This member-only story is on us.

Upgrade to
access all of Medium.

Member-only story

Logic vs. Heart: How

Should You Make Big
Decisions?
Wendy Miller · Follow
4 min read · Mar 6, 2019

Listen Share More

People will tell you that you should

always make logical decisions. All
decisions should be based on fact, on
reason, on thinking, but not on emotion,
they argue. I don’t completely disagree.
There are a lot of decisions that should
be based on fact. If you can get cell
phone service that’s just as good but
cheaper, that’s a logical decision with no
emotion required. If your car needs to be
repaired, of course you should make a
logical decision about which mechanic
to hire to fix it. But emotional decisions
have their place, too.

If you find that a logical decision is

eluding you, it might be because you
need to use your heart instead.

Photo Credit: Dana Tentis on Pixabay

Logic doesn’t always apply

There are millions of decision that
require logic and thinking. Those same
decisions are also very often easy.
There’s a list of facts, an easy pro and
con list, or something else that makes
the choice clear. Even if the choice later
turns out to be wrong, there’s still
something you can point to that explains
why you made that choice.

But sometimes logic is only part of the

equation. Other times, logic doesn’t
apply at all.

Take having a baby, for example. There’s

logic involved in determining whether
you have the finances to support a baby,
if your home is large enough, and if your
health is good enough. But there’s much
more to the decision than that. What
about desire: do you want to have a
baby? Do you feel ready to have a baby?
Would you rather have a puppy instead?

What about starting a relationship?

Logic tends to be out of place in those
kinds of decisions. They’re made based
on questions like do I like this person,
what do we have in common, and do I
want to spend that much time with
them? Logic rarely comes into play in
these decisions, though it’s not entirely
out of the question.

Ignore logic if you’re struggling

If you’ve been struggling with a decision
for a while, try ignoring logic. Ignore the
people who tell you to think it over and
make a reasonable decision.

Instead, close your eyes and take a deep

breath. Take several deep breaths, if you
need to, until you feel relaxed. Then ask
yourself questions like the following:

What do I want to do?

If there were no negative

consequences for my decision, what
would I choose?

Gun to my head, I have to choose

right now, what do I choose?

If the choices are limited, you can also

try imagining yourself after making each
decision. What happens to you? Are you
happy? What about the people around
you, how are they affected? Sometimes,
when you imagine yourself in each
potential outcome, you realize which
one you really want.

Another thing you can try, still sitting

with your eyes closed and relaxed, is
simply waiting for something to bubble
up. Don’t ask specific questions, don’t try
to imagine yourself in scenarios. Just sit
there and wait. Your heart, or your
intuition, will eventually come forward
with an answer. It will whisper to you
what you really want to do. It knows,
even when logic doesn’t.

Photo Credit: one_life on Pixabay

The hardest decisions are often

emotional
The thing about logical decisions is that
they usually lock us into the decision
with the lowest amount of risk, not the
one that will make us the happiest.

Using logic to decide whether to stay or

leave an unhappy relationship, for
example, is likely to lead to you staying,
because you rely on their income to
survive financially or you’re scared to try
to date again. But using your heart might
lead to you leaving because you know
you’ll be happier if you free yourself to
find the right person for you.

A logical decision about quitting your job

will lead to you staying because you can
count on the income, while the heart
will tell you to quit and start that
passion-based business you’ve always
dreamed of.

If decreasing risk is what matters to you,

then logic wins. But if you’ve been
struggling for a long time with a
decision, or if what you’re really
searching for is happiness, give your
heart a chance to have its say.

Give it a try. See what happens. You

might find that many of the decisions
you’ve been struggling with are resolved
almost instantly just by changing which
organ you use to make the decision.

18
Entrepreneurship Life Lessons

Life Heart Relationships

18

Follow

Written by Wendy Miller

2.1K Followers

Writer | Meditation Teacher | Self-Care Expert |

www.writewithwendy.com |
www.mindfulsinglemom.com

More from Wendy Miller

Wendy Miller

Who Comes First: Significant Other

or Grown Children?
Things can get a little murky when you’re
dating and have adult children

· 7 min read · Aug 10, 2020

13 5

Wendy Miller

Breaking the Triangle: Should You

Tell a Cheater’s Spouse?
When you find out the person you’ve been
seeing is married, should you tell their…
spouse?
· 7 min read · Nov 16, 2019

64 2

Wendy Miller in Love & the Single Parent

Yes, You Do Need to Teach Your

Partner How to Love You
The memes are wrong. You do need to teach
your partner how to love you. And they need…
to do the same.
· 7 min read · Jan 6, 2020

1.92K 5

What to Do When Your Ex Bails on the Kids

Wendy Miller in Love & the Single Parent

What to Do When Your Ex Bails on

the Kids
What do you do when your ex walks away
without a backward glance?

· 9 min read · Aug 24, 2020

See all from Wendy Miller

Recommended from Medium

Alexandru Lazar in ILLUMINATION

Ten Habits that will get you ahead

of 99% of People
Improve your life and get ahead of your peers
in 10 simple steps

9 min read · Nov 18

9K 161

Anthony J. Yeung in Mind Cafe

10 Incredibly Valuable Dating

Lessons I Wish I Knew 10 Years Ago
I don’t have regrets, but these would’ve
helped a lot.

· 8 min read · 5 days ago

1.5K 27

Lists

Stories to Help You Live Better

19 stories · 880 saves

Some of My Favorite Personal

Essays
18 stories · 522 saves

How to Give Difficult

Feedback
7 stories · 346 saves

A Guide to Choosing,
Planning, and Achieving…
Personal
13 stories · Goals
713 saves

Nick Wignall

7 Psychological Habits of Highly

Successful People
#2: Metacognition

· 6 min read · 5 days ago

2K 44

Stop Telling People Everything

Oyinade

Stop Telling People Everything

My experience

3 min read · Oct 9

19.4K 624

How to *really* know you’re in love

Kris Gage

How to *really* know you’re in love

Because most of “the signs” they tell you are
garbage

· 4 min read · Aug 3, 2017

107K 620

Matthew Coast

When A Man Is USING A Woman,

He’ll Do THESE 5 Things…
Recognize and protect yourselves.

6 min read · Oct 5

1.3K 22

See more recommendations