G etting on with peers

R esilience building

A ssertiveness development

S taying safe

P roblem solving

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GRASP Social Skills Programme
Programme Rationale
The GRASP programme is designed to target those pupils who may be feeling
vulnerable in school, particularly with regard to intimidation or social pressures
from peers.

The programme is designed to provide pupils with a range of skills and

understanding, such as problem solving and assertive expression, which will
enable them to make confident, positive decisions in social situations with
peers.

Pupils who are at risk of succumbing to negative peer pressure, feel threatened
by the aggressive behaviour of others, have a poor self image, and/or low
confidence could benefit from the programme.

The programme’s delivery is based on social learning theory, which emphasises

that people’s learning and behaviour is shaped by their experiences and
interactions with others. Staff delivering the programme use the strategy of
positively modelling behaviour as a vehicle for learning.

The programme also draws on other psychological frameworks, such as

cognitive behavioural theory, amongst others. A list of sources which have
been consulted in order to produce the programme can be found in the
references section at the end.

The programme is suitable for pupils in Key Stage 2, although could be adapted
to target other age groups, as appropriate.

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GRASP Social Skills Programme
Pupil Selection and Monitoring
It is advised that those conducting the programme with pupils select children
for the group with care. Consideration should be given to the group dynamics,
to ensure that pupils selected will be able to work well together. Someone
with a good prior knowledge of the pupils is therefore most appropriate to
assist with selection.

An assessment tool to measure the effectiveness of the group intervention is

advised, to be administered prior to the intervention, then again shortly after
completion of the programme, so that comparisons can be made, and progress
therefore assessed.

The Strengths and Difficulties Questionnaire (SDQ), which can be accessed free
of charge online (www.sdqinfo.com), is a useful resource for this purpose. In
order to make the assessment as thorough as possible, staff should endeavour
to receive parent/carer input, by sending them versions of the questionnaire
for completion. Staff, parent and pupil versions of the SDQ are available, and
can be printed off from the website. The questionnaires can be scored by
hand, or online (www.sdqscore.net).

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GRASP Social Skills Programme
Session Outlines

Session 1: ‘Feeling Good’ Page 5

Children explore the concept of respect, and feeling proud. They examine
their strengths and things they find challenging, and discuss the notion that
everyone is unique, and this makes us special.

Session 2: ‘Express Yourself’ Page 7

Children explore the three communication styles of passive, aggressive and
assertive. They are given opportunities to practice assertive communication.

Session 3: ‘Managing Anger’ Page 10

Children explore what anger is and it’s physical signs. In the bin

Session 4: ‘Solving Problems’ Page 12

Children are provided with the ABC (antecedents, behaviour, consequences)
problem solving model, and given opportunities to practice using it.

Session 5: ‘Review’ Page 16

Children review the session material covered throughout the preceding weeks,
and have the opportunity to celebrate their progress and participation.

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 Session 1: ‘Feeling Good’
Materials:
 A4 paper
 Pencils
 Flip chart and pen
 ‘Make It Positive’ sheets
 Certificates

Welcome:
“Before we start our first activity, let’s get to know each other, because some people might
not know everyone’s name. Let’s take it in turns to say our name, and something that we
really like to do, such as a hobby or game.” (If a pupil does not wish to contribute, then
move on to the next, and let them know that this is OK).

Group Rules:
“Before we can start the activities, we need to set some rules for our group. Why do you
think that is? What do rules help us do? (Receive responses). Rules help us to get on better
together, and make sure everyone feels OK within the group. Can anyone think of a rule we
could have for our group?”

List the rules on a flip chart or large sheet of paper, reframing responses positively, as
appropriate. (E.g. If a pupil says ‘don’t kick’ say: “What will you be doing if you follow that
rule?” and reframe as ‘keep hands and feet to yourself’). Try to encourage each pupil to
provide a rule.

Make sure to include the basics: listening to each other, waiting your turn to speak, sharing,
respecting others etc. Finally, ask pupils to sign the rules in agreement.

Relaxation Activity: Trees

“Everyone stand up. Stretch your arms out sideways and make sure you have plenty of room
to yourself. Now crouch down on your knees, curl up into a ball and make yourself as small
as you can. Count down from 5…4…3…2…1… Well done! Now stretch out, stand up slowly,
reach up high and make yourself as big as you can, like a big strong tree. Count down from
5…4…3…2…1… Well done!” Repeat this exercise 3 times.

Introduce the Topic:

“Today’s topic is called ‘Feeling Good’. We are all unique and special; part of what makes us
unique is the things we are good at, and the things we find hard. It’s important to try and
be proud of the things we are good at, as this helps make us feel special. Things that we
find hard sometimes make us feel bad. We are going to learn about how to deal with the
bad feelings we might have when we find things hard, so that we feel better about it.”

Activity 1: Hand It Round

“First, we are going to remind ourselves of all the things we are good at.”

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Hand every pupil a blank sheet of A4 paper. Ask them to draw around their hand, and write
their name above it. The papers are then passed in a clockwise direction, and each pupil
writes a positive comment on everyone else’s sheet inside the hands. This continues until
every child has written a comment on everyone else’s paper.

Activity 2: Make It Positive

Give pupils a ‘Make It Positive’ sheet/ask them to turn to the relevant section in their
booklet. In the first column, ask pupils to write down things they don’t like about
themselves, or which upset them, and then in the following column, try to turn this into a
positive. If pupils do not wish to discuss the things which upset them, they can choose other
examples. Allow time afterwards for a discussion regarding the fact that for every positive
there can be a negative, and for every negative there can be a positive, depending on the
way we choose to look at it.

Read out the following negative examples, and ask pupils to think how these could be
turned into a positive, before providing possible responses:

Negative Statement Positive Statement

1. I am too tall. Everyone stares at me, and 1. Being tall makes me good at some sports
I feel silly. (e.g. basketball) and reaching things.
2. I am good at lots of other things (e.g.
2. I am rubbish at Literacy. I can’t spell or sport, maths), and have nice people to
write very well. help me with Literacy.
3. I can do other things (e.g. swimming,
3. I can’t do sport. I’m really clumsy, and running), and have different hobbies
can’t even catch a ball. other than sport.

Activity 3: Relaxation Activity

(Add Script)

Review:
“Today we have been learning about feeling good about ourselves. We have been thinking
about things that we are good at, and how to deal with the bad feelings we might have
about things we find hard.”

“Over the next week, please can you practice nice things to say to yourself which help you
feel better about things you find hard, or which upset you?”

Certificates:
Hand out certificates to pupils, and remind them that their task to practice is written on it,
for their parents/carers to help them with.

6
 Session 2: ‘Express Yourself’
Materials:
 Flip chart and pen
 Passive, aggressive, assertive cards
 ‘Being Assertive’ sheets
 Passive and aggressive sentences
 A4 paper
 Pencils
 Certificates

Group Purpose:
Reiterate this section as necessary: “Can everyone remember why we are meeting as a
group? (Wait for responses). We are meeting for 5 weeks to work on some important
social skills. Can everyone remember what social skills are? (Check understanding). They
are the things that help us get on with and talk to other people.”

Relaxation Activity: Square Breathing

“Everyone push your chairs out from your tables slightly. Sit up straight in your chair, put
your feet flat on the ground, feel your back touch the back of the chair, relax your shoulders
and put your hands flat on your knees. Now, close your eyes and think about your
breathing. Listen to your breath going in and out of your body. Feel the air moving in and
out of your lungs. Breathe in through your nose and out through your mouth. Now open
your eyes” Show the group the breathing square . “Follow my finger with your breathing,
breathe in (side of rectangle) and breathe out (length of rectangle)”. Repeat several times.
Give each child a breathing square to practice with.

Review of Last Week

“Before we look at what we will be learning about this week, let’s see if we can remember
what we learnt last time. Can everyone remember what we learnt about last week? We
looked at friendships, and the skills we need to be good friends. Can anybody remember a
friendship skill? Did anybody practice one? (Receive responses, and provide praise). We
also learnt about bullying and the things you can do and say to help deal with it. Did
anybody see any bullying? If so, did they try saying or doing any of the things we talked
about last week to help?” (Receive responses, and provide praise).

Introduce the Topic:

“Today’s topic is called ‘Express Yourself’. We are going to look at the way we talk, and
learn about the best ways of saying things so that we can get what we want without
upsetting other people.”

Activity 2: What’s the Style?

“Today we are going to look at 3 different ways of communicating. Communication includes
the words we say, how we say them, and our body language. The ways we speak, and the
messages we give to others with our bodies are as important as the words we say.

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The first type of communication we will look at is ‘aggressive’. When we are aggressive, we
do not seem to care about other people’s feelings as much as our own, and only bother
about getting our own way, or making our point.

The second way of communicating that we will look at is ‘passive’. When we communicate
passively, we do not seem to care about our own feelings as much as the other person’s.
We end up not really getting what we want. We might feel like we don’t deserve to be
heard, and care more about not upsetting other people than getting our point of view
across.

The last way of communicating that we will look at is ‘assertive’. When we communicate
assertively, we show that we care about the feelings of others and ourselves equally. This is
the best way of communicating, as you are less likely to upset other people, get to say how
you feel, and are more likely to get what you want, meaning that everyone can be happier.

We are now going to look at some of the things we might say or do for each type of
communication style.”

Place the ‘passive’, ‘aggressive’ and ‘assertive’ headings cards in the middle of the table.
Ask children to pick one card at a time each, containing a word or phrase, and place it in the
category they think it belongs. Discuss each one in turn as a group, and decide on the most
appropriate category, using the initial definitions as a guide.

Activity 3: Staff Role Play

Staff role play several scenarios. These could be situations such as taking a faulty product
back to the shop, or making a complaint in a restaurant. One staff member is the customer,
and the other is the owner. The customer needs to take it in turns to be aggressive, passive
and assertive in the ways they communicate, and the owner responds accordingly. Pupils
need to attempt to identify the communication style in each instance. A small group
discussion can follow after each role play, exploring the language used, and what the
customer was communicating to the owner through tone of voice, body language, eye
contact etc.

Activity 4: Being Assertive

Discuss with pupils words and phrases which help with assertive communication. Look over
the ‘being assertive’ sheet.

Give pupils a list of sentences containing aggressive or passive sentences. Pupils need to try
and convert them into an assertive communication. This can be done individually, in
writing, or as a group discussion, depending on ability levels of the group, and preferred
learning styles.

Activity 5: Pupil Role Play

Ask pupils to think about things they find hard to be assertive with. It could be saying ‘no’ to
something their friend wants them to do, standing up to a bully, or asking a teacher for help.
Brainstorm examples on the flipchart.

8
Give pupils the opportunity to practice assertive communication. Ask them to work in pairs,
and role play a situation of their choosing from the flipchart. Pupils need to take it in turns
being the assertive child.

Review:
“Today we have been learning about how we communicate. We have talked about the
three different types of communication- passive, aggressive and assertive, and practiced
being assertive.”

“Over the next week, please can you practice being assertive? Pay attention to what your
body is doing (eye contact etc.), and try to do some of the things we talked about on the
‘being assertive’ sheet. Everyone try to remember one example of being assertive for next
week.”

Certificates:
Hand out certificates to pupils, and remind them that their task to practice is written on it,
for their parents/carers to help them with.

9
 Session 3: ‘Managing Anger’
Materials:
 Flip chart and pen
 Different coloured pens
 Pencils
 Paper
 Volcano in my tummy worksheet
 Certificates

Group Purpose:
Reiterate this section as necessary: “Can everyone remember why we are meeting as a
group? (Wait for responses). We are meeting for 5 weeks to work on some important
social skills. Can everyone remember what social skills are? (Check understanding). They
are the things that help us get on with and talk to other people.”

Relaxation Activity: Muscle Relaxation

“Sit comfortably, close your eyes and think of nothing. Now make your hands into fists, go
on really squeeze those fists. Feel that tight feeling,----- feel that tight feeling. ------ And now
relax. ----- Think of that lovely feeling of relaxation. Now make yours toes into fists, really
scrunch up those toes. Feel that tight feeling ----- Feel the tight feeling ---- And now relax.
---- Think of that lovely feeling of relaxation. Keep your eyes closed. Now we are going to
check each part of your body to see if there is any tightness. Think of your hands and arms
if there is any tightness just let go of it. Now check your shoulders neck and face. If you find
any tightness just let go. Check your back and shoulders, your legs and feet. If you find any
tightness just let go. You should now be feeling wonderful and relaxed. Just enjoy that
wonderful feeling and when you feel ready open your eyes”

Review of Last Week

“Before we look at what we will be learning about this week, let’s see if we can remember
what we learnt last time. Can everyone remember what we learnt about last week? We
looked at the way we communicate. Can anybody remember the three styles of
communication? (Receive responses, and provide praise). That’s right; they’re ‘passive’,
‘aggressive’ and ‘assertive’. Can anybody give an example of when they have practised
being assertive over the last week?” (Receive responses, and provide praise).

Introduce the Topic:

“Today’s topic is called Managing Anger. We are going to think about what anger is and how
we feel when we become angry.

Activity 2: What is anger?

As a group brainstorm on a flip chart what they think anger means. Praise answers. “Anger
is an emotion, and everyone feels angry sometimes, it is normal and healthy. When anger is

10
bottled up it can become explosive. Using violence to show anger is not ok but safely
showing anger is healthy.”

Activity 3: Volcano in my tummy

“When were feeling angry, it can show on our faces and we can feel it on our bodies. If
someone was angry how would they be feeling inside their head? What do you think their
hands would be doing? On your worksheet is a person, I would like you to draw a picture of
what someone who is angry would look like. You can draw or use words.” Ask students what
they feel when they feel angry.

Activity 4: In the bin

Ask children to write a list of names that make them feel angry. Then the group sit in a circle
with an imaginary or real bin in the middle. Using the list of things that make the children
angry, select one belonging to one of the children and ask them to call you that name. If for
instance being told, “Your Mum is a slag” particularly offends Jimmy then ask Jimmy to say it
to you. Respond by talking the phrase out. For instance: “You don’t know my Mum so you
can’t know. My Mum is not a slag she is a very nice person and I love her. What you’re
saying is a load of rubbish, in the bin! Use hand gestures to symbolise screwing up rubbish
and throwing it into the bin).”

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 Session 4: ‘Solving Problems’
Materials:
 Flip chart and pen
 A4 paper
 Different coloured pens
 Pencils
 Certificates

Group Purpose:
Reiterate this section as necessary: “Can everyone remember why we are meeting as a
group? (Wait for responses). We are meeting for 5 weeks to work on some important
social skills. Can everyone remember what social skills are? (Check understanding). They
are the things that help us get on with and talk to other people.”

Relaxation Activity: Your Safe Place

Get comfortable and gently close your eyes. Slowly take three deep breaths, in through your
nose and out through your mouth. Spend a moment or two, relaxing your feet and legs. 
Letting go of any tightness and letting them become heavy and relaxed. Now relax your
tummy, chest, and shoulders.  Feel how relaxed you are.

Imagine you are standing in front of a massive tree.  This tree has deep, deep roots and
branches that reach out in every direction. This tree is home to your very own treehouse. 
This is a treehouse of your own design.  Picture how you would like your treehouse to look.
(Pause between each idea) You can add swings, windows, trapdoors, plants, animals, your
favorite things, your favorite colors, just allow yourself to design the treehouse anyway you
like.
Can you see it?  Good.  Now allow yourself to travel inside the treehouse. (Pause) Are you
inside?  Good.
Inside the treehouse, imagine anything that makes you feel good to think about.  Place
pillows, waterfalls, plants, trees, birds, pictures of mountains, anything that you would like
that you feel good when you think about it.  Go ahead and design the inside of your
treehouse now.
Know that when you go inside your treehouse you feel really really relaxed.  This is a place
to let go of all your thoughts, all your worries.
Take a deep breath and allow yourself to feel very peaceful and relaxed inside your
treehouse.
This is a place that you can go any time you would like to feel more peaceful and calm. 
Know that your treehouse is available to you any time you would like.  You can visit here
whenever you would like.
Now take a deep breath and imagine yourself walking down out of your treehouse.  Gently
bring your attention back to the room. You can open your eyes whenever you are ready.

Review of Last Week

“Before we look at what we will be learning about this week, let’s see if we can remember
what we learnt last time. Can everyone remember what we learnt about last week? We

12
looked at what anger means and how it can make our bodies feel. Can anybody remember
what can happen when we feel angry? (Receive responses, and provide praise). Remember
that anger is an emotion that everyone feels. It’s okay to get angry. Can anybody give an
example of when they have been angry in the last week???” (Receive responses, and
provide praise).

Introduce the Topic:

“Today’s topic is called ‘Solving Problems’. We are going to look at the types of problems
we have, and how we can help to solve them in good ways. Sometimes, people find it hard
to know how to solve their problems, so they might make bad choices, or always have to ask
someone else for help. We are going to learn about a way which can help us choose the
best choice to make for ourselves when we have a problem. Dealing with problems well can
help us to get on with other people and not fall out.”

Activity 1: Relaxation
(Add script)

Activity 1: What’s the Problem?

“Everybody has problems sometimes. There are all sorts of different problems. Let’s listen
to a few (read a selection):

 Someone talks to you in class, you tell them to be quiet and the teacher tells you off for
talking
 Someone calls you a nasty name, it makes you angry.
 Someone at school keeps calling you names. It makes you want to miss school.
 Your friends all keep falling out and asking you to take sides.
 You don’t know what to do next, but the teacher is busy.
 Your older brother wants to watch a different TV programme than you.

“What other sorts of problems might there be? Try to think of things that you have a
problem with at school.” (Receive examples, and write on the flip chart).

Activity 2: Problem Solving Brainstorm

“Let’s choose a problem that most people might have had. Look at the problems on the
board.”

Go through each problem, and ask children to put their hands up if it’s been a problem for
them. Select the problem that seems to be the most common. On a piece of flipchart
paper, write the problem in a bubble in the middle.

Ask children for all the possible solutions to the problem, positive AND negative. Write
responses around the edge. Ask children to decide if the solution is positive or negative,
and write the two in different colours. Explain that these are the ‘actions’ or ‘choices’ that a
person can make.

Once this is done, go through the solutions one at a time, and ask children what might
happen in each instance. Explain that these are the ‘consequences’. Again, record all

13
responses. The finished brainstorm should enable you to be able to select one or two
positive courses of action. An example brainstorm is shown below:

14

They might speak
to the children and
ask them to stop.
Tell an adult.
Being called names by someone.
Cry.
They might pick on
you more. They
might laugh at you.
They might call you
more names. You
You might get into might get into
trouble. You could trouble. It might
get hit back harder.
end in a big fight.
Call them names
Hit them.
back.
Ignore them. Ask them nicely
to stop.
They might get They might carry on
bored and stop. anyway. They
might stop.
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Activity 3: Safe ways to get angry
Provide children with a ‘ways to get angry sheet’.
“Feeling angry is okay, but violence and abuse is a behaviour and that’s not okay.” Ask them
to think of things they can do when there angry to safely deal with their feelings. Possible
responses include, tell others how you feel, complain, talk to someone, do something
physical, figure out a peaceful way of changing things. Ask students to read one idea to the
group.

Review:
“Today we have been learning about how to solve problems when we are angry. We have
talked about the types of things that might make us angry and safe ways to behave when
we are feeling angry.”

Over the next week, please can you practice trying to solve problems? Take one problem
that makes you feel angry, and do a brainstorm for it, like we have done today.”

Certificates:
Hand out certificates to pupils, and remind them that their task to practice is written on it,
for their parents/carers to help them with.

16
 Session 5: ‘Review’
Materials:
 Flip chart and pen
 A4 paper
 Pencils
 Feel Good Shield
 Quiz sheets
 Questionnaires
 Certificates

Group Purpose:
Reiterate this section as necessary: “Can everyone remember why we are meeting as a
group? (Wait for responses). We are meeting for 5 weeks to work on some important
social skills. Can everyone remember what social skills are? (Check understanding). They
are the things that help us get on with and talk to other people.”

Relaxation Activity: Favourite Activity

Help the group to choose their favourite relaxation activity and repeat this one for the final
session.

Review of Last Week

“Before we look at what we will be doing today, let’s see if we can remember what we
learnt last time. (Receive responses, and provide praise). We looked at solving problems
when we are angry, and used a problem solving brainstorm to help us work out what to do.
Can anybody give an example of a problem they have tried to solve this week? Did you do
anything differently because of using the brainstorm to help you?” (Receive responses, and
provide praise).

Introduce the Topic:

“We are not going to learn about anything new today, because it is our last week. Instead,
we are going to look at what we have learnt about over the last 4 weeks, and have a go at
practising some of the skills. Later, we will also celebrate everything that we have done and
learnt about.”

Activity 1: Role Plays

Ask children to practice being assertive, dealing with bullying, feeling safe, feeling proud,
and problem solving, the skills learnt over the last 5 weeks. Provide pupils with the
following options if they find it hard to think of situations for themselves:
 Assertive:
 Problem solving:
 Managing Anger:
 Feeling proud:

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Activity 3: Feel Good Shield
“We have learnt that we all have things that we are good at. These things could be different
from other people, or the same. Sometimes, we might not know the things we are good at,
and find it hard to think of things that make us feel good about ourselves. So, what we are
going to do now is take a few minutes to think of some of the things we feel we are good at.
Other people may have told us that we are good at them, or they may be things we find
easy or enjoy. I would like you to all draw some special pictures that shows the things you
are good at, to help remind ourselves that we all have things we can do well. This is going to
be called a ‘Feeling Good Shield’.”

Activity 2: Quiz
Provide pupils with a multi-choice quiz to determine what pupils have learnt from the
programme.

Activity 3: Questionnaires
Provide all pupils with a copy of the pupil questionnaire for completion. Provide the school
partner with a separate questionnaire, and ask them to complete it before the end of the
session if possible.

Goodbyes:
“It’s time for us to finish now. Well done for completing the programme. I hope you have
enjoyed it, and that you have learnt lots of important things. I have enjoyed working with
you. I hope the things that you have learnt help you in school.”

Certificates:
Hand out the final certificates to pupils.

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 References

DCSF (2005) Primary SEAL Resources.

Mortimer, H. (2007) Worry Box: Managing Anxiety in Young Children, Stafford: QEd
Publications.

Scarpaci, R. (2006) Bullying: Effective Strategies for Its Prevention, Indianapolis: Kappa Delta
Pi.

Stallard, P. (2002) Think Good- Feel Good, John Wiley and Sons.

Wilding, C. and Milne, A. (2008) Teach Yourself Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, Oxford:
Bookpoint Ltd.

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