Realistic Versus Idealistic

“You are the most powerful army in the world; you are the future of this planet. You cannot, you

will not spend one more minute of your time looking in a mirror wishing you looked different.”

-Jamie Le Fay, Disillusion

From as far back as 2008, I can still recall begging my parents to let me stay up late on a

very specific Sunday every December to watch the one thing that I cared about enough to

override being drained for school the next day- the Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show. Started in

1995 by Stephanie Seymour, the show displayed stunning models sashaying down the runway of

the Plaza Hotel in New York City to show off the sexiest and newest designs from everybody’s

favorite lingerie monopoly, Victoria’s Secret. This show was not just a television premier to my

friends and I- it was an event. This world famous, one hour program has perpetually received so

many mixed responses of praise, hate, and pure attention over the past 24 years that it has

become a landmark in American culture. Eventually, though, the 13-year old version of myself

began to question why I wasn’t morphing into the exact figures of the models I had seen on my

t.v. as I got older. Around this age, most people tend to fall into one of the two opinions about the

fashion show. Those who hate it say that it's telling women that they need to look a certain way

in order to be desirable and wanted by men. Those who adore it say that it's more about the

stunning clothing and the influential performers that make them continue to watch. Personally, I

couldn't care less about the arguments of either side, as I only need to know one key piece of

information about the Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show to not let it control my attitude towards my

body- it is not realistic.

 To state matters plainly, nothing about these women’s figures is an attainable goal for

anyone working a nine-to-five that doesn’t include terrifyingly intense workouts and a

master-planned diet in its job description. Not only does the company require their models to

meet very specific guidelines, but they go through thousands of girls to find only a key few who

have them. To start, each model must have a 34-inch bust, 34-inch hips, and a 24-inch waist. Just

to audition to be in the show, a candidate has to be at least five feet, eight inches tall and cannot

exceed six feet (WOUB Digital). Knowing these numbers makes for a very interesting

comparison to the body measurements of the average woman in America. Statistically, they are

five feet, four inches tall, being more than six inches shorter than the median height for a VS

model. The average waist is measured at 35 inches, which is a shocking 11 inches larger around

than the qualifying waist of a model. The unreal bodies of these women are no doubt beautiful in

their own way, but isn't everyone’s? No one body type is set to be specifically envied and lusted

after, and even if some viewers cannot comprehend that, statistics can.

The type of viewers that I am referring to, of course, are young, impressionable girls who

are watching this show through the eyes of someone who is expecting to blossom into that

model. The real damage occurs when that metamorphosis doesn’t happen, as it doesn’t naturally

for so many women. Instead of embracing their bodies and loving themselves for who they are, a

shocking amount of girls turn to eating disorders such as anorexia and bulimia to help them reach

their goal of what in their minds is “the perfect body”. I was one of these girls. As a stereotypical

teenager, I was constantly stressed about three things: my grades, my image, and boys.

Eventually, I started to blame everything that didn't work out in these three categories on my

weight. It didn’t make sense to me that all of my friends were getting their first kisses by the first
year of high school and I was still in my awkward phase. According to my logic, it wasn’t

happening to me because I was over 150 pounds. Soon enough, however, it wasn’t just guys. I

started to resent my friends and family for “failing” me because they had never scolded me for

eating a slice of pizza. I was no longer focused on the fact that they had taught me how to be a

compassionate person and carry ethical values; those things aren’t visible in a 5 by 3 piece of

glass.

What started out with cutting a few hundred calories snowballed into eating less than 600

calories per day and working out instead of sleeping. The time period after I worked out was the

happiest I was all day, and it gave me enough stamina to keep going. As for food, iced coffee had

basically turned into my main source for nutrition, but my favorite use for it was curbing my

appetite for hours on end. After a while, my efforts began to pay off- I was losing 3 pounds per

week, every week, for months. This paired with the overwhelming support of my friends and

strangers on social media, the ever-increasing attention I was finally getting from the boys I

thought were cute, and the congratulations from my family, kept me going. However, none of my

Instagram followers were there to see me break down because I hadn’t dropped two pounds in

two days. The hysteria that I spiraled into when I felt full for once or over-ate was something that

I can only compare to the feeling of absolutely failing something that meant everything to you. It

was not just a slip to me, and I would convince myself that I would not be able to come back

from it. The repercussions of these slip-ups were not pretty, including starving myself for

extended periods of time as punishment or making myself cancel social plans. When I examine

what went wrong, where my self-love turned to self-hate, it all circled back to blind approval

from people that I probably wouldn’t even recognize in person. For myself, along with thousands
of girls around the world, social media was where the idea of losing “just a couple of pounds”

turned into a full-blown eating disorder.

The feedback that one can receive on social media from a single image is astounding- so

much so that it can turn healthy, happy, girls into malnourished, diminishing skeletons. The

promise of attention and recognition is the very thing that fuels so many teenagers to strive for

the perfect physical appearance that they “need” to succeed. I became aware of the severity of

eating disorders through my experiences; however, as I started to research them, I realized their

pervasiveness within society. According to the ANAD, over 30 million people just in the United

States alone will suffer from an eating disorder in their lifetime. By reaching out to one friend

and sharing what happened to me, I found what seemed like an entire world of girls suffering

from the same circumstances. As I met more and more people who were not public about their

situations because of shame and guilt, I became increasingly eager to make a difference in this

global issue.

Disorders such as Anorexia and Bulimia Nervosa are often looked at as taboo to discuss

in public, but through awareness, they can be made known across the country. While social

media may be the beginning of many girls’ issues in this field, it can also be the cure. By

promoting healthy behaviors and sharing personal encounters with eating disorders, outlets such

as Twitter and Instagram turn into news sources, each containing millions of members per app.

What started out as something I felt ashamed and scared about has turned into a topic that I strive

to make a part of my efforts in my community every day. In sharing my progress of returning to

a healthy state with my friends and followers, I am able to feel the support of a community in a

healthy way as opposed to the destructive one in my past. Not only has this awareness spread
online, but in my own school as well through open conversations and the promotion of positive

eating behaviors. Although I know I am not the direct cause of this change, I am proud to think

that I made a significant contribution in sharing my story and encouraging others to share theirs.

In saying all of this, the point of my story is not to shame the Victoria’s Secret Fashion

Show for having beautiful models or to put out a warning to anyone watching it, the point is

simply to share an experience that changed me as a person. While having it be brought on by a

lingerie brand may not be the most orthodox way to have a personal revelation, it is the truth. But

although the goal of my story is not to tear the show apart, it is for many other people- and its

been working. 3.3 million viewers watched the show that recently aired on Sunday, December

1st (The Daily Caller), which must have been pretty upsetting for the executives at Victoria’s

Secret, with views dropping 40% when compared to last year’s. Not only has this number

decreased just recently, but it has dropped by 6.41 million in total when putting this year’s show

side by side with 2013’s, which had a whopping 9.71 million viewers (WOUB Digital). Society

is changing, and people’s descriptions and expectations of beauty are evolving. “Acceptance” is

the new “exclusive”, and the company is beginning to notice. It was not until I recovered from

the eating disorders that I came upon this belief that these women’s figures are not idealistic or

realistic, and although it seems backward, watching the show only reinforces that for me now.

Having to go through what I did gave me a new perspective on myself and my body, and as a

whole, made me appreciate myself more than I ever could have without it.