THE DILLEMA BASED ON MY LIFE EXPERIENCE:

Decision-making is an exhausting task to follow through and

making one is predominantly draining to my own willpower. This is
what I’m experiencing to this present moment right from the
beginning of my second year college just a year ago. I had always
thought that I’d waste time not doing and executing my own
decisions based on the things that I really like to pursue and
the subjects I’m really interested to learn. But now, the feeling
of regret is getting bigger and bigger the longer I keep my sole
interest in changing my course in college. And yes, it’s a long
process to partake and has a lot of things to consider and my
plans can affect the way my family handles this kind of
situation.

I knew I was going to experience this feeling, and so my

conscience still bothers me a lot. It begins when I am finding a
suitable lifetime job that matches my personality, capability,
educational background and skills of understanding. I was a
graduate of HUMSS and in the back of my mind, I suppose to have
graduated STEM, but because the school that I was studying back
then was lacking of enough supplies, not to mention teachers that
can handle STEM subjects, the advisor put me in the HUMSS strand.
I graduated High School with a 90 GPA and got into a University,
(where I am studying right now) without any preparation and time
to consider what my interests are at that point. So I chose a
Bachelor’s Degree that was available for me at that time without
doing a background check or even doing research on the given
field (and yes, it is a terrible sin but I need to rush my
decisions because months are over and the 1 semester is going to
st

start).

While I’m doing my course, I dedicate some of my free time

doing research on some interesting courses that I’m interested in
and the job they might offer after graduation. I finally came to
the result I needed and my interests lean into the job demand,
job satisfaction and pay and the interesting part is that I
became interested in the subjects of business, social sciences,
and mathematics. As time went by, I became distracted and became
uninterested in doing lab research and making future science
projects. I became concerned and had tons of anxieties of “what
happens next” and I sometimes hated my time doing some
schoolworks. Of course, I still didn’t neglect my duty as a
college student and still compile to my professor’s lab works,
pass exams, do a good job in participating in class, attend
meetings and classes and make sure I am getting good grades until
the end of the semester, but my heart is not there.
 I thought to myself that this was just one of my struggles
and I have to march on, move forward and make a decision based on
what information is available. I have shared my concerns to my
parents, but to my expectation, they didn’t want me to transfer,
because of the following reason: 

1. The school will charge me a tuition fee if I choose to

transfer course. 
2. I have already spent two years of my life in this
course and so they expect me to graduate. 
3. They want me to graduate immediately so that I can have
an independent life and finally support them
financially.

I can still make a decision for myself but this time I am

waiting for the semester to end and then execute it. Choosing a
degree like in my case takes a lot of time and serious focus on
what my future might be, taking consideration to one’s own skill
set, choosing whether what problem to solve, and love for the
subjects. My college experience is not smooth and it’s much like
a bumpy road, because I have no idea what to do or what to pursue
in the first place. Yes, I was very clueless in my freshman year,
but now I got this nagging feeling of where I suppose to belong
and what career I am going to pursue in the future. This teaches
me a life lesson that life is still going and time really matters
so as my future career.