ou might think that positive psychology is all about positive emotions.

You’d be forgiven for thinking that, given positive psychology’s inherent positive
bent!

But the field isn’t all about positive emotions. Negative emotions are an inevitable
part of life and something that we need to experience in order to have a full, rich life.

Why do we need negative emotions to complement the positive ones?

Before you read on, we thought you might like to download our three Emotional
Intelligence Exercises for free. These science-based exercises will not only enhance
your ability to understand and regulate your emotions but will also give you the tools
to foster the emotional intelligence of your clients, students or employees.

This Article Contains:

 A Look at the Psychology
 Do We Need Both?
 Positive vs. Negative Emotions: A Look at the Differences
 How Can We Best Track Our Emotions?
 A Brief Look at Neutral Emotions
 4 PowerPoints on Positive and Negative Emotions
 A Take-Home Message
 References

A Look at the Psychology

People have been studying emotions for thousands of years. Given the heavy focus on
feelings, it’s not surprising that we know quite a bit about them; what is surprising is
the lack of understanding around the necessity of both emotions for healthy
functioning.

Let’s start by defining our terms.

What Are Positive Emotions?

Positive emotions are emotions that we typically find pleasurable to experience. The
Oxford Handbook of Positive Psychology defines them as “pleasant or desirable
situational responses… distinct from pleasurable sensation and undifferentiated
positive affect” (Cohn & Fredrickson, 2009).
Basically, this definition is stating that positive emotions are pleasant responses to our
environment (or our own internal dialogue) that are more complex and targeted than
simple sensations.

What Are Negative Emotions?

On the other hand, negative emotions are those that we typically do not find
pleasurable to experience. Negative emotions can be defined as “as an unpleasant or
unhappy emotion which is evoked in individuals to express a negative effect towards
an event or person” (Pam, 2013).

If an emotion discourages and drags you down, then it’s most likely a negative
emotion.

17 Examples: A List of Positive and Negative Emotions

Examples of positive and negative emotions will vary based on who you ask; even the
definition of an emotion can vary based on who answers the question. However you
define emotion, discerning between the two is an intuitive process—we seem to “just
know” which emotions are positive and which are negative.

Some common positive emotions include:

 Love
 Joy
 Satisfaction
 Contentment
 Interest
 Amusement
 Happiness
 Serenity
 Awe

A few of the most commonly felt negative emotions are:

 Fear
 Anger
 Disgust
 Sadness
 Rage
 Loneliness
 Melancholy
  Annoyance

LEARNING FROM OUR EMOTIONS

When we experience negative emotions, we generally are not engaging in actions that align with
our values, and our experience is not meeting our needs.

When this happens, we must take a step back, pause, and find ways to attend to this depleted
need.

Contrastingly, when we experience positive emotions, it signals that we engage in actions or

activities that align with our values. They also suggest that the experience is meeting our needs.

Therefore, we ought to approach them more readily and do them more often in these situations.
Imagine an activity that makes you feel joy. Naturally, you would want to move towards that
activity and do more of it, helping you further satisfy your needs.
Do We Need Both?
Look back over the list of sample negative emotions. Do you want to feel any of those
emotions? You probably don’t, and it’s no wonder! It doesn’t feel good to experience
any of those emotions.

Now, refer to the list of sample positive emotions. Have you ever felt one of these
emotions and thought to yourself, “I wish I wasn’t experiencing this emotion?”
Although you may have experienced this once or twice—generally at a time when we
think we shouldn’t feel positive emotions—it’s easy to see that this list is full of
pleasurable emotions that people tend to seek out.

We know that we need positive emotions to function effectively, grow, and thrive.

So if it’s basically universally unpleasant for us to experience negative emotions and

universally pleasant and desirable to experience positive emotions, do we actually
need the negative ones at all?

As it turns out, yes!

Are Negative Emotions Necessary?

Although they are not pleasant to experience, negative emotions really are necessary
for a healthy life. This is true for two big reasons:

 Negative emotions give us a counterpoint to positive emotions; without the

negative, would the positive emotions still feel as good?
 Negative emotions serve evolutionary purposes, encouraging us to act in ways
that boost our chances of survival and help us grow and develop as people.

As Tracy Kennedy from Lifehack.org points out, there is a good reason for each of the
basic emotions, both positive and negative:

 Anger: to fight against problems

 Fear: to protect us from danger
 Anticipation: to look forward and plan
 Surprise: to focus on new situations
 Joy: to remind us what’s important
 Sadness: to connect us with those we love
 Trust: to connect with people who help
 Disgust: to reject what is unhealthy (2018)

Without fear, would you be here today? Or would you have engaged in some risky
practices, putting yourself in unnecessary danger? Without disgust, would you have
been able to refrain from putting any of the many, many harmful substances that you
had access to as a toddler?

As unpleasant as they may be, it can’t be denied that negative emotions serve
important purposes in our lives.

Is it True that an Individual Will Only Feel Stress in Negative Situations?

Although you may think of stress as a solidly negative emotion or response to a

situation, it’s actually quite common for people to experience stress in neutral and
positive situations as well.

In fact, many experiences commonly thought of as positive can contribute huge

amounts of stress to our lives.

Here are just a few examples of positive experiences that can bring us stress:

 Planning for an upcoming wedding

 Preparing to move to somewhere you are excited to live
 The holidays—especially with family!
 Having a baby
 Starting an exciting new job

It’s perfectly natural to feel stress in all of these situations, even though you would
probably classify them as happy and positive. It’s yet another example of the interplay
between positive and negative that gives our lives balance.

How do you explore one's positive and negative emotions and feelings?
How do you express your negative emotions in a positive way?
How would you describe positive and negative in the context of emotions?
How do you explore your emotions?
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%27s+positive+and+negative+emotions+and+how+one+expresses+or+hides+them+activity&gs_lcp=Cgx
nd3Mtd2l6LXNlcnAQA0oECEEYAFAAWABgAGgAcAF4AIABAIgBAJIBAJgBAKABAQ&sclient=gws-wiz-serp
  Activities to Help Your Child Develop
a Positive Attitude
 By Ashley Cullins
 

 17 May
As a parent, it’s never easy to hear your child express negative thoughts or to
see her wallow in feelings like self-doubt, sadness, or anger.  

Unfortunately, science says it’s natural for people to dwell more on negative

thoughts than on positive ones, and this can be even more true for children.
This negativity is usually driven by fear, doubt, or shame, which
produces stress chemicals in the brain. Ultimately, a negative attitude can
shape how a child sees herself and the world around her.

But as parents, there’s plenty we can do to help our children develop a more
positive attitude about themselves and their world.

Before you continue, we thought you might like to download our FREE Your
Words Matter Kit. With these 10 popular parenting guides, you will know
exactly how to speak to your children to help them develop confidence,
internal motivation, and a can-do attitude.
Are Negative Thoughts Bad?
There are no “bad” emotions. All thoughts and feelings are valid. Both positive
and negative thoughts and emotions play a valuable role in how we process
the world around us.
For instance, sadness can help us process difficult times, and we would have
no moral compass if we never felt shame or guilt.

Danish psychologist Svend Brinkmann explains that the pressure to think

positively and be constantly cheerful has turned happiness into “a duty and a
burden.”

Additionally, trying to be happy all the time alienates us from our emotions,
which simply isn’t healthy. In fact, recent psychological research indicates
that emotional avoidance is one of the main causes of many psychological
issues.
For these reasons, there's no need to pressure children to avoid or
dismiss negative emotions.
What Can You Do Instead?
Instead, we can teach our kids to accept negative emotions and process them
in a healthy way. We can encourage positive thinking and positive
affirmations.
According to positive psychology researcher Barbara Fredrickson, positive
thinking is important because it broadens your sense of possibility and opens
your mind, allowing you to build new skills. Positive thinking, Fredrickson
says, “broadens and builds.” It also makes children (and adults) more resilient.
Neurobiologist Richard Davidson of the University of Wisconsin explains that
the brain is “plastic” and can be trained to be more emotionally resilient and to
respond to certain emotions in a healthier manner.
This can be accomplished by engaging in mental exercises that help “rewire”
the brain.
1. Loving-Kindness Meditation
Dr. Barbara Fredrickson found that just six weeks of training in a form of
meditation focused on kindness and compassion resulted in increased
positive emotions, social connectedness, and even improved health for
participants in her study.
In a similar study, Dr. Richard Davidson found that as little as two weeks’
training in compassion and kindness meditation led to changes in brain
circuitry linked to an increase in positive social behaviors, such as generosity.

Even three months after these experiments concluded, participants continued

to display increased mindfulness, purpose in life, social support, and
decreased illness symptoms.

Loving-kindness meditation involves thinking of loved ones and sending

them positive thoughts. Later, your child can expand her positive thoughts to
more neutral people in her life as well. Dr. Fredrickson describes this form of
meditation as “directing good-hearted wishes to others.”
The four traditional phrases are, “May you feel safe. May you feel happy.
May you feel healthy. May you live with ease.” But the actual wording you
and your child use aren’t important; it’s about generating feelings of kindness
and warmth. 
By practicing generating these feelings, the brain is conditioned to think more
positively. It also shows your child how easy it is to engage in feelings of
compassion and kindness, which can help her connect more easily with
others and increase her overall well-being.
2. Helping Others
Helping others is obviously beneficial to other people, but it will also enhance
your child’s own positive feelings and attitude.
People who volunteer have been found to have higher self-esteem and
overall well-being than those who don’t. 
Dr. Sonja Lyubomirsky, a professor at the University of California, Riverside,
says, “People who engage in kind acts become happier over time.” When your
child helps others, she will feel good about herself as a person, which will
ultimately help her feel more optimistic and positive in general.

Helping others is also linked to fostering a sense of belonging, inner peace,

and gratitude. Your child could help others by assisting an elderly neighbor
with yard work or chores, helping a friend with homework, or participating in a
canned food or clothing drive. You could also make volunteering a family affair
and regularly help out with a soup kitchen or other charitable organization.
A very young child can assist you around the house, help a younger sibling
with picking up toys or getting dressed, or even accompany you (and be your
“assistant”) when you help others. 

The more your child helps others, the more positive she’ll become.

3. Recording Daily Awe Moments

Dr. Fredrickson explains that positive thinking can stem from recognizing and
appreciating small moments of happiness and beauty. These simple moments
can include laughter, a hug, a beautiful sunset, or the sound of birds singing.

"We sometimes have special moments in life. {...} These moments are so

exhilarating that we get goosebumps on our arms, feel tingling up and down
our spine, tears flood our eyes, and our jaw drops.
This is called awe."
Sandi Schwartz at Parent.co
One practical way to work on this skill with your child is to have her start
an Awe Journal. You can keep one of your own as well, and you and your
child can discuss them weekly or daily.
In the Awe Journal, you and your child will record sights or moments from
your daily lives that you find beautiful or extraordinary: a rainbow, a kind act,
or even the smell of freshly baked cookies. Your child can record these
moments with drawings, descriptions, poems, etc.

It may seem small, but writing about positive experiences can actually have a
major impact on positive thinking. A study published in the Journal of
Research in Personality examined 90 undergraduate students who were split
into two groups.
One group wrote about an intensely positive experience every day for only
three days. The other group wrote about a control topic. Three months later,
the first group was still experiencing better mood levels and fewer illnesses. 
Working on the Awe Journal will also teach your child to begin recognizing
and searching for beauty everywhere, which will help her form a more positive
view of the world and herself.
4. Setting and Achieving Goals
Dr. Fredrickson and her colleagues also suggest that goal-setting helps
people become more optimistic, positive thinkers with a greater sense of well-
being.
Dr. Gabriele Oettingen, a Professor of Psychology at New York University and
the University of Hamburg, explains that positive thinking alone doesn’t help
people reach their goals. Sometimes, she says, “Dreamers are no doers.”
At times, people who are too optimistic about reaching their goals don’t take
the possible setbacks they may encounter seriously, and they ultimately fail at
achieving these goals, which may negatively impact their outlook.
To help your child achieve goals and develop more long-term positive
thinking, try using Dr. Oettiengen’s WOOP strategy:
Wish - Help your child come up with a goal she would really like to
accomplish.
Outcome - Engage your child in visualizing the best outcome that could result
from accomplishing this goal. What would this outcome look like? What would
it feel like?
Obstacle - Take wishing and visualizing a practical step further by generating
a list of obstacles that could prevent your child from reaching the goal. These
obstacles could include wanting to give up or getting distracted by something,
like wanting to play with toys or check a cell phone.
Plan - Finally, make a plan for dealing with these obstacles if/when they
occur. Have your child say or write sentences like If/when [Obstacle] , then I
will [Plan to overcome the obstacle] .
Visualizing and planning for obstacles in advance makes it more likely that
your child will actually achieve her goals, resulting in increased confidence
and a more positive attitude.
If you're looking for helpful growth mindset activities, check out The
Bestseller’s Bundle. It includes our three most popular printable kits packed
with science-based activities, guides, and crafts for children.
5. Sharing Positivity 
One of the most powerful ways to teach your child to have a positive attitude
is to MODEL this behavior for her. When you accept and process your
emotions in a healthy way, you teach your child to do the same.
You can also share positive experiences with your child. Dr. Frederickson
observes that “shared positivity—having two people caught up in the same
emotion—may have an even greater impact on health than something positive
experienced by oneself.”
She suggests such simple activities as watching a funny TV show or movie
and laughing together, sharing a funny joke or good news, or being physically
affectionate. Anything that sparks feelings of joy, contentment, and love
contributes to positive thinking, especially when these emotions are shared.

 Laugh with your child, hug your child, set aside time to provide your undivided
attention, and enjoy positive experiences together. Taking time to discuss the
Awe Journals mentioned above can be a valuable shared experience as well.

These moments of togetherness will deepen your bond with your child, and it
will increase her positivity and health, both physical and emotional.

Don't forget to download our FREE Your Words Matter Kit with 10 helpful

parenting guides and tips to use when speaking to your children.
6. Developing Skills and Trying New
Activities
Recognize your child’s strengths and give her opportunities to develop them
and experience success. For example, if your child has a beautiful singing
voice, let her try voice lessons and perform in voice recitals. If she’s an
excellent soccer player, sign her up for a local team.
As your child develops skills and succeeds as a result, she’ll increase her
confidence and develop a more positive outlook and attitude.
Similarly, trying new things can result in increased confidence and
resilience. Encourage your child to try a new sport, instrument, game, or
activity.
Likewise, if your child expresses interest in a new activity, let her try it out. As
she enjoys or finds a degree of success with this new activity, she’ll develop a
more positive view of herself, her abilities, and life in general.

You can even find new activities to try with your child in order to increase your
shared positive experiences. Sign up for a cooking class, work on a few art
projects, or take up rollerblading together.

7. Practicing Positive Affirmations

Positive affirmations are belief systems rooted in the universal truth. They
are positive statements that children or adults can repeat to themselves in
order to increase self-esteem, promote positive thinking, and change negative
self-talk.
Affirmations are most effective if you let your child come up with her own. This
is because the healing power of affirmation comes not from saying the
positive words aloud, but from internalizing them. Your child will also
take ownership of the process and be more committed to her affirmations.
Guide your child to come up with affirmations that are short, positive, and
present tense. Examples include:

 I am kind.
 I am enough.
 I am loving.
 I am a good friend.
 I am unique.
Instead of giving your child instructions or requiring her to say affirmations, try
to use them in a playful manner. Research shows that children learn best
through play, so turn your child’s affirmations into a game the two of you play
together. Take turns affirming one another and then saying your own
affirmations, or come up with a song or dance.
You can also post your child’s affirmations on her mirror or around her
room, or the two of you can make a creative art project using these
statements. 
The more your child says her affirmations, the more she’ll come to truly
believe them, ultimately reducing negative self-talk and increasing positive
thinking.
Every child experiences negative self-talk. But you can prevent it from turning
into automatic, hard-wired thinking.

Looking for additional resources to support building grit and resilience

in your child? The Build Your Frustration Tolerance Masterclass is a self-
paced growth mindset parenting masterclass where you'll learn how to help
your child push ahead and persevere instead of quitting or giving up at the
slightest setback. You'll get lifetime access so you can go through all the
materials at your own pace. Our expert parenting educators will give you
specific tools and strategies to raise a child who has the CONFIDENCE AND
DETERMINATION to overcome their frustration and persevere.
n this Infographic, we have illustrated 7 tips to help your children develop a
positive attitude.

 EMOTIONS AND FEELINGS

 MANAGING NEGATIVE FEELINGS

How to Hide What You Feel

Download Article

METHODS

1Understanding Your Feelings

2Hiding Feelings From Someone You Have Feelings For

3Hiding Feelings From Others

+Show 1 more...

OTHER SECTIONS

Video

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References

Article Summary

Co-authored by Nicole Moshfegh, PsyD

Last Updated: October 25, 2022
When it comes to your emotions, most experts say acknowledging and expressing them is
healthy and necessary.[1][2] However, there are also times when keeping your feelings under
wraps is best. It might be that you have romantic feelings for someone, but don't want to risk
ruining your friendship. Or it could be that you have feelings for someone who is married or
otherwise taken. Maybe your feelings don't involve romance at all, but jealousy, anger, or
sadness and you feel it is wise to conceal these feelings for whatever reason. While it is not
healthy as a long-term strategy or in situations with those you are closest to, there are several
strategies that can help you hide your feelings in situations where that is best for you and for
others.
Things You Should Know
 Reflect on why you're hiding your feelings, who you're hiding them from, and whether or not
your feelings could signal a deeper problem, like mental illness.

 To hide your feelings from a love interest or people generally, focus on acting and speaking
casually, avoiding others, or lying about your feelings.

 Express your emotions or channel them into healthy activities—but don't use drugs and alcohol to
cope.
Method 1
Understanding Your Feelings
Download Article

1.

1
Determine who you are trying to hide your feelings from. Are you hiding them from just one
friend? Other friends? Both? Everyone? This is going to determine how you proceed and to what
degree you must hide your feelings.

 Hiding your feelings from everyone works only if the feelings are temporary
and not likely to affect other aspects of your life. For instance, if you are angry
at your parents for grounding you, but you know that you will get over it soon,
you can choose to ignore and hide those feelings from everyone. But if you are
angry at your parents for abusing you, this is not something you are likely to
 overcome without telling someone in authority, discussing it with friends, and
eventually confronting your parents about it (when you are older, assuming you
want to maintain a relationship with them).
 It is often helpful if you have a trusted friend you can confide in. This person
may be able to help you sort through your complex emotions and understand
your options. Someone who has no connection to the person you have feelings
for is ideal.
2.

2
Understand that some feelings should not be contained. Sometimes, the healthiest choice for
you is to express your feelings and deal with the fallout. Often, containing the way you feel
causes those feelings to grow instead of recede, and eventually you have to let them out.

 Tell your friend if you have romantic feelings for them, if those feelings are
making it difficult for you to be a good and supportive friend. Your friend has
the right to know and if you have a strong enough friendship, you can work
through the way you are feeling together.
 Most often, feelings of hurt or betrayal at the hands of someone you love should
be dealt with. If someone has caused you pain, you deserve to let them know
and give them the chance to make it right. If they care about you, they would
want to know that you are hurting. If they don't care about you, then you
deserve to know that, too, so that you can move on with your life.
3.

3
Know when your feelings are a warning sign of something deeper. Containing or hiding your
feelings is not the best answer if your feelings are an indication that you need to seek help. In
those rare cases, it's important to recognize that your feelings are a symptom of something else.
  If this is an issue that’s chronically coming up in many areas of your life, then it
might be a time for you to really evaluate whether you could use some extra
support by seeking out therapy.[3]
 If you have an urge to hurt yourself or others, seek help immediately. Self-harm
and/or violent tendencies can signal underlying disorders and you don't have to
live like that! If you're in the United States, call 911 or the 988 Suicide and
Crisis Lifeline (which can be reached by calling or texting 988), or search
online for your country's resources.
 If your feelings are inappropriate or illegal-- for example, sexual feelings for
minors or an overwhelming urge to use illegal drugs-- please seek help from a
licensed counselor or psychologist. There are treatment plans available for you.
If you don't have a mental health care provider, your general practitioner can
give you a recommendation.
 If you have ongoing feelings of despair, sadness, or like life does not have the
same meaning it used to have, you may be experiencing depression. Seek help
from a licensed mental health care provider, who can help you with a
personalized treatment plan. Ask your general practitioner for a
recommendation.
Method 2
Hiding Feelings From Someone You Have Feelings For
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1.

1
Avoid one-on-one time. It's easy to become lost in your own little world with someone that you
have feelings for, but if you're trying to hide your feelings, it's best if you avoid spending time
alone together where situations are more likely to make it hard to hide how you feel.

 Spending time alone will only cause your feelings to grow and create more
opportunities for you to accidentally give yourself away-- a hug that lingers too
long, a brush of the hands that leads to hand-holding, or a gaze into his or her
 eyes that says more than you meant to say. Keeping other friends nearby can
give you a way to avoid those tempting scenarios and also keep your affection
from growing.
 If you typically spend time alone with this person, avoid setting off any alarm
bells in their mind by gradually shifting to more group-oriented get togethers.
For example, if you usually grab drinks after work together, arrange beforehand
for another mutual friend to meet up with the you at a particular location. That
way, when the object of your feelings asks if you want to grab a drink, you can
say that you already have plans but he or she is welcome to join.
2.

2
Act normal. Don't try to impress them or show off too much for them. It shows that you're
looking for attention and most people will figure out why.

 Similarly, don't go out of your way to run errands or do favors for your friend. It
might be easy to go overboard with helpful favors since you really like this
person and care for his or her well-being, but it will be obvious that your
feelings are not what they were before if you start acting in new ways.
3.

3
See them in a new light. Try to notice their flaws or things about them that you don't find
attractive or sexy. We often tend to elevate people we like to a superhuman status and forget that
they have flaws and failures just like everyone else.

 Try to think of them as a sibling. If a relationship with this person is just not
possible (for instance, you're gay and they are not, or they are married), the best
 thing you can do is re-frame how you view the person so that he or she is off-
limits to you, too, instead of just the other way around.
4.

4
Avoid them if you must. If the feelings have gotten too strong and you feel you can't hide them
any longer, you may have to reduce the amount of time you spend with them or cut out your
relationship altogether.

 For example, if your friend is married or in a serious relationship, and you

cannot stop thinking about them romantically and you are afraid you are going
to try to act on your feelings, it might be better for both of you to lose a
friendship than for your friend to lose their marriage.
Method 3
Hiding Feelings From Others
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1.

1
Watch what you say. Be quick on your feet to respond, especially if you are nervous as your
other friends will tell everyone if you admit your feelings.

 Be ready to change the subject or divert the focus from you if the sensitive topic
arises. When questioned about your feelings you have to have a determined-
sounding response and fire back your response without too much (or too little)
delay.
 One of the biggest tell-tale signs of someone who is hiding their feelings is that
they become uncharacteristically quiet or standoffish. If you want to hide your
 feelings, you have to hide the fact that you're hiding them as well! So be sure to
try not to come across as overly quiet.[4]
2.

2
Lie if you must. If they ask you directly, and you still don't want to admit, you're going to have
to consciousness look them in the eye and lie. Make your response simple and to the point.

 Many people believe that making eye contact is a sign that the speaker is telling
the truth so this along with your brief responses will help to keep your feelings
secret.
3.

3
Avoid them. If you are overcome with anger or sadness and those feelings intensify in the
presence of others, you may have to take some time out and avoid the people who stir those
feelings in you.

 In many cases, time will help alleviate some of your emotions, and you will be
able to resume your relationship once things have cooled down.
 In some cases, such as instances of extreme betrayal or abuse, it might be better
to eliminate that relationship altogether.
Method 4
Dealing with Feelings in Healthy Ways
Download Article

1.
1
Avoid coping mechanisms. If you decide to conceal your feelings, you might be tempted to turn
to common but unhealthy coping mechanisms, but doing so just makes the problem worse.

 Avoid drugs or alcohol. Many people who are sad or experiencing unrequited
love turn to alcohol or drugs to cope with the pain, but doing so tends to make
the sadness even worse when soberness returns, and can lead to problems with
addiction and health consequences.
 Watch out for the sugar trap. Many people cope with sadness or feelings of
rejection by eating, particularly carb- and sugar-heavy foods like ice cream and
chocolate. But the body responds to sugar and carbs by creating a fake
emotional "high" that quickly plummets into a sugar crash that is even worse
than the way you felt before you ate the sugar. Don’t fall into that trap! [5]
 Don't turn to empty relationships and sex. Especially if your feelings are related
to unexpressed love or feelings of rejection from a romantic partner, you might
be tempted to turn to casual sex and empty relationships to fill that void. But
these relationships will not fill your craving for affection and intimacy. Give
yourself time to grieve your lost love and then give it time. You will find
someone to fill the emotional needs you have as well as the physical ones.
2.

2
Choose healthy outlets for your emotions. Instead of unhealthy coping mechanisms, look for
healthy ways to express your feelings.

 Practice mindfulness and staying present.[6]

 Try exercise. Focusing your anger or disappointment on physical fitness can be
a great way to distract yourself. Consider high intensity exercise like boxing,
weightlifting, or circuit training. Just be sure you don't take it too far and
exercise without resting or without taking proper precautions to protect your
body from injuries.
  Learn a new art form. Expressing yourself through creativity can help to get
some of your emotions out in safe, healthy ways. Try painting, writing music,
writing short stories or poetry, or a craft like sewing or woodworking. Even if
the art is unrelated to your particular feelings that you're hiding, it can be a way
to take your mind off of things and focus your energy on something productive.
3.

3
Express your emotions in appropriate ways. You may have been fearful to express
your emotions for fear that the confrontation would get out of control. It's important to
develop and practice healthy ways of expressing yourself so that you can be in control of
your interactions with others.
 Set aside 15-20 minutes a day to journal in order to process your
emotions. Ask yourself, "How has my day been so far? What has been
coming up for me?"[7]
 Feelings of anger should not automatically result in shouting fests. In
fact, yelling when you're angry often makes it hard to communicate what
it is that has you upset, and also makes it more likely that the person
you're yelling at will tune you out and not listen. Instead, let anger lead
you to be more assertive and brave in your confrontations without letting
it get the better of you. Use your anger to guide you toward rational
conversations that can help solve the problem rather than creating new
ones.[8]
 Express your sadness without fearing that you shouldn't. Some people
have been raised to think that it's childish or inappropriate to cry or
mourn a loss, especially for men, but actually letting yourself feel
sadness when sad things happen is an important sign of maturity. It's ok
to feel sad and let yourself experience that feeling by crying.[9]
 Expressing your feelings can help you avoid negative health
consequences of holding them in, such as hypertension, depression, and
weight gain.[10]
  Check out this helpful wikiHow article for more advice about healthy
ways to express your emotions.
Expert Q&A
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Warnings
 Avoid the temptation to express your hidden feelings on social media such as Facebook or
Twitter. Those posts will inevitably be seen by or forwarded to the person you are hiding your
feelings from!

You Might Also LikeWhat are Negative Emotions?

It’s important to distinguish between what an emotion is and what a feeling is. While
the two are interconnected, there’s a bigger difference than you may realize. It’s
definitely something that surprised me when I began with my research.

Emotions – Emotions are regarded as ‘lower level’ responses. They first occur in the
subcortical areas of the brain such as the amygdala and the ventromedial prefrontal
cortices. These areas are responsible for producing biochemical reactions that have a
direct impact on your physical state.

Emotions are coded into our DNA and are thought to have developed as a way to help
us respond quickly to different environmental threats, much like our ‘fight or flight’
response. The amygdala has also been shown to play a role in the release of
neurotransmitters that are essential for memory, which is why emotional memories are
often stronger and easier to recall.

Emotions have a stronger physical grounding than feelings meaning researchers find
them easier to measure objectively through physical cues such as blood flow, heart
rate, brain activity, facial expressions, and body language.

Feelings – Emotions are seen as preceding feelings, which tend to be our reactions to
the different emotions we experience. Where emotions can have a more generalized
experience across all humans, feelings are more subjective and are influenced by our
personal experiences and interpretations of our world based on those experiences.
Feelings occur in the neocortical regions of the brain and are the next step in how we
respond to our emotions as an individual. Because they are so subjective, they can’t be
measured the way emotions can.

Psychologists have long explored the range of human emotions and their definitions.
Eckman (1999) identified six initial basic emotions:

 Anger
 Disgust
 Fear
 Happiness
 Sadness
 Surprise

He later expanded on this to include a further eleven basic emotions:

 Amusement
 Contempt
 Contentment
 Embarrassment
 Excitement
 Guilt
 Pride
 Relief
 Satisfaction
 Sensory Pleasure
 Shame

Pam (2013) defines negative emotions “as an unpleasant or unhappy emotion which
is evoked in individuals to express a negative effect towards an event or person.”
Reading through the list of Eckman’s basic emotions, it’s quite easy to determine
those that might be referred to as ‘negative’ emotions.

While we can use the label negative, with what we know about emotions, it’s
important to acknowledge that all emotions are completely normal to experience.
They are a part of our ingrained DNA. What is more important, is understanding when
and why negative emotions might arise, and developing positive behaviors to address
them.

A Look at the Psychology of Emotions

One of the more popular psychological theories of emotions is Robert Plutchik’s
Wheel of Emotions. Plutchik (1980) stated that there are eight basic emotions: joy,
trust, fear, surprise, sadness, anticipation, anger and disgust. Plutchik went further by
pairing the emotions with their opposites and then creating the wheel of emotions,
which serves to elaborate on how complex and interactive our emotions are.

As mentioned, Plutchik paired the basic emotions with their polar opposites to help
further develop his theory, so:

 Sadness is the opposite of Joy

 Anticipation is the opposite of Surprise
  Anger is the opposite of Fear
 Disgust is the opposite of Trust

Plutchik’s wheel is a strong visual representation of how our emotions present

themselves. As you can see the core emotion decreases as you move outward on the
wheel. Plutchik also used color to represent the intensity of the emotion: the darker
the color, the more intense it is. So at its most intense trust becomes admiration, and at
its least intense, acceptance.

It’s a fantastic starting resource for helping us further develop our understanding of
how our emotions present themselves, how they fluctuate and how they can interact
with each other. It has informed further psychological research in this area and is
often the foundation from which researchers exploring emotions have based their
research (Eckman, 1999, Parrott, 2001, Lazarus & Lazarus, 1996).

Shaver et al (1987) and later Parrott (2001) proposed a ‘tree’ of emotions which broke
emotions into primary, secondary and tertiary dimensions. This includes 6 primary
emotions (love, joy, surprise, anger, sadness, and fear), with associated emotions that
develop at the secondary level, and again at the tertiary level.

For example, if the primary emotion is joy, the secondary emotions could include
cheerfulness, optimism or enthrallment and the tertiary level could include pleasure,
triumph or hope.

Cambria, Livingstone, and Hussain (2011) took Plutchik’s wheel to another level and
developed ‘The Hourglass of Emotions’. In their book, they built on Plutchik’s eight
basic emotions and broke them down into four dimensions: sensitivity, attention,
pleasantness, and aptitude.

They also made distinctions between which of the emotions were positive (joy, trust,
anger, and anticipation) or negative (disgust, sadness, fear, and surprise).

Research and Studies

The more research has tried to understand our emotions, the more that’s come to light
around the distinction between positive and negative emotions, and the impact of each
on not only our mental wellbeing but our physical wellbeing too.

Below I’ve collated a few summaries of the studies I found while researching this
topic that will hopefully give you a bit more insight into our current understanding of
negative emotions:
  Schwarz and Clore (1996) developed a theory of ‘feelings-as-information’
which conceptualized the role of our emotions in how we make judgments
about our environment. They theorized that our emotions provide us with
feedback on the safety of our environment and our capacity to handle given
situations. In this respect, negative emotions provide us with the strongest
indication that something is not right, or that our safety might be compromised.
 Anxiety is often seen as a negative emotion, but it’s a necessary one to spur us
to action. We often find it difficult to respond to situations without the presence
of this emotion but it’s important to keep it in check as prolonged anxiety can
impair our cognitive functioning (Rosen, 2008).
 Adler, Rosen, and Silverstein (1998) explored the impact of negative emotions
in the role of negotiation. Focusing on two negative emotions – fear and anger
– they found that negotiators who couldn’t control or understand these
emotions when they arose were often unable to mediate the situation
effectively, despite their training. Similar research has explored the ways
different emotions, such as anger and gratitude, impact cognition and behavior
within the context of mediation (Williams and Hinshaw, 2018).
 Biswas-Diener and Kashdan (2014) wrote an entire book on the positive
motivation that negative emotions can move us towards. They see negative
emotions as motivators to help us address and correct behavior and take action.
 Negative emotions have also been studied in cultural contexts. Rozin et al.
(1999) explored feelings of contempt, anger and disgust, and their impact
within American and Japanese communities on moral codes such as
community, autonomy, and divinity.
 Appraisal Theory has also taken a look at negative emotions – specifically
anger. Studies have found that people feel angry when they view an event or
situation as personally relevant to them, inconsistent with what they are trying
to achieve and when this is caused intentionally by another person. Appraisal
theorists emphasize the role of perception of potential threats (Lazarus, 1991,
Roseman, 1991, and Smith and Elsworth, 1985).

8 Examples of Negative Emotions

As we’ve begun to explore, negative emotions are completely normal. Without them,
we wouldn’t be able to appreciate positive ones. At the same time, if you find you
consistently have a tendency towards one particular emotion – especially a negative
one – it’s worth exploring why that might be.

I’ve summarized 8 of the more common negative emotions and why they might arise:

Anger
Ever have someone tell you no to do something you want? How does that make you
feel? Does your blood begin to boil, your temperature rise and do you metaphorically
‘see red’? This is commonly how anger is described. Your body is reacting to things
not going your way, and it’s an attempt to try and rectify that.

Often when we’re angry we’ll shout, our face will register our anger and we may even
throw things around. We’re trying to get our own way in a situation and this is the
only way we can think how. If you’re often reacting to scenarios in this way, it’s a
good idea to explore why and come up with more positive strategies.

Annoyance

Do you have a colleague who perhaps talks too loudly? Does your partner always
leave their dirty dishes in the sink? Though we may like our colleague and love our
partner these behaviors can make us feel really annoyed. Referring to Pluchik’s wheel,
you can see that annoyance is the weaker form of anger.

While not as intense as anger, it’s the result of a similar thought process – something
has happened or someone is doing something you wish they wouldn’t. And you have
no control over it.

Fear

Fear is often cited as one of the core basic emotions, and that’s because it’s heavily
linked with our sense of self-preservation. It’s an evolved response to warn us about
dangerous situations, unexpected obstacles or failures. We don’t feel fear in order to
feel distressed, on the contrary, it’s there to help us navigate potential danger
successfully.

Embracing the emotion of fear and exploring why it arises can help you prepare
yourself proactively to tackle challenges.

Anxiety

Much like fear, anxiety seeks to warn us about potential threats and dangers. It’s often
seen as a negative emotion as it’s thought having an anxious disposition impairs
judgment and our ability to act. New research has found the opposite.

Zein, Wyatt, and Grezes (2015) found having anxiety heightened participants ability
to recognize faces with angry or fearful expressions. They measured electrical signals
in the brain and found that non-clinically diagnosed participants shifted their energy
from sensory (expressing the emotion) to motor (physical action) circuits. Basically,
participants with anxiety were more ready to respond and react to perceived threats.

Sadness

When you miss a deadline, get a bad grade, or don’t secure that job you had your
hopes pinned on, you’ll probably feel sad. Sadness happens when we are dissatisfied
with ourselves, our achievements or the behavior of someone else around us. Sadness
can be good to experience as it indicates to us that we passionate about something. It
can be a great catalyst to pursue change.

Guilt

Guilt is a complex emotion. We can feel this in relation to ourselves and past
behaviors that we wish hadn’t happened, but also in relation to how our behavior
impacts those around us. Guilt is often referred to as a ‘moral emotion’ (Haidt, 2000)
and can be another strong catalyst to encourage us to make changes in our life.

Apathy

Like guilt, apathy can be a complex emotion. If you’ve lost enthusiasm, motivation or
interest in the things you’ve previously enjoyed, this could be related to apathy. Like
anger, it can arise when we lose control over a scenario or situation but instead of
becoming angry, we pursue a more passive-aggressive expression of rebellion.

Despair

Ever tried to achieve a certain task or goal multiple times and not succeeded? Did that
make you feel like throwing your hands in the air, and camping out in bed with a large
tub of ice cream for company? That’s despair and it’s an emotion that arises when we
aren’t getting the results we want. Despair gives us an excuse to give up on our
desired goals and it comes back to a self-preservation tactic.

Despair can actually be a useful reminder to take a break and restore, before
continuing to pursue a challenging goal.

What Causes Negative Emotions and Why Do We Have

Them?
Once you start exploring negative emotions a little bit more, you can really start to see
what might cause or trigger them, and why we have them in the first place.
In terms of causes, it could be a number of things for example:

 Anxiety felt around attending an interview for a new job

 Anger at being caught up in traffic
 Sadness at experiencing a break-up
 Annoyance that a colleague hasn’t done the work for a big project
 Despair at not being able to stick to a new workout regime

Emotions are a source of information (Schwarz and Clore, 1996) that help you
understand what is going on around you. Negative emotions, in particular, can help
you recognize threats (Zein, Wyatt and Grezes, 2015) and feel prepared to positively
handle potential dangers (Biswas-Diener and Kashdan, 2014).

Many different experiences in our lives will incite different emotional reactions, to
differing degrees of intensity. As a human being, you will experience a full range of
emotions throughout your lifetime in response to rapidly changing situations.

Do We Want to Overcome and Stop Negative Emotions

Altogether?
In a nutshell, no.

It’s normal for us to want to move away from emotions that make us feel bad. As an
evolutionary response, negative emotions in the modern world are not really an
indication of a severe threat against us, but overcoming and stopping them altogether
would be hugely detrimental to us.

Negative emotions are an incredibly normal, healthy and helpful part of life. I think
it’s really important not to fall into the ‘happiness trap’ of believing that these
emotions are a sign of weakness or low emotional intelligence. I know from personal
experience that trying to hide away from negative emotions, can lead to further
emotional pain.

As a human being, you will experience a full range of emotions throughout your
lifetime in response to rapidly changing situations. No emotion is without purpose.
It’s when we begin to further explore and understand the purpose behind each
emotion, that we learn new ways to respond which supports our emotional growth and
sense of wellbeing.

When exploring negative emotions, it’s also important to know that they are not the
only source of information you have access to. Before you act upon any emotion you
should also seek to explore your previous experiences, stored knowledge and
memories, personal values and desired outcomes for any given scenario (Shpancer,
2010).

Remember – emotions are a low-level reaction so you get to decide how you respond
to them and not let them hijack your behavior.

What are the Effects of Negative Emotions?

While understanding that negative emotions are a healthy part of life is important,
there is a downside to giving them too much free reign.

If you spend too much time dwelling on negative emotions and the situations that
might have caused them, you could go into a spiral of rumination. Rumination is the
tendency to keep thinking, replaying, or obsessing over negative emotional situations
and experiences (Nolen-Hoeksema, 1991).

In this spiral of negative thinking, you can end up feeling worse and worse about the
situation and yourself, the result of which could be a number of detrimental effects to
your mental and physical wellbeing.

The problem with rumination is that it increases your brain’s stress response circuit,
meaning your body gets unnecessarily flooded with the stress hormone cortisol.
There’s considerable evidence that this is a driver for clinical depression (Izard,
2009).

Further research has linked the tendency to ruminate to a number of harmful coping
behaviours, such as overeating, smoking and alcohol consumption, alongside physical
health consequences including insomnia, high blood pressure, cardiovascular disease,
and clinical anxiety and depression (Gerin et al, 2012, Dimsdale, 2008, Everson et al,
1998).

Another study found that people who indulged in prolonged rumination after a
negative emotional experience took longer to recover from the physiological impact
of the experience (Szabo et al, 2017).

Rumination can be a difficult loophole to get out of, especially as most people don’t
realize they’re stuck in ruminating rut and instead believe they are actively problem
solving (Yapko, 2015). This can lead to further implications for mental and physical
wellbeing.
How Can They Impact our Health and Wellbeing?
It’s not negative emotions that directly impact our health and wellbeing, but how we
react and process them when we do experience them that really counts.

Staying stuck on negative emotions can increase our bodies’ production of our stress
hormone, cortisol, which in turn depletes our cognitive ability to problem solve
proactively and can also damage our immune defenses, making us more susceptible to
other illness (Butler, Klaus, Edwards, & Pennington, 2017; Sapolsky, 1998). Chronic
stress has also been linked to a shorter lifespan (Epel et al, 2004).

Anger is the negative emotion that has been shown to have the biggest impact on our
health and wellbeing, particularly where this is poorly managed. Studies have
connected anger to various health concerns including high blood pressure,
cardiovascular disease and digestive disorders (Hendricks et al, 2013).

Boerma (2007) linked unhealthy amounts of anger to increased levels of cortisol,

which were implicated in decreased immune system efficiency. Boerma’s research
found that chronically angry people were more likely to have a cold, the flu, asthmatic
symptoms and skin diseases such as rashes compared to non-chronically angry people.

A newer area of research has explored the impact of negative emotions on our sensory
perceptions and experiences. Kelley and Schmeichel (2014) explored the impact of
fear and anger on our sense of touch. Participants were asked to recall, relive and
write up a personal experience that elicited a fear response or an angry response.

The researchers then administered a two-point discrimination procedure – basically,

the participant’s hand was hidden from their view and they were poked in their index
finger with either one point or two points.

Participants then had to decide whether they were poked by one or two instruments.
Higher inaccuracy suggests a diminished sense of touch. Participants who were asked
to recall a fear response consistently demonstrated a reduced sense of touch when
distinguishing between one or two points of contact.

The research into the impact of negative emotions on our sensory perceptions is still
emerging, but it could provide some great insights into why we might hold on to
negative emotions and how they affect our memory of negative situations.

Negative Emotions and Cancer

Some research has begun to look at the link between negative emotions and cancer.
Again, in this area, most of the research has focused specifically on anger as a
negative emotion and its link to cancer.

Anger as an emotion is normal to feel, but as we’ve already seen from the research,
it’s how it’s expressed – or not expressed – that can cause problems. When anger is
intense and prolonged, or on the flip side, repressed, it becomes what researchers refer
to as unhealthy anger (Enright & Fitzgibbons, 2015).

Unhealthy anger in its repressed state has been linked to cancer. Thomas at al (2000)
found that patients with cancer also presented extremely low anger scores when
tested, which they felt suggested that the patients were repressing or suppressing their
anger. The researchers suggested that this was evidence that repressed anger could be
a precursor to the development of cancer.

Other research seems to support their claim. In studies with women diagnosed with
breast cancer, researchers report a statistically significant relationship between what
they refer to as extreme repression of anger, and the diagnosis of breast cancer (Greer
and Morris, 1975).

Women who repressed their anger showed increased levels of serum Immunoglobulin
A, which has been linked to some autoimmune diseases (Pettingale, Greer and Tee,
1977).

Penedo et al (2006) focused on the impact of repressed anger in connection to prostate

cancer. They found a strong presence of the Natural Killer Cell Cytotoxicity in men
who reported that they didn’t repress their anger.

Although these studies do seem to suggest a link, especially with repressed anger,
there is still too little research in this area to be conclusive. It also doesn’t show a
strong link between anger and all cancers, only selective ones. It’s also worth noting
that these studies refer to extreme repressed anger which is quite rare in most people.

What these studies do provide is an insight into the long-term effects of negative
emotions like anger when they are not handled in proactive ways.

5 Proven Benefits of Negative Emotions

It’s not all doom and gloom. When handled well, negative emotions can have proven
benefits for our wellbeing, and far more research has been poured into exploring this
aspect of negative emotions.
I’ve summarised some of the key findings from the research for how negative
emotions can benefit you:

1. Sadness can help you pay more attention to detail

Where positive emotions signal that all is well in our immediate environment,
negative emotions alert us that there are challenges or new stimuli that requires our
more focused attention (Forgas, 2014). Sadness sends us the alert that something is
not right and asks us to turn our attention to why this may be, what might be causing
it, and what we need to do to fix it.

2. Anger can be a strong motivator to seek mediation

Anger is only followed by aggression in about ten percent of scenarios (Kassinove

and Tafrate, 2002). Anger has been proven to encourage you to seek out active
behaviors to address scenarios or people you’ve found problematic but doesn’t
necessarily mean through confrontation or physical acts.

Anger is a strong alert that encourages you to reflect on why someone might be
behaving a certain way, and what you can do to restore peace.

3. Anxiety encourages new ways of approaching problems and challenges

When we feel anxious, we’ll try and do anything we can not to feel that way anymore.
Anxiety is closely linked to our ‘fight or flight’ response, which allows your body to
create energy quickly, ready for action. When faced with dangerous situations, anxiety
will take over and encourage us to seek solutions quickly in order to escape danger
(Biswas-Diener and Kashdan, 2014).

4. Guilt helps you change negative behavior

Guilt can be an exceptionally useful emotion. It’s essentially our moral compass and
when it goes off, it’s a good indication that we may have behaved or said something
hurtful to someone we care about. It’s like our internal system for punishing ourselves
when we’ve done something wrong.

People who are more prone to feeling guilty are less likely to steal, do drugs, resort to
violence or drink and drive (Biswas-Diener and Kashdan, 2014).

5. Jealousy motivates you to work harder

Jealousy isn’t always malicious. Most of the time it’s what psychologists refer to as
‘benign envy’. Benign envy has been shown to encourage students to perform better
on tests and in schoolwork, as seeing another student achieve a good grade made it
more tangible for them to achieve too (van de Vien, Zeelenberg and Pieters, 2011).

Next time you feel jealous because someone else has achieved a desired goal, try to
see this as a good thing – it means the goal is totally achievable for you too.

Can They Enhance Memory Accuracy?

I touched on this briefly earlier in the article, but yes – it does seem as though
negative emotions can help improve our memory accuracy.

Psychological research seems to really back this as a concept. It seems that our
emotions increase our ability to access ‘mood-congruent’ information (so, information
associated with specific emotions) within our memory banks (Isen et al, 1978, Bower,
1981).

Kensinger, Garoff-Eaton, and Schacter (2006) found that participants who associated
negative emotions with different objects versus objects associated with neutral
emotions were more accurately able to recall exact visual details of the negatively
associated items.

Evidence has also shown that negative emotions enhance both our individual
impressions of how vivid the memory is, but also our ability to recall some details of
specific events (Kensinger 2007).

Imaging of the brain has also linked engagement with the emotional processing areas
of the brain and the areas related to encoding and retrieval of memory (Kensinger,
2007, Bisby and Burgess, 2017).

Negative Emotions and Motivation

There is some new research emerging connecting negative emotions with motivation.
Anger has by far been the main emotion explored in this area, and it’s one that’s been
repeatedly connected to encouraging and leading to motivation to act within a given
scenario, but there is more research needed (Harmon-Jones, Price, Gable and
Peterson, 2014).

Biswas-Diener and Kashdan (2014) came up with the idea of ‘wholeness’ – which
encourages us to see difficult or negative emotions as a part of the bigger picture of
overall happiness. They instruct us that a change is needed and we need to act on the
negative behavior to create the change that would lead us to further happiness.

These researchers advise that we need to channel our negative emotions

constructively to address our deeper needs and seek out positive outcomes.

‘Second wave’ positive psychology follows a similar vein. Ivtzan, Hefferon, and
Worth (2015) ascertain that this new approach to positive psychology sees us
embracing adversity, discomfort and negative emotions as a path to building better
resilience.

They see negative emotions as an important part of spiritual living and in coming to
terms with difficult emotions such as guilt or anxiety, we build a deeper connection
with who we want to be and how we want to show up in the world.

In the area of motivation, there is some interesting research on how negative emotions
can help us achieve learning goals. Early evidence looking at this connection has
suggested that negative emotions such as anxiety and fear in academic contexts are
detrimental to success.

Research so far has focused on test anxiety and how this negatively impacts test
results (Zeidner, 2014). Newer research is showing that this is more complex than it
seems. Rowe, Fitness, and Wood (2018) found that adult learners perceived negative
emotions as detrimental, they actually had a beneficial impact within some scenarios.

The researchers concluded that the role of negative emotions is more complex than
current research suggests.

I think, as we’ve explored, that it is our awareness and understanding of our negative
emotions that can lead to them having the best benefits within any given situation.
With greater understanding, we can further utilize our negative emotions to help
motivate us to achieve goals and find solutions to the challenges we might be facing.

How Can We Best Control and Deal with our Negative

Emotions?
One of the best ways to deal with our negative emotions is through acceptance.

Just as there are benefits to negative emotions, forcing ourselves to be happy all the
time can also be detrimental to our overall emotional wellbeing.
Accepting negative emotions, in ourselves and others, are all a part of being human
allows us to build better compassion for how they might present themselves and why.
Rather than becoming stuck in a mindset that negative emotions need to be avoided or
that they are somehow ‘wrong’ to experience, we need to accept they are a natural
part of who we are.

Once we do that we can really begin to change how we might respond to them and
develop behaviors that are meaningful and bring value to how we express ourselves
and engage with others.

6 Tips to Manage, Process and Embrace Negative

Emotions
As positive psychology has gained more insight into our negative emotions, it’s also
been able to provide us with multiple strategies for balancing these emotions within
our day to day lives.

Sims (2017) explored ways to proactively process and acknowledge negative

emotions and came up with the acronym TEARS of HOPE to help coach and guide
individuals. Here’s what it stands for:

T = Teach and Learn

This is the process of listening to what your body is trying to teach you through the
presentation of negative emotions, and learn what they mean. It’s building your own
personal knowledge of the way you respond to emotional states, interpreting the
signals your body is sending you, and acknowledging that they serve a purpose.

E = Express and enable

Negative emotions encourage us to express them. They are very actionable emotions.
The express and enable part of the acronym encourages you to explore this with
openness and curiosity. It’s about increasing your acceptance of your natural instincts
and enabling them to be present without resentment.

A= Accept and befriend

This follows on nicely from express and enable. It’s about befriending yourself and
the way you are as a human. Focus on increasing your acceptance with positive
affirmations to bring your sphere of negative emotions into a space of acceptance.
R = Re-appraise and re-frame

Once you’ve begun to accept that this is a natural part of who you are, you can begin
to focus on reframing the situation and how you react. Just because a negative
emotion has arisen, doesn’t mean you have to react in ways that are detrimental to you
and those around you.

Accepting negative emotions isn’t about accepting or excusing poor behaviors, it’s
about creating awareness for the self and others to create positive reactions.

S = Social support

Knowing that negative emotions are present in all of us, and in pretty much the same
way, can be a fantastic source of compassion and empathy to those around us. It’s
how we process our emotions that differ, so seeing someone in the throws of anger,
knowing that they are just handling a perceived threat can really encourage us to
approach them with compassion, rather than anger ourselves.

H = Hedonic wellbeing and happiness

This is the process of grouping positive experiences with negative. Because we more
readily recall negative experiences, it can be useful for us to group them with positive
experiences so we don’t fall into a ruminating trap. This way, we can focus more of
our energy on recalling the positive experiences.

O = Observe and attend

Take the time to really observe your reactions without ignoring them, repressing them,
or over exaggerating them. Use mindfulness to bring your focus to your mind and
body and what a particular emotion is creating within you. Attend to these reactions
without judgment.

P = Physiology and behavioral changes

Just as you observe your emotional and mental responses, observe your physiological
reactions too. Bring your focus to your breath, your heart rate and sense out the
changes in your physiology that a negative emotion may have caused. Again, attend to
these changes without judgment.

E = Eudaimonia
This might not be a word you are familiar with, but it’s well worth adding to your
vocabulary. Eudaimonia is a Greek word which basically refers to having a good
spirit. It means you have found a state of being that is happy, healthy and prosperous,
and you have learned to engage in actions that result in your overall wellbeing. It
means you’re actively striving towards a sense of authenticity in all you do.

I’ve gone through the research available and also collated the below tips to help you
manage, process and embrace negative emotions in ways that will help you to
understand and find value in them:

Envisage your ‘Best Possible Self’

If you feel like your negative emotions are getting the best of you, that you’re not
expressing them in healthy ways or getting stuck in ruminating behaviors, a simple
visualization technique could help.

Instead of focusing only on the negative emotion or what you’re doing wrong, focus
instead on what you would like the behavior to be.

What does the best possible version of you look like in that scenario? How would they
react? What would they say? How would they feel? What would they do after? You
can do this as a mental visual exercise or a journal exercise.

Taking the time once a week to practice this can have amazing results on not only
your mood but how you approach the scenario next time it comes around.

Practice Gratitude

Practicing gratitude has been shown to have wonderful effects for both the recipients
and givers. These effects have long reaching impacts on our mood and perception of
events, so it’s worth spending a little bit of time adding the practice to your weekly
repertoire.

Whether it’s for a small thing or a big thing, in person, over the phone, a letter or a
simple text message, letting someone know you appreciate them or something they
have done, can really make a difference in how you perceive and respond to negative
emotions.

Explore mindfulness techniques

If you find you have a short fuse and anger is your go-to negative emotion (or if you
find you’re always on the spectrum of the anger emotion, regularly experiencing
annoyance) mindfulness could help to reframe what you’re feeling.

Follow the TEARS of HOPE guidance and take the time to understand why you may
be responding in this way. Mindfulness can help you find the headspace to do this in a
positive way.

Learn how to respond versus react

Do you know the difference between how you respond versus how you react?
Negative emotions often encourage us to react immediately to a given scenario. When
we feel angry, we may lash out or shout. When we become sad, we may withdraw and
reject people around us.

Sometimes we need to act on these impulses, but mostly we don’t. By exploring your
negative emotions you can start to develop your understanding of how you react, and
instead start to switch this to positive ways of responding – which could mean
learning that no reaction is required at all.

Know when to take a break

Know when to take a day to yourself. If you are constantly experiencing negative
emotions and struggling to manage them, your body is telling you something isn’t
right.

Take a day to re-center. Fill this day with positive experiences, doing the things that
you know fuel you and make you feel good. This kind of break can help to realign
your thinking, give you some space to refocus on why you might be experiencing the
negative emotions, and come up with some positive coping strategies.

This is just a quick collation of the tips I felt would be most helpful, but it all comes
down to you as an individual. Some of them may work really well, and others not so
much. Make sure you try out a few different strategies and find the ones that work
best for you.
How to

Erase Negative Influence and Live Positively

How will you create and demonstrate ways to manage different emotions?
What are the ways to manage various emotions?
What are the 10 emotion management strategies?
What is the important thing to consider in managing your emotions?
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US&biw=1280&bih=553&ei=dhssZPipA5PR-Qbl0KTgCQ&ved=0ahUKEwj4vJiwoJD-
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