Justine L.

Palasigue BSAR 1B
Module 2 Ethics and Barriers in Intercultural Communication

Activity 2: Torn Between Two Cultures

Directions: Read the situation and answer the questions after it.

In the novel “The Joy Luck Club” by Amy Tan, four Chinese women immigrated to
the United States of America, married Chinese men, and had daughters. Although these
women lived in the US, they still maintained their Chinese customs and traditions, giving
priority to family and relationship than on individuality. Their daughters who were raised
and educated in American culture had to embrace both cultures.

One night, one of the daughters brought her fiancé, an American, to introduce to
her parents. She wanted to tell her parents after dinner that she would like to marry and
would be asking for their permission. However, after dinner, she was not able to tell her
parents because her fiancé committed so many mistakes in the dining table. First, her
fiancé drank in one gulp the wine which should be sipped slowly. Second, her fiancé
loaded his plate with food when in fact he should get just a tiny portion and when the rest
of the family had taken their shares, that’s the time that he could get some more. Third,
when offered the mother’s specialty, he sprinkled it with more black pepper, insulting his
fiancee’s mother.

The American fiancé believed that there is no need for them to get the permission
of the parents because they are already adults. He could not understand why his fiancée
need to ask the permission of her parents to marry.

Questions:

1. What is the problem of the lovers? (5 points)

The lover’s problem, based on the given situation, is that they have different
cultures, and her fiancé is unaware of these distinctions. Because people from different
cultures have different mindsets, values, and beliefs, communication becomes difficult
especially when they don’t know each other’s culture and don’t communicate ethically.

2. What communication barrier is shown in this scenario? (5 points)

Based on LaRay M. Barna’s Six Barriers to Intercultural Communication, the

communication barrier shown in this situation is assuming similarity instead of difference.
It refers to the assumption that your culture is similar to other culture. Because her fiancé
is unfamiliar with their Chinese customs and traditions, he made mistakes in the dining
table. Furthermore, he couldn’t understand why his fiancée needed to get her parents’
permission to marry because he believes that they are already adults and don’t need their
parents’ consent cultures because in their culture or in American culture, an individual
can marry without parental consent at the age of 18. We can deduce from this that he
simply expects cultural similarities rather than differences.

3. If you were the Chinese daughter, what would you do? (5 points)

If I were the Chinese daughter, I would educate my fiancé’s about my own culture
and the fact that we have cultural differences. I’ll explain and demonstrate our customs
and traditions to him. I know it will be difficult for him to accept it right away, but I’ll do my
best to get him to acknowledge it. I will also learn and respect his culture.

4. If you were the American fiancé, what would you do? (5 points)

If I were the American fiancé, I would conduct my own study to learn about my
fiancee’s culture and embrace our cultural differences since I know that learning about
other people’s culture can help me acquire a better understanding of cultural diversity. I’ll
be more accepting of her culture and recognize that we have distinct customs and
traditions, which I’ll respect.

5. What ethical intercultural communication approach would you apply in this situation?
Why? (5 points)

The golden consequence (utilitarianism) in the universalist approach is the

intercultural communication I would apply in this situation. This approach aims to
maximize the good while minimizing the bad for the most people. Because they are in a
Chinese household in this scenario, the American fiancé must know whether his acts
demonstrate respect for his fiancée and her family’s culture and whether they are ethically
right or wrong. This golden consequence emphasizes the implication of one’s actions,
and teaches us how to act for the greatest good for the greatest number of people.