III.

Analysis:
3.1. Formality style: Informal
3.2. Text style: Discussion
3.3. Cultural equivalence:
Non-apologizers: người không xin lỗi
The “Dear Guy” column: mục “Guy thân mến”
Emotional discomfort: sự khó chịu về mặt cảm xúc
Deadline: kì hạn
Feelings of shame: cảm giác xấu hổ
Feelings of low self-worth: cảm giác tự ti
Fragile egos: cái tôi mong manh
Defense mechanisms: các cơ chế phòng vệ
Fragility-driven defensiveness: hành động phòng vệ xuất phát từ sự yếu ớt
Psychological strength: sức mạnh tâm lí
3.4. Functional equivalence:
Readers: độc giả
Psychology: mặt tâm lí
Apology: lời xin lỗi
Colleague: đồng nghiệp
Coworker: đồng nghiệp
Non-apologizers: người không xin lỗi
Defense mechanisms: các cơ chế phòng vệ
Deadline: kì hạn
Low self-worth: tự ti
Egos: cái tôi
3.5. Grammatical equivalence:

 Tense:
Present Simple:
We all know people who just can’t apologize — well, here’s why
Even when they’re clearly in the wrong.
Are they just stubborn? Or is there something in their psychology that
stops them from being able to take responsibility for their actions and
simply say they’re sorry?
To be clear, even the most conscientious among us occasionally fails
to apologize.
When this happens, it’s usually for one of two reasons: (1) We don’t
care enough about the other person or the relationship to take on the
emotional discomfort of owning our mistake and apologizing for it; or
(2) We believe our apology won’t matter.

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People who can’t apologize appear to be tough individuals who refuse
to back down.
But they don’t do this because they’re strong — it’s because they’re
weak.
What makes them incapable of apologizing even when they’re
obviously in the wrong?
For these people, admitting wrongdoing and offering an apology is too
psychologically threatening.
Offering an apology implies that they’ve harmed another person in
some way, which can elicit feelings of shame.
People who cannot apologize often have such deep feelings of low
self-worth that their fragile egos cannot absorb the blow of admitting
they were wrong.
So their defense mechanisms kick in — at times, unconsciously — and
they may externalize any blame and even dispute basic facts to ward
off the threat of having to lower themselves by offering an apology.
When they double down on their wrongness by blaming
circumstances, denying the facts, or attacking the other person or
people involved.
Unfortunately, many of us mistakenly interpret these people’s fragility-
driven defensiveness as a sign of psychological strength.
That’s because outwardly they appear to be tough individuals who
refuse to back down.
But they don’t do this because they’re strong — it’s because they’re
weak.
Present Perfect:
Since I started writing the “Dear Guy” column, I’ve received many
letters from readers asking why some people in their lives just seem
unable to apologize — even when they’re clearly in the wrong.
But what about the people who can never admit they’ve misstepped,
no matter the circumstance?
Offering an apology implies that they’ve harmed another person in
some way, which can elicit feelings of shame.
Modal Verb:
But what about the people who can never admit they’ve misstepped,
no matter the circumstance?
Non-apologizers can make themselves feel empowered rather than
diminished.
Offering an apology implies that they’ve harmed another person in
some way, which can elicit feelings of shame.
If Clause:
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 If you think the coworker already holds a grudge against you for an
earlier incident, you may skip apologizing since you feel it really won’t
help your relationship with them.
3.6. Situation equivalence:

Letters in the “Dear Guy” column (những lá thư trong mục “Guy thân
mến”).

3.7. Semantic equivalences:

 Noun:
Column (mục), letters ( lá thư), readers (đọc giả), people (những
người), lives ( cuộc sống), psychology (tâm lí), responsibility (trách
nhiệm), actions (hành động), reasons (lí do), person (đối tượng),
relationship (mối quan hệ), mistake (sai phạm), apology (lời xin lỗi),
colleague (đồng nghiệp), deadline (hạn chót), coworker (đồng
nghiệp), grudge (sự thù hằn), incident (sự cố), individuals (cá
nhân), circumstance (trường hợp), wrongdoing (sai phạm), feelings
(cảm giác), shame (sự xấu hổ), self-worth (tự ti), ego (cái tôi),
defense (sự phòng vệ), mechanisms (cơ chế), blame (sự đổ lỗi),
facts (sự thật), threat (nguy cơ), wrongness (sự sai lầm), non-
apologizers (người không xin lỗi), defensiveness (hành động phòng
vệ), strength (sức mạnh).
 Adjective:
Unable (không có khả năng), stubborn (cố chấp), able (có thể),
clear (rõ), conscientious (tận tâm), emotional (thuộc về cảm xúc),
tight (sát nút), tough (cứng rắn), strong (mạnh mẽ), weak (yếu
đuối), incapable (không thể), threatening (đe dọa), deep (sâu sắc),
fragile (mỏng manh), basic (cơ bản), empowered (quyền lực),
diminished (suy yếu), fragility-driven (xuất phát từ sự yếu ớt),
psychological (thuộc về tâm lí).
 Verb:
started (bắt đầu), writing (viết), have recieved (nhận), asking (thắc
mắc), seem (dường như), apologize (xin lỗi), stops (ngăn chặn),
take responsibility for ( chịu trách nhiệm ), say (nói), fail( thất bại),
happens (xảy ra), care (quan tâm), take on( gánh chịu), owning (hối
lỗi), apologizing (xin lỗi), believe (tin), matter (có tác dụng),
snapped at (cáu gắt), interrupted (chen vào), were racing (chạy
đua), meet (hoàn tất), think ( nghĩ), hold a grudge against (có thù
hằn), skip(bỏ qua), help (giúp), appear (tỏ ra), refuse (không chịu),
back down (nhượng bộ), do (làm), admit (thừa nhận) , have
misstepped (đã sai lầm), makes (khiến), offering (đưa ra), implies

5
 (ngụ ý), have harmed (làm tổn thương), elicit (khơi gợi), have (có),
absorb (tiếp thu), kick in (trổi dậy), externalize (đổ lỗi), dispute (lý
sự),  ward off (tránh khỏi), lower (hạ mình), double down on (tiếp
tục kiên quyết), blaming (đổ lỗi ), denying (phủ nhận), attacking (tấn
công), make (khiến), feel (cảm thấy), interpret (hiểu nhầm).
 Adverb:
Clearly (rõ ràng), simply (đơn giản), occasionally ( đôi lúc), usually
(thường), earlier (lúc trước), really (thật sự), obviously (rõ ràng),
psychologically (về mặt tâm lí), unconsciously (một cách vô thức),
mistakenly (nhầm), outwardly (về bề ngoài).
 Transformation:
For example, let’s say you snapped at a colleague who interrupted
you while you were racing to meet a tight deadline.
(Thí dụ, hãy cho rằng bạn đã cáu gắt với một đồng nghiệp bởi vì
họ cứ chen vào trong lúc bạn đang chạy đua để hoàn tất công
việc đúng kì hạn)
For these people, admitting wrongdoing and offering an apology is
too psychologically threatening. Offering an apology implies that
they’ve harmed another person in some way, which can elicit
feelings of shame.
(Đối với những người này, việc thừa nhận sai phạm và nói lời xin
lỗi là một mối đe dọa về mặt tâm lý. Việc nói lời xin lỗi ngụ ý rằng
họ đã làm tổn thương người khác theo một cách nào đó và điều
này có thể khơi gợi cảm giác xấu hổ.)
People who cannot apologize often have such deep feelings of
low self-worth that their fragile egos cannot absorb the blow of
admitting they were wrong.
(Những người không thể xin lỗi thường có cảm giác tự ti sâu
sắc đến nổi cái tôi mong manh của họ không thể tiếp thu được
việc thừa nhận mình sai.)
So their defense mechanisms kick in — at times, unconsciously —
and they may externalize any blame and even dispute basic
facts to ward off the threat of having to lower themselves by
offering an apology.
(Thế nên, đôi khi cơ chế phòng vệ của họ trổi dậy một cách vô
thức và họ có thể sẽ đổ lỗi cho các nguyên nhân khách quan
và thậm chí lý sự về những sự thật cơ bản để tránh khỏi nguy
cơ phải hạ mình thông qua việc đưa ra lời xin lỗi.)
 Expressions:
Take responsibility for (chịu trách nhiệm), take on (gánh chịu), snap
at (cáu gắt), hold a grudge against ( thù hằn), back down (nhượng
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 bộ), kich in (trổi dậy), ward off (tránh khỏi), double down on (kiên
quyết).
3.8. Metaphors:
 Dead metaphors:
Receive (nhận), say (nói), deadline (hạn chót), care (quan tâm),
skip (bỏ qua ), feel (cảm thấy), do (làm), have (có), make (khiến).
 Cliche metaphors:
Hold a grudge against (thù hằn).
 Stock or standard metaphors:
 Adapted metapors:
 Recent metaphors:
Deadline (kì hạn), snap at somebody (cáu gắt với ai đó).
 Original metaphors: