GuideDesigning

to
Group Conversations
What if you thought of a meeting as a series of conversations?
What if you knew the person leading the meeting had a plan for
each and every conversation?
Think it would make a difference?

The Basic Blocks of a Conversation

S Desired outcomes Other set-up pieces
E
 
T
 
U
 
P
Where do we
want to be at 
the end of this
conversation? 
P 
R How will we work
through this?
O 
C  How much time will
E we give ourselves for
S  each part?
S 
What actions
will follow? 

C
L Next steps (X by Y) Other closure pieces
O  
S  
U
 
R
E

CONTEXTUAL PROGRAM DESIGNS. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. PA U L A X T E L L . C O M 1

 Process Steps for Six Common
Conversations
These designs will handle 80 percent of the normal meeting topics.

Checking progress Starting on a project

Where do we stand on this?
 What have we committed to?


Everyone clear about where we are?

 What specifically are the outcomes?


Are we satisfied with our progress?

 What’s the timeline?


Concerns, thoughts, ideas?

 What will it take to produce this?

Next steps?
 What milestones make sense?

Next update?
 What actions will get us started?


Requesting input Making a decision

Here’s the situation.
 Here’s the decision we need to make.

Here’s where I am about it.
 What are the objectives?

Questions, thoughts and ideas?
 What are the decision criteria?

What else?
 What alternatives do we have?

Anything else?
 What are the benefits/risks of each?

OK, here’s what I’ve heard.
 Which way should we go?

Here’s what I’m going to do.
 Everyone OK with this?

Everyone OK with this?
 How do we communicate this?


Responding to a problem Reaching alignment

What do we know?
 Here’s what I’d like to do.

What questions need to be answered?
 What questions do you have?

What criteria should shape our response?
 Clear? Make sense?

What are our options?
 Can you support this?

Other thoughts?
 If not, let’s discuss.

What will we do?
 OK, here’s where we are.


CONTEXTUAL PROGRAM DESIGNS. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. PA U L A X T E L L . C O M 2

 Other process steps that might be
used in designing a conversation
Analyzing a situation:
What’s the situation?
What do we know about this?
What else is included in this?
What are all the themes here?
Any other views, or perspectives?
What information do we need?
How should we work on these?
What options do we have?
Threats/opportunities of each?
Reaching for alignment:
Here’s what I’d like to do.
What questions do you have?
Is this clear?
Does it make sense?
Do you see the value in it?
What do you need to align with this?
Is there anything in your way?
Is there anything missing, you need?
Any show-stoppers for you?
Can everyone live with this?
Can you support this?
Making a decision:
What decision process will we use?
Whose decision is it?
Who needs to be involved or consulted?
Who has veto power?
What are the objectives?
What are the decision criteria?
What are the alternatives?
Associated benefits and risks?
What is the best decision?
What could go wrong?
How can we prevent it?
What can go right?
How can we maximize it?
Are we vulnerable in anyway?
Will this decision limit us in the future?
How will we communicate this?
CONTEXTUAL PROGRAM DESIGNS. ALL
Creating a goal:
What have we been asked to produce?
What is expected of us?
What difference do we want to make?
What do we know is possible?
What do we think might be possible?
What are we willing to guarantee?
What are we willing to go for?
What will we publicly commit to?
Checking in with people:
Where are you with this?
Is this clear?
Any questions about this?
Reactions, thoughts, ideas?
What do you think?
Checking for completion:
What else about this?
Anything that hasn’t been said?
Anything that you are curious about?
Any concerns or worries?
Everyone ready to move on?
Anything you need to say or ask?
Summarizing and next steps:
So, where are we?
Let’s see if we can summarize this.
Where do we go from here?
What are the next steps?
What are the next milestones?
Who will do what, by when?
Who will track this for us?
Do we need on-going meetings?
Who needs to be included or informed?
—Steve Jobs, Apple founder
RIGHTS RESERVED. PA U L A X T E L L . C O M 3
 What might be covered in the set up?
What do you want to produce?
Outcomes:
What does success look like?
What do you want from people?

What’s needed to bring people up to speed?

Background:
What’s the context for this conversation?

Acknowledge: Any concerns you have coming in?

Any concerns you expect participants might have?

Process: What process steps will we use?
How much time will we allow?
Do we need to track this conversation on charts?
How will we capture this conversation?

What might be covered in the closing?

Next steps: What happens next?
Who will do what by when?
Who will keep track of progress between meetings?

Alignment: Is everyone OK with where we ended up?

Anyone not able to live with this?

Completion: Anything else that needs to be said or asked?

Accomplishments: What did we produce?

What are you taking away from this conversation?

Acknowledgment: Anyone here who we need to acknowledge?

Anyone who isn’t here who we need to acknowledge?

Great meetings don’t just happen—they’re designed.

Producing a great meeting is a lot like producing a great product.
You don’t just build it. You think about it, plan it, and design it.
— Michael Gegeman, 3M Company

CONTEXTUAL PROGRAM DESIGNS. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. PA U L A X T E L L . C O M 4

 As seen on:
Meetings Matter
With step-by-step strategies for mastering the skills needed to design, lead, and participate
in group conversations, this book is intended to revolutionize meetings, bringing them to
vital health and productivity.
This is what the judges who named it the Best Business Book of 2015 had to say:
“This book should be given to every new first-time supervisor or manager; it will change
the life of those individuals who are thrust into leadership roles with no preparation.”

Ten Powerful Things to Say to Your Kids

I’ve spent decades helping people be more effective in the workplace, and this book takes
that advice to the home front to help parents create remarkable relationships with their
children. Thus far, it has been translated into Korean, Vietnamese, Chinese, Arabic, and
Spanish.
Named Best Parenting Book of 2012, Ten Powerful Things to Say to Your Kids
empowers parents to be more conscious of what they say and how they speak to their kids.
It provides simple, straightforward ideas for making deep, meaningful connections that will
last forever. As one parent said, “This book should come with every newborn.”

Being Remarkable
Gleaned from more than 30 years of coaching people toward greater personal
effectiveness, this small but power-packed guide serves up timeless wisdom to help you be
remarkable—in your career, in your relationships, and in your life.
Filled with clear action items and empowering perspectives, this book keeps these ideas
fresh in your mind, developing the awareness that is the beginning of true and lasting
change. As one executive coach put it, “This body of knowledge is life changing.”

I’m proud of these books and believe they can have an impact on how we live and work
together. And I have a favor to ask.
n If these books sound interesting to you—whether you’re a longtime participant in my
­ orkshops or new to the party—please consider buying a copy.
w
n If you already have a book and found it useful, please consider buying copies for friends
or colleagues (if you do buy multiple copies, send me an email so I can thank you
personally).
The books are all available on my website, paulaxtell.com. Meetings Matter and
Ten Powerful Things to Say to Your Kids are available on Amazon, Barnes and Noble,
IndieBound, Powell’s, and anywhere else books are sold.

Link to Paul online—share with your networks:

@AskPaulAxtell /paulaxtell

For free updates and downloadable resources, visit paulaxtell.com

CONTEXTUAL PROGRAM DESIGNS. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. PA U L A X T E L L . C O M 5