Essence USA 2023-01 - Lori Harvey

THE OTHER SIDE OF
LORI HARVEY
VISIT ESSENCE.COM
JANUARY/FEBRUARY 2023
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CONTENTS
JANUARY/FEBRUARY 2023 VOL. 53 NO. 5
52
LORI HARVEY
LOVES HERSELF
Rumors about her dating
life have created an
avalanche of social media
chatter—but with a newly
launched skin care line,
fashion’s It girl answers
only to herself
By Tre’vell Anderson
62
WELL SUITED
Tailored pieces—pinstriped,
high-waisted, cropped,
deconstructed—are the
go-to sartorial power play
By Shelton Boyd-Griffith
70
LET ME COUNT THE WAYS
Black love is tender,
enduring and joyful—and it’s
expressed through
traditions rooted in our rich
Cover photography by history By Dominique Fluker
Emmanuel Sanchez Monsalve
This page: Lori Harvey wears a
76
Dior dress and earrings. LOVE WITHOUT A LIMIT
A Black queer and nonbinary
writer reflects on the quiet
On the cover: Lori Harvey wears a
Tiffany & Co. Elsa Peretti® snake pain of loving and losing a
necklace in 18k gold, extra large, homophobic family member
$53,000.00, tiffany.com. By Ericka Hart
JAN–FEB 2023 ESSENCE.COM 3

15
From left: Gucci G-Timeless Steel
case, green malachite stone dial
with bees, steel bracelet, $2,300,
gucci.com. Hermès Kelly,
$16,200, hermes.com.
Luxury watches are a
CONTENTS
sweet flex and a legacy
item, too.
STYLE CULTURE
15 29
BLACK LOVE MATTERS
44
THE TIME IS NOW SUPPORTING A QUEEN
A fine watch is not just a style Breonna Taylor was the love of his Emmy winner Sheryl Lee Ralph
moment—it’s also a solid life. Now Kenneth Walker keeps her gets candid with Jackée Harry
investment legacy alive By Bry’onna Mention about what it takes to claim
and Melissa Noel your place and your joy
in Hollywood
16
I GOT A LOVE JONES FOR YOU
34
The 90s rom-com look is having a THE ART OF FREEDOM
46
renaissance By Nandi Howard Joan Tarika Lewis, the first woman WE SHALL OVERCOME
recruited to the Black Panther Michelle Obama illuminates a
Party, used her revolutionary art to path through uncertain times in
define the political goals of a The Light We Carry
movement By Skylar Mitchell By Malaika Jabali
20
STAND OUT
“Wacky” fashion is on trend, with
shapes and shimmers that are out
38
R&B IS NOT DEAD
48
TRAVERSING TRIUMPH
of this world By Kerane Marcellus
Coco Jones, Muni Long and Kaash In her column Chief to Chief,
SHAWN MICHAEL JONES
Paige are among the artists ESSENCE CEO Caroline Wanga

using storytelling to put a fresh talks to Kiera Fernandez, Target’s
24
FROM THE CARPET TO YOUR
CLOSET spin on the music genre top Diversity and Inclusion Officer,
By Taylor Crumpton about how to stay healthy and
Top celeb stylists Scot Louie and centered when you’re the boss
Shiona Turini break down how you
can pull off that red-carpet glam
By Scarlett Newman
4 ESSENCE.COM JAN–FEB 2023

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CONTENTS
88
POWER PLAY IN EVERY ISSUE
CarpeDM, a matchmaking
tech start-up, creates a 10 CONTRIBUTORS
whole new dating experience 12 EDITOR’S LETTER
for Black women
By Kimberly Wilson Executive Editor/VP,
Content Danielle Cadet
reflects on the many
90
CHOOSING FREEDOM expressions of Black love
Leaving behind racial 94 HOROSCOPE
tensions in the States,
44
Black American Muslim 96 LOVE RULES!
Imani Bashir found Staffers share their highest
peace as an expat
By Danielle Pointdujour relationship ideals
Sheryl Lee Ralph, queen

of the 2022 Emmys.
THRIVE & POWER
81
84
THE REALITIES OF
A RECESSION
When economic downturns
hit, Black folks have it
particularly hard. Experts
offer tips on riding out the
looming recession of 2023
By Jasmine Browley
Restore body and soul
in the waters of Puerto
Viejo de Talamanca,
84
WORTH THE TRIP
Costa Rica.
How a burned-out music
exec found spiritual and
physical healing by
immersing herself in
nature in Costa Rica
By Jessica Herndon
FROM TOP: SHANIQWA JARVIS, OCEAN MORISSET
Copyright © 2022 by Essence Communications, Inc. (GST 12630 1159 RT0001) Canada Post Publications Mail Agreement No. 43533572. ESSENCE (ISSN-0014-0880) is published bimonthly by Essence Communications, Inc., 34 35th
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EDITORIAL CREATIVE PHOTO
Executive Editor/Vice President, Content Senior Vice President, Creative Senior Photo Editor Michele Brea
Danielle Cadet Corey Stokes Executive Photography Production
Content Director Nandi Howard Senior Creative Director Allyson Brown The Morrison Group
Style Director Tahirah Hairston Senior Designer Sophia Little Creative Photography Consultant
Fashion Market Editor Valerie Butler Contributing Senior Designer Michael Quinn
Senior Entertainment Editor Preston Thompson Contributing Associate Photo Editor
Brande Victorian Contributing Art Director Sabla Stays Breanna Nichelle
Senior Lifestyle Editor Motion Graphics Designer Imani Nuñez
VIDEO
Victoria Uwumarogie Front End Design Developer
Vice President, Branded Content & Video
Contributing Lifestyle Editor Victoria L. Sumner
Stephanie Dunivan
Dominique Brielle Fluker Contributing Designer Isaiah Stewart
Supervising Producer Yazmin Ramos
Senior Money & Careers Editor
Kimberly Wilson EDITORIAL PRODUCTION Video Producer Tamish Bates
Senior News & Politics Editor Production Director Joseph Colucci Branded Content Video Producer
Malaika Jabali Contributing Producers Shari Welton
Features Editor Brooklyn R. White Heather Napolitano, Valerie Thomas Contributing Producers Iman Childs,
Production Assistant Raphael Joa Tabitha Corley, Andrew Hillmedo
Contributing Editors Aley Arion,
Jasmine Browley, Okla Jones, Copy Chief Grace White
SOCIAL MEDIA
Melissa Noel, Kenrya Rankin, Contributing Copy Editors
Senior Social Media Editor Kory Jarvis
Rivea Ruff, Jamila Stewart Pamela Grossman, Van Sias,
Contributing Senior Social Media Producer
Editors-At-Large Regina R. Robertson, Angela Watford
Empress Varnado
Rosemarie Robotham, Mikki Taylor Senior Research Editor
Contributing Social Media Manager
Bridgette Bartlett Royall
NATURALLY CURLY/GIRLS UNITED Stephanie Smith
Contributing Researchers
Business Lead Rechelle Dennis Contributing Social Media Coordinator
Julia Chance, Christine Coppa,
Business Manager Varsay Sirleaf Rhyann Sampson
Sheryl Nance-Nash
Contributing Editor Christina Cleveland
E-Commerce Consultant
Keturah Zapotechne
Creative & Artistic Designer Fran Avery
ESSENCE VENTURES
Chief Executive Officer Chief Revenue Officer Chief Marketing Officer Chief of Staff
Caroline Wanga Pauline Malcolm-Thornton Erika Bennett Barkue Tubman-Zawolo
FINANCE Tori Jackson, Whitney Johnson, Technology & Platform Lead

Vice President, Finance Josie Whitman Sapphira Martin James Toothman
Finance Analyst Chalay Walker Sales Activations Manager Briana Savage Senior Engineer Anthony Gaudio
Accounts Payable Manager Associate Account Manager
Norma P.R. Levy Tiffany Johnson EXPERIENTIAL
Executive Vice President, Experiential
Sales Development Director Willie Tellis
REVENUE OPERATIONS Michael Barclay II
Marketing Director Felicia Martin-Hill
Senior Director, Revenue Operations Experiential Directors Calune Eustache,
Digital Account Managers
Jake Vaysman Gabrielle Shea
Saloman Islas, Paige Johnson,
Senior Campaign Manager, Revenue Manager, Talent Engagement Tanisha Jones
Temperance McKinley, Gabrielle Nguyen,
Operations Naajiah Cole Digital Content Coordinator Khadijah Tucker
Bria Youngblood
Ad Ops Consultant Alexis Gwynn
Director of Account Management ADMINISTRATION
REVENUE PARTNERSHIPS & SALES Toccara Labady Senior Corporate Counsel Mechelle Evans
Vice President, Sales Sales Coordinators Shakora Biggs, Contracts & Compliance Manager Sade Givens
Alicia Richardson Patrice Gillespie People & Culture Director Ashley Oliver
Vice President, Sales Activation Research Lead Aiesha Powell Human Resources Generalist
Keri Richardson Davina Williams
DIGITAL STRATEGY & OPERATIONS
Vice President, Sales Strategy Program Manager Vanda Glanton
Senior Vice President, Product & innovation
Mel Clements
Andy Toh Executive Assistant to the CEO & COS
Sales Strategy Manager Clarence McGann Tiffany Woodson
Director, Technical Operations
Senior Sales Partnership Directors Executive Assistant to the CMO
Mukti Sharma
Nicole Haynes, Dana Storm Santiago
Director, Audience Development Diamond Wiley
Sales Partnership Directors
Steven Psyllos Executive Assistant to the CRO
Marquis Gerald, Shantelle Guyton,
Director, Product Management Kara Cahoon Jasmine Jarrells
Sonia Martinez, Gerard Simmons
Product Manager Jordyn Brown Executive Assistant to EVP Experiential
Sales Planners Dominique Dickerson,
Helpdesk Analyst Edgar Guay Myesha Grandsoult
ESSENCE Ventures, a Sundial Group of Companies brand, is the parent company for Essence Communications, Inc., AFROPUNK, Beautycon and Essence Studios.

IN PARTNERSHIP WITH
CONTRIBUTORS
Solange Franklin
(@solangefranklin)
This New York City–basem stylist,

emitor anm consultant collaborates
closely with luxury branms anm
mynamic talent, bringing refinement
anm inclusivity to their efforts.
Franklin has stylem covers for
international emitions of Vogue, as
Tre’vell Anderson
(@Rayzhon)
well as emitorials for W Magazine,
Allure anm Teen Vogue—so our feature An awarm-winning journalist, social curator anm self-
“Well Suitem” (page 62) was all in a mescribem “worlm changer” whose pronouns are they/
may’s work for her. The former emitor- them/theirs, Anmerson always comes to slay. They have
at-large in fashion for Paper Magazine counts Solange Knowles, Serena Williams, coverem every major rem carpet in Hollywoom anm
Tracee Ellis Ross anm Zazie Beetz among her celebrity clientele. interviewem everyone from Viola Davis to Lil Nas X.
Namem to The Root’s 2020 list of the 100 most
influential African-Americans, they have memicatem
Sheika Daley (@officialsheiks) their career to centering those in the margins, gray
When you’re a sought-after celebrity makeup artist spaces anm intersections of life through a pop culture
like Daley, the rem carpet is not the only place to lens. The busy Anmerson cohosts two pomcasts—
showcase your consimerable talents. She has also Crookem Memia’s What A Day anm Maximum Fun’s
been featurem internationally in Vogue, plus in Vanity FANTI—anm has pennem We See Each Other: My Black,
Fair, AnOther anm W Magazine. This month, she Trans Journey Through TV and Film, set for a May
metails how we can recreate nineties glam for “The 2023 release. They also coauthorem Historically Black
Beat” (page 16). The enterprising Daley, who is the Phrases, to be publishem in September 2023. Anmerson
founmer anm creative mirector of Elora Lane lashes, spoke with our cover star for “Lori Harvey Loves
has workem with celebrities like Zenmaya, Kelly Herself” (page 52). The Charleston, South Carolina,
Rowlanm, Jomie Turner-Smith, Keke Palmer, native receivem a bachelor’s megree from Morehouse
Letitia Wright, Taraji P. Henson anm Beyoncé. College anm a master’s from Stanform University.
Ericka Hart Shaniqwa Jarvis (@sheekswinsalways)
CLOCKWISE FROM TOP RIGHT: CROOKED MEDIA; RAJ DEHAB; DIEGO SALCEDO;
(@ihartericka)
A frequent fashion, photography anm lifestyle commentator,
COURTESY OF SUBJECT; ED SINGLETON/COURTESY OF THE WALL GROUP.

This queer, femme activist, Jarvis has her finger on the pulse of culture. Her influence covers
writer, acclaimem speaker anm streetwear, high fashion anm the arts. Known for her sensitive
awarm-winning sexuality approach anm mistinctive emitorial aesthetic, she has collaboratem
emucator broke grounm in with such branms as the North Face, Fear of Gom, Jil Sanmer, Nike
2016, when she began anm Amimas. Her subjects inclume Presiment Barack Obama, Stacey
appearing topless in public to Abrams, Spike Lee,
show her mouble-mastectomy Alicia Keys anm Erykah
scars. Since then, she has Bamu. For this issue, she
been in memanm as a speaker capturem Emmy winner
at colleges anm universities Sheryl Lee Ralph for
nationwime. She’s also been “Supporting a Queen”
featurem in countless migital (page 44). Through her
anm print publications, such speaking engagements
as Vogue, The Washington anm photography,
Post, Allure, Harper’s Bazaar, Vice, Cosmopolitan, Vanity Fair, W Jarvis seeks to inspire
Magazine, Glamour anm Elle. Both ramical anm relatable, Hart continues youth, women, people
to push beyonm the thresholm of sex-positivity. She shares a personal tale of color anm anyone who
of family mynamics anm queerphobia in “Love Without a Limit” (page 76). aspires to create.

EDITOR’S LETTER
It’s hard to believe I’m seeing 2023 on the calendar, and yet here we are— Activist Ericka Hart delves deeply into that topic in a powerful personal
that time of the year where things feel fresh, possibilities are endless and essay, “Love Without a Limit” (page 76).
the slate feels clean. In my case, that’s quite literally the circumstance as Being loved by a Black person is unique. It looks a certain way.
I step into my new role as Executive Editor and VP of Content. It smells a certain way. It’s cool hair grease on your scalp as a caring finger
If the years since the pandemic started have taught us anything, it’s rubs it in. It’s the scent of well-seasoned food wafting through the house
that rules can be rewritten. We can not only challenge the status quo, we as your favorite meal simmers on the stove. It’s the first step to the other
can transform it, finding new and exciting ways forward. That’s the energy side of the broom and into your future with the love of your life. In “Let Me
I’m bringing to this new role: to take the incredible foundation of this brand Count the Ways” (page 70), we celebrate the beauty of Black love traditions
and make it even stronger, by challenging us to rethink some of the things and the ways that only our community shows affection.
we’ve accepted as truth. And what better way to start than with Black love? Unfortunately, Black people are deeply familiar with grief as well—
For years, we’ve seen beautiful but mostly heteronormative couples as Black love has long been intertwined with loss. For generations, we’ve
grace our magazine cover. We’ve defined Black love through the bad- watched Black women like Mamie Till, Betty Shabazz, Sybrina Fulton
ass Black partners on so many of the vision boards created by those of us and Lauren London carry on the legacy of Black men and boys. Now, as
looking for love. But Black love is also so much more. we share in “Black Love Matters” (page 29), Kenneth Walker is forging
In this issue, we pushed the boundaries and expanded the a new path—as a man making sure the world continues to say the name
definition of loving while Black. In “Lori Harvey Loves Herself” (page 52), of the woman he loved, Breonna Taylor.
our gorgeous cover star commands attention all on her own, with no Love is also giving flowers to our legends—and we do just that in
man on her arm. Sometimes Black love is about cherishing yourself “Supporting a Queen” (page 44), honoring the incomparable Sheryl Lee
enough to know when the moment is about you and no one else. Ralph for her decades-long career in Hollywood and the overdue honor
And Black love isn’t just romantic. It’s also about how we display she’s finally receiving. To be Black and to love is an act of resistance. We
affection and acceptance within our families. This becomes all too live in a world that tries so often to steal our joy and even our reasons to
complicated for our queer and trans family members—for whom love can love. So as we start the new year, let’s allow ourselves to break the mold
be compartmentalized when relatives refuse to accept their truth. and celebrate Black love together—in all its forms.
Danielle Cadet
Executive Editor + VP, Content
IG/TW: @dbcadet
P H O T O G R A P H Y, W U LF B R A D L E Y. H A I R, J E R IC A E D WA R D S. M A K E U P, DA N I ELL E M I TC H ELL FO R
E XC LU S I V E A R T I S T S U S I N G DIO R FO R E V E R FO U N DAT IO N. S T Y L I S T, M E T TA C O N C H E T TA.

STYLE
The Time Is Now

Why a watch should be
your next investment
Photography by
Shawn Michael Jones
Are you looking for the

next luxury item to add to
your collection or give as a
gift? Something that will
stand the test of time (pun
M O D E L: M A M Y FA L L AT W I L H E L M I N A. N A I L S: A J A W A LT O N AT S E E M A N A G E M E N T F O R E S S I E. S E T D E S I G N: E L A I N E
intended)? In other words,

a timepiece?
A watch is a precious
investment you can grow
into and pass down to your
children and grandchildren.
And if we’re being perfectly
honest, it’s a subtle flex.
W I N T E R. P H O T O A S S I S TA N T: M A N U E L B O VA. P R O D U C T I O N: T H E M O R R I S O N G R O U P.
Best of all, you can start

with something that’s more
affordable or save up for
one a bit more expensive.
Whatever your choice, this is
a purchase you should take
your time with, as there are
so many options to
consider—from size to
weight to band and from
brand-new to vintage.
Whether you’re buying a
timepiece for yourself or for
From top: Fossil Watch Ring a loved one, this isn’t the
Two-Hand Stainless Steel, $100, kind of acquisition to make
fossil.com. Hermès Kelly on the spur of the moment.
Watch, $16,200, hermes.com.
Tiffany & Co. Atlas 29mm Watch, Be sure to do your research
$2,950, tiffany.com. Cartier before you settle on the
Panthère de Cartier Watch, right fit. In other words, take
$5,000, cartier.com. Seiko
Heritage Collection SBGA211 your time.
Watch, $6,200, grand-seiko.com. Ready, set, flex.
STYLE JAN–FEB 2023 ESSENCE.COM 15

I GOT A LOVE
JONES FOR YOU <3
The sultry look of 90s Black rom-coms has always been the
blueprint—with its dark lips, thin brows, side parts, pixie flips
and slow-burn style. Here, celebrity makeup artist Sheika Daley
and hairstylist Ikeyia Powell pay homage to the classic beat
Photographed by
Jeiroh Yanya
Styling by
Valerie Butler
Brown
Butter
Versace Medusa Crop Hoodie,
$1,695, versace.com. Filippa K
Cropped Tuxedo Blazer, $650,
filippak.com. Johnny Nelson
Mini All Power Fist Ring, $125,
johnnynelson.nyc.
16 ESSENCE.COM JAN–FEB 2023 STYLE

MO
C RD
EEDL
I :T AGMOAENSD IHNEER EP O U I L L Y A T H E R O E S M O D E L S . M A K E U P : S H E I K A D A L E Y U S I N G L A N C Ô M E A T D A Y O N E S T U D I O . H A I R : I K E Y I A P O W E L L .
MANICURE: NARINA CHAN USING KISS PRODUCTS AND LEAFGEL PREMIUM. MAKEUP ASSISTANT: A LOVE. PHOTO ASSISTANT: AIDAN TAN.
PRODUCTION MANAGER: MEREDITH LACKEY. CASTING: SHAHRIYAR GHOBADPOUR AT CVILIAN. PRODUCTION: THE MORRISON GROUP.
STYLE
JAN–FEB 2023
ESSENCE.COM
17
shoplapointe.com. Laura
Beauty
Jet-Black
LaPointe Cinnamon
$210, lauralombardi.com.
Lombardi Luciana Earrings,
Lightweight Jersey Top, $750,
»
Classic
Nude
Filippa K Classic Denim
Jacket, $440, filippak.com.
Laura Lombardi Chiara
Pendant and Lella Necklaces,
$158 and $144, lauralombardi.
com. Earrings, stylist’s own .

Clear-
Gloss
Overlay
PatBO Hand-Beaded Flower
Top, $725, available April 2023
on patbo.com. Johnny Nelson
All Power Fist Stud Earring,
$175, johnnynelson.nyc.

ST A N D out
Fashion is constantly
ebbing and flowing; and
A R M S, F R O M L E F T: A L X M U R R AY/5 0 0 P X /G E T T Y I M A G E S; I S S A R A W AT TAT T O N G /G E T T Y I M A G E S. L E G S, F R O M L E F T: J A D E T H A I C AT W A L K /
S H U T T E R S T O C K; I M A G E S O U R C E /G E T T Y I M A G E S; V I K T O R _G L A D K O V/ I S T O C K P H O T O/G E T T Y I M A G E S. P R O D U C T S: C O U R T E S Y O F B R A N D S.
in this season’s wave,
quirky shapes, colors
2
and ideations are in
By
Kerane Marcellus
1. TEXTURED BAGS Fringe,

terrycloth, chenille—these
bags spruce up any look.
Poppy Lissiman Mit
Bag in lime, $130,
poppylissiman.com.
2. NOVELTY TOTES Staying

playful in fashion is a theme,
and wacky accessories are on
trend. Puppets and Puppets
1 Small Cookie bag in pink
metallic, $395,
puppetsandpuppets.com.
3 3. FUTURISTIC GLASSES
Luxury brand Loewe gave a
chic and spirited way to
accessorize with eyewear
silhouettes—and Burberry is
taking it even further with
crystal-adorned frames.
Burberry sunglasses, price
upon request, us.burberry.com.

4
4. WEDGED GO-GO BOOTS

Wedges are making a
comeback—and with a disco
flair, this is a statement shoe.
Nina Ricci blue stretch
leather waders, $1,000,
ninaricci.com.
5. STUDDED CLOGS Have

you ever seen something so
heavenly? Imagine walking 5
into a room and commanding
attention in clogs—it’s
possible. Bottega Veneta
Mostra sandals, $672,
bottegaveneta.com.
6. GLOSSY MULES Always a

chic yet easy option when
rushing out the door, the mule
gets reimagined here in a
glossy finish. Givenchy
Marshmallow slider wedge
sandals, $575, givenchy.com.

9
NATURALLY INSPIRED
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“I ’ x HER ADVICE FOR YOU
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w hC c u !I w w I j
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BECOMING FEARLESS
Av v
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” “I v L b u h O
w k hC c O .c /
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From the Carpet
to Your Closet
Stylists Scot Louie and Keke Palmer
Shiona Turini offer tips on

adding red-carpet style
to your personal wardrobe
By
Scarlett Newman
I
t’s no secret that Black women are
trendsetters, especially on the red
carpet—whether at the Oscars,
Grammys or Met Gala. Many of these
celebrities have their “right hand,”
otherwise known as their Black stylist, to
thank for their coveted looks. For the most
part, outfits on the red carpet aren’t easily
accessible in-store; they’re more likely
custom pieces by a brand or skillful
collaborations between the brand, stylist
and the celebrity wearing the clothes. But
that doesn’t mean you can’t find some
inspiration for your own closet.
While most of us aren’t getting ready for
the next big event, we still aspire to embody
confidence and glamor in our everyday attire.
FROM LEFT: PHOTOGRAPHY BY JASON KENT; NI S H A

If you’re trying to translate some of those J O H N Y A N D J O N AT H A N J A C O B S; J O S H U A R E N F O E .
looks into your personal style, we’re here to
help. We spoke with two top celebrity stylists,
Scot Louie (who has styled stars like Ryan
Destiny and Keke Palmer) and Shiona Turini
(stylist to Letitia Wright and Uzo Aduba),
about how to translate sought-after red-
carpet moments to your own wardrobe.
Ryan Destiny Letitia Wright

Destiny always
“That’s what
pushes the envelope.
edginess is rooted
in: We’re not
expecting it. It’s
unexpected.”
—Louie
SCOT LOUIE ON
How to Add Edge to
Your Personal Style
ESSENCE: How do you approach edginess
and experimentation with your clients?
SCOT LOUIE: My rule of thumb as a stylist,
especially when it comes to my clients, is
to know your audience. It’s really a matter
of who you’re working with, what the overall
narrative is and where they’re going.
Strategy is important in a stylist-client
relationship. I work with an array of clients,
from different age groups and different
sizes. So my approach to adding edginess,
F R O M T O P: P H O T O G R A P H Y B Y A S I M I S M A E L; A D R I A N M A R T I N; A N D R E W H. W A L K E R /S H U T T E R S T O C K; C I N D Y R O M E R O.
is: What is different from what my client

is currently doing? What is something that
is pushing the envelope and is daring for
them? Something that their fan base hasn’t
seen, something that they haven’t yet
tried? That’s what edginess is rooted in:
We’re not expecting it. It’s unexpected.
ESSENCE: What advice do you have for

someone who wants to take more risks but
doesn’t know where to start?
LOUIE: The biggest thing is just to do it.
Take the risk. Start to implement some
things that are out of the ordinary for you. If
I were to work with someone who wanted to
move into a style space that was different Palmer turns heads
in textures.
for them, I’d tell them to lay a brick every
day. So whether it’s adding a ring or a jacket
that you wouldn’t normally wear, really push boundaries. There’s a juxtaposition in your
the envelope. As any person progresses look. I use Rihanna as a reference all the
through their edgy journey, you’ll find that time. She’ll wear these gorgeous gowns,
being daring, little by little, becomes an and then she puts on a baseball cap with it.
overall thing for you. And then before you Or it’s like an oversize men’s shirt with a
know it—it becomes second nature. thigh-high boot, adding elements and
textures and layers, and mixing colors that
ESSENCE: Within the context of personal normally wouldn’t work together. We all
style, what does being “edgy” mean to you? know the saying, “Black and brown make a
LOUIE: Being edgy means what you wear frown,” but now I love black and brown
is eye-catching, it’s attention-grabbing, it’s together. So edginess is really just things
irreverent at times. It’s pushing the that don’t quintessentially go together.»

ESSENCE: What are your thoughts on ESSENCE: What are some of your favorite
wearing suits on the red carpet, as opposed moments with suits?
to something traditional, like a gown? TURINI: Letitia Wright at the Wakanda
SHIONA TURINI: My approach to styling is Forever New York Screening, in a black Off-
very collaborative—so while I love playing White Suit is one. There are so many
with untraditional shapes and proportions to elements that make this suit shine, but for
create something powerful and unexpected, me it’s the oversize cut and the white
it’s most important to remain authentic to stitching that really make it special. The
the person. A suit communicates strength, oversize shape of the jacket allows it to be
power and an unspoken confidence. worn several ways—as a dress with a great
SHIONA TURINI ON sandal from Amina Muaddi or Brother
ESSENCE: Can you talk about the benefits of Vellies; or with slim pants, as she did for the
How to Add Tailoring
tailoring and how it enhances a wardrobe? NY premiere; or with a wide-leg pant.
and Suiting to TURINI: It can completely transform a look. Another great red-carpet look is Issa
Your Personal Style When pieces such as suiting are properly Rae on the cover of Vanity Fair in a black Saint
tailored, they can enhance and accentuate Laurent suit. My first job in fashion was at
different parts of the body. For example, I’m Yves Saint Laurent. One of the reasons I fell in
curvy, so I always go a size up in a pant and love with the company was that they were
F R O M T O P: P H O T O G R A P H Y B Y N I S H A J O H N Y A N D J O N AT H A N J A C O B S; J O N K O PA L O F F/G E T T Y I M A G E S; N I S H A J O H N Y A N D J O N AT H A N J A C O B S (2).
take it in at the waist. Clothing will always fall the first high-fashion luxury brand to dress
better when it is tailored to your body, and women in tuxedos and suits. Saint Laurent
small tweaks can really make a difference. executes tailoring very well, so a classic black
blazer or tuxedo jacket that you can wear a
range of ways is worth the investment. I love
pairing a jacket with the unexpected, like a
high-waisted bike short or a long tuxedo skirt.
Janice Duncan at the 93rd Academy
Awards in a black Valentino suit is another
favorite moment. I am always looking for
pieces that have a unique element. The
tuxedo jacket could also be considered a
cape, but it still has the lines of a great-fitting
jacket. Pairing it with a sheer, textured
top, like an Aisling Camps modern sheer
turtleneck, makes the look even more
unexpected and interesting.
Uzo Aduba
Then there’s Uzo Aduba at the Lightyear
premiere in a Sergio Hudson suit. Suiting
in bold, bright colors is always a yes for me!
Wright
The jacket could be worn on its own, with a
dazzles bodysuit and jeans. The pieces work well in
at every
event. any season, making it easy to incorporate
them into your wardrobe.
“A suit
communicates
strength,
power and
an unspoken
confidence.”
—Turini

“be myself
I can laugh and
“
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ONE WITH LUNG CANCER
How Two Sisters Rallied Together to Navigate a Devastating Lung Cancer Diagnosis
COURTESY OF DEBORAH AND JENNIFER
In 2007, sisters Deborah and Jennifer watched their mother pass away a F.C.C.P., Morehouse School of Medicine. “Knowing this may help
little more than two years after her initial lung cancer diagnosis. Losing doctors develop personalized treatment plans to specifically target
a loved one is hardu and the sisters weren’t prepared to face yet that type of cancer.”²⁴
another lung cancer diagnosis in 2020 – this time for Deborah.
After receiving her Niomarker testing results, DeNorah learned that
After her cough was misdiagnosed twice, DeNorah, a she had the KRAS G12C mutation, one of the most
retired educator from Morganton, North Carolina, learned common mutations in NSCLC, occurring in aNout
she had advanced non-small cell lung cancer (NSCLC). 1 in 8 (13%) NSCLC patients in western countries.5
Upon hearing the news, Jennifer immediately stepped in Despite KRAS testing Neing recommended Ny
as her sister’s health advocate. DeNorah says Jennifer has guidelines from professional societies as part of a
Neen the “angel on her shoulder” throughout her journey Nroad comprehensive panel or targeted testing in
Ny “researching her cancer and communicating with her NSCLC, not all individuals Nenefit equitaNly from these
doctors.” That research led Jennifer to discover a physician advances.⁶⁷⁸⁹ In NSCLC, eligiNle Black patients are less
who could perform DeNorah’s surgery. But at a follow-up likely to receive Niomarker testing compared to White
CT scan post-surgery and chemotherapy, DeNorah’s team patients, which can potentially contriNute to widening
of oncologists recommended Niomarker testing after existing disparities in cancer diagnosis and treatment.⁹¹⁰
discovering that the cancer had spread to the other lung.
Despite those statistics, Dr. Flenaugh is optimistic in a
Biomarker testing identifies a patient’s specific tumor more equitaNle future since “we’re seeing Niomarker
makeup to help doctors understand what’s driving the testing Neing conducted at the time of diagnosis for
growth of the cancer.¹² It can Ne done through a tissue Niopsy or a Nlood advanced or metastatic NSCLC patients, which is how it should Ne
test.³ “Each person’s cancer has a unique pattern of biomarkers.² utilized Necause it guides treatment plan decisions.”¹¹ In his opinion,
Biomarker testing may show mutations in the cancer’s cells that can people need to know that “at the time of diagnosisu patientsu
help doctors understand what is influencing the cancer to grow and caregiversu and advocates should be empowered and encouraged
spreadu”² explains Interventional Pulmonologist Eric Flenaughu M.D.u to ask about the availability of biomarker testing.”
To learn more about KRAS 212C in NSCLC and for additional information
on comprehensive biomarker testing talk to your doctor. You can also
find resources by visiting krasg12candme.com.
References
1. Pennell NA, et al. Am Soc Clin Oncol Educ Book. 2019;39:531-532.
2. Ahmadzada T, et al. J Clin Med. 2018;)(6):153.
3. Gregg JP, et al. Transl Lung Cancer Res. 2019;8:291.
4. Barlesi F, et al. Lancet. 2016;38):1415-1426.
5. Data on File, Amgen; 2020.
6. Kalemkerian GP, et. al. J Clin Oncol. 2018;36:5.
). Robert NJ, et al. J Clin Oncol. 2021;39(15):9004.
*Individual results may vary.
8. Hann KEJ, et al. BMC Public Health. 201);1):503.
KRAS, Kirsten rat sarcoma viral oncogene homolog
9. Bruno DS, et al. J Clin Oncol. 2021;39(15):9005.
©2022 Amgen Inc. All rights reserved.
10. Stein JN, et al. J Thorac Dis. 2021;13(6):3))2-3800.
USA-510-81249
11. Hess LM, et al. J Thorac Oncol Clin Res Rep. 2022;3(6):100336.
Walker honors his late
girlfriend Breonna Taylor.
Black Love
Matters
Breonna Taylor was more than a hashtag to
Kenneth Walker. She was his love and best friend
By
Bry’onna Mention and Melissa Noel
T
he month of June was special to Walker says Breonna, at 26, had big little Jordans; it was supposed to be for our
Breonna Taylor and Kenneth Walker. plans for her career, working two jobs to pay kid—so we always had them sitting on the
With her birthday on the 5th and his for nursing school. They had big plans for a dresser, like we had a kid already,” he says,
on the 10th, the couple enjoyed an almost future together, too. “We were definitely describing the red and white Retro 12s that
week-long celebration together every year. talking about getting married and having a he still holds close.
They loved live music and going to concerts, baby and stuff, just planning on being a These items are now keepsakes from a
J O N C H E R R Y/G E T T Y I M A G E S
a good party and taking long walks— power couple, making a whole lot of money future he and Breonna had planned—but
anything, Walker says, to be in each other’s together,” he says. will never have. Everything changed on
presence and have a good time. “Our love His mother was going to give him his March 13, 2020.
was based on friendship—that’s where it all grandmother’s ring for Breonna when he The night before had started out as an
started,” Walker says, sharing that they first was ready to propose. And a close friend of ordinary evening for the duo in Louisville,
met online in 2012. “Friendship was how our the two had also given them a special gift. Kentucky. They had a date night, went out to
love became what it was.” “Our godson’s mom gave us some of his dinner at Texas Roadhouse, came home »
CULTURE JAN–FEB 2023 ESSENCE.COM 29

Kenneth Walker never
got a chance to say
goodbye to Breonna.
“
I will keep her name alive. that’s happening— weight of Breonna’s memories.
still to this day.” “I guess it just feels like I was put in this
I will continue to make sure In the two position for a reason,” he reflects. “I grew up
people know I’m still here, years since the with two sisters and a mom, so I’ve always
traumatic event, been a protector of Black women. Who
and that I’m gonna keep Walker, now 30, better to speak than somebody who’s lived
has been at the through this, and continues to say her name.”
fighting for Breonna.” forefront of pro- Walker was initially charged with
tests, participated assault and attempted murder after the raid.
and played a game of UNO! They planned in social justice panels and done countless Those charges were permanently dropped
on watching the movie Freedom Riders, but interviews alongside Breonna’s family. He in March 2021. That month, Walker filed
they soon dozed off, not knowing things says he feels as if it’s all necessary, as they a civil lawsuit against the city and a number
would never be the same after the early continue fighting for justice. of the officers involved in the shooting,
morning hours of March 13. Historically, Black women have fought requesting punitive and compensatory
Shortly after midnight, Louisville police for justice and carried on the legacies of damages in both state and federal court. In
officers executing a search warrant used a Black men: Mamie Till-Mobley for her son November 2022, the Louisville Metro Police
battering ram to enter Breonna’s apartment. Emmett Till; Betty Shabazz and Coretta Department (LMPD) settled with Walker for
Walker, a licensed gun holder, said he Scott King for their husbands, Malcolm X $2 million.
thought someone was trying to break in. He and Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.; and Erica In August 2022, the Justice
fired a single shot, hitting an officer in the Garner died fighting for her father, Eric Department charged four current and
leg. The officers returned fire with a barrage Garner. Women like Sybrina Fulton, Lucy former LMPD officers with federal crimes
of bullets that struck and killed Breonna. McBath and Lesley McSpadden—mothers related to Breonna’s death, including
“When this happened, I lost everything,” of Trayvon Martin, Jordan Davis and Mike federal civil rights offenses, unlawful
says Walker. Brown—have forged bonds from shared conspiracies and use of excessive force.
He was immediately taken into tragedy. Known as “Mothers of the One of the officers, Kelly Goodlett,
custody and charged with the attempted Movement,” the latter form a heartbroken pleaded guilty to falsifying the warrant
murder of a police officer. He would later club of moms of slain Black boys. It’s a circle that led to Breonna’s death—and to later
L E I G H V O G E L /G E T T Y I M A G E S
learn of his girlfriend’s death from a in which none of them sought membership conspiring with another detective to
newscast while in jail. Walker never got a that now binds them for life. create a cover story—when her death
chance to say goodbye, because he was Here, Walker stands alone. There isn’t a gained national attention.
locked up on the day of Breonna’s funeral. “Fathers, Husbands or Boyfriends of the “I will keep her name alive,” Walker
“I’ve been having to fight just to live,” Movement.” As the only surviving witness to vows. “I will continue to make sure people
Walker says now. “ I haven’t even had enough Breonna’s killing, Walker shoulders an know I’m still here, and that I’m gonna keep
time to slow down and process everything enormous responsibility for carrying the fighting for Breonna.”
30 ESSENCE.COM JAN–FEB 2023 CULTURE

©2020 Tyson Foods, Inc.
Through her art, the revolutionary Joan Tarika
“Matilaba” Lewis was instrumental in helping
to frame the political realities faced by the
Black Panther Party.

JOAN OF
ART aware that she was the Party’s first woman member—and the first
Joan Tarika Lewis, an artist and the
recruit, period. The distinction was brought to her attention during
first woman to join the Black Panther a conference at University of California, Berkeley, when Seale
Party, both illustrated and embodied acknowledged Lewis for her groundbreaking work as a political
educator and illustrator. “I came in with a couple of other people, late,
the iconography of the movement
and we sat in the last row,” Lewis says of the two-day event. She
By describes how Seale pointed her out and made an announcement:
Skylar Mitchell and Brooklyn White
“There’s Matilaba, the first female recruit of the Black Panther
Party,” he told the audience.
Lewis was raised by descendants of
Visuals can be a powerful tool in political Black pioneers who had escaped to
praxis. The content, design and color of abolitionist Massachusetts, and eventually
images express an artist’s understanding of traveled west, settling in San Francisco in
the world; how it is and how it can be. And 1849. Her paternal great-grandfather,
when creative work is applied to community Edward West Parker, managed commerce
building, this vision is intensified. Joan initiatives in a Virginia chapter of the
Tarika Lewis—artist, revolutionary and the Colored Conventions Movement. This
first woman to join the Black Panther foundational racial justice body was formed
Party—deeply understood the visual after enslaved, indentured and freed Blacks
possibilities as she used art as an organized for education and political
organizing tool. access in the event of the government’s
“I just offered [Bobby Seale, collapse and the outbreak of a Civil War.
cofounder of the Black Panther Party] That war, of course, eventually did occur.
some drawings I had for interpreting what Lewis’s ancestors were keenly aware
was being said in the meetings,” Lewis of the importance of self-reliance. They
says of her role as an illustrator of the had to be, if they were to survive the
movement. In addition to working with fluctuating fortunes of a country that was
Minister of Culture Emory Douglas to intent on disenfranchising Black people.
shape the visual identity of the group, she That resilient ethos traveled with both
P O R T R A I T A N D I L L U S T R AT I O N S, C O U R T E S Y O F J O A N TA R I K A L E W I S
Lewis helped
wrote articles for the Black Panther shape the sides of the artist’s family through their
visual identity
newspaper. “We were typing with two of the Party. exodus north, then west.
fingers, okay?” she says with a laugh. She Lewis was born in Oakland in 1950.
also came into her own as a political By then, her relatives had established
cartoonist after she became a member of the Party. multiplegenerations of African-American community leadership,
Lewis vividly recalls her young adulthood through the lens of her including as members of the Buffalo Soldiers and as Black physicians
time with the Party, during which she collaborated with peers-turned- and homeowners. Lewis recalls growing up surrounded by Black-
comrades to define the organization’s political identity. She remembers owned medical offices, stores and boxing gyms like the one where her
how in 1967, an innocent day at San Francisco’s Playland-at-the-Beach father trained as a lightweight champion. The neighborhood was close-
amusement park turned into a nightmare. Lewis had been enjoying an knit, and children like Lewis were protected by a circle of fictive kin.
afternoon of fun with Bonnie and June Pointer of the Pointer Sisters. “After “Oakland, especially West Oakland, was a real family community,”
we got off the roller coaster, these two grown men had this kid—and they she says of the sense of safety the city had at that time. “Everyone
sucker-punched this little skinny kid,” Lewis says. “He must’ve been knew each other. Everyone’s doors were open—we never locked our
about 13 years old. The men turned out to be policemen.” The experience doors. We never had bars on our windows. I had a dozen mothers up
was for Lewis a “rude awakening,” an act of brutality that provoked her to and down the street. And if a kid ever got in trouble, your mother knew
take action. “Shortly after, I joined the Black Panther Party,” she states. about it before you got home.”
Taking the name Tarika Matilaba Lewis, she was not initially To some extent, the familial nature of Black Oakland served »

Women like Lewis
were the strength
and spirit of the Party,
often without due
recognition of their efforts.”
as a basis for the Black Panther Party’s internal structure. Especially

in its earliest years, when founding members and affiliates worked
together to refine their political leanings, the communal framework
lent itself to members’ intense reliance on one another. However, this
dynamic soon gave way to a gendered division of roles.
The Party developed an ideal amalgamated image of the “Black
Revolutionary Woman”—one who selectively elevated Black men above
their gender liberation. Women were called upon to occupy a myriad of
organizing spheres simultaneously, focusing on domestic, ideological
and spiritual priorities. This promotion of women, as accessory members
who supported the more militant profile of men in the Party, made them
susceptible to physical abuse, exploitation and discrimination within the
organization. On top of being revolutionaries in their own lives, women
like Lewis were asked to be the strength and spirit of the Party, often
without due recognition of their efforts and sacrifice.
In Kathleen Neal Cleaver’s 1998 essay “Women, Power, and
Revolution,” the former communication secretary for the Party Minister. In later years, Douglas publicly acknowledged the influence of
suggested that the gender roles detracted from the organization’s women’s labor in his illustrative work. “The women depicted in my
larger purpose. “It seems to me that part of the genesis of the gender artwork,” Douglas told The New York Times, “are a reflection of the Party.
question, and this is only an opinion, lies in the way it deflects Women went to jail and were in leadership roles. Women started
attention from confronting the revolutionary critique our organization chapters and branches of the Black Panther Party as well. When we used
made of the larger society, and turns it inward to look at what type of to read some of the stories, you would see women in the Vietnam and
dynamics and social conflicts characterized the organization,” she Palestine struggles and in the African liberation movement. Women
wrote. While acknowledging that discussions around gender, sexism were an integral part of those movements, so all that played into how I
and women’s liberation within the Party could be explosive, Lewis has expressed them in my own artwork.”
never been afraid of a little fire. When asked whether she had found Lewis’s own artistic archive, coupled with her recollections of
the Black Panther Party to be misogynistic or a safe space for women Party leadership, offers an important counter-narrative to the often
to lead, create and thrive, she responded, “All of the above.” male-dominated imagery of Black Power. Her legacy extends beyond
As the Party’s influence grew, different factions took root. the illustrations, however, as her artistic expression in various mediums
“Initially, it was small, we all knew each other,” Lewis says. “Lil’ Bobby challenges colonial, White supremacist and capitalist structures.
[Hutton] went to Oakland Tech High School. The first women recruits Long after her official involvement in the Party, Lewis used her art
also went to Tech.” to reframe intersectional hegemonies that impacted the lives of Black
Chauvinistic outlooks became more entrenched due to an influx and oppressed people, doing murals in her native California. “I work
of new members. With shifts at the top—Seale, Huey P. Newton and with a lot of ethnic communities, and I do a lot of graphic designs,” she
Elaine Brown all led the organization at various points—came recruits says. “I did a T-shirt for Black-Asian unity that’s still circulating in San
who didn’t have the same sense of camaraderie that had influenced Francisco and the Bay Area.” Additionally, for the next two years, she
the Party’s early outlook. “People came in droves—people we didn’t will exhibit paintings at San Francisco’s Chinese Historical Society of
know, people who had other agendas, people who had other baggage, America Museum, supporting efforts to promote a strong alliance
who came into the Party, and also came with certain attitudes toward between the Asian and Black communities.
women,” Lewis says. She left the Black Panther Party soon after. More recently, Lewis has also built a career as a music educator:
In the early 1970s, the Party leadership tried to address and correct She teaches beginner’s violin in Oakland. But through all of her creative
the sexist overtones that existed within the various chapters. Seale pursuits, the visual possibilities of art will always have a special place
worked to better acknowledge women leaders like Lewis, carrying out in her heart. “It’s an amazing tool of expression,” she says. “I use it now
an imperative that was being actively reinforced by Douglas as Cultural to show where we’ve been and where to go.”

R
JUNE – JULY 0
More information on EssenceFestival.com
#ESSENCEFEST
r&b IS NOT
By
Taylor Crumpton
Photography by
Kevin Amato DEAD Coco Jones, Muni
Long, Kaash Paige:
three dynamic women
in the music industry
who are revitalizing
the new age
Over thirty years ago, Mary J. Blige was
crowned the Queen of Hip-Hop Soul. The
title, bestowed on her by record executive
S T Y L I N G B Y I C O N B I L L I N G S L E Y. H A I R B Y H A C H O O J O H N S O N. M A K E U P B Y D I A N A S H I N AT A-F R A M E
Andre Harrell, was the byproduct of the
A G E N C Y. P R O D U C T I O N B Y T H E M O R R I S O N G R O U P, W I T H T H A N K S T O L’E R M I TA G E B E V E R LY H I L L S.
positive reception to her studio album, What’s
the 411? At the time of the album’s release,
Entertainment Weekly described it as “one of
the most accomplished fusions of soul values
and hip-hop to date.”
Executive-produced by Sean “Puffy”
Combs, the album incorporated elements of
hip-hop’s beats and narrative-driven lyricism.
The meshing of genres extended beyond
sound and into fashion. Combs hired Misa
Hylton, now a style icon, to curate and
produce looks to accentuate Blige’s “fly girl”
personality and attitude. Through her creative
partnerships with Combs and Hylton, Blige
introduced not only a new sound to R&B, but
a new type of singer.
In the late 1990s and early 2000s, R&B
was at the top of music charts. The new
millennium expanded opportunities for
musicians to connect with their fans online,
through early social media networking sites
and fan pages. However, as the Internet
began to connect listeners to genres outside
Coco Jones is originally of their locale, preferences in the mid to late
from Columbia, South
Carolina. 2000s started to orient toward European

Muni Long is originally
from Vero Beach,
Florida.
S T Y L I N G B Y J A S O N R E M B E R T. H A I R B Y C U R T I S P H I L L I P S. M A K E U P B Y S C O T T O S B O U R N E J R U S I N G PAT M C G R AT H
A N D H U D A B E A U T Y. P R O D U C T I O N B Y T H E M O R R I S O N G R O U P, W I T H T H A N K S T O L’E R M I TA G E B E V E R LY H I L L S.
electronic music and dance-pop. This shift —Nostalgia, Ultra and House of Balloons—
resulted in the prioritization of electro-pop ushered R&B into the 2010s. Instead of using
and dance-pop over R&B, which led to the gospel as a leading influence, this type of R&B
category’s dismissal from the mainstream. pulled together elements of alternative, indie
R&B’s transition to the underground and rock. Although the projects could be
afforded an opportunity for the genre to considered R&B, they reflected the sound of
reinvent itself. Between 2011 to 2012, Frank a Black kid who came of age on the Internet.
Ocean and The Weeknd released their debut For that generation, “labeling”—whether in
mixtapes online. The musical projects terms of sexual orientation and gender »

expression or placing their music in one storytelling. For a period of time, R&B was one of the few
specific group—felt like a confine instead of safe spaces where Black women could comfortably
an umbrella under which to build community. disclose their trials and tribulations as well as their
As with Blige, Ocean and The Weeknd breakthroughs. In R&B, singers became the conduit for
pushed R&B into another phase of evolution. channeling personal journeys and establishing a
Their efforts created a new entry point for relationship between listeners and the artist.
singers to establish and develop themselves, Coco Jones found in R&B a medium to tell her own
without the influence of the radio and music stories, in comparison to the characters she plays on the
industry. silver screen. “Storytelling with my music is different than
“The hit is you going in a closet—in the on-screen, because on-screen it’s not about me at all. It’s
studio, in your room—going wherever to really about making the character come to life. And so
make a song that you love and a song that I will sometimes create backstories that are not mine—
you personally like to listen to,” says Kaash they’re what I would feel would fit the character, so that I
Paige. “Love Songs,” Paige’s breakout can present a very authentic version of this character,”
single—which went viral on TikTok in 2019, she says. “But with my music, it’s all about me. It’s all
then amassed millions of streams on about how I feel that day.”
SoundCloud and Spotify—is a testament to What Didn’t I Tell You, her debut EP, is the compilation
her word. Before she signed to Def Jam, Paige of untold stories from a time when Jones didn’t know how
was an independent artist uploading original to be herself. “In my past there were so many scripts and
R&B songs to SoundCloud. “Love Songs” was so many prompts and so many strategic routes that me
one of them. being authentic with myself, through music, has helped
S i n c e t h e n , t h e 2 2-ye a r- o l d h a s me to learn more about myself.”
collaborated with Alicia Keys, 6lack, Don Kaash Paige is
Toliver, Isaiah Rashad, Moneybagg Yo, Lil Tjay, originally from Dallas.
Tinashe and Travis Scott. These experiences

have contributed to the maturation of her
sound on Soundtrack To My Life, the singer’s
sophomore album. She excitedly says of the
album, “It’s R&B, but it takes you on a journey.
It goes from R&B to turn-up car-y type, and
then goes right back down to it.”
For those unfamiliar with Paige’s stage
presence, she rages with the rock star spirit of
Lenny Kravitz but has the soft voice of an
angel. As an adolescent, she was drawn to
alternative and rock music—particularly the
way they made her feel. At her performances,
Paige serves as a conductor. Through her
voice, she lulls the audience into the intimate
feelings of her songs, followed by a quick
transition into her stage-diving personality.
For Paige, whether the sensation arises from
jumping into a mosh pit or selecting beats in
a recording session, it has put her in a place
where people are taking notes.
She lists Ciara’s Goodies and The
P R O D U C T I O N: T H E M O R R I S O N G R O U P
W e e k n d ’s Tr i l o g y a s e x a m p l e s o f
contemporary R&B albums that make you
feel, arguing: “R&B is finding more. R&B is
recreating the genre.... It’s a feeling. It’s
rhythm. Whatever you want to do, it’s getting
your groove. Everybody just create their own
world and allow everybody to be a part of it.”
The ability to create one feeling through
music is symbolic of R&B’s relationship with

“
We’re lacking compassion these
days. Everybody’s so desensi-
tized, and I think deep down, we
want to be loved.... I think this is a
great opportunity for R&B to kind of
sneak in there and just take over.”
—Muni Long
For the majority of Jones’s life she has experienced pressure to that brought great impact because it had “feeling.”
be someone else, in order to adhere to what Hollywood considers a “I think people, we’re lacking compassion these days. Everybody’s
successful Black woman. Now she has decided to center herself and so desensitized, and I think deep down, we want to be loved—we want to
her own stories, in television and music. feel,” Long says. “And I think as long as I continue to give them that, and
There are three basic questions in help people escape from the darkness of reality, the more love that we’re
storytelling: Who writes the stories? able to inject on the other side, right now, as an artist—I think this is a
Who benefits from the story? Who is great opportunity for R&B to kind of sneak in there and just take over.”
missing from the stories? In Muni Long’s Her breakthrough single, “Hrs and Hrs,” provided the perfect
case, she is the author and beneficiary. opening for couples to showcase their affectionate love, after an
For over a decade, Long penned award- intense period of global lockdown due to COVID-19. The song also
winning songs for pop’s biggest stars served as an introduction to Long, the storyteller she always wanted to
and went by a different name, but they be. Long makes the music that she wants to hear, instead of being
were not the stories she wanted to tell. encouraged to write music that is popular.
“We definitely went through a The success of “Hrs and Hrs” helped Long negotiate a partnership
period of ‘too cool.’ You know what I’m with Def Jam, allowing her to focus on the creation of music instead of
saying? I’m too cool for that. I’m too cool serving as her own fashion stylist, hairstylist, makeup artist and more.
to love,” she reflects. “Everybody was She describes this state as a “matter of me being consistent with the
trying to rap-sing at a certain point, and same integrity of music, the same level of music, where people love it.
that’s okay. No judgment, because I was Every time I put something out, it’s going to have to have that same
liking a lot of that stuff too—but I think integrity and the same impact. I can only pray and hope that I can do
it’s time to move on,” she adds. that over and over. That’s all I’m focused on.”
Long aspired to make songs that All this to say, R&B is alive and well. It’s just not the same R&B your
evoke emotions, like Method Man and parents and grandparents grew up with. Inherently, music is
Blige’s “You’re All I Need.” She mentions omnipresent and ever-changing, which means the singers who create
artists of the era like Combs, known back and produce songs change alongside it. The new generation is not like
then as Puff Daddy, and Faith Evans, who the one before, but they should be welcomed as having the same
understood the power of a simple song relevance and earning the same respect afforded to Blige in 1992.

Sheryl Lee Ralph wears a
Christian Siriano dress,
Genevive Jewelry earrings and
her own rings.
SUPPORTING A QUEEN
Sheryl Lee Ralph sits down with Jackée Harry for a conversation on their
Hollywood trajectories—and the Emmy win that ties them together
Photography by Shaniqwa Jarvis
Styling by Jason Rembert

A S S I S TA N T S: K E I T H K L E I N ER, JI M M Y K I M, Z AC H C A LL A H A N. DIG I TA L T EC H N IC I A N: J O R DA N Z U P PA. S T Y L I S T A S S I S TA N T: W ILTO N W H I T E. S E T D E S IG N A S S I S TA N T S: DI EG O LO P E Z, G A B R I ELL A R U I Z. P R O D U C T IO N: T H E M O R R I S O N G R O U P.
On September 20, 1987, Jackée Harry became the first African- Harry: How did that make you feel?
H A I R: M OI R A F R A Z I E R, U S I N G A R IO M C O LL EC T IO N. M A K E U P: M IL A T H O M A S AT T H E L I P B A R. N A IL S: T E M E K A JA C K S O N. U S I N G D A ILY C H A R M E AT A-F R A M E A G E N C Y. S E T D E S IG N: W I N S T O N S T U DIO S. TA ILO R: T R AV I S T H I. P H O T O
American woman to receive a Primetime Emmy Award for Ralph: Oh my gosh. So tiny. And I remember having to ask him,
Outstanding Supporting Actress in a Comedy Series. Her win, for “Natural for whom? This is me.” But what was so interesting is that
her role as Sandra Clark on 227, cracked the door open for Black even later on, when the pilot came up—I think it was Sanford
P R O D U C T IO N M A N A G E R: E V E VA N DY K E. P R O D U C T IO N C O O R DI N AT O R: G A B R I EL B R U C E. P R O D U C T IO N A S S I S TA N T S: F R A N K B E N KO V IC, A LO N D R É P EO P L E S. S P EC I A L T H A N K S T O C O V I N A C E N T E R F O R P E R F O R M I N G A R T S.
female comedic actresses—but it would be 35 years before another Arms—the producer told me I just wasn’t Black enough, and I was
would walk through it and onto the Emmy stage to accept that same like, “Wow.”
award. On September 12, 2022, Sheryl Lee Ralph was that person.
“When they called your name for your Emmy, I said, ‘Wow, this Harry: And what does that mean?
is bigger than I thought,’” Harry says, in conversation with Ralph for Ralph: Exactly. I wasn’t Black enough for you.
the Abbott Elementary star’s Of The ESSENCE digital cover. “Being
the first is hard. Being the second is harder, but it’s fabulous.” Harry: I was told I wasn’t Black enough in terms of my skin color. When
“It’s so amazing,” Ralph responds. they tell you that, it makes you so angry. And then it makes you so sad.
Ralph and Harry were both born in 1956 and bred in New York, Ralph: Years later I saw that producer—he’s since passed—and he
and they both worked on Broadway early in their careers. Though said, “I am very sorry.” And I said, “It’s all right.” I let him apologize, and
their paths diverged after that, their journeys through Hollywood I was happy that he knew better now.
have been similar, as entertainers coming up in an era when
opportunities for Black women were more rare. Yet, as they both
share, one thing’s for sure about show business: You can’t live in “ What people don’t know is
the past.
it is easy to disappear in the
Jackée Harry: You and I are sitting here, and we’re over 40. industry. After you turn 40,
Sheryl Lee Ralph: Over 50. Welcome, 60. Hey!
they don’t see you anymore.”
Harry: But we’re both still working. How rare is that? Speak on it, girl.
Ralph: Very, very. What people don’t know is it is easy to disappear —Sheryl Lee Ralph
in the industry. After you turn 40, people just don’t see you anymore.
Harry: I remember you from Dreamgirls, like everybody does. The
Harry: I didn’t think I’d be working today. I thought I’d be in San Diego, original Deena Jones. But I must say, I felt that you guys didn’t get
retired in my condo—somewhere near the beach, with young boys. your due from the play to the movie. I know that’s quite a broad
Well, not too young. Maybe 50, 51. statement, but you never got your flowers.
Ralph: I always said to myself I was going to be Betty White, Black. Ralph: You know something, Jackée? You and I have been around
long enough to realize that everything comes around the way it is
Harry: Why? supposed to come around. Yes, they ignored us when they made
Ralph: Oh, because Jackée, I love what I do. And what I do has given me the movie. Whatever that choice was, it hurt my feelings, because
an incredible platform to talk to people and address things like health we literally created Dreamgirls. Tom Eyen handpicked us, put us
issues, well-being, all of that. And to create a space that is good for all together—and we improvised and put those moments together
everybody. When I hit the room, I want there to be an explosion of joy. I that became that groundbreaking musical. And when they chose
want people to be happy, feel seen and know that things are possible. to go to Hollywood and make the movie, to act like we weren’t a
part of it—there were so many things they could have done. They
Harry: You always had your career planned out, didn’t you? could have added us, but the choice was made not to. And God
Ralph: Yes. I always knew that there would be younger people behind and Goddess know why. I’m just like, “It’s okay.” Because we are
me, and I always knew in my mind that I would have children. And I moving forward.
wanted to have the kind of career that my children, my family, my
community, the people that loved me could look at and say, “That’s our Harry: It’s show business. You can’t live in the past. But don’t get
Sheryl Lee Ralph.” I embraced the label “role model” because there amnesia. That’s what I say.
were never enough of them on TV for you and me. Ralph: That right there. Make it be lipstick and lashes under the
bridge, baby.
Harry: We both played popular moms on television in the ’90s. You Harry: Forever.
starred alongside Brandy in Moesha, which I love.
Ralph: That was a great time for me. I remember walking into the Ralph: A great lesson is find your joy and hold onto it. Don’t let
room and seeing this young Black girl with her braids, just doing anybody take it away from you.
her thing. And I remember thinking of when I was her age, dreaming Harry: Joy can’t be given, and it can’t be taken away once you have it.
about coming into the industry, and being a teenager and wearing
my braids—and having producers say things like, “It’s a very EDITOR’S NOTE: Quotes have been condensed and edited for space. Watch Sheryl
unnatural hairstyle. Can’t you just find something more natural?” Lee Ralph and Jackée Harry’s Of The ESSENCE conversation in full at ESSENCE.com.

Michelle Obama is back
with an inspiring
follow-up to her 2018
memoir.
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur

adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor
incididunt ut labore et dolore magna
aliqua.

WE SHALL
OVERCOME
In her latest book, The Light We Carry, our forever
First Lady Michelle Obama shares how she persevered
through fear—and how we can do the same
By
Malaika Jabali
Photography by
Miller Mobley
M
ichelle Obama was writing her debut memoir, to release their words into the world.” While she doesn’t
Becoming, and thought, What on earth am I hesitate to share her vulnerability, she doesn’t linger on it
doing? It’s hard to imagine the beloved First either. “Fear is powerful in that it can keep us safe,” she
Lady ever being unsure of herself—but that doubt says, “but it can also keep us stuck. And if we don’t learn
resurfaced as she prepared to launch her latest title, The how to decode when fear is saving us and when it’s holding
Light We Carry: Overcoming in Uncertain Times. It was a us back, then we lose out on whatever opportunities and
week before the book’s publication date when we spoke, possibilities lie on the other side of that fear.” It’s an insight
and she still didn’t feel at ease about the endeavor. “I could that holds lessons for how we deal with each other in our
just be at home, comfortable, not saying anything,” she daily lives.
reflected. But here she was. On the day we talk, the elephant in the room is, well, a
A lot has changed since Mrs. Obama published her GOP one. It’s Election Day 2022, and predictions of a
autobiographical best-seller in late 2018. A little more than Republican “red wave” have captured the nation’s
a year after its release, the entire world was shaken by a attention. Stoking fears and inflaming differences have
global pandemic. The Light We Carry speaks to the fear been key to the party’s strategy—ultimately, it fails.
and uncertainty that followed in its wake, yet the assurance Though neither of us says it explicitly, The Light We
in Mrs. Obama’s voice makes you feel as if anything can be Carry serves as a torch showing us a way out of the dark,
overcome. ugly politics that have engulfed our nation. Through
Overcoming is a lesson she learned early on. At 4 anecdotes in each chapter of the book, Mrs. Obama shares
years old, Mrs. Obama was selected to participate in a the tools that she and others in her trusted circle use to find
holiday recital. During the rehearsal, she noticed an the light at the end of our challenges.
oversize plush turtle perched next to the spot where she “This is a good time for us all to put our tools on the
was supposed to perform. Despite her pounding heart, table and start figuring out how do we cope in these times,”
she approached the stage and found that the turtle wasn’t she says. “We don’t have the right or the bandwidth to quit,
as big and intimidating as she thought. so we have to figure out how we are going to sustain
For her, the turtle came to symbolize fear of the ourselves and each other. We’ve got to develop the
unknown, even in our adult lives. I ask about the other resilience of our parents and our grandparents—now
“turtles” in her life. “This book is one,” she states over the more than ever.” And, she points out, those fearsome
phone. “But that fear comes up anytime anyone is about turtles become so much smaller when we do it together.

TRAVERSING
H A I R (F E R N A N D E Z): FA AT E M A H A M P E Y. M A K E U P (F E R N A N D E Z A N D W A N G A): K I M B E R LY S T E W A R D. P R O D U C T I O N
TRIUMPH
A S S I S TA N T: J U L I U S - J O H N S W A I N. L O C AT I O N: C O R E P O W E R Y O G A, A P P L E VA L L E Y M I N N E S O TA.
CEO Caroline Wanga explores Black women as chief executive officers

of home, culture and community, and focuses on helping every
Black woman recognize the “chief” that already exists within her—by
introducing the chiefs who live among us.
Photography by
Nina Robinson

BREATHE. passion for equity, not just inclusion, in the The mission she owns daily requires
Whether you’re facing trials or triumphs, workplace and marketplace. This is reflected in her to ensure she’s functioning in as close to
your state of mind can always benefit from the her efforts to ensure that Target’s team of over optimal health as possible. A few years ago she
power of breathing. The practice of breathing is 400,000 reflects the representation of its discovered yoga—its origins and its benefits—
core to the practice of yoga—which has African millions of guests. The core of who Kiera and committed to practicing it and teaching
continental origins and is at the center of how Fe r n a n d ez i s a l i g n s to her role at the it as well. Here, she shares how the practice of
one of the highest-ranking Black women in a corporation—where she has additional yoga not only keeps her connected to people,
$100 billion Fortune 50 company does well responsibility as a founding member of the purpose and peace, but also fuels her
with her wellness. retailer’s Racial Equity Action and Change continued ascension and success in the many
As the Chief Diversity and Inclusion Officer committee, focusing on equity for Black team roles she plays outside her professional life—
and Senior Vice President Talent and Change at members, guests and communities. She hasn’t as a mother, aunt, daughter, cousin, wife
the Target Corporation, Kiera Fernandez has a just led the efforts; she has had incredible results. and friend.
“When you get into these jobs, the very first

thing that falls by the wayside is your activity.
You have to eat and sleep, but everything in the
middle is negotiable, in theory.”
Caroline Wanga: Who is Kiera Fernandez? Fernandez: My whole life I wanted to be a lawyer. I can
Kiera Fernandez: From the day I came into this space, I remember watching L.A. Law, with female lawyers,
was breathed into with deep life and affirmation that gave and they were ballers. There was a really clear moment,
me confidence and courage. I grew up with both sets of though. My mom and most of her siblings, went to
my grandparents, [and they] had very different Arizona State. We went to the Rose Bowl one year, and
backgrounds. On my mom’s side, my grandfather is from Arizona was playing Michigan. They were playing
Mississippi and my grandmother from Louisiana—so I the game, and I saw them run out with their helmets,
had the very traditional Southern, African-American and I thought that was awesome, and I was very excited
experience from the Jim Crow era, where they had to make about it—and that’s how I picked Michigan. And
hard choices and decisions about how they were going to when I got there, I got a cultural immersion, being 45
be raised and how to raise their family. On my dad’s side, minutes from Detroit and around other people with
my grandmother is from Wisconsin, and my grandfather different experiences.
was born and raised in Hawaii. All these experiences I’m on spring break one year, and I’m with my cousin
create the sum total of the tapestry in which I was raised. Marcus at a job fair, and Target was there. I’m walking
by and I say to the recruiter, “I’m sorry, I’m not interested
Wanga: Out of all your identities, there’s something in being a cashier.” And he said, “Well, do you have five
different about how you feel about your Black identity minutes for me to tell you about the experience?” And
and how it plays a role in the way you show up. Why? he pulls out the magic ingredient, and it’s a paper that’s
Fernandez: We’re sitting in a yoga studio. When my got a career path on it. And so I’m looking at this very
grandmother Annie was my age, she wouldn’t be able sequential progress, and I’m like, Wow, that’s amazing. So
to walk in that door. This wasn’t designed for her. That’s we leave the job fair and go to the closest Target possible.
not my other grandmother’s experience. I know who I see And I walk in with a different set of eyes. I think to myself,
in the mirror every day. I see a Black woman who was I think I could work here. I think I could do this. The person
raised by a Black woman, who was raised by a Black that was on campus ended up being one of my store
woman. There are some people that have a multiracial directors—that’s the way the universe works in tandem.
background that, based on their optics, can make a
choice. I know what I look like, and I know where I’m Wanga: One of the things that I know about you is that
centered and where I’m from. part of what helps you thrive is being healthy and well.
You sit in a very high-ranking position in a very stressful
Wanga: What happens after childhood, in terms of job. You sit in the types of roles that have killed people.
where you choose to go to school; and how do you end Literally. From heart attacks, strokes and so on. You’re the
up in Minnesota at Target? second-highest ranking Black woman in your »

corporation—and you have a full, active family, a full, active
faith life and a full, active marriage. How do you stay healthy?
Fernandez: It’s a learned behavior. Because my mom, my sister
and my dad were very active and athletes, I played sports. In my
mind, I’ve always felt better when I was physical. But when you
get into these jobs, the very first thing that falls by the wayside
is your activity. You have to eat and sleep, but everything in the
middle is negotiable, in theory. I remember a point where I said,
“I’m so tired right now, and I don’t even know what to do.” So I
decided I’ve got to figure out a routine.
My really good friend Courtney and my assistant now,
Julie, were both telling me I should try yoga. And I said, “No
thanks, not interested.” I had a perception of what yoga was.
I said, it’s bad for your hair. It’s too slow. I’m an athlete and I
need a real workout. And Julie said, “I have a real workout for
you—go to this class.” I finally said, Okay, I’ll try it. And I did,
and loved it.
I went and got all of these yoga books. And I discovered:
What most Black women or people of color don’t know about
yoga is that the practice is rooted in Asia
and deeply rooted in Africa. Like so many
other things, the perception of yoga has “What most Black women or people
been appropriated. So if that’s what’s
perpetuated for the masses, why would I
of color don’t know about yoga is
ever believe that I ever belonged there? that the practice is rooted in Asia and
And I discovered it was the exact opposite. deeply rooted in Africa. Like so
Wanga: What happened throughout your
many other things, the perception
career that got you here? of yoga has been appropriated.”
Fernandez: This is actually where the
real lessons came in. My career pathway
to being a store team leader was fast, but the rest didn’t go
how I thought it would. I expected that everything was going
to be the same way, but that was not the case. Moving to
headquarters was supposed to be an accelerant. I thought,
I’m going to go learn how a corporation works, and then I’m
going to come back into the field and do all these big jobs.
And that’s not what happened. The path to where I am sitting
right now had a whole bunch of traps and trick doors.
When I got into my new experience at the corporate
location, I literally felt like I was working for a new company.
The nomenclature was different, the acronyms were
different—I felt like I was working for a new company, because
I was. Everything about the experience was radically different.
All this incredible onboarding that I had gotten when I worked
in stores was not what I got when I stepped into this new role.
You had to figure things out on your own. And I didn’t have
anyone who could help me figure things out. My leader was
great, and he was doing the best he could, but it was still really
hard to make connections with people. I felt like an outsider. I
remember I called my grandfather, who is my book of wisdom,
and I told him, “It might be time for me to go somewhere else.”
He asked, “Do you feel like you’re doing the right thing?” And I
replied, “I do.” So he goes, “Well, if you feel like you’re doing the
right thing, why are you going to leave?” And here I am today.

E NOU GH TO SH A RE
DOE S N’T M E A N YOU
Have to
More kicks of f lavor. More smiling snackers.
®/©2022 Tyson Foods, Inc.

Lori Harvey wears Ferragamo red
cotton gabardine jeans covered
with crystals, $9,000, ferragamo
.com, and a Bvlgari ring. Shoes,
stylist’s own.

Written by Photography by Styling by
Tre’vell Anderson Emmanuel Sanchez Yashua Simmons
Monsalve
The It girl is unattached,

unbothered and unconcerned
with what anyone else thinks
I
t’s easy to assume you know Lori Harvey. Her name’s always in the headlines
and on the tip of everybody’s tongue—most often in regard to the men she’s said
to have dated. It’s easy, almost expected, to think you’ve got her figured out; that
you know what the 26-year-old daughter of a noted fashionista and King of
Comedy is all about. We can thank, or blame, the celebrity gossip and news eco-
system for that. And up to this point, Harvey’s been fairly silent about all that’s come
through the grapevine.
“Because I’ve been so quiet this whole time, the Internet has created narratives for
me,” she says, with clarity, on a recent winter evening in Los Angeles. “People are just
taking whatever bits of gossip and rumors that they have, and then creating that as a
truth. In reality, the majority of the time it’s so far from the truth. So, it can be tough.”
Harvey’s saving grace has been a piece of wisdom from her mother: “For those who
know and love you, no answer is needed. But for those who don’t, no answer will do.”
“That’s where the strong sense of self comes into play,” Harvey explains. “Just
understanding and really knowing who I am, and not letting the outside opinions or
noise affect me internally.” »

On Harvey: a Laquan Smith
Spring Summer 2023 top, not
for purchase, vintage Celine
jeans and Bvlgari bracelet
$30,000, bulgari.com.

She is, quite literally, unconcerned with the rumor
mill—and instead has directed her attention inward.
Because, to borrow RuPaul’s famous phrase, “If you
can’t love yourself, how the hell you gonna love some-
body else?” The result, Harvey says matter-of-factly, is
that “this moment is about me.”
We’re seated on adjoining pleather couches in the
dressing room of a South Los Angeles studio. Harvey’s
legs are crisscross-applesauced. She’s calm and all
smiles, having spent the day shooting her first
ESSENCE cover. For the “Black Love” issue. With no
man on her arm. She’s proud, and palpably so. “I feel
like it’s always been about me attached to something
or someone,” she says. “This time, it’s about me. Self-
love, self-care, self-reflection. I’m being a little selfish
right now. It’s my time.”
Harvey was born in Memphis on January 13, 1997,
when Toni Braxton’s “Un-Break My Heart” ruled the
charts. By age 3, she’d already booked her first model-
ing gig, for a kids’ clothing boutique called Cotton Tails.
The ad ran in a local newspaper. In 2005, her mother,
Marjorie, reconnected with comedian Steve Harvey,
whom she’d first met at a Memphis comedy club a
decade before Lori was born. The couple married in
2007 and blended their families; Steve adopted Lori
and her two siblings, creating a family, seven children
strong. As Marjorie and Steve’s individual careers and
level of visibility grew—hers as a fashion blogger,
designer and socialite, his as a “self-help” author and
game- and talk-show host—their kids were largely out
of the spotlight. It’s said they had as normal a child-
hood as one can, considering the circumstances.
Young Harvey first fell in love with fashion when, as a
preteen, she started attending major runway shows
with her mom. Later, her passion became competitive
horse riding. She wanted to go to the Olympics and
was training to do so when, at 18, she tore her MCL and
suffered a serious back injury in a riding accident. with people and set it up, and I’ll just slap my name on it and go about my day. But I
Begrudgingly, she accepted that she’d likely never ride really wanted to learn the ins and outs of the business. I wanted to be very hands-on
competitively again and, with a face card that never with everything I was doing, and I wanted to make the mistakes, so that I could learn
declines, she returned to fashion and modeling. from them and really know how to be a businesswoman at the end of the day.”
About a year later, she walked her first major run- And she’s just getting started, with plans to branch out into television, digital
way show with Dolce & Gabbana, going on to star in a content, acting and producing. This is the other side of Harvey that many don’t see
number of their campaigns. Today, Harvey is an indus- or talk about. Her drive to be more than a pretty face, or the daughter of a celebrity
try It girl with almost five million followers on Insta- couple, is overshadowed by an obsession with her love life. Over the years, more
gram, and she signed with IMG Models and WME last attention has been paid to who Harvey is dating, or not dating—a soccer player and
year. But she’s also a businesswoman, having launched an R&B star; a rapper and hip-hop mogul; that mogul’s son and People’s Sexiest Man
her skin care line, SKN by LH, in 2021—with no financial Alive. Many women, especially Black women, know this microscope all too well, par-
support from her parents. ticularly how it judges those with an apparently robust and active romantic life more
“That has arguably been one of the hardest things harshly than their male counterparts.
I’ve ever done in my life, but also one of the most “It can be tough at times, especially because I’m a super-private person,” Harvey
rewarding and fulfilling,” she says of SKN, “because admits. She doesn’t particularly care for her personal life to become gossip fodder or
this is the first thing that I’ve really been able to call my the latest news item, and she has tried to protect her privacy as much as possible. But
own, that I built from the ground up. It would’ve been people still talk. One social media discussion pitted Harvey against fictional Cosby
very easy for me to just ask my parents to connect me Show matriarch, Clair Huxtable, asserting that her assumed dating history makes »

Harvey less wifey material than the character and maturity,” she points out. “So I don’t think I
played by Phylicia Rashad from 1984 to 1992. would say I regret anything.”
The conversation centered on respectability, Recently, audio from comedian Mo’Nique’s
ultimately saying more about the (mostly) men 2007 special I Coulda Been Your Cellmate! has
contributing to the discourse than about Harvey surfaced in tens of thousands of social media
herself—or about any other woman or femme videos. The joke describes the Queen of
whose desirability gets filtered through cis- Comedy—who revealed she’d been divorced
gender and heterosexual male gazes. twice and was days away from marrying her
“I think a lot of times, people are project- third husband at the time of the film’s taping—
ing,” Harvey says about the online chatter. expressing her commitment to love. “Never give
“Typically, what I have found is when it’s guys up on love,” she says. “I’m a bitch that believes—
who feel that way, it’s because they know that if one ni**a don’t work, get another one. If that
they can’t meet you at your standards. Which ni**a don’t work, get another one. And if that
is okay, too. Everything ain’t for everybody. ni**a don’t work…get two ni**as!”
But what I would love for people to know is While on the surface the bit is about pur-
that I am a young woman just trying to figure suing love, but what it’s really about is being in
it out—but I’m trying to figure it out in the pub- constant pursuit of one’s own happiness. And
lic eye,” she adds. “That magnifies everything. even now, after 15 years, Mo’Nique taps into
It magnifies your mistakes. It magnifies the the attitude of a certain type of Black woman
ups and downs of just navigating your life and or femme. The type who puts themselves first,
figuring it out for yourself.” refusing to have their confidence tethered to
Harvey has been a public figure her entire speculation and hearsay. The type for whom
adult life thus far, and during her early twenties, settling for someone who doesn’t meet their
no less—a time of general self-exploration for needs is antithetical. The type that is
most people. But few of us have had to contend undaunted by the journey to love, because it
with the watchful eyes of millions studying our puts them most in touch with themselves and
every move. Yet Harvey has no regrets—and their desires. It’s bad bitchery by another name,
no shame. “Every decision that I have made has and Lori Harvey—whose own alleged relation-
got me to the place that I’m at in my life, as a ship journey is captured in at least one fan-
woman—and the mindset that I’m in, and the created social media video, with Mo’Nique’s
growth that I’ve made, and this level of clarity words as the score—is solidly in her »

Harvey is wearing a Tiffany &
Co. Elsa Peretti® snake
necklace in 18k gold, extra
large, $53,000, tiffany.com.

Harvey wears a Dior
dress and earrings, prices
upon request, available at Dior
boutiques nationwide.

Hair: Ray Christopher using Ray Christopher Co.
Luxury Clip-Ins
Makeup: Leah Darcey Pike at ICA
Nails: Chaun Legend using The GelBottle Inc. at
The Only Agency
Set Design: Jesse Hoffman
Set Design Assistants: Vivian Hicks, Deondre Davis,
Jesse Clark
Digitech: Mikayla Jean Miller
Photographer’s Assistants: Jupiter Jones, Elliot
Smith-Hastie, Walker Lewis, Mikayla Jean Miller
Stylist’s Assistants: Julian Mack, Stef Contreras
Nail Assistant: Misheelt Khosbayar
Tailor: Tatiana Sali-Souleiman
Production Manager: Perris Cavalier
Production Coordinators: Alaura Wong, Zhane
Santisteban
Production Assistants: Frankie Benkovic, Alani
Waters
Shot at Studios 60 With Thanks to L’Ermitage Beverly
Hills & Heirloom LA
Production: The Morrison Group

bad-bitch era. “It’s not about being arrogant or about feeling like I’m too
good, or too this or too that,” she clarifies. “I know my worth, and I know
my value. I’m not going to compromise that, or settle, or accept anything
I know my worth, and
less than what I know I deserve.” I know my value. I’m
It might not seem like it at first, but such a positioning is actually
a radical form of love. It’s one that challenges and bucks up against not going to compromise
how we’ve been told Black women should move through the world
romantically, if not also professionally and socially. She’s also decen-
that, or settle, or accept
tering of a type of love rooted in a patriarchal version of Black wom- anything less than what I
anhood. Harvey knows that she is the prize. And she’s part of a
generational shift-in-progress, in which many young, Black women know I deserve.”
in the public eye are making their own new rules. They’re claiming as
their own a personhood that is as complex and nuanced as the totality
of human experience. As many Black women before them have done. for others. It doesn’t have to be framed as an egotistical or mindful
There’s Cardi and Megan and Latto, whose raps unapologetically unwillingness to prioritize the needs and desires of others. In a nec-
champion female sexuality. There’s Lizzo, who as a fat, Black woman essary rewriting of the rules, being most concerned with one’s own
boldly resists anti-fatness, and therefore anti-Blackness—triumphantly happiness isn’t negative in the slightest.
and defiantly loving the skin she’s in, and twerking, ass out and Sasha It often is the greatest act of love.
Flute in hand, every chance she gets. “Put yourself first,” Harvey sums up. “Love yourself. Put yourself
And then there’s Harvey, who by the very nature of embracing on the highest pedestal, and don’t ever come down.”
the trial and error of life, despite what public
perception may come, models a definition of
love many won’t understand. In some ways,
she’s even rejected the “Act like a lady, think like
a man” mantra from her father’s New York Times
bestseller, which became a Will Packer movie in
2012. Rather, she’s acting like a boss and think-
ing like one, too.
But that doesn’t mean she doesn’t want
love. In fact, when asked about what Black love
looks like to her, she speaks longingly of her
grandparents’ marriage of over 65 years. She
describes a love that smells like peaches and
cream or honey; a love that feels like fresh air or
a warm hug, or like listening to your favorite song.
“My experience has taught me that I need
somebody who respects me—somebody who
understands and respects my standards and my
boundaries and is a supportive, God-fearing man,
family-oriented, and makes me feel at peace,” she
says. “That’s where I’m at in my life right now. I’m
not compromising my peace and happiness for
anything or anybody. And so if I see any signs of
that happening, I’m like, ‘Got to go!’”
She’s also praying, she says, “to be the best
version of myself, so that one day, when I am ready,
I will be the woman that I need to be for that union On Harvey: a Chanel embroidered calfskin
to be successful. But right now, I’m just praying to top, $550, embroidered calfskin shorts,
$5,500, and necklace (as a belt), $300, all at
better my life for myself—growing my businesses select Chanel boutiques nationwide; Wolford
and brand, growing my relationship with God, tights, similar style available at wolfordshop.
growing into a stronger, better woman every day.” com; Panthère de Cartier watch, and Cartier
High Jewelry earrings, $5,000, all available at
Lori Harvey is being selfish. But not neces- Cartier boutiques nationwide.
sarily in a traditional sense. Being selfish
doesn’t have to involve a lack of consideration

WELL
Power-suiting is the decades-old concept of using tailoring to
enhance the femme form—creating an armor of sleekness, ferocity
and power. Iconic suit warriors, from Joan Clayton to Grace Jones,
paved the way. But here’s how to incorporate suiting into any
wardrobe, aesthetic, vibe and occasion today
SUITED By
Shelton Boyd-Griffith
Photography by
Philip-Daniel Ducasse
Styling by
Solange Franklin

Model on left is wearing
a Luar belted trench, luar
.world, and Esor Marie sandals,
esormarie.com. Model on
right is wearing a Luar blazer
»
and shorts, luar.world.

RACY

Opposite page: Model on
left is wearing a Gucci blazer
and pants, gucci.com and
Theophilio top, theophilio
.com. Model on right is wearing
a Theophilio blazer, top and
skirt, theophilio.com.
This page: Model on left is

wearing a No Sesso skirt and
pants, nosesso.la, Selina King
earrings, selinaking.com and
Alexander McQueen gloves,
alexandermcqueen.com.
Bustier, stylist’s own. Model on
right is wearing a Valentino top
and skirt, available at Valentino
boutiques.
The allure of suiting and tailoring is that it can be worn in

a myriad of ways. In a more oversize fit, pair it with a
sequined blouse or a bib tuxedo shirt; or reimagine it as
a crop top paired with a black maxi skirt. »

This page: Model on left is
wearing a Proenza Schouler
top, proenzaschouler.com,
Lionne skirt, lionneclothing
.com, No Sesso bra, nosesso
.com for information, Bliss
Lau body chain, blisslau
.com and Khiry earrings, khiry
a Diotima blazer and shorts,
shopjudith.com for information,
Khaite top, khaite.com
and Third Crown earrings,
thirdcrown.com.
Opposite page: Model

is wearing Alexander
McQueen blazer, top,
trousers and sunglasses,
alexandermcqueen.com
and Alan Crocetti earrings,
alancrocetti.com.

CHIC
There is no definitive way that suiting needs to be

styled, so feel free to play with proportion and scale. Experiment
with a cropped jacket and high-waisted trousers, or
pair a cardigan with hot pants. »

CLASSIC
There’s nothing more classically
stylish than a navy pinstripe. With
origins in banking, it’s a power combo
that signals you mean business. Wear
it as a full suit or try a deconstructed
iteration of the look.
Modeling, Nyagua Ruea at Women Management.
Hair, Mideyah Parker using Pattern Beauty at Bryant Artists.
Makeup, Mimi Quiquine using Maison Quiquine at She Likes Cutie.
Nails, Aja Walton using Essie at See Management.
Stylist’s Assistants, Ore Zaccheus, Chardonnay Taylor.
Photo Assistants, Mouhamadou Seck, Alex Demarco.
Tailor, Zunyda.
Casting, Shahriyar Ghobadpour at CVILIAN.
Production, The Morrison Group.

Model on left is wearing a Gucci
blazer and trousers, gucci
.com, HOME by Areeayl bracelet
(on left), homebyareeayl.com,
Third Crown bracelet (on right),
thirdcrown.com and Alan
Crocetti earrings, alancrocetti
a K.ngsley top and bottom,
k.ngsley.com, Proenza Schouler
socks, proenzaschouler.com and
Louis Vuitton shoes, louisvuitton
.com. Sweater, stylist’s own.

Z ACH BARRON
From jumping the broom to exchanging

wedding rings, we have imbued
traditional symbols of adoration
with special meaning.

LET ME COUNT
THE WAYS
In our culture, “Black love” is more than a slogan—it’s a way of life.
And how we express it has deeper roots than you might know
By
Dominique Fluker
JUMPING THE BROOM
A
mid economic turmoil, political unrest, public
health crises and general global strife, love— Black couples have been engaging in this custom at weddings since
especially Black love—is a grounding force. the 18th century. Tyler D. Parry, Ph.D., the author of Jumping the Broom:
Every time we express love, we honor The Surprising Multicultural Origins of a Black Wedding Ritual, noted
our ancestors who dared to love deeply and that our enslaved ancestors weren’t free to marry legally, so many
fearlessly. Even with the threat of being adopted the tradition of jumping the broom. As Parry shared in a 2022
forcibly separated from each other, and with the inability to establish New York Times article, this rite was once practiced by marginalized
comfortable homes, our people embraced one another, with the communities in Europe. It was later introduced to enslaved people in
singular faith that things wouldn’t always be so bleak. Their decision to America by White plantation owners.
make room for hope and warmth has grounded and sustained us. In The Journal for Southern Living, Patrick W. O’Neil includes a
I’ve experienced the full spectrum of Black love—from arranging chapter called “Bosses and Broomsticks: Ritual and Authority in
flowers with my grandmother in her backyard to riding with my father on Antebellum Slave Weddings,” which observes that most slave owners
his tandem bike in the afternoons to catching up with my mother on our used the broomstick to deem Black marriages transitory and
daily homegirl phone calls. I also know love’s more difficult side, as I unimportant—and to assert authority and dominance over enslaved
embarked on the merry-go-round of a romantic relationship that often households. But for us, jumping the broom signifies a new beginning;
left me riddled with despair. I’ve listened to a lot of Keyshia Cole and Toni sweeping out the old, if you will. It respects the families of each partner
Braxton. Two tracks, specifically—Keyshia’s “Shoulda Let You Go” and while acknowledging the holy union the newlyweds have undertaken.
Toni’s “I Love Me Some Him”—helped me navigate my emotions, heal Over the past several hundred years, the tradition has endured; it
and, later, self-soothe. After surviving the highs and lows of Black love, I is still a feature at Black American nuptials. After the newlyweds
know it intimately; and the familiarity deepens my appreciation. exchange vows and kiss, they hold hands and jump over a broom to seal
Now, make no mistake, it’s work. Lord, it’s work. Consistently their union. A family member can make the broom, or it may be an
choosing someone can get difficult, especially when egos come out to heirloom passed down through generations.
play. But that’s just the thing: It’s a choice. You wake up every day and My mother was the designated broom creator for jumping-the-
decide to love on your mate. Even though painful love may be a thing of broom rituals in our family. I’d watch her meticulously apply white and
the past, we can’t pretend like some days aren’t get-out-of-my-room- silver ribbon, custom-made satin bows and fabric to the broom handle.
and-hit-the-sofa type days, with a you-a-mess cherry on top. Still, we She would then adorn the broom’s base with dried lavender, pearls and
show up and try again, because the I-need-us days outweigh all. eucalyptus. It usually took her three days to decorate the broom. With
Aside from encompassing strength and resilience, our love can pride, she would deliver her creation to the bride and groom, hopeful
also be intentionally tender. Although Black love can be complicated their love and bond would be eternal. For Black families today, jumping
and nuanced, at its core it is joyful. Even in terrible times, it is luminous, the broom marks the leap of faith needed to embrace Black love fully.
forcing out the grim realities of being Black in America and bringing the
light. Today, as we honor the past and create space for the future, we PAYING FOR A FULL SET
count all the ways in which we continue the legacy of Black love. Black nail art can be traced back to 3000 B.C., with Queen Nefertiti »

painting her fingernails and toenails red to mark her royal status.
According to Nails: The Story of the Modern Manicure, some Egyptians
adorned their nail beds with artificial extensions made of ivory and
bone. These days, getting our nails done serves as a rite of passage to
womanhood. Every Black girl who has stepped into a nail salon
remembers the first time she went with her mother, grandmother or
auntie. Having the creative autonomy to select nail designs that are
true to you is liberating—each design encapsulates a specific cultural
aesthetic while accentuating Black women’s personalities.
But if our nails make a personal statement, that declaration can
be rather pricey. A full set of gel nails, for example, can easily go for
$50. So when someone pays for a complete set of nails for us, it
Full heart, full set.
demonstrates love—by honoring our culture and accepting our
creative choices and personhood.
WEDDING RINGS
We d d i n g r i n g s a re a n e m b l e m o f
devotion. The symbolism behind them “With modern soul food, we
has much to do with their circular shape,
w h i c h re p re s e n t s w h o l e n e s s a n d celebrate our foremothers’
timelessness. Circles have no beginning
or end and, like love, are limitless.
culinary creativity. Out of great
As with nail art, ancient Egyptians struggle has come wondrous
pioneered the wedding ring. They
believed the band represented eternal innovation. With each plate, we
life, love and, ultimately, a spiritual portal.
Thus they would exchange rings of love
deepen our love for one another.”
made of woven reeds or leather.
Today’s wedding ring symbolizes
the promise of love, growth and oneness. And for Black couples, it’s
also the beginning of a journey rich in African history. These days our
F R O M T O P: B R I A N A B A R T L E T T; A M Y A N A I Z P H O T O G R A P H Y. O P P O S I T E: Z U N L E E.
wedding rings are decorated with platinum, black bands and large,
colorful diamonds. And from canary yellow to Ruby Woo red to
powder blue, even engagement rings are now more modern in their
look. Our rings reflect our community’s current styles, economic
empowerment and singular passion.
COOKING SOUL FOOD

Soul food is a staple in Black households. We whip it up to celebrate
special occasions—or just to encourage togetherness among family
and friends. From collard greens and macaroni and cheese to candied
yams, cornbread and catfish, each dish proves that the way to
anyone’s heart is through their belly.
In his book Hog and Hominy: Soul Food from Africa to America,
Frederick Douglass Opie points out that our enslaved ancestors in the
South had to make do with the food provided, which influenced our
current eating traditions. The rations usually included discarded
meats or dairy products—nothing could be wasted. They decided to
take those scraps and create a phenomenon. With modern soul food,
we celebrate our foremothers’ culinary creativity. Out of great struggle
has come wondrous innovation. With each intentionally crafted plate Black love is not monolithic.
we fix, we deepen our love and respect for one another.

How do you and your partner show each other love?
Let us know by posting about it with the hashtag
#LetMeCountTheWaysESSENCE.

K A D A R R. S M A L L
PDA is an ongoing series about BIPOC

queer community normalizing displays of
affection in public and domestic spaces.
Photographer Kadar R, Small, who captured
this happy scene, explores tenderness and
intimacy within various relationships.

GREASING OF THE SCALP
Nature’s Blessings was the name of the hair pomade my mom used
on wash day every Sunday. It was emerald green and smelled like
a mixture of rosemary, sage and peppermint. After blow-drying
my hair, she would sit me in the kitchen, pull out a mustard-colored
rat-tail comb, part my hair into sections, and then grease my scalp.
This was a sacred ritual for us. Every week would be the same
routine. There was a sense of closeness and intimacy as my
mother applied the grease to my tender head and smoothed my
edges. It was a loving gesture, meant to nurture the health of my
hair. Many Black kids experienced the same custom growing up.
Without access to their usual herbal regimens, our enslaved
ancestors were forced to innovate new treatments that would
moisturize and protect their hair from harsh weather conditions,
fleas and parasites. Many of them used bacon grease on their
scalps. Centuries later, Madam CJ Walker created a pomade that
was a modernized version of the hair grease our ancestors had
invented. Her 20th century scalp-healing formula led to hair
grease developing its own identity and category—and generated
a market for a Black beauty boom.
Similar to braid take-downs, hair greasing, as it relates
to romantic love, can be artful and sexy. Your partner not only signs
up for an act of service but shows their willingness to see
and accept you in your most bare state. It’s an invitation to deeper
Libation ceremonies are a way to honor
connection through a private act of intimacy, one that can be erotic family and friends who have passed on.
even. Black women don’t play when it comes to our hair, and for In the midst of demonstrating a couple’s
love through a wedding, we are sure
us to trust our partners with helping to care for our tresses to remember those who are not here to
means everything. celebrate— especially when they’ve
profoundly impacted the couple’s lives.
LIBATION CEREMONY
Although wedding ceremonies are joyous,
they can also have an air of somber reflection. “Every week, it would
As partners celebrate their union, they also
honor deceased loved ones who passed away
be the same routine.
before the special day. Through a libation There was a sense of
ceremony, Black couples pour out a liquid as
an offering to a departed person’s spirit, deity closeness and intimacy
or soul.
The observance isn’t limited to weddings
as my mother applied
and romantic ceremonies. Spiritual-libation the grease to my tender
occasions are often held among close friends
to honor loved ones who have passed on. On head and smoothed
Tupac’s 1994 track “Pour Out a Little Liquor,” he
describes how he’s choosing to remember his
my edges. It was a loving
lost friends and family by performing this rite. gesture meant to nurture
This tradition exists not just in our
communities but globally. It is practiced in the health of my hair.
Africa, Israel, Greece, Rome, Asia and South
America, to name a few cultures that share in
Many Black kids
R ALSTONRSMITH
the ritual. As with all expressions of love in experienced the same

action, the libation ceremony is a call for uniting.
In this case, the deceased and the living unite custom growing up.”
again through love.

LOVE
Without
a LIMIT

Black trans and queer people navigate identity and
acceptance with living family—but how do queer and
trans people mourn their homophobic relatives? In
this op-ed, Ericka Hart explores how hard it is to lose a
loved one who never embraced your truth
or a Black person, grief nighttime prayer was so morbid. You just
F
is all too familiar. And for said it on cue.
a Black queer/trans/ Although religion was important to my
nonbinary person, it is immediate family, they weren’t super strict
intertwined in the very about it. It felt ritualistic—more like a habit
fabric of our existence. and a hope for connection, as opposed to a
We live in a country that does everything in necessity for salvation. Attending church felt
its power to render Black queer and trans like a practice passed down by the ancestors,
people invisible and obsolete. This inevitably without much explanation of why we needed
leads to mourning our queer and trans to dress up, attend, sing and then go to
friends and “chosen family” members—who Grandma’s house for dinner. Yet every
either no longer see existing on this plane as Sunday without fail we rushed out of the
an option or who cease to exist because house to make it to services on time.
someone made that fatal decision for them. For my mom church was definitely a
Legislators have taken time out of their day space she went to worship God, but it was
to create laws penalizing students and also an outlet for her and her kids to stunt in a
teachers for even saying the word gay in new outfit. I think it also fulfilled her childhood
classrooms, increasing barriers for trans dream of being a famous vocalist. Church
youth who seek to access gender-affirming became a place where she experienced
care and using barbaric medical tests to worship and celebration. My dad, on the
delegitimize trans athletes. Unfortunately, other hand, went to church when he wanted
legislation is not the only realm where to or when my mom made it clear that we
agreement has formed to say that our should show up together as a family—on
existence is wrong and should be corrected. major holidays, and so on. He always made a
It starts closer to home, quite literally. point that he didn’t need to be in church to
Family members are often our first point honor God. He was raised Pentecostal, which
of contact with homophobia, queerphobia required that he be in church four or five days
and/or transphobia; and this can come up of the week. Continuing that practice was not
well before we even have the language to something he was interested in, and when
name our own identities. We learn very given the choice of whether or not to attend
quickly what is valued as “normal”—through church, he chose not to.
gender corrections like “Act like a lady” or For his sister Judith Snowden—my Aunt
“Boys don’t cry.” We hear it through jokes, Judy—on the other hand, church was a
conversations about popular culture and necessary pathway to her final resting place:
even gossip about other family members. For heaven. Aunt Judy was barely 5' 2", thin, light-
me, these messages came through mostly skinned, with hair that was clearly greased
in a religious context. Christianity played a with blue magic, as the bunted ends sat
prominent role in my life growing up. We faithfully on the back of her neck as if they’d
went to church every Sunday and prayed been glued in place. Her laugh reverberated
PHOTOGR APH BY JEREMY GREIR
before every meal, and every night before with unwavering conviction about every-
bed we recited: “Now I lay me down to sleep, thing, but especially about God. She never
I pray the Lord my soul to keep. And if I die wore pants—always a skirt or dress, well
before I wake, I pray the Lord my soul to take.” below her knees, with nothing form-fitting
I don’t say this prayer anymore and haven’t and certainly not showing her cleavage or
since I was about 7, but it’s still cemented in even her collarbone. She was a part of every
my memory. In my Black household, you church board imaginable and would invite us
absolutely did not question why our to her church at every opportunity. »

hospital to pray over her in the same way she
came to our house. Maybe we were more
similar than I realized; maybe the idea that
opposites attract in romantic relationships
“Respect is
has some truth in familial relationships as
well. Whatever it was, I felt held and loved
by my Aunt Judy—until I realized our
relationship was contingent upon my not
a complex
identifying as queer, or, as she saw it, yielding
to “the temptation of the devil.”
I kept my queerness from my immediate
family until I was 22. I introduced partners as
subject when
my friends, lying for fear my family would not
accept me. At this time, I had no plans of
coming out to my Aunt Judy. Unfortunately,
one of my cousins outed me to her after
you do not see

seeing me share about my sexual identity on
social media. Suddenly, I rarely heard from
Aunt Judy—beyond a Bible sent to me in the
mail, bookmarked and pointing to the exact
someone’s
scripture that allegedly claimed that who I
was “choosing” to be was wrong. She sent
me testimonies from people like Donnie
McClurkin, who talked about being saved
truth as real.”
from being gay. (I guess one of my favorite
songs by him, “We Fall Down,” was about a
lot more than I’d realized.) Sometimes Aunt
Judy would send me emails saying she
would pray for me to change—and making
suggestions on which churches I should join
in the area. We didn’t speak for 10 years. It
I didn’t realize the contrast between the was a conscious choice on my part, as it felt
way we practiced Christianity and how Aunt counterintuitive to have people in my life
Judy did until later in life—but it eventually constantly working against my existence
became evident that religion looked quite when the world around me was doing
different for her than it did for us. My mom overtime in that department.
would say, “Your Aunt Judy is coming over! No one wants to be around someone
Y’all getting anointed tonight.” Aunt Judy who is not accepting of who they are. Queer
would commute an hour from Baltimore City, and trans people are often left to overexplain
in her minivan filled with Bibles and basic tenets of respect, as respect seems to
pamphlets explaining the scripture, just to be a complex subject when you do not see
pray over my little brother and me. She spoke someone’s truth as real. Over the course of
in tongues throughout what felt like a solid 10 years, I wished my Aunt Judy would call to
30- to 45-minute prayer. We rarely heard check on me. When I was diagnosed with
people speak in tongues, so it always took breast cancer, she sent well-wishes and
something to be mature and not laugh. We prayers through my dad. When I met my
knew the prayer was coming to an end when partner, I spoke highly of Aunt Judy; and he
she placed olive oil on our foreheads; by the recommended that although our once-close
time it was about to drip down our chins, she relationship fell apart, it might be worth
would say “Amen.” reaching out to see what could be salvaged.
To this day, I am not entirely sure why my I reached out to my Aunt Judy, and she
Aunt Judy and I had a pretty tight bond. We acted as if no time had passed and she was
were essentially polar opposites. Maybe it just waiting for me to call. I didn’t attempt to
was the way Judy cared for my mom as she bring up why I hadn’t spoken to her, as she
battled breast cancer, coming to every clearly knew. After that, I carried on a

relationship with her for my own sake—not
hiding my queerness by any means, but
setting the boundary that I was not going to
try convincing her that I was worthy of love.
She still found ways to be homophobic,
outright denying that I am queer and saying
only a cold “hello” when she met my partner
for the first time—the same person who had
encouraged me to reconnect.
When my aunt became sick, she didn’t
tell anyone but her brothers and daughter
until long after she had received the
diagnosis. She kept her illness a secret—
claiming that Jesus makes the final call for
our lives, not man. Although our relationship
hadn’t been the best, I still made the three-
hour drive from New York City to Baltimore to
spend time with her. We laughed and teased
each other like we always had, but there was
also a guaranteed debate about my sexual
identity. She later told my dad that she didn’t
want anyone to know what she was dealing
with healthwise, as she didn’t want anyone to
treat her differently. After wondering what we
had in common, I found it both fascinating
and heartbreaking that we shared the desire
to keep an aspect of ourselves and our lives
secret, out of fear of relationships changing.
Black queer and trans people are quite
frankly some of the most forgiving people on
the planet; it’s a miracle that we are still
connected to love, when all odds are stacked
against us. I respected Aunt Judy’s bodily
autonomy all the way up to the day she
passed, although the same consideration
was never given to me. It wasn’t easy for me to
choose a relationship with my Aunt Judy, but
some part of me was willing to put myself in
emotional harm’s way to preserve our
connection. When she died, I didn’t know
what to feel. How are queer and trans people
PHOTOGR APH BY A ARON BURDEN COURTESY OF UNSPLASH
supposed to mourn their homophobic family

members? Does the grief process begin
when they don’t accept us? Do we continue to
protect them even in death? I don’t have the
answers to these questions, but I will continue
to ruminate on them as I cherish all the good
memories we shared. Aunt Judy always
ended her texts to me with GET READY FOR
THE RAPTURE, in all caps. I hope that in her
transition, she discovered there was really no
need for me to prepare—that God is love and
does not command me to change any aspect
of my life. The truth is, I will always love my
Aunt Judy, although she did not love all of me.

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The Realities
of a Recession
By
Jasmine Browley
Illustrations by
Rich Chance
For months, analysts have waffled back

and forth about the possibility of an
American recession following the
economic tumult caused by COVID-19.
Now, there’s no more question of “if,”
it’s “when,” and a large number of Black
Americans are woefully ill-prepared.
THRIVE & POWER JAN–FEB 2023 ESSENCE.COM 81

As Mark Twain said, “History never repeats after the states’ shelter-in-place mandates
itself, but it does often rhyme.” This is have been lifted, they are still struggling.
Entrepreneur particularly true of the disproportionate racial Although some steps—such as the
Cedric Nash slant of every economic downturn the U.S.
has experienced. In the years immediately
proposed forgiveness of a portion of student
loan debt—have been taken by the Biden
encourages following the American Civil War, a recession administration to relieve the strain of
caused panic across the country—but it economic inequity as we near another
people to take affected Black Americans most severely. recession, it has been proven time and time
a hard look at This isn’t surprising, given that we have faced
systemic oppression from the time the nation
again that the government alone is not
going to save us.
their finances— was founded. Although enslaved people Daryn Dodson—a former Stanford
gained legal independence with the signing Business School Dean’s Management board
and find ways of the Emancipation Proclamation in 1863, member, and managing partner at the asset
to protect the loss of free labor drove the South into a
downturn. For years after, Black people
management firm Illumen Capital—regularly
examines how systemic racism impacts
themselves worked as sharecroppers for White Black financial security, particularly during
plantation owners for little or no wages— sweeping economic crises. “Generally
against the which helped create the vast racial wealth speaking, during the subprime lending crisis,
looming disparity we see today.
Following the first World War, few were
the racial wealth disparity grew throughout
the country,” Dodson points out, “and the net
recession. safe from the economic devastation of the worth of Black Americans went down
Great Depression in the 1930s—but no one massively. A lot of this was because of the
“We really suffered more than Black workers, who were systematic stripping away of home-buying
have to buckle already relegated to menial, low-paying jobs.
The hard times further exacerbated their
equity. And a lot of what I study is the way
that even when Black companies and Black
down and poor treatment in the workforce, as Black entrepreneurs and Black fund managers are
Americans saw their wages cut. The Black outperforming, systemic biases push back
cut back all community experienced the highest against them and leave money on the table.
unnecessary unemployment rate of that time.
Fast forward to the recession of 2001,
So whether it’s the government or the private
sector, I think the notion that no one is
spending,” he the eight-month economic slump coming to save us is true.”
prompted in part by the Y2K scare. White Despite this sobering assertion, Cedric
advises. He unemployment rose from 3.5 percent in Nash, an entrepreneur who has built a
also suggests 2000 to a high of 5.2 percent in 2003. During
that period, Black unemployment rates
multimillion-dollar business portfolio, says
there’s hope. He points out that although
that people soared from an already high 7.6 percent to many analysts project that a 2023 recession
10.8 percent. And just five years later, during is 100 percent likely, he agrees with their
explore creative the Great Recession of 2008, Black people predictions that it will be mild in comparison
ways to generate once again had the highest unemployment
rate, at 10.1 percent, compared with 7.6
to those of the past. “What’s really
interesting is that in hindsight, some of the
passive income, percent for Latinx groups, 5.2 percent for recessions are actually shorter than what
White people and 4.0 percent for Asian- they felt like,” says Nash. “For example, the
adding that Americans. The year before, the Black 2008 Great Recession only lasted about
safeguarding unemployment rate had been an already
high 8.3 percent, which was more than twice
18 months technically—but it felt like it went
on forever, right? And the same thing with
your financial that of Whites. the whole COVID situation.”
The pendulum has swung in much But Nash also cautions that even with
future “can be the same direction for more than a decade, forecasts indicating this slowdown will be
done.” and now we’re staring at yet another
economic crisis following the COVID-19
softer than previous ones, Black Americans
should safeguard themselves. “A recession
pandemic. It has been well-documented is still a recession,” says Nash. “And
that Black businesses suffered the most companies still will lay people off and cut
during the lockdowns; and more than a year back on their spending, which has an
82 ESSENCE.COM JAN–FEB 2023 THRIVE & POWER

impact on small businesses as well as on
African-American people.” He notes that
despite warnings, Black consumers currently
seem to be engaged in a delayed-spending
trend, in which individuals splurge on items
and experiences they feel they missed out on
during the COVID-19 lockdown.
“What’s also really interesting is that
our community has really kind of doubled
down on luxury spending, traveling, buying
luxury items,” Nash continues. “A perfect
indication is how Bernard Arnault, the owner
of the luxury-goods company LVMH, grew
his wealth to over $100 billion during the
pandemic. During that time, African-
American spending reached $1.6 trillion, but
our net worth dropped by about 14 percent.”
He says that as we approach the
coming decline, Black Americans, even
those who are doing well financially, should
be careful not to allow their “spending to get
the best of them.”
Brittany Applegate, who ran her own
advertising consultancy and résumé-writing
agency full-time before the pandemic,
returned to the corporate workforce in early
2019 to shore up her finances. She couldn’t be
more relieved. “Although I own two
businesses,” she says, “at the time I wasn’t
generating enough on my own to sustain
everything, so I chose not to ignore any
LinkedIn job notifications coming my way.”
Nash encourages people to take a hard
look at their finances, much like Applegate
did, and find ways to protect themselves
against the looming recession. “We really
have to buckle down and cut back all
unnecessary spending,” he advises. He also
suggests that people explore creative ways
to generate passive income.
“We’re in a world where there’s a lot
of opportunity to freelance—whether it’s
doing hair, or helping small businesses with
their computers, or maybe you’re a teacher
who can tutor kids who are in need of
special assistance,” he says, adding that
safeguarding your financial future “can be
done.” But though it’s imperative that we
stay cognizant of the economic downturn
ahead, one thing is sure: History has shown
very clearly that Black people are equipped
to fight nearly any challenge that comes
our way.

Locals dance the night away
at a bonfire on the beach in
Costa Rica.
An expat family enjoys the

beach in Puerto Viejo.
Surf the Jungle owner and

instructor Misael Brown, with peer
Darshan South, helped Aishah White
conquer her fear of the ocean.

WORTH
In early 2021, Aishah White, SVP of Media and Strategic
Development at Warner Records, took a vacation to
Puerto Viejo de Talamanca, Costa Rica. She was
searching for peace for her mind, body and soul. She
THE
believed that the stress brought on by her hectic work
schedule in Los Angeles, the policies of Donald Trump
and the various racial tensions they created were factors
that could have contributed to her suffering a life-
TRIP
threatening brain hemorrhage in 2020.
The killing of George Floyd made things harder. In
its wake, White and many other music-industry
heavyweights drove efforts to ensure equality and
equity for Black artists in music. For White, devising
After a rare condition almost took her initiatives while processing the trauma of the killing was
life, a voyage to Costa Rica sent music an extremely heavy task, especially when paired with
exec Aishah White on a healing journey the effort to help her preteen daughter understand
what was happening in the world. Still, White kept
By
pushing. “I was trying to be everything for everyone,”
Jessica Herndon
Photography by she remembers. “I wasn’t taking the time to see what I
Ocean Morisset needed and to give myself grace, love and care.”
While on a retreat in Sedona, Arizona, in December
2019, White came down with an awful migraine after a
hike. Since migraines were rare for her, she figured the
altitude had caused the pain. A few hours after taking
Aleve, she felt fine. But the next day, the migraine kicked
up again—and the pain was ten times worse. “It was to
the point where it was blinding me,” recalls White. “I
couldn’t see. My whole body was shaking, and I was
sweating. My head felt like it was going to explode.”
The pain lasted for hours. “I was screaming,” she
recalls. “I had stripped out of my clothes, and I was like,
God if you’re going to take me, take me now, because I
can’t take it.” Away at a remote location, White didn’t have
access to immediate medical attention. But with the help
of her cousins, who put wet towels over her eyes to try to
calm her symptoms, she felt the throbbing pain in her
head start to ease up a few hours later.
Upon returning home to L.A., White underwent
craniosacral therapy to help relieve compression of the
bones in the head. The bodywork offered some relief.
But not long after the CST session, her pain started to
flare up again, and she went to the E.R. “They did an
MRI—and kept me there because they saw a bleed,” she
says. A week later, she was told she was lucky to be alive
after suffering from a rare condition called reversible
cerebral vasoconstriction syndrome, caused by the
sudden constriction of the vessels that supply the brain
with blood.
She was connected to specialists at UCLA, who
suggested she take blood thinners. But she was told
there was no way to ensure this type of bleeding wouldn’t
happen again and that there is no known cause of RCVS.
“For me, that wasn’t enough,” says the 41-year-old. “The
only thing I thought of when I was in that hospital bed was
my daughter and not being able to be there for her. »

Aishah White enjoying the
warm, healing water at Cocles
Beach, Puerto Viejo, Costa
Rica.
“The only thing I thought of when I was

in that hospital bed was my daughter and
not being able to be there for her.”
I want to see her get married, have kids, get old. So, I started to I was able to home in on what I needed to do for myself—which
do a deep dive into self-healing and neuro research.” was pursuing a combination of physical, mental and emotional
White became moved by the “Heal your body with your wellness.” An initial step was reevaluating her diet. She visited
mind” ideology of Joe Dispenza, who has a doctor of Juice For Life, a Puerto Viejo smoothie and juice bar, where she
chiropractic degree. “He talked about environmental risk, and was guided through a cleanse by herbalist Joseph Hodgson,
factors that play into this, and being able to get in a place of whose motto is “Let food be your medicine.” Hodgson custom-
meditation that is healing and renewing to your body and brain,” made juices for White, using local goods like spinach,
she says. Launching into a self-care plan, she put more focus on bitterroot, sarsaparilla and sea moss. “He cleaned my blood
her meditation practice. Then something came to her. She and body with his food and positive energy,” says White, who
remembered a three-week-long trip to Costa Rica with her adds that his spirit was emblematic of the wider Puerto Viejo
daughter the previous year. She recalled how free she had felt community. “The people from there treat you like family,” she
there, how she’d been warmly embraced by the people, and how says. “They’re so warm, giving and loving. My family’s from
she was pulled in by the harmonious beach and jungle, feeling Jamaica, and the Caribbean culture is very prevalent there. It
an intense connection to nature. “My spirit was like, You need to felt familiar. They took me in.”
go back to where you were and how you felt there,” she says. While in Costa Rica, White conquered her fear of the ocean,
“That’s what you need to feel right now.” learning to swim—and surf!—with the help of local professional
White returned to Costa Rica in January 2021 and stayed surfer and Surf the Jungle owner Misael Brown. “The water and
for six weeks. “Going back took away outside distractions, and waves—there’s such a connection with nature and a healing

Simone White, a Black
in Punta Uva to host others looking for a
American transplant, respite. “It’s a grounding place where you can
created @StayCasaMona
to host other travelers feel God all the time, regardless of your beliefs.”
seeking serenity. In 2014, Davia Shannon moved to Costa
Rica from L.A., after being constantly passed
over for promotions while working in finance.
After moving to Puerto Viejo, Shannon says,
she felt “safe, protected, loved, cherished and
appreciated—I’d never felt that before.” The
owner of Life-A-Holic Costa Rica, a company
dedicated to helping Black expats relocate to
Costa Rica, Shannon says that because of her
move, she c an provide her kids with
generational wealth. “In Costa Rica, I was able
to accumulate four properties in just seven
years,” she says.
Now a picture of vitality, Aishah White
returns to Costa Rica at least four times a year;
she is developing a luxury rental property and
recording studio there. “I did go back to all of
those specialists to do tests again,” she says of
energy,” she says. “That was something I was follow-ups with doctors to check on her
missing in my life.” She also tackled another condition. “They said I’m in amazing health. I’ve
fear: getting close to snakes. “I literally almost been living my best life.”
sat on one,” she recalls, “and had to just face it Her healing journey has given her a whole
right then. But I had a spiritual moment where new lease on life, she adds. “I’m much more
I felt a connection to this being, and it changed hopeful,” she says. “I eat better, and I’ve taken
my perspective and released my fear.” up surfing! Before this point in my life, I had
Remote-working near the beach or in been thinking, This is the start of the decline.
coworking spaces in Costa Rica allowed her to But you can do whatever you want, no matter
be incredibly productive. The soundtrack of your age. I’m still peaking. I’m still on my way up.
the land’s wildlife and views of its plush That feels amazing.”
greenery were a far cry from the urban
landscape outside her office in downtown L.A. Davia Shannon, owner of Costa
“In my office, I’m looking out the window at Rica Retreats, helps Black
expats find a new home—even as
industrial buildings, graffiti, dirt and trash she builds generational wealth
everywhere,” she says. In Puerto Viejo, “I was for her children.
able to work with greater peace of mind.”

For White, finding a deeper level of
healing also required that she put distance
between herself and the U.S.—where the
energy for Black folks is often “so heavy,
murky and dark,” she says. “When you
remove yourself from all that, and you go
somewhere where there is light, natural
beauty and tranquility, you can’t help but see
there is a better quality of life.”
White isn’t the only Black American
woman who has traveled to Costa Rica for
serenity. Real estate developer Simone White Herbalist Joseph Hodgson, owner
of Juice For Life, a Puerto
(no relation) planned to visit for three weeks in Viejo smoothie and juice bar,
2020—and never left. She now calls Costa Rica helped to create cleansing,
custom-made juices for White.
home. “It’s a culturally rich, diverse community,
and everybody is committed to being happy,”
says Simone, who renovated a luxury property

POWER
PLAY This start-up
is changing the
dating game
for professional
Black women
By
Kimberly Wilson
Illustration by
Rich Chance

COMPUTER LOVE “
ike many Black women, Naza Shelley had We interview
L experienced the frustrations of what felt like a

never-ending dating game. A couple of years,
about 100 dates and no viable options later,
she decided to hit the online-dating-app trail.
Unfortunately, in searching for a site specifically tailored
and meet
every single
person in our
to professional Black women, she hit a dead end. After
community,”
all she’d already been through, she resolved to stop explains Sali
leaving her fate up to chance and instead taking the
odds of finding a love match into her own hands. In that
Hama. “Talking
moment, CarpeDM was born—because if there’s one to our members
thing a Black woman facing an obstacle is going to do, and learning more
it’s find a solution that will help us all.
CarpeDM is a tech-enabled matchmaking service about them...is
and video-based app designed to change the future of how we can help
dating for professional Black women. Per a 2019 Pew
Research analysis, Black women are the demographic
them find love.”
most likely to be unmarried—so Shelley’s app is not only —Naza Shelley
necessary, but right on time, following a global pandemic
during which many were confronted with the loneliness
of lockdowns and quarantines. CarpeDM combines traditional, human-led
Though Shelley is based in the Washington, D.C., area, matchmaking with the convenience of modern online
her dating experience is shared by single girls across the dating. Instead of swiping for hours on end, users set
country. CarpeDM is fighting against the stigma that many their match requirements and are sent both handpicked
Black women face online, where they are considered less and algorithm-created matches to either like or pass.
desirable than White women, according to data from a 2014 “We interview everyone, so we get to meet and see
study by OKCupid. After looking at millions of interactions every single person in our community,” explains Hama.
on the site between 2009 and 2014, researchers also found “And that has been incredibly valuable, not just for
that Black women received the lowest ratings of all women people as a service, but for us as professionals, too.
on the OKCupid platform. Almost a decade later, the Actually talking to our members and learning more
discrimination remains much of the same. about them and their challenges is how we can help them
A successful attorney, Shelley maintained an find love.”
unwavering belief in herself and was determined to build While there are many positives to online dating—
a dating platform that would benefit Black women. “I such as the chance to meet the love of your life—it would
come from a family that gives me permission to bet on be naive to think that uncomfortable situations don’t
myself,” she reflects. “But I always had the mindset that arise. According to a Pew Research Center survey, many
whatever I’m losing while betting on myself, I can get it users of other mainstream dating platforms, such as
back, right? So I was like, I’m putting all my savings into Tinder and Match—and particularly younger women—
this—I was able to save it one time, so I can save it again.” report being harassed or sent explicit messages. The
All the hard work that Shelley and her bestie from team at CarpeDM is determined to protect the lives of
Howard University of Law, Sali Hama, put in is paying the Black women who use the app, so all registrants must
dividends. In September 2022, the matchmaking duo be verified for security purposes. These factors include
closed an oversubscribed $1 million pre-seed round, led background checks of identity, employment, income,
by Elevate Capital—a rare and difficult feat for Black sex offender registry and criminal history.
women founders. As the CEO, Shelley is a living testament to the
“I almost had a skewed view of how hard it was to power of what she is building, as she’s road tested it for
raise capital, because my first raise was actually friends herself. “I dated someone from our app for a little over a
and family,” says Shelley. “Sali was one of my first year and a half,” she reveals. “And even though that
investors, and she gave me $1,000. So I went around to relationship ended earlier this year, it was really cool to
all my friends and family, and I was like, ‘Will you give me use myself as a guinea pig to assess both our algorithm
$1,000 to start this company?’ And through that and our matchmakers’ matching process.”
process, I raised around $118,000. It wasn’t until we If you’re a Black woman in the position and phase
moved to trying to raise institutional capital through a of life where you’re open to and able to receive matches
venture and angel round that I really realized—like, and dates in a meaningful way—maybe it’s time to
Wow, this is very difficult.” CarpeDM.

Choosing Freedom
At peace
Imani Bashir reflects on the
duality of being a Black Muslim
woman exploring life abroad
in Egypt.
abroad has been easier, but what I will say is

it does come with privilege. I’m a Black
Muslim woman who wears a hijab, and people
don’t see me as American at all until I open
my mouth to speak. I find that this accent
means something of importance to them,
and it’s placed on a pedestal in some ways.
The biggest challenge is remembering to
breathe easy. I feel like in the U.S. you can
never breathe easy, and you always have to
keep your head on a swivel—but abroad you
can find a good balance.
ESSENCE: Safety concerns are usually

the main hesitation for Black women looking
to follow in your footsteps. Do you feel safe
living and traveling out of the country?
Bashir: One thing I am happy about in my
American-ness is that I am constantly aware
By
Danielle Pointdujour of my surroundings and people. Women are
targets around the globe, so I don’t ever
Blaxit, the term used to describe the exodus of Black people from America forget that, no matter how comfortable I am
in a place. I believe it’s important that you
to destinations across the globe, is nothing new. However, with racial
build community, learn what neighborhoods
tensions on the rise in the States, more Black people—in particular Black are a no-go and learn to speak a bit of the
women—are seeking their peace abroad. Due to the relative safety and language, so that people aren’t planning to
lower costs of living, plus career and romantic options, Black women are rob you right in your face. I think safety is
moving everywhere from Guatemala to Ghana. This is the choice Imani relative to the individual, but for me, even in
Bashir made, and she is thriving. With a one-way ticket in hand, she set off on hijab, I do feel a level of safety because I keep
myself aware.
a journey to find her freedom. Here, she shares lessons learned; the
countries she thinks are safest for Black women; and why she stands with ESSENCE: What countries specifically have
fellow hijab-wearing women in Iran on their right to choose freedom as well. you felt safe visiting or living in?
Bashir: Cancún in Mexico has been safe
to live and travel through. I felt extremely
ESSENCE: You’ve spent the last seven years like China, where it’s not easy to translate welcomed and safe in Poland and also in
living abroad in several countries, most Mandarin into an app or navigate the culture China. But Southeast Asia has to be my all-
recently in Mexico. What has the experience as a Black person, will truly show you what time favorite place on the planet. Malaysia
been like for you, and what have you you’re made of. The most important lesson and Thailand have some of the kindest
discovered along the way? I’ve learned is that many cultures have six people I have ever come across.
Imani Bashir: Having to learn new languages, degrees of separation, and we’re really more
customs and just how other people live can alike than we are unalike. ESSENCE: How do you feel you are perceived
be very trying on your spirit. However, it’s like as a Black Muslim woman, especially when
the saying about New York: “If you can make it ESSENCE: Is living overseas easier as a Black visiting Arab countries?
here, you can make it anywhere.” I have American woman? What are the challenges? Bashir: Arab countries really don’t recognize
applied that to being an expat. Somewhere Bashir: I wouldn’t necessarily say that living Black people in Islam, although we have

Breathing easy
in Pilanesberg,
South Africa.
existed since the beginning of time. They

act as though we can’t be Black, American
and Muslim, so they’re always questioning
our existence. Although the Arab world acts
like gatekeepers of the faith, they don’t own
it. It’s as much mine as anyone else’s.
ESSENCE: You’ve said on social media that

for you, wearing the hijab is a choice. What
led to that choice?
Bashir: When I was figuring out my career
path, I understood that as a woman in
sports journalism at the time, I’d be at a
deficit, and I’d always be challenged in my
field. But I wanted to make sure that I could
make my mark in media, and I realized
that it was imperative for my Islam to be
visible. I wanted people to recognize that
this is organically a part of me and to be
the example that many young Muslims
desperately need.
ESSENCE: Currently in Iran, following the

Fly in London.
death of 22-year-old Mahsa Amini, we are
“The biggest challenge is remembering to breathe easy.

I feel like in America, you can never breathe easy, and
you always have to keep your heard on a swivel—but abroad,
you can find a good balance.”
seeing women of all ages—especially are consequences for certain choices, world, lives her life and is unapologetic is a
young women—protesting and calling for but those consequences are not left to man, movement unto itself.”
C O U R T E S Y O F D A N I E L L E P O I N T D U J O U R (3)
the right to choose whether or not they wear and they certainly don’t require beating a
a hijab. What are your thoughts on this woman because you think her headscarf ESSENCE: What would you say to Black
movement? isn’t being worn “properly.” My way of women who are looking to find change and
Bashir: Islam holds women in a very high supporting the women is to continue to freedom in a foreign land?
regard. Throughout texts, women of the show up in spaces that people expect us to Bashir: I would say, do your research, find
book are spoken of with reverence—but be restricted from. People have these false a community you can trust and remember
unfortunately people conflate culture expectations that as Muslim women we are that your problems don’t magically disappear
and Islam, and they’re not synonymous. supposed to be docile and uneducated, and because you’ve created a new life abroad. I
Everything in Islam says we have a choice, walk 10 paces behind a man. I certainly am would also say to them that they absolutely
because as humans we were given free not that woman. So being a Black woman in deserve a soft life and all that it entails,
will to do or not to do. Allah just says there hijab who’s outspoken, who travels the including peace of mind, body and spirit.

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Aries with on a st t how ffic
date oy you u
(March 2 ity family with ou. To hand lt con
1 to Apr
i that and yo h e le c - of
Did you l 19) will frien ur p lp cl onfl y
leave th g ds a rt ea r ict r ne
ings on ive ner, u e
The ener
gy aroun a bad no your or opt soci he
t jo aus d.
down tho d you wi te with mind for aliz a c en
ll lead y s o m eone? a n e n r
se barri ou to br a cr
eati ew acti ) rk o mpe ad r
others d ers; you 18 e e -
efine yo
u
’ll reth
i n k
eak ve r
e
v-
ry mba r t a d ws o much
with the and how how you s e t. ua e ou to ho a
world. T
ry manif
you shar
e your j
let br you t y in e s ou
want out Fe e y
of life
by writi
esting w
hat you
oy
to s as t l turn orit ve
’
ng it do
wn.
truly
i u s 2 0 ce Do s n to f av l gi
r o th ur wil
ua ry pr y.
Ta
uru Aq anua the ver w pa g yo is
o e h
(A
p s (J ust isc t n hin . T
Wh ril r -d gh tc ok
y T lf ri wa bo
pl ha 20 t se is b nge- new
e v
yo asu e yo o Ma h i
t y b g a ak.
reveal your lighter side.
outgoing will spark creativity and allow you to
how to let loved ones into your life. Being more
force you to set clear boundaries
Your limits aren’t negotiable. This time will
(October 23 to November 21)
Scorpio
u
yo r r res? u be y 20 Tr adin bre
u e
ar ba sou Ins en d ) re eded
e l r
re . Y anc ces tead enyi ne
s o e
yo tau u ma d a . Co , tr ng y
u o ra y nd n y o
ut nts wan ma side foc urse Pisces
an t t kes r e usi lf 20)
of (February 19 to March .
yo d t o s yo ver ng
ur ry t u y o
li
f Loo k at you han dli ng conflict like a pro
co i ar t th n e’ cov ere d
h
mf ng a t pa e i ing how s si have dis
The balance that you
or n t m so long as
t z ctiv tron div that o u ple rec ent ly will help guide you,
on iti iz idu k se con cis e and level-
e. es ing al eep you contin ue to be
y s ng tri gge red . Your
th
at new ou headed and avoid bei
wi l be fre sh opp ort uni ties that
ll reward wil
s.
ge
t ensure monetary succes
are
and
uths Cancer
ober 22)
ce. As tr ations
o Oct ptan xpect (June 22
show
Libra mber 22 t tice acce elease e to July

e pt e pra c t o r u’ll be Human co
nnection
21)
(S
im e to l l need d en . Yo While th is what
t i d ly
It’s ed, you w t well hi ve, fami
you
ings bei brings u

o sat well ng out o s togeth
Ca ece e s nd in am mpo dit nd
v ea l e ke p of l with you f our co er.

re av rs
(D u’r s—a ing d f s i me r mi
you h ntrol ha
e doo ting
pr mb ta yo te ily rt at ba
concentr , now is s never

that sed by th ccess wai
Yo her dur an it’ to ou
ate on t the time

ico er rt u
he joys to
ot lm ess ut ime t y
i su flow to
surpr tion and and poss
rn
you natu
ca sin , b e t ge
c friends rally. M ibilitie

conne pened.
bu gun som s to
will be u sic, foo s that

be ke or
o your saf d, danci

to be e spaces ng and
22 ing are e c You t t and on
Ta tdo
.
ou
to to ’t nv
Ja se li er ar ep br ack
nu e
ar ho ng i
ns .
n
y
19 yo it. ns s o h yo e
Gemini
)
o
w
ki sat eer len ace .
(May 21
to June Virgo r 21)
u
to Septembe n of
an e
e old versio
r
Your im 21)
pulses (August 23 you that th
co Tr ela nly urs
c
might s will be en show ing yo u

rson
me y t te ju el
et off put to Life has be with the pe

o
o ha is th
every c your te the tes not aligned ting the pe

ople
of o r d t st f.
r em tr
onflict mper. R t, and yourself is alua

has to emember that t by reev
f
r
is the St ar and
ck
. ons,
most im end in that no aspire to be yday decisi
to ma
s t
you. Fi po rtant l evered ti e your ever
nding a esson t es—this who influenc w
e o
to redi new hob his tim mind with ne

rect an by will e can t
each broaden your s.
tive outlet
in
y pent- be a gr crea
up aggr eat out books and
ession. let
94 ESSENCE.COM JAN–FEB 2023 HOROSCOPES

FEBRUARY OUTLOO
K—FEELS LIKE LOVE
As Mercury in re
trograde comes
communication wi to an end on Fe
ll no longer be bruary 7, it’s
it will give yo a struggle. Use a great time to
u the courage to the solar eclips fall in love. Cl
embrace that new e to manifest ma ear
you decide to be version of your gnetic energy;
come a better lo self and put it
intensity this ver or a succes into action. Wh
month. The timi sful entreprene ether
ng is divine! ur, go after wh
at you want with
full
Vi
Tau (A rgo
Sa Nov re You yo I
(Ap rus Ol ugu

gi em a
( u’ . at d ur th
tt b s a
Min ril wi d b st
Yo ver th an yo se
ar er u ve ea l c im u d
2
iu
th th usi 23
o e es en u
wil gle i 0 to
s 22 iv ma bu me ny. se
se olv be pla
new l bec s yo May tr is a p ne to

w s ap
u 2 us en ro ss Se
you fina ome r mi 0) t
ha he
d p
sec ddl as eav osa par pte
rv
to or de si b Y rve
n
t
h c
h
sup ave ial ond e n yo or l— tne mbe

De , b you nes ck u .
unr port bee op na ame u . R bu rs r

u wi es yo
ce ut r s. le wil
eco sys n no port ture thi as e t 2

m
se ly yo may 1)
mb th st “ ad l
gni tem tic uni as s mo u

er e an Th in fi
n
zed i
for ng ti you nth s o
s. n k
l
es m n
. the how . Th ’re . Ne Yo the ay f ock
t at
21 tim ce ow g t nal
you e p int two

) e cl m he ly
m.
o
u
t
You ’ve eop rod rki e

wi opi el on
rw le uc ng ll ni he yo
o
ork alway aro ed t

a o
re on si ur
fo ea e
wil s be und o tu of ta do
r r, to pac get
e
ln en rn n or
r
fi a t k”
ot a t t
vi hos ab
gh nd he
go
ct e ou
ti f
or yo t
ng ol
io u
is ks
us
Capricorn .
(December 22 to January 19)
Leo
(July 22 to
Rome wasn’t
trying to
those who
instead of
cannot wear
Aries
It is okay
All confusion has been removed from your sight,
(Marc causing you to feel like you have 20/20 vision.
h
Start 21 to Apri It’s time to take control of your life, as
b l
meeti rewing cof 19) events have been moving too quickly for your
ng fe
to be s are on t e! Mornin
do it all,
love you.
made, he ca g bus liking. The energy you have been preserving was
August 22)
putting up
in
not to be
le
built in a
done. and y
ou’re ndar. Deci ess for this moment. Everything is about to change
that superh
If yo sions
days, u man the o for the better!
y age t ne to need
late- ou’ll be c o han
dle the
get t
he jo
night elebr se lo b
parti ating ng
es. your
succe work
Choose to
and learn
okay.
ss wi
th
a tough ex
day. Stop
ero cape in
el t?
G ay t ay o R l l
em
fe igh e
(M gh w t ia ee
it d r ak
in 1 me a
Li our en pe o f .
es an o t s.
y
Do ft y t tie me
be vulnerab
how to lean
li at e th
to c ss hi eo ut
g? i so
so .
) e t
s
th hos t
22 hin ey l uni bil nd
terior. Yo
focusing on
t s h m
Ju and ion s e. you

t bou
er c n rt si a
definitely
ne le at an S t
b t o o n
a
,
to n i g m pp po on
P
21 s a e n e ar he
Oc bee din n o res riz

c
w
&B so ab
) nd ig nj e sa
to m a l ho
en u a
22 pal n l yo nci the .
e
le
t
r e r
on
a
u
e t e e n n y Scorpi
m o
f b ff fi wa
ra emb le e o o
em hts y s hi me
o s
Lib ept our hav ay ese n i the
n
br a we s wa
(October 23 to Nov .
d h
ember 21)
ac wa et o
(S s y you th m th tio on Not quite in a lov

e it t nt yo
Ha ke mon rom aca is ing mood right now

o t
Aq nua our of , if t y
th y re h u
you’ve been trying ? Even as

li is ak f se v R&R
(
to improve yourse
e ou at wi fe
J
u
Tr
been supportive of fam lf, you’ve

a
lo a s th el
ari y 2 el joy. you ou.
Th bre pri ded

th e t ses
ily and friends. They

ea ill wor s it
g
ve s wi
have noticed—
us
a sur nee and want to treat

e k he
iv os .
on rse
you this February

m
co you th
r
yo
A ch- to show
e p lf
their thanks. All

y
mi
ow people to see how

u
mu amazing
ng
you are.
y
0 t f—y
e
s
r ld
Ca
o F ou ou h an o ki
(J ncer
se
eb
u
Sl ne
ru eser ve s ly a er
o 2
an w d 2 to
a
d o
d
so ob wn a Jul
ry
Y
bu
m s
ho e t erv nd s y 21
18 it! much ept
ld im e t )
v
de e t all ay c
)
a
c
Pisces ar o e y l
(February 19 to Mar . Y nj ou os
ch 20) ou oy hav e to
Be
o
n
Your voice is your r fr rec e ac hom

Co
gift. Learn how to ie on

network nd ne comp e th
mp ale hat
and unlock that hid

nd
den potential. The s a ct

cc to
l i
ar
has your back, but uni verse nd ing ish s mo

t
it’s up to you to
i
that people know you make sure fa wi ed, nth

so to
mi t
r name. You have wha ly h p and . Si
ni
nt no
t it
t
takes to make some ha eop ta t

real money off you ve l k
r natural-
s
born talents. Use

them! mi e yo e
ss u
ed
yo
u.
HOROSCOPE BY AMBER LITTLE JAN–FEB 2023 ESSENCE.COM 95

“Relationship objectives should
be big, long term and approached
like a business,, with SMART
goals—meaning goals that are
Specific, Measurable, Attainable,
Relevant and Time-Based.”
—CLARENCE MCGANN, SALES
STRATEGY MANAGER, BEAUTYCON
“This is true love: Freedom to

be my full, authentic self. Safety in
each other, so we can evolve to
the highest versions of ourselves.
Strength in our union to withstand
the creation of a new world.”
—IMANI NUÑEZ,
MOTION GRAPHIC DESIGNER
“My desired partner will

help elevate my personhood by
inspiring and pouring into
me. We’ll be aligned mentally,
spiritually, emotionally and
sexually.”
—DOMINIQUE BRIELLE FLUKER,
CONTRIBUTING LIFESTYLE EDITOR
“Trust, open communication

and mutual support are what
relationships are all about.”
—BROOKLYN R. WHITE,
FEATURES EDITOR
“My goals include faith in each

other, passion and a healthy
dose of spontaneous fun. From
random dance sessions in the
kitchen to having uncomfortable
but necessary conversations to
LOVE
creating generational wealth, I
Celebrating Black hope my relationship goals are
couples is in always rooted in respect, loyalty,
the ESSENCE DNA.
This January joy and love.”
1973 issue still —BRIDGETTE BARTLETT ROYALL,
inspires.
SENIOR RESEARCH EDITOR
RULES!
“Relationship goals look like
mutual respect, adoration and
compassion. It’s like a comforting
blanket that has you feeling loved,
secure, protected and stable.”
—TIFFANY JOHNSON,
ASSOCIATE ACCOUNT MANAGER
Our staffers share relationship goals to aim
for—whether you’re already boo’d up or still
ESSENCE ARCHIVES
We want to hear from you!

searching for The One What do you think couples should
prioritize to achieve a healthy, happy
partnership? Use the hashtag
#RELATIONSHIPGOALS to let us know.

Spreading Kindness
from our family to yours
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