The Simpsons Operation: Enduring Free-doh!

by Jesse McLean

Jesse McLean 330 Cedarvale Ave. C. (647) 772-8552

OPERATION ENDURING FREE-DOH!

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OPERATION: ENDURING FREE-DOH! by Jesse McLean ACT ONE FADE IN: INT. SIMPSON CAR - DAY SCENE 1

Homer and Marge are in the front of the car. Marge drives and Homer is the passenger. Homer wears a t-shirt from the movie TWILIGHT and a cap that claims VAMPIRES SUCK!. He bounces with excitement. Marge looks worried. HOMER Oh, Marge, I cant wait to get the new Twilight book. Edward and Bella start a coven on the moon...on the moon! MARGE Uh huh...about that, Homer -- there isnt a new Twilight book. That was a white lie. (Homer gasps.) Were going to the Springfield - Shelbyville Cultural Exchange. Awwww! HOMER Culture...

MARGE Homey, we need to spend some quality time together. Plus you promised. HOMER I didnt know it was a follow-through promise. And why does time together mean something cultural? MARGE I tried smaller steps. Remember when I switched from regular vanilla ice cream to french vanilla? You didnt come off the roof for three days. HOMER Just another emotional outburst that turned everything back to normal. Homer produces a tub of ice cream and eats the last few scoops.
(CONTINUED) by Jesse McLean

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It is clearly a fancy french vanilla type with a homemade label on the front: REGULAR VANILLA: JUST LIKE LUMBERJACKS EAT. Empty, he tosses the tub out the window. HOMER (CONTD) One thing: if this is a coupley thing, why are the kill-joys here? Bart, Lisa and Maggie pop up from the back seat. MARGE I couldnt find a sitter. LISA (angry) I thought you said you were happy to bring us along. BART (angry) I thought you said there was a new Faces of Death for sale. Maggie sucks her pacifier. from the back seat. Angrily. Grampa also pops up

GRAMPA (angry) The bank called. Someones been trying to cash my social security checks again. What? HOMER Thats ridiculous!

Homer pulls a pair of novelty store Groucho Marx moustacheand-glasses from his shirt pocket and tosses them out the window. BART (to Homer) I thought you were going to use those to buy your girly book. LISA Dont listen to Bart, Dad. I think its great that youre reading. I guess literature is good for something other than kindling. HOMER They are many things Lisa, but Ms. Meyers books are not literature. SCENE 2 EXT. SHELBYVILLE CENTRAL SQUARE - DAY

There is a large gathering in the center of Shelbyville. (CONTINUED) by Jesse McLean

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The Simpsons drive through the entrance to the square, which is festooned with a large banner: SPRINGFIELD-SHELBYVILLE CULTURAL EXCHANGE - BURYING THE HATCHET (NO HATCHETS ALLOWED IN PARK). On foot by the entrance, Moe Syzlak reads the banner. He slings a heavy duffle bag off his shoulder and walks to a large pit currently filled with hatchets. Lower lip quivering, Moe drops his bag into the pit. Workers start to cover the pit with dirt. Moe turns away. MOE I cant watch. EXT. SHELBYVILLE CENTRAL SQUARE - DAY - MOMENTS LATER

Homer, Marge, Maggie, Lisa and Bart walk through the center of town, which is alive with a county fair atmosphere. HOMER I know all about these Shelbyville characters. They have strange powers. LISA Come on, Dad. This exchange is supposed to combat baseless xenophobia. A kindly older woman appears carrying a tray. KINDLY WOMAN Would anyone like some apple crumble? Homer grabs the entire platter with one hand and shields his face with the other. HOMER (to Bart) Dont look in her eyes boy or youll turn to stone! The boys run off. EXT. SHELBYVILLE CENTRAL SQUARE - DAY - MOMENTS LATER Homer and Bart stand by a stage for the official launching ceremony. They polish off the apple crumble as Lisa, Marge and Maggie rejoin them. On the stage is Mayor Quimby and another man, dashing in a retro sort of way. BART Whos the slickster next to Quimby?
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LISA Thats Shelbyville Mayor Ernest Gavros. Ive read about his Popsicle Stick Exchange Program. Lisa pulls out a copy of Mother Jones Kids. The cover is a constructivist-style illustration of a child in a schoolyard carrying a placard, beneath the cover story title: Is Dissent Dead in American Playgrounds? Other stories include, Gavros Popsicle Program: A Haven for Sweet Treat Abusers? and Haley Joel Osment: Im Not Dead. MARGE (sighs) He wears a blazer over a turtleneck and loafers with no socks... hes so dashing. LISA Like Gerry Brown meets Aristotle Onassis. HOMER (laughs) Honey, James Brown was black. And that Ari was a brute to Jackie. (he turns dark) But I fixed his wagon, didnt I?

by Jesse McLean