By: Henry Osher, Age 17, Connecticut, USA

Description: Hero interrupts the Villain’s monologue

Genre: Comedic
Listen buddy, I’m gonna stop you right there. You don’t understand how many
times I’ve heard this kind of thing already. I’m honestly sick of monologues.
You’re just gonna waste my time explaining your master plan and patting
yourself on the back even though we both already know how this is gonna go.
I’m gonna send you packing like I do to everyone else, and you’ll end up nothing
more than a two-bit, D-list villain with an inferiority complex. If this was a comic
book, they’d put you in a filler issue, give you a mediocre backstory, and never
talk about you again. All you’re gonna be is a piece of trivia for superhero nerds
with nothing better to spend their time on. But me? I’m the Golden “Boy”! I
literally get paid to beat up people like you. So I have an idea, instead of giving
me a novel, how about you just sum it up in a few words and let me enjoy the
rest of my Sunday? What’s it gonna be? Kidnapping the Mayor? Bridge bombing?
Mass mind control? I’ve seen it all buddy. You’re nothing special. That’s what you
gotta get through your thick skull. You’ll never be an archenemy or on the
starting roster of an evil team. You’ll never take over the world or have any
henchmen. You’ll never do anything with your sad little life and that’s that. Oh,
did I make you cry? Sorry man, but the truth hurts. You know what they say; if
you can’t handle the heat, stay out of the kitchen. Now let’s get this over with.

Notes: I gotta change the “Boy” part.