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Conflict Model of Positive Psychotherapy

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DOI: 10.1007/978-3-030-33264-8_27

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 #ONFLICT

OPERATIONALIZATION
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 $R
-AKSIM
'ONCHAROV
Dr. Maksim Goncharov, MD, PhD is a well-known psychiatrist and
psychotherapist in the far east of Russia. He is a board member of the
World Association of Positive Psychotherapy (WAPP), World and European

International Academy of Positive and Transcultural Psychotherapy

(IAPP), and an advisory board member for International Journal of
Psychotherapy. He is a member of the World Council of Psychotherapy
(WCP), European Association of Psychotherapy (EAP), World Association
of Positive Psychotherapy (WAPP) and director of Far Eastern branch of
Russian Professional Psychotherapeutic League (PPL).
 He is the director of a private clinic «Center for Positive
Psychotherapy» in the Far East of Russia.

Dr. Maksim Goncharov graduated from Far Eastern State Medical

University in 1996; received fundamental education in psychotherapy in
Russia and Wiesbaden Academy of Psychotherapy, Transcultural Family
Therapy and Psychosomatic Medicine (Germany). In 2000, he became
an international trainer of Positive Psychotherapy. In 2002 he was

his PhD on psychotherapy in St. Petersburg. For 17 years, he has been

continuously practicing psychotherapy and is a member of the board of
directors of the World Association of Positive Psychotherapy (Wiesbaden,
Germany). He is director of a private therapy clinic «Center of Positive
Psychotherapy» in Khabarovsk region. In 2007, Maksim Goncharov was
awarded with an international prize from the International Academy
of Positive and Transcultural Psychotherapy (IAPP) for innovations in

Psychotherapy.

Now he actively provides trainings in Russia, Ukraine, Germany,

Turkey, Romania, China, Australia and Albania.
 Content
About the author

Foreword 8

thanks and acknowledgments 10

IntroduCtIon 13

ChApter I
17
20
21
26
26
28
31

ChApter II
35
37
37
41

ChApter III
45
46

ChApter IV
51

ChApter V
61
64
64
64
65

reference 67
8

Foreword to the book

Dr. Maksim Goncharov has presented an important book. The increase

tutes»1
2

Positive Psychotherapy, founded by Nossrat Peseschkian in the 1ti70s,

method3

Wiesbaden, Germany, February 2014

Hamid Peseschkian, MD, DM, DMSc, IFAPA

1
Kernberg, O. F. (2012). Suicide prevention for psychoanalytic institutes and societies. Journal of
the American Psychoanalytic Association, 60, 707-719.
2
Linley, P.O. (2006). Positive psychology: Past, present, and (possible) future. The Journal of
Positive Psychology; 1(1): 3–16
3
Peseschkian, H, A. Remmers (2013). Positive Psychotherapie. Reinhardt Verlag, München
 4HANKS
AND

ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

Thank God, I did it!

I’ve never been a very diligent student. Patience and diligence were
never my strong character traits. I had to learn this in the course of life
and I’m still not sure if I have reached the mark. However, writing a book,
even a small one like this, I have needed these qualities. I still do not really
understand how I did it.
So, thank God, I did it!

I am immensely grateful to my dear teacher professor Nossrat

Peseschkian and his dear wife Manije that they appeared in my life. I think

Positive Psychotherapy, not only as a professional specialist, but also as a

way of life. The Peseschkian’s family became a second family for me. I saw a
great example of love, loving life, kindness and generosity, which I had never
experienced to that extent. They showed me what loving all of humanity
means and what it means to be of service to mankind.

Big thanks to Hamid Peseschkian for his responsiveness, honesty,

inspiration and support. He did not just give me the suggestion theme of
‘Emotional Security’ for my dissertation, which produced «The atmosphere
of emotional security in the practice of psychotherapist» (ISBN: 978-3-659-
26215-9), but also encouraged me to get involved in science and publish more.

I am especially grateful to my friends and colleagues Ivan Kirillov,

Pavel Frolov and Arno Remmers, who have found the time, energy and
enthusiasm to discuss ideas, doubts and difficulties with me. Disputes,
disagreements, criticisms encouraged me to seek answers and new solutions,
different formulations, and then discuss it with them again. I recall this time
with gratitude and admiration. We still have things to talk about and explore.

I give many thanks to my many other friends and colleagues; Gabrielle

Hum, Christian Henrichs, Enver Cesko, Tuba Sari, Gunther Hobner, Vladimir
Karikash, Navid Peseschkian and many others for their dedicated work in
developing and promoting the method of Positive Psychotherapy during
these many years.

Thanks to my students who sometimes ask questions that I did not

dare to ask, and encouraged me to seek for more convincing answers and
examples. Very inspiring were their reactions to the metaphors I used and
attempts to explain something that possibly I hardly understood myself.

Special thanks to my wife and sons, who allowed me to devote the

necessary time it took for me to write this book. They supported and helped
me throughout, more than they know.

Thanks to my mom, who has always been a model of optimism and

support in everything I got involved in.

Great thanks to my friend and colleagues Theo Cope and John Sutton
who made my English readable, and thus the book available to others.

Thanks to all mankind, the need for greater unity and the need for
 13

IntroductIon

Positive Psychotherapy is quite a new method which was

created in 1968. In this year (2013) it celebrates 45 years of development
and its creator, a German professor with Iranian background nossrat
Peseschkian would celebrate his 80th birthday. during the last 45 years
Positive Psychotherapy has obtained world recognition and became

proved effectiveness.

one of the most significant advantages of the method of

Positive Psychotherapy is the simplicity of its terminology and
accessibility for understanding by almost any person. In today’s world
there are so many wonderful psychological theories. However, most of

tool for self-help.

nossrat Peseschkian made an enormous contribution to the

development of modern psychotherapy. All that now seems to be
absolutely natural and ordinary, in 1968 was it simply impossible or at

who operationalized the use of metaphors in psychotherapy, by

describing its meaning and its functions. He introduced the concept
of capabilities to psychodynamic psychotherapy and made it central
for psychotherapeutic work. He also described a model, which includes
the four dimensions of human life: body/health, activity/achievements,
contacts/relationships and the meaning/future, thereby anticipating
the transition from the bio-psycho- social approach to bio-psycho-
socio-spiritual approach, the need for which now discussed more and
more often. His balance model was included in the personality structure
model described in the operationalized Psychodynamic diagnostics by
G. rudolf (1993). It is known that rudolf had been working for some
14

period of time with professor Peseschkian and apparently this work

brought some inspiration to Rudolf.
A transcultural approach is a fundamental concept of Positive
Psychotherapy; now the practice of a transcultural approach is the
main attribute of the globalization process as it affects psychotherapy.
Peseschkian also advocated a positive interpretation, as a discovery
of the functions of symptoms and meaning and reinterpretation
of the body language which is now an integral part of almost any
psychotherapy system.
In general, Positive Psychotherapy does not have a very large,
complex theoretical framework. However, it is very deep. Like all
geniuses, Nossrat Peseschkian described just the basic concepts and
just partially revealed them. This is a common story. Usually, it was
the students and followers who learned from the founder and had an

this experience be clearly described and conveyed to the following

generations.
For instance, in the books of Nossrat Peseschkian that mainly

described were actual, basic and the key conflict. However, their
operationalization was presented in rather general terms: reaction

and was taught just in the training process; the concept of personality
structure generally appeared only in recent years.

This opens up the possibility for a broader interpretation of

different constructs the founder left, that on the one hand allows us
to get some new ideas, and on the other can lead to disagreements
and misunderstandings and make the educational process more
complicated.
 15

Psychotherapy today has three main trends:

1) Humanization - the desire to make psychotherapy more

humane and focused on the unfoldment of all the fullness of human
nature;
2) Transculturalism - the desire to answer the question of what
do all people have in common and how do they differ;
3) Operationalization - the desire to make psychotherapy more
available for description and measurement.

With the first two trends Positive Psychotherapy is quite

well developed. The third one still requires much effort. For this
reason, I want to share my vision of the operationalization in Positive
Psychotherapy.

clash, to strike together) refers to the concurrence of different positions

a quarrel or a scandal, as is often understood by people. Rather, it is

the difference between the desired and what is actually happening.

constantly, they are always with us. However, not all of them have a

into useful categories. In Positive Psychotherapy there are four kinds

for diagnostics; this is very important for practical work.

 17

chapter I

!CTUAL
CONFLICT

I chronic situations happening in the present time; for example

professional changes or circumstances, family events such as divorce

the problematic situation could have begun a long time ago,

18
 19

Thus, we arrive at the fact that the

An actual
20

In psychotherapy procedures, we try to go backwards and make

to work through the cause of the symptoms.

 21

Typically, a person can relatively easily describe the impact of this event
on his life situation and tell us the exact time of its occurrence. When
psychiatrists question the patient about life before the disorder, they

is an American research team led by Holmes and Rahe, which created

and power of the stress effects, and assess the degree of potential risk
of the disorders. However, not all people are equally responsive to the
same stresses. The magnitude of stress and the extent of the negative
impact depend on the individual and cultural features of a concrete
person. This should be considered in practical work with clients.

one this is an accumulation of insignificant events, for example,

unpunctuality of a partner, unreliability and injustice of subordinates,

a trivia that life operates on the principle of «a steady drop breaks a

the time of this event’s appearance, and argues rather broader temporal
categories: «we fought during the past few years», «our relationship

lead to retraumatization, depletes resources, actualizes the situation

external stress, overload, and personally determined capabilities.

Four dimensions of life in Positive

Psychotherapy

According to the concept of Positive Psychotherapy, we have

just four domains that can describe the whole of human life. Each of
these domains covers a large part of our lives, albeit in a very different
ways. We attach different importance to these domains and dispose of
them unequally also.
22

Pic. 5 Model of four domains of life

The way a person disposes these four areas of life can be

explored using the balance model. Distributing 100% of all available
life power or energy among four areas of life we can get a graphical
representation of the subjective picture of one’s life and get a better

of the basic concepts.

Pic. 6 The balance model

 23

Study of the balance model allows us to evaluate not just the

current life situation but also how the model has changed in response
to certain life circumstances (macro-trauma), and thus to see the
dynamics. In addition, subsequent measurements will evaluate the
therapeutic effect of psychotherapy.
Despite all of the cultural and social differences and peculiarities
of each person, we can observe that all people apply the same forms of

problems (we get angry, become depressed and feel misunderstood, live

can be expressed in these four areas of life. It gives a picture of how

people perceive themselves and the world around and what way the
recognition and control of the reality goes. In other words, these four

1) «Escape into disease» or «escape into body/symptoms» implies

ailments, begins to care more about the body and health, tries hard to lose

«eat over the grief», refusal of food - «slimming mania»), sexuality (Don
Juanism, nymphomania or abstaining from sex), functional disorders and
24

psychosomatic reactions. Besides that, the episodes of secondary gain from

When a person releases energy from one area, for example

Headaches, gastrointestinal disorders, sleep disorders,

rheumatic diseases, pain, asthma, cardiac pathology, sexual disorders,

today considered in terms of experiencing and processing the mental

psychosomatic disorders can be distributed on this model.

Pic. 8 Spreading the mental and psychosomatic disorders on the model of four areas of life
 25

Normally, all the ways are available to us as a resource

26

the object which it was originated with, and on the subject which it

we should strive to learn how to manage them.

Operationalization

Since Positive Psychotherapy is a psychodynamic method, we

do not dwell just on the symptoms, such as fear or depression, but try
to answer the question: «What is behind these symptoms that is the

2) Content

First diagnostic aspect

the actual conflict, we use a model of the four domains of life of

Schematically it can be presented as follow:

27
28

Second diagnostic aspect:

 29

are divided into two categories: the secondary and primary

capabilities.
Secondary capabilities are associated with the transmission of

the values and norms of the social group of the individual. These
includes: punctuality, orderliness, cleanliness, obedience, courtesy,
honesty, thrift, justice, faithfulness, diligence, reliability, accuracy, and
conscientiousness.
Primary capabilities represent the basic capacity to love, and

people. These include: love, patience, model, time, contact, sexuality,

Table 1 Actual capabilities.

30

Besides the above-mentioned functions, the actual capabilities

Example: the actual conflict is located in the domain of

achievements, in the content of actual conflict: reliability and

This means that the client, in the domain of achievements, for

by the secondary actual capabilities, as they are behavioral norms and

 31

Third diagnostic aspect:

32

«When I repeatedly explain to my subordinate what I expect from him,

talk to someone about it.»

Due to the fact that the client is able to share his/her emotional

to normality.
The conflict and reaction to conflict should be clearly

such as «contacts», and can be processed in a completely different area,

chances for resolution, because it remains intact.

 35

chapTer II

"ASIC
CONFLICT

T he cause of our failures are often our so called ‘life concepts’, which
indeed are our inherited family concepts, and which in psychology
or psychotherapy are termed basic concepts because they are planted
into the foundation of our life that is our childhood. These concepts are
in other words ingrained and deep-seated views to a life transmitted

people by means of being models as a life manual.

What are life concepts? These concepts are the emotional and

to ourselves, to others and the environment. It’s also a kind of belief

about how the world operates and how to deal with it. In other words,
they are psychological lenses through which we observe reality and
understand our attitude to it. That’s why the concepts sometimes sound
like a motto or a slogan.
norms and habits, which we focus on. So, it is not a surprise
now that they have such a big impact on our lives. These concepts
for quite a long time may not have been made conscious. We are
simply not aware of them. This is due to the fact that as children we
have no other alternatives and take them for granted. They become
noticeable to us just through the clash with the reality that differs

the emotional needs and to serve as a reliable guide. When we are

kids, we do not have much choice in what is offered as facts of life,
we simply accept them.
36

Hence, perhaps it becomes clearer now that not everything

that we passed through would be helpful for us at all times. Time is
changing. As they say, ”not all yogurts are the same ”, so not all family

Some of them are great help and facilitate our lives, while others turn

and problems.
Fortunately, not each family concept will become a conflict
in the future. Some concepts are potentially more conflictual than
others. For example, the concept «a happy life is possible only if you
have got high education» will be much narrower and potentially
more conflictual than the concept, «happiness is possible in any
case.» Not having a possibility, for different reasons, to get higher
education, a person may assume that he or she is doomed to
misfortune, and the fact of a lack of education will testify that one
is unhappy. In order to make life happier, this person will have to
overcome a lot of doubts related to prior beliefs, but it is better to
call them superstitions.
Concepts are always built around values, and as it is well known,
values are not always universal but rather culturally determined. In
other words, what is valued in one culture may have absolutely no
value in another. This is normal and natural. Now it becomes clearer
how many problems we make up and invent by ourselves and thereby

Here are some examples of other family concepts:

«You are worth something when you achieve something»

«Partnership is hard work»
«My children have to live better than I do» «My child should
live as well as I lived» «My child must be better than me»
«God will punish you»
«All human beings are good by nature» «Do not trust anyone»
«You can only trust relatives» «Guests just bring expenses»
«Compassion would not be enough for everybody»
…and so forth.
 37

Family concepts that served very well in our childhood can

functions to satisfy our emotional needs. So, then, we can see that

conditions:
38

were a child; 2) concept of «You» - the attitudes of our parents to each

other when we were a child; 3) concept of «We» - the attitudes of our
parents towards the world around and the social environment when we
were a child; and 4) concept of «Primary-We» - the attitudes of parents
towards a worldview, the questions of the meaning of life at the time,
when we were a child. This is schematically represented as follows:

Pic. 17 Four dimensions of relationships

Thus, these four categories of concepts describe the four

dimensions of relationships: attitude to ourselves, the attitude to the
partnership, the attitude to society and the attitude to the worldview.
Accordingly, this attitude becomes the starting point for us in the future
shaping of our own attitude to all these dimensions of relationships.

The concept «I» contains representations of ourselves, about

ourselves, our own values and their importance. It describes what we
encourage ourselves for and what we punish ourselves for. Besides, this

I trust myself», «I always need someone who would help me», «First
me, then all the others», «I am a loser. I am an untalented person», «So
what, anyway everything is meaningless».
The concept «You» describes our ideas of partnership. It is
 39

function and to be supported. The model for this is the example which
was given to us by our parents in their relation to each other.
Examples: «I want to establish the same harmonious family as
my parents» or «I will never marry; I won’t have children and continue all
this rubbish in which my parents are engaged», «Marriage is a burden».
The concept «We» describes the developed relationship to one’s
surrounding environment and the society. Here one is concerned with
how to perceive it, what to expect and how to interact with it.
Examples: «Guests are God’s gift», «Relatives are like boots, the
more one is close to them, the more they squeeze», «You are nothing,
your people are everything», «We are on your own and others on their
own», «We all are leaves of one branch and fruits of one tree», «It is
better to have a rat in a cellar, than relatives in the house».
The concept of the «Primary-We» describes the family ideology,
which contains views to the importance of clear life goals and values,
religions, philosophies of life and worldview, that is, the fundamental
values which determine the character of life tasks.
Examples: «There is a higher power, merciful and fair», «the
World was made comfortable», «Live in pleasure, not thinking about
death and what will happen after it!»

description, can be distributed among these four categories of concepts.

Graphically it can be expressed as follow:
Concept «I am worth something when I achieve something» is
localized in the conception of «I».
40

The conception of «Marriage is the work of raising children»

describes the idea of the of partnership value and can be attributed to
the conception of «You».

The concept of «You can just trust relatives» characterizes a

friendly social group, which you can feel safe with and is attributed to
the conception of «We».

The conception of «children are the main meaning of life»

can be assigned to the conception of «Primary-We» and describes the
meaningful orientation of life.
 41

Thus, any conception formulated by the client can be attributed

The conceptions are always lined up around the values that

understand how we are treated and accepted through the time others
spend with us, how others are patient with us, how others are tender

to be loved and accepted, appreciated, praised and acknowledged,

we want to be given time and some patience for our shortcomings,

or rather quite often in the process of education, the secondary

Obedience in this case becomes a reliable way to get some time,

42

my mother was angry, my help in cleaning the house could calm her
down». Here orderliness and cleanliness allowed one to get some love,
patience, and perhaps contact.
For example, the conception we are already familiar with «I am
worth something when I achieve something» is localized in the concept
of «I», contains an element of emotional needs, expressed through
relationship (primary capability of love) and the social norms, through

Graphically it can be expressed as follows:

with two actual capabilities. One describes an emotional need that is a

primary actual capability. The second is the social norm, through which

in different combinations. If a child is raised in an atmosphere of

conditions: to study well, and help in the home, to be obedient and

diligent etc.

my mother would become kind and soft and would allow me a little
43
 45

chapTEr III

)NNER
CONFLICT

T he dominance of one or another motivation may be different

on the conscious and unconscious levels. For example, a person
can consciously intend something but act in accordance with the
inducements that are dominant on the unconscious level. In such
cases, we are dealing with a disharmonious personality that is

turn, is characterized by an individual’s predetermined patterns of

experience, which, in the respective situations, lead to continued
similar behavior patterns, without the person being aware of them, or
being able to overcome them with his or her own free will («neurotic
fixation»). Therefore, the inner conflict is also called neurotic,
emphasizing its dysfunctionality.

conditions simultaneously are external and internal. External conditions

deep and active motives and personal relationships become impossible

46

are reduced to a contradiction either between different motives

and relationships of a person, such as debt and personal interests,
or between the capabilities and aspirations of the individual. Of

spontaneously, but rather, in turn, are due to the external situation

and history of the individual.

by the simultaneous existence of opposing or even mutually exclusive

efforts, desires or ideals: for example, the desire to dissolve the marriage
due to unbearable relationships (actual situation) and a moral ban
on divorce in virtue of education (basic concept). In connection with
this the inner conflict is experienced as a temporary state of high
emotional tension, feeling unsolvable and in a deadlocked situation. This
dissatisfaction arises from the impossibility to overcome the problem
in a way that was effective for satisfaction of the emotional needs in

An inner conflict is an unconscious conflict of interest or

expectations that are unfolding inside of one personality. It is manifested

Therapeutic case example.

The actual situation: A woman, 35 years old, recently
experienced the relationship with her husband becoming worse. They

of justice, who and what kind of responsibilities are taken in their

family. Over some time they started to communicate less. The client
 47

The basic situation:

48

the domain of contacts and occurs in the relation with the husband.

succeed with the help of cleanliness, orderliness and diligence. Only

in response to these norms mother could satisfy an emotional need for
affection of a daughter. Thus, she also manages to maintain her self-

is trying to «earn», referring to the pattern of the basic concept. Here

it does not execute the functions it played in childhood: to satisfy

Here appears a symptom of high blood pressure, which performs the

a new actual situation.

 49

Psychodynamic conflicts are thus internal, unconscious

 51

+EY
CONFLICT

I
52

(AC).
 53

On this basis, «honesty» or «directness» is understood as an

ability to openly express ones’ own needs, true thoughts and feelings,
regardless of the consequences and reactions of others, an ability to
say «No» and the ability to reject, stand up for oneself and to assert,
allowing the risk of aggression. Example: «I always say what I think,
regardless of whether they like it or not.»
Besides all this, ”honesty” is one of the conditions of
verbalization. It makes an individual’s experiences available for
evaluation. However, if honesty/directness is too much, it can also
prevent proper communication. In addition, honesty is also an ability
to stay in contact with yourself, to be honest regarding your own true
manifestations (revelations). Hence sincerity is an integral part of
congruence and authenticity.
The second component, «politeness» or «courtesy»,
is understood as an ability to suppress aggression to the social
environment, the ability to avoid confrontations, the ability to take into
account the attitude of the other, the ability to say «Yes» or the ability
to accept with the cost of intuitive failure and potential emotional
reactions of fear. Example: «I’m afraid to openly express my opinion,
because I don’t want to lose my good image in the eyes of others.»
«Politeness» can be understood as the need to stay in contact
with others, the ability to maintain contact.
These two abilities, honesty and courtesy are responsible for

enhanced.
54
 55

Pic. 30 High threshold of honesty

lower its intensity, and it will be easier to manage.

Pic. 31 Low threshold of honesty

56

From the examples that Nossrat Peseschkian offers in his

clients are able to verbalize the reason they either are open (honest)
 57

vulnerable place for the following scheme of symptom occurrence:

the reactions of courtesy correspond to the endocrine and mediator
mechanisms of central nerve system (CNS) and the reaction of fear;
the reactions of honesty in CNS correspond with aggression (N.
Peseschkian, 1994). Honesty taken to an extreme extent may look like
aggression. At the same time, aggression is substantially connected
with honesty. Physiologically, honesty activates the sympathetic
nervous system (SNS) and requires from the person an active position
and readiness for action. Accordingly, the potential problems of this
person, most likely, will occur in the area of contacts and achievements.
Politeness to an extreme extent will look like fear. It activates
the parasympathetic nervous system (PNS) and leads to a passive-
defensive position. Accordingly, the potential problems, most likely,
will be located in areas of the body and fantasies, i.e. psychosomatic
and phobic or anxiety disorders.
58
 61

)NTERACTION
AND

INTERRELATION
OF
THE

CONFLICTS
IN
0OSITIVE

PSYCHOTHERAPY

T
62

Pic. 34 Iceberg model

63
64
 65

Actual capacities as cultural values are contained in all of our

66
 67

Reference:
 Author: Dr Maksim Goncharov
Translation: Dr Maksim Goncharov
English editor: Theo Cope
Design: Dmitry and Yuliya Khomenko

ISBN: 978-5-9905455-1-9

No part of this book may be reproduced, published,

performed in public, adapted, broadcast, stored in
a retrieval system or transmitted, in any form or

recording or otherwise, without written permission from

the author. Enquires should be addressed to the author:
goncharov@cpprussia.ru

Printed and bound in Khabarovsk, Russia.

680000, Promishlennaya str., 8b
Publishing trust: «Omega-Press»
The Center for Positive Psychotherapy, transcultural family therapy and
psychosomatic medicine is a private medical center specialized in working
with individuals and groups with a therapeutic focus to develop emotional
health, improved communication and holistic unity.
We base our work on theory and practice of Positive Psychotherapy method
(after Nossrat Peseschkian, 1968).
The Center for Positive Psychotherapy
project with the World Association of Positive Psychotherapy in 2001,
and is part of many world-wide centers and associations of Positive
Psychotherapy.
psychotherapy and counseling, organizational
psychotherapy and employee assistance programs; education in
psychotherapy.

international master trainers on Positive Psychotherapy.

 Dr. Maksim Goncharov

#ONFLICT
OPERATIONALIZATION


IN
0OSITIVE
0SYCHOTHERAPY

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