THE YOUNG’S TRAGEDY: TO UNWITTINGLY BECOME THE

ABHORRENT
Back to the past, we did formerly compose an article on anti-natalism
- the very movement against birth. Followers of such purported that
infants should not have been born to purely abear every life pressure,
every human competition, aging and eventually an inescapable death -
which are by no means their wishes on birth.
On the one hand, I have been all too neutral on the movement: after
all, whether to give birth or not is still contingent upon the bearers,
who, thus, should be free from every family/social pressure and the
so-called “species survival lifework”. On the other hand, however, we
also are in no situation to refrain anyone from having their own little
sweeties, irregardless of their financial status, social position or
intellectual level.
That said, I have every so often puzzled over that actual fact of
children having no right to choose whether to roll in this world, nor
any autonomy to opt for the person they want to be, or the life they
want to live.
For example, as an old proverb on “successive social order”, “the
king's son is to inherit the throne, the monk’s son is to inherit the
temple”, bizarrely enough, still is holding on to its propagated
“general truth”. Yet we are hereby not homing in such a macroscopic
issue, for every class-related issue has always been woefully
convoluted.
Instead, I am vehemently preoccupied by the fact that every youngun
holds no autonomy in determining which path to embark on, thus, the
very moment they become heedful of which is also too late [to
overthrow it]. After all, ill-temperedness, frailty, emotionalness,
inattentiveness, chronic-worrying, slow-wittedness, or every other ill-
favored inherent characteristic has been so violently hard-wired to us
that we can’t help but live with it - knowing that others, even we
ourselves fiercely despise which.
After all, seldom could we do anything to it, other than to perpetually
puzzle over our nature - which, accordingly, is woefully inferior to
others’. (All too heedless those “others” also engender a conjecture as
such).
In a high attempt to address this, this article is heading us back to the
past, to where such a thing as personality possibly hailed from.
1. The origins of human personality: precarious and overdependent on
the predecessors
There exists every theory on the evolution of personality, most of
which zero in the two critical factors behind this process: genes and
living environment.
To put into perspective, a child is born having genes bequeathed from
previous generations in the genealogy, whilst the environment on
which they thrive is also pre-set-up by adults. Therefore, to assume
that adults are entirely responsible for younguns’ personality is by no
means an exaggeration (the adults concept is not constrained to
parents only).
A dominant psychological concept even asserts that personality crops
early in every human and evolves throughout life [1]. Strikingly
enough, juvenile is the very period to propel forward the early
versions of “mature personality”, which, along with behavioral
differences, emerge long before language and consciousness are yet to
develop [2]. Also, this evidence the significance of caregivers on an
infant’s personality.
One of the most eminent theories on personality evolution is The 8
Stage of Human Development by Erik Erikson. The theory homes in
the process of personality formation and integrity through eight stages
of life. A summary of which is as follows [3]:
- Stage 1 (Trust versus Mistrust): every infant is utterly dependent
upon his or her caregivers. The child then learns to trust the world and
the people around him once his every need is responded to. And vice
versa.
- Stage 2 (Autonomy versus Shame and Doubt): This is the period
when a child gains personal control, and tasks such as learning how to
use the toilet, selecting foods and choosing toys are to earn him either
a greater sense of independence should every of which goes
swimmingly, or shame and doubt should he fail to accomplish those
very first missions.
- Stage 3 (Initiative versus Guilt): Children between three and five are
first sent to kindergarten, where they are exposed to every early
version of social interactions, thence gaining some senses of control
over their surroundings. Those encouraged in self-directed play, thus,
emerge with a sense of strong initiative, while those who are
discouraged may begin to feel a sense of guilt over their self-initiated
activities.
- Stage 4 (Industry versus Inferiority): Those entering elementary
school are also engaged in more social interactions and study-related
activities. They, thus, begin to develop a sense of pride and
accomplishment in their work and abilities, or disheartenment and
inferiority should things go against their expectations.
- Stage 5 (Identity versus Confusion): During adolescence, teens
explore different behaviors, roles, and identities. Erikson believed that
this stage was particularly crucial and that forging a strong identity
serves as a basis for finding future direction in life. Those who find a
sense of identity feel secure, independent and ready to face the future,
while those who remain confused may feel lost, insecure and unsure
of their place in the world.
- Stage 6 (Intimacy versus Isolation): The sixth psychosocial stage is
centered on intimacy versus isolation and focuses on forming
intimate, loving relationships with other people. Dating, marriage,
family, and friendships are important during the intimacy versus
isolation stage, which lasts from 19 to 40. By successfully forming
loving relationships with other people, individuals are able to
experience love and enjoy intimacy. Those who fail to form lasting
relationships may feel isolated and alone.
- Stage 7 (Generativity versus Stagnation): During middle adulthood,
the psychosocial conflict becomes centered on the need to create or
nurture things that will outlast the individual. Raising a family,
working, and contributing to the community are all ways that people
develop a sense of purpose. Those who fail to find ways to contribute
may feel disconnected and useless.
- Stage 8 (Integrity versus Despair): The final psychosocial stage is
known as integrity versus despair and it begins around the age of 65
and lasts until death. During this period of time, the individual looks
back on his or her life. The major question during this stage is, "Did I
live a meaningful life?" Those who have will feel a sense of peace,
wisdom, and fulfillment, even when facing death. For those who look
back on life with bitterness and regret, feelings of despair may result.
In general, the majority of human development stages are from
juveniles backwards. Amid the “wars” to determine our personality,
the precariousness is so cascading that we own as much as 50% to
fail, boxing ourselves in despair and depriving us of every pivotal
personality.
Withal Erikson’s theory, Freud’s psychoanalysis also conjectures that
childhood must be woefully critical in personality evolution. Other
preeminent theories have also sided with such a conclusion [4].
Given their (psychology or psychoanalysis) scientific incompleteness,
cognitive science and neuroscience, still, have propelled every
evidence to psychological damage since childhood distorting the brain
structure.
2. Beware every adult, for a sneeze of yours alone may leave
cataclysmic impacts on children
(Just kidding).
As a prevailing topic among scientists, there has been no shortage of
research and findings to prove the impact of the living environment
on children.
For example, children whose parents are often not turning up [at
parent meetings] because of work are more regularly skipping school
and in turn reprimanded by which [5]. Divorced parents also inflict
onerous impacts on their children’s future marriages, alcohol and drug
use, and odds of committing crimes or even s.u.i.c.i.d.e [6]. Fierce
arguments between parents also makes children more vulnerable to
every antisocial and depressing tendency [7]. It is not to mention
school and society bullies, or afflictions engendered by teachers
lacking pedagogical skills.
On the whole, humans are highly social creatures, thus can rarely
independently grow, nor cease ourselves to exist. From the very
moment we are born, the inherent biological mechanisms have always
been shaping how we should evolve. To demonstrate, even when the
mimic mechanism is woefully common among wild animals - by
aping can baby birds fly, or infant wolves start, humans, however, are
not thriving in a society where a toddler may imitate "the way humans
are humans" - especially upon having been deprived of every right to
determine from whom, and where he will imitate that “human thing”.
Scientists have even prompted every evidence that during the dawn of
cognitive development, the suffering of psychological trauma does
distort the brain at physical level. To put into perspective, unwanted
events such as accidents, catastrophes, deaths, failures, intimidation,
or violent/sexual attacks may bolster some brain areas in response
against stimulations, whilst others are deprived of which [8]. After all,
it is that brain distortment that shoulders our every emotional
function, which maneuvers our every behavior - for the rest of our
lives.
Another study shows that traumatic experiences may distort
memories. For example, people tend to remember more of what they
actually experienced, are easily obsessed with, and more often "re-
experience" that trauma in the future [9]. In this manner, you had
better pray for not running yourselves into a situation as such.
In general, there exist so many reasons for us being imperfect that we
all fall for those and find ourselves bottom of the barrels forsooth. On
the other hand, we are all too heedless that there still are little
possibilities of us being great humans, but every other contradicting
possibility. Thence, we are all too often falling for one or another
defect that such bugs are set woefully common.
That said, upon concurring that "no one is perfect", people still have
different attitudes towards each personality defect. For example, we
may oftentimes go with a person of weak mentality, albeit despising
the ill-tempered. In this manner, should adults be truly responsible, do
everything lest exposing their children to situations that inflict every
cascading future personality defects.
3. What should we do?
By no means should children ever be burdened with any
responsibility [for their personality]. As adulthood comes, that they
have not sued their parents for having bred an abhorrent individual
itself is a sheer luck. On the other hand, parents, nonetheless, are
always having to abear self-gnawing every time their children run
themselves into trouble.
After all, even though we know horribly well that being an adult is
arduous enough, once we propel forward a child-bearing intention, let
us painstakingly prepare in advance how our children should be
raised. Knowing that every life-level "project" is woefully arduous,
humans are still choosing to grapple with which. Among which is to
bear and rear our children.
That parents make every effort is a plan auspicious enough to ensure
children roll, with every human personality, in this precarious society.
Living with the actual fact that modern society is nowhere close to
optimum, all we can do is to wait, and to cross finger at another fact -
over history, society has been piece by piece bettered. There may
come a time when it becomes bulls eye to raise every child.
From a personal perspective, for those who are bitterly realizing that
their own personality has every not-their-fault defect since childhood,
don’t you worry. So far, every other study on personality has
evidenced that it does keep evolving during adulthood (which will
inescapably be more arduous [than we were juveniles]) [10].
After all, we are all being boxed in with "the responsibility for not-
our-fault things". Even though such a thing is unfair and by no means
pleasant, once it happens, we still have no other choice.
Even though there exists every trouble whose burden seemingly rests
on no one, should we let it be, everyone will be dogged by that very
problem.
Where you are the one to be stormed the most violently.
That is how life works, which engenders every human complaint on
"how perplexing life is".
Upon learning such a fact, what are you up to: to stay morose [at
which], to shed bitter tears, to wait for some miracles (which come
not on your lives), or to absolve everyone (including yourselves) and
put in some efforts to make your lives yours forsooth?