Emaester - Writing Task 1 Evaluation - Mock Session

EMAESTERS_WRITING TASK 1_MOCK EVALUATION 3 LETTERS_5 REPORTS
You are studying a short course in another country. Your accommodation was arranged by
the course provider. There is a major problem with accommodation.
Write a letter to the course provider.
In your letter: say what the problem is
Describe the accommodation you thought you were getting
Ask the provider to solve the problem
Dear Sir,
I am writing this letter to bring to your notice an issue that I am facing with the accommodation
that you have provided. I, Aatish Kapur, am a student pursuing the 6 month6-month architecture
diploma and am residing in the studio apartment that you have arranged for my stay. I am in a
predicament as I am extremely uncomfortable by the state and surroundings of the apartment.
To begin with the water supply is extremely erratic and I rarely have water available. This leads
to a lot of discomfort as the elixir of life is something you cannot be without. Secondly my
neighbours are students of music and dance thereby play loud melodies throughout the day. I am
unable to concentrate on my studies and my grades are suffering as a consequence.
Initially I was lead led to believe that stays facilitated by the academic institutions will be
convenient for their students. I was informed that the living conditions would be audited prior to
the provision of the rooms and was assured that the environment would be stress free. I am
disappointed to say that this is surely not the case.
I would request you to relieve me of my discomforts in this situation and provide me an

alternative location to live. If that is not possiblepossible, I would require that you ensure that the
hinderances stated in the letter are taken care of so that I may concentrate on my primary purpose
of enrolling for the course.
Looking forward o yourfor your reply and resolution to the conundrum.
Yours faithfully,
Aatish Kapur
TA – 6
addresses the requirements of

the task
presents a
purpose that is generally
clear; there may be
inconsistencies in tone
CC – 6
arranges information and ideas

coherently and there is a clear overall
progression
uses cohesive devices effectively, but

cohesion within and/or between
sentences may be faulty or mechanical
LR – 6
uses an adequate range of

vocabulary for the task
attempts to use less common
vocabulary but with some
inaccuracy
makes some errors in spelling
and/or word formation, but they do
not impede communication
GR & A – 6
uses a mix of simple and complex

sentence forms
makes some errors in grammar and
punctuation but they rarely reduce
communication
6+6+6+6 = 24/4 = 6
You and a couple of your colleagues would like to participate in a work-related seminar.
Write a letter to your colleague who is the person in charge of the seminar and ask for:
Detailed information regarding the dates
Program schedule
Enquire about cost and possible discounts for group
Dear Mr. Rakesh,
I am writing this letter with the intent to enquire about the symposimsymposium on Work Life
Balance which is scheduled in the next week.
As you know how stressful it has become to cope up with balancing both the office and the
home, I along with ten of my team members were really keen not to miss this meeting. I would
like to know about the dates for the seminar, as it would be extremely convineantconvenient if
itsit’s on the weekend.
Also, I would like to know about the complete arrangement of the conference so that each one of
us can plan accordingly beforehand.
All of us were really willing to know the amount of fee we require to pay to become part of this
special event. It would be extremely generous of you if we a group of ten participants are
considered for some sort of waiver.
I really look forward to hear from you soon.
Yours sincerely,
Nitish khajuria
TA – 6

the task
presents an
overview with information
appropriately selected
CC –6

progression
may not always use referencing clearly

or appropriately
LR – 6

inaccuracy

GR & A – 6

sentence forms

communication
6+6+6+6 = 24/4 = 6
Foreign friend of yours plans to visit your place and stay with you, but you are not available
on that date. Give your friend another alternate date for the visit.
In your letter, you should:
-Apologise for it
-Explain what you are doing on that date
-Suggest to him/her an alternate time to come.
Dear sam,
Hope you are doing well! I am writing this letter to inform you about the date which you had
decided for staying here with me.
First of all, I apologise for telling you that on that week i I will not be available due to my office
urgent work as you know I am working as a manager in HP so I have huge
responsibilitesresponsibilities on my shoulders.
To commence with, our company is going to lauchlaunch new product in that week so my
company appointed me as a chairman of lauchinglaunching committee so I have to look after so
many things like arranging the hotel and appointing staff members for various duties. Moreover,
presentation will also be hosted by me.
AT At last, I suggest you to come atleast 10 days later so that we will be will be able to spend
time together as well as surf beautiful places here.
I look forward for your prompt reply.
Yours truly,
James Bond
TA – 5.5
the tone may be variable and

sometimes inappropriate
presents, but inadequately
covers, key features/bullet

points; there may be a
tendency to focus on detail
CC – 6

progression
uses cohesive devices effectively, but
cohesion within and/or between
sentences may be faulty or mechanical
LR – 6


GR & A – 6

sentence forms

communication
5.5+6+6+6 = 23.5/4 = 5.875 = 6

The diagram below shows the average hours of unpaid work per week done by people in
different categories. (Unpaid work refers to such activities as childcare in the home,
housework and gardening.) Describe the information presented below, comparing results for
men and women in the categories shown. Suggest reasons for what you see.
The given bar graph illustrates the comparison of unpaid work per week done by married men
and married women in different categories.
Looking from an overall perspective, it is readily apparent that average hours of unpaid work
done by men in various scenarios has no significant change whereas the working hours without
remuneration by women (no children) is just double the hours with women (three or more
children).
It is evident that on an average 30 hours of unrewarded work per week is done by women with
no children and around 18 hours of work is done by men of same category. On the other hand,
married women with 1- 2 children are investing remarkably huge amount of time(50 hours per
week) in child care or household chores and men in the same group works for less than 20 hours
per week with no wages.
In regard with men, having more than three children contribute around same number of hours as
compared to other categories of men whereas women with at least three children are sparing
thrice the numbers number of hours as being devoted by men in same group.
TA – 5.5

the task
the tone may be variable and

sometimes inappropriate
CC – 6

coherently
uses cohesive devices effectively
LR – 6


GR & A – 6

communication
5.5+6+6+6 = 23.5/4 = 5.875 = 6
The line graph shows thefts per thousand vehicles in four European countries between 1990
and 1999. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make
comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.
The given line graph illustrates the comparison of car theft within four countries over a period of
a decade (1990 to 1999)
Looking from an overall perspective it is readily apparent that over the given period maximum
number of car theft cases were observed in Great Britain.
It is evident that 18 thefts per thousand vehicles were found in Great Britain in 1990 and it
further fluctuated in the range of 18 to 20 vehicles till 1996 then a steep reduction was there
which ended up with 16 thefts in 1999. However, in Sweden six cars were stolen in thousand
vehicles in 1990, followed by an increasing pattern till the end. Within the period of 1995 to
1996 nearly 13 cars per thousand vehicles were stolen and reaching at 14 cars in 1999 ultimately.
On the other hand, France and Canada displayed a similar pattern with seven thefts and six steps
in 1990 respectively. In both the cases, the whole pattern was tracing its path between 6 to 8 cars
theft and finally coinciding together at six cases among thousand vehicles in 1999.
TA – 6.5
clearly presents and highlights

key features

the task
CC – 6.5

progression
uses a range of cohesive devices

appropriately although there may be
some under-/over-use
LR – 6.5

uses less common lexical items

with some awareness of style and
collocation
GR & A – 7
has good control of grammar and

punctuation but may make a few errors
produces frequent error-free sentences
6.5+6.5+6.5+7= 6.625 = 7
The diagram below represents the “Comparison of how urban Chinese spent across major categories
in 1995 versus the spending habits in 2011”. Summarize the information given in the diagrams. Write
at least 150 words.
The illustrated pie chart presents a differentiated statistics on the commodity spending
behaviourbehavior of the Chinese metropolitan residents in the year 1995 and 2011. Some major
categories provided in the diagram are food, clothing, household services, commutation,
residential usage and other petty spending. Out of which, a highest amount is seen to be spend
spent by the Chinese on food both in 1995 and 2011. In contrast, he the lowest spent segment is
medicines and other consumptions as of 1995. It can be inferred from the representation that
there has been a rise in the expenditure on many sectors, in 2011 which were once not heavily
spent in 1995. Some of these includes medicines, transportation, recreational activity such as
education and other commodities. On the other hand, there is a drop in the spending of clothing
and food from 1995 to 2011. Moreover, it can be also seen that financial utilization of House
facilities and residential usage sector remains the same in both the years.
TA – 6

the task
presents an
presents a
clear; there may be
CC – 6

progression

or appropriately
LR – 6


GR & A – 6

sentence forms

communication
6+6+6+6 =24/4 = 6
The diagram below shows the process of Biogas plant. Summarize the information by
selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The given illustration demonstrates the process of generating electricity in a biogas plant.
Overall, the process consists of five main steps, beginning with wood waste, agricultural wastes
and cow manure as raw material for the production and culmination of the process by supplying
power to 16,000 houses and heating 700 homes in techumtectum.
To begin with, the mixture of wood waste and agricultural waste is fed into evergreen bio grinder
by a feeding conveyor along with the combination of cow menu and evergreen catalyst to
instigate the process. The mixture is proceeded towards anaerobic reactor before undergoing
hydrolyses in a tank. Gas blowers are attached in between the whole process to pass the gas from
one place and send it to the another. Gas polishing is done within the reactor and in the next
stage, it is passed through a digester tank and gas collecting membrane. Out of the two outlet
from the tank one is attached with the heat centre telecom where boiler house and generator
provides heat to 700 ohms in techum tectum. This pipe is further subdivided and attached to a
generator which in turn provide power to 16,000 homes. ohms
The second pipe from that digester tank is having the discarded part which is segregated by a
separator in the form of solid digest state reuse as a source soil conditioner and remaining as
storage for liquid digestate which is used reused liquid fertilisers.
TA – 6

the task
presents an
presents a
clear; there may be
CC – 6
progression

or appropriately
LR – 6


inaccuracy

GR & A – 6

sentence forms

communication
6+6+6+6 =24/4 = 6
The table below shows the changes in Fuel used for Electricity from 2016 to 2017. Summarize
the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where
relevant.
Renewable(s) *Wind, solar, geothermal, biomass, waste, biofuels etc.
The given table illustrates the variation in the products used for generation of electricity over a
period of 2016 to and 2017.
Looking from an overall perspective, it is readily apparent that there was an increasing trend in
the consumption of all the given fuel for electricity generation except oil.
It is evident that intake of coal was highest among all other categories, followed by natural gas
and then hydropower. Interestingly, all of the above are producing electricity more than
400TWH in both years 2016 and 2017. In addition to that, three of them were comprising of
around 60% of the share of total production.
However, sources utilisation of renewables (wind, solar, geothermal, biomass, waste, biofuels
etc) for production of electricity showed a remarkable change of 307TWH in two given years
and alone devoted a proportion of around 50%. The global nuclear generation using nuclear
energy was 2613TWH in 2016 and 2636TWH in 2017, contributing around 4% of the total
share. The remaining other category was having around 1% of the total. Therefore, the least
usage of was 178TWH in 2016 and 183TWH into 2017.
TA – 6

the task
presents a
clear; there may be
CC – 6

progression
not always use referencing clearly

or appropriately
LR – 7
uses a sufficient range of

vocabulary to allow some flexibility
and precision
uses less common lexical items

with some awareness of style and
collocation
GR & A – 6

sentence forms
6+6+7+6 = 25/4= 6.25 = 6

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EMAESTERS_WRITING TASK 1_MOCK EVALUATION 3 LETTERS_5 REPORTS

I would request you to relieve me of my discomforts in this situation and provide me an

Looking forward o yourfor your reply and resolution to the conundrum.

addresses the requirements of

arranges information and ideas

uses cohesive devices effectively, but

uses an adequate range of

uses a mix of simple and complex

Dear Mr. Rakesh,

I really look forward to hear from you soon.

addresses the requirements of

arranges information and ideas

may not always use referencing clearly

uses an adequate range of

makes some errors in spelling

uses a mix of simple and complex

makes some errors in grammar and

I look forward for your prompt reply.

the tone may be variable and

covers, key features/bullet

arranges information and ideas

uses an adequate range of

makes some errors in spelling

uses a mix of simple and complex

makes some errors in grammar and

5.5+6+6+6 = 23.5/4 = 5.875 = 6

addresses the requirements of

the tone may be variable and

arranges information and ideas

uses cohesive devices effectively

uses an adequate range of

makes some errors in spelling

makes some errors in grammar and

clearly presents and highlights

addresses the requirements of

arranges information and ideas

uses a range of cohesive devices

uses an adequate range of

uses less common lexical items

has good control of grammar and

produces frequent error-free sentences

addresses the requirements of

arranges information and ideas

may not always use referencing clearly

uses an adequate range of

makes some errors in spelling

uses a mix of simple and complex

makes some errors in grammar and

addresses the requirements of

uses cohesive devices effectively

may not always use referencing clearly

uses an adequate range of

attempts to use less common

makes some errors in spelling

not impede communication

uses a mix of simple and complex

makes some errors in grammar and

Renewable(s) *Wind, solar, geothermal, biomass, waste, biofuels etc.

addresses the requirements of

arranges information and ideas

not always use referencing clearly

uses a sufficient range of

uses less common lexical items