. I just want to let you guys know I love you
too, more than you can ever imagine.

To the street that raised me; you bullied, frustrated and trampled me down,
you thought you were holding me down but you created a monster, a
monster you yourself became scared of that you couldn't stand. I'm coming
for you, but this time I'm coming with love, I'm coming with the truth, I'm
coming with a match stick to light up your way. I know many of you are in
the street because you believe it's the only way, the good news is, there is
always another way and I've found it. I won't force you but I'll lead you to it
if you want me to.

To the woman that made me; I'm all that I am just because you love me. For
all the times you stood by me, for the truth you made me see, for the joy
you brought into my life, for all my wrongs you made right, I just want to
say thank you so much. I can't repay you but the Almighty will; just want to
let you know I appreciate you so much.

To the family that love me; Foundation of Truth Assembly, my FOTA family,
I just want to say a very big thank you to you all, couldn't get this far
without your love. I promise I'll forever be a good ambassador till I die, will
never disappoint you.

To those that criticize me; I know you're wondering what business the
world have with the story my life, well, I thought same thing when I first
read Robinson Crusoe. After I was saved, I knew there are many others like
me or who would love to be like me. I penned this down to let every youth
know that there is no single gain in fish head. The problem with every
youth is that they all want to live someone else's life; they always look
outside instead of the inside. Many youths will abandon their life and want

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to become a musician just because one or two people made it through
music. It's same with other trending high jobs, now some youths even
aspire to become internet fraudsters, just because some criminals are
flexing off it. If you ever have in mind to join the illuminati, or money
rituals, better have a rethink. The devil can never give what he doesn't
have; he's not the giver of riches. He'll only manipulate your destiny and
complicate your life. No good can ever come from being diabolic, no good
thing can come ever come from the devil, the crumbs that come from him
always come with a price. Be warned, there is no gain in fish head.

I AM THE MESSENGER OF TRUTH AND I HAVE WRITTEN.

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