TANTRIC SEX

GUIDE TO SEXUAL
HEALING
COMMUNICATION AND
EROTIC PLEASURE

2nd Edition
by Jeffery Dawson
Contents
Introduction
Chapter 1: What Is Tantra And Tantric Sex?
Chapter 2: Benefits Of Tantric Sex
Chapter 3: The Basics of Tantric Sex
Chapter 4: Tantric Communication Essentials
Chapter 5: Spin Your Chakras And Breathe To Ecstasy
Chapter 6: Identify And Worship The God Or Goddess Within
You
Chapter 7: Prepare Your Temple Of Love; Your Body
Chapter 8: Exercising and Getting Fit Together
Chapter 9: Basic Tantric Positions And Techniques
Chapter 10: Tantric Exercises
Chapter 11: Some Quick Tantric Tips
Chapter 12 The Link between Kabala and Tantra
Chapter 13 The Science behind Tantric Sex
Chapter 14 Tantric Sex and Men ’ s Multiple Orgasms
Chapter 15 The Female Orgasm
Chapter 16 How to Give an Erotic Massage to Help Increase
Intimacy
Chapter 17 Supplementary Activities to Improve Tantric
Sex
Chapter 18 : Teachings of tantric sex
Chapter 19 Tantric Sex During Pregnancy
Conclusion
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Introduction

“Sex” is a very crucial part of life and an activity that needs to

be performed by adults, for their mental and physical well
being. But lives, today, have become so hectic that even 24
hours don’t seem enough. In between work life and a social
life, people are left strapped for time and more often than not
forgo sex.

As per recent studies “sexless marriages” are becoming more

and more pertinent, where the couple either engages in very
little sexual activity or does not engage in any activity at all. It
is estimated that 20% of married people below 40 years of age
have sex only a couple of times a year.

These do not look like healthy statistics and it becomes all the
more important for people to reform their ways and start
having more sex, in order to lead better lives and have
fulfilling relationships.

One way to ignite a sexual spark is through a technique known

as “Tantra” helps couples communicate better and attain
heightened levels of orgasm through its practice. “Tantric sex”
is a form of sexual activity, wherein couples partake in various
mutually engaging and satisfying each other and slowly
amalgamating into one soul.

In this book, we explore Tantric sex in detail and go through

its various aspects - including its meaning, its various benefits,
some basic tantric sex positions and why tantric sex embodies
sexual freedom.
I hope you enjoy your journey and find it useful in spicing up
your life and relationship.
Chapter 1: What Is Tantra And Tantric
Sex?

Before we look at the meaning of tantric sex, we must first

understand the meaning of Tantra. “Tantra” is a word that
traces its roots to ancient India, where several saints and other
holy men engaged in ritualistic, deep, meditational
techniques. Believed to have existed since the 5th century
A.D., the technique is viewed as being an exploration of the
deep conscience, which helps harness divine consciousness.

The concept then rapidly travelled across the world and

modern day usage of the term saw a meaning that took on a
whole new tangent. The very word-Tantra-in the western
world today translates to “Tantric Sex”. Tantric sex involves
engaging in a unified sexual activity with a partner to garner
divine consciousness. In other words, treating sex as a
pathway, that leads towards sexual nirvana.
History of Tantra
The very origins of tantric sex remains obscure but is widely
believed that a community known as the “Lemurians” first
started practicing this form of sacred sex. They treated the
body as being a divine vessel and made use of aromatherapy
and stimulating techniques to reel in divine liberation. Some
believe that Tantra is closely related to the Indian exercise
practice of “yoga”, which also follows the similar principle of
assuming certain bodily postures in order to grow closer to
god.

Although Tantric sex is now extremely popular in the western

world with many celebrities such as singer Sting, the late
Steve jobs and actress, singer Madonna, all having admitted to
have trying the technique, it is now slowly being accepted as a
viable practice all over the world.

Several purists vouch for its extreme effectiveness in bringing

about heightened pleasure.

Tantric sex satisfies people in the following aspects:

Physically- Complete satisfaction with the entire body

feeling extremely pleasured.

Mentally- Absolute emotional connect with your partner

and mental unity.

Spiritually, the two bodies become one soul with both

growing extremely close to god/divine spirit.
Tantra involves the two energies viz. female energy called
“Shakti” and male energy called “Shiva”. Shiva and Shakti are
Hindu gods, whose idol worship includes “Linga” meaning
penis and “Yon” referring to the vagina.

When two people engage in tantric sex, the female energy of

Shakti rises up through the various chakras of the body and
pierces through the female energy center known as the
Kundalini and merges with the male-Shiva and unison of
divinity comes to the fore.
Various aspects of Tantric Sex
Tantric communication
Tantric communication refers to the mental and emotional
merging of a couple and bringing them extremely close to each
other. It is the process of turning ordinary couples into soul
mates.
Tantric positions
Tantric sex defines certain specified positions that help a
couple come extremely close.
Tantric exercises and breathing
There are various exercises and breathing techniques that one
can practice to make the best use of the tantric way of sex.

How does Tantric Sex free your mind, body and

soul?

Every practice involving meditation explains the benefits that

a person has when they quiet their mind. These very benefits
exist when you are following the path of tantric sex. There are
techniques that you can use to ensure that you have a quiet
mind. These techniques have been mentioned in the book.

When you are following the path of Tantric sec, you will have
to pay attention to your actions while making love to your
partner. If you are mindful of your actions, you can ensure that
you are inducing a sense of reverence and respect for your
partner. You will begin to honor your partner as the god or
goddess he or she represents.

The main goal of tantric sex is to help you find a release from
your mind and your body. When you find this release, you will
be able to express yourself with ease and find that there is
deeper love that will touch your soul.

Tantric sex helps you heal

The greatest use of tantric sex is that it helps in healing your
body and your soul. It also helps in freeing your mind from
unwanted thoughts. You would have suffered hurt and
rejection due to your past relationships. You might have been
hurt in a terrible way too! But you learn to forgive yourself
and to love yourself through tantric sex. There are different
techniques mentioned in the book that help you heal yourself
from feeling guilty or embarrassed. You find yourself
empowered! Tantric sex helps you heal through the following
steps:

You identify what has hurt you in the past. This could have
been real hurt or imaginary. You will have to identify the
difference. This is done through sexual stimulation.
You will be able to find a release to any emotion that is
attached to this hurt.
You will be able to replace your hurt with tons of powerful
and positive emotions and experiences.

Tantric Sex is Magical!

Tantric sex is magic! You will find that the different
techniques that have been mentioned help you overcome all
your hurt and fears. You will learn creative new techniques
that can be used to improve your method of expressing your
joy and love! These techniques, as an added benefit, help you
feel young!
Myths and Truths about Tantric Sex and Tantra

Tantra is a concept that celebrates sexuality. People have

misunderstood Tantra and have begun to criticize it without
knowing what it entails in reality. This section covers the
myths and truths about Tantra and Tantric sex.

Myth
Tantric sex is only about sex!

Truth
Tantric sex does not always require a genital contact. It only
deals with connecting the souls of both partners through
energy. Intercourse or the contact between the genitals only
increases the connection between the souls. But this is done
only when the couple is ready for that level of intimacy.

Myth
If you practice the art of Tantra you are giving up on attaining
pleasure.

Truth
This myth is based on the first myth mentioned. This is an
extreme belief that is not true! Tantra does not mean that you
have to renounce any sexual pleasure, though some yogic
practices do. Tantra helps in enhancing your level of joy and
pleasure. Tantric sex does not deny you desires. You do not
have to mimic a yogi sitting cross-legged and meditating.
Tantra recognizes that sex plays a powerful role in every
person’s life. Tantric sex helps you harness the power and to
achieve bliss. This bliss is beyond the bliss attained through
physical pleasure.
Myth
Tantric sex increases your need for sex and pleasure, which
leads to affairs.

Truth
Tantric sex does neither increase your sexual appetite nor
makes you indulge uncontrollably in sex. Instead it helps you
control your desires and also channel them for a higher
purpose that you are not familiar with. There are people who
believe that on the pretext of Tantric sex they can indulge in
sexual relationships with multiple partners. That is however
not the true essence of the Tantra. The Tantra is about the
strong physical and spiritual commitment between two people.
You must remember that sexuality is not supposed to be
thrown away mindlessly. It needs to be honored and to ensure
that you attain higher levels of consciousness instead of only
attaining satisfaction. You will learn to control yourself when
you are around other people since you believe that you can
resist any sexual urges that you have for a person when you
are with a partner. You learn to build a relationship that does
not always need a physical connection.

Myth
If you practice Tantric sex, you will turn into a
nymphomaniac.

Truth
It is true that Tantric sex does release an immense amount of
sexual energy. It is also true that you are giving yourself the
green signal to express yourself explicitly. Hence there are
chances that you may misuse these techniques to ensure that
you are satiated. But you have to restrain yourself. You will
have to overcome any overwhelming needs that will lead you
to practice meaningless and random sex.
The Ten pledges of Tantra

When you have decided to follow the path of tantric sex, there
are ten pledges that you have to remember. Before you begin
on the path, you have to see how you feel about the pledges.
You should feel a sense of peace while reading the pledges
stated below.

I pledge to explore the divinity that exists in my body.

I pledge to honor and follow the gods and goddesses that
exist within the others.
I pledge to explore both my sexuality and sensuality to
ensure that my organs are not blocked due to any emotions.
I pledge to maintain a balance between my soul,
relationships and surroundings.
I pledge to use the balance that I have maintained to ensure
that the rest of the world is at bliss.
I pledge to understand and to discover my sexuality to
ensure harmony in all my relationships.
I pledge to ensure that every emotional blockage that exists
from my past or from my present is removed. This will free
my spirit and allow me to express myself with joy.
I pledge to connect to the child in me to ensure joy.
I pledge to be a lover and a healer for my partner and
myself.
I pledge to use the rejuvenated sexual energy wisely to
ensure that I am self – confident, gentle and at harmony
with myself, my partner and the people in the world.
You have to participate and observe
As mentioned you will have to ensure that your mind is calm
and quiet. Only this way you will be able to be both the
participant and the observer at the same time. This means that
while you are making love, you are observing your partner’s
actions and also observing your actions.

When you are paying attention to your actions, you are being a
witness. This will help you overcome any kind of anxiety.
When men or women are making love, they have a million
doubts about their stamina and whether or not what they are
doing pleases their partner. When you are following the path
of tantric sex, you are playing witness to yourself. You are
paying attention to your thoughts and are working on focusing
your attention to your partner. You will be able to pay attention
to your body and to your partner’s body and will also be able
to focus on your breath! The following section covers three
techniques that you can use to be both a participant and an
observer.
Mantras
Have you ever been terribly bored and begun to hum a sound
continuously? Did it seem to have a hypnotic effect on you?
Mantras are just the same. They are silent or spoken sounds
and elicit reactions from the body due to their vibrations.
These vibrations correspond with the seven chakras in the
body. If you have never felt it before, say ‘Om’ and draw deep
breaths corresponding to the ‘Om’. You will find that you are
able to focus your mind. You can also control the movement of
energy within your body. This works in the same way that
your favorite music does. You will find yourself calming
down. You might also find yourself in an entirely different
world. When you use mantras, you find that you are able to go
where your mind takes you.
The sounds made while saying the mantras are short and
repetitive. It is this repetition that causes the hypnotic effect.
They might also be a single word, a sentence or a verse. If you
find that you do not know any mantra, make up one on your
own. It could be a word or a phrase or even a simple sound
that you would like to say!
Yantras
A yantra is a mathematical technique that is used. You may not
like mathematics, but you should know that geometric figures
are very essential when it comes to tantric sex. You will have
to focus on the images that stimulate your sexuality. You have
to keep in mind the figures that have stimulated a certain
sexual response from you. When you are making love and find
yourself feeling anxious, you have to focus on such figures.
Different geometric symbols relate to the seven different
chakras within our body. It is in these chakras that the energy
is stored. A famous Yantra is the sex point David star.
Things you should know about Tantric sex
All of you must have heard about tantric sex, from one source
or the other. It is quite natural that you are confused about
what tantric sex is all about. The reason for this is quite
simple; the way it is portrayed in movies and on TV is quite
different from what it is all about. Therefore it does not come
as a surprise that most people do not know what it actually
comprises of. Not just this, but there is also a stigma of sorts
that is associated with tantric sex. It is considered by many as
a weird form of pornography or even voodoo. All this is not
true and is completely baseless. Tantric sex is in fact based on
the principal of tantra. Tantra is an ancient art to achieve
fulfillment and enlightenment; it is about living one’s life in a
manner that is free and open. To put it simply, Tantric sex is
not a crazy practice; it is all about achieving a stronger and a
more meaningful bond of intimacy with your partner. But this
is not the only quality that differentiates Tantra from regular
sex. Following are some facts that are surely going to change
your perception of Tantra and might provide you with the
motivation to try it.

It is not just all about sex

So, Tantric sex is not just about sex. This does seem
surprising, doesn’t it? The physical aspect of sex is about
touching and rubbing, and you might be engaging in all this in
your normal sexual intercourse. What sets Tantric sex apart
from the normal routine is that in tantric sex it is not just the
physical aspect that matters, but it is also essential that the
partners can connect with each other on a mental level, as
well. It would be really helpful if you and your partner can just
forget all about orgasms for a bit while engaging in sex. When
you do away with the expectations, you will be able to focus
your energy on being with each other and appreciating the
moment you are in. Tantric sex is all about creating intimacy
between the partners and each of you must focus on forming a
connection with the other. The sexual aspect of tantric sex is
amazing because you are both truly connected to each other on
a mental level and this bond can transcend any physical bond.

Tantric sex can heal you

Normal sex has the capacity to satisfy your physical urges or
needs, but tantric sex has the power to do so much more on
many different levels. All the traumatic experiences you might
have endured or even anxiety that is a reminder of previous
bad relationships can all be healed by making use of Tantric
sex. Tantric sex includes meditations, focusing on breathing
and eye contact, these when practiced while having sex will
definitely help in generating a healthier state of mind. Tantra is
all about going slow and gentle touches, these will definitely
facilitate in chasing away any bad memories. Tantric sex can
help you move over you bad experiences.

Achieving full body orgasms

Well, this claim might seem a little dubious, but it actually is
true. The pleasures that you can experience from Tantric sex
will be much higher than the pleasure obtained from any
normal or regular intercourse. This is because in Tantric sex if
practiced properly can help in achieving what is known as a
full body orgasm. And this is quite natural. This happens
because you can focus on spreading the sexual energy to all
the cells present in your body instead of restricting this energy
just to your genitals. When you do this the pleasure you
experience will also be intense.

It can be slightly challenging

Tantric sex is not an easy task. Even if you have known your
partner for all your life, performing tantric sex can be slightly
challenging. But this is natural. All you need is some
additional focus and practice to master this art. Tantric sex is
about lovemaking in its most pristine of forms, it means the
persons engaged should let go of all their inhibitions. There
are no cheats and quick tricks that can help you gain mastery
over this. It is about turning off your thinking process and
redefining the pervious ideas and concepts of lovemaking that
are imbibed in you. So, now the question is how to actually
define lovemaking. It is recommended that you both sit on the
bed and are facing each other and are gazing at each other
longingly, and explore each other; body, mind and soul. You
can connect with each other while making out or engaging in
sexual intercourse, but the true emotional connectivity will
only be generated when you can both let go of your thought
process and just concentrate on each other.

Tantric sex courses are available

Before you start freaking out, these courses are not orgies and
do not include any graphic or awkward demonstrations. These
classes are all about teaching couples how they can connect
with each other on a deeper level and all about forming bonds
with each other that can transcend the physical boundaries.
There are a host of topics that are covered under these courses
and you can practice all this with your partner in the privacy of
your own home. These courses are available online as well, for
those who might be conscious about going to a class. Once
you have gotten the basics right, what will follow will be
simply mind blowing sex.
Chapter 2: Benefits Of Tantric Sex

As was explained in the previous chapter, Tantric sex helps

bring two people together and attain a spiritual high, from way
of conscious physical coupling. In this chapter, we highlight
the various benefits of tantric sex and how it helps couples in
garnering a new level of pleasure.
Individual growth
Tantric sex helps couples grow individually. The process helps
unify two souls, no doubt, but it also contributes towards the
growth of the individual. A person grows mentally, physically
and emotionally and betters the overall being of a person. For
women, the Kundalini is ignited, which allows for a stronger
feminine quality to shine through. She starts to glow and emits
a positive attitude. The male energy or Shiva helps a man
harness peace and strengthens his masculine features.
Exploring the limits
With quickies and self-pleasure techniques becoming all the
more pertinent, people are missing out on the goodness of
meaningful sex and often end up with not exploring their true
sexual limits. That is where tantric sex steps in. Tantric sex
helps individuals explore the absolute limits of their sexuality.
When a couple engages in tantric sex, a very deep sort of
connection is made, which allows each person to reach the
ultimate limits of sexual experience. It turns into a team effort
where each individual helps the other person reel in maximum
physical, emotional and spiritual pleasure.
Heightened orgasms
With tantric sex, the level of orgasm is heightened. The
positions that are specified under this form of sex help people
get into various positions, which help in invigorating all the
right spots. There is widespread belief that women attain a
higher level of orgasm as compared to men but that is not true.
With tantric sex, both men and women reach a high level of
orgasm and the various benefits of the process are availed by
both the parties.
Knowing what works best
Once people get a hang of it, the process of tantric sex starts to
become more enjoyable. With each successive session, people
become aware of their own pleasure points and also
understand as to where their partner’s “feel good” points lie.
Once the pleasure points are identified, people automatically
start to stimulate them and help bring about a great experience
every single time. The physical and mental bond only deepens
over time to a stage where the two people become dependent
on each other’s sexual energy.
Timed bliss
When it comes to tantric sex, both individuals can time their
orgasms. Once people gain a control over their minds and
bodies, they automatically tune into attaining mutual bliss.
When two people have timed orgasms, a new form of energy
flows through each, which amplifies the experience. Tantric
sex also advises staying connected after the act in order to
continue creating a bond. Most practices end with stimulating
other parts of the body such as the neck and shoulders, which
helps bring the two people even closer.
Monogamy
It is widely believed that tantric sex can help a couple remain
together for the rest of their lives. When two individuals
connect on a deep level basis, they start becoming dependent.
That dependency and connection cannot be mimicked and so
individuals prefer having the same sexual partner. The
frequency of sessions starts to increase, which helps deepen
the bond each time and allows the individuals to remain loyal
to each other.
Health benefits
Tantric sex helps bring about good health.

Women benefit as their monthly cycles become more

regular, which helps their bodies remain in good shape.

Tantric sex can further the tendency of becoming pregnant,

as the male hormones help produce stronger and healthier
sperms.

Immunity is increased as the orgasms fuel body cells and

help in the combating of diseases.

Both men and women start to appear younger as sex can

take away stress, which can cause wrinkles to appear. It also
helps to add a new glow to the face.

Apart from the physical benefits, tantric sex can help

eliminate depression as orgasms help release a lot of
serotonin. The serotonin keeps the cortisol at bay thus
resulting in elevated moods.
Inhibitions
With tantric sex, people become more comfortable with their
own bodies. Many people are extremely conscious about their
bodies and more often than not end up having mediocre
sessions owing to the fear of being judged. But with tantric
sex, people start to embrace their own bodies and start to look
at it as a vessel that will help them grow closer to god.

People start to let go and allow their bodies to experience

physical pleasure. Various taboos and religious constraints are
tackled, as it is a known fact that tantric sex is a branch of
meditation and various gods are invoked through the process.
Power struggle
Now people who watch the series “The Game of Thrones” will
be aware of how Daenerys Targaryen (Khaleesi) breaks the
rules and decides to pleasure her alpha-male husband by
taking charge. Khal Drogo objects at first but gives in once he
realizes as to how pleasurable the experience really is.

When it comes to sex, most people face a power struggle. Both

men and women like to show that they are in power and often
end up either upsetting the other or getting upset themselves.
But with tantric sex, that problem is eliminated as both parties
have an equal control over the other and themselves. The
positions allow both parties to be in charge and pleasure each
other equally.
Happiness
Tantric sex can channel all the right forms of energy and help
people lead extremely happy lives. Growing close to god can
help satisfy people’s need to have a connection with the divine
spirit.
Increase Love
Every person has a mind that is always busy thinking about
some person or the other. These people may not be their
partners. They may break off the relationship with their partner
on the pretext of not feeling the love any longer. When you
follow the path of tantric sex, you realize that you are able to
love yourself, your partner and are able to nurture each other!
Empowers both men and women
Most women suffer low self – esteem. They feel that they do
not have a body that is perfect. They may not have the power
to say no to their partner when they are making love. They
may not want to have sex but are forced into it because they
cannot say no. They may not tell their partner what they truly
want which reduces the pleasure that they receive. However,
in tantric sex, women are treated as goddesses and are
honored. They are always given what they desire and what
they deserve.

Men always worry about the size of their penis. They also
worry about whether or not they are able to give their partners
pleasure. Most often, they do not know how to commit to their
partners and always worry about how long they can last while
making love. When they follow the path of tantric sex, they
feel empowered since they are honored as god. They tend to
become confident and are open to a relationship. They also
become caring and shower their partner with immense love.
Immense Satisfaction
There are times when you have made love and have felt that
there is something that was missing. You may feel that you are
not finished with the sex. This happens often since sex does
not go beyond intercourse. Sex alone does not touch a person’s
heart. In tantric sex, you find that you are able to reach that
state where you find yourself nurtured. You find that every cell
in your body has found its mate in your partner’s body. When
you have had sex that touches the heart, you find that you have
a content mind and body.
Alleviates Depression
Tantric sex is your personal psychiatrist. It helps you
overcome anxiety and depression. You may be tired and also
find it difficult to eat or sleep. Tantric sex works wonders
when it comes to the aforementioned problems. It helps in
eradicating the problem. You find yourself with an immense
amount of energy that helps spread a peace and calm
throughout your body and mind.

It helps in healing past wounds. You may have had

experiences where you would have felt betrayed or even
traumatized. Tantric sex helps in healing you since you are
honored and respected while making love and also in life. It
also helps in deepening your connection with others relieving
you from the depression that one has when they are alone. You
will be able to create strong bonds that will last a lifetime.
Elevate sex
Tantric sex ensures that sex is not meaningless. You are able to
ensure that there is sanctity in what you do during sex. Tantric
sex makes sure that sex is not just a physical act but is an act
that creates a strong connection between the partners. Tantric
sex helps in increasing your pleasure. You find that you have
techniques that help you feel a glow within yourself after sex.
You will be able to direct your energy and manifest it in both
the physical and spiritual world.
Create a positive effect on the world
Since you are gaining from the sex, you will create a positive
approach towards the world. You will extend your positivity to
every person you come across. These people could be altering
the energy that exists within the different levels in the planet.
Chapter 3: The Basics of Tantric Sex

When you begin to follow the path of tantric sex, you begin to
find a change in yourself. You find yourself changing how you
view yourself and how you view the world. You find yourself
looking at relationships that will last a lifetime. Through your
journey, you will learn that every man and woman has a
certain level of divinity in them. You will start to view sex as a
sacred act instead of just a physical act. You will also learn to
love deeper and find that you are soaring to different levels of
bliss.

You will only have a successful journey when you relieve

yourself from any preconceived notions. You should not think
of what you need to do and what your lover must do to please
you. When you read this chapter, you will be able to identify
new ideas about yourself and also embrace new ideas about
yourself. You will also learn how to have great sex!

You will learn the basic concepts of tantric sex and identify
new exciting ways to life and love. This chapter will be worth
it!
The Yin and the Yang: Which is male and which is
female?
You must be familiar with the stereotypes that men are from
Mars and women are from Venus. This implies that men are
assertive and extremely powerful while women are soft and
fragile who are only fit for nurturing. There are other
stereotypes that men do not show any feelings whatsoever,
while women have a plethora of emotion that is ready to
unleash itself in a second. It has also been said that women do
not take credit for the work that they do, since being outgoing
is something only men are familiar with. Over the last few
years there has been a drastic change in the way men and
women think.

Tantric sex is a firm follower of the fact that men and women
do have opposite characteristics. This is the elementary
principle of the Tantra. The eastern theories claim that the Yin
represents feminism while the Yang represents masculinity.
But there is no concrete proof that a woman cannot have Yang
characteristics or that a man cannot have Yin characteristics.
Rather than viewing men and woman as two entities, you
should begin to focus on the energies. The Tantra believes in
the amalgamation of these two energies.
Shiva and Shakti
The most common image of the Yin and the Yang is the Hindu
divine couple Lord Shiva and Goddess Shakti. Lord Shiva
represents the entire universe since he is considered the creator
and Goddess Shakti represents the root of all energy. The
union of the two deities creates a longing in you and every
other human being to be treated as a god or a goddess. This is
discussed in detail in the following chapters. You will learn to
worship your partner as a god or a goddess.

The male energy that is found in Lord Shiva represents ecstasy

while the energy in Goddess Shakti represents wisdom. This
magical combination is what helps a person attain
enlightenment. This perfect couple is always represented in
numerous entwined positions – either dancing, or embracing
or standing together. There are other positions where Goddess
Shakti is wrapped around Lord Shiva with her legs propped
around his hips. The dancing position by far is the most sacred
since they are able to free their spirit, giving them a chance to
attain enlightenment.

Understanding the opposites

You may have made divisions amongst you and your partner.
You have to first identify and understand these divisions to
strike a balance between the opposite energies. There are quite
a few stereotypical characteristics that you may relate to. You
will have to identify those characteristics and make note of
them. You have to go from one extreme to the next. You
should ask your partner to do this too. You will then have to
see how you can embrace the extreme characteristics that you
and your partner have. You have to identify how you can
strike a balance between the polarities that exist between you
and your partner. You will have to identify the Yin to your
partner’s Yang and vice versa.

You might now wonder if it is true that opposites attract. Sit

back and think for yourself. You will be able to answer this
question on your own. Try analyzing your past relationships.
See how you and your partner were different from each other.
Identify whether the differences were complemented by each
other. This will help you analyze your future relationships as
well.
My partner is my beloved
Tantra is not mad love but sacred love. You are honoring your
partner and cherishing your partner while making love. You
will shower unconditional love on your partner. When you are
talking to your partner, use loving words like ‘darling’ or
‘beloved’. You will find that those little words have aroused
feelings of love within your partner. Call your partner with the
aforementioned loving words when talking about him or her in
public. You might find it terribly strange to do so but you will
be sending out a message of love to the person you are
speaking to.
The Desire Spectrum
You will find yourself with new views of desire. You may feel
a desire every time you think of someone. You may comment
on how you want a guy or how hot a girl is when you see them
passing. You only feel these desires when you feel incomplete.
Since you feel incomplete, you always want another person.
You find yourself feeling needy and feeling wanted. But when
you do get the person you want, you begin to want something
more. You want someone prettier, more interesting and
sometimes someone richer. Through tantric sex, you will be
able to detach yourself from superficial needs. This will help
you create a healthier relationship with your partner.
You feel empowered to say what you want!
When you find yourself empowered, you are able to set
boundaries both during sex and in life in general. You find
yourself with a new level of self – esteem. In tantric sex, you
OWN your body and your soul. When your partner wants you
to enter you, he must ask for your permission. You should not
be afraid and have to say yes or no as the situation demands.
You have to step and say that you do not want to be touched in
a way that is not comfortable with. You empower your partner
when you speak the truth this way. You will be giving your
partner the methods to use to please you. You have to be okay
with how you are touched and how you feel.
Chapter 4: Tantric Communication
Essentials

Tantric sex requires the two individuals to have a good level of

communication. It makes for a very involving form of sexual
practice, where both individuals need to make an equal
contribution both verbally and physically in order to reap the
benefits of the practice.

Talking while having tantric sex is crucial and here below, we

highlight the key points to bear in mind during a session.
Looking into the eye
It is vital to maintain eye contact during sexual sessions. You
have to let go of inhibitions and gaze into each other’s eyes.
The left is believed to be the receiving eye and so
concentrating on the left eye will help you understand your
partner’s feelings. When you speak, you must do so by
looking into their right eye.

You must align your bodies in such a way that your speech
flows freely and you can maintain a constant eye contact.
Avoid closing your eyes while your partner is talking and
make a note of all the emotions that are emoted while talking.
It might take some time to establish long periods of eye gazing
but keeping at it will help you attain perfection.
Smile
Have a smile or a pleasant face when you speak during sex.
Avoid making funny faces or pretending like you are not
interested in speaking. When you establish a certain level of
connection with your partner then your facial expressions will
automatically turn pleasant.
Speaking your mind out
Speak your mind out. Do not hold on to thoughts or look for
the right opportunity. Tell your partner everything that comes
to mind and try speaking from the heart. Allow your mind to
guide your body language speak your heart.
Emote
Make use of your hands and add to your speech. Make
symbols and signs and tell your partner as to how much they
pleasure you. Use facial expressions to convey messages. Use
them in tandem with your speech to add leverage to it. Don’t
be afraid to smile/laugh/cry when you speak, as it will help
your partner empathize and connect with you better. There are
certain hand mudras that you can make, which will help you
channel your energy and thoughts and allow you to emote it in
a better way.

Avoid doing things that can be putting off - like grinding your
teeth or crackling your knuckles and concentrate on looking
into your partner’s eye.
Encourage and evoke
When you speak to your partner, make sure that you
encourage them to speak up. It has to be mutual and you have
to make communication a two-way street. Say things that will
evoke a response and respond to your partner’s stimuli. Do not
keep talking non-stop and allow your partner to respond to
you. Do not judge or pass comments about what your partner
says. Give them time and allow them to come into their own.
Clarity
When talking to a partner before or after sex, it is important to
be clear. Voice modulation is important and you need to be
clear and audible. Nobody likes a mumbling person and
someone who talks nonsense without thinking. It becomes
important to know exactly what to say and when and change
the levels and pitch of the voice accordingly. Put some thought
into it before you speak and simply don’t shoot your mouth
just to keep talking.

Whispering is also a great idea and certain words like “I love

you” and “you are beautiful” are better whispered.
Fluidity
You have to be fluid in your speech and be carefree. You
cannot stop in between to think of what you need to say. When
it comes to tantric sex, each session can last from anywhere
between 5 to 7 hours and so you have to be prepared mentally
and emotionally to say all the right things.

Do not tire yourself out by talking too much and have a few
fluid and pertinent thoughts channeled and emoted. Allow
your energy to flow freely and look at the sea of difference
that it will make for you and your partner.
Honesty
Be honest and speak your mind out. Try avoiding exaggerating
or lying about something just to make it sound nice. Keep it
simple and truthful in order to express yourself in the best
manner possible.
Breathing
Concentrate on your breathing and time your breaths. Do not
speak constantly and forget to breathe as it can slow you down
and make you speak in a low voice. Be aware of your
breathing and have a good control over it.
Chapter 5: Spin Your Chakras And
Breathe To Ecstasy

There are many practices that you will come across in this
book. These practices are fun and you may find them
fascinating! These practices include different sounds, symbols
and sights that will help you on your journey to ecstasy. You
will learn a few techniques in this chapter. You will need to
practice these techniques in order to perfect them. The most
important aspect of tantric sex is what you are doing this very
second: breathing. It is very important that you breathe
properly in order to ensure that you are able to attain the
deepest level of intimacy and the highest level of bliss.

Why is your breath important?

When you breathe right, you are supplying your body with the
perfect amount of oxygen. You are also letting your emotions
and sensuality flow freely. You will be able to have multiple
orgasms and may also be euphoric. Your breath is what helps
you last longer during sex. It also helps you ensure that the
love between you and your partner is intimate. This sounds
like child’s play does it not? But wait! There is a problem that
needs to be addressed. You are holding your breath too much!
Every human being does. Focus on how you are breathing at
this very second. You are not expanding your chest are you?
Your breathing is shallow. This is not healthy! This section
covers three simple techniques that you can use to ensure that
you breathe correctly.

Focus on the source of your breath

Have you identified that there is a place in your body where
your breathing starts? Do you think it is from your throat or
chest or stomach area? It is not supposed to come from either
of those areas. You have to make the effort to ensure that you
breathe from deep within your body. To ensure that you
breathe properly, you will have to take a deep breath. Take the
breath in slowly and trace the place where the breathing stops
with your hand. Then exhale. The next time you breathe you
will have to ensure that you take your breath from as low as
your genitals. This helps in firing up the energy that you need
to have during sex.

Egg to Eagle
This is a great technique to use when you are sitting. You will
have to bend into the shape of a ball. When you are bending
you have to exhale swiftly. Bring your hands close to your
body and place them on the back of your head. Do you feel
your back stretching? Inhale and move up slowly into your
sitting position. Stretch your hands as far back as you can.
Ensure that your elbows are behind you. You should now feel
your chest stretching. Arch your back and throw your chest
out. You will now feel all the air rushing into your chest.
Continue this exercise. You will be able to breathe well after a
few repetitions.
The Wells
The aim of this exercise is to take air into your lungs. You will
have to take a lot of air into your lungs. This can only be done
when you think of your lungs as wells. You will be able to
increase the virtual capacity of your lungs. Keep your arms to
your side. After you have inhaled, hold the air for a few
seconds and blow all the air out with immense force. It should
sound like a gust of wind. Then suck in the air by making as
much noise as possible. You will make such sound while
making love to your partner. Through this exercise, you will
be able to ensure that the sounds you make during sexual
intercourse are intense!
Chapter 6: Identify And Worship The
God Or Goddess Within You

Tantra is the path that most people follow in order to approach

God. God leaves you with a divine blessing in every aspect of
your life. This aspect also includes sex. You are able to
connect with God and the divine feeling only when you are
making love with your partner since this is when you are
honoring and experiencing each other’s divinity. It is believed
in tantra that every man and every woman is a god and a
goddess. This implies that you are a divine being and have the
ability to attain great levels of wisdom. You only have to be
released from your shell. Your self – esteem grows since you
are honoring and being honored by your partner. Only when
you see the divine aspect of yourself will you be able to see
the divinity in others.

Over the course of the chapter, you will be able to identify the
divinity in you. You will be able to identify the god and the
goddess within yourself and your partner. This is the essence
of tantric sex. You will also be able to achieve enlightenment.
The chapter covers the different gods and goddesses that are
popular in the tantra. You can relate yourself to these
goddesses and identify your divinity.
What is meant by the terms ‘God’ and ‘Goddess’?
As mentioned above, in tantra every man and woman is treated
as a god or a goddess. This is to ensure that you consider
yourself as a god or a goddess and consider your partner as the
same. That way you will honor and respect them in the way
you would your god or goddess. You will also be able to honor
the power that exists in the universe.

The deities worshipped in tantric sex are generally angels or

beings filled with light. They are symbols of different energies
and relationships. The other terms for god and goddesses are
Devi and deva, priest and priestess and daka and dakini. These
deities are said to have powers and wisdom in them. This
power can also be projected within you. This projection
depends on your virtues and qualities.

Goddess is a term that is popularly used in tantra. It has been

used regularly diminishing its original meaning. It is now used
to describe a woman who is in touch with the feminine power
that resides within her. The initial meaning stated that a
woman who was both nurturing and strong is a goddess. A
man is not called god often since god is considered to be a
super being according to certain religions. There are some
religions and practices that say that a person can become a god
or a goddess only when they change some aspect of
themselves. But Tantric sex states that you are a god or a
goddess since birth. There is nothing that can be done to
change that since you have a certain divinity within yourself.

Tantric sex states that no matter what the race, religion or caste
of the person he or she is a god or a goddess, respectively. By
calling a woman a goddess you are honoring her
characteristics of being a lover, hunter, seductress, a healer, a
wild woman and a nurturing mother. Only when she accepts
these characteristics in herself will she be able to honor herself
and be honored by her partner and people around her. By
addressing a man as god, you are honoring his characteristics
of being a protector, a provider, and a symbol of power, a
healer and a person with a surrendering nature. He has to
accept these characteristics within himself and be honored by
his partner! You may display these characteristics or it may be
in you, and you are yet to discover it.
Identify your roles and characteristics
When you begin your journey on the path leading to Tantric
sex, you will have to first identify the gods and goddesses that
are define you. For this you will have to identify your
characteristics and also identify the roles you play in life. Are
you beautiful? Are you a hunter? Are you an entrepreneur?
Are you powerful? And so on. You will have to write down all
the answers to such questions. To make it simpler, you can
create a collage of yourself. You could place your picture in
the center of a sheet of paper and indicate all your
characteristics and roles through text or pictures.

Once you have read about the different gods and goddesses
mentioned in the latter part of the chapter, you could write the
names of the deities that you relate to most. For instance, if
you had written that you are a hunter you can relate yourself
‘Artemis’ and if you had written that you were powerful, you
could relate to either ‘Ares’ or ‘Shiva’.
Look beyond the superficial aspect of a being
Have you heard of the phrase, ‘never judge a book by its
cover’? Everybody has! Yet we still resort to judging a person
by the way they look, dress or what job they have. You may
have made statements like ‘She is fat’ or ‘He is too short’. You
may have also looked at the person’s bank account before you
went on a date with the person or got married to the person.
But when it comes to tantra, there is no such thing as a bank
account. You have to look beyond the superficial
characteristics of the person and identify the divinity that
exists within the person.

There are three essential steps that you have to follow in order
to worship the divinity in your partner through the path of
Tantra.

You have to first accept the divinity that exists in you.

Embrace and identify the divinity in your partner. You have
to establish a balance between the male and female deities.
This helps in establishing a balance between the energies in
you and your partner.
You have to unite the gods and goddesses within you
through the union of you and your partner. This creates the
perfect balance between the energies. You can ensure that
you will attain the highest level of ecstasy.

Why is it important to worship each other?

Every person is happy when they are acknowledged. It is great
to be appreciated by people around you. Do you know how it
feels when someone notices you? Do you know how it feels to
be understood by someone? Tantric sex helps you worship
yourself and worship your partner. This does not mean that
you will blindly worship each other. It only means that you are
going to shower unconditional love on each other. This does
not mean that you have unconditional power on each other, but
it means you are serving each other in order to attain the
highest levels of ecstasy.

When you are following the path of tantric sex, you will find
that you love hearing good things about you and you will also
compliment your partner. This is what it means to be
worshipped as a god or a goddess.

Learning about the Gods and Goddesses

The male and female gods and goddesses have come from
different cultures – Egyptian, Greek, Roman and Indian. They
also have come from the modern times, but they are majorly
from the ancient era. Let us start with the goddesses.
Major and Well-Known Goddesses
Every goddess most often represents fertility. They are all
loving and nurturing. However, they are also often seen as
seductresses who are seen engaging their partners in sexual
intercourse. The main goddesses are mentioned in this section
of the chapter. You may find yourself attracted to them in
different ways.
Aphrodite
Aphrodite is the most famous Greek goddess of all time. She
represents sexuality, desire and beauty. She also portrays love
and friendship. She is often represented by doves, roses, and
dolphins and sometimes even the poppy. She is known as the
goddess Venus in Roman mythology. In Roman mythology,
she represents purity. She was created by the Romans to
ensure that the citizens of Rome do not practice sexual
intercourse.
Artemis
Artemis is the Greek Goddess of hunting. She is the virgin
goddess and represents the moon. She is a warrior and a
hunter. She is the female complement to Ares, the God of war.
Hindu goddesses
There are numerous goddesses in India and Nepal who have
been given immense importance. There are many ceremonies
that are conducted in different temples. The main goddesses
are:

Durga: She is known as the mother of all goddesses

Tara: She is the goddess who represents wisdom and
kindness
Laxmi: She is the goddess who represents wealth, prosperity
and happiness
Saraswati: She is the goddess who represents different art
forms
Kali: She is the goddess who represents strength and
immense power. She is also the protector.
Gods from Different Cultures
Every religion has gods just like goddesses. These gods are
often the counterparts of the goddesses. They come from
different cultures. They represent immense power, strength
and often are portrayed as super beings. This section covers
the most important gods from different religions. You may
find yourself attracted to them in different ways.
Hindu gods
The Hindu gods include Lord Shiva who represents immense
power while Lord Vishnu who is portrayed as the God of all
gods. There are other manifestations of Lord Shiva, which also
include his dark sides. Lord Shiva is worshipped in different
parts of Nepal and all over India. His consort is Shakti as
mentioned in the second chapter. Lord Shiva and Shakti form a
pair that has immense power and energy. The energy attained
by the two helps them attain enlightenment. A very popular
god is Ganesh. He is a young boy with an elephant head. He is
known to remove any obstacles and also spread kindness.
Greek gods
There are many Greek gods who have become famous due to
their power and strength. The greatest of all these gods is
Zeus, who is the king of all gods. He is a god with immense
power! He is the perfect alpha male! The other Greek gods
include:

Eros
He is commonly known as the Cupid in both Roman and
Greek mythologies. He is a little boy or a cherub who is
mischievous and often aims arrows of love at people around
him. He is the God of love!

Dionysus
He is the God in both the Greek and Roman myths, who has
indulged in lust. He is a person who always chased women
and indulged in drinking wine. He is the god of lust.
Chapter 7: Prepare Your Temple Of
Love; Your Body

The path of tantric sex proclaims that your body is the temple
of love. You have to ensure that you keep it healthy. You have
to be fit in order to attain higher levels of ecstasy. This chapter
gives you a few tips that you can use to keep your temple fit
and healthy.

There are certain yoga positions that you can use to help
facilitate the flow of energy in your body. The practices
mentioned in this chapter are of great importance since they
will help you channel and control your sexual energy.

We often take our body for granted. We do not worry about it

and do not realize that it is the bridge to attaining bliss. You
have to worship your body and treat it well in order to attain
high levels of ecstasy.
Building love for your body through the looking
glass
The most important part while preparing your body is to
remove any negative thoughts that you have about your body.
You have to view every part of your body and your private
parts and see how good they are. If you feel that you are fat,
you can tell yourself that you have curves. You must do this to
ensure that you have fun during sex and that you are able to
obtain pleasure.

Stand in front of a full – length mirror and remove your

clothes. If you prefer it, you can do it after a bath. Look at
every inch of your body. Start from your feet and continue
to look upward. Reach the top of your head and stop. If you
find yourself criticizing yourself, stop right there and give
yourself a compliment. If you have said, ‘My ass is fat’, you
can change that to, ‘I have a full and luscious ass’. You
should not worry about not telling yourself the truth. You
are only shifting the focus and bringing a positive reaction.
Move on to observing your private parts – your genitals.
You will have to focus on every aspect of them. You must
look at the colors, identify how they are shaped and also
observe the moistness in the areas. It is important that you
do this in order to be more confident.
Observe your first chakra that is located at the base of your
spine and the anal area. This is the chakra that provides you
with a notion of security. You have to sit down and observe
this area in the same way that you did with your genitals.
The connection between yoga and tantric sex
Yoga is one of the best methods to prepare your body. There
are many tantric masters who have also mastered yoga. They
have learnt these poses for years together to ensure that they
have a control on their body. If you practice yoga, you will be
able to control your mind and body. You will also be able to
control the movements in your body. You will be able to
achieve multiple orgasms and also control your ejaculations.
This will benefit your overall experience and also your health.
It also enhances the physical experience that you share with
your partner.
Simple yoga movements
This section covers a description of the simplest yoga
movements that you can perform alone! In the next chapter,
you will learn about different exercises that you and your
partner can perform together. These exercises will help you
become fit to perform any of the positions that you will come
across in Chapter 10.
The head lift.
Ensure that you are standing straight! Tilt your head towards
the sky. You should tilt it in such a way that a string from sky
was pulling it upward from your crown. Keep your mouth
closed. You have to inhale through your nose alone. When you
inhale, move your shoulder blades to the back like you are
forcing them to touch each other. Exhale and hold your feet to
the ground. It should feel like you have fixed yourself to the
ground. Relax your stance and repeat the process.
The cobra – pose.
Lie down comfortably on the floor. Extend your body and
ensure that your stomach is touching the floor. Place your
hands under your shoulders. Close your arms with your
elbows placed at the back. Lift your chest upward and move
your head to form a curve. Ensure that you are looking
upward. Relax your stance and repeat the process.
The cat – pose.
Once you have finished the cobra – pose. You should put your
head down, and slowly rise up on your knee. Stretch your
spine in the direction opposite from the direction in the cobra –
pose.
The resting – pose.
Once you have finished your cat – pose, you will have to move
back to the initial position of the cobra – pose. Stretch your
arms outward. Breathe freely. Ensure that your forehead is on
the ground and your chest is touching your knees.
The food you eat is what defines you
Food is what provides your body with energy, which is its fuel.
Hence it is essential that you pay close attention to the food
you eat. You know that foods with a lot of fat are unhealthy for
your body. You must never eat heavy meals since they affect
your digestive system. You must ensure that you eat healthy in
order to facilitate your journey on the path of tantric sex.

When you have a clogged drain at home, you will not have a
free flow of water. In the same way, if your digestive system is
clogged the flow of energy in your body is interrupted. You
will have to cleanse your body of toxins occasionally. You can
do this by eating raw fruits or going on juice fasts. But every
approach is not right for you. What works for one will not
work for another person. It is best to meet a nutritionist in
order to identify the perfect diet for your body. You must
ensure that this diet facilitates your journey.
Chapter 8: Exercising and Getting Fit
Together

In the last chapter, you had read about how it is important to

be fit physically in order to have pleasurable sex. Your body is
the temple of love. Only when you are fit will you be able to
share your body with your partner. The steps in chapter 5 help
you gain a certain level of fitness. However, this chapter
covers physical routines and movements that you can perform
along with your partner. These help in honoring your body
temples and are a lot of fun!
What is the importance of performing physical
activities together?
It has been proven that exercise is a type of aphrodisiac. A
national survey concluded that 8 people out of 10 felt that
exercising boosted their self – confidence, 4 out of 10 people
felt sexually aroused, and 3 people out of 10 made love very
often! Physical exercise helps in building strength and
endurance, which is beneficial when you are working on
sexual positions; it also helps in energizing you, which is
extremely important for sex; and also helps in increasing your
focus on your body and your partner’s, which helps in
increasing sensual awareness. Physical exercise also releases a
hormone in the brain that is released during sex.

When you work out with your lover, you will find that it pays
off immediately. Since you are exercising, you will have a
burst of adrenaline in your body. The love hormone –
endorphin - and the cuddle hormone – oxytocin – are both
released. This prepares your body to ensure pleasure during
sex and love.
Pelvic thrusts with your partner
The motions made by any person using the pelvic area
generate the most powerful sexual energy. You must first
perform these pelvic thrusts alone. Once you have learnt how
to do them well, you will be able to do them with your partner.
Play some music that is erotic and gets your blood to sing.
Stand facing each other. Once you are comfortable, you can
move around however you want to. Start thrusting at a low
height. Continue to thrust while you move from standing up to
lying down on your back. When you follow your mood, you
will be able to end up in an intimate position. You can make it
more fun by adding elements of surprise.

This sounds very simple does it not? You only have to thrust
your pelvis forward and backward. But this is not true. Most
human beings have a stiff pelvis and find it difficult to thrust.
Stand with your shoulders apart and tuck your sacrum in.
Thrust your hip forward and backward. Start slowly and
increase the pace. You have to keep your torso stiff and isolate
your hips. You will feel the energy surging through your body.
You must send the energy out to your partner. You can use
your hands to guide the energy to your partner from his pelvis
to his heart.
Tonight I’m going to dance with you
Have you always been conscious when you dance? Do you
rarely dance outside? But have you danced when you were
alone at home? Did you feel energetic? Did you find that your
body was active? Dancing is a brilliant exercise. You find
yourself freeing your spirit through dancing. When you dance
with your partner, you will be moving together which helps in
increasing the sexual energy in the body. You will be able to
get more interactive through dancing. You have to use the
movements in your dance to show your partner that you are
interested in him or her. You have to identify how you can
express your desire.

You will have to always pace your dance movements with

your heart rate. You will have to start with slow, sexy and
sensual movements and then move into fast paced movements.
You will have to let yourself go. Let your limbs move to the
music.
Bedroom Bodybuilding
Rundy Duphiney is a former professional athlete. He used to
work out every day to ensure that he would stay fit. He
stopped his workout when he had to travel cross-country to
meet his beloved, Lisa. He started panicking and worried that
he would not be fit. He later realized that he is working out
when he is with Lisa. He was making love, which is as good as
a workout. He then created a workout that helped him stay fit.
It is revolved around keeping men fit. However, the exercise
works both the man and the woman. This section covers the
basic steps of the workout.

Face your lover in either the bedroom or the shower. Look

into each other’s eyes begin to roll your head from one
shoulder to the next. Then stretch your body by leaning
towards the opposite direction. If your partner is moving
right, you will have to move left.
You will have to move your arms first in synchrony with
your partner. This has to be done while facing each other.
After rotating your arms, you must rotate your hips.
Once your partner is excited, if she is a woman, she will
have to turn her back to you and lean over to your body. If
you are a woman, you have to do this to your partner. The
man will have to guide the woman’s pelvis by moving it
towards and away from his body. This exercise ensures that
the woman is toning her thighs and hips while the man is
able to tone his stomach, thighs, glutes and hips.
The next step is the partner push up. The man has to lie on
his back and raise his hips into the air. He is working his
lower abs and back. The woman has to lean over him and
support herself with straight arms. She will then have to
move over him, by lowering and raising her body, as if she
is doing push – ups over him. This can be done next by the
man.
The next exercise is the simplest. The man must lie on his
back and prop his knees up. The woman must straddle the
man at his waist. The man must move his body upward and
clutch the woman’s buttocks and move her towards and
away from his penis. This is like performing a bicep curl.
Sit up in the yab yum position, which is explained in the
next chapter. The partners have to grab each other’s wrists
while the man is still inside the woman. They have to lean
backward slowly and stay in the position for a few seconds.
They will again have to pull each other up into the same
position. This has to be repeated for a minimum of 10
counts.
Chapter 9: Basic Tantric Positions And
Techniques

In this chapter we explain some basic tantric sex positions that

are great for beginners.
The sidewinder
Inspired by a yoga position of the same name, the sidewinder
is a technique that allows for deep penetration. It also allows
for great eye contact. To perform the technique, the girl must
lie on her side and support her upper torso with the help of her
hand. One leg is lifted and placed on the man’s shoulder with
the other lying on the bed. The man sits on his knew between
the two legs. An alternate is for the man to sleep behind the
girl and enter from behind. The girl’s position remains the
same.
The Yab Yum
Considered to be the best position for tantric sex, the yab yum
allows both parties to garner simultaneous orgasms. Although
fairly simple to perform, this position helps to hit all the right
spots. It also allows for the man’s hands to be free to do what
it wants to and the couple can kiss to glory. To perform this
pose, the man must sit with his legs crossed and maintain a
straight back. The girl sits on top of his legs and wraps her
legs around his lower back. Slow up and down movements are
made use of until both can reach a timed orgasm.
Time bomb
Also known as the get down, this technique allows the girl to
reach full penetration and is known as the best technique to hit
the g-spot. The pose also allows for easy kissing.
To perform this technique, the man must sit on a chair with
preferably a straight back. The girl sits on the lap facing the
man and lowers herself onto his lap. The girl can move herself
up and down or he can move her up and down by placing his
hands below her butt.
The padlock
This pose allows the man to have a good look at the girls face
and upper torso and vice versa. It makes for a very sexy pose
that helps pleasure both parties. To perform this technique, the
girl must sit on a high platform like a table or kitchen counter.
She must then lean back and balance her shoulder, neck and
head with the help of her elbows and arms. The man stands in
between the legs and enters. His hands are free to do whatever.
The butterfly
This technique is said to give both parties a high level of
ecstasy owing to its quality of helping with deep penetration.
To perform this technique, the girl must sleep on a table in
such a way that the butt lies at the very edge of the table. The
man must help the girl lift her lower back off of the table and
place her legs over his shoulders. How high the butt is lifted
depends on the man’s height. The man enters her with her butt
in mid-air. The girl must twist her neck a little backwards to
counter balance the pose.
The double decker
This pose is extremely sexy and will almost always garner an
orgasm. It allows the man a good view of what is going on
down there and also free hands to play with her butt. This is a
girl in charge pose. To perform this technique, the man must
sit on the bed with his folded legs beneath his body. The girl
faces the other way and places her feet on either sides of the
man with feet placed flat for support. The girl moves up and
down or forwards and backwards and the guy can do whatever
with his hands.
The hot seat
The hot seat is a great pose to help reel in the right amount of
pressure and give both parties an amazing sexual experience.
Both parties have equal control in this move. To perform this
pose, the man sits on the bed with his knees supporting his
upper body and lower legs place backwards and a little apart.
The girl sits in the same position but facing the other way and
her butt pressing against his scrotum and back against his
chest. Her legs are joined and placed in the space between his
legs. The man enters from behind. The pose calls for both
parties to stay as close as possible.
Row boat
The rowboat is a slight twist on the girl on top pose. This pose
helps position the bodies in such a way that both people can
have a good look at each-others sexy faces. To perform this
pose, the man sits on a chair that has the capacity of bending
backwards. The girl sits on his lap and places her legs on the
sides of the chair. The girl can move upwards and downwards
by herself or have the man lift her up and down by placing his
hands beneath her butt.
The mermaid
The mermaid is a changed version of the butterfly and allows a
tighter grip and a better comfort level. The pose allows the
man to play with the girl’s feet, which is seen as an amazing
erogenous spot. To perform this technique, the girl sleeps in
the same position as the butterfly but with a pillow placed
below her butt for support. Her legs are outstretched at a 90-
degree angle and the man stands very close to the table. The
joining of legs allows for an extremely comfortable and tight
grip.
Tidal wave
This pose is so comfortable and so sexy that it will blow your
mind. This pose is a slight role reversal where the girl mimics
the man’s pose from the missionary position. To perform this
technique, the man must sleep flat on his back with his arms
by his side.
The girl sleeps on top and inserts his penis inside her all the
way through. The girl must completely stretch out with legs
resting on his legs. The girl’s palms are placed on his forearm
for support. The girl moves her pelvic region upward and
downward in order to ride the man.
Lap dance
This pose allows the man a great experience. He has free
hands to do what he wants and has the girl facing his way. He
also has a good view of his sexy girl’s face. To perform this
pose, the guy must sit on a chair with his back straight. The
girl sits on his lap and balances the back of her upper thigh on
his stomach. She then lifts and places the backs of her calves
on his shoulder and leans back a little to place her palms on his
thighs. She jets out her chest to give him a clear view of her
breasts.
Pretzel
This pose is extremely aesthetically pleasing and simply
getting into this pose will make you two feel extremely sexy
about each other. To perform the technique, both of you must
sit face to face and kneel. You then close in and the girl wraps
her hands around the man. The girl lifts and places her left leg
with the foot facing downwards next to the man’s right foot
which must remain in its original pose and his left leg is place
near her right foot, which must remain in its original pose.
The spread
The spread is a rudimentary but an extremely sexy pose. It
allows the woman great pleasure as she gets to caress her man
and have him pleasure her. To perform the technique, the girl
must sit on the edge of a sofa or table and spread her legs. The
man stands in between her legs and enters her. She has his face
close to her to kiss and the man has his hands free.
The inter twine
This pose can look impossible to mimic but can be extremely
pleasurable if done correctly. The pose is extremely
aesthetically pleasing. To perform this technique, both sit close
to each other and face one another. The man’s must have his
legs placed on either side of the girl. The girl then lifts both
legs and places them on either side of his sides below his
under arms. His upper arms are supposed to lock the girl’s legs
in place. The girl must then lift her upper arms and place it
above his elbow. The man then lifts his legs and places it on
top of the girl’s hands. It might sound a bit tough but the pose
is guaranteed to reel in some good sex.
The G-force
Easily the hottest tantric sex pose, the G-force is a piece de
resistance. The man has control over the girl but both parties
derive amazing pleasure. To perform this technique, the girl
must lie with her back on the bed and the man must be by her
legs and kneel. He then lifts her lower torso off of the bed and
balances her with her shoulder and head on the bed. Now he
can either outstretch her legs to a 90-degree angle and enter or
pull them down and place her feet just below his chest.
Some more tantric sex positions
The Waterfall
The woman will have to place her hand on the man’s penis and
let her fingertips gently brush his scrotum. Making use of
lubricant is a good idea, as it will provide extra stimulation to
his scrotum. With your hands placed on either side of his
testicles, now slowly and gently slide up the hands till you
reach the tip of his penis. Once this is done, give the man some
time to cool down and ask him to reciprocate the same. The
man can cup the woman’s vagina and let the lube drip from his
hands. This would surely tickle your senses. He can slide his
hands over the clitoris and the pubic bone as well.

The serpent
The woman will have to slowly stretch the shaft of the man’s
penis with one hand and let the other hand make circles with
thumb and index fingers right under the penis head. Continue
these motions in a clockwise manner till the thumb reaches the
penis head and off it. Continue these motions for as long as the
man can endure it.

Tantric triangle of touch

The woman can lie on her back with her legs open and slightly
bent. The man will have to insert his index and middle fingers
inside her vagina and curl the fingers upwards so that he can
hit the G spot perfectly and provide the required stimulation.
The man will have to make a “come here” movement with the
fingers inside her vagina. This will surely make the woman
moan in pleasure. While doing this he also has to place his
other palm on the woman’s abdomen near the reach of the
clitoris. This forms the shape of a triangle and will provide
extreme pleasure to the woman. The combination of gentle
stroking of the G-Spot when combined with the slight pressure
on the pubic bone will definitely make the woman lose control
quickly.

The passion between you and your lover must have almost
reached a feverish pitch and the swells of pleasure you both
have been experiencing till now will ensure that your orgasm
is mind blowing. Remember to gaze into each other’s eyes to
stay in the moment and in sync with each other. The following
positions can be thought of as seismic climax positions,
definitely worth giving a try.
The Tantra X

In this position the man has to sit cross-legged and the woman
will have to kneel over his lap and should be facing him. Both
the lovers must be able to gaze into each other’s eyes. The
woman has to place her calves under the man’s knees and
while he is entering her, she can use her thigh muscles to
lower herself onto him and continue to move in this position as
slowly as you can. There is no need to rush. Keep both your
bodies as close to each other as possible and breathe in slowly.
You both should be able to feel the other breathe. The
advantage of this position is that you have the freedom to
caress each other, fondle and kiss. It provides unrestricted
access.
The seesaw
There is nothing innocent about this seesaw. It is extremely
erotic. The woman has to lie on her back with just her pelvis
being slightly titled. This can be done by making use of a
small pillow. The man has to lift her feet in a way that ensures
that her legs are folded and curled in, with her knees resting on
her breasts and her soles touching his chest. What this position
does is, it lets the man to hit your G-Spot every time he thrusts
into you. It lets him penetrate deeply and after all the foreplay
it is definitely bound to help you both combust in sexual
flames within no time.
These are the various basic and sexy tantric sex positions that
you can try with your partner and ignite a whole new level of
passion.
Chapter 10: Tantric Exercises

In order to add more leverage to the practice of tantric sex, you

can practice a few exercise and breathing techniques that will
help you add leverage to your sexual experience. These
exercises and breathing techniques are best practiced with
your partner but can also be done solo to bring in an element
of surprise for your partner.

The exercises can be classified as under:

Daily Exercise techniques
Breathing techniques
Daily Exercises
Shoulder stand
Shoulder stands are meant to help women assume the various
tantric poses with much ease but can also be practiced by men.
To perform a simple shoulder pose, the person must lie flat on
the mat or floor with legs stretched straight and hands by the
side. The person must then lift legs to a 90-degree angle with
the upper torso glued to the floor. The legs must be then lifted
a little higher with the lower back being lifted and the hands
placed behind for support. Practicing this technique helps with
a lot of the tantric sex poses.
Boat pose
The boat pose is again very helpful for women. To reform the
pose, the prison must sit with a straight back and legs out
stretched. The person then lifts legs to a 45-degree angle and
stretches the hands out wards to point the fingers towards the
feet. Maintain the pose for 3 minutes and release to return to
neutral.
Repeat 5 times.
Three legged dog pose
This pose helps in stretching the hamstrings, which are used
quite often during tantric sex. To perform the pose, the person
must sleep with the stomach flat on the mat and arms by the
side. The palms are then placed next to the chest and the feet
are lifted to be supported by the toes. The person must then lift
the body in such a way as to support the upper body and the
lower body by the toes. The body must create a triangle with
the floor forming the base and the body forming the side. The
rig leg must then be lifted upwards. Lift as per your comfort
level. Return to neutral and repeat with other leg.
Bridge pose
The bridge pose is good for both sexes. To perform the
technique, the person must sleep on their back and bend the
legs such that the knees point upwards. The feet must be
placed close to the butt. The lower torso must be lifted and the
hands can either stay by the side for support or be joined under
the lower torso. Repeat 5 times.

Kegels
Keels help women strengthen and tighten their pelvic floor
muscles. This helps tighten the grip and heighten the
experience for both parties. To perform this technique, the girl
must pull in the muscles that are placed inside the vagina and
release. The suction can last as long as is comfortable. The
exercise can be done just about anywhere and at any time.
Breathing techniques
Kapalbhatti
Kapalbhatti is a breathing technique that is great to perform
especially just before the man has an orgasm. The exercise can
also be practiced every morning in order to perfect it. To
perform this technique, the man must assume the lotus pose
and sit in an open-air setting. He must then take several fast
and sharp breaths that focus more on the exhale. The mouth
must be closed and the exhaling must create a loud sound. Do
about 3 sets.

Pranayama
Pranayama can be practiced by both sexes and helps assist in
the controlled breathing that takes place during tantric sex. To
perform the technique, a person must assume the lotus pose
and sit in an open-air setting. The person must then place the
right thumb on the right nostril; pressing it tightly to block the
airway, the pointing finger in the center of the forehead and
breath in through the left nostril and hold the breath for a
couple of seconds. Then the right nostril must be freed and the
middle finger must be pressed against the left nostril to block
it and the air must be exhaled through the right nostril.

For the next set, the air is inhaled through the right and
exhaled through the left.
Repeat 5 times.
Chapter 11: Some Quick Tantric Tips

Tantric sex is always about building up the sexual tension

between you and your partner and allowing yourselves to feel
the sensuality of the human body through every sensory
perception man has been blessed with. Once the arousal starts
building, you learn to ride the wave, and then control it so that
you draw out your orgasm to a point where the pleasure just
keeps building and building. Here are some quick, explicit
tantric tricks to get your libido going and build up that tension!

Get some aromatic oil – musk, sandalwood and jasmine are

particularly strong and exotic smells that are quick to arouse.
Lavender also works so does rose. Squeeze a couple of drops
onto your palms and rub them nicely to generate soft heat.
Then lean over to your partner and gently knead his/her skin
with the oil, moving up to their genitilia, without actually
touching their privates. Work around the area and squeeze the
muscles close to them, without laying a finger on the sexual
organs. This builds up tension.

Like I’ve said before, Tantra is about being aware of every

part of your body and using it to create pleasure. While the
tongue and your fingers are the most commonly used organs to
achieve this goal, there are other methods by which you can
tease and seduce your partner. Your nails, for instance, so long
as they are blunt, provide an excellent medium of feeling.
Women with longer nails can slowly trace the tip of the nail
down their partner’s skin, using it to create light pressure and
the suggestion of friction, which will increase arousal
exponentially. Another way to seduce is by using your breath
or a soft feather or flower. Once again, breathe down your
lover’s skin or trace the feather lightly down their body to
create arousal and draw it out without actually touching their
genitalia.
It’s not for nothing that nibbling on the ear has become a
romantic cliché! You would be surprised at how sensitive the
ear can be. Run your fingertip gently down the outer fold of
your partner’s ear, while blowing softly around the area. Be
sure not to breathe too fast or loudly – you don’t want to
damage their ear. Kiss the crease where the ear connects to the
head and gently prod the middle of the inner ear to create
arousal.

Even your foot can be extremely sensitive. Rub the soles of

your feet gently; you can even blow on it lightly. It’s a
universal fact that feet tend to be ticklish. Use that to your
advantage and make your partner laugh while still arousing
them sexually. Remember, tantric sex is meant to be as playful
and fun as it is meaningful – getting your partner to smile and
laugh will definitely deepen the intimacy between you. Use
your tongue and teeth to scrape across the sensitive skin – the
skin in between the toes can be especially sensitive for certain
people. Use that erogenous zone to the fullest.

Food also can act as an incredible aphrodisiac. Apart from

increasing your sex drive – like chocolate, which is a stimulant
and red wine – it adds an element of excitement to your
lovemaking. For instance, you can dip your finger in the wine
and then run it down your partner’s skin. Bend down to lick it
off with your tongue, tasting both the skin and the wine. You’ll
find your arousal building to a high peak. Feeding each other
food can also be incredibly arousing; those grape-feeding
clichéd images never go out of style! Share a chocolate
between yourselves, and I mean that literally. Out a bar of
chocolate in between your mouths and bite down gently,
chewing lightly until you can kiss your partner and taste the
chocolate on them instead of your own tongue.
All this leads up to building your sexual tension to a point
when you’re about to peak. When you feel like you’re going to
climax, and you want to prolong the pleasure, stop the
stimulation and back off, letting the touch fade away. Take a
step back from your partner and stop touching; maintain eye
contact though. You’ll find that your arousal peaks, and your
emotional connect becomes stronger. The more you stave off
your orgasm, the more the sexual tension builds up and the
longer you will last before having a mind-blowing orgasm.
The key is to stop when you feel like you’re going to reach
orgasm; stop touching and focus simply on breathing while
your body cools down.

Try out different positions and use different toys. For those so
inclined, try the Yoni or the Lingam massage. Yoni is the
Sanskrit word for vagina that is loosely translated as the
‘sacred temple’. Lingam, on the other hand, is the Sanskrit
word for penis, translated to mean ‘wand of light’. The
Lingam/Yoni massages are excellent activities to build up trust
and intimacy. Unlike normal penetrative sex, it implies getting
to know your lover’s body as well as you do your own. And it
also means allowing another person to touch, feel, taste and
feel those parts of yourself that are entirely your own an are
vulnerable. Obviously, it creates a form of intimacy and trust
that far exceeds normal sex, especially because orgasm is not
the primary goal here.

Here are the steps you can follow to render your partner
gasping with arousal by massaging their Lingam/Yoni
Lingam Massage
The goal of the massage is not to experience orgasm, but
simply surrender to a form of pleasure males are generally
unused to. This can serve as sort of sexual and spiritual
liberation. For so long, men have been conditioned into taking
the dominant, goal-oriented role. Here, you allow yourself to
face your softer, more receptive side, and feel incredible
pleasure from a non-traditional source.

The massage itself is rather simple. The receiver – the male –

lies on his back, with a pillow or a towel around the hips for
support. Keep your legs apart and spread out so as to provide
easy access to your Lingam. The giver uses the aromatic oil
we’ve discussed. Pour a few drops of the oil directly onto the
shaft of the Lingam and start gently massaging the testicles.
Make sure you don’t cause any pain – this area can be quite
sensitive. Rub in your hands in slow, deliberate fashion over
the scrotum, the pubic bone, the perineum and the anus.
Change your speed and pressure regularly and alternate your
hands to keep yourself from getting sore.

If it seems like your partner is about to ejaculate, stop

massaging and step back. Allow the Lingam to soften a bit
before resuming your massage. Repeat this several times –
remember the goal is not ejaculation, but overall pleasure and
intimacy. Deep breathing will allow both partners to
experience it in full.

The end of the massage may or may not be with ejaculation.

Allow your partner to dictate that. When he feels complete
with the massage and decides that it’s time to finish up, respect
his wishes and stop massaging. Gently cover him with your
hands, simply resting against him, and allow him to relax and
control his breathing. Then step back and remove your hands
unobtrusively. Your partner may choose to reciprocate in the
form of a Yoni massage.
Yoni massage
Once again, there is no need to achieve orgasm here. Simply
relax into the massage and focus on receiving the maximum
pleasure.

To begin with, the woman lies on her back, with pillows under
her head so as to meet her partner’s gaze. Keep your legs
parted, with knees lightly bent, allowing your partner full
access to your vagina. Both partners breathe in deeply.

Here, too, the oil comes into play. Pour a few drops right on
drop of oil on the mound of the Yoni, so that it drips down the
outer lips – this sensation can be more than a little arousing.
Gently massage around the outer lips, using slow and
deliberate strokes – do not rush. Squeeze the outer lip between
the index finger and the thumb, and slowly move to touch the
inner lips. Make eye contact with the receiver and vary the
speed and pressure of your strokes. Note your partner’s body
language to see what she likes and dislikes.

Gradually work your way upward to touch the extremely

sensitive clitoris. This little organ – holding 6000-8000
sensory nerve endings is more sensitive than any other part of
the human body and is where all her sexual pleasure
originates. Stroke the ‘clit’ in circular motions, before
squeezing it gently. Your partner’s breathing will no doubt
increase, so slow your movements and allow her to regain
control.

As you stroke the clitoris with your left hand, use your right to
gently insert the middle finger into the Yoni opening. Keep to
the left and right pattern; it has to do with polarity in Tantra.
Explore and massage the inside of the Yoni with your right
middle finger; curl it back toward your palm in ‘come here’
gesture. You will feel a spongy tissue just under the pubic
bone that will render her speechless – this is the infamous G-
spot. Remember, the aim is to massage and pleasure, not get
your partner off, so once again, if you feel that she’s going to
climax, back off. If she does climax, gently hold her through
it and begin massaging again if she so wishes.

Once again, the receiving partner dictates the end of the

massage. If she wishes to stop, respect what she wants, and
gently place your hands on top of her mound, allowing her to
feel the heat of your hands. Make sure to look up at her and
meet her eyes. Let her relax in the afterglow and regain her
breathing.

Both the Lingam and the Yoni massages are more than a little
arousing and allow for an emotional intimacy to develop
between the two partners. Another idea that has become a
time-tested cliché to build this kind of deeper connect is post-
coital cuddling. Here, both partners just relax into each other,
holding one another comfortably. Synchronize your breathing
and listen to the sound of your heartbeats – what you’re doing
is feeling the life and the cosmic energy you’ve expended in
sex pulsing beneath your veins.

At the very least, cuddling involves some kind of emotional

trust and bonding, even if you don’t believe in the tantric
philosophy of universal and sexual energy.
Tantric sex tips to be kept in mind

Well, we all want to have mind-blowing sex! Don’t we? And I

am sure that a lot of people must be wondering if all that they
have heard about tantric sex is true or not. Tantric sex is
indeed about mind-blowing orgasms; massages that are mind
altering and it can change your life for the better. So, it would
do you good if you stop day dreaming about better and more
satisfying sexual interactions and should instead make use of
certain tried and tested techniques of tantric sex that can help
you achieve what you want, and more.

How many of you have watched the movie American Pie or

read the erotic encounters in Mills and Boons? Most of us
would have come across these things at one point of time or
another. Tantric sex is all about eroticism and it is about
prolonging the feelings of sexual bliss to attain a higher level
of both fulfillment and intimacy. You can think of this ancient
art in eroticism as a relay of erotic encounters instead of a 100
meters dash. Now, let me get to a slightly weird concept about
this, it is not really about achieving mind blowing orgasms. In
fact orgasms are just a much appreciated by products. Tantra is
all about shifting the focus from physical relief and focusing
on awakening all your sexual senses. When you can tap into
all your other senses, the physical relief just becomes more
intense.

Most of the couples might shy away from all the effort that
needs to go into it in the form of meditation and abstaining for
a long time, so here are a few tips that might come in handy
for you.

Trick#1: Eye contact

This might sound pretty basic and obvious to some extent. But
it really does help make your sexual experience more
pleasurable, enjoyable and intense. Looking at your partner
while engaged in any sexual act will definitely make the
experience more intense. When I say eye contact, I don’t mean
that you should stare wistfully into the eyes of your partner.
Move over the longing look a love struck puppy has in its
eyes, we are talking about some serious X-rated gazing, so get
ready for it. This way will definitely help you attain some
extra intimacy. For getting started you and your partner can
find a comfortable spot to sit so that you both will be able to
look into each other’s eyes. Take a moment to gather your
concentration; usually a deep breath will do the trick. Once
you feel that you are ready, you can open your eyes and gaze
into those of your partner. Allow your partner the access to see
you, your true self, and in the same manner you can gaze at
them. This might feel a little stupid initially, but trust me when
I say that this little trick is extremely effective. And this trick
provides you the liberty to incorporate it whenever you want
to.

Eye gazing needn’t mean that you and your partner just sit and
stare at each other; you can incorporate this into foreplay. Or
you might as well take out five minutes from your everyday
schedule to practice this with your partner. You will fall in
love with each other over and over again, not just this but even
your love making will be much hotter.
Eye contact might be one of the simplest things that you can
do o help improve your sex life, so why not just give it a
whirl? The results might pleasantly surprise you.

Trick#2: Touch
Tantra is very sensual in nature and the whole [pint of this
ancient art is to allow you the power to explore the sensuality
of not just your partner but even yourself with teasing and
strain. What would probably be more sensual than being able
to touch each other? One of the key elements of tantra is the
stress it outs on touch. Tantra is all about making each of the
touches count. Touch is an essential manner in which we
communicate with others. And in the same manner you can
communicate with your partner through touch. If you are
preoccupied about your work, chores or a million other things,
then your touch will feel vacant and distant. And a touch of
this sort will not be of much help.

Usually with all the couples these days, their tensions and
worries from work seem to piggyback home with them. With
all the constant stress, getting into a sensual mood to ignite the
spark of sexual activity might get really difficult. The tricks
mentioned here hardly take any time or effort. And these have
been tried, so the results will be pleasing indeed. Touch needs
to conscious; your touch should be able to convey to your
partner what exactly is that you need from them. This will not
just make your sexual intercourse more exciting but it will also
build your sexual appetite. You should not just be aware of
where and how you are touching your partner, but you should
also be able to convey your intention to your partner.

Trick#3: Exploration of your senses

Tantra is an ancient art that has been around for centuries. It is
essential to remember that tantra is not just about improving
the quality of your physical intercourse but it is also about the
emotional experience. Even your various sensory organs take
part in the process of having sex. So, tantra is also about
improving the experience of all your senses, touch, sight,
smell, taste and sound. It has been proven that once any of
your senses has been compromised, the rest become more
sensitive.
You can use this as an inspiration and probably make use of it
experience sex with your partner in a manner that you have
never tried out before. It is not just essential that you are
participating in the intercourse, but it is also important that you
are able to explore all the senses of your partner. You both
should be able to create an atmosphere that is conducive of
this, an environment that can ignite your sexual fires.

Don’t try too hard, just focus on creating an environment that

is relaxing, intimate and sensual. You might even try
blindfolding your partner; this will help stimulate their other
sensory organs. For tantalizing their olfactory receptors you
can make use of vanilla extracts or even essential oils. Maybe
play some music they enjoy or if you want to take a more
romantic route maybe read out a poem to them. If not reading
an erotic story might be a good idea too. Coming to their sense
of taste, you can try feeding them such luscious berries or even
chocolate, try licking off some whipped cream from their
fingers. For arousing their receptors responsible for identifying
touch, you can tease them their body by caressing them with
silk or even feathers. Let your imagination run wild. Once you
have teased all their senses, you should remove the blindfold
and let them see what you have been up to and surely your
partner would not miss the look of passion and desire in your
eyes. It might sound a little drawn out, but the results will be
worth the effort that you put into it.

Trick#4: Aim for a full body orgasm

Who doesn’t want to have an orgasm, and the sound of full
body orgasm might seem more than tempting. So without
wasting any time, let me explain the concept of a full body
orgasm. One manner in which you can condition your body to
have a full body orgasm is by practicing the build up to an
impending orgasm and then letting it subside without getting
yourself off. This means that you will have to drive your
partner to the brink of an orgasm and then let it fade away.
Once you let it subside, you will have to build it up again and
let it fade away again. Use your willpower and keep playing at
it for as long as you can and like.

You can take your partner to the brink of an orgasm orally or

through any other method, but you should not give them the
relief they want, at least not for a while anyways. Keep
building up on this pleasure. Because once you do let go of it,
the orgasm your partner will achieve will be nothing short of
spectacular.

Trick#5: The journey counts

Orgasms are brilliant, but Tantra is not just about achieving
orgasms, it is about delaying your orgasm for a while to
achieve results that will help you attain a higher level of sexual
awareness of not just yourself but your partner as well. It is
understandable that the fun of engaging in sexual intercourse
might be taken away by the stress of having to achieve a
pleasurable result. This stress is not a good thing and it will
have a negative impact on a person’s performance. Enjoy the
journey; it is as important as the end result itself. And Tantra
will help make this a fun activity again. If you keep running
behind the aim of achieving only an orgasm, it is highly likely
that you might just bore your partner and you both might get
stuck doing the same thing over and over again. Try enjoying
the process of having sex. Try focusing on things that you
enjoy and also the things that your partner enjoys. There will
certainly be certain things that you both enjoy. Find those
common things; it might be kissing, foreplay, holding each
other or any oral activity. Explore the likes and fantasies of
your partner. The results will be truly favorable.
Some more tricks to keep in mind
The thigh high
Select any of your favorite scented oils and squeeze a few
drops of it in your hands. Now place these well-oiled palms on
your partner’s thigh, a little above their knees. Start kneading
gently, the way you would be wringing your towel. Now make
your way northwards, but slowly. Let the anticipation build
along with the sweet sexual tension. When you finally reach
the area near the groin, do not actually touch your partner’s
genitals; instead work the muscles surrounding this region.
Take the nail road
Use your nails and trace patterns of figure eight on your
partner’s inner thigh and run your nails along the length of
their calf and thighs. Try tickling the arch of their foot; it is
very sensitive to touch. Try changing the pressure slightly and
keep them guessing.
Try the aural sex rub
Try massaging your partner’s ear, but do it very gently with
fleeting touches. Use your fingers and work the outer fold of
the ear and make your way downward. Run your little or your
pinkie finger along the crease of their ear, the point where this
point joins their head. Now let us build the anticipation a little
more and you can gently lick the inner ear with your tongue,
prod slightly.
Now, turn up the heat
Now it is time to turn up the heat. There are different ways in
which this can be done. One easy method would be to slip
either some luscious berries or even chocolate back and forth
between you and your partners while kissing. You need to
include things that would tantalize their sense of taste and
touch as well. You can try spilling some champagne and let it
bubble down their body while you are licking it off. Even
some whipped cream would come in handy.
After these steps, you and your partner must be overflowing
with sexual anticipation. And this is where the principle of
tantra, to build anticipation and cool it down, comes into
picture. It is all about working up the build of sexual arousal to
the brink of an orgasm and then letting it fade away. You have
to drive your partner to the peak of pleasure and let it subside.
You can do this multiple times. Keep doing this till you both
can handle it. The more the sexual tension is the more
satisfying the relief will be. The longer you make it last, the
climax is going to be that much better. Don’t think about
gratifying yourself immediately. Instead focus on making the
journey last longer. Let yourself go to the brink of an orgasm,
but don’t let go just yet. Wait for a while and then when you
do let go, the orgasm will literally take your breath away.
Chapter 12 The Link between Kabala
and Tantra

The Sri Yantra

It is quite a little known fact that Kabala and Tantra are
actually very closely linked. Even though this book is about
Tantra and its relation to sexuality, I would like to point out
that Tantra isn’t just sex or stuff related to sex even though that
is the popular opinion in most Europeans.

Tantra is, in fact a complete system of spirituality. This system

can be traced back to thousands of years ago in Northeast
India. In fact, the more popular concepts of Chakras, as well as
Kundalini, is that it is regarded as a branch of astrology also
evolved from ancient forms of Tantra. Apart from these many
healing techniques such as Acupuncture, Vastu (which is the
source of Feng Shui), martial arts and many more can be
credited to Tantra. Tantra has a complex system based on
philosophy, rituals, divination techniques, deities as well as an
entirely unique approach to the Divine. And like any other
complete system of belief and spirituality, such as Judaism,
Islam, Buddhism, etc. Tantra too has ideas about sexuality.

Tantra first came to the West in the late 19th century. This is
why it was seen as a bit of a sexual reprieve because this was
also the Victorian period, one of the most infamous periods
regarding sexual repression. However, this did not mean that
the Victorians were shy of discussing other peoples’
sexualities. Because of their depravations, they found their
solace in the sexual aspects of Tantra. Many historians have
compared this to buying a brand new house and only talking
about its roof. Tantra is very vast and much more than simple
sex.

Tantra and Kabala aren’t so much different from each other. In

many books, a lot of experts have explained how Kabalah
resembles certain Hindu schools of thought such as the Shiva-
oriented paths that the early Tantra also follows. Additionally,
a lot of scholars, though they’ve shied away from blatantly
saying that Judaism and Tantra have anything in common,
have implied that even though Tantra predates Judaism, both
have had some sort of communications whilst evolving due to
a lot of similarities in them especially in the department of
spirituality.

It is not exactly surprising that many people belonging to

Kabala or the followers of any magical path would study
Tantra due to its close connection with spirituality. However,
the problem is that a lot of the books on Tantra available in the
west seem to focus on sex with regard to Tantra and not on the
complete ancient spiritual traditions of the magic.

In the Western esoteric practices, there are a lot of wholes

regarding the practices and what role they might have in the
development of the subtle and not so subtle bodies of the
people who are practicing the exercises. In the East, all
practices are designed to awake the semi-dormant energy that
is asleep in a person’s body until it has been awakened. This
energy is known as Kundalini, the serpent fire as well as the
dragon, varying per custom and tradition according to where
you might live. The difference between the Kundalini,
Kabbalah as well as the Tantra and the Western idea of each of
these is the fact that there is years, decades and even centuries
worth of dedication and research behind the first set as
compared to the practices as they are practiced in the West.
Extreme care has been taken, despite contradictions between
systems, to chart the effects of exercises on this latent energy,
and how it ‘flows’ through the physical, emotional, and
psychic body, at what stages, and in relation to which
exercises. Such a detailed analysis is lacking in modern
Western esotericism.

For modern kabbalists, the most common introduction to

ceremonial magic is through the Lesser Ritual of the
Pentagram and the Middle Pillar Exercise. In this chapter you
will learn about the aspects of the fire that can be burnt in
one’s sexual life through these means of magic: to show how
this, and related exercise can stimulate the Secret Fire, and to
suggest exercises for its regulation by esoteric students who
are engaged in a Hermetic path, such as general studies or
alchemy, who may have experienced its awakening and are in
need of simple and direct exercises for its regulation.

The Similarities Between the Middle Pillar and

Tantric Sex
There are many different variations of the middle pillar
exercise. However, the basic fundamentals of all of these are
the same. It does not matter if you go in search for scriptures
or turn to the more popular books as have been written by
modern scholars in order to perform the Middle Pillar
exercises.

Theoretically speaking, Kabbalah tells us about the secret fire

that burns within us all and that the Middle Pillar is the belief
in the fact that this fire can be unleashed to purify the vital
energy that holds this secret fire via imagination, breath,
concentration and willpower. When we start to indulge and
practice Middle Pillar exercises, our psychic centers are
cleansed of emotional, moral as well as materialistic residue so
that they can act as a sort of clean mirror that reflects the
cosmic energy that flows through them freely. The Middle
Pillar has a pre-described pattern of circulating energy that
smooths out the edges of our auras and increases the flow of
energy in our body so that rather than merely living in this
realm, our psychic pathways, both big and small can be
purified so that the vital energy can flow and fuel the secret
fire that burns within us and fuels our sexuality.

The pathways as they are described in the middle pillar are in

the form of a circle. They are large, bright and clear with a
reflective surface. They can be compared to brilliant shining
diamonds in the sun. This diamond, at the center of the aura is
the source of the radiating heat and light that fuels our secret
fire.

The beauty of the Middle Pillar is that it, like many esoteric
practices, is really a layered exercise. Containing an almost
infinite amount of flexibility and growth potential. As the
practitioner develops in skill and manipulation of the imagery,
the amount of new possibilities increases.

A middle pillar exercise that helps cleanse us of

impurities and increases sexual energy
This exercise is known as the Fountain of Light. In order to
achieve this, sit in a calm, quiet place and imagine a brilliant
force of energy that enters through the soles of your feet and
forces its way out the top of your head. This was the first step.
Next, focus on returning this energy back to your feet as you
feel yourself getting engulfed into its circle. You may feel
yourself a rock getting honed by the hand of God himself as
your aura is sanded and its rough edges are smoothed over so
that you may enjoy a better sex life.

If you continue with this exercise, you will feel your libido
increase dramatically in a short amount of time. Your sex life
will improve and so will your stamina and your pleasure.
Chapter 13 The Science behind Tantric
Sex

Go back in your mind and try to remember if you have ever

felt a moment of supreme sexual ecstasy? How did it make
you feel? Did you feel exhilarated? Did you feel as if though
you were deeply connected to the earth or your partner based
on this experience of sex? Such intense sexual experiences are
our greatest sources of pleasure.

At the same time, sex is considered to be something that is

equally fascinating and fear inducing in many people. We
might want to indulge in sexual intimacy with all our heart but
at the same time we might be avoiding it like the hounds of
hell. We might wish to be touched but we might fear the
vulnerability that comes along with that package. Similarly,
we may want to rekindle lost passions but we might have
forgotten how to set that lost spark aflame so that it would
satisfy us like we want it to.

The practices of Tantra show us how to reclaim that sexual

intimacy that we seem to have lost somewhere along the way.
Though this might be one of the most ancient of arts, we will
discover new joys of the erotic pathways and will expand
those fleeting moments of sexual ecstasy into a lifetime’s
worth of sexual bliss.

It is truly beautiful how the old and somewhat lost art of

Tantra still shines like a beacon for those who wish to reclaim
control of their lives at a time when the stresses, fears and
distractions of daily life threaten so many relationships daily.
The age-old practice of Tantra teaches us how to open our
hearts, our emotions and our sexuality as well.

What Is Tantra?
Tantra is not a new phenomenon in Eastern cultures. However,
its introduction to the West and especially the United States is
relatively new. The origins of Tantra can be traced back
thousands of years before the Common Era in India. It was
originally introduced as a rebellion of sorts against Hinduism
that posited, the way so many religions do, that sex was the
route to evil and must be avoided in order to obtain
enlightenment.

Tantra challenged these beliefs and emphasized that instead of

taking one away from enlightenment, sexuality was actually a
doorway that led straight to the divine itself. Tantra held that
earthly pleasures such as eating, dancing and creative
expressions were acts of great sacredness.

The word Tantra means ‘to manifest, to expand and to show’.

When it is held into a sexual context, this means that sex
expands consciousness and weaves and brings together the
polarities of the male and female body into one whole
harmonious unit.

Many couples worry that they have to ascribe to the Tantric

school of thought in order to apply the sexual techniques that
this ancient art has to offer but their worries are needless as
this is most certainly not the case. Tantric sexual practices can
be applied to help you to prolong sex and to make your
orgasms more intent. Just the positions and breathing
techniques are enough; the rest is if you really want to get into
those beliefs.
Tantra is also very good for one’s health. Quite a few doctors
have emphasized that sexual energy is one of the most
powerful energies for creating and recreating lost health.

By practicing such techniques and indulging in tantric sex, we

can tap into our own personal fountains of youth and vitality.

How Is Tantric Sex Unique?

In the western world, sex is viewed more as a source of
recreation rather than a means of transformation, The goal
may be to reach orgasm and relief some feelings and cravings
momentarily rather than to pleasure one’s lover and especially
to connect with them more fully. In short, where the Western
notion of sex is greedy and only seeks personal satisfaction
and fulfillment, Tantric sex teaches a person to indulge into the
act as one part of a machine that needs both in order to work.
Tantric sex teaches us that we are, in fact, not separate from
our lover but that we are both one part of a two-piece set.

Beginner Tantric Sex Techniques and their Relation

to Scientific Intimacy
The type of lovemaking we practice in the Western world has
a very distinctive start and finish, with a climax for the woman
being preferred but certainly not necessary. This type of love
making lasting, at most, fifteen or so minutes. This is a very
sad scenario for women who can take as much as 20 minutes
to reach a state of arousal and thus cannot benefit from this
type of lovemaking fully and has to remain unsatisfied more
often than not.

Now when we compare the sex model of the western world

with that of tantric sex, the sexual experience in this situation
is seen as a dance that has no set beginning or end. There is no
goal or finish line that one has to reach. Tantric sex is living in
the moment in the truest sense of the world for the sake of a
divine and exquisite union. This is why Tantric lovemaking is
meditative, expressive and intimate to the highest degree.
Tantric sex also deals beautifully with the problem of
immediate arousal post climax that is most common in men
and makes sure that love can be extended to such a peak of
sexual ecstasy that both a man and woman can experience
several orgasms during a single session of sex.

Tantra as a Cure for Premature Ejaculation

Experts and sages of Tantra posit that tantric sex can be used
to cure premature ejaculation. Doctors that practice modern
medicine in the west also hold this belief. Men suffering from
premature ejaculation can use tantric techniques to delay their
orgasm. Advanced tantric practitioners can even have several
orgasms within a single session of sex!

Though there are many advocates of Tantra, the most famous,

perhaps, is the musician Sting who attributes his fulfilling
sexual life to Tantra. It’s no surprise that even the best of the
best use this ancient art that takes away insecurities and instills
feelings of love, trust and mutual respect into a person and
their partner. Tantra is a befitting act for people of all ages and
levels of sexual experience.

The following exercises are scientifically proven to help you

reconnect with your body; align it as one with the universe as
well as to connect with your partner in the most intimate and
profound of fashions. Remember that while practicing Tantric
sex, your ultimate goal is not to reach orgasm or go through
the steps of intercourse as a chore. Instead, your goal is to lose
yourself into the intimacy of the act until you feel your very
core beginning to open up and start overflowing with energy
and love and you feel every pore of your being begin to
breathe as your body finally gets satisfied in the ways it had
been wanting to since long before you even realized.

Enjoy the act of giving and receiving pleasure in such ways

and use a gentle touch and loving words all the while.

Remember that the best part of Tantric sex is that you do not
have to meet with any set expectations. This opens the doors
to communication and you can try to discover, both of you
together if need be, what your partner finds most arousing.

Try and communicate with your lover for a long time, spend
multiple weeks simply indulging in the Tantric Intimacy
Exercises without feeling the burden to do something.
Practicing such an intimacy act without the pressure to go all
the way helps to relieve sexual guilt for all partners and helps
to build trust and sexual desire fully.

Though there is a whole section in this book that is dedicated

to sexual intimacy and tips regarding tantric sexual tips, here
are some tips that have been scientifically known to trigger
sexual desire and better tantric sex on the whole as well.

Set Aside Time For Your Significant Other Each

Week
No matter how much you might indulge into each other on a
daily basis, plan at least one sexual rendezvous per week. Plan
and specify an hour at least to be alone and together with your
significant other. You will face many distractions along the
way such as your children and work, etc. but you need to
remember that you will not be able to benefit from Tantra if
your relationship is not of the utmost priority to you.
Work on the Atmosphere
It will not matter if you plan on indulging in your kitchen,
dining room or any other room in your home. All that matters
is that you treat the space as sacred as you treat your partner.
Give the atmosphere importance and it will work in your favor
too and you will feel relaxed and in the moment much more
easily. Additionally, candies, flowers, art, music, aromatherapy
candles and small food items that you both like can transform
any room into a temple of sexual delight. Some people like to
introduce sex toys into the play too and if done respectfully
with both partners consent, they can help to take sex to
newfound heights. Even something as simple as dimming the
lights and playing erotic music can help to create a welcoming
environment.

Focus on your dress

This is a very wide berth where you can play, as you like. You
can dress provocatively or you can even opt for wearing
nothing at all. Remember that this is mainly done to excite
your partner and you can wear accessories that you might feel
will excite them.

The Exercises
If you feel that you cannot achieve a level of intimacy deep
enough to let you indulge in tantric sex to the fullest, here are
some intimacy exercises that can help you reach your aim of
supreme ecstasy.

Assign a Ritual
Sometimes, you might not be feeling spontaneous. For a lot of
people, sex needs to be in a series of steps that are in the form
of a ritual because it gives them a sense of knowing as if they
are in a secure place. If that is the case with you, start your
session with a regular activity that is ritualistic in nature.
This might consist of anything. Be it a simple act of feeding
each other some food you both enjoy or having a nice relaxing
drink when you are both not wearing clothes. A lot of couples
enjoy indulging in an aromatherapy bath as it helps them to get
intimate. This is a good way to get close to your partner. Water
is a great relaxant and it is also, surprisingly, a drink that has
some serious sexual potency.
Take care and time to wash each other with love. Be gentle or
as vigorous as you see your partner is being with themselves.
Giving each other a back rub is also useful and it fuses your
energies. Some couples enjoy reading to each other as well.
You can also try to play some music or simply put it on and
dance it to it in order to get the both of you more comfortable.
Use your time together as if it were your last time together and
communicate with them. Share what you love about each other
and leave past grievances aside. The whole purpose of this is
to allow you and your partner to make each other feel special
and loved.
Don’t worry if getting intimate is taking you a lot of time. The
whole point is to make the lovemaking about you, rather than
turning it into a mechanical way to sate your sexual desires. It
is actually quite common for sexual partners to try out several
different sex rituals over a period of weeks before they achieve
the appropriate level of intimacy.
One piece of advice to keep in mind is that there is no way to
gauge if you two are ready to have sex. At a certain point, the
intimacy will have reached a level that you will just know, and
within moments you will be in the throes before you know it.

Breathing Exercises
How many times a day do you actively breathe while thinking
about it? Probably not a lot of times unless you’re actually
having trouble doing so in the first place. However, in Tantric
sex, breathing is a very important part of the sex. Applying
tantric breathing techniques can also allow you to remove any
distracting thoughts from your mind so that you can focus on
your lover.

Here is a breathing exercise for you to try

Sit quietly and cross your legs and face your partner who
should be sitting in the same position. Place your hands lightly
on your legs wherever it is comfortable. Just make sure that
the palms are facing up.
Meet your partner’s gaze and softly inhale and exhale. Do not
close your eyes, but look into your partner’s eyes. It is said
that the eyes are the windows to the soul, and there is a good
reason that this saying holds so much weight.
Next, begin to actively breathe by thinking about your
inhalations and exhalations. Match your partner’s speed of
breathing but try to keep it as slow as is comfortable.
Remember to inhale through your nose and exhale through
your mouth, and keep looking her in the eye while you
synchronize your breathing patterns. Once you have breathed
as one for about ten or so minutes, it is time to begin the next
tantric practice.

Erotic Touching
Try out different types of sensual touching in order to help
your partner and yourself appreciate each other. If not for sex
itself taking the top spot, erotic touching would surely be the
primary activity that humans engage in because it is so
effective. In many ways it is even more effective than sex
itself because hands are more deft and agile!
Keep your partner going by offering encouragement. A great
way to do this is to ask your partner to touch your erogenous
zones. A woman would probably not know that the head of
your penis is extremely sensitive and should be touched more,
and you probably don’t know just how much your partner
would love it if you touched her clitoris. Just make sure that
you ask your partner politely but affectionately (unless of
course your partner would like to be commanded!) and
remember to let your partner know that they are doing a good
job, even if it is by moaning a little louder or being more into
the sex itself.
Once the two of you have attained a suitable level of comfort,
you can take a box and turn it into your little treasure trove of
sexual plunder. In this box you can keep whatever you think
would turn you on and would help you make the sex more
interesting. Blindfolds, handcuffs, sex toys, whips,
pornography, absolutely anything that you feel would be good
for you and your partner during sex should go into this box.
This will help both of you become more honest about your
sexual preferences and will allow you to associate good sex
with this box. This association will accentuate the sex because
you will be immediately aroused upon seeing it.
Now you are more or less ready to start your own sexual
adventures. Lose yourself into each other and you will be fine.
Explore exciting and adventurous ways to fall in love and
explore each other’s minds and bodies. This is the last step to
Tantric lovemaking.

Basic Sex Techniques

You have already judged the importance of preparation before
tantric lovemaking. Remember that the sexual activities such
as I emphasized above are especially important because their
main objective is to allow the two of you to exchange the
pleasure that you derive from sex and heighten your senses so
that your arousal and emotional connection are that much
more potent.
During these exercises, your body was establishing a personal
intimacy with your partner. This will only be heightened as
you both transition into a more deeply sexual connection.
Sensual exercises meant to improve your emotional
connection can be perceived as a form of prolonged foreplay.
This helps the bodies to start anticipating the lovemaking that
is about to ensure and thus hone them so that they get ready
not only for sex but for Tantric sex as well.
Just keep in mind during your lovemaking that there is
absolutely no way that you can do this wrong. If there is one
thing that Tantra does not dictate, it is what is the correct or
incorrect way to perform its techniques. All that matters is that
you communicate and enjoy yourselves. Tantra is all about
pleasure after all!
During your lovemaking, bear in mind that you are the
ultimate controller of your sexual ecstasy. You can maintain
yourself for practically as long as you want to, and the only
real thing that you need to achieve is an intense climax for
both yourself and your partner.

Remain intimate
Do not break eye contact for as long as you can maintain it
without your eyes or watering or starting to laugh. This will
heighten the intensity of your arousal because looking into a
partner’s eyes releases pleasure chemicals such as serotonin
and dopamine in your brain. Remind each other that you are
loved and wanted.

Take it slow
Taking your time is the essence of tantric sex. Try not to
climax for as long as possible, don’t climax until the orgasm is
practically tearing you up inside, then simply let it go and lay
back as the waves of pleasure crash over you!
Additionally, this will allow you to give your woman all the
time she needs to achieve her own climax. Just remember,
conserve your sexual energy for as long as possible by
postponing ejaculation, and keep your eyes locked with hers
for as long as possible.
Regulate your breathing
Try your best not to breathe too fast, for this might make you
achieve orgasm quicker than you want to. Try to synchronize
your breathing with that of your lover by inhaling when she
does and exhaling at the same time as well. You can also
switch by inhaling as she exhales or vice versa. This creates an
incredibly seesaw of energy that would take you to
unimaginable sexual heights!

Try out new positions

An excellent way to even the score between your masculine
and her feminine energy is to give a couple of new positions a
try. If you are dominant, you can try to be submissive to your
lover for one session. Try to break down the sexual barriers
you have created for yourself!
Chapter 14 Tantric Sex and Men’s
Multiple Orgasms

One very important aspect of tantric sex is that it posits that

climaxing during sex is not the same as ejaculating. If you are
prone to feeling empty and unsatisfied even after you
ejaculate, you might not be experiencing an orgasm. Hence, it
is not necessary for a male to ejaculate in order to experience
the sexual pleasures of an orgasm.

By applying methods of orgasm control that are present within

tantric philosophy, you will be able to experience multiple
orgasms and even orgasms that last incredibly long amounts of
time.

A particular tantric technique that you might be interested in

would allow you to orgasm for several hours at a time.
However, before you are able to achieve this level of tantric
sexual prowess, you are going to have to practice orgasm
control within the confines of tantric philosophy.

This is a form of skimming the waters without actually going

inside for a swim. There are three strategies that can help you
to do this:

Get ready to Kegel

The pubic muscles, which are essentially the muscles in your
groin, are the muscles that control your sex. They are basically
included in the muscles you’d use to hold it in if you have to
pee. Strengthening these pubic muscles to a certain degree can
allow you to control your orgasm, and the most efficient
method of strengthening these muscles is to do kegels.

Kegels are very basic exercises that do not require you to put
in any extraordinary effort. Simply clench your pubic muscles
around two dozen times before or after each meal. However,
remember not to go overboard with this exercise.

After a few weeks of regularly performing this exercise, try to

prolong the length of time during which you hold the squeeze.
Initially go for two to three seconds per squeeze, but your
ultimate goal should be about ten seconds per squeeze. This
exercise will help you prolong your orgasm and will also keep
you from climaxing too soon.

Keep your cool

This may sound odd to you, but the best thing you can do to
prolong your sex is to stay calm. If an orgasm starts coming on
before you want it to just slow down your breathing and stop
thrusting.

Keep in mind that this might cause some awkwardness

between you and your partner, so make sure that you keep
communicating. Don’t be shy, just let her know that you are
trying not to come and she will understand. After all, the
longer you last before you have an orgasm, the longer she has
to build up to your orgasm!

Take it slow
When you begin to have sex with your lover, remember to take
it slow at first. The slower the sex is, the sweeter the orgasm,
because the buildup will be a lot more intense.
Regulate your breathing, and when you feel the orgasm
coming on, try to calm yourself down by taking a deep breath
and then clench your pubic muscles.

Once the orgasm recedes somewhat, it is safe to begin

thrusting again. Repeat this process as much as possible,
stopping and clenching at regular intervals. This will allow
you to build excitement within your partner to incredible
levels!

Eventually, you are going to want your climax otherwise the

sex would end up becoming frustrating. This is when your
orgasm control will come into play.

Once you are close to orgasm and this time you actually want
to climax let it happen and then clench your pubic muscles
while it is happening. This will prevent you from ejaculating
but would give you the full pleasure of the orgasm that you are
experiencing.

If you fail at this technique initially, don’t take it too hard. It is

actually a fairly difficult technique to master, but with a bit of
practice you will be stopping your orgasms in no time,
allowing you to have hours of sex!
Chapter 15 The Female Orgasm
Don’t worry. Tantra is just as aware of the problems women
face during sex as it is of males. This is why there are sexual
practices in this spiritual way of life for women too!

A common saying in tantric philosophy is that the most

powerful organ of sex that a woman possesses is her mind.
This is because her arousal can often be dampened by negative
emotions that would get in the way of her lust. These thoughts,
emotions like anxiety or anger or guilt, can have a profound
impact on your sex because they would distract your partner
from the act of lovemaking.

Hence, it is important to place less of an emphasis on the

theatrics of lovemaking and more on what your woman is
feeling. However, this important piece of information is not
enough to allow you to give your woman the mind blowing
orgasms that she deserves, so listed below are some techniques
that you can apply.

Clitoral Stimulation
What most men are practically clueless about is the fact that
women are not all that turned on by penetration. The act is
erotic in and of itself and it provides some sexual stimulation,
but the clitoris provides the majority of sexual stimulation.

Hence, it is very important that you stimulate the clitoris if you

want your woman to achieve orgasm. Be gentle in the way that
you stimulate the clitoris and be patient. Overdoing it can
cause women discomfort.
Additionally, don’t pressure your partner to orgasm, as this
would stress her out and completely turn her off from the sex.

The G-spot
In tantra there is what is called a sacred spot within a woman’s
vagina. This spot is a couple of inches within the vaginal canal
on the top. This sacred spot is often called the g spot, and is
the key to giving your partner extremely explosive orgasms.

Place a finger into your partner’s vagina and attempt to feel for
the spot at the top of the vaginal canal. You will feel it as
being about half the size of a penny with a crumpled surface
that is almost like the ripples inside your own mouth.

The vast majority of women can have excellent orgasms

induced by stimulating this spot, with many of these women
even ejaculating which is a very rare occurrence that happens
only when an earth shaking orgasm happens.

The g spot, or sacred spot, is a nexus of powerful tantric

energy. It is believed by some to be a source of kundalini
energy. Stimulating this spot releases that energy in a way that
no other pressure point in the body is able to release. This
energy shoots up within your body, activating your kundalini
and all of your other chakras for a fraction of a second.

Hence, a g spot orgasm is a source of not only pleasure but

immense power as well!
Chapter 16 How to Give an Erotic
Massage to Help Increase Intimacy
A sensual massage is one that focuses on the partner’s
erogenous zones to provide both stress relief and to increase
the intimacy between the masseuse and recipient. The goal of
a sensual massage is not to orgasm, as we have discussed the
role of Tantra and its purpose before, but rather to incorporate
a highly personal and relaxing experience into your life. It
allows both partners to receive pleasure without the pressure
of performance and to incorporate an alternate source
of intimacy into their relationship. Giving or receiving a
tantric massage is a great way to bond with your partner.

It is extremely important, however,

to communicate beforehand. This ensures that both partners
are comfortable with the level of intimacy of the massage.
After this, both you and your partner can reap the benefits of
this relaxing and personal moment of exploring each other’s
bodies. A Tantric massage is the perfect solution to when you
feel that even the intimacy exercises we discussed before seem
like they aren’t helping you much.

There are many different ways to give a Tantric massage and

in time you will learn how to develop your OWN massage
techniques suited to you and your partner. However, if you are
confused as to how to begin, here is a guide, or rather two, on
how to give your partner a sensual, Tantric massage:

Before you attempt how to learn to give a tantric massage, you

have to take care of the ingredients you will be using. Learn
them, put them together in the right combination and you will
see your partner being very happy indeed. A Tantric massage
delivered well and good can be one of the greatest doorways to
passion.

Set the Mood

This is an extremely important part of tantric massage. This
massage is supposed to be sexy and that will not be possible
unless you are both into it. The best way to get into a situation
is by setting the atmosphere or the mood of the room at a level
of ease at which you are both able to indulge and lose yourself.
There are many ways you can set the mood. Try to alter the
lighting by making it dim but not too dark. This provides a
comfortable ambience and will help your partner believe that
their body looks sexy in the semi-darkness. Next, prepare the
station. You will do this according to the type of massage you
will be attempting to give. If it is a simple head or shoulder
massage, you only need a chair. Otherwise it would be nice to
prepare a stable surface such as a table or even the floor. Just
remember that the surface needs to be firm enough for them to
lie down so you can work your magic.

Music
This is an essential part of setting the correct mood for the
massage. Note that in these situations, rough music such as
heavy metal won’t work. Choose something according to what
your goal is. Sometimes you might want to give a massage to
get them in the mood for sex and others you might want them
to relax and drift off to sleep. Choose accordingly. If you are
going for sex, choose something like intimate soul music. If
you are going for relaxation, choose soft blues or nature
sounds. Running water is especially soothing to help someone
drift off.

The Oil
This is the vital ingredient for your massage. Consider this
your turkey to your thanksgiving dinner. There are several
different oils you can use, such as avocado, jojoba and grape
seed oil. Experiment with a few and find what you like or what
suits your partner the best. These oils are all usually available
at health food stores, spa shops or skin care stores. You can
even buy pre-blended massage oils that contain two or more
oils. Make sure to buy any oil that helps your hands glide
easily without chafing your partner’s skin. Remember, comfort
is the most important part of the whole massage.
Try and buy organic oil in small quantities and then store it in
a cool and dry place.

Tantric Massage Techniques

This part will consist of two separate methods, one that will
help you massage a female body and the other that caters to a
male body’s needs of the same. Fundamentally, both bodies
are more or less same but their treatment is somewhat
different. Hence, here is the correct way to massage a female
body:

Of course massages vary from type to type but one of the best
tantric massages is the full body massage because it helps a
person to relax under your touch and increases intimacy
between you both.

Try and practice the techniques that are about to be relayed to

you on your own body so that you know that you aren’t being
too hard on your recipient as well. Your thigh should be
perfect to practice on.

Shiatsu
This is one of the easiest and most commonly used massage
techniques in Japan. If you have received a massage with
someone rubbing the knots under your skin out using their
thumbs or elbows, you have had the shiatsu style massage
treatment.

The technique involves placing your fingers or hands upon a

particular place on her body. Apply gentle pressure and then
move your hand or finger in a circular motion. The best spot
for using this technique is the upper back, so use it to loosen
up the knots in that area. Just make sure that you don’t
compress so hard that you cause her pain!

You might have seen experienced massage therapists applying

pressure by using their elbows. However, this is an advanced
technique that you should avoid unless you have real
experience or are a licensed masseuse.

Compression
Compression is another popular method for massage. In order
to perform a compression massage, you must apply pressure to
one area of your partners’ body. This will increase the flow of
blood to this area and remove tension and rigidity from the
muscle. This massage is much like a warm up for the more
intense styles of massage such as shiatsu. If you are extremely
tense, don’t go for shiatsu immediately because its intensity
might injure you. Instead, have your partner give you a
compression massage, it will boost blood flow and loosen up
your muscles for shiatsu.

Stroking
The name of this massage is very descriptive. Stroking
massages are very different from compression or shiatsu
massages in that applying concentrated pressure does not
perform them. Instead, this massage involves sliding your
hands across parts of her body such as her thighs or back. It is
a very stimulating form of massage and become extremely
erotic if you do it right. It is also minimal in its intensity and a
lot easier to do than compression or shiatsu massages.

Friction
This is a high level technique that can be applied to the more
bonier parts of your partners body such as her hands or feet. In
this technique, you do not need to use oils. Instead, you must
use your dry hands to generate heat via friction. The strokes
must be firm but no hard, as compression is not required. In
fact, compression would an impediment to the speed at which
your hand is travelling across her body. This type of massage
is in many ways a more advanced technique than stroking.

Kneading
This massage is amazing for reaching into deeper parts of her
muscles and is especially good for relieving tension from the
fleshy areas such as the buttocks. Be very gentle because you
do not want to harm her. Do not perform this massage on her
stomach because that will make her feel uncomfortable.

If you have ever baked bread before, you will realize that this
massage is similar to kneading bread. To knead the muscles,
take hold of the muscle and give it a slight dig with your
fingers whilst raising the tissue with your thumbs. Do not lift
too high because that will hurt. First, you will press your palm
into their muscles, and then you will squeeze their muscles
slightly and then give a gentle lift with your thumb. Try it
gently on your thigh and use the same gentle motions on her
skin. This massage is also good for her shoulders especially if
you sense a tension in them. Remember to give her a little
Shiatsu first, however, since directly kneading an already tense
shoulder or neck muscle can be quite painful.
These massages are excellent if you combine them. Mixing up
shiatsu, oil massage, compression, stroking and friction can be
a great way to keep things interesting. Remember, doing the
same thing over and over again will get boring for the both of
you and will stop being effective after a little while, so apply
different massage techniques to different parts of the body and
your lover will be in heaven by the time you are done.

Tantric Massage for Males

The tantric massage for a man will be different than the
normal erotic massage. Remember that a man might be more
wary of a massage than a female though he may not show it.
Put your partner at ease before you initiate this massage
because you will be touching them in a way that might seem
too intimate to their masculinity, hence be prepared to be
gentle without seeming like you are patronizing them .

If you wish to massage your partner’s penis, it is highly

recommended that you use some kind of oil to make it easier
to rub. Massaging a dry penis can result in chafing and is
usually not nearly as enjoyable as a massage that is performed
with oil. Using oil in this manner will also prevent you from
potentially injuring your partner during the act of massaging.

A good massage that involves tantric practice would require

the use of both of your hands. This is because you have several
areas that you would ideally have to stimulate, and in
stimulating at least two areas at the same time will greatly
boost the amount of arousal that your partner experiences.

Try to stroke his penis up and down whilst simultaneously

massaging his testicles. His testicles are extremely sensitive,
which means that if you gently stimulate them he is going to
feel a ticklish and warm sensation within his penis. This will
make him feel as though he is perpetually about to have an
orgasm throughout your massage!
Chapter 17 Supplementary Activities to
Improve Tantric Sex
The purpose of tantra is to help you to achieve the mind-
blowing orgasms that have been denied to you while using
standard sexual practices. However, this does not mean that
tantra can be taken lightly.

It is important that you think of tantra as something akin to a

workout. Although tantric sex is admittedly a lot more
enjoyable than spending enormous amounts of time in the
gym, the amount of physical exertion that your body can go
through is comparable to that experienced while performing
heavy exercises.

Additionally, there are levels to tantric sex. Simply diving into

tantra without any sort of experience or preliminary practice
may make your sex life better, but trust me when I say that the
level of sex you are experiencing is not even close to what you
would experience if you “warm up” before you engage in the
sex.

There are several ways in which you can warm up, but
possibly the best way possible would be to give your partner a
massage and have your partner give you one as well. This will
loosen up your muscles, which is important because stiff
muscles can get in the way of a full body orgasm.

The massage that you can give in order to prepare your lover
for tantric sex has some very specific rules attached to it, along
with a technique that is designed to heighten sexual sensitivity
and make the body more receptive to sexual stimulation.
Additionally, this massage can be coupled with a technique
that can be used on a woman in order to make her achieve
orgasm. This can contribute greatly to the quality of tantric
sex, because receiving one orgasm makes one a little more
patient for the next one, allowing you to really tease her and
draw the sex out!
Oil
The first thing that you need before you can give your lover
this pre sex massage is oil. Oil is a great tool to use if you
want your massage to be more effective. It helps by loosening
the skin up and providing lubrication for your hands. If your
hands are able to slide across your lovers body more
effectively it will also help to make the massage more sensual
and help to lead up to the actual sex!

The best oil that you can use in a pre sex massage is grape
seed oil. This is because grape seed oil has the fewest number
of people that are allergic to it, and can actually be really great
for your skin. Hence, by giving your lover a grape seed oil
massage you are going to be helping her or him get softer skin
as well, which is an excellent added bonus.

If grape seed oil is not available, go for any other oil that has
been specifically manufactured for the purpose of massages.
The Technique
The first thing that you are going to need to do is obviously
spread the oil across your lover’s body. Make sure that the oil
is distributed evenly across the body, and keep it in mind that
too little oil will not provide adequate lubrication but too much
would just end up getting messy and annoying. Try to find the
happy medium!

While you are spreading the oil across your partner’s body,
you will find that the skin absorbs the oil very quickly. Hence,
you will have to frequently spread more oil across her if the
lubrication stops being adequate.

Once the oil has been spread across your partner’s body, the
massage can properly begin. Initially it would be a good idea
to start with basic compression of all of the major muscles.
The muscle you should really go for when applying wide and
non-specific compression is the thigh, because this area is
usually under the most strain throughout the day.

Once the muscles have been loosened up in your partner’s

legs, you can move on to his or her back, the second most
tense area of the average body, Just apply pressure with your
flattened palm, and remember to communicate with your
partner as much as you can about what feels good and what is
painful.

Try lightly slapping areas that you feel are already loose in
order to stimulate blood circulation in these areas. Remember
not to slap so hard that it hurts, unless your partner wants you
to of course!
Once you have completed this massage and loosened up the
major muscle groups, it is time to begin focused compression
with the tips of your fingers and your fists. There are specific
areas that you should be targeting during focused compression,
and these areas are specified in the next section.
Areas to Target
Breasts
The breasts are one of the most widely fetishized areas of the
entire human body, and also happen to be the source of a lot of
sexual stimulation for many people. They also tend to have
very concentrated points of tension which, when released, end
up making the person in question feel incredibly relaxed.

Hence, breasts are obviously going to be one of the most

important areas of the body that you can target. Points of
tension here are probably going to be on the lower half of the
breasts. It is important that you feel around, trying to find the
area where the tension exists.

Generally, this little ball of tension can be found just below the
nipple, and your partner will probably cry out when you hit it
because of the intensity of the pain she will feel. However, do
not misinterpret this pain and stop massaging her. This pain is
actually a very enjoyable pain, with many people comparing it
to the feeling once gets while scratching an itch.

An important thing to not while performing these massages is

the origin of these little balls of tension in the various areas of
the body. They are not simply muscular tension; their origin is
actually a lot more metaphysical than physical.

You are already familiar with the various chakras of your

body. However, you probably don’t know that these chakras
are major stops in a vast network of energy that is flowing
within your body, nexuses through which energy constantly
flows. However, there are certain situations where the flow of
energy can end up getting disrupted.
This usually happens due to a poor diet or an injury in a past
life that is having a residual effect on your body in this life. As
a result, when you apply deep pressure to these points the
energy starts to be released, thus removing the obstruction that
was blocking the flow of energy in your body.

Releasing energy is painful but at the same time enjoyable

because the flow of energy provides vitality and increased
sexual sensitivity to your body. This means that when you
massage these points, your partner is going to feel an intense
itching sensation that will devolve into a tickling sensation as
the blockage is removed from your energy pathways.

The best way in which you can apply pressure to this

particular point is by pressing down using the tips of your
fingers. Start by applying pressure and moving your hands in a
circular motion. This will release the energy blockage in a
very mild and efficient way. The circular motion loosens up
stuck energy and then allows your hand to move away to a
different part of the blockage, allowing the loosened up energy
to flow into the energy pathway without being obstructed by
the compression of your fingers.

You can also apply intense pressure to this point. This is very
useful because it will release energy from the blockage in an
extremely intense manner, and this will end up opening your
partner up for intense sexual stimulation.

Butt
This is another area of the body that most people are very
aroused by. As it turns out, the butt is just as prone to
blockages in energy as breasts are, probably because of the
intense amount strain they go through when the people they
are attached to spend the vast majority of their day sitting in an
office. With the amount of sitting that we do, it really is no
wonder that the pathways of energy in our derrieres end up
getting backed up.

The important thing here is to feel your way around the area.
Blockages can occurs in several different parts of the butt, so
you will have to poke around a little to find out where exactly
the blockage has occurred. An odd little coincidence is that the
energy blockage is probably going to occur in the exact same
place on both cheeks, so if you find the spot on one cheek
simply start pressing the exact same spot on the other cheek as
well.

Apply the same circular motion with the tips of your fingers
that you used on your partner’s breast. These energy blockages
might require some more pressure however, so if your partner
is unable to feel anything when you are massaging him or her,
just trying using your thumb instead.

You might face difficulty finding the pressure point in this part
of the body, especially if your partner has been gifted with a
curvy backside. This is because the energy pathways are
buried underneath a lot of flesh. Breasts rarely ever pose such
a problem, even if the breasts in question are quite large.

This is because the pressure points located in breasts are not as

deep as the one’s in the backside. Hence, if you are facing
difficult locating your partner’s pressure point, use your thumb
and it will definitely do the trick. If your thumb is still not
sufficient, try using something rigid like a pen to apply
pressure, just make sure you use the rear end of the pen and
not the pointy end!
Using such a tool will help you to provide incredibly focused
pressure onto the energy blockage, facilitating a very quick
dissipation of energy and in the process probably turning your
partner on a great deal.

Inner thighs
Finding the blockage in energy in this area of your body might
turn out to be a lot more difficult than finding it on other parts
of the body. This is why a perfunctory massage of the thighs is
necessary before you begin to probe for pressure points.

The muscle massage is helpful because it will remove a lot of

distractions from that general area. A lot of the time you might
be probing for the pressure point and would supposedly find it
quickly, only to discover that it was just basic muscle pain and
not the pain that stems from a blocked energy pathway.

However, if you have relaxed the muscles in your partner’s

thighs, the process should be a lot easier. One good tip that
you should follow is to look for the pressure point in the upper
inner thigh, which means the area of your thigh that is directly
below your partner’s crotch.

Try to squeeze this area generally in order to find a general

location of the pressure point, and then narrow it down by
using the tips of your fingers. When you find the pressure
point, start applying the same circular pressure that you used
with both the previous body parts.

Be mindful while applying pressure to the inner thighs. The

pressure point here is a lot more delicate than the pressure
points in the butt or even the breasts. Gentle pressure will get
the job done, and applying too much pressure will just end up
causing unnecessary pain that will probably force your partner
out of the mood.

If the circular motion technique proves to be too intense for

your partner, try moving your fingers forward as you gently
massage the point instead. This will help by applying much
gentler pressure than the circular motion, and the fact that it is
much more sensual certainly doesn’t hurt either!

Lower back
This area of the body is very different from the three areas
discussed previously, and so will tackled in a manner that is
completely different to the way that the previous body parts
were tackled

What makes the lower back so unique is that it doesn’t have a

single point of energy blockage that you will have to focus on.
Rather, you are partner will have one of two possible energy
blockage situations, each of which has its own specific
technique that you can use to tackle it.

The first situation would be that there are several dozen

separate points of energy blockage that are peppering across
your entire lower back, being focused specifically on the
section of your lower back directly before your butt along with
the area of your lower back that is directly along your spine.

The second situation would be that the energy blockage would

be spread out across the entirety of your lower back, with the
energy nexuses actually interconnecting to form a network of
blockages similar to the actual network of energy pathways
that your body possesses.
The second situation is most often seen in women with large
breasts and people who do a lot of manual labor. This is
because such people tend to put a lot of strain on their lower
back, forcing the energy pathways to get blocked because
these strenuous activities would interrupt their circulation.

Overall, the lower back is always going to be a very serious

place of energy blockage unless your partner gets regular
massages, and the benefit of this is that even the slightest
massage in this area will greatly stimulate your partner and
will result in almost instant arousal if done right.

In order to find out which of the two energy blockage

situations your partner is suffering from you are going to have
to probe quite a lot. Use your fingers to see where the energy
blockages are. If there are spaces between the points where
your partner feels pain, this means that the energy blockages
that your partner is suffering from are separate from each
other.

However, if every inch of your partners back aches when you

massage it in that special itchy, tickly way, then your partner’s
energy blockage situation is of the second type.

The first situation is actually a lot more difficult to tackle than

the second situation. Since the energy blockages are not
connected, you are going to have to tackle each one
individually rather than all at the same time. This is because
attempting to massage several points at once could result in
unpleasant pain for your partner.

However, solving this energy blockage situation is actually not

that difficult once you get the hang of it. Simply press each
pressure point and release the blockage by moving your hands
in the circular motion that you will be familiar to by now. You
will soon discover that once you take care of one blockage, the
ones around it will begin to get weaker automatically.

This means that focusing on several important spots will allow

you to dissipate the energy blockages and have the energy
pathways flowing freely in no time.

The second situation, however, requires a very different

approach. The first thing you must know about this approach
is that it involves absolutely no subtlety. The energy blockage
is severe and is going to really get in the way of your partner’s
orgasm, and since the blockage is widespread and
interconnected the best thing that you can do is try to tackle at
much of it at the same time as you can.

Warm up your partner’s lower back by using your thumbs to

ease the energy blockages into getting a little weaker. After a
minute or two of this, you should begin using your fists.
Knead your partner’s lower back as if it was dough. This may
seem funny, but if you knead your partner’s lower back
exactly the way you would knead dough, with the quick
movements and not staying in the same place for too long,
your partner will soon be so relaxed that they’d feel as though
they are floating away.

The second situation, although technically more severe, is a lot

easier to dissipate than the first situation. Just make sure that
you do not end up hurting your partner by applying too much
pressure. Remember, communication is essential if you want
to make sure that the massage experience is as enjoyable as
possible.
You will find that no other area will provide as much sexual
stimulation as the lower back as it is being massaged. This is
because the energy that is being released is actually making
them a lot more sensitive to sexual stimuli. Giving your
partner a full body orgasm will become a lot easier after you
have massaged her back to the fullest extent possible.

Feet and hands

Each and every body part that has been discussed in this
section is important. Massaging these body parts is an
essential part of preparing your body for the intensity of tantric
sex. However, even though the lower back is home to the most
severe energy blockage in your entire body, there are no parts
of your body that is more important to massage than your
hands and your feet.

This is because your hands and feet contain major energy

pathways due to the fact that so much energy is lost and
gained through your extremities. And since you use your
hands and feet so much, a lot of these energy pathways end up
getting blocked.

This is particularly important to note because the pathway for

pretty much every single organ in your body is present in your
hands and feet. This means that easing the blockages out of the
energy pathways in your hands and feet will help your body to
become more sensitive to stimuli, making the climax of your
lovemaking that much more intense.

Since the pathways in your partner’s hand are so diverse and

close to each other, you do not have to focus on each point
individually. You can instead give your hands general
massages as long as you make sure that you target every part
of your hand during the massage.
However, as far as your partner’s feet are concerned a general
massage won’t do. The feet has separated clusters of energy
pathway nexuses instead of the pointillist spread of nexuses
that your hand has, which means that a general massage might
help you loosen the muscles of your foot up but probably
won’t do much to free the energy blockages.

Hence, for your feet you are going to have to apply deep
pressure using your thumb. The first area you should try is the
upper center of your foot, as this area commonly has a cluster
of energy blockages in it since so much strain is placed on it
throughout the day.

After you have applied pressure and loosened up this energy

blockage you can begin exploring for more blockages. Other
common areas include the heel and the big toe, with the little
toes also having nexuses for minor energy pathways.

You can also use this technique on your partner’s hands as

well. Certain areas of your hand contain blockages for nexuses
serving specific parts of the body. The body part that you
really care about right now is your partner’s vagina, so
naturally you are going to want to massage a part of your
partner’s hand that would help to remove energy blockages
leading to this all important part of your partner’s anatomy.

The part of your hand that connects via energy pathways to

your partner’s vagina is the heel of her hand, which is
basically the fleshy part of her hand underneath her thumb.
Pressing down here will definitely give your partner that itchy
pain that comes with the pressing of pressure points, but that’s
not all it does.
Blocked energy pathways are a big contributor to your
inability to bring your partner to orgasm. If no energy is
reaching the area that so desperately needs energy in order to
climax, your partner will not have an orgasm no matter how
many fancy tricks you try.

Hence, releasing the energy blockage from this part of your

partner’s hand will help make her vagina a lot more sensitive.
The important part is that it will become sensitive all the way
through, which is going to make her g spot, that rarely
discovered fount of infinite ecstasy for women, a lot easier to
find.

This easy discovery of your partner’s g spot is going to prove

immensely useful in the next part of the chapter, where a
unique technique is going to be discussed that is going to give
you the ability to provide your partner with mind blowing
orgasms that will course through her entire body and
potentially last for hours!

The Two-Finger Jerk Technique

This technique is probably one of the most useful techniques
that you could possibly learn for the purpose of sexual
fulfillment. There is no greater pleasure than giving your
partner an intense orgasm, and using this technique you are
going to be able to give your partner orgasms that she is going
to remember for the rest of her life.

It is very important that you perform the massage properly for

several days at least before trying this technique. It involves
intense sexual energy, and attempting to do it while your
partner’s energy pathways are blocked can result in the energy
congestion getting a lot worse than it was.
This is because this techniques results in a veritable eruption
of sexual energy from your partner’s vagina at the time of the
orgasm. Remember, these are full body orgasms that you are
about to give your partner, so the sexual energy that she is
about to emit is going to be intense.

Additionally, you are probably going to end up giving her far

more than one orgasm. This technique will allow you to give
her orgasm after orgasm, which means that the energy is not
just going to be intense, there is going to be a lot of it coursing
through her so her energy pathways need to be clear.

Once you have given her the aforementioned massage every

day for at least a week, you will be ready to apply the
technique. Give her the same massage in order to get her into
the mood and get her as relaxed as possible. Remember, the
more relaxed she is, the fewer blockages there are going to be
during the act itself. Getting her nice and loose would mean
that the orgasm would rip through her in no time.

Once the massage is finished, have her lie on her back, relax
all of her muscles and then spread her legs. Once her legs are
spread, stimulate her vagina by rubbing it gently. You will
notice that she is a lot more receptive to your touch right now.
This is because her sexual energy is flowing a lot more freely
than it was before, and as a result her vagina is going to feel
everything a lot more strongly.

Once you have stimulated her clitoris using your fingers, you
must insert two fingers into her vagina. It is highly
recommended that you face your palm upwards and insert
your middle and ringer fingers in with your index and little
fingers facing downwards and your thumb facing outwards.
Once you are in, you will have to jerk your hand upwards.
Your fingers are going to be directly underneath your partner’s
g spot, a bundle of nerves that, when stimulated, can give your
partner extremely intense orgasms. Jerking your hand upwards
will press your inserted fingers against your partner’s g spot,
and you will immediately notice that there are waves of
intense pleasure flowing across her body.

You can ease her into the process by stroking her g spot with
your inserted fingers before you begin to jerk your hands
upwards. Whatever you do, make sure that when you do jerk
your hand upwards you do it with moderate force.

You may feel as though your partner might get injured if you
are too rough with her, but try not to worry about her vagina
too much. After all, the vagina is where babies come from,
which means that it is designed to be able to handle a bit of
rough handling.

Not being forceful enough would result in you not being able
to stimulate her g spot. However, if you apply enough force,
you are going to be able to make her orgasm within three
minutes, and before your eyes you are going to see the efficacy
of this technique as your partner practically loses control of
her limbs.

Once you give her the first orgasm, giving her another orgasm
is going to be very easy. All you will have to do is apply the
same technique but for a much shorter period of time. Try to
see how many times you make her orgasm before she can’t
take anymore, with this technique it’ll be easy!
Chapter 18 : Teachings of tantric sex

In this chapter we will look at certain teachings of tantra that

will help you increase the intimacy, sexual pleasure and it will
also help you change your life and relationships for the better.
When these teachings are made proper use of then they can
also help you take a step closer to enlightenment. Each one of
these teachings can be used in two ways, a sexual and a non-
sexual way.
Breathe
Remember to breathe. If you have noticed, then you would
have realized that a lot of importance has been given to
breathing in almost all the teachings that have originated in the
East and these teachings can help you attain enlightenment. It
is essential that you understand why this is done and the
manner in which it is related to Tantra and spiritual
development as well.

The answer is quite simple, we all breathe all the time and if
we stop breathing for too long it might result in death or
becoming unconscious. In this manner, it can be understood
that breath is related to our consciousness. Breath can be
thought of as energy; every breath we take fills our body with
a fresh burst of oxygen and takes away the carbon dioxide.
This oxygen is in turn supplied to all the cells in the body.
Breath and oxygen can be thought of as fundamental needs of
our body. Breathing is not a conscious but an unconscious
function. You might not pay attention to whether or not you
are breathing, but you never really stop breathing till the day
you die. Your life is dependent on something that you don’t
even do voluntarily.

What would happen if we were to make breathing a conscious

effort? All the teachings from the East, including Tantra make
relating a conscious function and this will help transform the
way the practitioner of this functions. Like I have stated
earlier, breath is energy. And by being able to regulate your
breathing, you will be able to regulate the energy generated as
well.

You might be able to notice some interesting things if you can

focus on not just your own breathing, but also that of your
partner while engaged in a sexual activity. It is quite common
that while having sex, people engaged in it tend to either hold
in their breath for a few moments when they get excited. And
then they let out a lot of the air that they were holding on to.
When you halt your breathing in such a manner and then let it
all out by a jolt, then the energy flowing in your body is likely
to be disrupted as well. When you make breathing a conscious
act during sex, you will learn how to control the movement of
energy instead of just allowing it to flow in the body.

This teaching of tantra is all about breathing in a relaxed

manner, take deep breaths, do not stop breathing and don’t
tighten your lungs. Let the breath flow freely. Only when you
do this will the energy flow through your body freely. When
your breathing is short or even shallow, this ends up choking
the energy in our body.

If you want to achieve a full body orgasm then it becomes

easy when you breathe deeply. Focus on your breathing and
allow it to move without any restrictions in your body. Feel the
breath filling and then leaving your lungs fully.
Relax
In the same manner in which shallow breathing can obstruct
the flow of energy while participating in sex, the tension in
your muscles will also do the same. The muscular tension that
you experience during sexual activity is not a conscious one,
but an unconscious one. The principle of tantric sex is to
make this muscular tension a conscious decision to help you
become aware of all the muscles that are being held up. You
do require some tension to facilitate the movement if body and
for also holding up the body, but that’s about it. Muscular
tension is not needed everywhere.

If you make the decision of tensing up your muscles a

conscious one, you will observe that during sex you tend to
tense up some muscles unnecessarily. A man might tense up
his muscles even while enjoying oral sex. All he needs to do is
lie down on his back and enjoy the ministrations provided to
him by his partner; even then he might end up tensing his
muscles in his torso and legs. In this case you would notice
that none of this tension is required. Let the energy flow
without any restrictions in the body. Focus your attention on
not just relaxing your muscles but also on breathing. Enjoy the
warmth of the sexual energy that is flowing through your
body.

However it is essential that you understand that relaxation is

required of not just your body but your mind as well. Let go of
all the expectations, just enjoy the act you are involved in.
bask in the warmth of this energy. Let go of all the
unnecessary emotions; don’t hold yourself back.
Sounds can help!
Sounds are critical for the movement of energy as well. Some
people might not be comfortable or they might even be self
conscious or nervous about the way they sound, but don’t take
this consideration seriously while considering tantric sex.

Let go of all your inhibitions. Express yourself freely and

without any restrictions. Make all those sounds that can
express the way you are feeling while engaged in the act.
These sounds that you make involuntarily can be referred to as
connected sounds. That is, these sounds are connected with the
emotions or even sensations that you are experiencing. These
sounds will help in the unobstructed flow of energy in your
body.
If you are quite or silent, then the movement of energy
becomes difficult. But when you are loud or vocal, then the
energy can start moving freely in your body. The more sounds
you make, the pleasure quotient you experience will also be
more. So, the noise you make is directly proportional to the
pleasure you experience. The more connected these sounds are
to your emotions and sensations, the more freely and
powerfully the energy can move within your body.

If you trying to decipher the sounds associated with each of

these emotions and come up blank, don’t worry, because these
sounds will be generated only while you are experiencing
something. Think about all the pleasurable times, it might
make you gasp or moan slightly, some experiences might just
cause you to intake a sharp breath. All these will contribute to
the sounds that you make while engaged in sexual intercourse.
Everything that you feel has a sound. The sound produced
need not be coherent, it is just about expressing your emotions
in a vocal manner.
While having sex, there might be some experiences that make
you feel ecstatic and this will be expressed in the sounds you
make. But on the other hand there might be some experiences
that might be unpleasant or painful. Do not hold back on these
sensations, if something seems painful, and then make the
sound that you are in pain. This will help in letting your
partner know that you are in pain. It is not just about being
vocal, but you can be verbal as well. Verbal means the making
use of words to express what you are feelings whereas vocal
means the making use of sounds to communicate the same.
You have the liberty to say what you are feeling, if you feel
that something is unpleasant or painful, express it. If you feel
that something is pleasurable or just perfect express that as
well. Do not hold back your emotions. When you express
yourself through sounds, the energy tends to move faster than
while expressing through words.

You can consider the example of a toddler who has just

acquired speech. At this age, they communicate their feelings
through the sounds the make. Think about a child throwing a
tantrum, the gamut of angry sounds they make can help the
parent understand that the child is cranky and requires
something. All you hear would be a jumble of sounds and
hardly any words. Even if words were present, the words
would be to the point like a loud “No”. Toddlers are capable of
expressing their emotions loudly, whether be it their laughter
or the wails of their sadness. This is how they express their
emotions.

And in the same manner, let go of your inhibitions. Make

sounds that you want to, it doesn’t matter what they sound like
either to you or your partner, because these sounds are capable
of expressing what you are experiencing at a particular
moment. The more you keep doing this, the deeper and
connected your sexual activity will be and the result will also
be much better.
It is really important that I stress on the importance of this
point. Of all the principles of tantra, this seems to be the one
that a lot of people struggle with. Let go of your inhibitions
and express yourself freely.
Eye contact is essential
This might sound pretty basic and obvious to some extent. But
it really does help make your sexual experience more
pleasurable, enjoyable and intense. Looking at your partner
while engaged in any sexual act will definitely make the
experience more intense. When I say eye contact, I don’t mean
that you should stare wistfully into the eyes of your partner.
Move over the longing look a love struck puppy has in its
eyes, we are talking about some serious X-rated gazing, so get
ready for it. This way will definitely help you attain some
extra intimacy. For getting started you and your partner can
find a comfortable spot to sit so that you both will be able to
look into each other’s eyes. Take a moment to gather your
concentration; usually a deep breath will do the trick. Once
you feel that you are ready, you can open your eyes and gaze
into those of your partner. Allow your partner the access to see
you, your true self, and in the same manner you can gaze at
them. This might feel a little stupid initially, but trust me when
I say that this little trick is extremely effective. And this trick
provides you the liberty to incorporate it whenever you want
to.

Allow yourself to communicate through your eyes and not just

your genitals. You can let your eyes wander over each other’s
body. Let your partner see the lust in your eyes and the wanton
abandonment. Nothing would be a better turn on than knowing
that your partner desires you and needs you. In the manner that
sounds and touch can communicate, in the same way you can
communicate a lot more by making use of just your eyes
alone. This will help you both communicate with each other in
an earnest manner.
Pay attention
Energy flows where the attention goes, is a popular saying in
the tantric circles. You will have to concentrate on how and
where you want the energy to flow. If you are looking to
achieve a full body orgasm, then you will need to focus on
your entire body. You will have to pay some attention to
feeling those highly sexualized feelings in all your cells as
well. A woman who wants to achieve a splendid vaginal
orgasm will have to concentrate her attention to deep within
herself and pry out all the sexual sensations hiding within. You
can make use of the breathing technique and also of muscle
relaxation, as well as eye contact coupled with sound to focus
your attention and draw out your energy to the spot where you
want it to go to. You can choose to focus only on your genitals
the place where the sexual energy is stored.

The philosophy of tantra suggests that an individual should let

the sexual energy spread all through the body instead of
confining it to just one area. To facilitate the energy to move
from the genitals and spread through all the different cells.
This energy can be used to help revitalize the body or for any
other sexual purpose. The energy flow will be where your
attention is. So concentrate on that while engaging in sex.
Always be present
The underlying principle of all the teachings is to be present.
Present does not just imply being physically present, but
mentally present as well. Be present in the moment. Do not
wander off to your dreamland or fantasize about anything else.
Try to be in the moment with your partner. Be present in what
is happening.

Often it so happens that people end up zoning off to their

fantasy world while engaged in sex. They close their eyes and
drift to their fantasy realms instead of being present in the
lovemaking. Sometimes men also do this on purpose. They
can think about something completely non sexual to postpone
their ejaculation. This is thought of as being unnecessary in
tantra or anything associated to energy work. If you are
present, you will be able to endure more of what is happening
around you. Only when you are fully aware of what is
happening around you will you be able to experience the
moment to the fullest. Energy goes where the attention does,
and if your attention is fixated on something entirely different,
then even your energy will follow suit. Focus your energy on
yourself and your lover. Try to be in the moment; do not lose
focus of that. And when this happens the potential of seeking
greater pleasure will be diminished.

These principles will surely help you to have a better sexual

experience when implemented.
Chapter 19 Tantric Sex During
Pregnancy
Pregnancy is a difficult time for women to go through, but this
difficulty is compounded by the fact that they cannot have sex
for nine months. Or can they?
There are many misconceptions regarding sex during
pregnancy, and these misconceptions often stop women from
giving tantric sex a try during pregnancy.
Tantric sex is actually very useful during pregnancy, due to the
fact that it opens up channels of energy that can be extremely
helpful for the health of both the mother and the baby.
Additionally, going months on end without sex is not an
attractive prospect for anybody, least of all a pregnant woman
that is probably far more sexually aroused than she ever was
before the pregnancy due to her pregnancy hormones.
Hence, in order to clear up these misconceptions regarding sex
during pregnancy and facilitate your inclusion of tantric
practices during your sex life even while you or your partner
have a bun in the oven, here is a list of common problems that
people think sex during pregnancy might cause along with the
truth behind these misconceptions.

Will I go into premature labor if I have an orgasm

during pregnancy?
There is definitely logic behind this misconception. Orgasms
cause contractions in the uterus, and cause the body to release
a chemical called oxytocin. Contractions in the uterus are
essentially what labor is, and oxytocin is the hormone that the
body releases in order to trigger the rupturing of the amniotic
sac and the beginning of the first contractions that would force
the baby out of your womb.
However, there is no reason to really worry about this
happening as long as you are healthy during your pregnancy
and are not suffering from any pregnancy related conditions.
This is because your brain is capable of distinguishing the
difference between the oxytocin that is released during an
orgasm and the oxytocin that it releases when it is time to go
into labor. In fact, orgasms during pregnancy are actually quite
amazing because of increased blood flow to that area!

Can my partner ’ s penis injure my baby?

This concern should be taken a lot less seriously than the one
before this, simply because there is absolutely no reason for it
to even be considered while you are having sex during
pregnancy.
The main reason why it is such a ridiculous concern is that the
average male penis is not large enough to even reach the
cervix at the very end of the woman’s vagina. Even if you do
have a partner with an extraordinarily large penis, the cervix
itself is two to four centimeters thick and it is completely
impossible that your partner would be able to reach your baby
through this protective barrier.
Even if the cervix was not present, the baby is protected by a
large amount of amniotic fluid and water. With so many
defenses put in place, you don’t have to worry about your
partner’s penis getting anywhere near your baby!

Can ejaculating inside the vagina harm the baby?

There is a certain stigma attached to sex during pregnancy
considering the fact that sperm might reach the baby. This is
actually completely untrue.
Much in the same way that the penis cannot reach the baby,
any sperm that is released inside your vagina will be stopped
by the cervix, or more specifically the mucus plug that stops
anything from crossing the cervix into the uterus. This mucus
plug disappears during the end of the pregnancy when labor is
imminent but even then the baby is safe and sound inside its
amniotic sac.
There is no need to worry. Nature has put a lot of safety
precautions in place to keep your baby safe, so just trust that it
has your back and enjoy your carnal pleasures! It will make
the pregnancy a lot easier on you to be sure.
Sex is dangerous for the mother
It is already pretty clear to you by now after reading the
previous few sections of this chapter that sex during pregnancy
has absolutely no chance of harming the baby at all as long as
pressure is not placed on your stomach when the baby bump
becomes more prominent.
The exact same principle applies for you as well, or your
partner if she is the mother in question here. Sex during
pregnancy can become tricky during the later stages when you
have to keep pressure off of the baby bump, but as long as you
avoid overly tricky positions or positions that put pressure on
your abdomen there is absolutely no reason that sex during
pregnancy would harm you.
Just remember to keep your doctor in the loop about
everything. Ask his advice and you will be able to avoid injury
to either yourself or your baby.
Now that these misconceptions have been cleared, it is
important that you also understand that sex is actually very
good for you while you are pregnant. Incorporating tantric sex
practices can actually be very beneficial for you.
In order to explain why exactly tantric sex can help you while
you are pregnant, here is a list of the various benefits that you
would be able to derive from having tantric sex while you are
pregnant.

Better orgasms
That’s right, orgasms during pregnancy aren’t just not
dangerous for you or your baby, they are actually far better
than orgasms that you would get while you were not pregnant.
There is a simple biological reason for this: better blood flow.
There is simply a lot more blood flow in that area while you
are pregnant, which means that the nerves that detect pleasure
during an orgasm are far more sensitive than they would be
otherwise, resulting in incredible orgasms.
The fact that tantric sex provides unimaginably good orgasms
without you even being pregnant should definitely make you
want to have sex while you are pregnant. Just imagine the
intensity of the orgasms you would have combining tantric sex
with pregnancy!

Helps you keep your weight down

It is very important that you do not gain too much weight
while you are pregnant. This is due to the fact that labor can
become very difficult if you have a lot of fat that you have
gained while you were pregnant.
Exercise is great, but wouldn’t you rather burn calories by
having tantric sex? Tantric sex is extremely rigorous and burns
way more calories than you’d think. Do yourself a favor and
burn those calories in a fun way that is much safer for your
baby!

Decreased blood pressure

There is a medical condition that pregnant women sometimes
suffer from called preeclampsia. This occurs when your blood
pressure remains high for a long period of time.
There are medicines that you can take in order to lower your
blood pressure. However, these medicines are generally not all
that safe for your baby. Disrupting your internal chemistry in
any way can be harmful for your child.
Tantric sex is an excellent way to reduce blood pressure. All
you have to do is have some hot tantric sex and you will avoid
a medical condition that can cause serious problems during
labor.

Helps you deal with pain

Pregnant women go through a lot of pain. There will general
achiness along with cramps, all of which you have to
somehow get through for nine months. Once again, a medical
solution is available in the form of painkillers, and once again
taking medicines while you are pregnant is not the best idea.
Sex releases oxytocin in your body, which actually doubles
your pain tolerance. So have tantric sex and make yourself
immune to pain. You will be able to get through your
pregnancy without medicating yourself and will have tons of
fun while you are at it!

Helps you sleep

Pregnant women are often faced with sleepless nights. There
are a variety of reasons for this, but more often than not you
will probably just not feel sleepy, as your pregnancy hormones
would have disturbed your entire schedule.
If you are faced with natal insomnia, all you need to do is
wake your partner up for some steamy tantric sex. This will
calm you down immensely by releasing serotonin and
dopamine in your brain. These chemicals will help you to get
to sleep in no time!

Improves Your Immunity

There is a very little known fact about tantric sex: it boosts the
antibody count of your body. This will help you to stay healthy
during your pregnancy, as even a little illness could end up
harming your baby.
Makes you happier
Pregnancy is usually a time of emotional turmoil for most
expecting mothers. This is usually because their hormones are
driving them crazy.
A great way to balance out these hormones is, you guessed it,
tantric sex! As has been said before, tantric sex floods your
brain with endorphins that helps you to stay happy while your
baby grows inside you!

Makes you more intimate with your partner

Being intimate with your partner is extremely important if the
two of you want to be able to be good parents for your child.
Tantric sex is, perhaps, the single greatest way that you can
improve intimacy between your partner and yourself.

Helps make your post partum recovery quicker

Tantric sex is the best way to get an orgasm, and as it turns out
orgasms are a great way to prepare you for the rigors of labor.
Mix tantric sex up with kegels and you will be well prepared
for labor and will be able to recover very quickly after your
baby has been born!
Conclusion

I hope I was able to shed some light on the basic need of the
hour to get couples engage in a more involved sexual
experience.
Today’s world is all about rushing through. Whether it is our
food, relationships, sex, friends, conversations etc., everything
has become fast. But in fact ‘fast’ is not always the right way
to deal with things. “Quickies” and “casual sex” just don’t cut
it anymore and it is important to find an ideal partner and
engage in meaningful, deep-rooted sexual experiences.
I hope the book serves as your one true tantric sex guide and
inspires you to give it a try. We also hope it ushers you
towards attaining Tantric Sex Moksha.

RECOMMENDED READING

Tantric Massage: For Couples: Essential

Guide To Love Making & Couples Massage
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Third Eye: Third Eye, Mind Power,

Intuition & Psychic Awareness: Spiritual
Enlightenment
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Self Esteem: Self Confidence: Overcome

Fear, Stress & Anxiety: Self Help Guide
hyperurl.co/self-esteem

GREEK GODS: Myths, Legends and

Ancient History
hyperurl.co/greekgods