Stop pandering to other people’s definition of ‘success’

36 upvotes | 14 February, 2021 | by Trp2727272

Most people are chasing ‘success’ or a definition of it that they don’t even believe in themselves.
Getting rich.
I’m looking at you - guy who watches masturbatory motivation porn on YouTube about being a ‘warrior’,
wearing a $10,000 suit and a Rolex in the city looking like every other corporate drone working 100 hour
weeks for a lifeless soul sucking company trying to ‘make it’ as a ‘successful man’.
Or the guy who is obsessed with stocks and shares because he think it will make him ‘rich’ when the
reality is it’s just socially accepted gambling with way worse odds.
Or the guy who wants to start a business and be an entrepreneur, not because he has a great idea and
wants to pursue it, but because he likes the idea of being seen as a successful entrepreneur by other
people, it seems ‘cool’. Right?
Take a step back and think, do you really care?
Or are you just doing it to pander to the ‘invisible audience’ of your past that you are trying to impress?
So you can drive back to your high school reunion in a lambo and flex on all your past classmates?
So you can be an example of objective ‘success’ to everyone you know?
These people do not care about you. They don’t give a fuck. They might think ‘wow he made a a lot of
money’ for one second and they will then proceed to forget about you, forever.
Read it again.
The invisible audience you’re pandering to does. not. give. a. fuck. about. you.
Even if they did, why do you care anyway? Why are you putting in countless hours of your time every
single day to try and impress people who won’t even take 2 seconds out of their day to think about you.
You are irrelevant to them.
Money is seen as the default parameter for ‘success’ these days, I would know. I’m an economics major,
and 99% of my class took the course because they wanted to earn a lot of money, including myself at the
time, lol.
Being successful is living your life how YOU want to live it. Not wasting your life trying to impress
people who don’t even care about you. You can’t take money to the grave. Live your life whilst you’re
young and stop wasting time desperately trying to pander to others’ definition of ‘success’ to impress
people you don’t even know and most the time don’t even like or respect.
What most people consider ‘successful’ in this life simply doesn’t motivate me, and many others. I don’t
care about fancy cars, big houses, or money, at all. I couldn’t care less. As long as I have freedom and
security.
Money should be seen as a gateway to freedom, if you’re motivated by money because you want to retire
early and go travel the world, or you want sufficient financial security so that you can leave a shitty job
whenever you feel like it rather than being trapped in a corporate rat race. This post doesn’t apply.
If having lots of money and being rich truly is your motivation. That’s totally fine. Everyone needs
something that gets them going. But question yourself, do you want money for YOU? Or are you doing it
to impress other people and be seen as ‘successful’? If you’ve read this post and it truly doesn’t apply to
you, then kudos.

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What motivates me personally is getting with tonnes of different women, looking my absolute best, being
my absolute strongest in the gym, thriving in social interaction, etc. This is my definition of success as a
man. But that’s just me.
If I judged YOU off MY definition of success, as a man, a lot of you probably wouldn’t like it. Because
it’s perhaps not what motivates you, or it’s something you’re not good at, or perhaps you’ve invested so
much time into another definition of ‘success’ you’ll be offended by the idea that ^you’re not actually a
successful man in another person’s brain*. Again, this would show you’re motivated by other people’s
definitions of success rather than your own. You’re living in other people’s frame. People you don’t even
know. Think about that for a second.
I personally don’t look at rich men as an example of success, more like a man who has wasted their
youth.

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DareyFathom • 23 points • 14 February, 2021 01:03 PM

Or the guy who is obsessed with stocks and shares because he think it will make him ‘rich’ when the reality
is it’s just socially accepted gambling with way worse odds.

If you're an econ major you should know that isn't true. Particularly in our current monetary stimulus times. I do
agree that the push to be an entrepreneur is not for everyone and failure rates on that are quite high. Motivations
change over time. The safest bet for enjoying your life might not involve financial security, but it almost
guarantees financial stability at the very least.

Inside-Party • 9 points • 14 February, 2021 06:17 PM*

Yeah I scrolled down to say this - on average, a portfolio of >20 stocks held for over 5 years has a very high
percentage chance of being profitable. I don’t remember the exact number but it’s above 90% iirc- google it.
And I work for big companies and stockpile money not because I gaf about showing off - I want to buy a
boat and a house in paradise. And maybe a nicer motorcycle. And potentially a used airplane. And superb
escorts now and then.
I grew up working all through high school to help the family with bills, and eating ramen noodles for weeks
at a time. I'm going to live the last part of my life in outright, gross, materialistic excess, and hopefully die at
90 while fucking a 19 year old on my yacht.

ibwriting • 3 points • 14 February, 2021 06:42 PM

crazy and on point. Another good one was to trade on people's emotions.
That has made me have returns I prefer not to talk about publicly.

jm51 • 10 points • 14 February, 2021 04:40 PM

The most successful guy I ever met was an Australian ski bum. He would work and save until he had enough for
a long skiing trip. Then quit and go skiing.
A plain speaking no nonsense guy that could get things done, he got sucked into the corporate world. Within a
few years became a trouble shooter for a Japanese multi national.
While flying to a new assignment, he looked down on snow covered mountains and thought to himself: 'What
the fuck am I doing, I'm a ski bum.'
He worked out his notice and went skiing.

BlondeHornyElf • 5 points • 14 February, 2021 02:24 PM

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the only people i have these kinds of feelings for is my parents, they think i'm nuts.. in general i don't give a fuck
what anyone else thinks about anything tbh

ForeverKarlMalone • 3 points • 14 February, 2021 03:34 PM

You do realize it’s possible to do what you love AND make good money at the same time right?
The two are not mutually exclusive.
In fact, they often go hand in hand because not too many people have the willpower to keep grinding away at
something they don’t love with all their heart, which is necessary for high levels of success in a competitive
market

Trp2727272 • 0 points • 14 February, 2021 03:44 PM

I agree.
Re-read my 4th paragraph.

ForeverKarlMalone • 2 points • 14 February, 2021 03:49 PM

Ah yes I see, my bad, you’re shitting on the people who just want to get rich for approval from society

premiumperfmance • 3 points • 14 February, 2021 03:38 PM

Money can’t buy happiness, but it can buy a Cessna citation. And a citation, my friend, is freedom.
Also jetskis, nobody’s ever been sad on a jetski

Datanami • 3 points • 14 February, 2021 05:41 PM

Well I agree on most of what you said but your definition of success is lame af. That's not success, that's just
chasing the high of temporary pleasures and will lead you nowhere. But you'll understand that on your own in a
few years of living such a "successful life"

urbanfoh • 5 points • 14 February, 2021 05:53 PM

"I press my red dopamine button all day like a laboratory rat and I am super independent and alpha"
OP, probably

Trp2727272 • 0 points • 14 February, 2021 06:22 PM

your definition of success is lame af

That’s fair enough. My definition of success should be irrelevant to you.

In my opinion, chasing money during your youth is ‘lame af’.
My opinion shouldn’t matter to you and your opinion doesn’t matter to me.
Do what you want to do.

Datanami • 2 points • 14 February, 2021 06:24 PM

I didn't say it was better, but a man should aim higher. You don't have a mission.

Trp2727272 • 1 point • 14 February, 2021 06:26 PM

What’s an example of a ‘mission’ in this context?

I_love_emoji • 9 points • 14 February, 2021 03:26 PM

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you're wasting your youth too. you don't contribute to society. you're just a fuck boy for women to use. you must
have had a bad relationship with your mother which resulted in you having this dysfunctional lifestyle. anyway,
good luck.

youzabish • 2 points • 14 February, 2021 05:28 PM

Lmao wtf is wrong with you.

Grandazer • 2 points • 14 February, 2021 05:43 PM

you're just a fuck boy for women to use

Damn I'd love to have that problem haha

Thorusss • 1 point • 14 February, 2021 05:57 PM

I have not been that active in recent years in this sub, but TheRedPill used to be about how to really get to
fuck women?!?

Trp2727272 • -1 points • 14 February, 2021 03:35 PM

you’re wasting your youth too

How? I’m happy.

you don’t contribute to society

Do you deem this as important? I don’t.

You’re just a fuck boy for women to use

Are they using me or am i using them? I’d argue neither. It’s a pretty mutual agreement.

You must have a bad relationship with your mother

Not at all.

you having this dysfunctional lifestyle

What’s dysfunctional about it?

Gabriel-DS • 2 points • 14 February, 2021 04:44 PM

Money is one of the most important thing in life. I don’t understand you at all.
If you don’t have money, you’re just a slave. You will have to trade your time all your life to just survive.
Slavery is real. And you need a shit ton of money to claim back your life. And actually own it.

Trp2727272 • 2 points • 14 February, 2021 04:52 PM

I agree with your second paragraph.

This isn’t me shitting on the money motivated. It’s the reasons certain people chase money/ artificial success.
I suggest you re-read and truly try to understand what I’m saying, particularly my 6th to last paragraph
paraphrases exactly what you’re saying.

yungassed • 2 points • 14 February, 2021 06:32 PM

Sounds like you’ve never been really poor. And I’m not talking about poor in a western country standards. In a
way, the ability to be a bum is one of the most privileged things you can do because of the protections given to

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you by your country.
As someone that immigrated to the US from a war torn middle eastern country, you learn all to well don’t make
yourself someone important, you are just allowing yourself to become a victim at a future date. Money is just the
international signal for this.
I’m trying to rebuild generation wealth that has been stolen from stolen from me and my family. Fuck all that
noise of you don’t have to be successful.

Trp2727272 • 1 point • 14 February, 2021 06:37 PM

That’s your motivation, and that’s fine.

yungassed • 2 points • 14 February, 2021 06:55 PM

You’re completely missing my point. There’s a lot of things to pick away at but at the end of the day, I
want you to think about why you even felt the need to make this point. You listed all the other domains
where you can view yourself as successful and that’s perfectly fine, but they aren’t mutually exclusive
from getting rich. Look at Arnold Schwarzenegger. It just sounds like you’re setting yourself mentally to
accept that you might not become rich and convincing yourself that’s okay because you never wanted it
in the first place. You’re setting yourself with a losers mentality without even knowing it.
You are assuming every don’t believe in the concept of success as getting rich and you’re probably only
speaking for a minority rather than a majority. Wait until you or a family member get sick or old and you
will see how much money really matter.

Trp2727272 • 1 point • 14 February, 2021 07:17 PM

Just because Arnold did something that doesn’t mean everyone else on the planet wants to do what
Arnold did.
You’re actually right though, I don’t know it. I don’t know how not wanting to be rich is a ‘losers
mentality’. Who told you that?
You’re judging me by your standards.
If I judged other people by my standards, I’d think 99% of this planet are ‘losers’. I don’t.

yungassed • 2 points • 14 February, 2021 07:35 PM

Right, I am judging you by my standards just as everyone else is. And you are right, you
shouldn’t care because I’m just rando on the internet. But you should care about the opinion of
those around (assuming you respect them) because you don’t exist in a vacuum. And that’s not to
say you live solely for them, you obviously have to go against the grain and take chances in life
when others don’t see the same vision. But that’s not you shouldn’t be aware of what others think
and take in consideration where you stand.
I’m not judging by the outcome, I’m judging by the how hard they tried. Most people realistically
don’t make it, and that’s okay but if you didn’t even try to find out, that’s a loser to me.
At the end of the day, you’re gonna believe what you want regardless of what I say and it’s a
lesson you’ll probably end up learning the hard way. I sincerely hope you don’t but if you don’t,
you can’t say no one warned you along the way. Best of luck with it all.

UnleashTheWolf • 2 points • 14 February, 2021 06:34 PM*

You CAN gamble in the stock market, but that doesn't make all investments worse than gambling.

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Sure, if you see it as a get rich quick scheme you're an idiot, but at the same time, if you're NOT long term
investing you're also pretty stupid.
As for the rest, why would you not want to make more money? The more money you have, the more freedom
you have. You can still make progress in the gym, with women and with hobbies, while also making progress
with money. Why wouldn't you want progress in everything?

Trp2727272 • 1 point • 14 February, 2021 06:41 PM*

I have money invested in assets. I’m not arguing against long term investments. They’re just fine.
However, I also wouldn’t call someone an idiot for not investing. That’s pure FOMO bullshit. You do not
NEED to invest in the market. At all.
I think you misunderstood the general point. My point is to stop living your life based on other people’s
definitions of success. Stop pandering to the invisible audience, stop trying to impress people that don’t even
think about you for a second a month. People pursue money just so others’ see them as a ‘success’.
Having money doesn’t necessarily make you a success. Being happy however? I’d say it does.

pras • 2 points • 14 February, 2021 07:41 PM

https://www.instagram.com/p/CLCUnvjjBQ0/?igshid=o072px81def6

Famous-Ad8259 • 3 points • 14 February, 2021 05:05 PM

Haha calling stocks gambling with worse odds, yeah maybe if your a freakin idiot. Sounds like your just jealous
of those who have the skills to pay the bills since you haven’t taken advantage of trading, that or you were just
shit and lost a bunch of money and never picked it up again.

BingoBango5 • 1 point • 14 February, 2021 05:14 PM

Not sure this is fair to say. He probably just doesn't get it and that's okay.

Trp2727272 • 0 points • 14 February, 2021 05:12 PM

Because that’s exactly what it is. Sounds like you’re very emotional. Not a good trait of a trader.
I’ve actually doubled my money investing.
Trading is gambling. Every good trader knows that. The good traders (there’s not many of them) know how
to spin the odds in their favour somewhat.
It’s your* btw. Just thought that was ironic considering the following line.
Also, yes I am a ‘freakin idiot’ how did you know?

Famous-Ad8259 • 1 point • 14 February, 2021 05:21 PM

I think you forgot the most important muscle you need to workout, your brain. To you its gambling
because you prob haven’t been successful, but you absolutely can make a killing trading if you
understand what your doing. Person A decides to throw their money at something they have a small grasp
on and they either win or lose. Person B can research and use his years of experience to know a good
trade from a shit one. All it takes is learning my friend.

Trp2727272 • 1 point • 14 February, 2021 05:22 PM

I mean I don’t disagree with that. But people get into trading with limited knowledge thinking it’s a
get rich quick scheme, it’s most certainly not. It’s gambling with varying odds based on your
knowledge.

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ceswk • 2 points • 14 February, 2021 06:02 PM

The biggest challenge for a man is to be helpful/contribute to society . That is what makes you a strong man.
That is what makes you a champion, a legend.
If you go on about your sorry little life, going to the gym and fucking a girl here and there, you're mediocre.
And you will never get the real good girls anyway because they choose champions, self sacrificing men,warriors,
those who make a change, leaders, not egoistical self-centered muscleheads.

LegitimateDentist164 • 2 points • 14 February, 2021 06:45 PM

What is a specific example of contributing to society? How are you doing that?

ReviraeVolta1111 • 1 point • 14 February, 2021 05:20 PM

Other than my dream: psytrance producing equipments that would sum up to 100k. I'd live in a simple farm with
no problem.

Grandazer • 1 point • 14 February, 2021 05:46 PM

I just want to have a passive income that covers my expenses nothing less and nothing more.

Trp2727272 • 1 point • 14 February, 2021 06:21 PM

Facts. We should all aim for that.

decred_sia • 1 point • 14 February, 2021 06:34 PM

You want to have freedom and security, how does your practice of live deliver that?

Trp2727272 • 1 point • 14 February, 2021 06:40 PM

I live minimally. I doubt I’ll ever have a security or freedom issue.

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