Patricia Morales Rojas

Dr. Warwick

Writing 1

November 22, 2023

The Journey of a Mexican-American First-Generation Individual

What is your parents occupation? What is the highest education level that your parents

reached? My peers would answer these questions with no hesitation and with such pride as their

parents had professional jobs according to society. As a Mexican-American first-generation

student these questions intimidated and haunted me since one, I grew up with a single mother

and two, she did not have a professional job according to society. It didn’t help that in my area

where I lived, my community was scattered and looked down on. Being the daughter of

immigrants I was fortunate enough to be taught both Spanish and English during elementary

school through FLAG, a dual immersion program. I didn’t feel alone as I found myself and other

classmates who understood the Latinx and first-generation experience with our parents working

the same or similar occupation. It was usually our moms working in housekeeping and our dads

working in the kitchen, within the city or outside the city with unspeakable working hours. We

had created a sense of comfort and community, even those kids who were not first-generation or

Latinx formed part of this family with teachers who were also first-generation and Latinx.

Everything school related was immersed with lots of books from our culture, our experiences,

foods we make at home, overall submerged with our lives. It was here, where I was interested in

reading a ton of books in both English and Spanish, which many cannot say. It helped that I

didn’t have the latest technology like other children in that time, and that my mom also

encouraged me by buying me more books.

 It was soon time for us to leave the safe walls of our elementary school classroom and

move forward to middle school where our school family split up. Entering this weird state of

teen years, I and many other of my friends who I grew up with noticed that we never got to see

ourselves in the media. In popular TV shows, movies, and books there wasn’t anyone who

looked like me or experienced the same things as I did unless it was a funny side character or

stereotypical Latinx persona. The only time I felt somewhat acknowledged was during Hispanic

Heritage Month and we touched on the basics like Cesar Chavez, Dolores Huerta, Frida Kahlo,

and called it a day. During middle school, I would look at my peers and see Anglo-European

features with a few sprinkled POCs here and there. My love and curiosity for reading and writing

soon turned into gut-wrenching anxiety and fear now that we were focused on a stale reading

curriculum and had to write in specific English writing expectations. Although I felt these insane

expectations from me I can say that I wasn’t alone as my old classmates also expressed the same

feelings in their new schools. We were no longer in our elementary classroom enriched with

culture. In the reading, “Workin’ Languages: Who We Are Matters in Our Writing” observes

how “...standard written English…is an ideal that centers a “norm” often conceived as white,

upper-middle class, “accentless,” and male, built from a myth that our society needs only one

language for unity.” As a university student reading this I realized that all those past readings I

did during middle school and highschool limited me as a student and in my personal identity. For

a long time I felt lost when having to write an essay or assignment since this specific form of

writing was never introduced to me. Going into highschool many of my English teachers would

tell me “why aren’t you in Honors or AP English? I can write you a recommendation letter if you

want.” I always denied their offer as I was not confident enough to go into these intimidating

level classes where I wouldn’t be able to understand the reading list and write a well thought out
essay in the span of like 30-40 minutes. Instead I took other AP and Honors classes where I

knew I could do well but I found myself being the only one being Latinx and first-generation

while the rest were of Anglo-European descent. As club president of the Spanish Club in my

highschool, when the rest of the club presidents and I had to meet up with ASB, again I found

little to none of POC’s and less of first-generation students representing the numerous clubs at

our school. I was that representation for others which I took pride in but to be honest it was

harder to fight for my events with the administrations who were white males. Fundraisers I

wanted to host for my club were denied as it went against the food restrictions that were

implemented for the students' safety. Which in hindsight is totally valid but why were other clubs

who were ran by Anglo-Europeans holding club fundraisers that went against this protocol? My

cabinet and I were persistent with our fundraiser requests and got some down before we were off

to college. In fact, the fundraisers we hosted had such a great turn out that we had to extend

whatever we were selling for the next day and have less than 24 hours to prepare for it. The

adrenaline rush was awesome but knowing that it meant being represented in a place where our

scarce community was looked down on, was the biggest gift we could’ve received.

My school demographics didn’t weigh me down as the media was slowly highlighting

more and more creators who were also first-generation kids and Latinx expressing what it felt

like to be part of this community. We get to see more first-generation and Latinx actors in major

movies like actress Xotchitl Gómez in a Marvel movie and actor Xolo Maridueña in the new

“Blue Beetle” DC movie. It’s in this movie where we get to hear songs that I’ve heard growing

up when my mom is deep cleaning the house on a Sunday morning. We also see the hardships of

a Mexican-American first-generation individual when faced with the lack of citizenship from

their hard-working parents. It’s a difficult place to be in when the entire country hates and judges
them for that. Something like this, that still scares me today, being shown in theaters across the

nations is something that my little girl self wouldn’t have believed. In promos and interviews

these actors talk about these important aspects and experiences as well and how it shapes one's

identity as well creating that feeling of being seen as a minority group. In addition to actors being

given the opportunity to star in the big screen, movies based on Mexican-American

first-generation individuals are also rising. The movie “A Million Miles Away” highlights the

life of astronaut, Dr. José Hernández, UCSB alumni, and most importantly part of the

Mexican-American first-generation community. This movie captures everything from the

atmosphere we live in. In the movie, everyone tells him to settle for being an engineer because

that was more than enough to keep him financially stable and more than what his farmworker

parents could ever do. However, Dr. José Hernández did not settle for anything and went on to

achieve his dream of becoming an astronaut and fulfilling his little boy dreams, which to say the

least was not easy. This circumstance reminded me of when I started getting my acceptances for

colleges and my parents told me that I should just go to the community college to be close to

home. Their words lingered in my mind but I knew how much I worked throughout my

educational career plus I was not going to settle for anything and now I’m here at UCSB, a top

public university in the nation. Exposure to these experiences in our community is so important

for our youth and I’m happy that it’s being brought into the light more and more everyday.

Social media has also become such a powerful tool for many influencers to reach out to

new audiences not just with stereotypical skits but with many different forms of self expression.

Some go towards the artistic route by promoting new music that expresses the feelings we have

to keep locked up being part of this community or physical art that they have composed with

various forms of medium to show the different aspects of this community as well. There are
others who express their love of dance like folklorico, a traditional Mexican dance, or show

tutorials of the different types of dances that the Latinx community has to offer for those who

don’t know it and want to learn. There are podcasts where they talk about serious issues that

have created a certain mindset in our community and how it takes a toll on us. There are even

forms of literature turned into videos in order for exposure to a bigger audience. There is one

author, Vianney Harelly, who has captured my attention as they use their platform to talk about

generational trauma and how to reclaim ourselves through our rich culture. In the same reading

mentioned, they point out that “writing for our communities can also come down to how we do

language in our writing to better reach our communities” (Alvarez, Wan, Lee, page 11). It was

through the poems of Vianney Harelly that I got to process my experiences as a first-generation

and Latinx individual as well for others like me. She goes around cities as a public speaker,

hosting workshops and events for anyone to join and talk about their experiences that aren’t

supposed to be spoken about in our community. Making this discovery as a late teen or young

adult, I reclicked with my little girl self who loved to read and started to read again for myself.

Instead of being told by mom to stop being on my phone she now tells me to stop reading which

takes me back again to my younger years. It also helped that my AP Spanish Language and

Literature courses in high school, and Spanish courses here at UCSB, exposed me to more

Spanish literature that was not boring or constricted like the ones in my English classes. Today,

although I don’t see many Latinx faces on campus, I’m comfortable knowing we have an array

of clubs, opportunities, and school resources waiting for us. It was here at UCSB where I felt like

I was in my safe elementary school classroom when my classmates (well friends now) and I had

to work on our -ism for our final project for our Spanish 30 Literature course. Our -ism was

centered on family expectations and since we had to incorporate outside media, I suggested we
add a poem written by Vianney Varelly and an analysis on the movie “Encanto.” My groupmates'

eyes lit up when I mentioned Vianney Harelly as they also see their content on social media. We

discussed how much we love that her poems are sometimes written in Spanglish because usually

that’s how our community speaks and thinks, since we are bilingual. It’s those little things that

bring so much representation to our community that make us feel seen. Again, in the same article

it mentions how our intended audience can be “...a way to show that our families, friends, and

people in our communities and their lives–their language and cultural practices, histories, and

ways of living–-and the knowledge from their lived experiences matter” (Alvarez, Lee, Wan,

page 11). Through Harelly’s published books, filled with poems about our experiences, not just

myself but others feel valued. That night that we constructed our project in the library, we talked

for hours about which poem would be the best to use since all of them were so captivating for

our theme. We got an A in that final project with our professor who was also first-generation and

Latinx telling us how much she enjoyed reading our project and the form of media we

incorporated in it. I even found my mom sending me her poems about healing through TikTok

and telling me how much she wants to purchase her book. Many of us deserve to be

acknowledged for our experiences and feelings, and through the many forms of self-expression

allow us to feel validated.

Today, I am not hesitant to answer the questions: what is my parents occupation? or what

is my parents highest level of education? Now I take pride in how their occupation has not

changed since I was little but am still at the same level as my peers whose parents have

professional jobs. It has given me and other individuals the strength and motivation to keep

pushing forward and start a legacy where we are today. Communication is a powerful tool in any

situation and through many generations of societal expectations, those of us who form part of the
first-generation and Latinx community find it difficult to communicate with others whether it be

our parents, our peers, or even ourselves. Today, I no longer feel like I can only speak about

these experiences in my Spanish courses but I can also look through many forms of self

expression and forms of media for people who are just like me and feel the same emotions as I

do. I can confidently tell myself that que no estoy solita (I’m not alone) and that que si se puede

también (I can do it too).

Work Cited

P. Alvarez, Sarah et al. Workin’ Languages: Who We Are Matters In Our Writing. Working

Spaces, Volume 4.