I have been told several times that love will leave me breathless,

I have been told how love gets cruel and painful and ugly,
But I hope to never know a love so greedy as to steal the air from lungs,
And steal the goodness from my heart,
For I have memories of a time when my body ached for every ounce of oxygen it could get,
And my lungs unable to draw in breath,
Bogged down to the cage clinging to my heart
Every thought that crosses my mind frantically lost in the sensation of drawing air inward,
No matter how loud the gasps get, nothing seems to alleviate the burning that runs through my
insides,
Or the way my limbs tingle with pins and needles and go lifeless,
And each brain cell is consumed with the desire to bind O2s with red blood cells churning inside my
veins.
Sweat drips off my thin form and pallid skin,
As I drown slowly from the inside out in a room full of doctors,
Until the tube is in its place again, to breath for me.
The pain receded as oxygen raced back into my cells.
I remember what it felt like to be truly breathless,
The blind panic that seized me,
Before finally wishing for death.
Its because of this I hope love, never empties my lungs,
I want a love that makes breathing feel safe and exciting,
A love that feels me with so much joy and marvel that I am acutely aware of the rising and falling off
my chest
A love that makes breathing feel like both, a privilege, and a right.
It is a privilege to love him and be in his presence.
But I hope he never leaves me breathless.