DBT Interpersonal Effectiveness worksheet

Expressing your needs and concerns as well as considering other people’s values.

A very common acronym is “DEAR MAN” used to express and communicate your desires and
wishes in an effective manner.

D: (describe): In order to deal with any situation, you first need to describe your concerns
and wants in an effective and nonjudgmental way.

E (Express): Clearly express what you feel and don’t expect others to understand it
automatically.

A (Assert): Assert yourself and don’t state your needs in an assertive way.

R (Reinforce): Reinforce positively people when they respond well to your concerns.

M (Mindful): Keep your focus on the purpose of the discussion and pay attention to it.

A (Appear): Your confidence must be reflected in your body postures and eye contact.

N (Negotiate): Negotiate where it is needed. Know that you cannot have what you want, it is
okay to negotiate so both parties agree.

Other ways to effectively deal with people and improve your interpersonal
relationships are

“Be gentle, learn to accept ‘No” from people.”

“Show people that you are interested in listening to them without interrupting them”

“Validate other people’s thoughts, feelings, and ideas”

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 “Avoid dishonesty, and manipulations and be honest”

“Stick to your values and clearly state them”

“Apologize only when it is necessary. Avoid saying sorry for every little thing”

Write skills that you should learn from this interpersonal effectiveness worksheet.

Reference

Lenz, A. S., Del Conte, G., Hollenbaugh, K. M., & Callendar, K. (2016). Emotional
regulation and interpersonal effectiveness as mechanisms of change for treatment
outcomes within a DBT program for adolescents. Counseling Outcome Research and
Evaluation, 7(2), 73-85.

You can download more Mental Health worksheets here.

Please note: There may be a more up-to-date and editable version of this worksheet available
here which may be more suitable to present to clients if you are a therapist or to use in a
classroom as a teacher or guidance counsellor.

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