LIFE WITHOUT A CHILD: A PHENOMENOLOGICAL

STUDY OF ADULT COUPLES IN QUEZON CITY

A Thesis
Presented to
the Faculty of
Liberal Arts Department
Dr. Carlos S. Lanting College

In Partial Fulfilment
of the Requirements for the Degree
Bachelor of Science in Psychology

QUALITATIVE SAMPLE NO. 1

DECEMBER 2022

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 Chapter 1

THE PROBLEM AND ITS SETTING

Introduction
People choose to be childless for many unheard reasons. It is
important for childless couples to be discovered, to be heard and to be
recognized. Couples who are unable to reproduce are often looked down
by a lot of people due to the expectation that a couple must have a child,
specifically married couples, while others who are child-free by choice are
sometimes stereotyped as being abnormal, despises children, and
prioritizing their own good. It appears that cultural and social expectations
exist regardless of anything an individual chooses in life. Furthermore,
researchers are becoming more interested in terms of identity for both
men and women or couples who became childless for a number of
reasons. It is particularly necessary that childless couples need to be
heard. The majority of women in the society, as well as in other countries,
place a great value on ‘’traditional’’ life approaches, such as earning a
degree and having a good career. Many women have purposefully chosen
to be childless in the past owing to poverty, health complications including
infertility, and negative childhood experiences. As a result, the number of
women without children is increasing, which is attributable to the women
position in our society into becoming more acceptable and expanding.
In the Philippines, when a married couple is unable to conceive due
to infertility, they use different ways. In some cases, childless couples are
simply adopting a child when they are not given the opportunity. This is
due to the fact that majority of Filipino wanted to have a large family.
However, many Filipino couples choose not to have children these days.
Having no child is not common in the Philippines since every couple is
expected to have a child after they get married because some people
expect that their children will soon take care of them as they get older.
These occurrences are one of the reasons why researchers are urged to

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discover why the majority of Filipino couples in this modern age prefer not
to have children.

Purpose of the Study

The purpose of this study is to identify the challenges, coping
methods, and perspectives of childless and child-free adult couples and to
show the significant difference in experiences of those adult couples who
chose not to have children in Quezon City, Philippines. In addition, this
study focuses on the various reasons of adult couples for wanting to live a
child-free life. The results of this study are significant in comprehending
the issues surrounding childlessness and how heterosexual couples deal
with it. Moreover, society will come to respect child-free couples for who
they are as respected members of society.
Furthermore, this study aims to break the cultural and social
expectations that adult couples must have a child in order to be
considered a family. Lastly, it will also serve as an inspiration, additional
data and information for the future researchers.

Research Questions: The Central Question

This study aims to determine a. What is the perspective of childless
adult couples towards family? b. How do childless adult couples feel about
children? c. Did the adult couples who are childless ever experience
emotional invalidation from other people who are against being childless
and child-free? d. Did they feel separated from the majority of couples
from being childless? and lastly, e. What influenced their choice to be
child-free?

Sub-questions
Specifically, this study seeks to answer the following questions:
● What does "family" mean to childless and child-free adult couples?
● What comes to their mind when a childless and child-free adult
couple encounters the word "Children"?
● How did the adult couple feel when they were emotionally
invalidated by those who were against being childless?

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 ● Did the adult couple ever feel as if they were different from other
couples because they decided not to have children?
● Is their decision to become childless and child-free motivated by
their personal life, finances, health, religion, or environment?

Theoretical Lens
Mead's (1937) Symbolic Interactionism Theory is the current
theoretical lens for this study. The symbolic interaction perspective is a
sociological theory that focuses on the symbols that helps to give meaning
to our life experiences in order to understand humans' relationships with
their societies. (Mead, 1937). Identity is the fundamental and micro-level
concept in family studies, according to symbolic interactionism; it includes
the importance of the identity, commitment to the identity, and self-
esteem toward the identity. In family and relationships, symbolic
interactionism is essential. Interactions with a word or event change an
individual's understanding of it. For instance, if a person has a good
relationship with his or her environment, he or she will see things more
positively. However, if an individual's relationship with his or her
environment is not encouraging, the meaning of the word environment
and what it represents change.
Following concepts establishing family or relationship identity,
symbolic interactionism in family studies continues with the concept of
roles. These identities, like social positions and careers, are now used in
accordance with the roles they play. As part of the socialization process,
individuals perform a continuous task of role-taking and role-formation.
This, in turn, leads to interactions, because interactions put the roles of
the individuals into action.
In relevance to this, the researchers use the Symbolic Interaction
Theory in conjunction with in-depth interviews and participant observation
in order to gain a better understanding of the symbolic worlds in which
the research subjects’ lives.

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Scope and Limitation of the Study
The participants in this study are ten (10) selected adult
heterosexual couples from Quezon City, Philippines. This study will seek to
discover the challenges, coping strategies, and viewpoints of the selected
childless adult couples who live in Quezon City. In addition, the
researchers will create interview questions that will be used in order to
collect data and information from the selected adult couples who are
childless and choose to have a child-free life. Lastly, this study is
restricted to heterosexual couples who are currently living in Tandang
Sora, Quezon City.

Definition of Terms
The following are the definition of terms that refer to a detailed
explanation of the technical terms used in the study. In addition, it
provides context for how the researchers will use the concepts or factors
discussed throughout the study.

1. Child-free – A choice of not having children (Browne, 2020).

2. Childless – Someone who does not have any children due to various
circumstances (Browne, 2020).
3. Social Stigmatization – Disapproval or discrimination directed at a
person who does not have a child (Hubley, 2022).
4. Stereotyped – A popular image of a person or an idea that is shared
by many individuals (Neal and Neal, 2021).
5. Phenomenological – The study and description of things as they are
consciously experienced, without regard for beliefs concerning their
causes (Bliss, 2016).

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 Chapter 2

REVIEW OF RELATED LITERATURES AND STUDIES

Related Literature and Studies

Childlessness and being child-free is becoming more and more
normal. With the current social climate, couples have the option to remain
childless with fewer negative reactions from their direct family, neighbors,
and society in general. Although it is becoming more common and
accepted, there are still struggles for couples who decide to go childless.
Multiple countries now face unprecedented population
decline, from developing nations to highly developed countries,
couples all over the world are choosing to remain childless, with
reasons often varying. From economical to biological ones, there is
a plethora of motivations why couples opt to not have children.
Neal and Neal (2021) published an article titled Prevalence and
characteristics of child-free adults in Michigan, USA where they
discussed that the decision to be child-free is not driven by
individual traits, but instead may be driven by other individual or
situational factors. The ability to love and be loved is essential for
humans and can have a big impact on a person's well-being. While
bearing a child is a way for humans to feel fulfillment and love, it is
not the only way. Safety, love, belongingness, and esteem are all
important aspects of a person's holistic well-being according to
Abraham Maslow's (1943) Hierarchy of needs, which mentions that
one cannot achieve the aforementioned needs alone. With sufficient
dedication, this can be fulfilled by their partner, eliminating the
need for offspring. Despite not having children, many couples
perceive themselves as a family regardless of their circumstances
(Cabonce et al., 2019).
There are four recognized theories for voluntary
childlessness: demographic variation, socialization or life course,
neo-classical economic theories, and attitudinal theories. According

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 to these theories, it is possible to claim that there are various
viewpoints on childlessness that

influence why couples or individuals choose to forego having children

(Waren and Pals, 2013). A qualitative study in Ghana titled Infertility and
childlessness: A qualitative study of the experiences of infertile couples,
revealed that childless couples are still stigmatized, and these couples are
refrained from taking on leadership roles in their community (Tabong and
Adongo, 2013). Social stigmatization is significant among couples who are
unable to reproduce, while others who are child-free by choice are also
stereotyped as people who are "individualistic", “abnormal”, or “dislikes”
children. The societal pressure to become a parent and the increase of
pronatalism or the belief that everyone should reproduce measures
today’s individual’s level of worth. Infertility is just one of the reason
couples become childless. Some people are not able to use their own eggs
as their ovaries may have aged prematurely or no longer respond to
fertility medicines. In these circumstances couples or an individual might
consider an egg donor with a partner or donated sperm. These options
can be further discussed with professionals in certain countries who
practices this science based of reproducing (Scagliusi, 2021).
Being child-free has a variety of effects in terms of society,
as well as individual lifestyle and life opportunities. Personal choices
are one of the significant factors influencing the childless lifestyle.
Cain (2013) defined this choice of childlessness as "positively child-
free," implying that some women simply do not believe they are
capable of becoming mothers. One of the strongest social stigmas
in existence is the dislike of children. It is already controversial to
not have children; disliking them is equivalent to murder. Either an
imprudent or a brave woman would publicly admit it. It takes
extraordinary bravery to do it (Cain, 2013). For some couples living
a child-free lifestyle boosts life pleasure, whereas for others, having
children was a personal ambition (Sullano, Antonio and Dimapilis,
2017). Even with the current social climate though, there are still

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 countries, like here in the Philippines, where couples suffer more for
being childless due to cultural norms (Tudy and Gauran-Tudy,
2020). Cultural pressure is palpable in the Philippines and as a
result, pressures couples to have children.

The Philippines is known to be one of the fastest-growing

populations in the world. The population could reach up to 142
million by 2045 (Philippine Statistics Authority, 2015). With that
being said, the cultural expectation for married couples is extremely
high. Many Filipino couples tend to be desperate to have a child.
They even seek professional help just to meet cultural expectations.
According to Cabonce et al. (2019), the Philippines is a recognized
family-centric country. Child-free couples stated that stigmatization
is still relevant within their environment which results in them
applying different stigma management strategies to cope up with it.
In a society that views having children to be synonymous
with a family, childless couples may encounter a unique set of
problems and social pressures (Blackstone, 2016). Women in this
generation prioritize their professions over children and are often
chastised for it. In several countries, including the Philippines,
childlessness is still frowned upon and is considered taboo,
particularly among the older generations (Enriquez, 2020).

Synthesis of the Reviewed Literature and Studies

Over the years, couples have had the option to remain childless and
many countries face unprecedented population decline. Economic factors
such as lack of finances among others are often the main motivations for
couples who opt not to have children in certain societies. Although these
are still common, other motivations such as having no motivation to start
a family aside from child care can also be more appealing to some people
when deciding to remain childless.
Neal and Neal (2021) published an article in which they
discussed the ways in which people justify not having children. They

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found that the decision to be child-free may not be driven by
individual traits, but may instead be influenced by other individual
or situational factors.

On the other hand, Cabonce et al., (2019) state that the

ability to love and be loved is essential for humans, and can have a
big impact on their well-being. While bearing a child is a way for
humans to feel fulfillment and love, it is not the only way. Couples
who choose not to have children tend to endure many changes and
issues. They often struggle with traits such as a lack of satisfaction,
an intense feeling of being empty, or the inability to feel
constrained by economics or time. Despite not having children,
many couples perceive themselves as a family regardless of their
circumstances. Child-free couples are living in a society that values
and encourages having children. It is important that people can
look at this from a broader perspective; society’s views on
parenthood can lead most people to become blind to other
opportunities for personal growth.
Compared to the studies of Neal and Neal and Cabonce,
according to Sullano, Antonio, and Dimapilis (2017) being child-free
has a variety of effects in terms of society, as well as individual
lifestyle and life opportunities. For some couples living child-free
boosts life pleasure, whereas for others, having children was a
personal ambition.
Even with the current social environment, there are still
countries, including the Philippines, wherein couples suffer more for
being childless due to cultural norms (Tudy and Gauran-Tudy,
2020). Cultural pressure is palpable in the Philippines, as a result, it
pressures many couples to have children, whereas having children
is socially expected in different ways depending on the culture.

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Childless couples often face taunts from their peers or family
members if they do not want to conceive a child or if they are
unable to conceive one.
Therefore, based on the literature, regardless of whether or
not to have children is a personal decision that should not be
influenced by peer pressure. The most important is someone’s
personal desire to have children or not and there is nothing to be
ashamed of in their decision to remain childless.

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 Chapter 3
RESEARCH METHODOLOGY

This chapter will present the research design, research locale,

informants, ethical standards, and data collection procedures.

Research Design
This research utilizes Qualitative Phenomenological Research Design
to understand the participants’ lived experiences. The main purpose of
Qualitative Phenomenological Research is to study and understand the
phenomena that have impacted the individual. By means of this,
researchers intend to explore, understand, describe, identify, and access
the needed information from the participants by operating in-depth
interviews with open-ended questions for the participants. Moreover, the
researchers utilize a qualitative phenomenological approach in order to
focus on understanding the participants’ experiences rather than putting
the researchers’ own interpretation because the goal was to see who are
the childless adult couple and how they live in their context. The
researchers aim to listen to the participants' stories in order to make a
careful description of the phenomenon.

Research Locale
The research will be conducted within Quezon City, namely in the
area of Tandang Sora Avenue, wherein the researchers assume that this
area in Quezon City provided the easiest access to the participants needed
for this study. The researchers chose Quezon City because it is one of the
Philippines' most densely populated cities as stated by Philippine Statistics
Authority, 2021. In addition, the researchers observed that, despite being
an urbanized city, numerous people in Quezon City in this modern age are
opting for a life without having children.

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Informants
I. Research Participants

The participants in this study are ten (10) heterosexual adult

couples currently residing in Quezon City who will voluntarily participate
after the researchers have given them informed consent. Those ten (10)
heterosexuals adult couples must be between the ages of twenty-one to
forty-five (21-45) years old, and similarly living together for a minimum of
two (2) years. Equivalently, the qualified participants in this study should
not have any biological or adoptive children, and they should have no
plans to have a child in the future or they are experiencing a difficulty in
conceiving a child.

II. Sampling Technique

The researchers utilize the purposive sampling technique to obtain
the exact data that will be needed in this study. The objective of using
purposive sampling is to look for child-free and childless adult couples who
obtain the criteria needed for this study, such as; (1) they are in a
heterosexual relationship, (2) participants are in the ages between
twenty-one (21) to forty-five (45) years old, (3) and they have been with
their partner for at least two (2) years. Furthermore, the researchers will
interview the participants in this study who can provide thorough and in-
depth information, as well as their own experiences needed for this study.

Ethical Standards
The researchers’ primary responsibility of this study is to protect
the participant's safety, dignity, and rights, as well as to obtain informed
consent, anonymity, and confidentiality, since it is the researcher's
primary obligation and the typical approach in professional ethics
guidelines, it must state the following: (1) The focus of this research is on
childless and child-free heterosexual adult couples in Quezon City, and it
is exclusively for research purposes only. (2) This study will look into the
various circumstances in

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which participants find themselves when it comes to childlessness. (3) Ten
(10) childless or child-free couples are expected to take part in this study
and those participants must be able to communicate using both their
hands and their voices. (4) The researchers will ensure that there are no
known dangers associated with this study, and they will take steps to
ensure that any potential risks or discomforts do not happen to
participants. (5) The decision to participate in this study is entirely
voluntary. If the participant refuses to participate, he or she will not be
denied the treatment, services, or benefits to which he or she is entitled.
Individuals who choose to participate in this study will also be free to
withdraw at any time without consequence. (6) To protect each
participant’s anonymity, all data collected through Google form
registration and during the interview process will be anonymize by using
code-names. No names or other personally identifying information will be
used in the discussion or reporting of the results. (7) Lastly, participants
in this study will have the option to look over or make a copy of the
results for as long as they desire after the study is completed, and it will
be distributed through email or Google Drive.

Data Collection Procedure

I. Permission

Participants in this study will be informed about what participation

in this research entails, such as the topics to be discussed, time
commitment, and data collection processes, as well as any risks and
advantages that may be connected to their participation.
The participant must express their willingness to accomplish what
the researchers have indicated openly. They must indicate that they are
willing to be interviewed for the researcher's topic for a specific amount of
time. Apart from that, participants will be notified that the interview will
be recorded, and they will be given the option by the researchers of
having the interview recorded using a video camera or solely using voice
recording.

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 Lastly, participants in this study will also be informed by the
researchers that their precise words during the interview are needed to be
quoted for the discussion of results.

II. Non-Participant Observation

The researchers will apply non-participant observation while
interviewing the research participants to notice if there are any differences
between their words and actions. During the interview process, the
researchers will employ overt non-participant observation, in which
participants are aware that they are being observed by a researcher but
will not interfere with the interview. The informed images, videos, and
sound recordings of the participants while conducting the interview will be
used as overt non-participant observations. Additionally, the researchers
will utilize covert non-participant participant observation throughout the
interview to observe and document the participants’ body language,
gestures, as well as what the participants are refraining from doing, for
example, ignoring questions or refusing to ask for assistance.

III. Internet and Library Research

Various studies on the internet and in libraries discuss the different
causes why the majority of couples in this generation are now choosing a
life without a child, including upbringing or childhood experiences,
economic and health factors, and the emotional invalidation that childless
couples experience from their environment.

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 Chapter 4
RESULTS AND DISCUSSION

This chapter presents the information gathered from the

participants during the interview process. It elaborates the challenges and
perspectives of heterosexual adult couples who have mutually decided to
become childless and child-free. An overview of the participants profile are
provided, following the presentation of the findings, which was discussed
in the sequence of the study's central and sub-questions.

A. Profile of Participants
The information gathered throughout the interview process
is anonymize by using code-names in order to protect the privacy of each
participant. In the discussion and reporting of the findings, there are no
names or other forms of personally identifiable information included.
Pertinent data were obtained from semi-structured interviews. In addition,
an audit trail was used to analyze the responses, which include
transcription, coding, and themes.
1. Ms. K and Mr. Lando have been childhood sweethearts and
friends for ten (10) years. Mr. Lando works as a customer service
representative, while Ms. K has a part-time job. The couple opted not to
have children because they appreciate having the freedom to pursue their
interests and engage in activities outside of work.
2. Ms. Joy and Mr. Laxon are both forty-three (43) years old. They
have been married for nine (9) years. Mr. Laxon works as a foreman in a
construction company, while Ms. Joy serves as a housewife. Ms. Joy's
health problems have significantly impacted her ability to conceive. The
couple decided not to have children due to both their ages and the notion
that it was already untimely to have a child.

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 3. Ms. Florentino and her partner, Mr. Lucban, were childhood
friends. They have been together for nine (9) years and three (3) months.
Ms. Florentino stated that she has a lot of goals in life and she has no
desire to have a child in order to devote all of her attention in pursuing
her goals.
4. Mr. Omar and Ms. Christine met each other on social media and
they are currently celebrating three (3) years of being together. The
couple's choice to be childless was significantly influenced by Ms.
Christine's relatives and their financial circumstances.
5. Ms. Fanie and her husband, Mr. Romel, have been married for
twelve (12) years and eight (8) months. They both served as a volunteer
for the red cross, where they first met each other. The couple decided not
to have a child due to their childhood experiences and the belief that they
were already old to raise children.
6. Mr. Paul and Ms. Rodelyn currently reside in Tandang Sora,
Quezon City. They have been together for two years and five months. Mr.
Paul has an unspecified job, while Ms. Rodelyn is a twenty-one (21) year-
old college student. Ms. Rodelyn has a firm stance against having children.
Mr. Paul is somewhat uncertain, but he reluctantly agrees with Ms.
Rodelyn's decision. Mr. Paul’s family has a history of health complications
in regards to pregnancy which affected his decision into not having
children as he fears that his partner might also suffer from similar
conditions.
7. Ms. Geng and Mr. Zian met at a church gathering and have been
together for two (2) years and three (3) months. According to Ms. Geng,
Mr. Zian experienced a difficult childhood and was raised in a
dysfunctional family, which influenced the couple's decision to live a
childless life.
8. Ms. Ly, who is twenty-two (22) years old, and Mr. X, who is
twenty-seven (27) years old, have been dating for three (3) years and
one (1) month. Ms. Ly is firmly opposed to having children. The childhood

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experiences they encountered are the primary reason they opted not to
have children.

9. The relationship between Mr. Garang and Ms. J started in high

school, and they have now been married for five years. One of the
reasons why the couple opted to live a childless life is because of their
childhood experiences. Being the provider of the family, Ms. J preferred to
take care of her siblings rather than having child.
10. Ms. Kaye and Mr. Joe met on Twitter and have been dating for
three years due to common interests. The couple's decision to be childless
derives from the idea that they must prioritize their focus on their
individuality, their shared set of goals, and the awareness that parenthood
is a responsibility that needs thorough consideration.

B. Perspective towards Family

Majority of the participants have the same perspective about
“Family”. Most of them have a positive outlook on the word “Family”. As
mentioned by Mr. Joe and Mr. Lando about family, “Yung people who
supports you in every aspects of your life. Through the lows and highs of
your life, yung sabihin na nating in sickness and health, and of course
yung failures and success sa life mo, yung mga taong sumusuporta sayo
sa mga ganong bagay.’’ (Mr. Joe)

“Yung family hindi siya nalilimit lang sa blood ties since pwede
kayong maging family ng ano... kahit hindi completely related sa inyo.
Pwedeng friends ganon.... Hindi- ‘di lang siya basta kung sinong relative
or something.’’ (Mr. Lando)

The statements imply that family has no limits. Individuals can be

called "family" although they are not bloodily related. This indicates that
those are the people who support other people in every aspect of life. The
word "family" has a lot of definitions, as Ms. Rodelyn stated, "Yan yung
relationship na di mo made-define kung ano talaga siya..."

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 Being childless and child-free does not necessarily mean it cannot
be referred to as family. As mentioned by Mr. Paul and Mr. Joe, “Di
naman siya required sa family na kailangan may anak. Pwede naman
anak niyo is aso or- hamster or anything basta pets matatawag naman
kayong family diba.” (Mr. Paul)
“Pamilya is all about suport naman and not just about having a
children.” (Mr. Joe.)
This shows that childless and child-free couples have a different
definition of family than most people do. Family does not limit the
participants in having children. It can be in different forms: friends, pets,
etc. A child is not a requirement to be called a family. Most informants
believe that family is all about commitment and being one as a couple.

C. Perspective towards Children

For most participants, children are viewed as a responsibility. They
thought that if they do not have the ability or lack the capacity to raise a
child, creating one is unnecessary. Children are a lifetime responsibility;
most informants define children as a sort of responsibility that they must
invest time and attention as well as great amounts of resources in order
to fulfill their needs, as stated by Ms. Florentino, “Kapag bata or anak
parang responsibilidad. Alagain siya na kailangan ah... ginawa mo na tong
isang bagay na to na meron kang ng anak at pang habang buhay mo na
siyang responsibilidad.’’
“Kapag kasi sinabi ng anak papasok agad sa isip mo yung
responsibilidad.. malaking responsibilidad.’’ (Mr. Joe)

While most of them see children as a huge responsibility, some

view children in a different light, as expressed by Mr. Lando who views
children in general as an annoyance, he stated, “Para sa akin kasi, hindi
ko talaga gusto yung mga bata.. As in… ‘pag nakikita ko sila parang ano
na-bbwisit ako ganon. Kasi ‘di ko naranasan maging ganon noong bata
ako, ‘di ko naranasan yung pagiging makulit or maingay. Parang siguro
nadala ko yung parang resentment na ‘yon hanggang ngayon sa mga bata
na nakaranas ng ganon.”, in contrast to other couples who view children

17
as a responsibility. Mr. Lando’s past experiences also affected his views of
children in general. This is a common theme for childless couples with one
or both persons suffering from past traumatic experiences during
childhood.
Ms. Ly also shares the same sentiment saying that “Magulo. Kasi
meron akong pamangkin na dalawa, dalawang babae. So, ako kasi ang
nag-aalaga no’n.’’ Seeing children as a chore instead, having first-hand
experience on how hard it is to raise a child was another example of
having past experiences affecting their views on opting to have children.
There are some who sees children in a neutral way as Ms. Joy
stated, “Wala lang, natutuwa lang kami. Minsan hinihiram pa nga namin
eh, ‘di ba. Wala lang.. wala naman kaming bata eh.’’, implying a sort of
indifference towards children. Furthermore, Mr. Garang views children in a
neutral way but see them in a positive light and stating that, ‘’Ahh.. yon
pag naririnig ko ang salitang bata, naiisip ko agad ang kalayaan dahil ang
mga bata ay.. ano malaya silang gawin mga gusto nila, malaya silang
maging masaya malungkot o ano mang gusto nilang gawin malayang-
malaya sila.’’
Most couples tend to share similar sentiments towards children
referring to them as a responsibility related to an unnecessary job that
they must work on. This view often defines their general mindset towards
opting for being childless and child-free contrary to most traditional
couples seeing children as a blessing.

D. Perception of Public
The majority of childless couples experience continuous invalidation
from the people in their environment as a result of their choice to lead
child-free lives. Most adult couples claimed that other people, even their
own relatives, questioned their choice and reminded them that having a
child will be beneficial in the future since it will take care of them as they
age.

As Ms. Fanie mentioned, ‘’Oo may mga nagsasabi na bakit pa kayo nag
aasawa? bakit pa kayo nagsama kung wala kayong anak? Yung negative

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na parang inaano ka na bakit pa kayo nag sasama? na wala naman
kayong anak? useless yung.. useless ang pagiging mag asawa niyo kung
wala rin kayong anak.’’
‘’Lagi kaming di pinaniniwalaan. Sinasabi nila, “sa ngayon lang yan,
ngayon niyo lang iniisip yan, pero in the end, gugustuhin niyo rin kasi
‘pag tumanda kayo eventually sino ang mag aalaga sa inyo?” (Ms. Geng).

Having a child is culturally ingrained among Filipinos, who view the

child as a symbol of what it means to be a family. As demonstrated by Ms.
Christine's response to the query, ‘’if there are no children, can it still be
referred to as a family?’’. Her response was, ‘’Hindi. Kasi walang anak eh.
Hindi pa rin matatawag na pamilya, kasi ang pamilya binubuo nung may
anak.’’
It is still a common belief among Filipinos that children's
responsibility is to pay off their parents for any work or sacrifices that the
parents have made on behalf of their child. As stated by Mr. Lando,
‘’Ingrained na rin sa tradition na ano ‘pag magkaka-anak ka sila mag-
aalaga sayo.’’ This emotional invalidation creates a firmer resolve among
them to be child-free. Ms. Ly herself expressed this by saying, ‘’Yung
nanay ko parang ‘di naniniwala. Kasi parang impossible raw na ‘di ako
magkaroon ng anak… ‘di ko pa nakikita na magkaka-anak ako. Hindi ko
talaga siya gusto.’’ This indicates that, in an environment where childless
couples are seen as safe, there are still tendencies toward invalidation.
Couples find it unsettling and challenging to feel invalidated.
Hearing derogatory remarks from other people about their decision to live
a childless and child-free life has an impact on them. As Ms. Joy opened
up, ‘’Naririnig ko sa kanila, “wag niyo na interview-hin yan si Joy kasi wala
naman anak yan eh”, wala lang, ‘di na lang ako kumikibo, ‘di ko na lang
sinasabayan pero sinasabi ko kay tito mo (Mr. Laxon) masakit sa ‘kin.’’

On the other hand, despite being invalidated, it will not matter

whatever people might say towards their choices in life. As expressed by
Ms. Kaye, ‘’Di naman nag mamatter yung sasabihin nila eh kasi buhay ko

19
naman ito, ako naman nag decide na hindi ako mag-aanak, so anong say
nila buhay ko? wala naman silang ambag sa buhay ko.’’

E. Being Child-free and Childless Couples

In expressing life as a childless and child-free couple, most couples
do not believe their decision to have a childless and child-free life
distinguished them from other relationships. As claimed by Mr. Lando, ‘’Di
naman kailangan ng anak para maturing na kayo na family, and besides
meron din naman kaming pets… tinuturing ko na rin silang child din
technically kahit ‘di siya actual na bata ganon.’’ Furthermore, one of the
similarities they have in their responses is that they are aware that there
are several married couples who do not intend to have children but still
live happily and contentedly with each other. Another response they have
in common is that they believe they are incapable of carrying out the
responsibility of raising a child. As stated by Ms. Florentino, ‘’Hindi naman
kasi halos mga friend ko din mga kaibigan ko din ganun din na wala pang
balak (to have a child) kasi ‘di pa, ‘di pa kaya yung responsibilidad kaya
hindi kami naturing na iba.’’

‘’Hindi naman namin naramdaman na iba kami. ‘Pag married ka

kasi parang kontento ka sa presence ng asawa mo, both yon sa’min.’’
(Ms. Geng)

‘’Hindi naman.. eh kasi kapag lumalabas kami ng asawa ko.. ng

misis ko sa mall, park, sa simbahan, nakikita ko ibang couples mag-asawa
wala silang kasama anak. Masaya silang nagmamahalan sa isa't isa…
ganun din nararamdaman namin kaya parang wala kaming
nararamdaman na kakaiba.’’ (Mr. Garang)

Contrarily, some couples' notion that they are different from other
couples derives from the generally held belief that having children is the
primary priority for the majority of couples. As mentioned by Ms. Ly, ‘’Oo,
feel ko na iba kami kasi di namin naging priority ang pagkakaroon ng
anak. Kasi di ba sa mag partner priority ang pagkakaroon ng anak para

20
habang bata pa nakakapag-alaga ka na. Para pagtanda mo malaki na ang
anak mo.’’
Nevertheless, couples who feel different from other relationships do
not permit this feeling of distinctiveness from other relationships to persist
for long. Thus, these childless and child-free couples place a higher value
on their own lives, happiness, and contentment with one another than
they value the need to raise a child.
‘’Siguro ang naramdaman naming iba is that ahh.. we are free, free
from responsibility.’’ (Mr. Joe)
‘’Hindi ko iniisip yung ibang tao eh.. ang iniisip ko kami (Mr.
Romel).. maging masaya kami, hindi kami nangingialam sa kanila.
Masaya kami eh, ‘di mo naman kailangan ng talagang anak kung ‘di mo
naman kayang gampanan ‘di ba… okay na sa ‘min na walang anak.’’ (Ms.
Fanie)

F. The Influences of their choice as being Childless and Child-

free
In accordance with the responses of the informants as to why they
chose to be childless and child-free, the majority of them are prompted by
childhood experiences they encountered. From the perspective of adult
couples who cultivated an idea of being child-free, Ms. Garang and Ms.
Geng shared their decision-building of their partner that led them to be
certain in being childless.
“Misis ko ay nagkaroon ng trauma dahil nung bata pa sila, siguro
mga 8 years old pa lang siya or 10 na? yung mga kapatid niya at siya
iniwan ang pamilya ni tatay at nanay.’’ (Mr. Garang)
‘’Magulo kasi yung family niya (Mr. Zian). Factor din yon sa’min na
kailangan namin i-consider kasi hindi pwedeng maulit…
Kaya hanggang maaari iniiwasan namin yung naging experience nila
magkakapatid. Kasi mahirap, kahit siya aaminin niya mahirap. Kaya ako
naiintindihan ko kasi alam ko yung feeling na wala kang ama. Mahirap
yung part na yon.’’ (Ms. Geng)
This implies and supports the idea that the majority of childhood
couples experience unpleasant upbringing. Additionally, it demonstrates

21
that they are concerned that if they have not fully recovered from their
upsetting childhood experience, they will unconsciously pass their trauma
on to the child and be unable to uphold their parenting responsibilities.
Another factor that influences their decision to be childless is due to
their future and goals. Most couples prioritize their careers and are more
focused on building an empire rather than having a child. As per Mr.
Lando, ‘’Mas pinipili lang namin i-pursue yung goals namin… mas
maganda yung buhay ng walang anak since walang ibang responsibilidad
ganon. Pwede kang mag focus sa goals, sa dreams, ‘yun, sa sarili.’’ This
demonstrates that the couple places value on responsibility and personal
development, wherein the accomplishment of their goals and a better
future are their main priority. Childless and child-free couples are aware of
the major responsibility that comes with parenting and they believe that
parents have responsibilities to children as well as to society. As
mentioned by Ms. Geng, “…Ang pag aanak kasi talaga malaking
responsibility siya. Kumbaga kung kailangan mo maging hands on para
alagaan yung bata, gagawin mo.”
Lastly, the informants reveal that finances and environment are the
other factors that greatly affect their decision to forgo having children. In
a third-world country where making a living is challenging, couples at the
present time are pondering if they will be able to provide financial support
for children, evidence of this was stated by Ms. Kaye and Ms. Rodelyn,
‘’Madali kasi mag anak, ang hindi madali yung mag ra-raise ka ng
bata sa ganitong estado ng buhay na sobrang hirap, andito na
nararanasan natin inflation ngayon.’’ (Ms. Kaye)

‘’Mahirap nga din yung buhay lalo na sa Pilipinas sobrang daming

ano.. demand so kawawa lang talaga yung ano (child).’’ (Ms. Rodelyn)

These responses illustrate the thought that went into not having
children. Being childless and child-free is not an impulsive decision, in
fact, it is carefully considered due to numerous factors.

22
 Chapter 5
SUMMARY OF FINDINGS, CONCLUSIONS AND RECOMMENDATIONS

This chapter provides a summary of the findings and conclusions

derived from the study, which aimed to identify the challenges, coping
methods, and perspectives of childless and child-free adult couples in
Quezon City, Philippines, as well as to demonstrate the significant
difference in experiences of those adult couples who chose not to have
children. Additionally, it provides recommendations that can be pursued
by childless and child-free couples, community, government, and future
researchers.

Summary of Findings
The findings of the study were summarized according to the central
questions. The majority of childless couples had the same perspective
towards "Family." Most of them have a positive outlook towards the term
"Family." According to informants, a family has no boundaries. Individuals
who are not blood related can be referred to as "family." This implied that
family members were those who help others in all aspects of their lives.
According to Childless and Child-free couples, being childless or child-free
did not preclude them from being called a family. They have a different
definition of family than most people. Family does not necessarily refer to
children for the majority of participants. This can be in various forms,
including friends, pets, and so forth. A child was not required to be

23
referred as a family. The majority of participants believed that family is all
about commitment and being one as a couple.
Children were viewed as a responsibility by the majority of the
participants. They explained that if they do not have the ability or capacity
to raise a child, having one was not a requirement. This implied that even
if couples will have a child, a child has their own lives and responsibilities,
and taking care of their parents is not part of their responsibility.
Additionally, they defined children as a type of responsibility as they must

invest time, attention, and significant amounts of resources in order to

meet their needs. While the majority of them have seen children as a
huge responsibility, some could see them as an annoyance in contrast to
other couples who see children as a responsibility. This was a common
theme among childless couples, with one or both members suffering from
traumatic childhood experiences. Most of them had similar sentiments
regarding children. For them, children were a responsibility related to an
unnecessary task that they must work on. In contrast to most traditional
couples, who see children as a blessing, this view frequently defined their
general mindset toward choosing to be childless.
The majority of them revealed that they were experiencing
invalidation from the public, as they decided to live child-free or childless,
and hearing derogatory remarks from other people about their decision
has an impact on them. The findings also indicated that even their own
relatives have questioned their decision and repeatedly reminded them
that they needed a child to help them in the future. The common belief
among Filipinos is that it is the obligation of children to repay their
parents for any sacrifices made on their behalf.
On top of that, most childless and child-free couples did not believe
that their decision does not distinguish them from other couples. They
claimed that not having children did not preclude them from being
referred to as a family. On the contrary, there are also couples who felt
that they were different from other couples. Thus, they were still firm on

24
their personal choice of being child-free and childless. Their priority was
each others happiness and contentment.
Moreover, the couples were influenced by a variety of factors.
Primarily, their unpleasant upbringing had made them certain of their
decision to be childless and child-free. Furthermore, most of them are
prioritizing their careers and building their own empires over having
children. Additionally, some of them revealed that their financial and
present situation were some of the factors that lead them to be childless.
These influences demonstrated that being childless was not an impulsive
decision.

In summary, the responses of the participants illustrated how

childless and child-free couples were influenced by a variety of factors.
Primarily, their unpleasant upbringing has made them certain of their
decision to be childless. Children were viewed as a responsibility by the
majority of childless couples. They explained that if they did not have the
ability or capacity to raise a child, having one was unnecessary. As stated
in the article of (Sullano, Antonio and Dimapilis, 2017), for some couples
living a child-free lifestyle boosts life pleasure, whereas for others, having
children was a personal ambition. The majority of adult childless couples
revealed that they are experiencing invalidation from the public. Hearing
derogatory remarks from other people about their decision to live a
childless life has an impact on them. As implied in the study of (Enriquez,
2020), in several countries, including the Philippines, childlessness is still
frowned upon and is considered taboo, particularly among the older
generations. Additionally, as stated by (Enriquez, 2020), the idea that a
woman can have a child-free existence is still considered taboo in the
country, particularly among older generations. Lastly, the evidence of an
increasing millennial across the globe now choosing to be childless.
Studies show declining birth rates in the age bracket of millennial and
Generation Z (Tagupa, 2019).

Conclusions

25
 Based on the indicated findings, the study had shown a childless
and child-free life was not an impulsive decision for couples; it was not an
option that they chose arbitrarily. It was a valid concern that should be
addressed with the utmost consideration for the couple. The lifestyles of
heterosexual couples who have chosen to forgo having children were
revealed insight-fully. This was been demonstrated that despite having
different upbringings and life experiences, childless and child-free adult
couples held similar perspectives on family and children. It was revealed
that a couple can be regarded as a family even in the absence of children
if they were satisfied and committed to their relationship.

The couple's decision to forgo having children was impacted by a

variety of factors, such as their perspectives towards family and children,
as well as the general public's perception. Nevertheless, the couple's
personal experiences, past trauma, future aspirations, economic and
health factors, and a decision made by the couple were the main factors
that influence them to refrain from having children, considering the
benefits to their current situation. Lastly, despite social expectations for
several heterosexual adult couples in Quezon City, the option of not
raising a child existed.

Recommendations
This study revealed that childless and child-free couples constantly
encounter criticism from their relatives and friends, as well as from the
general public. The emotional invalidation and criticism that participants
experienced in their social environment were demonstrated through this
study. Therefore, family members or friends of childless and child-free
couples could learn from this study about the perspective and acceptance
that the couples need from their social environment in order to gradually
reduce the invalidation of the choice of couples. In addition, the
community may benefit from this study by having a greater understanding
of how a couple makes decisions, which could lead to society accepting
and normalizing the couple's decision to forgo having children.

26
 The government has the ability to influence the general public, and
the findings of this study can be used to raise public awareness about
childless and child-free couples. The government could educate the public
that living without children is completely acceptable. Moreover, the
government is encouraged to establish a program about being childless
and child-free in densely populated areas which also addresses sex
education and family planning to reduce at least the continuing increase in
the number of people or children who will only suffer in the future.
Future researchers could further improve and extend the study not
only to a certain area in Quezon City but also to the entire city.

To accomplish this, future researchers are encouraged to gather more

information and enhance this study by being persistent in conducting
interviews and reliable in accomplishing their assigned tasks to obtain a
good understanding of the main goal of this study. In addition, the
acceptance of homosexual couples in society is growing as a result of
living in the modern period. Thus, future researchers could broaden the
scope of the study and include homosexual couples who also do not intend
to have children, as they are also respected members of the community.

27
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APPENDICES

A. Transcription
TRANSCRIPT CODES THEM

WHAT DOES THE TERM ‘’FAMILY’’ MEAN TO YOU? Family Famil

‘’Ah, para sa akin kasi, yung family hindi siya nalilimit lang sa Team
blood ties since pwede kayong maging family ng ano.. kahit
hindi completely related sa inyo. Pwedeng friends ganon. Hindi- Suppo
‘di lang siya basta kung sinong relative or something. Ayun.’’
(Mr. Lando)

‘’Yung pamilya kasi dapat nag mahahalan yan eh, ‘di ba. Kung Mahal mo
mahal mo ang asawa mo syempre mahal mo rin anak mo, ‘di Child
ba. Kaso lang pano kung wala pa kayong? (Child) Mag
mamahalan na lang din kami (Mr. Laxon). Kami na lang din
mag-alagaan dalawa ganon na lang yun. Kasi sinabihan ko na
siya eh.. “Paano kung hindi na ako magka anak, paano kung
hindi na tayo magka anak?”, “Edi hahanap na lang ako ng..
mag aampon na lang ako ng nurse” Sabi niya (Mr. Laxon), oo
mag aampon nalang ako ng nurse. “Siraulo ka pala eh”
gumanon ako sa kanya, sinampal ko natawa naman,
nagtatawanan lang naman kami pagka.. pag tungkol sa mga
ganyan. Kasi ‘di naman namin binabangit yung mga tulad ng
baby, ‘di nalang namin binabangit sa isa’t-isa yung susumbatan
ka na “‘di ka kasi magka anak kasi mataba ka” hindi. Hindi ako
sinusumbatan, oo naiintindihan niya kasi mataba ako eh. Dati

31
‘di naman ako ganun kataba lumobo nang lumobo ng dahil din
sa kanya kasi magaling din siya mag alaga. Ganon, ‘di ba. Alam
ni thea yan.’’ (Ms. Joy)

‘’Yung pamilya ‘di lang siya matatawag na sabihin mo pamilya

mo. Yung pamilya yung magsisilbing sandalan mo kapag may
problema ka yung matutulungan ka kapag kailangan mo Sandalan
ganun.’’ (Ms. Florentino)

‘’Uhm para sa akin ano, ang pamilya is ano binubuo siya ng

may ama, may ina, may anak, ‘yun. Kasi hindi siya mabubuong Partners
pamilya (if the couple is childless)’’ (Ms. Christine) ‘’Parang
ganon na rin yung paniniwala ko. Ang tawag pa lang sa amin
ay mag partner. Partners pa lang.’’ (Mr. Omar)

‘’Para sakin ang salitang pamilya is binubuo yan ng ano, ng

pagmamahal sa kapwa. Pwede mo sabihin kapamilya mo ah..
hindi mo kadugo, pwede mong masabing kapamilya mo kahit Kapwa
hindi mo kadugo, pwede rin kahit kadugo mo pero hindi naman Kapamilya
i-turing naman sayo eh kapamilya. Yun ang ah.. ano sa ‘kin
meaning sakin ng kapamilya. Hindi nasusukat yan sa
kakayahan ng ah.. blood kundi paano mo mahalin ang kapwa
mo, pwede mo siyang maging ‘turing na kapamilya.’’ (Ms.
Fanie)

‘’Pamilya? de dapat ano walang iwanan, tulong tulong. Tapos di

iniiwan yung anak. Ganun lang.’’ (Mr. Paul) ‘’Sakin naman yung
family, masyado siyang malalim like ano siya yung pwede mo Love-hate
siya parang dun na yung ano pinaka the best word na made-
describe siya is love-hate. Minsan mahal mo siya minsan galit
ka sa kanya ganon. Kasi di mo ano eh.. kumbaga yan yung
relationship na di mo made-define kung ano talaga siya. Yung
family para sayo yun lang and I thank you charot.’’ (Ms.
Rodelyn)

‘’Yung family, siguro sa’min yun yung mga tao na united sila by
marriage and blood.’’ (Ms. Geng)

‘’Para sa ’kin, syempre yung may anak at magandang bahay. United

Tapos may malakas na foundation ng pagmamahal. Di ba
usually naman ganoon ang pamilya. Pero sa’kin sapat na yung
mag partners na nagmamahalan para matawag na pamilya.’’ Foundation
(Ms. Ly)

‘’Ahh.. ang pamilya, ay dito mo mararanasan ang mga

kadamay sa mga hirap, ginhawa, ahhm.. sa problema at ito rin
ang masasandigan mo kapag nahihirapan kana sa buhay, Kadamay
ayon.’’ (Mr. Garang)

‘’Ah well for me, yung pamilya para sakin yung people who

32
supports you in every aspects of your life. Through the lows
and highs of your life, yung sabihin na nating in sickness and
health, and of course yung failures and success sa life mo, Support
yung mga taong sumusuporta sayo sa mga ganong bagay.. so,
that.. thats whats family means to me.’’ (Mr. Joe) ‘’For me
kasi.. Family ano eh yung ano yung mga tao nakakaintindi sayo
katulad nga rin ng sabi nya yung nag susuport din sayo sa
kung ano mang gusto mo, yung mga taong nakakaintindi din
sayo kasi ang family hindi lang naman yan sa kadugo eh
makikita mo rin sya sa mga nakapaligid sayo sa mga kaibigan Support
mo.’’ (Ms. Kaye) Nakakaintindi

IF THERE ARE NO CHILDREN, CAN IT STILL BE REFERRED TO Family Love

AS FAMILY?
Suppo
‘’Uuhm, absolutely. Kasi ano, ayun nga, hindi naman siya na
lilimit yung pagiging family niyo sa blood ties. Kung wala
kayong anak, still, pwede kayong ma-consider na family or
ayun. Kasi para sa akin lang, parang hindi required yung
magka-anak para maturing kayong family ng ano, ng isang tao
ganon.’’ (Mr. Lando) Nagmamaha-
lan

‘’Oo, kasi nag sasama naman kami (Mr. Laxon) kahit wala
kaming anak nagmamahalan naman kami sa loob bahay.
Pwede naman kami mag kuha ng bata dyan sa tabi tabi, pwede
ka naman mag ampon kung gugustuhin niyo na talaga, ‘di ba.
Pero parang sa isip pala kasi namin kung.. kung sa population
natin ngayon andami ng nagugutom na hindi kaya ng
magulang dahil sa sweldo. Eh Lalo na kung lalaki lang ang
nagt-trabaho kulang pa rin. Ano ‘di ba, lalo na may anak ka
baby nag-gagatas, nag diaper oh.. hindi naman, ‘di naman sa
ayaw namin magka anak, kaya namin. Kaya lang yung sweldo
lang ng mister ko sinasakto lang namin kasi syempre alam mo
na na mga mahal bilihin- bilihin ngayon, kuryente, ilaw. Pero
kaya, bakit hindi kaya? sinusubukan pa rin namin ‘yan kaso
lang mataba nga ko eh.. ‘di nga. ‘Di na talaga eh sayang eh 43
na ang edad ko oh.’’ (Ms. Joy)
Nag
‘’Oo naman, matatawag pa rin siyang pamilya kasi ano pa rin tutulungan
eh parang grupo pa rin kayo nag tutulungan.’’ (Ms. Florentino)

‘’Hindi. Kasi walang anak eh. Hindi pa rin matatawag na Kasal

pamilya, kasi ang pamilya binubuo nung may anak.’’ (Ms.
Christine) ‘’Tyaka hindi pa kasal.’’ (Mr. Omar)

‘’Oo naman, kasi ang pamilya naman eh.. ‘di lang nasusukat sa Love
anak eh. Pwede mo maging kapamilya hindi mo kaano ano, ‘di Kapamilya
mo kadugo. Mag alaga ng ibang tao na hindi mo kadugo

33
kapamilya yon. Maituturing mong kapamilya basta may.. may
love na nagbubuklod sa inyo pwede mo siyang masabing
kapamilya.’’ (Ms. F)

‘’Yes yes yes yes.’’ (Mr. Paul) ‘’Para pano mo nasa- ano para Not required
sakin oo kasi di naman kasi hindi kasi siya req- di naman siya
required sa family na

kailangan may anak. Pwede naman anak niyo is aso or-

hamster or anything basta pets matatawag naman kayong
family diba. Ano yun eh nasa iba na kasi tayong generation
ngayon kung dati nalilito kasi ako kung ano eh generation z or
millenial z ako ganon. Oo Nilalanggam na ba kayo oh wag kayo
mag alala.’’ (Ms. Rodelyn)

‘’Sa’kin yes, kasi magiging selfish ako kung sasabihin ko na Marriage

may family na di sila able magkaroon ng child pero hindi ko sila
matatawag na family. Kasi once na married ka na, considered
na siya as family na kahit dalawa lang kayo magkasama.’’ (Ms.
Geng)
Iisa
‘’Oo naman, kasi di ba usually naman kahit ang mga
transgender kahit walang anak nag sasama pa rin sila ng
masaya. Kahit wala kayong anak pwede pa rin kayong
matawag na pamilya kasi pwede pa rin naman kayo tumira sa
iisang bahay kahit walang anak.’’ (Ms. Ly)

‘’Ahmm no.. halimbawa kami wala kaming anak, pero masasabi Nagmamaha-
namin na.. masasabi namin na relasyon namin na isang lan
pamilya kasi nagmamahalan kami. Don, don don.. doon mo
makikita ang ibig sabihin ng pamilya. May dalawang taong
nagmamahalan at ayon doon mo matatawag na isa ang
pamilya.’’ (Mr. Garang)

‘’Oo naman para sakin ahh kagaya na rin ng sabi namin kanina, Support
pamilya is all about suport naman and not just about having a
children.’’ (Mr. Joe) ‘’Oo naman, kasi hindi lang naman katulad
ng.. Sabi ko kanina hindi lang naman sa kadugo mo nakikita
yung pamilya, nasa taong nakapaligid sayo sa taong
nagmamahal sayo sa mga taong nakasupporta sayo tsaka sa
mga nakakaintindi sayo.’’ (Ms. Kaye)
HAVE YOU EVER EXPERIENCED EMOTIONAL INVALIDATION Invali
BECAUSE OTHERS DISCOVERED YOU DO NOT INTEND TO Tradition ted
HAVE CHILDREN?
Exhau
‘’Uhm, sa akin personally, ano, hindi naman sa disagree yung
parents ko pero ano, parang magkaiba lang kami ng view, kasi ting
si mama kasi parang gusto niya magka-apo pero ayaw-ayoko
naman, parang ayoko mag-anak, pero ‘di naman niya- parang
‘di naman niya tinataboy yung desicion ko. Parang nirerespect
pa rin niya pero magka-iba lang kami ng views. Uum, since

34
buhay ko naman. Parang binigay niya lang sa akin yung parang
opinion niya pero ‘yun, ako pa rin magd-decide. Ah, sa kanya
(Ms. K) naman kasi, yung mother niya as in disagree sa
decision niya, parang ano, di-’di maisip nung mother niya yung
magkaroon ng partner na walang anak. Parang ayaw- ayaw na
ayaw niya (mother) yung idea ng hindi pagiging ano, pagiging
childless ba ganon kasi para sa kanya raw, masarap daw
magka-anak ganon. Oo, ayun yung parang- siguro ingrained na
rin sa tradition na ano ‘pag magkaka-anak ka sila mag-aalaga
sayo parang ganon. Ayon. ‘’ (Mr. Lando)

‘’Nung una bago lang kami dito. Sabi nila, ‘’whoo!’’ ‘di naman- Nasasaktan
hindi ‘wag niyo na kasi- may meron mga pumupunta dito mga
ayu-ayuda, mga nagtatangap ng mga ayuda, “bat ba
magtatangap ng ayuda yan si Joy eh wala naman yang anak ‘di
ba, dapat dyan yung may mga anak lang binibigyan” yun
naririnig ko sa kanila, “wag niyo na interviewhin yan si Joy kasi
wala naman anak yan eh”, wala lang, ‘di na lang ako kumikibo,
‘di ko na lang sinasabayan pero sinasabi ko kay tito mo (Mr.
Laxon) masakit sa ‘kin. Nasasaktan talaga dahil syempre asawa
mo ginaganon ka, iniisip ng mga tao baog asawa mo, parehas
kaming

may diperensya ganon, pero si tito mo, ‘di naman. Kaya

sinasabi ko sa kanila, ‘di baog yung asawa ko, ako lang may
problema at mataba nga ‘ko, ‘yun. Kaya yung asawa ko ‘di ako-
‘di ako sinusumbatan, ako pa nga nanunumbat eh, “pakain ka
nang pakain sa akin kaya yan lumulobo tuloy ako.’’ (Ms. Joy)

‘’May naniniwala naman kasi sa panahon ngayon hindi dapat Napakahirap

kailangan mag de-desisyon ka na magkaroon ng anak
napakahirap ng buhay kaya ganun din sila ganun din na f-feel
nila kasi ah.. magkano ang presyo ng bigas? Yung sobrang
dami kasi ng kailangan munang isipin na pagkakagastusan
kesa sa pagdala ng pamilya niyo.’’ (Ms. Florentino)

‘’Wala naman.’’ (Mr. Omar) ‘’Merong nagtatanong tapos ang

ano nila, ‘’bakit wala pa?’’ (child) ganon. Ano hindi pa namin Mahirap
balak kasi mahirap mag-anak ngayon kasi nga ngayon
pandemic tapos ano syempre maano yung, kapag nakabuo Wala naman
kami maano yung bata, ‘yun bang- ano tawag dito? Yung
parang wala pa kaming gaanong mai-aano (To give support) sa
kanya (Child).’’ (Ms. Christine)

‘’Oo may mga nagsasabi na bakit pa kayo nag aasawa? bakit

pa kayo nagsama kung wala kayong anak? Bakit.. bakit pa
kayo.. May mga negative meron din namang positive. Pwede
mong.. kung ano ang iniisip ng ibang tao pwede mo ilagay sa Negative
sarili mong negative, pwede mo rin i-positive din, ganon ‘yon.
Yung negative na parang inaano ka na bakit pa kayo nag Useless
sasama? na wala naman kayong anak? useless yung.. useless

35
ang pagiging mag asawa niyo kung wala rin kayong anak. Kaso Oo may mga
para sa ‘kin ‘di yun ang ano yun eh, hindi ‘yun (child) ang nagsasabi
kumbaga ang sukatan ng pagmamahalan niyo mag asawa. May
anak nga kayo ‘di

niyo naman magampanan ang pagiging magulang ninyo,

useless ang magkaroon kayo ng anak. So mas maganda kung
wala kang anak, kung ‘di rin naman kaya panindigan pagiging
magulang mo ganun lang simple lang, ‘di ba?’’ (Ms. Fanie)

‘’Di yung una talaga.. hindi yung una talaga gusto ko (have a
child).. parang di naman kayo siguro mga bata diba? Yung una
gusto ko ng.. yun loob, sa loob (sexual intercourse) kaso na
gets ko yung mga pinagsasabi niya yung mga sama ng loob
niya yung.. basta na gets ko hanggang sa yun, onti onti mga
ilang- mga ilang months yun na, napatunayan niya lahat
(reason for choosing a child-free life) na summary naman niya
okay naman pasado sa ano panlasa ng panel, okay naman. Gusto ko
Ayoko na.’’ (Mr. Paul) ‘’Kasi ano saming dalawa magka iba kasi
kami ng belief kasi siya ano siya pro pro tama no?’’ (Ms. Nakakatakot
Rodelyn) ‘’Oo non pro.’’ (Mr. Paul) ‘’Tapos ako.. anong non pro?
parang gus- pro life siya, ako naman ano non kumbaga sabi ko
ano di rin ako.. di rin hindi naman ako tutol sa abortion tsaka
hindi rin di naman kumbaga ayoko talaga magkaroon ng anak
kahit na may- lagi kong inoopen sa parents ko kahit sino dito
sinabi ko ayoko talaga magka anak kasi sa.. sa lahat ng paligid
na na meron ako tsaka yung mga nakikita natin ngayon na
teenage pregnancy, parang lagi.. marami din ako friends na
maagang nabuntis at age 15 17 18 19 20 ganyan laging
sinasabi sakin na mahirap maging ina so parang araw araw
tumatatak sa isip ko ay nakakatakot maging ina. Kasi nai-na..
na aano mo rin siya eh nakikita mo rin sa sariling mong nanay
diba gano yung kahirap sila maging nanay parang mo- 24/7
nanay talaga sila wala silang pahinga.’’ (Ms. Rodelyn) ‘’2
minutes na.’’ (Mr. Paul) ‘’Che.. ano parang ano kumabaga
nakakatakot. Pano pa kaya sakin

nangyari yun parang di ko kakayanin kasi iba iba tayo ng ano

diba ng nararamdaman, maaring sayo madali lang pangangak
sakin hindi, maaring madali sa kanila manganak diba ganon
pero sakin alam ko na sa sarili ko di ko siya kaya, yeah ganon..
kurutin kita dyan eh, ayun.’’ (Ms. Rodelyn)

‘’Yes, most of the time. Lagi kaming di pinaniniwalaan. Sinasabi

nila, “sa ngayon lang yan, ngayon niyo lang iniisip yan, pero in
the end, gugustuhin niyo rin kasi ‘pag tumanda kayo eventually
sino ang mag aalaga sa inyo?” Pero sa’min kasi hindi yon ang
purpose ng child. Kung ikaw ay magiging magulang. Ang view
kasi ng mga tao sa bata is responsibility niya ang magulang
niya pag tanda. No, hindi ganon ang bata, ang bata ay
responsibilidad ng magulang hanggang pag laki at walang

36
responsibilidad ang bata sa magulang niya hanggang sa
pagtanda. Kung tutulungan ng anak ang magulang niya it is
out of love and yun ang lahat ng yon ay out of sincerity lang
walang obligasyon na tinatanaw. Sa ’min okay lang, kasi Yes most of
personal naman naming decision yon at kami ang magdadala the time
noon hanggang huli. So, kahit ano namang isipin ng tao okay
lang naman sa’min. As long as, kaming mag-asawa (Mr. Zian) Di
ay sure kami sa desisyon namin, Okay lang.’’ (Ms. Geng) pinaniniwa-
laan

‘’Ako, naka experience ako sa partner ko. Sinabi ko kasi sa

kanya (Mr. X) na parang wala sa desisyon ko ang magka-anak.
Kasi ‘yon nga yung maranasan kong mag-alaga. Kaya feeling
ko mararanasan ko ulit yon, yung hirap pag nanganak ako.
Kaya sinabi ko sa kanya na ayokong mag anak. Noong una
ayaw niyang pumayag kasi gusto niya yung mag aanak kami
tapos magtratrabaho siya.

Tapos ‘yong may mag-aalaga sa’min ‘pag matanda na kami.

Pwede naman kaming kumuha ng katulong. Yung nanay ko
parang di naniniwala. Kasi parang impossible raw na di ako
magkaroon ng anak. Kasi wala pa naman siyang anak na di pa
nagkakaroon ng anak. Ako pa lang ang nagsabi sa kanya na
ayaw kong magka-anak. Parang normal lang naman ‘yon. Kasi
sabi nila sa ngayon lang naman daw nasasabi kasi bata pa
kami. Pero para sa’kin di ko pa nakikita na magkaka-anak ako. Naka
Hindi ko talaga siya gusto. Sabi ko nga sa partner ko kung experience
magkaka-anak man kami gusto ko ‘yong wala na kong ako sa
gagawin. Ayoko nang maranasan yung pinagdaanan ko na pag- partner ko
aalaga sa mga pamangkin ko. Gusto ko kaya na naming
kumuha ng katulong o mag-aalaga sa anak namin. Kaya Ayaw
naming mag provide para sa pangangailangan ng baby namin.’’
(Ms. Ly) Yung nanay
ko
‘’Ahh.. syempre dahil sa desisyon namin, madami nagtataka
kung bakit ayaw naming magkaanak. Eh ang sabi nila masarap
daw magkaroon ng anak may pamamaraan. Ang desisyon na
asawa ko (Ms. J), ayaw niyang magkaanak kaya nirerespeto ko
nalang din ang kanyang desisyon at sa ganun ayoko na rin
mag-anak.’’ (Mr. Garang)

‘’Ako oo, lalo nung sa work kasi na kwento ko na wala akong

plan mag anak, after ko sabihin yun, sabi nila na eh paano ka
pag tumanda ka sinong mag-aalaga sayo? Sino mga kasama
mo? Ayun. Parang hindi naman.. ang anak kasi hindi naman
yan ano.. hindi naman yan.. anong tawag dito? Hindi naman
ang.. siya investment. Kasi ang isip kasi ng mga pilipino kapag
sinabing anak kailangan hanggang pagtanda ng magulang is
kasama ka nila. Parang yung syempre oo tinatanaw mong yung
utang na loob yung ano.. yung.. yung ano buhay mo sa kanila
pero hindi naman ibig sabihin non na kailangan buong buhay Marami

37
mo din sa kanila (parent) mo lang din isspend, sa kanila mo nagtataka
lang igugugolin.’’ (Ms. Kaye) ‘’Yeah.. Yeah, I agree sa sinabi
nya na, parang ano kasi eh, once they hear you say na ‘’I dont
plan on having a children’’, parang sasabihin nila na bakit? I
mean who is going to take care of you pag nagkasakit ka?
ahh.. Diba kaya nga tayo nagtatrabaho ngayon para pag
dumating na tayo sa panahon na yon is we have enough Oo lalo nung
income to support ourselves so ahh.. so dapat talaga, I mean sa work
ahh.. ewan ko di na siguro maalis yun sa mga pilipino, pero
ahh.. hopefully ahh.. hopefully mawala na yung stigmatism Ayaw
(stigmatization) yung ganun na invalidate yung feelings ng
couple just because they don't want to have a children.’’ (Mr. Desisyon
Joe) ‘’Ako wala (she does not care on opinion of others) kasi di
naman nag mamatter yung sasabihin nila eh kasi buhay ko
naman ito ako naman nag decide na hindi ako mag-aanak so
anong say nila buhay ko, wala naman silang ambag sa buhay
ko.’’ (Ms. Kaye) ‘’Well she's true, ahh.. I mean wala naman
dapat tayong pake sa iisipin nila kasi unang una hindi naman Mag-aalaga
sila yung sumusuporta sa kung ano mang life style yung gusto
nating patakbuhin sa buhay natin, so ahh wala nalang care , as Stigmatism
long as masaya naman kami sa takbo ng buhay namin.’’ (Mr.
Joe)
HAVE YOU EVER FELT THAT YOU ARE DIFFERENT FROM OTHER Unstr
COUPLES BECAUSE OF YOUR DECISION TO LIVE A CHILD-FREE
LIFE? ge

‘’Ah, so-sa akin parang hindi naman. Parang ‘di naman ‘ba- iba Hindi naman Happi
yung ano pagiging- pagsasama namin compared sa mga mag-
partners na may anak since ayun nga, ‘di naman kailangan ng Hindi ness
anak para maturing na kayo na family, and besides meron din kailangan ng
naman kaming pets ganon so, feel ko para sa akin, parang anak
tinuturing ko na rin silang child din technically kahit ‘di siya
actual na bata ganon. Ah, meron kaming isang hamster, then
bumili kami netong recently ng dalawang love birds, and
meron din kaming ano, dalawang pusa sa bahay.’’ (Mr. Lando)

‘’Ah, hindi naman. Di naman parang parehas kasi, mas.. oo

andun na yung naiingit ka kasi may anak sila sabi nila. Pero
nakikini-kinita ko lang din ang ano, eh ang ang hirap maging
magulang diba. Kahit mga magulang niyo, tanungin niyo kung
bakit sila (struggling). Oo di naman natin kasalanan na
ipinanganak tayo sa ibabaw ng mundo, pero sa populasyon
natin ngayon na mabigat na ang mundo kailangan pa ba yun? Hindi naman
Kung pupunta ka nga sa paseko ang daming bata oh diba ang
daming bata dun na naghihirap, di alam kung pano mag aaral. Mahirap
Yung iba anim ang anak walang trabaho ang magulang diba. Eh maging
ako naman huminto ako sa trabaho ko kasi asawa ko kasi di magulang
maasikaso sa bahay. Walang nag aasikaso eh, syempre hihinto
nalang ako sa trabaho ko kasi aasikasuhin ko asawa ko na
pagdating niya kakain na lang siya, magpapahinga ganon. Kaya
di parang parehas lang di ko iniinda yung mga ganyan, wala

38
akong anong ganyan na selos selos ganyan. Siguraduhin mo
maganda ako dyan ah. (video)’’ (Ms. Joy)

‘’Hindi naman kasi halos mga friend ko din mga kaibigan ko din
ganun din na wala pang balak (to have a child) kasi di pa, di pa
kaya yung responsibilidad kaya hindi kami naturing na iba. Ano
wait lang ano nga? Masaya kasi meron pa kong mga bagay na
kailangan gawin eh di pa.. di pa siya.. wala pa sa isip ko na
ganyan mag aanak, mag aasawa, magpapamilya hindi pa eh.
Kaya ano muna di ko siya ginugusto pa, ganun din naman yung
partner ko (Mr. Lukban).’’ (Ms. Florentino)

‘’Hindi naman.’’ (Ms. Christine) ‘’Hindi naman, parang natural

lang. Parang wala lang din naman. Napadali ba ang buhay dahil
walang anak? Siguro oo, kasi kaya pa naming bilhin yung mga
gusto naming bibilhin. Wala pang inaalagaan tyaka nakakatulog
pa nang maayos kasi sabi nila kapag may bata raw marami Hindi naman
kang iniisip, mapupuyat ka na raw.’’ (Mr. Omar)
Masaya
‘’Para sa ‘kin eh.. hindi ko, hindi ko iniisip yung ibang tao eh..
ang iniisip ko kami (Mr. Romel).. maging masaya kami hindi
kami nangingialam sa kanila. Kami kung.. masaya kami eh, ‘di
mo naman kailangan ng talagang anak kung ‘di mo naman
kayang gampanan ‘di ba. Okay na sakin ang.. okay na sa ‘min
na walang anak para sa ‘kin ha. Kasi naranasan ko na mag
alaga ng mga bata eh, magpalaki.. pero.. oo mga pamangkin
ko, kumbaga lumaki na sila sa akin eh. Kapag tumanda ako,
meron at merong mag aalaga sa akin. Hindi mo man anak or
ibang tao man ‘yan, ‘pag marunong kang makisama, mayroon Hindi naman
at mayroong mag aalaga sa ‘yo. Yung sinasabi nila na ‘’paano
‘pag tumanda ka wala kang anak?, walang mag aalaga sa ‘yo.’’ Natural
hindi ‘yun eh, kung may anak ka nga ‘di ka rin naman kayang
alagaan, merong mga ganun eh. Halimbawa yung anak mo,
may mga professional, malayo sa ‘yo, may kanya kanyang
pamilya, ‘di ka rin nyan ma-alagaan eh, kasi iisipin nila ang
pamilya nila, so hahanap ‘yan ng mag aalaga sa ‘yo. So ano
pa.. useless (Bearing a child). Okay lang naman kung may
anak ka, okay lang din naman wala, pero ang naging desisyon
mo eh.. bukod sa wala ka nang kakayahan mag anak or hindi
mo kayang panindigan bilang magulang, magkaroon ng anak.. Hindi
okay na ‘yun, wala kang anak. Para sa ‘kin ha. Kanya-kanya
tayo eh. Hindi siya la.. hindi siya hadlang na wala kang anak Okay lang
kasi masaya kayo. Oo (They are happy that they are doing
what they want without having a child). May.. may time na
sasabihin mo sana nagka-anak.. sana nag anak tayo pero
napagdesisyonan niyo na walang anak. Okay lang kasi, ah..
nagkatuwang kayo eh, masaya kayo eh, ‘yun naman ang
importante eh, ah.. may kakapitan kayo sa isa’t isa, kumbaga
kumakapit kayo sa isa’t isa, na pinagkasunduan niyo yan eh,
na wala kayong anak. okay lang masaya naman eh. Oo (They
can focus on themselves without having a child) oo okay lang

39
naman kasi na.. naiisip ko rin yan eh, na okay lang na ‘di na
lang tayo magka anak, kasi bukod sa medyo may edad na
tayo, may edad kami, ‘di na rin namin magagampanan ng
hundred percent na maibibigay namin sa anak namin ‘di ba,
kaya maswerte rin yung.. kung magkaka anak ka lang din
naman yung bata pa. Bata ka pa mag desisyon ka mag ka
anak, ‘wag mong hintayin tumanda ka, pero kailangan alam mo
kung paano mo panindigan pagiging magulang mo, ‘di ba.’’
(Ms. Fanie)

‘’Panong iba? ah okay para sakin oo parang oo kakaiba nga

kami kasi parang minsan kasi nag ano nag bu-bugbugan kami
nag aasaran saming dalawa ako talaga malakas trip siya lagi
yung trip ko. Parang ano lang Go with the flow lang kasi di lang
sa

parehas din kaming nakaranas ng past na panloloko ganyan

kumbaga parang sa dinadamidami na nakaharap namin na red
flag sa isat isa namin yung green flag ganon.’’ (Ms. Rodelyn)
‘’Di nabudol talaga ako.’’ (Mr. Paul) ‘’Anong nabudol? nabudol
daw yun? ayun nga parang iba.. iba sa ano kumbaga.. lahat
yung masasabi kong parang perfect ewan ko sa iba para sakin
perfect. Perfect siya kasi ano di kami nag s-set ng time na uy
wag mong gawin to ganyan kasi ganyan parang ganun
hinahayaan ko kung magloloko ka go kung hindi edi hindi,
ganun choice mo sa lahat ng gagawin ng isat isa kailangan
wala kaming aanno i tawag dito?’’ (Ms. Rodelyn) ‘’Secret.’’ (Mr.
Paul) ‘’ Anong secret ano tawag dun? ipagbabawal kasi choice
naman.. choice niya naman yun, wala ng.. wala ka nang hawak Kakaiba
dun ganun. Kumbaga yung number one talaga namin sa isat
isa is yung respeto tsaka kontento.’’ (Ms. Rodelyn)
Panloloko
‘’Hindi naman namin naramdaman na iba kami. ‘Pag married ka
kasi parang kontento ka sa presence ng asawa mo, both yon
sa’min. I mean, God’s will na kasi yon kung binigyan ka ng
anak. Pero for now, mas okay na kuntento ka lang kung ano
meron ngayon sa inyo. Actually, yung husband ko gusto niyang
mag anak pero hindi ngayon, hindi niya pa nakikita ngayon.
Ako, hindi ko talaga nakikitang mag anak.’’ (Ms. Geng)

‘’Oo, feel ko na iba kami kasi di namin naging priority ang

pagkakaroon ng anak. Kasi di ba sa mag partner priority ang
pagkakaroon ng anak para habang bata pa nakakapag-alaga ka
na. Para pagtanda mo malaki na ang anak mo. Pero para sa
’kin naiiba ako kasi ‘di ko talaga gusto (child). Kahit sa edad ko Hindi naman
ngayon na 20 plus. Gusto ko pagtapos ko mag-aral, gusto ko
magwowork ako. Parang ieenjoy ko ang buhay. Minsan, parang Kontento
gusto rin naming yung kulit at ingay ng bata. Pero okay lang
talaga na wala kaming anak. Di naman naaapektuhan yung
pang araw-araw namin.’’ (Ms. Ly)

40
‘’Ahhm Hindi naman.. eh kasi kapag lumalabas kami ng asawa
ko.. ng misis ko sa mall, park, sa simbahan, nakikita ko ibang Naiiba
couples mag-asawa wala silang kasama anak. Pero nagiging
masaya sila dahil magkasama sila. Masaya silang
nagmamahalan sa isa't isa kaya masaya sila, ganun din
nararamdaman namin kaya parang wala kaming
nararamdaman na kakaiba.’’ (Mr. Garang)

‘’Ahh.. Hindi naman siguro nararamdaman ng iba, siguro ang

naramdaman naming iba is that ahh.. we are free, free from Hindi naman
responsibility. I think that’s it.. yung yung difference na Masaya
naramdaman namin and ano ba yung pakiramdam ng walang
anak? yun nga walang responsibilidad, and then what we only
have to think about is ourselves and what you want to do for
the next coming years, ano yung plan namin na kaming dalawa
lang yung, walang additional responsibility.’’ (Mr. Joe) ‘’Ako
siguro ang naramdaman ko lang is ano eh.. hindi paano ko ba
sasabihin.. same lang ng happiness din kasi alam mo yung iba
yung happiness na na-eexperience namin habang wala kaming Free
anak. Tsaka iba rin naman yung experience ng couples sa may Happiness
anak. Siyempre mag iba naman yung definition natin ng
happiness di lang naman sa anak nakukuha.’’ (Ms. Kaye)

WHY DID YOU TWO DECIDE NOT TO HAVE CHILDREN? Child-

hood
‘’Uhm.. ayun nga kasi dala na rin siguro nung ano bad Bad expe-
childhood. Lalo na sa side nung partner ko since ayun nga, Childhood rience
mula noong pagkabata niya ano, naranasan niya ng mag-paano
magpalaki ng ibang magka- ng mga kapatid since siya yung Finan
panganay sa kanila. Maaga niyang naranasan yung hirap ng
buhay paano magpalaki ng pamilya ganon. So tingin ko ano, Futur
ayaw niya ng maranasan ulit ‘yon or kung sakali parang ayaw
niyang iparanas sa magiging anak niya ganon if ever. Ayon.’’ Goals
(Mr. Lando)

‘’Parang parehas lang din kami. Tinangap nalang namin

parehas. Wala naman. Wala namang nagsasabi ako pa nga Hirap
nagsasabi sa kanya na “hirap magka anak kasi ang gastos sa
pagbili ng gatas tsaka diaper” oh yun lang.’’ (Ms. Joy)

‘’Yung una kasi di pa nakuha yung pangarap eh. Ako gusto ko Pangarap
pa mag teacher kahit graduate nako ng college ngayon gusto
ko mag teacher so mag aaral ulit ako. Tapos yung partner ko Luho
(Mr. Lukban) naman ang focus din kasi niya ngayon mag
review para pumasa maging pulis ganon kaya ang expect
naman non babawi sa magulang kaya di pa talaga wala pa
talaga ayun yung parang uh naging dahilan kung bakit di pa
namin naisipan magkaroon ng pamilya. Bukod sa pangarap,
pamilya. Kasi yung gusto sa buhay yung mga luho ganon.’’
(Ms. Florentino)

41
‘’Hmm.. Kasi mas mauuna pa namin yung ano, yung pag iipon Pag iipon
para sa future. Kung sakali man magkaroon, ano mayroon-
mayroon kaming maibibigay sa kanya kung anong kailangan Future
niya ganon.’’ (Ms. Christine)

‘’Masaya na kami na walang anak, okay na samin na..

pagpasiyahan namin yun, kasi bukod sa hindi kaya ng financial, Masaya
ah.. hindi ka.. hindi ka sure sa financial or pag nag ka anak ka
kasi ‘di mo alam kung ah.. pano mo gagastusan yung Hindi Kaya
panganganak, kasi ‘di naman basta-basta eh, ‘di basta basta..
ang gagastusin mo kasi dyan, ‘di lang basta magka anak ka
tama na eh.. hindi eh.. gagampanan mo ‘yan bilang magulang,
kahit malalaki na ‘yan or may sarili ng pamilya nandun pa rin
pagiging magulang mo niyan eh.. hindi lang dahil nagka anak
ka dahil gusto mo lang magkaroon ng mag aalaga sayo, hindi
ganon eh.. So kung ganon ang mindset mo, ‘wag ka mag anak,
sarilinin mo na lang, kung ‘di mo rin lang kayang panindigan
ang pagiging magulang mo, ‘wag ka na mag anak or hindi ka
sure na magagampanan mo ang pagiging ah.. magulang mo.
Kasi ang salitang magulang dalawa yan eh, ibig sabihin ng
magulang eh. Pwedeng magulang na magulang talaga eh, ‘di
ba. May magulang na magulang.. may dalawang meaning yang
magulang eh.. pwede.. pwede maging magulang ka eh bukod
sa pagiging parent mo, magulang ka na magulang na
magulang (Greedy), ‘di ba. May mga ganun eh.. basta.. yung
magulang kasi.. dalawa yan eh.. may magulang, alam mo yung
ibig sabihin ng magulang? ‘di ba? Mayroong magulang na
parents or father (Parent figure), meron ding.. oo ‘yun ang
magulang nag take advantage ka, kumbaga mapagsamantala
ka, or oo.. mapagsamantala ka kasi magulang ka (Greedy),
‘yun. Dalawa ‘yun eh, isang magulang na magulang (Greedy),
yung.. halimbawa ikaw may anak ka, yung i-aasa mo yung
sarili mo sa anak mo na hindi naman obligasyon ng anak.. sa
‘yo. Ikaw bilang magulang may obligasyon ka sa anak mo, pero
nasa anak mo yan kung baba- i-babalik sa ‘yo ang pagiging
(Repaying your parents sacrifices).. ah.. anong tawag dito?
yung.. halimbawa ginampanan mo yung pagiging magulang mo
sa kanya, or kung bibigyan niya ng halaga ‘yun, pwede niya
ibalik sa ‘yo. Viceversa.. choice ng magiging anak mo ‘yun. So
bilang.. oo hindi required (Repaying your parent's sacrifices),
pero kung ikaw eh magulang ka.. mahirap eh.. kasi ikaw maliit
ka- may edad ka na, kagaya ko may edad na ‘ko, hindi ko na
one hundred percent na ma-ibibigay ang pag aalaga sa anak.
Parang ganon. Parang iniisip ko rin sa sarili ko na, okay na sa
‘kin na walang anak kasi ‘di ko rin naman maibibigay ng
hundred percent eh.. ano pa ang pagiging magulang ko?
anong.. useless ang pagiging magulang ko kung hindi ko
ibibigay ang hundred percent, ‘di ba? Okay ‘yun ‘di ba?’’ (Ms. F)

‘’Kasi ano sakin naman reason..’’ (Ms. Rodelyn) ‘’Mahal ang

gatas.’’ (Mr. Paul) ‘’Ma- oo yun isa rin yun mahal yung gatas,

42
isa rin yan ano.. nagtataas yung bigas lahat lahat ng mga
bilihin, kasi parang kumbaga kung ano.. kung ngayon parang di
pa namin- ano pa yung sarili namin di namin kaya buhayin,
what if gagawa pa kami ng bubuhayin namin edi pano na diba? Mahal
edi kawawa lang kung gagawa pa kami ng bubuhayin eh sarili
namin di namin kaya mabuhay.’’ (Ms. Rodelyn)

‘’Katulad nga ng sinabi ko kanina, kasi it is both happiness and

responsibility. Hindi lang ako ang may responsibility sa anak ko
pero may responsibility ako sa community. Kasi ako ang
magpapalaki sa anak ko and eventually ang pag mold ko sa
kanya hanggang pag tanda niya ‘yon ang magiging result ng
pagkatao niya at gano’n ang magiging behavior niya sa
community. So, kung di ko siya na palaki nang maayos, di ko Happiness
nagawa ang responsibilidad ko. Magiging harm siya sa
community. At iyon ang responsibility ko bilang ina at pag di ko Responsibility
yon na gampanan, parang malaking impact yon sa’kin.
Malaking pagkukulang ‘yon sa’kin.’’ (Ms. Geng)

‘’Kasi hindi pa sapat yung pera. Kasi yung partner ko kasi nag-
sisideline lang siya sa Lazada. Tapos ako syempre nag-aaral
pa. Kaya di pa gano’n kalaki ang sahod naming mag-asawa
para makabuhay ng mga bata.’’ (Ms. Ly)

‘’Ahh yon nga, gaya ng sinabi kong isyu ng misis ko ay

nagkaroon ng trauma dahil nung bata pa sila, siguro mga 8
years old pa lang siya or 10 na? yung mga kapatid niya at siya
iniwan ang pamilya ni tatay at nanay.. iniwan.. ngayon na Hindi sapat
naging responsable sa pagiging magulang ng mga maliliit na yung pera
bata mga maliliit niyang kapatid ay siya, kaya nahirapan siya
magkaroon- mamuhay noon, sinakripisyo niya (Ms. J) yung
pagiging bata niya para sa mga nakababata niyang kapatid.’’
(Mr. Garang)

‘’Ano ba ahh.. unang-una kasi naming naisip “mutual” and how Trauma
the economy going right now, we don't want to raise a
children, and uhmm.. paano ba.. malaking responsibilidad yung
ano eh.. pagkakaroon ng anak eh, i mean right now we are
handling ourselves as an adult, pano pa kaya pag nag handle
kami ng bata diba? so ayun.’’ (Mr. Joe) ‘’Ayun nga di naman
kami tumatakas sa responsibility, pero parang ganun na nga
charot.’’ (Ms. Kaye) ‘’Sorry mag bbutt in lang ako, di naman Responsibili-
tayo tumatakas sa responsibility, kasi if we really if want to, we dad
can ano naman.. we can provide naman diba, we have jobs,
stable jobs, pero kasi uhmm.. it’s like we don't want to want to Economy
bring a child na ano.. na ano ba to? papalakihin namin and we
are going to be responsible with how it’s going to be as a
human being.’’ (Mr. Joe)
WHO OR WHAT INFLUENCES YOU AS A COUPLE TO LIVE A Child-
CHILD-FREE LIFE? hood
expe-

43
‘’Wala naman masyado kasi financially kaya naman namin mag Goals rience
buhay ng bata kung gugustuhin namin since parehas kaming
may trabaho then ayon, feel ko ano, parang mas pinipili lang Sarili Futur
namin i-pursue yung goals namin, then ayon, mas maganda
yung buhay ng walang anak since walang ibang responsibilidad Goals
ganon. Pwede kang mag focus sa goals, sa dreams, ‘yun, sa
sarili yeah.’’ (Mr. Lando) Respo
-bility
‘’Ah mahalin niyo yung isa’t-isa ganun lang yun. Mahal niya ko
di niya di niya ko pinababayaan sa kain, siya rin naman, di ko Hirap din Finan
siya pinababayaan sa mga bagay na di na niya paghihirapan sa mag alaga ng
loob ng bahay. Parang kaming dalawa ay natutulungan nalang bata Enviro
nag aalagaan ganon. Parang dalawang matanda ba ganon ment
ganon. Di na makakagawa ng anak mag uusap nalang sila sa Nanawa ako
gabi parang ganyan lang.. Ah, kasi ano eh parang hindi naman sa sobrang
sa na ano, nako sa bata kasi yaya ako eh tatlo na inalagaan ko kakulitan
since maliliit pa, since na nasa sa tyan pa hinihintay ko na lang
lumabas ako na nagpalaki. Althea reign pangalan nung una eh Mataba ako
panganay. Althea reign yung unang panganay na inaalagaan
ko. Ang hirap din mag alaga ng bata rin kaya baby pa, nako Mabilis
ang hirap mag alaga ng baby lalo na pag nagkakasakit di mo hingalin
alam kung anong masakit sa kanila. Okay lang sana kung
malalaki na kasi nagsasalita na yan, “sakit ng ulo ko, sakit ng
tyan ko”, ganon diba. Hindi eh, pag baby hindi mo pa ma-
anuhan eh iiyak lang sila kung ano yung masakit sa kanila di
mo malaman kung anong aanuhin (give) mo sa kanila. Yung
panganay yung, panganay nung iniwanan ko yon nasa month-
5 years na. Tapos yung pangalawa 2 years old lang iniwan ko.
Tapos bumalik na naman ako kasi kinuha na naman ako kasi
nanganak na.. manganganak na naman daw kasi nga ako lang
ang pinagkakatiwalaan nila pag ano.. pagbantay sa baby. Ako
nanaman naghawak iniwan ko nanaman siya 2 years old,
huminto nako sa kanila nung 2 years old na. Pwede na niya
isa-isama ng magulang yung anak nila. Pero ang hirap sobra.
Oo 21 years old ako non nung nag alaga ako sa panganay.
Kung suma-sumahin total mo yun mga nasa sampung taon na
pero ang sahod ko nun mababa lang, may 5, 3 thousand, 2
thousand. Eh syempre ako nakikisama na lang din ako kasi
bukod sa kapitbahay namin kaibigan ko pa. Oo libre naman
lahat libre naman siya (food) lahat hindi.. hindi ako naumay sa
pag alaga ng bata, kundi na-nawa lang ako sobrang kalikutan
malikot eh..katulad ko mataba na ako, mataba ako
nakakahingal mag alaga ng bata. Na-immune ako nyan nung
nagpunta ako ng boracay beh, Dyos ko, dala ko bag, dala ko
bata yung lalakarin mo simula dito hanggang palengke,
pagkakain ka alas sais na gutom ka pa. Oo (exhausting) kaya
naano rin ako syempre naintindihan ko rin naman yun ano rin
naman parang ko na rin naman yung anak.. oo para ko na ring
mga anak mga inalagaan ko. Kasi nasasaktan din ako pag
pinapalo sila nung tatay binabato ng libro pag ‘di sila umayos
sa pag aaral nila nasasaktan din ako eh kasi para ko narin

44
silang anak. Anak ko na rin sila sa puso pero ‘di galing sakin Sinubukan
ganun yun. Oh nasagot ko na ba lahat ng tanong niyo? Kunwari Natunaw
kayo di kayo magka anak, ay relax lang and Diyos naman
magbibigay niyan di naman talaga tayo e. ang diyos kapag ang
diyos ang nagbigay ng ganyan, mahalin mo na. Kung talagang
para sayo, para sayo. Kung di para sayo, okay lang tanggapin
na lang ganon. Kung talagang hindi na kayo mag kaka anak eh
tanggap ganun talaga yun lang yun e. Wala nang sumbatan
kasi nandito na tayo eh ilang taon na tayo mag asawa. Jusko
ilang taon nako nag asawa kay tito mo 36 tito mo 35 oh san ka
pa maghahabol ka pa ng last trip ng train oh wala na.
Sinubukan na namin ng isang beses di ako dinatnan ng 3
buwan na, natunaw natunaw lang kasi sa sobrang katabaan ko.
Oo nagpa ano pa nga ako eh nag pa ano tawag dito nag pa
ultrasound pa ko wala talagang nakita niya eh natunaw siya
ang sakit, sabi ko nag ano rin ako parang na dismaya rin ako
nun kasi di alam paano sasabihin kay tito mo kasi nga ganun
nga nangyari hanggang sa sinabi ko kay tito mo na ganon.
Niyaya ko siya sa ob gyne hinarap ko siya dun sa pag anuhan
ng ultrasound. Nakaharap si tito mo ‘’nasaan yung baby dun?’’,
di naman (she did not cry) na dismaya lang eh wala naman
yung sisihan na ikaw kasi ganyan ganyan wala. Ni minsan ba di
mo nga kami narinig na mag away niyan bihira bihira lang, di
yan siya nakiki ano katulad neto yung mainit ulo ko di ko siya
sasabayan di ka niya sasabayan kaya pag mainit ulo niya
galing sa trabaho wag mo sabayan ganun lang yun. Mga advice
sa inyo mga day wag pagsasabayan niyo init ng mga ulo ng
mga boyfriend niyo.’’ (Ms. Joy)

‘’Yung pag aanak kasi di siya yung pag gusto mo gusto mo

ngayon gagawin mo na eh.. kasi kailangan talaga planuhin lalo Plano
na sa panahon ngayon na andami daming ano tawag dito? di
handa na nag aanak kaya sana yung pag sinabi kasing anak di Responsibili-
siya dapat sinasabi na madalian lang gawin, kasi habang buhay dad
na siyang responsibilidad at di mo na kaya siyang ibalik ayun.’’
(Ms. Florentino)

‘’Uhm.. Sila ate ko, na ‘wag muna mag-anak kasi mahirap ang
buhay ngayon. Tapos katulad nito may pandemic kaya ano,
‘yun napag isipan namin na ‘wag Finances
Mahirap
munang mag anak. Wala naman (other factor), ‘yun lang Plano
talaga. Kasi kapag wala kang finances syempre kapag nandyan
na siya (child) paano yung pangangailangan na pang gatas?
Pang diaper? Ano pag ano niya, tapos kapag lumaki na siya
kung sakaling mag aaral na siya. Yung ano niya, yung mga
kailangan niya talaga. Kasi ‘di mo naman agad agad na
pagpaplanuhan agad yung pag-aanak tapos wala kang ibibigay
sa kanya. Kaya ‘yun.’’ (Ms. Christine)

‘’Napag usapan namin.. napag usapan namin na ‘wag na mag

45
anak kasi pareho na tayong matanda pareho na tayong may Matanda
edad hindi na natin kayang gampanan ng hundred percent.
Mahirap kasi i-asa yan sa iba or ‘di mo alam anong kalalabasan Responsibili-
sa atin, ng pagiging magulang natin, ‘di ba. Ganon lang ‘yon. dad
Oo kasi nung maliit pa ‘ko naranasan ko yung mag trabaho ng
wala pa sa edad, ‘di ba. Mga 11 years old, 13 years old Mahirap
ginagampanan ko na mag trabaho ng parang trabaho ng lalaki.
Yung magdadala ka ng mga.. alam mo yung sa ilog yung Pinagdaanan
maghahakot ka ng bato para lang makakain ka kasi yung
magulang mo hindi kayang gampanan kasi kulang ang pera.
Ah..ma.. na byudo kasi yung tatay ko maliit pa ako, so, after 3
months nag asawa siya, syempre dun na siya sa asawa niya
tapos kami iniwan sa isang bahay na walang ano.. walang nag
aalaga kundi kami sarili namin. So bilang.. bilang mga tao..
bilang bata kailangan mo kumain, kumayod ka para sa sarili
mo. Na experience ko yung ganon, ‘yun ang..’ yun din ang
nakapag desisyon sakin na baka.. halimbawa ako, pwedeng
may mangyari sakin pagka nagka anak ako so, maiiwan ko
yung baby ko, ‘di mo masasabi eh. Sa.. halimbawa matanda ka
na tapos pinilit mo magka anak, ‘pag pinilit mo mag anak hindi
mo alam

kung ano magiging ano outcome mo sa pagdadala mo.. sa

pagdadalang tao mo, pwede mong ikamatay, pwede mong.. ah
pwede kang ano.. magkaroon ng diperensya, ‘di ba. Ah.. ayoko
mangyari yun naranasan ko sa magiging anak ko mahirap yun.
Mahirap ‘yun. Okay lang sa ‘kin na ‘di na magka anak kasi
ayokong maranasan niya yung mga naranasan ko. Kung.. oo
na sabihin natin naging magulang ka, hindi mo ipaparanas
yung naranasan mo sa anak mo pero hindi mo masabi pag
nagka anak ka eh kasi may edad ka na.. may edad ka na,
pwedeng may mangyari sa iyo, hindi yun magagampa.. hindi
mo magagampanan bilang may edad na.. hindi mo
magagampanan hundred percent pag aalaga ng anak. So,
magiging kawawa lang ang magiging anak mo. So,
nagdesisyon kami ‘’Bat pa tayo mag aanak? masaya naman
tayo. ‘Wag na natin isipin na ah.. magkaroon pa ng ah..
makakaranas ng mga naranasan ko. ‘Di ko na ipaparanas ‘yun.
Hangga’t maiiwasan niyo, iwasan mo, ‘di ba. Kasi.. mahirap
eh.. nakakaiyak yung ganong buhay. Yung mga pinagdaanan
mo tapos.. basta.. yung pinag daanan mo na grabe. Ayaw
mong maranasan. Parang iniisip mo pa lang.. jusko.. ayokong
maranasan ng anak ko yung naranasan ko, so, bakit pa ako
mag aanak? ‘di ba. Ganon ‘yun. ‘Yun yung depinisyon ko ng
pagiging magulang mo, ‘di mo na kailangan magkaroon ng
anak, kung hindi mo lang din man hundred percent maibibigay
ang pagiging magulang mo, huwag na lang. Huwag ka nang
mag.. magdagdag ng mahihirapan. Kasi kawawa eh.. sobrang
kawawa.. ang sakit.. kung makiki- kung mararanasan ng
ibang.. halimbawa ako, masasaktan ako nyan eh, kasi anak ko
‘yan eh, ayokong maranasan niya. Hindi ko talaga ‘yan

46
ipaparanas kung ako magka anak, kaso ayoko man magka
anak.’’ (Ms. F)

‘’Ano ako madami, kasi madami ako friends na member ng

lgbt tapos mas lalo pa siyang ahh.. napanandigan nung
nagkaroon ako ng kaklase nung 3rd year college ako na sinabi
na niya ano tawag dun? ano siya eh parang di siya pab- i mean
pabor siya na sa ano sa abortion kumbaga kung magaanak siya
ayaw ng may lalaki, kung ano naman kung sakaling di siya
bigyan ng anak okay lang sa kanya na wala siya anak kasi ano
eh.. kumbaga siya iba iba kasi status niya eh may kaya talaga
sila sa pamilya niya eh. Yung sa mga friends ko naman sinabi
din naman nila na mahirap nga din yung buhay lalo na sa
Pilipinas sobrang daming ano.. demand so kawawa lang talaga
yung ano (child), isa pa ayan isa pa.. ipapasok ko rin yung lalo
na may past trauma ka, yung kunwari bata ka pa lang
sinaksaktan ka ng magulang mo, bawat maling ginagawa mo
sinasaktan ka kaagad physically, so kapag di pa yun nag he- Mahirap
heal bago ka mag anak mapapasa mo siya, yun ang best
example ko marami akong kilalang ano mga naging nanay na Trauma
napasa nila yung trauma nila sa bata. Ngayon ang nasa isip
tuloy nung bata na ay kaya ako sinasaktan ng nanay ko kasi Cryptic
mahal ako which is mali. Mapapasa niya lang din yung trauma Pregnancy
na nangyari nung sa nanay sa ibang.. sa susunod na
henerasyon kasi ang hirap din kasi magkaroon ng anak kung Childhood
sariling ahh.. sugat mo di pa nag hihilom. Marami kasi cause Experience
niyan, pwede ka magkaroon ng depression, anxiety, pinaka
malala post partum. Kasi unang kakamu- pag nanganak ka na
una kakamustahin nila yung anak mo hindi ikaw so mag s-start
na diba na ay bat yung anak ko lang kinakamusta nila bakit di
ako yan, isa rin yan kasi mas maganda mag karoon ka talaga
kung gusto mo din na magkaroon ng anak kailangan healthy
environment and health tsaka kaya din ng katawan mo tsaka
mentally. Ayun tapos ano din siguraduhin din na kaya rin
namin na buhayin yung bata.’’ (Ms. Rodelyn) ‘’Di, meron pa.’’
(Mr. Paul) ‘’Ano pa?’’ (Ms. Rodelyn) ‘’Di kasi kaya ayoko mag
ano mag anak pa, kasi ayokong maranasan niya yung
naranasan ng ate ko yung ate ko kasi meron siyang ano..’’ (Mr.
Paul) ‘’Postpartum?’’ (Ms. Rodelyn) ‘’Hindi yung sakit ng ano..’’
(Mr. Paul) ‘’Myoma? Cryptic pregnancy?’’ (Ms. Rodelyn)
‘’Cryptic yun, cryptic pregnancy. Una nag inom siya sinadya
niya parang palaglag narin, pangalawa di niya alam 7 days siya
ay 7 days..’’ (Mr. Paul) ‘’7 days?’’ (Ms. Rodelyn) ‘’3 lang yung
fingers ko.’’ (Mr. Paul) ‘’Yung totoo, ano naputol?’’ (Ms.
Rodelyn) ‘’Di, 7 days siya niregla tuloy-tuloy.’’ (Mr. Paul) ‘’Oo,
tapos nung nalaman na?’’ (Ms. Rodelyn) ‘’Oo na.’’ (Mr. Paul) ‘’
Sige na oh, sige na. Go Paul.’’ (Ms. Rodelyn) ‘’Di, 7 days siya
niregla tapos after ahh.. ano 2 weeks or 1 month yata yun nag
pa ano nag pt 3, ay 5 beses.’’ (Mr. Paul) ‘’5 ba? Kala ko 3?’’
(Ms. Rodelyn) ‘’Oo, 5.’’ (Mr. Paul) ‘’Ay, di ako na inform.’’ (Ms.

47
Rodelyn) ‘’5 kasi di gumana yung 2.’’ (Mr. Paul) ‘’Ah okay.’’
(Ms. Rodelyn) ‘’Tubig lang.. di ano.. 5 sabay ang positive suma-
ano tuwang tuwa sila 2 hours silang na tumawa pero after 2
hours din sumugod na sa ospital kasi umiiyak na sobrang sakit
na ng tyan yun pala yung baby nasa labas na. Buhay naman
pero kada.. kada kada ano daw kada galaw..’’ (Mr. Paul)
‘’Masakit.’’ (Ms. Rodelyn) ‘’Masakit kasi sa labas ng matres
umaano.’’ (Mr. Paul) ‘’Tyaka delikado rin siya kapag..’’ (Ms.
Rodelyn) ‘’Nakamamatay siya.’’ (Mr. Paul) ‘’Oo.’’ (Ms. Rodelyn)
‘’Pag pangatlong baby na niya malabo na kasi sa out ano.. sa
50/50 na yon ano lang siya 10 perce- 20 or 10? percent na
lang.’’ (Mr. Paul) ‘’10?’’ (Ms. Rodelyn) ‘’Di ko alam eh basta 20
or 10 percent nalang mabubuhay yung bata. Mabubuhay siya
pero days.. days, mamatay din wala rin, edi wag ka na mag
anak kaya ganun din ayoko sa kanya mangyari yun kasi.. kaya
ng katawan niya pero di kaya ng bata, joke lang. Di yun, yun
lang, ayoko lang.’’ (Mr. Paul) ‘’Oo meron (childhood
experience), ano tawag dito? Sobrang naka apekto siya kasi
laging sinasabi ng ano ng parent ko, pag naka anak ka gagawin
din sayo ng anak mo yan. So tumatak sa isip ko na ano, wag
nalang ako mag anak kasi gagawin din pala ng magulang- ano
gagawin din pala ng anak ko yan sakin ganon, parang..
hanggang sa natakot nako, baka mamaya tama sila, baka
mamaya gawin din, baka mas malala pa gawin ng anak ko
yung sinabi sakin ng nanay ko, kaya tumatak talaga sa isip ko
na ay di ako mag aanak ganon, di talaga. Kumbaga lagi ko ng
nireremind sa partner ko na wag, wag ayoko pa. Lalong
sobrang ano.. so- ano eh.. kumbaga sobrang trauma din yun
kahit sinasabi lang verbally, grabeng impact yun.’’ (Ms.
Rodelyn)

‘’Sa’min wala, personal choice namin siya. Kasi yun nga big
decision siya eh. Yung mag pakasal pa nga lang, malaking
desisyon na yon. Yung mag anak ka sobrang laking desisyon
yon. Siguro yung ano lang, idea nang pagkakaroon ng anak.
Siguro yung thought na yon parang nakakatakot siya sa part ko
bilang babae. Ang dami kong questions na “what if di ko
magampanan?” “Ano ang magiging result?’’. Wala naman
akong kaso don (health, religion, finances). Siguro sa
experience ng husband ko (Mr. Zian), broken family kasi siya.
So, he was raised by a single mom and hindi siya naging
madali para sa husband ko. Kasi yung husband ko, growing up,
kailangan niya gampanan ang pagiging anak at the same time
pagiging magulang niya sa magulang niya at sa mga kapatid
niya. So, parang pinapalaki siya ng magulang niya at pinapalaki
niya rin ang magulang niya. So, magulo kasi yung family niya.
Factor din yon sa’min na kailangan namin iconsider kasi hindi Personal
pwedeng maulit. Kailangan pag-aralan namin kung paano. choice
Hindi pwedeng ganito lang, gawin lang natin mag anak lang
tayo. Hindi pwede yung ganon. Kailangan planado ang mga Childhood
bagay bagay. Hindi pwedeng tsaka mo lang gagawin pag Experience

48
nandiyan na. Mahirap kasi yung ganon. Kaya hanggang maaari
iniiwasan namin yung naging experience nila magkakapatid. Responsibility
Kasi mahirap, kahit siya aaminin niya mahirap. Kaya ako
naiintindihan ko kasi alam ko yung feeling na wala kang ama.
Mahirap yung part na yon. Kaya sa’min ngayon, okay kami na
kami lang muna. Walang problema sa religion. Yun lang talaga
ang desisyon namin. Wala naman akong childhood experience.
Choice ko lang talagang di magkaanak. Kasi di ko nakikita yung
need na magka anak. Wala akong problema sa ibang aspect.
Ang pag aanak kasi talaga malaking responsibility siya.
Kumbaga kung kailangan mo maging hands on para alagaan
yung bata, gagawin mo.’’ (Ms. Geng)

‘’Wala namang tao ang nakaimpluwensiya. ‘Yon talaga ang

ginusto namin. Kasi ‘pag pinilit namin ang gusto namin
magiging kawawa ang bata. At the same time, kawawa rin
magiging buhay namin. Kasi di na nga sapat yung kinikita
tapos may dadagdag pa. Parang maghihirap lang yung bata.
‘Yong bahay namin ngayon kasi nakatira lang kami sa squatters
area. Para sa’kin di ko siya priority kasi ayokong lumaki siya
(child) sa gano’n environment. Gusto ko ‘pag stable na kaming
mag-asawa, gusto ko lilipat kami sa environment na
kalalakihan na maganda. Hindi naman sa pangit yung place
namin hindi ko lang siya gusto as a mom na doon siya lalaki.
Sa’kin, is yung lack of emotional support. Lumaki

kasi ako sa pamilyang hindi gano’n ka expressive na sasabihan

ka ng “proud ako sayo”, “mahal kita”, thank you”. Kaya parang Di sapat ang
baka mapasa ko sa magiging anak ko unconsciously. Gusto ko kinikita
muna ayusin yung sarili ko. Sa partner ko naman, binugbog
kasi siya ng father niya noong bata pa. Hindi ko naman Squatters
sinasabing baka gawin niya yon sa anak namin. Syempre gusto area
muna naming ma-heal ang mga issues namin. Gusto ko muna
na magtagal kami.’’ (Ms. Ly) Kawawa

‘’Ahh ayon.. Ang naka impluwensya sa amin yung kamag-anak Personal

namin, kamag-anak ko.. Mother's side, tita ko, na walang issues
asawa, ay may asawa, walang anak kasi dahil sa baog. Nakita
ko sa kanila naging masaya sila sa relasyon nila na kahit Trauma
walang anak ay hindi sila nawawalan ng pag-asa na maging
pamilya at bukod dun nagagawa nila mga gusto nila bilang Lack of
couple, bilang mag-asawa mga nagagawa ng mga malalayang emotional
pamilya. Ahhm… ayun nga yung naranasan ng misis ko nung support
bata pa sya ayaw niya na niyang maulit yun pero sa nakikita ko
naman sa kanya sa isang responsable baka mabago at bata pa Binubugbog
naman kami, baka magbago ang kanyang desisyon.’’ (Mr.
Garang)

‘’Siguro kaming ano isat isa.. syempre ano eh.. Hindi naman
yan namin kukunin yung influence sa ibang tao kailangan nyan
ano eh.. na kami mismo ang mag dedecide kung mag aanak

49
kami or hindi pero since mutual naman and wala naman naging
hadlang doon sa gusto naming mangyari, yun na yung nakapag
desisyon namin na wag na wag kang mag anak.’’ (Ms. Kaye)
‘’Wala namang influence siguro siguro siguro one influence is
how the country or world going right now, ano na lang yun na Baog
lang yung influence namin na we don’t want to raise a child or
children sa ganitong sitwasyon.’’ (Mr. Joe) ‘’Government and Kamag-anak
yung country, yung estado ng pamumuhay natin ngayon kasi di Childhood
hindi naman ganun kadali.. hindi naman ganun kadali na mag.. Experiences
madali kasi mag anak, ang hindi madali yung mag ra-raise ka
ng bata sa ganitong estado ng buhay na sobrang hirap, andito
na nararanasan natin inflation ngayon diba.’’ (Ms. Kaye) ‘’I
think uhmm.. of course meron syempre (childhood experience),
we.. ako personally i didn't came from a well off family
syempre diba i experience yung ahh.. hirap and of course yung
hirap din ng parents ko in raising children, kaming Personal
magkakapatid, and ahh.. i didn’t want if ever I’m going to have choice
a children, i didn’t want my children or child to experience that
kaya ayaw ko.’’ (Mr. Joe) ‘’Same lang naman kami ng sagot, Hirap
since ahh.. yung hirap ng pagpapalaki sa amin ng mga
magulang ko, ayoko din namang maranasan.. i mean ayokong Government
maranasan ng bata na, bata pa lang siya dala-dala nya na yung
hirap.’’ (Ms. Kaye) Oo meron
(childhood
experience)

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B. Photo Documentation

51
C. Map of Research Locale

Tandang Sora Avenue, Quezon City (photo from Google Map)

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D. Biographical Statement

53