Marriage Indonesian-style

Level 1 Elementary

1 Key Words

Fill in the gaps in the sentences with the words below.

bride bridegroom wedding cousin cleric common
divorce (n) widower arranged marriage
1. A is a man whose wife has died.

2. A is a ceremony in which two people get married.

3. is a general word for priest.

4. An is a marriage where parents choose a husband or wife for their children.

5. A child of your uncle or aunt is your .

6. A woman who is getting married is the .

7. A man who is getting married is the .

8. Fighting between different groups of people is called a .

9. is a legal way of ending a marriage.

10. If something is it happens very often.

2 Find the information

1. How old is Yanti?

2. What is her job?
3. What does Tri do?
4. Where is Yanti from?
5. Where does Tini work?
6. How old was Tini when her parents told her to get married?

Indonesian parents still pick children’s marriage partners

by John Aglionby in Bumi Agung

Tri Cayono, aged 24, is a farmer. Yanti, aged 22, is a cook. They both live in Indonesia. Recently they got

the wedding. They had never seen each other before. Instead of being happy, they were nervous and rather
quiet. When they met they shook hands and smiled nervously. They did not kiss each other or hold hands.
The photographer asked them to kiss each other for the wedding photograph but they did not want to.

This is an example of the tradition of arranged marriage that continues to exist in many parts of Indonesia.
Tri and Yanti had never met before the wedding and they knew almost nothing about each other. “Er, what
does he like to do in his spare time?’ Yanti asked her cousin the day before the wedding.
Marriage Indonesian-style
Level 1 Elementary
Two months ago Tri told his friends and family that he wanted to marry a girl from central Java. “I think girls
from central Java are cool and more fun,” he said. But Tri didn’t know any girls from central Java. However,
this wasn’t a problem for him. A friend of Tri’s, Fajar, said he had a cousin called Mursiyati who would
be a good wife for him. Tri accepted the offer immediately. Mursiyati’s parents forced her to accept Tri’s
offer – Mursiyati’s father was pleased that Tri had some land – and she agreed to marry Tri. A month later
Mursiyati met someone she liked and she married her new boyfriend instead. But Tri still wanted to marry a

So in June the family suggested Yanti, a cousin. “When I heard her voice, saw her photo and learnt she
was a cook, I knew that she was the woman for me,” said Tri. Yanti said she was “happy and excited” about
marrying Tri, but her father, Saulusmin, was unhappy. “They haven’t even met - how can they get married?’
he said. But he did want to argue with his wife, Gina. “She will be angry with me if I say no to the marriage. It
will not be pleasant,” Saulusmin said.

It is impossible to know how many Indonesians are married in arranged marriages. Saman, the cleric who
married Yanti and Tri, said situations like this, where the couple have never met, do not happen very often.
“But there are many where the children have to do what their parents tell them,” he said. Tini, who now
works as a maid in Jakarta, ran away from home when she was 15 after her parents told her to marry a
28-year-old man. She thinks about a third of all the marriages in her district take place without the full agree-
ment of the bride and bridegroom.

World Vision, an international aid agency, says that arranged marriages are “still common” and experts say

“Parents don’t like modern ways, especially when they see that divorce rates are going up. Daughters who
listen to their parents get support. The ones that don’t listen have a much harder life.”

have died, it is traditional for their younger sisters to look after their children, and this usually means they
-
lems so a lot of people wanted to marry off their children to make their own lives easier.

Back at the wedding, Yanti told everyone she was happy. “If I don’t have to go to work again - it’s his job to
provide for me - and if I can have a couple of children, then I’ll be happy,” she said. “And I’ll probably be able
to come back and visit central Java once a year.”

3 Comprehension check 1

Put these sentences in the correct order to retell the story.

a. Unfortunately, he didn’t know any girls from central Java.
b. Unfortunately, Mursiyati married another man.
c. Finally, Tri and Yanti got married.
d. Tri wanted to marry a girl from central Java.
e. However, his friend Fajar said he had a cousin called Mursiyati who would be a good wife.
f. Luckily Fajar found another wife for Tri.
Marriage Indonesian-style
Level 1 Elementary

4 Comprehension Check 2

Match the beginnings and endings of the sentences.

1. Tri wanted to marry a girl from central Java because

2. Tri and Yanti were nervous because

3. Yanti will be happy if

4. Yanti’s father was unhappy about the marriage because

5. When women die

6. Experts believe

a. she doesn’t have to go to work and she can have a couple of children.

b. their younger sisters usually look after their children.

c. they had not met each other before.

d. the tradition of arranged marriages will probably continue.

e. he thinks they are cool and more fun.

f. his daughter hadn’t met her future husband.

5 Vocabulary Opposites

1. relaxed 5. unpleasant
2. noisy 6. traditional
3. rare 7. easier
4. unhappy 8. possible

6 Vocabulary Women and men

Complete the table.

1. man 5. son

2. bridegroom 6. boyfriend

3. husband 7. cousin

4. uncle 8. brother