1.

The longing Never knew I could feel like this Like I've never seen the sky before Want to van ish inside your kiss Every day I love you more and more Its not just lust. No. Its longing. Even though I never tried it before, I have ne ver wanted anything more in my life than this. And lying here beside him, the lo nging in me exploded. He was just so beautiful. I could look at him for days and still never understand how anyone in this world could be so perfect. His gorgeo us, perfect, pale skin made his deep bronze topaz eyes so easy to get lost in. I often caught myself stopped breathing when I looked into his eyes. And I just c ant help myself from stirring at him! I always feel an extreme need to touch him, to reassure myself that he really is real. And when I touch him, sometimes that not even enough. Its really hard to understand why this top model has chosen to lay her beside me Everything about him is just so breathtaking. Its almost unbeara ble. Even though he is hard as a rock, it just feels like Im melting into his ski n when I touch him. And his cold skin always makes me shiver. But its not the col d that makes me shiver. Its just that feeling of touching Edward, being physicall y close to Edward Its like fire inside me! But it doesnt burn in a bad way; my body feels all warm in a very comfortable way. But when you look behind the comforta ble feeling, the longing for him to be closer is always there. I dont think Ill ev er get used to the feeling I get when I touch him. Never. Hmm, if I should expla in my life in the last two years with a few sentences it would probably sound so mething like this: Hi Im Bella Swan, just an ordinary girl expect for my two leftfoods and general clumsiness. Oh, yea then two years ago I ran into this guy, wh o by the way is beyond stunning, and I totally fell in love with him. And by som e miracle I still dont understand, he fell in love with me as well. The last two years with Edward Cullen has been the best in my 18 year old human life. There i s one thing about Edward He is a vampire. Oh, so now you probably think Now that m ust mean trouble, and yes 1

youre right! During the last two years I been in several near-death experiences, which including being chased by a masochistic vampire who really just wanted to track me down, a revenge-filled woman vampire who later on the created a whole v ampire army to chase and hunt me down. And if that isnt enough I have the stronge st and most powerful vampire family, the Volturi, waiting for a reason to kill m e So yea. I guessed I should be scared to death by now. Well, Im actually not. Its j ust impossible to be scared to death when youre lying next to Edward. Well, I gue ss lying next to Edward makes it impossible to think about anything else than hi s perfectness and the constant desire I feel towards him. So, yea, the feelings that are humming inside me at the moment just doesnt allow any space for fear. Bel la, beautiful sweet Bella As much as I love staring into your deep brown eyes, its killing me not to know what youre thinking. And you have been so quiet all night ; its so frustrating so please let me into your mind sweetheart Edward said, and of f course he could easily see that I had something on my mind that I didnt tell hi m. Luckily he cannot read my mind, like he can with everyone else and thank god for that! The thought of Edward reading my mind at this moment made me blush and look down. I couldnt tell him what I was thinking! I guess I didnt want to sound D esperate? And who was I kidding. I was desperate! More desperate than I had ever been before. And for that I was embarrassed. Embarrassed that I was longing so hopelessly for Edwards touch. I was hungering for his sweet breath close to mine, to feel his smooth, cold fingers against my skin, for his lips to come closer. But Edward wasnt that kind of guy. Any other guy wouldnt waste any minute with a l ustful girl beside them, who just wanted to get wild, be physical and lose contr ol with her boyfriend! For that was indeed the biggest desire and longing in my life at the moment. But Edward made very strict rules about the topic. And he wa snt going to give in. He wouldnt lose control with me because he was afraid that h e might hurt me. So silly! How mange nights I have been dreaming about it. About him. Dreaming about laying only in underwear with Edward lying beside me, cares sing my body, kissing me 2

from the neck to the collarbone and further down... The thought just made me blu sh even more. Bella! Edward cried Tell me whats on your mind; I dont want you to feel uncomfortable. Psst, how could he even think it? Like it was possible for me to feel uncomfortable with him lying here next to me. And then, I felt his cold han d as he lifted my chin. I shivered. Please, love? he whispered with the most melti ng expression in his eyes, while he breathed his sweet breath in my face and daz zled me completely. Like I was able to tell him anything when he did that to me! I had to blink a couple of times to bring myself back to present. Edward... I sto pped. How could I ever tell him this! I knew he would immediately say no, and I would feel rejected and hurt. But the thing about Edward is that he always wante d to give me things and presents. I know that whatever material thing I would wi sh for, he would give it to me the exact moment I asked for it. The only problem is that Im really not the material kind of girl. However, now there is one thing I want. No, not just something I want, its one thing I need. Edward. I need to b e physical with Edward. The only thing he will never give me is the one thing I crave for. Edward, I I. Oh, god I cant tell him this! Ugh, I just have to give it a t ry. I have been thinking about something and I blushed again. Love, dont be afraid or embarrassed, you can tell me anything. You dont have to keep secrets from me he s aid and leaned forward and kissed my nose. And only that little physical contact had made my heart sound like Id been running 10 kilometers non-stop. Off course Edward heard my heart changed. And I know that he loved how such small things as a kiss on the nose, could light a fire inside my body, which because of my easi ly blushing and uncontrollable heartbeat was impossible for me to hide. 3

Well... I continued You know how youll always talk about buying me a new car or take me to some fancy restaurant and stuff like that? I said, smiling a little while looking down, holding one of his perfect hands in mine. Well sure I was using di rty tricks by appealing to his desire to pamper me and buy me new stuff, but I r eally would do anything to make this happen and maybe a mixture of compromise an d pleading would give Edward second thoughts. Huh, well I guess I can only hope. So I slowly raised my head to read Edwards expression, which really wasnt hard at all. He almost got Christmas-candles in his eyes by the thought of buying me pr esents or spending money on me in general and then he answered: Yes love, and you finally see a reason to change that silly, slow truck of yours for something mu ch more Bella-standard? I wrinkled my forehead as I spoke Edward, I keep telling y ou not to dizz the truck, its running fine and that was not what I meant! I tried to look mad, which really wasnt easy when youre only a few inches from the person s who give your whole existence meaning. Edward just chuckled at my attempt and leaned closer to me, his lips heading for mine. My heart started running like cr azy and I tried to calm down. My body shouldnt really react this way every time h e came close to me, but I seriously couldnt help it. And then when his perfect co ld lips finally touched mine, my exaggerated breathing stopped altogether Then af ter a few seconds of non-breathing-just-enjoying-kissingthe-most-wonderful-person -in-the-world moment, Edward pulled a few inches away from my lips allowing be to breathe while he whispered and almost growled a little: Mmmmhm Bella, youre so se xy when you are trying to play angry and then he gave me the most dazzling crooke d smile and before I even time to pull myself together, he leaned forward and ki ssed me again and now even more passionate than before. I took all of my small, silly, human self-control to not just jump on him and rip his shirt off! It was almost torture when he pulled away and ended the kiss. Im really just human after all. How am I supposed to resist such a godlike temptation as Edward? 4

I have to tell him what Im longing for, and then deal with whatever reaction ther e would come from Edward afterwards. After a few minutes my breathing started sl owing and I began talking again: Edward, if you want me to tell you what Im thinki ng you really need to stop distracting me like that which only resulted in Edward pulling his whole body away from me, moving over to the other side of the bed. That was definitely not was not what I meant by distracting me, and he knew that. N o! I cried and tucked myself closer to him I never asked you to move away from me, you just have to decide if you want us to kiss all night long, which I certainl y wont protest against, or you can let me sit here and tell you what my mind has been wandering about most of the evening. But there is no way I can keep up a s erious conversation with a galloping hard and a blushing head, looking like a fr eaking tomato. Personally I wouldnt mind the kissing all night option I said, lookin g up at him as I made my eyelashes look long and leaned closer to him as I reach ed for his cold perfect lips with my mouth. I tried to make the kiss last longer by clinging one of my hands into his hair and the other one to his back, but wa y to soon he took both of his hand on either side of my head and then slowly and gently pulled me away. Wow, I was really surprised with myself. I have never re ally been confident, seductive, sexy Bella. I surprised him too; I could see it in his incredible topaz eyes. Silly, sexy Bella Edward laughed, and I laughed too because I had just been thinking about myself as sexy Bella, which wasnt a charac teristic I often would give myself. You really should give me some offers which a re easy to choose between. Either way Ive been dying to hear what youve been think ing about all evening and thats an opportunity I just cant refuse. And about the k issing he said and winked to me, which was so unlike Edward, there is no way that m y self-control would last more than a minute with you being in the mood that you are at the moment, and I dont mean it as a bad thing, Im just being realistic lov e he said, smiling at me. Okay, so there is no turning back now. I took his hand in mine again as I began to spoke, my voice suddenly trembling a little: Okay Edw ard, so heres the deal. First of all, I want you to let me finish before you come with any objections or anything else I said as I traced one of my fingers upside 5

down his arm. Edward just looked at me and he really couldnt hide the curiosity i n his eyes, so he just nodded and encouraged me to continue, so I looked down at his arm as I spoke again: Well, as I tried to say earlier on, before you distrac ted me, there actually is one thing here in the world that Im desperately longing for, and its a thing that only you can give me. Well, okay its not really a thing , its more like a human experience. And as you know Im planning on soon enough to become a vampire, and spend eternity with you, but before that happen, there is one thing I would like for you to give me. Well, maybe its more an experience you can give us both I stopped, looking up at Edward. He should have realized by now where I was getting at, but looking into his eyes, there was nothing but curios ity to be found. I took a deep breath and instead of looking down again, I conti nued looking him deep in his eyes as I said: Edward, I want you. I want you in ev ery way I can possibly have you. With that being said, as I feared the worse comi ng from Edward, all his reaction really did was surprise me. He just smiled and pulled me closer into his cold and hard, but yet still very comforting and perfe ct chest. Silly Bella. YOU already have me in ANY possible way you can. Im ALL you rs, love. How can you even question that? He said. Gaaah, he hasnt really understo od the meaning behind my words in every way I can possibly have you. So I had to m ake myself very clear. Great. Edward, that was not what I meant, even thoug it ma kes me very happy to hear. But if you think about it, I actually dont have you in every possibly way that I want to have you This made Edward raise an eyebrow. May be he finally understood what it was that I was asking from him. So before he st arted to argue against it, I quickly continued: There is one human experience I r eally, really want to have before Im turning into a vampire. I want to... I took a deep breath to sleep with you, to become one with you Edward. That is my biggest wish. Thats what Ive been thinking about all evening, thats the one thing I want y ou to give me I stopped. I had made my point clear. 6

I prepared for the rejection, for Edward to start arguing, telling me Im insane a nd that it was totally out of question. But he said nothing. It suddenly felt ve ry quiet in my room. Too quiet. Edward was as motionless as stone. Then out of t he blue, something snapped inside Edwards head, because in a movement to fast for humans to see and react to, Edward had pushed me away from his lap, and he was now standing in the middle of my room. I couldnt look him in the eyes. I was afra id what I might find in them. But that didnt mean I was going to give up, and if he wasnt planning on saying anything, then I would be the one to break the silenc e. Edward, please consider it. I know that you dont believe you have the self-cont rol to go through with it, but thats just nonsense. I dont believe that you would or could ever hurt me, it that was the case you would have done it by now! I wan t to do this with you, Ive never done it with anyone before so I really dont have any experience on the subject, but I just know that Im ready now, and Im ready to move into third base with you, and yea, that did sound kind of phony but I know what I want Edward. And please say something, so that I can stop babbling! I then realized my heart was pounding very fast and my chins very more red than ever. I then lay my arms around me knees as I sat in the bed, waiting for Edwards respo nse. More minutes passed, and still nothing. Then a new feeling overwhelmed me. The feeling of rejection. And it overwhelmed me with more force than I ever woul d have thought possible, because I already knew that there was a big chance that Edward wouldnt be too exited about fulfilling my wish. But still, sitting there and letting all my guards down, telling Edward my biggest wish and need, and not getting any response at all but the feeling of rejection, I couldnt hold the tea rs back. I laid my head down on my knees as I cried silently. Stupid Bella I thoug ht. You shouldnt have told him anything, now he probably wont ever touch you again because he fears you might jump right at him God, I hate being human, following m y instincts. 7

But what only felt like a minute later, I felt Edward stroking my hair, and in l ess than a second I found myself at Edwards lap, cuddling into his chest. I felt his sweet breath in my face, as he used his thumb to remove the tears from under my eyes. Bella, please dont cry. That wasnt my intention at all. I just didnt know what to say. Please dont cry love, I cant stand to see you cry he said as he stroke d my back. Your request Well I guess I could call it that, well it just made me so frustrated that I really I didnt know what to say, so that you wouldnt be hurt an d misunderstand it. I looked up at his beautiful face, and I knew I couldnt blame him that he wasnt feeling the same feelings as me, plain, ordinary, human Bella. E dward I said, I understand why you dont feel the same need for me as I do for you. Im only human after all. And everything inside me is craving for you; I just cant seem to get enough. Im sorry I began to cry, I just felt so rejected in the momen t. Please forgive me for that. Im just so attracted to you that I cant seem to con trol my emotions sometimes. Im so sorry. I shouldnt have expected you to feel the same way as I do, because, yea, as I said Im only human and My sentence came to an immediately stop because in that exact moment I felt Edwards lips on mine, his sw eet breathe in between my lips, and they allowed me to say no more. I let my ton gue touch his under lip, and I really couldnt help it, Edwards taste was the sweet est thing I ever had my tongue on! When he pulled away from me my lips where all swollen and well, I kind of forgot what I was saying before the kiss. And that I guessed that was what Edward wanted to be the consequence of the kiss because then he began talking: Bella, love. You didnt even give me a chance to explain my frustration; you just made your own conclusions. Im frustrated because I have bee n wanted so badly to be able to give you something that really would make you ov er-the-top happy. But not my new-car, new dress or fancy restaurant offers had b een anything for you to hold interest in. And now, when you finally want somethi ng from me, more than anything else, is has to be the one thing I find the harde st to go through with I was about to protest again, but he just held a finger in front of my mouth and I let him continue: 8

I dont think you even understand how much Ive been longing for you, in some of the same ways that you have for me. First I didnt understand the feeling inside my bo dy. It just feels like I never can be too close to you. As he said this, I felt h im cuddle me even closer to him, and I was happy to follow his plan. And the idea of me satisfying you Oh, Bella its the most tempting thing Id ever felt! Believe m e when I say that Im more than attracted to you. I just cant seem to get enough of you either. You are the center of my universe Isabella Swan. So please accept t hat, and stop thinking stupid things about me not craving for you! He stopped, an d then kissed my forehead, and I knew that he could feel my body being more rela xed. He then continued: But that really doesnt change anything. I am more than ple ased with that you trust me to never hurt you, because that is a promise I made and I will always keep that promise. But if I lose control with you, if I agreed to go to third base with you, as you termed it, I could not trust myself to kee p that promise Bella. When a Vampire lose control, you are totally giving in to yo ur senses. And if Im not able to combine my senses with my mind and my logical re asoning, then there could be a chance that I could hurt you. What if what I mean t to be a gentle stroke on your arm would end up breaking it? Edward shook his he ad, and I could see he got an image in his head which truly pained him. I can nev er take such chances with you love. And for that I am truly sorry, because all Iv e ever wanted was to give you everything you asked for. Okay, so his words really did paralyze me for a minute or two. And the minutes of silence seemed to made Edward think that the discussion was closed, and now we could talk about somethi ng else because then he just said: So, what are we going to do this weekend? while he smiled his beautiful crooked smile at me. Okay, so I would have to try one l ast thing before I would give up this discussion. So I moved my head away from h is chest, and placed my body in front of him, my head just few inches from his a nd looked him deep in the eyes while I spoke: 9

Edward, please. Im beggin you, please consider it. I I really, really want us to jus t try He interrupted me, trying to stop me from begging, but I couldnt help it and my uncontrollable human emotions made my eyes tear-filled, so I looked down. Ple ase Edward, let us try, if I feel uncomfortable I promise to tell you, I promise that we will stop immediately, but please let us give it a try first. It would just make me so happy I stopped, I didnt know what else to say. And yet again, I wa ited for the rejection, for Edwards final No, Bella but it never came. Instead Edw ard lifted my chin, and looked me straight into the eyes, his expression almost pain filled, as he spoke with soreness in his voice: Bella, i I dont Bella It was so unlike Edward so sound nervous when he spoke, usually he always were in perfect control of all situations I cant stand listening to you begging. It hurts so badly . I want to make you happy, more than everything else in this world. I I promise you that I will think about it. I need to talk to Jasper and Emmett about it. Im just as inexperienced as you are on this subject. I want to make it right, I wan t it to be perfect It almost sounded like he was talking with himself now I could never hurt you. Never. I Well, can you please give some time to think about it, t o figure out how it could work? He said, as he stroked my cheek. Oh, this was so unexpected. Had Edward just said yes? Oh okay, I hadnt heard him say yes, but he promised to think about it, to figure out if it would work . I had no idea my pl eading and begging would work this way on him. Well, the game isnt over yet. Okay , game might be the wrong word, but I couldnt help feeling like being on the high horse! So I was not getting my wish fulfilled tonight, but I was determined tha t with a little (Okay, maybe a lot) persuasion I would get what I wanted from Ed ward. I gave him a quick kiss on the neck before lying down in my bed, my head o n his chest as I whispered: Okay, I guess I can spare you a little time if thats w hat you need and I couldnt help having a smile on my face as I slowly drifted into sleep. 10

2. Persuasion Your arms are lovely. Yellow and rose Your back`s a meadow. Covered in snow Your thighs are thistles and hot-house grapes You breathe your sweet breath. And have me wait So two weeks went by, still no news from Edward about my wish. And my 20-year-ol d birthday is just creeping closer and closer every day, and Ive already decided that I would be transformed into a vampire before Im leaving my teenage-years. Ye a, if Edward was staying in his teens forever, well then the same goes for me! U nfortunately, talking about my farewell to humanity and hello to immorality was no t on Edwardss top-10 list over subjects he loves to discuss. And neither was my w ish to have sex with him. But believe me when I say, that really doesnt stop me f rom brining the subject up whenever I get a possibility to do it. But Edward alw ays found new ways to distract me. And in the last two weeks we spend more time down in the living room with Charlie than we ever had before. Well, surely I cou ld deal with the whole I-dont-want-you-to-become-a-monster-andlose-your-soul that E dward was complaining about, because that was now out of his hands. Carlisle alr eady agreed to do the transformation if Edward wouldnt. But it still bugged me th at we couldnt even talk about it, because reality is that Im becoming a vampire, a nd Edward might as well get used to the thought. But like I said, the we-dont-talk -about-Bella-becoming-a-vampire I could deal with, because 11

when the transformation was done, Edward would have forever getting used to the thought of me as a vampire. But the other issue, well, the sex issue, we really didnt have eternity to figure that one out, and I was SO tired of all the excuses and distractions Edward pulled on me. Did he really think that I was that stupi d? I could see right through him. So one night I decided it was time to invite s exy Bella out of the closet again. We were lying in my bed. I was wrapped up in a blanket, Edward lying next to me shirtless. He sounded really relaxed while he was humming my lullaby. I guess he was glad that I had not brought up the lets-ge t-it-on issue tonight. But that was only because I couldnt really think about anyt hing else than the God of beauty lying half-naked next to me. It was the most brea thtaking sight ever seeing Edward shirtless. Thats another thing about him I dont think Ill ever get used to looking at. His bare chest was unbelievably perfect. V ery muscular, but not in an extreme way, no it was just right, just perfect. See ing his stunning body, smelling his sweet, delicious scent and hearing his soft, velvet voice humming by lullaby, well the lust building up inside me was just u navoidable. I let my fingertips trace his collarbone and afterwards letting them explore his entire godlike chest. Edward let out a sigh, but luckily I could te ll that the sigh indicated that he enjoyed me caressing him, and he didnt stop me . So I would start by being a good girl, not doing anything that might upset him or put an end to our cuddling. But being-the-good-girl was definitely not my plan for the rest of the night. I let my fingers trace up his jaw line to his hair, and then I began tousle in it. He let out a silent growl. That seriously turned me on. Why did he have to be so stubborn, I could see that he really enjoyed thi s, enjoyed us being physical. 12

A little more touching wouldnt do any harm. Hmphf. While I grumbled with my own t houghts, I continued tousling his hair. But then I felt an extreme urge to do so mething more, take it to the next level. To push my luck. So I gently pulled my hand out of his hair, and then positioned like I was about go to sleep. So I jus t lay all still, thinking about my next move. I would have to be fast, or else E dward would stop me on the halfway. So I would have to do something really unexp ected. By the thought of the things I could do to him my heart began beating ins anely fast. Grrr, why did my heart always have to give my intensions away? I kne w Edward heard my heartbeat changed, so before he could react to it, well before he really could react to anything at all, in one quick move I swung myself on t op of him, sitting on his lap, while he was still lying down. Oh, he really didnt see that one coming. And trust me; it takes a lot to surprise a vampire. Bella, what are you doing He began, but before he could finish his sentence, I reached ou t and placed my fingers on his lips. Dead silence passed between us as we looked into each other s eyes. I let my fingers slightly trace over his lips. I looked into his eyes for what seemed like an eternity. He didn t stop me. I slowly lea ned forward and gently kissed his lips so softly. Then I pulled back slightly, h oping and waiting for any encouragement from Edward. Surprisingly, he then place d his hands on my face and I more than willingly lowered my body on his, until I could feel every inch of his chest at mine. He then leaned in for a deeper kiss and so did I. I felt his lips part and touch mine. His tongue gently probed my mouth for entrance. I parted my lips and allowed his tongue entry. Our kiss was so soft and pure, like nothing I had ever experienced with Edward before. 13

Unable to stop it, I let out a silent moan. The kiss became deeper and more inte nse. I let my fingers run through Edwards hair as he held me close. I pulled my l ips away; I needed to get some air, to breathe. Then I looked at him, looked him in the eyes again, and saw such a look of love and passion in his eyes that it took my breath away yet again. I had never seen him this way before. Our lips th en forced their way back to each other, with more intensity becoming deeper and rapid as our hands roamed each other s bodies pulling each other closer if that was even possible. I had definitely woken up the monster inside of him, only thi s wasnt the monster who was craving for my blood. This was the monster inside Edw ard who was craving for my body, as much as I craved for his. I felt the triumph rushing through my body as I realized this battle was going to be a lot easier to win than I first feared! If this was all it took to talk him into having sex with me, I had surely wasted my time the last two weeks. So this new feeling of victory made me wanting to push the boundaries even further, along with Edwards s trict rules. As our bodies felt like they have totally melted together, I gave m y best trying to take my top of, which really wasnt easy with Edwards stone arms, holding me as close as my fragile human body allowed him. But I kept on trying a nd eventually I got a good grip on the top and I had almost slipped it up, when I felt Edwards body stiffened below me. No no no no no my mind began telling me. Th is was definitely one of signs when Edward thought we crossed a line, and the fu n was soon to be over No no no, react Bella, do something my mind kept telling me. But I knew that there was nothing left to do. Edward gently put my top back in its place, and then pulled me down on the bed. I shouldnt be surprise that Edward stopped. We already broke almost every rule that he had made about our physical relationship. But I didnt feel sorry. No. I never felt this alive before! My hea rt almost ripped out of my chest with its beating speed. My head again looked li ke one big red tomato, my lips were swollen to double size and my hair was a tot al 14

mess. I turned my head over to look at Edward, and was surprised to see that Edw ard looked just as blown away as I felt. Off course he didnt look like a mess at all, but he had a really hard time slowing down his rapid breathing as well as I did, and I could see that he clenched his fist into the sheets. I wanted to say something. But it was nearly impossible with my heart beating at double speed. Eventually I managed to whisperer with a trembling voice: E-e-e-dward, that w-a-a s T-h-h-at was Wauw. I didnt know what else to say. Edward then turned his head over to look me in the eyes. It really suited him to be out of his perfect self-cont rol. His hair was also a bit messy from all my grabbing. Im so sorry Bella; I shou ldnt have let it get that far, but you Well you took me by surprise and I guess th ere was a lack in my self-control because I really couldnt find the strength to s top you, to push you away and I for that I am truly sorry I stopped him, what was he babbling about! Edward that was the best minutes of my life, dont ruin it! Beca use Im not sorry. I never felt more alive before so just stop regretting it, plea se! I touched his cheek as I leaned in for another kiss, only this kiss was very innocent and sweet. I pulled away, smiling at him, hoping that I was convincing enough. I love you I said And Im very proud of your self-control, I think you did a perfect job. Practice makes perfect, right? I winked at him. Bella, you should go to sleep now. Its been a long night. Edward responded. Oh, come on, why did he had to be so serious. He smiled a little at my obvious irritation with him and then leaned forward placing a soft kiss on my forehead Sleep now, beautiful and then h e began humming my lullaby. Slowly I let my body relax and I gave in to his beau tiful voice as I drifted to sleep. I woke up the next day, feeling great. I stre tched my body, my hand searching for Edward and I totally relaxed as my hand fel t the cold from his marble hand. 15

I peeked out in my room to catch a glimpse of Edward, but it was much lighter in my room than I expected, so I closed my eyes again. I coddled myself closer to him as I asked: What time is it? Its one pm love he answered. One pm? Wow I really m ust have needed the sleep then. How did I get this tired? I felt so rested now. I took another sneak peek my out into the room. I needed to see the beautiful bo y lying next to me. Ah, the first thing I saw was Edward looking down at me. Off course, his perfectness stunned me as always. But there was something about his eyes. They werent my favorite topaz color, no, they were actually almost black. God, how long had I kept him from hunting? He was always so good to remember my human needs; I need to learn to pay more attention to his needs vampire needs as well. Luckily, soon enough we would be equal on that part. I smiled at the thou ght. But then I tried to look serious and asked him: Edward, when was the last ti me you were out hunting? Youre eyes are kind of giving you away. He chuckled. My Be lla, always so observant. Obliviously I wasnt observant enough, because then I wou ld have told him to go hunting earlier. Well, its a week or two. But it really doe snt matter that much, the painful thoughts of being away from you kind of makes m e forget the thirst he said. The thought of him being away from me wasnt tempting. But he needed to go hunting, he shouldnt make things harder for himself, I know its not easy for him to be around me even when his not thirsty, but when he is th irsty its painful for him. Edward, I demand that you go hunting with your brothers today. I dont like that Im keeping you from hunting and I know that its hard for y ou being around me when youre thirsty. It made me sad than I hadnt noticed it earli er. Edward saw it in my face immediately. He took his hand and gently brushed my cheek Dont be sad dear, its really not your fault that you are unbearably hard to be away from, even if its only for a day. 16

I tried to smile at him, but failed. I hate that my scent caused him that much p ain. Enough about my hunting. Im dying to know what you have been dreaming about m ost of the night. You were making some quite He smiled my favorite crooked smile a t me as he continued interesting noises. Oh, I really didnt think that I dreamt las t night. My body felt as if I had a very peaceful, dreamless sleep. No, wait. I do remember something. I dreamt about Edward and I dreamt about Oh my god, I look ed away from him, completely blushing. I did dream last night. I dreamt that Edw ard and I Well, lets just say we crossed a lot more of Edwards rules than me and Ed ward did yesterday. And I guess I didnt just dream about the noises our actions m ade me say. I had actually moaned in my sleep. I was too embarrassed to even loo k at Edward again. I heard him chuckle to himself. I guess he could kind of gues s what my dream was about then. As the pictures of my dream last night floated a long inside my head, it made me think about the things Edward and I actually did do last night, and somehow my deep craving for him began running through my bod y again. We did so well last night, we definitely should give it another go. But deep inside me I knew that my tricks from yesterday wouldnt work on him now. He would be prepared and he would instantly know my intensions. I needed to try som ething new to persuade him into believing that he has enough control to sleep wi th me. And help wake up the craving he had for my body to be close to his as he had shown me yesterday. Hmm maybethen I got an idea. I didnt know if it would affe ct him, but it always helped in movies so I might as well give it a try. And I r eally didnt feel like talking about my dream last night either so I quickly said: Well, I had a very pleasant dream and lets not talk about it anymore. I cant help were my mind is taking me when Im asleep. But back to the hunting. You really sho uld go hunting today. I would love to spend some quality time with Alice; I have nt 17

seen her in days. I miss her. And by now shes probably already seeing me coming o ver for a visit, so if I canceled now she would just be upset. I really hoped Edw ard wasnt about to be stubborn. But he just smiled down at me, pulling onto his l ap. Then he kissed my quickly on the mouth. Well too quickly. But I was too busy inhaling his delicious scent, that I didnt even have time trying to me the kiss last longer. Im sure Alice would love that, I know she misses you too. And it wou ld be a lot easier leaving you back home with Alice. Then I can be sure you wont go playing with werewolves The thought of Jacob sent a twinge of pain through my body. He was still missing. He had run away. Away from me and all the pain I was constantly causing him. It hurt so much to think about him that it made my eyes filled with tears. Love, Im so so sorry! I know you dont like to talk about him, I know it hurts for you to even think about him. Im sorry, I shouldnt have brought that up Edward said, as he stroked my back, comforting me. He really shouldnt comf ort me. I didnt deserve it. And I was just the biggest coward because I have trie d so hard to suppress the guilt I felt when I thought about Jacob. And I missed him. I missed him very much. His big smile, his bear-hugs, his laugh...I just mi ssed my best friend. But I couldnt and wouldnt take about him in front of Edward. I know that it hurts Edward to think about me and Jacob, though Edward tried to be reasonable about it. Its n-n-n-ot your fault Edward, its just a very touchy sub ject for me t-t-to talk about I answered him, wiping the tears from my eyes. Bella I want you to feel that you can share everything with me, you know that right? I nodded. But if you want to change subject there actually is something I would li ke to talk about. Or rather, ask you about he smiled a very tender smile at me, a nd then my hopes immediately went up. Was he already prepared to discuss the who le sleeping together issue with me now? The exact thing I thought about most of the time? And apparently also dreamt about now? 18

You see love, the thing is my parents and my siblings are planning on visiting Ta nya, Kate and Irina in Denali next week. Off course they asked me if I would lik e to join them and the offer goes for you as well. But then I thought that maybe you and I could do something else instead. Because this will mean we could have the whole house to ourselves. And I really dont get to spend much alone time wit h you. Well, I mean not without sneaking in your window in the night behind Char lies back. I guessed my face must look quite surprised because Edward quickly cont inued: And if you rather go and meet Tanya and her sisters then I can mostly cert ainly understand that as well. You decide, love. I tried to focus but my mind was already picturing the whole next weekend inside my head me and Edward alone, no other vampires with exceptional hearing, no one to disturb us, me and Edward tot ally alone all evening, all night long. Oh! I gasped. This would fit perfectly into my plan in persuading Edward. I would love to! I said, very enthusiastically. A li ttle too enthusiastic maybe. Well would you love to spend the weekend alone with me or with my family at Denali? Was he being serious? Like I would ever pass a ch ance for a whole Edward-Bellahome-alone weekend! Well, being home alone with you of course! I smiled. Edward then sent me a brilliant smile in return. Oh shoot. Wha t about Charlie? Im sure he wouldnt approve med spending the whole weekend alone w ith Edward. Okay approve would be an understatement. He would simply forbid me t o do it. What about Charlie? He is not going to be too pleased with the idea. Oh, w ell I actually already thought part trough. But my plan contains some lying to C harlie Edward knew I didnt like lying to my father, but in this case I guess it was worth it so I nodded in agreement. Well you should tell your father that my fami ly and I are leaving town for the weekend which isnt a total lie. But that Alice wants to stay back home because she wants to totally redecorate Jaspers room as a surprise for his birthday. And that Alice doesnt like to stay home alone so ask him if you could have a sleep-over weekend, 19

helping her with the surprise. I will do my part to make it sound convincing of course. You think you can do that, love? He sounded a little skeptical. Edward kn ew I was a bad liar, but this shouldnt be too hard to pull off. You really have a lack of confidence in my lying-skills I said trying to sound offended. Just being r ealistic darling he answered smiling and leaned forward to kiss my nose. Sure, sur e I mumbled, as I prepared to go downstairs and say good morning to Charlie. I tu rned around, looking at Edward as he sat there on my bed, looking incredibly gor geous. See you in ten minutes? I said. Ill miss you Edward said smiling as he stood u p and wrapped his arm around me. I love you he mumbled in my ear and then the next second he was gone out of the window. I felt the right part of my heart jumped right out of the window with him. I sighed and headed down to Charlie. Hello slee pyhead Charlie greeted me. Morning dad I smiled at him. I fried some eggs and sat ne xt to Charlie. Umh, dad? He looked up from his newspaper Well its just because Edwar d and his family is leaving town next week to visit some friends in Denali in Al aska. I wanted to stick to the truth as much as possible. But Alice wants to stay home to prepare a surprise birthday-present for Jasper. She wants to give his ro om a complete make-over. But she doesnt like to stay home alone, but she cant take the risk to ask anyone from her family to stay home with her, because she is af raid that they might reveal the surprise. So she asked me if I would like to hav e a sleep-over weekend at her house, helping her with the surprise. Thats okay, r ight? I tried to sound casually as I spoke. First Charlie looked skeptically into my eyes like he was trying to find a hint of lie in them. But I really, really wanted this weekend with Edward so I had my best pokerface on. Eventually he gav e up and just nodded to himself: Well thats so sweet of Alice and of course she sh ouldnt be home alone! Edward was also leaving, right? I just told him that Edward and his family was leaving. 20

Yea dad, Edward is also leaving. Then Charlie smiled. He really wasnt being fair to Edward but I guess he was just overprotecting, the whole daddys little girl thing. Im going fishing most the weekend anyway Bells, so you should go have a girlsweek end with Alice. Then there was a knock on the door. Finally I thought to myself. Oh, that must be Edward I said, trying to sound surprised. Of course I already knew that he would come but Charlie wouldnt be too happy to know I already spent the w hole night next to Edward in my bed. He stood in my doorway, looking perfect as always. He had changed clothes as well. I couldnt help smiling all over my face a s I saw him even though it only been ten minutes since I last saw him. And I fel t whole again the minute his was in my sight. I know that Edward had been eavesd ropping on my conversation with Charlie because he practically beamed when he sa w me as well. So it worked he whispered in my ear, to low for Charlie to hear. I tol d you that you dont give me enough credit for my lying-skills I whispered back as I lifted one of my eyebrows. Edward just chuckled, kissing me on the cheek. Then he went for the kitchen. Hello Chief Swan Edward greeted Charlie. Charlie mumbled a silent hello in return, not even caring to look up from his newspaper. But th en suddenly he looked up, looking kind of smug. So Edward, what are you going to do next weekend? Oh my, he still tried to figure out if I was lying before. Oh I t hought Bella already told you Edward answered, looking confused at me. Of course he was totally in on the lie. Well, my family and myself are going to visit some old friends in Denali. Well, all of my family except Alice. She is determined to stay home but she doesnt want to tell any of us the exact reason why Edward said, looking very thoughtful. God, he was so good at this. I almost began believing t hat it was the truth he was telling. 21

Which remind me he now turned to look at me, and winked as he did Alice wanted me to ask you, no rather demanded me to make sure you dont have any plans for next wee kend. I smiled at him and rolled my eyes Im way ahead of you Edward; I already made plans with Alice next weekend. Always one step ahead of me he answered smiling, pr obably at his own little private joke, and then he took my hand and squeezed it lightly. I looked over at Charlie. He seemed truly convinced now. I actually prom ised Alice I would come over and visit her today as well, she wanted to fill me in on the details about the weekend I began dragging Edward to my room. I knew th at Charlie could still hear us as we made our way up the stairs because then Edw ard added Please Bella, tell me what shes planning, I promise I wont tell anyone! I closed the door behind us when we were in my room. And then I had to laugh. We w ere a really convincing team. And somehow I couldnt seem to stop laughing again. I wrapped my arm around my stomach, trying to calm myself. Then I felt Edward co ld arms around me and he kissed me in the hair. I dont think there is anything mor e beautiful in this world than you laughing he whispered in my ear, dazzling me w ith his sweet breath and scent. I freed my arms from my stomach and caressed his face with my fingers as I leaned in for a kiss. I felt his sweet breath between my lips and my heart stopped beating. I let my fingers find their way into his hair and he grabbed my back tightly, closing the distance between us completely. He let his lips trace down my jaw line, down to my neck. Then he loosened his t ight grab around me and removed his lips from my neck whispering as he chuckled a little As much as I love this, you should breathe love. Breathe Breathe Oh yea I g uess I should breathe. let the air fill my lungs, only to once again be overwhel med by his delicious scent. Well, should we go to my place then? Edward said smili ng at me. Yea we should. I had plans, I had to remember that. So I quickly picke d a pair of jeans, and a sweatshirt to wear. I went into the bathroom, taking a quick shower, changed clothes and went back to Edward. 22

Mmmhm, you really do look lovely with all wet hair he complemented me. I took his hand as we went for his house. 3. Preparation We arrived at Edwardss house and went for the door. Alice already was already wai ting by the front door with a big grin on her face. Of course she knew what my p lans for the day was and I she was thrilled. What took you guys so long?! Alice sa id, as she pulled me in for a tight hug. I really have missed her. Sorry Alice, b ut Edward and I had some persuasion to take care of I said as I smiled to Edward. Yea so I saw. You and Edward are not going to come with us to Denali next week? Well thats really a shame, I will miss you both she said with a teasing smile on h er face. She already knew what my mind was decided about trying to do when me an d Edward was going to be alone next weekend. I blushed a little by that thought. 23

Then Emmett came out and gave me a big hug. Missed you lilsis. Awesome that you fo rced Edward to go hunting with us today. We need some brother-quality time, its b een years! Emmett said as he laughed. Emmett and Edward greeted each other with a high-five. Well, Im sorry Ive been keeping him Emmett, I try to be more observant about his needs in the future And I hope he will stop being so stubborn about my biggest need I thought to myself. Dont worry love, the best thing I know is being kept prisoner at your place Edward said, brushing my cheek which made me blush ag ain. Okay enough with the love-talk Emmett interrupted. We have some hunting to do. And Alice has been head over heels all morning, waiting to do whatever Bella ha s decided to go doing today I could see in Edwards face that this fact made him cu rious, but he didnt question it. Then Jasper came outside, greeting me with a gen tly clap on my shoulder. I smiled at him. Shall we? Jasper said, gesturing at the woods. Hell yea, lets get out of here! Emmett agreed. Edward then turned to me, gav e me a quick kiss on the lips which made my heart go absurdly fast. And of cours e all the excellent-hearing vampires around me heard which made them laugh out l oud. Edward just chuckled to himself as he whispered in my ear I love you. Ill see you later today. Then they disappeared into the woods. As soon as they were out of sight Alice took my hand dragged me into the house. Bella I cant believe this! You actually want me to take you shopping?! Of course you should let me buy you a whole new wardrobe, but I bet you wont let me do that anyway. But Im sure we can find something youll like. I spend a little time on the computer trying to put s ome outfits together which will look great at your skin tone. Oh Bella, Im so exc ited! she babbled on and I smiled an apoplectic Hello-nice-tosee-you smile at Carli sle and Esme who just sent me compassionate smiles in return. We went into Alices room. She finally stopped talking and I quickly utilized the moment to speak 24

Alice, I know you already saw what I was planning on going shopping, so dont even go there with all the new outfits. Its only one thing in particular I want to buy . Yes, I would go for the big clich and try to wear sexy lingerie in my attempt to persuade Edward. Maybe it wont work but its worth a shot. And as I thought earlie r, it works in the movies all the time. God, I was desperate I blushed and looked down. Yea Bella I know that you want to go shop some new lingerie. I just though t that I interrupted her Alice, I know that you will take whatever chance you can i n buying me a new ward rope, but buying new pretty lingerie is already a new big step for me in my shopping-experiences so please keep it light. I need your hel p here She grumbled to herself. Please Alice, only lingerie today? Alright Bella. Bu t I guess I should tell you that Edward really hasnt made his mind up yet. He is still not sure that he will be able to sleep with you without hurting you. I kee p seeing two different scenarios in his future. One where he sees himself goes t hrough with it and another where he is ending up hurting you I thought it would b e really embarrassing to talk with Alice about me and Edward problem, but it was k ind of a relief to finally have someone to talk about it with. I know Alice, but I will try to persuade him anyway. I love him so much, and I really feel ready f or this. So what else is there left to do? Well, I guess its sexy lingerie we are shopping for then Alice said encouraging. I really love Alice. Its such a relief t hat shes able to see things from my point of view. I looked up and sent her a ner vous smile. Bella I dont believe that he is able to hurt you either, but when I co me to your safety he really doesnt listen to any of us, only his common sense. Bu t I will help you anyway. So lets get going! and the next second I was in Alice ar ms, as she ran with inhuman speed down the stairs out into the garage. I managed to yell a See you later to Carlisle, Esme and Rosalie before we were out in the c ar. We will go to Seattle, the lingerie shops in Port Angeles really isnt worth pa ying a visit Alice said while we drove, mostly to herself. 25

I wasnt totally done talking with Alice about me and Edwards issue. I was very curio us. Alice? She looked at me. She should pay attention to the road, even though I k now that vampires really dont need that. Its just that Well, I wonder how does it fe el? She already knew what I meant. She thought about it for a minute. Hmm, how can I describe it Making love is really intense. For those who are in love its the mo st beautiful thing in the world to share. You will discover each other in a new amazing way. But for two vampires its a bit different than with humans. Well, and especially a human and a vampire She winked at me. So I wouldnt know exactly how i t will be for you and Edward. But I guess its not that different for you two, bec ause the way two are devoted to each other is almost as strong as the love betwe en two vampires. She smiled at me now. But dont worry too much about it Bella. You and Edward are made for each other and Im sure you will fit perfectly together in any way possible That thought made me smile because thats what I believe as well. It will be perfect. We are meant to be together. Thank you Alice. I needed someo ne to talk to. Anytime Bella. But now she said as we drove into a parking lot Its sho pping time! She truly was beaming now. I couldnt understand how we got here so fas t. I guess our talk distracted me from following the road. She started dragging me in and out different shops, mumbling and arguing with herself saying somethin g like And they call that quality and This set doesnt even match! Horrible colors! Th n we went into Victorias Secret and were greeted by a smiling, classy shop assistan t: Hello and welcome! Any questions about your bra size? I can take care of that right away! She had already put tape measure half way around my chest and I was b lushing like a maniac, when Alice interrupted No thank you, we are perfectly sure about what size she uses and then sent a dazzling smile at the shop assistant. I t took a few seconds for the shop assistant to get a grip on herself 26

Oh, well you just let me know if theres anything else I can help you with then and then she turned around, ready to attack another victim who just stepped inside. Tha nk you Alice I whispered. Alice lay her small arm around my shoulder, leading me forward. Bella, I didnt really do it to save you from anything. But I already know all your measurements to perfection and there is no reason to waste time in mea suring you again when I know Im right Oh God, here we go again. Alice found severa l sets she wanted me to try on. There really was a big unexplored lingerie world Ive never heard of before. Almost every time Alice found something new she wante d me to try I blushed. Blushing by the thought of myself wearing that kind of th ing in front of Edward. It had seemed like a good ideauntil now. So here I was st anding in front of the mirror in the fitting room looking at the pink fabric tha t covered my body. Well covered was an overstatement. I blushed even more. It se emed that every piece I tried looked worse than the previous one. I was so close to giving up. Edward would laugh himself to death seeing me in this. Well, if v ampires wasnt immortal he would. Then Alice came inside, interrupting my retreati ng thoughts. No, no, no. Definitely the wrong color for you. And you really dont l ook comfortable in it either Well that was an understatement. Alice, I dont think t his is going to work Sexy lingerie is just not my thing Bella! Quit it! Of course i t is your thing; expect for the wrong color you look absolutely stunning. And Ive just happened to run past the most beautiful marineblue set which Im sure will m atch your skin tone perfect. So STOP being a baby about this. Sexy lingerie is e very womans thing. They just need the perfect set. Alice had put her fists onto her hips as she gave me that speech. Stubborn little pixie I mumbled. Alice rolled her eyes Just try the set Bella. And then she stepped back outside, giving me some pri vacy 27

The set contained marine-blue lace hot pants, with a cream-colored bow on each h ip. The color matching bra also had a cream-colored bow in the middle of the bra . Then there was this short, black, translucent kimono to wear outside on the se t. And I have to say, I actually liked it. I liked that it was pretty and simple . Of course I blushed a little at first, but I didnt feel the need to hide inside a big sweater when I looked at myself in the mirror now. I felt pretty? Maybe ev en sexy. But the most important thing was that I was feeling comfortable. I coul dnt know what Edwardss reaction would be but at least I liked it. Then Alice stepp ed inside the fitting room again and when she saw me she threw her hands up to h er mouth and started jumping out of joy Bella! Its perfect! It suits you perfect, you look so good! Overreaction, thats the word. But I didnt expect anything else fr om her. Well, I actually kind of like it myself as well. So I think its a winner. I smiled at Alice. Sure, I did love the set. But I couldnt really stand the though t of anymore shopping either. It truly was exhausting. Then my stomach started t o rumble and I rubbed my hand at it. And Im really starting to get hungry I continu ed. I could see in Alices change of expression that she wasnt satisfied that I onl y brought one set but I knew she wasnt going to argue with me. I have warned her about my conditions on going on this trip. Okay okay, lets get the human some food then Alice grumbled. Of course I didnt get to pay for the underwear because by th e time I changed back to my own clothes Alice has already paid for the lingerie and waited for me outside the store. I just signed, and decided not to start arg uing. I got outside. Wow. How long had we been out shopping? Its all dark now. No wonder Im hungry. But now I felt another kind of hunger inside. Edward. I missed him so much. Would he be home by now? Hmm. I still needed to eat. Edward would notice it immediately if I was hungry when I got home and he would blame Alice. 28

What do you want to eat? Alice asked. I looked around and noticed a salad bar. I c ould take one to-go and eat it on the way home. Ill just take a salad and eat it o n the way home. Im kind of tired anyway. Shopping is totally draining my energy I stretched my arms and pretended to yawn. Really Bella? Acting has never been your biggest talent and I know why youre in such a hurry of getting home. Its always a bout Edward. Edward, Edward, Edward. I love you too, you know. Aw, that hurt! Its not that I dont like spending time with Alice. Its just hard to be away from Edwar d at the same time. I took her cold stone hand and squeezed it. Though, Im not su re she could feel it. Alice, I love you too and you know youre like a sister to me . But consider me addicted to Edward. Its sort of impossible for me to be away fr om him for too long Well maybe its time to go to rehab then. And I was just kidding anyway. But sometimes you need a reality-check Alice giggled. I just rolled my e yes at her What kinda salad do you prefer? she asked. Alice, I can pay for and pick my own salad I protested. Sure you can. But its rude not to answer. Alice continued. I just shook my head at her and started walking towards the salad bar. I picked their seasonal salad and was about to pay when Alice cried out: Bella! Look! and she pointed against the car. Oh, what now? I looked at the direction she was poi nting but I could see nothing. I slowly turned around, as I began demanding for an explanation when Alice smiled a huge smile at me, standing with my salad in h er tiny hands. I practically growled. I never agreed to let you pay yourself, and you are just so easy to distract. Sometimes youre so easy that it ruins all the fun. Well I guess its 1-0 for the pixie! she laughed. I wasnt done being pissed wi th her. Well, not really pissed, I couldnt be pissed at Alice. Ill give you some cr edit. You sure win the prize for being the most annoying pixie in the history! an d then I grabbed my salad, heading for the car. 29

As we drove home we didnt talk much. I wasnt angry with her anymore, but I was thi nking about the next weekend at it kind of kept my mind occupied. When would I s uddenly sneak the new lingerie on? Should I wear it from the beginning? Hmm. The n I remembered something I had to clear out with Alice. Alice? Do you think that you can try to not think about what we have been doing today when Edward is arou nd? I dont want him to know. He is not too happy about my whole persuasion-thing. I know its hard to keep your mind of something, but please try. Of course Bella, t ough, I would love to see the look on Edwards face when he found out she giggled. P lease, Alice? I continued. Sure Bella, but he will know that Im keeping something f rom him and when hes alone with me I swear to God, he will be annoying and curiou s! Well I said Ill make sure Ill be there to stop him then. And you should take the laid the pink Victorias secret bag in her lap. Or else he will definitely get suspi cious. A few minutes later we drove in to the Cullens garage. I opened the car doo r and prepared to get out but before I even got one leg out of the car, two cold , hard arms grabbed me and lifted me out into a tight hug. Mmmh Bella Edwardss voic e was like velvet. I let his sweet scent overwhelm me as I relaxed in his arms. S o adorable Alice chuckled and I barely noticed her running out of the garage. I w as with my Edward now. I rested my head at his neck. Ive missed you so much love Ed ward breathed into my hair. I started placing small kisses at his neck, and his breathing became harder. I missed you too. I even got food-to-go so that I could eat in the car and get faster home to you. Yea, Im pathetic I said and kissed his neck again. He lifted my chin with his fingertips and looked me straight into th e eyes. Thats my girlfriend youre talking about, you know, be nice. And I think bei ng pathetic is kind of hot. He winked at me, and leaned closer. As always my hear t stopped beating when his lips were close to mine. 30

I closed the distance between them, letting the thrill of Edwards kiss overwhelm me completely. I tangled my fingers in his hair, and wrapped my leg around his w aist. He then let his tongue trace my under lip and I thought that the pleasure it brought me would be my death. And believe me Bella, you are actually not even close to being pathetic if you knew what I was about to do. I was on my way out finding you and bring you back home, and Ive only been home for an hour Well Im goin g with you next time you are hunting then I breathed in his ear. He pulled out of my, well at least thats what I thought it was, tight grab around him and looked me in the eyes: You know thats not going to happen, Bella. God, I ruined our reunion -moment. Edward looked so serious now. Hey mister, I was not done kissing you, dont you dare to pull away from me! I said as I huddled my way back into his cold arm s and chest. Edward couldnt keep the smile from his face at my comment. His lips found mine again and I was back in 7th heaven. I had a hard time getting a grip on myself after that kiss. Thank you I mumbled. Edward laughed quietly to himself. He pointed towards the living room saying: Shall we? I began taking deep breaths, calming myself down. Yea, I want to spend some time with Carlisle and Esme, befo re I have to go home. I said. Oh, but did you not spend time with them after me, E mmett and Jasper left for our hunting trip? he asked. No because your sister dragg ed me out into the car before I even had time to say hello to them, God she was overjoyed, I didnt have a chance I turned to look at his face while I spoke. Edward had raised an eyebrow and he listened intensely as I spoke. Ah! Stupid Bella! N ow his going to wonder even more what me and Alice has been up to all day. This had only made him more curious. I blushed and didnt say one more word until we we re inside the living room. As soon as I stepped inside, Esme was at me side givi ng me a caring, motherly hug. Seconds later Carlisle was at my side as well, put ting a hand on my shoulder: We want apologize for Alices behavior today. And you s hould now that we sent you a lot 31

of compassionate thoughts. Carlisle smiled at me. At least we are glad to see that you survived. Dont blame Alice. She kinds of get caught up in the moment. I dont eve think she is able to control it I send them a kindhearted smile in return. Its rea lly not her fault that she is kind of mental I added. I heard Emmett laugh across the room and I looked at Alice who just sent me a reproving look in return and stuck her tongue out at me. So Edward interrupted Now that we are all together then lets talk about how each others day have been! he said enthusiastically. Alice roll ed her eyes; she already saw were this conversation was heading and so did I. I really didnt have to know the future to figure out Edwards intensions. But Esme, who always loved the opportunity for the whole family to spend quality-time toge ther, was thrilled Yes, thats a wonderful idea Edward! Why dont you start? Oh, well f irst we ran really far, trying to find some grizzlies for Emmett. But there were no grizzlies to be found so after a while we gave up and settled for some mooses . Then Emmett challenged Japser and myself for a fight, but I was too busy think ing about Bella so I really couldnt think about anything else Edward said, smiling tenderly at me. This would probably have melted my heart completely if I didnt k now his intensions behind this conversion. It was clear that he tried to suck up to me. But it still made me blush and I heard Emmett made puking noises. But but but, enough about us! Ive been dying to hear what Alice and Bella has been doing all day? Edward continued eagerly. And he couldnt hide sounding a little impatien t as well. Seriously Edward, why are you making this show? Just read Alices mind a nd get over with it! Rosalie interrupted him. She really looked bored. Edward loo ked irritated as he answered Rosalie sarcastically Thank you so much for that won derful idea Rosalie. But it appears that sweet Alice is blocking her thoughts fo r a reason I simply cant figure out. So I thought that we should talk about it in stead. He now turned back to look at me. Okay how stupid did he really think I wa s? This was starting to irritate me. 32

Edward, everyone has secrets. Every other person than you has to live without kno wing what everyone thinks all the time, so try being in their place for one day. And get used to it; because this is one thing that Alice and I simply wont tell you about. No matter how many ways you try to persuade us into saying it. Its jus t not gonna happen, so you dont have to put on this little family-gathering show any longer, if the only reason was because you wanted to lure out the details of mi ne and Alices day together I saw Alice came dancing across me from the other side of the room, with a big grin on her face. She raised her hand at me, inviting to give her a high-five. I gladly met her request, smiling widely back at her. And BAM, Edward Cullen is out! 1-0 to the human girl and the pixie! You go girls! Emm ett yelled as he laughed and Jasper joined in on the laugh. Soon everyone but Ed ward laughed. He just mumbled: Ill figure it out sooner or later And sure he will bu t he will have to wait until next weekend. I was still so nervous about his reac tion. I blushed again, but no one really noticed, they were too busy laughing, a nd Edward was too busy being irritated. I looked at the time. Oh, I had to go ho me. Or else Charlie would get nervous. Edward, are you too pissed at me to drive me home or can you manage it? I joked with him. I knew that Edward would never le t me walk alone home in the dark. He rolled his eyes, walked over to me and took my hand. I sent a huge grin to my family, because that was truly the way I saw them, and we said our good nights. Edward then practically dragged me out into t he car; I guess he wanted to avoid another team-upagainst-Edward situation. He d idnt say a word to me on the way home, and now I was beginning to get irritated w ith him. He seriously couldnt take this so personal. We arrived at my house. I tu rned to look at him. Edward, please get over with it. Me and Alice can have secre ts without you acting like a baby! I dont want to end this day with you being mad at me I said and looked intensely in his eyes. I really hated when he seemed mad. 33

He took a deep breath and answered: Bella, this is just so frustrating for me! Ok ay, so I have to live with not knowing your thoughts, but now Alice is blocking her mind out as well! He sounded really angry. He didnt even look me in the eyes a s he said it. Yea, she is blocking her thoughts to you about one tiny thing! One thing Edward! You are turning this into something much bigger than it is. I answe red, half-yelling. Now it was my turn to be frustrated. I opened the door and we nt out of the car. He was at my side a few seconds later. Will I see you in my ro om for a few minutes? I asked him. I tried so sound neutral, but I didnt know if h e heard the pleading in my voice. I havent slept without his presence for so long I dont know Bella. Im not really that fun to be around at this moment Ugh! If he was about to be stubborn, well then so would I! I turned around and half ran to the front porch, quickly letting myself in. My heart was beating very fast. And it was not because I was breathless from the running, but it has been a while since me and Edward had been arguing. And Im not sure that Im able to fall asleep witho ut him beside me. Bella? Charlie called from across the living room, watching a ga me. Yea, hi Dad! Listen, Im really exhausted, Ive been out all day with Alice so Im just going to bed early. I promise Ill make some good breakfast for you in the mo rning. Sleep tight, dad! I half-yelled back at him as I went for my room. You too, hon and sweet dreams! Charlie yelled back. Easy for him to say. Without Edward I was definitely not going to have sweet dreams. I quickly brushed my teeth and th row on my pajamas. I huddled in to my bed, pulling the blanket over my head. I a lready missed Edward badly. I wished I didnt yell back at him. I should have plea ded him to stay with me. But he shouldnt have reacted the way he did either. Stub born vampire. I was pretty much caught up in my thoughts when I heard something scratch at the window. I quickly threw the blanket away from m face and looked a t the window. It was all steamy. I could sense a beautiful pale finger outside. It must be Edward. What was he doing? 34

Then I saw it. He was writing in the steam on my window. He wrote Im so sorry and p ainted a heart next to it. I jumped out of the bed and pulled the window wide op en. He was in my room seconds later, and crushed me to his chest, whispering lot s of imsorrys in my ear. My heart relaxed again. I was whole. My Edward was here wi th me and no stupid argue would ever prevent that again. 4. The big night Things were back to normal and I felt like me and Edward never had been arguing. Somehow he just accepted that me and Alice have a secret, and we didnt want to t ell him about it. Okay, so one problem solved. But my nerves were killing me! Mo nday, Tuesday and Wednesday just flew by so fast! And Friday, the beginning day for me and Edwards first weekend totally alone was only two days away. I knew Edw ard could feel that I had a lot on my mind that I didnt tell him about, but after what happened last weekend with me and Alices trip he didnt question my weird beh avior. And it was weird because I didnt like to speak about our weekend together, though; it was the only thing my mind circled about. 35

Whenever Edward asked me what I wanted to do, I just answered with quick sentenc es like I dont know.., you decide or Why dont you figure something out?. And of cou dward would find my lack of interest on the subject weird. Because when he first mentioned the idea for me I was over-the-top happy and enthusiastic about it. B ut yea the nerves were definitely killing me. Get a grip Bella! I kept telling mys elf. Its Edward, your Edward, of course it will be perfect and the best weekend ev er. Even if he doesnt fall for your persuasion tricks, you are going to have a wh ole weekend alone with the most important person in your life. Stop being such a coward and be happy about it! Bella? Edward said, his beautiful voice brining me b ack to present. I looked at him. I knew it upset him that he didnt understand wha t was going on in my mind. But I really couldnt help the nerves. Mmmh? I said I dont know what to do. You have been so quiet the last three days. Too quiet. I dont wa nt to be pushy and you dont have to tell me what youre thinking. But please love, if the thought of us being alone together for the weekend is scarring you, pleas e let me know. We can cancel it immediately. And I wont be mad. I know its a big s tep. We can do it another time if you prefer that? Like there was any way that I would back out on the opportunity to have Edward for myself a whole weekend. I k new I would never do that. Yes I was really nervous and freaked out by our weeke nd. But in the end it wasnt because we were going to be alone, we were alone almost every day. But it was my plans for the night that terrified me. But I would not back out. This is the best opportunity I will ever have to make my wish come tr ue. Oh, I realized I hadnt answered Edward yet, and now he looked really worried. Edward, its not about the weekend. I just have a lota lot on my mind at the moment . Im not going to back out and Im not afraid to be alone with you! Thats the stupid est thing I ever heard. But please, just try to ignore my bad mood. It will chan ge as soon as I have you for myself. I said as I smiled, trying to sound convinci ng. But Bella I cant stand to see you like this. There must be something I can do E dward said, as he stroked my cheek. 36

Being here next to me is the best you can give me in the entire world. Please dont worry about it Edward, I promise.. then the phone rang. Oh, I better answer it I s aid and I ran downstairs. Oh well, at least it was good way to get out the conve rsation with Edward. Because I couldnt be honest with him and it was hard enough dealing with the emotions inside me on top of it all. Hello? I said as I grabbed t he phone. Edward was right behind me. Hi its Jessica! Oh. Hey Jess, whats up? I said. Edward then grabbed my hand and stroked my palm. I signed. Well, Im just wondering if youre still up for tomorrow. Tomorrow? Tomorrow its Thursday. Do I have plans w ith Jess tomorrow? God, how embarrassing I keep forgetting all the other persons in my life when Im spending time with Edward. Bella, youre still there? Jessica ask ed. Oh, yea sorry Jessica. I was just trying to remember what we had planned for tomorrow? Jessica signed. And then she laughed a little. Oh well, it doesnt surpris ed me that it slipped your mind, being around Edward all the time must make your mind pretty occupied she giggled Thats kind of why Im calling now. You, me and Ange la planned on going out for dinner in Port Angeles. Does it ring a bell? she said . She sounded a little impatient as well. Oh, now I remember! We planned that a long time ago. Maybe I should buy a calendar. Oh, sure, yea now I remember. Sure Ill come; I havent seen you and Angela for such a long time. Shall we take my truc k? I answered. Edward looked disapproving at my suggestion. He didnt like my truck , and he truly hated that I was still driving it. I just rolled my eyes at him. B ella, not to say a bad word about your truck, but I think we should take my car if we planned to get there in a decent amount of time. So, Ill pick you up at six ? Jessica said casually. Edward nodded in agreement. He really didnt think much of Jessica, but I think her comment about truck car just gave her some plus-points in Edwardss book. 37

Im choosing to ignore your evil and untrue comment about my truck Jess. So, I gues s Ill see you tomorrow at six. Bye Jess. Cya Bella and then we hung up. Edward was o bviously amused by our conversation. I dont wanna hear another word about my truck I warned him. I wasnt going to say anything he chuckled, and sat down on one of the chairs in the kitchen, pulling me onto his lap. Its nice that you are going to hav e some quality time with Angela and Jessica he said, kissing me in the hair. Mmmh I mumbled. Maybe he thought it would help me get rid of my crabby moodchanging. W ell I could only wish. But I will miss you I said, turning to look him in the eyes . He smiled and I was of course dazzled again. He kissed me on each cheek and my heart started beating faster. Then he kissed me on my forehead, my nose and fin ally his lips made it to mine. It was a very sweet and tender kiss. Ill miss you t oo. But I get to have you all weekend all by myself. That thought will make it b earable to be away from you. Ugh. Now he just reminded me of the weekend again, a nd I stiffened in his arms. Get over it, Bella! I thought to myself as I took Edwa rds hand and went to my room. I woke up in my room Thursday alone. Cant really re member when I did that the last time. But today I kind of liked it. I had to pac k my things for the weekend, and I would be nice to do it without Edward followi ng my every mood. And Edward was out hunting again, he didnt want to feel thirsty at all when he was going to spend all the weekend with me. Not that he was afra id that I would end up at his dinner or anything, but Edward always did whatever he could to be on the safe side. I rubbed my eyes and stretched my body when I felt something at my left hand. It was a piece of folded paper. I unfolded it an d smiled as I saw Edwards perfect writing My night has become a sunny dawn becaus e of you, my Bella. Take care, love it said. I smiled and kissed the note. I look ed outside the window. Oh, it was actually sunny today. Wonderful. 38

Then got out of my bed and went into the shower, taking my time and just enjoyin g the hot water embracing my body. I finished and grabbed my favorite pair of je ans and a dark blue long sleeved shirt. I took the note from the bed and put it in my pocket. I went downstairs to grab some breakfast. Charlie already left for work. Criminals dont take a vacation Bella. And neither will I I heard Charlies voc e inside my head. One time policeman, always a policeman. I chuckled a little an d ate my breakfast. Then I went upstairs, looking for a large bag in some differ ent closets. I found one I could use and began packing for my weekend with Edwar d. I gently laid the lingerie in the bottom of the bag and then placed my pajama s on top of it. Then I packed another pair of jeans, some shirts and some tops. I would wait with my toilet stuff until the next day. Okay so I finished packing a lot faster than I had expected. Hmm, what should I do now? Then a sunbeam cam e across my face from the window as an answer to my question. I grabbed my book W uthering high and a blanket and went outside. Now the sun caressed all of my body . Mmmh. That made me miss Phoenix a little. But the thought of living in a state without Edward was too horrendous to think about, so I decided just to enjoy th e sun while it was here. I lay the blanket out in the backyard and started readi ng in my book. It didnt take long before I just stopped reading and just lay in t he sun, letting my mind wander about the weekend and how beautiful Edward looked in the sun. I miss that sight. And after a lot of thinking I drifted in to slee p again. I woke up because I had chills over my entire body. The sun was all gon e and the steam was beginning to fall. Well perfect, Ive slept such a long time t hat there was no way I would be able to fall asleep early tonight. I took the bl anket and my book and went inside. Jessica and Angela would pick me up in about two hours. Hmm, I have to do something or else I will just miss Edward too much. First of all I should prepare dinner for Charlie, something he just has to heat up in the microwave. I went into the kitchen and opened the fridge. I found a s teak and some potatoes. I prepared the steak and putted the potatoes in the oven . 39

Hey Bella, Im home Charlie said out from the hall. Hi Dad, Im in the kitchen! I answe ed. Mmmh, it smells wonderful in here Bella. But isnt it a bit early for dinner? Ch arlie said as he walked in to the kitchen. Yea but Im going out for dinner with An g and Jess tonight, so I wont be home to make you dinner later. All you have to d o it heat it up when youre hungry I smiled at him. You are treating me too good Char lie smiled back, and then he went into the living room. Okay, so dinner is ready . What can I do now? Hmm, I guess some cleaning wouldnt hurt; after all Im not goi ng to be home the whole weekend. So I started by cleaning the kitchen, the hallw ay, the bathroom and a little cleaning in the living room. I didnt want to distur b Charlie to much while he was watching baseball. I just finished up when the do orbell rang. I went out to open. Angela was standing there, giving me a big smil e. Hi Bella, its so good to see you, Ive missed you! Oh it smells good in here, you already ate? she asked. Hey Ang, I missed you too! No no of course not, Id just ma de sure that Charlie wouldnt go hungry to bed because of his lack of cooking-skil ls I smiled back at her. Ive heard that! Charlie yelled from the living room. Have fu n, girls and take care of each other! Thanks chief Swan! Angela said. Sure Dad! See you in the morning! I replied. Then I grabbed my jacket and went for Jessicas car with Angela. Hi Bella! Jessica said as we got into the car. Hey Jess I smiled at her . Are we ready to get going? Jessica asked. Sure, lets get going Angela responded. 40