ACT ONE

INT. IN A HOTEL IN LONDON - MIDNIGHT

FLEABAG is naked in bed with GEORGE, a strong, sexy man who's

the owner of the grocery store, also naked. They had just
finished having sex.Both person are out of breath.

Shot of Fleabag on the bed to the outer-side. She then turned

to the camera.

FLEABAG
(rapid breath)
Well, sometimes you try really hard to
prevent something from happening, but
it just happen anyway. Sometimes it's
just really hard for me to not think
about sex, or pretend I'm not drunk so
that guy over there would invite me to
this place. And I swear, I really
tried this time.
(look at camera, firmly)

GEORGE
(breath rapid, seemed to be
excited, looked around)
God, thanks for the suggestion. This
is really a cozy hotel. Do you come
here a lot?

FLEABAG
(to the camera, shrug ,awkward)
Well, then, I guess it's the alcohol's
fault.
(to George)
Not...much?

GEORGE
Okay, never mind then. Your body is so
amazing. It just, tamed me, you know?

FLEABAG
Thanks? I guess?
(slow down breath)
Just a quick question, did you use the
back one?

GEORGE
Whao, hon, slow down, I'm not that
kind of person. BUT I did noticed you
 2.

have a... quite, unusually large arse.

FLEABAG
(to the camera)
Actually I'm feeling quite relieved
that somebody just tell me THAT
directly.

GEORGE
(put on his pants)
Can we do this, like, again someday? I
get some business to handle tomorrow,
so probably it's best for me to head
home now.

FLEABAG
(to the camera)
When men said things like this, you
know things are just not right.
(to George)
Maybe? I guess?-
(to the camera, unbelievable look)
What's the fucking wrong with me??

GEORGE
Great.This is really amazing. By the
way, you need any coupons on the
grocery for that amazing jobby?

FLEABAG
(to the camera)
NO, no. That would definitely make me
a prostitute.
(to George)
Yes, of course, thank you. See you
next Friday, no, wait, tomorrow.

George blinked at her, and left the room quickly.

(to the camera)

Again, I swear, this is all because of
the whisky he bought me. Wait, a
minute, did he?

INT. THE GUINEA PIG COFFEE SHOP, LONDON - EARLIER THIS DAY

The BANK MANAGER, who rejected Fleabag's loan few months ago,
is now having an interview again with Fleabag now.

BANK MANAGER
I think THIS meeting is frankly much
 3.

better than the last one. No

arguments, no fights, absolutely
peace. The treatment worked quite well
I guess.

FLEABAG
Yeah, I guess so.

BANK MANAGER
Well, you would be able to get that
loan from us sometime today, the
interest rate would be around 0.75%
per month. Wish you best luck with
the, er, female-led business. I might
pay a visit again to your shop
someday, hope that wouldn't be here
for debt collection.

FLEABAG
Haha, thanks, hope it won't happen.
(to camera)
IF, I have any customers this month.

BANK MANAGER
(looked around)
So, what are you going to do with the
money?

FLEABAG
Umm...I haven't come that far. Maybe
getting some...

(quickly peak at the empty freezer)

fresh ingredients?

BANK MANAGER
Yes, fresh ingredients.A coffee shop
definitely need that. Where do you
usually get ingredients?

FLEABAG
Uh...the supermarket across the
street?

BANK MANAGER
SO you order from the supermarket?

FLEABAG
Not...really. I only go there when
customers come. So basically, like,
 4.

really seldom.

BANK MANAGER
Well, I'm not an expert at opening
coffee shops, but I do suggest you
book some from the grocery store.

FLEABAG
(smiling awkwardly)
Yeah, yeah.

Suddenly, the guinea pig escaped from the cage again and
startled the bank manager. Fleabag tried to catch the guinea
pig for a few trials, eventually knocked down some chairs and
caught it.

BANK MANAGER
You really should get a new cage for
that... mascot?

He tried to help Fleabag with picking up the chairs, but one

chair leg fell off.

BANK MANAGER
And maybe...some new chairs? These,
are, a bit, too, VINTAGE?

FLEABAG
(smiling even more awkwardly)
Yeah, yeah.

BANK MANAGER
(reliefed)
Well, it seems you got a really busy
day today. Wish you best luck, anyway.

He turned around, and walked towards the shop.

FLEABAG
(earnest)
Wait!

The bank manager turned back, and looked at her.

FLEABAG
Thanks, for what you did.

BANK MANAGER
You're welcome. Glad to see both of us
don't need treatment anymore.
 5.

FLEABAG
Glad nothing perv happen this time.

BANK MANAGER
(hesitated for a second)
Glad nothing slut happen this time.

Both smiled at each other for a second.Then he left the

store. Fleabag waved at his back with really awkward smile on
her face. She petted the guinea pig for a while, gave it a
carrot, and put it back to the cage. Suddenly, the chair
behind her collapsed again.

FLEABAG
The chair definitely need one
treatment.

EXT. IN STREET, LONDON - LATER

Fleabag was in street.A man giving out advertisement gave her

a post. It had a half naked muscle man on the post. It was an
advertisement of the gym. The article has a large, black
printed title, "Restart you life from now". She raised her
eyebrows, folded the ad and put it with the shopping list she
brought along.

The bus came, she went in, took a seat, and started to look
at the shopping list.

There are a few things on the list, chair, cage for pets, new
plates, and at the bottom wrote, grocery store.

She sighed for a moment, held her forehead, titivated her

hair with the reflection of her self on the bus window, and
saw a man with thick glasses staring at her from the
reflection.

She looked back, stared at the man. The man smiled at her in
a nice way.

Fleabag took out the gym ad she received, unfolded it, raise
the ad, pointed at the title of the ad. The man looked
confused, and turned around to the other side.

FLEABAG
(to the camera, proudly)
Restarting No. 1, stop hooking up with
random guys you meet on the bus.

The camera stopped at her looking at herself in the window

for few seconds. Fleabag smiled at herself in the window.
 6.

INT. THE GROCERY STORE - LATER

Fleabag entered the grocery store.The grocery store had a

cozy tone, dim yellow lights filled the store. The store is
quite empty, as the grocery were sold out. Fleabag looked at
the clock on the wall, it's 5 pm, and the sign on the door
said the store closes at 5 pm. She looked into the store,
nobody was there.

FLEABAG
(in a loud voice)
Hello?

Some noises come from her behind. She turned around, and saw
a sexy, young, blonde man with clear blue eye carrying boxes
of fresh fruits on his shoulders. He's very fit.The abs on
his body was obvious even he's wearing a sweater. The man has
a name tag on his sweater, and it wrote, "George".George put
down the boxes, breath rapidly, wiped the sweat on his face,
and turned to Fleabag.

GEORGE
(smiling)
Hello, how can I help you?

FLEABAG
(to the camera)
I know this is stupid, and I might
regret it. I mean, look, he's the guy
anyone would crush for, but I do need
to stop hooking up with strangers.
(to George, nervous)
Can I have your number? No, I mean, it
seemed that this store is closed
today, and I might need to book some
grocery, so maybe I can get a name
card, or whatever, from you?

MAN OUTSIDE THE STORE

(shouting at George)
George! That's all the grocery! See
you next Friday!

GEORGE
(to Fleabag)
One sec.
(to the man outside, waving)
Okay! Thanks! See you next week! Have
a nice weekend!
(to Fleabag)
I don't usually work after hours, but
 7.

you can be an exceptional.

He walked to the cashier, turned his back to Fleabag,

searched up and down. His neck and the muscles on his arms
rolled. He reached down, turned back to Fleabag, and gave her
a name card.

GEORGE
Here's my name card. But you know,
this is my store, so we can stay as
long as we want. You can tell me what
you need and when, now. I don't mind
working a bit later to serve a beauty
like you.

FLEABAG
Uh, well, thanks, I might need to book
some grocery for my coffee shop. It's
called Guinea Coffee Shop. I need,
well, the grocery I need are on the
list.

She hand him the list. He looked down at it, and his
eyelashes were shining in the dim light. He turned on the
calculator, pushed the buttons, and looked very serious.
Seriously handsome. Fleabag stared at him, made a swallow
sound, and turned to the camera.

FLEABAG
(to the camera)
I know, this is hard.

GEORGE
Okay, I see. It would be 48.9 pounds,
a week. I'll make it to 47, because
you're cute, and it's my shop.

He looked at Fleabag, blew a whistle, and winked at her.

GEORGE(CONT'D)
When do you want me to deliver the
groceries? I can deliver it to you
tomorrow if you're in a hurry. This
list seemed to be a long one.

FLEABAG
Well, once two weeks? Tomorrow would
be fine, if possible.
 8.

GEORGE
(doubtful)
Once, two weeks? Wow, those things
couldn't last a week. Your cabinet
would be empty on the third day.

FLEABAG
(embarrassed)
I just start the business, so there's
not quite much customers.

GEORGE

He stared at her for a while, and laughed.A quite dramatic

one, which he showed his upper and lower teeth.

IF you insist so. BUT remember to CALL

me whenever you need help in your
store.

FLEABAG
Thanks.Will do.

She picked out her wallet, took out the money. When she gave
it to him, his hands overlapped hers. His fingers stopped at
her fingers, tickled her fingers for less than a second, and
took the money. Fleabag blushed, took her hands away quickly,
and leaned down, pretending to put back her wallet. George
counted money, leaned down, put it in the cashier, and turned
to her.

GEORGE
I don't really do this a lot, but,
since we know each other now, would
you want to come to the Crossfire bar
tonight, and have a little drink with
my friends? They are all nice people,
I promise. Just drinking and chatting.
Some of them open coffee shops as
well. You might want to meet them.
Have a little tgif, you seemed very
distressed and exhausted.

FLEABAG
(cleared throat, vulnerable)
I would consider. Thanks, anyway, er,
(looked at the name tag)
George.

GEORGE
No problem, I'll wait. But don't
 9.

rush. Take your time, we got the whole

evening.

Fleabag looked at George, stared at his eyes. Her lips moved,

as if she wanted to say something. The camera zoomed in, the
the face of George became even more clear. After a while, the
camera stopped moving, and she looked down, turned back, and
waved at him.

George waved at her, smiling.

The camera went back to Fleabag's back. She walked quickly,

and the yellow light from the grocery store became dimmer.

EXT. DAD'S HOUSE'S FRONT DOOR - LATER

Fleabag took a deep breath. Her shoulders went up, and then
went down. She then rang the bell, looked at bushes where she
help the cat to escape, and then looked back at the door.

Step mother came to the door, and seemed to be surprised.

STEP MOTHER
Wow, honey, I didn't expect you to
come.

FLEABAG
(shrugged)
Me neither.It's not on the list.

STEP MOTHER
(frown)
Excuse me, what?

FLEABAG
Nothing. Just, just want to apologize
for ruining your, sex-hibition. IT was
amazing anyway.

STEP MOTHER
(pat Fleabag's shoulders, hard)
Well, I didn't really expect that
coming. But you did a great work
cleaning up the mess you made for me.
And maybe you would need some tips?
for that shining floor? Oh wait, you
already got yours.

She stared at Fleabag. Her palms faced her body, and pointed
 10.

at her own body with her palms, clearly implying the statue
Fleabag took from her.

FLEABAG
(ignoring her)
Thanks, check and cash are both fine.

Fleabag's father showed up in the scene. He looked

frightened, clearly not expecting her to show up here.

FATHER
(awkward)
Oh, hey, what are you doing here.

FLEABAG
Nothing, just coming to say hello.

FATHER
Uh, well, your sister is also here, so
if you don't mind, you can join for
the dinner.She's, uh, having some
trouble recently.

Step mother poked father's waist. But the father didn't say
one more word, but just stared at Fleabag.

FLEABAG
Okay, then.

She went in. Step mother walked beside her, smiling in a

creepy way at her.

STEP MOTHER
So, how are you doing with that cute
guy you brought here last time? Did
things work out for you? Or did you
just scared him away like you scared
away poor Harry?

FLEABAG
He like big tits.

STEP MOTHER
(dramatically covering her mouth)
Oh, I'm so, so sorry to hear that.You
must feel very bad, don't you? It's
not that easy for a girl like you to
encounter another brilliant guy like
that.

Fleabag wasn't talking. Her face was emotionless. She stared

 11.

at the hallway, walked, and didn't say one single word on the
way.

Then the camera turned to the kitchen. Claire, Fleabag's

sister and Claire's husband were there, arguing about
something.

As soon as Fleabag showed up, the room became silent.Both

Claire and her husband were staring at Fleabag. Step mother
noticed that, and stared at Fleabag as well.

It went on for a few seconds.

FLEABAG
Hi.

Claire's lips moved for a bit, but Claire's husband spoke

before her.

CLAIRE'S HUSBAN
(sarcastic)
Haven't heard from you since the
exhibition. Did you apologize for
frightening the guests, or telling
stupid lies?

FLEABAG
Not really. And I'm not thinking about
apologizing for telling the truth.
(stared at Claire)
How's Finland?

CLAIRE'S HUSBAN
(angry)
Shut the fuck up. You know she didn't
go. You son of a liar. Why would I
kiss some, flat chest person as ugly
as you? What's the point of your
lying? Are you jealous of other people
who have a family? Is that what you
want? Sleeping with other people's
partner? Is it happy for you to see us
divorce? YOU really need someone to
show up in your lonely life to
accompany you. You pathetic slut.

FLEABAG
I didn't lie. I-
 12.

CLARIE
(crossed arms, frowned sadly)
He's right. Shut the fuck up.

Fleabag shrugged. She stared at Claire. Claire slowly looked

down.Her father showed up in the kitchen, looked at the four
people, didn't say a work, and then also looked down. Step
mother stared at her really hard, and Claire's husband was
also staring at her.She turned around, knock over a vase, and
ran out of the house. Step mother followed, yelled at her.

STEP MOTHER
That's the only one on this planet!

Fleabag's father came behind step mother.

FATHER
So no dinner. Need a cab?

FLEABAG
No, thanks dad. I should fucking stick
with the list I wrote.

Fleabag ran out to the street, tears are coming from her
face. She wiped them out. Some guys on the street whistled at
her.

She walked down the street. And then she turned back, headed
to the bar.

INT. THE CROSSFIRE BAR - LATER

Fleabag walked in. Her tears are already dry. She saw George
and his friends sitting at the bar and whistling. She waved
at them, and joined them.They talked, drank, and laughed at
lame things.

FLEABAG
Hi George, mind if I buy you some
drink?

GEORGE
(surprised)
Wow. Cool, of course.Thanks.

FLEABAG
(to the bartender)
Vodka shots! For this young man!