Torture At It’s Finest

Posted originally on the Archive of Our Own at http://archiveofourown.org/works/33395857.

Rating: Mature
Archive Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Category: F/M
Fandom: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Relationships: Hermione Granger/Draco Malfoy, Hermione Granger & Draco Malfoy,
Theodore Nott/Pansy Parkinson
Characters: Hermione Granger, Draco Malfoy, Ron Weasley, Ginny Weasley, Tom
Riddle | Voldemort, Voldemort (Harry Potter), Pansy Parkinson,
Theodore Nott, Blaise Zabini, Adrian Pucey, Bellatrix Black Lestrange,
Daphne Greengrass, Molly Weasley, Seamus Finnigan, George Weasley,
Padma Patil, Parvati Patil, Luna Lovegood, Alastor "Mad-Eye" Moody,
Kingsley Shacklebolt, Harry Potter, Hannah Abbott, Neville Longbottom
Additional Tags: Torture, Blood and Torture, Dark Hermione Granger, Dark Hermione
Granger/Draco Malfoy, Dark, Blood Kink, Blood and Violence,
Possessive Draco Malfoy, Sexual Content, Praise Kink, Death Eater
Hermione Granger, Death Eater Draco Malfoy, Light Knifeplay, Vaginal
Fingering, My First Smut, Smut, Masochism, Ron Weasley Bashing,
Degrading kink, Rough Oral Sex, A lot of murder, Emotional Hurt,
Character Death, Flashbacks, Death Eater Luna Lovegood, Suicidal
Thoughts, Alternate Universe - Voldemort Wins, BAMF Hermione
Granger, Hermione Granger & Theodore Nott Friendship, Hermione
Granger & Pansy Parkinson Friendship, Mentor Voldemort (Harry
Potter), voldemort is like a dad to hermione
Language: English
Collections: Dramioneotp
Stats: Published: 2021-08-21 Updated: 2024-02-12 Words: 40,475 Chapters:
12/20
 Torture At It’s Finest
by Lylawrigh

Summary

Hermione Granger, loyal Death eater, Voldemort’s favourite. But what drove her to the dark
side?

Notes

This is a dark-ish one shot, if you don’t like torture or blood or masochism then I would not
recommend reading this.

Also this is my first time attempting smut, sorry if it disappoints. It’s also my first dark one
shot.

oneshot turned multi-chapter fic!!!

Updates every sunday :)

See the end of the work for more notes

 Chapter 1

She plunged the dagger deeply into his chest, a smile tugging at her lips. She twisted it,
hearing his screams and cries ricochet off the four walls. Removing the dagger from is body
she ran her middle finger down the sharp edge, gathering the blood that was dripping down,
pricking her finger. She liked the pain.

She lifted her finger to her lips and sucked on it. “Hmm.” She hummed around her finger,
slowly pulling it out of her mouth to savour the taste. “It tastes so good, mudblood and blood
traitor mixed together.”

“Mione p-please stop, please.” Ron stuttered. She laughed. Smiling maliciously. She loved it
when they begged.

Tears, blood and snot dripping from his nose, he was breathing raggedly. She just stared at
him smiling, she licked the rest of the dagger clean, slicing her tongue a little. “Poor little
Ronald begging for the mudblood to show him mercy. This is who I am, who I’ve always
been.”

“No, no, you’re good, your Hermione Granger. The face of the Order. You were the light in
the darkness. Hermione, you loved me once, please remember.” Ron’s skin was turning a
shade of white that could only be seen on paper.

“That’s where you’re wrong, I’ve been told before as you know, that I’ve always had a
darkness inside of me, I just kept it hidden. I was always on the wrong side, babying you and
Harry, I wasn’t your mothers.” She started chuckling. “Well definitely not Harry’s, my lord
saw to that when he killed her in her own home.”

Ron began speaking but was cut off by Hermione’s dagger cutting his shirt and forcefully
driving it between his ribs. He tried to grab the wound but couldn’t as his hands and feet were
tied to the floor and ceiling.

She slashed his biceps, his thighs, his forearms and any place she saw fit to repeatedly slice
for her own satisfaction.

She smiled sweetly at him as she bought the dagger to his cheek. “Now Ron, where’s that
charming smile of yours?” She questioned. Her voice sounded sadistic even to her own ears
but she revelled in his pain and wide eyed expression.

As quick as lightning she slashed from the corner of Ron’s lips to his ear. “There we are, I do
adore that smile you wear so often.”

Ron’s breathing was shaky at best, as if his ribs were playing music under his skin and
muscles. A door opened to her right and she slowly turned around.

“My lord.” She bowed her head as Voldemort entered with two others.
“How is my favourite death eater this evening?” His snake like eyes took in the pathetic boy
strung up in the middle of the room. “I see you’ve had a little play with the boy. I always
admire your art Miss Granger.” Her chest swelled with pride.

“Yes my lord, he’ll be dead in roughly five minutes.” She lifted her head and smiled at him.
His face broke out into a grin, his tongue snaked out to lick Ron’s cheek.

He turned his head to the two other death eaters in the room. “Draco, you will help her
discard the body once she’s through with him.” Draco nodded his head, she couldn’t see his
face through his mask, only his bright grey eyes as they took in Ron’s disheveled state.

“Well I’ll be off, I have others to see, you’re doing so well miss Granger, keep it up.”
Voldemort made to leave the room when Ron spoke up.

“You monster, you ruined her!” He tried to shout but it sounded more like a high pitched
squeak.

“That is where you are wrong young traitor, I did not ruin her, I made her who she is, I
showed her what her true potential was and she just blossomed under my care.”

“You ruined her you filthy monste-“ Ron never got to finish his sentence as Hermione spun
around hitting him with a Crucio.

“You dare speak to my lord in such a manner!” Hermione was furious, so furious she nearly
killed Ron right there. But she wasn’t finished playing.

Voldemort came up beside her, grabbing her wrist and lowering her wand. “You’re so loyal to
me miss Granger, after you’ve finished with the boy, I have the boys sister in the other room,
I was going to give her to Greyback but she’s all yours.” Someone made a grunt of
disappointment and Hermione assumed the second death eater was Greyback himself.

“Thank you my lord, I’ll make her pay.” Voldemort bent his head low and kissed her cheek.
“Very well, I’ll admire your work on the Weasley girl later.” He swiftly left the room leaving
only Hermione, Draco and a dying Ron in the room.

She circled Ron. Standing behind him. Draco cleared his throat. She looked up at him as he
magically took off his mask. “How much longer are you going to be with the weasel, love?”
He asked.

“Not much longer, I want to rip his spine out and then I’ll be finished.” Ron tried again to
break free of his restraints but Hermione’s spell to keep them in place was too strong.

Draco conjured a chair and placed it right in front of Ron. He patted his lap. “Before he dies,
let’s give him a show.” Hermione and Draco both grinned at each other. She made her way to
Draco, straddling his lap. Once she was seated Draco waved his hand in the air and the chair
spun so Ron had a side view of them.

Draco ran his hands all over her body, gripping her arse and Hermione moaned at the
sensation, she ground her hips into his, releasing soft sighs from her parted lips.
Ron closed his eyes, not wanting to see the girl he once knew with his enemy. Hermione
tutted. “Now that won’t do, eyes open Ronald, it’s a free show after all, charity cases like you
live for free things.” When Ron didn’t open his eyes Hermione grew frustrated.

Swiftly removing herself from Draco, she stalked toward Ron, dagger in hand. “Open your
eyes.” She demanded. He refused, shaking his head side to side.

Her frustration was growing, she passed the dagger from hand to hand. “One last chance,
open your eyes.” He still refused. She took the dagger in one hand and his chin in the other.
She put the dagger to his closed eyelid and with one precise flick of her wrist his eyelid fell
to the floor.

Ron screamed and writhed in his restraints. And Hermione made quick work of slicing the
other eyelid off. She cast a Scourgify so the blood didn’t conceal his vision and a silencing
charm.

She made her way back to Draco’s waiting lap, his eyes full of admiration, lust and want. As
she settled she felt his hardness through his trousers. She looked over at Ron as she ground
her centre against him.

His head was lolled to one side so she cast a spell that made a chain wrap around his throat
and connect to the ceiling. Now he couldn’t look away.

Draco grabbed a fistful of her hair from the base of her neck and crushed their lips together. It
was a hard and needy kiss. Tongues battling against each other. Teeth digging into lips, hard
enough that they were drawing blood. Neither cared, the pain turned them on all the more.

Draco started removing Hermione’s robes and shirt. Once her chest was clad in her bra he
took the dagger from her holster and cut the straps. Moving the dagger between her breasts
and cutting the middle. Her bra fell into his lap and he threw it towards Ron’s direction.

The way he kissed down her neck and between her breasts, capturing a nipple between his
teeth before lightly flicking his tongue against it, caused so many sensations in her body to
ignite. It made her feel euphoric.

He turned his attentions to the other nipple, biting down hard. Laying his tongue flat over her
abused bud, soothing the pain she greedily accepted. Her back arched, pushing her breast
closer to his tongue.

Hermione took off his robes and then his shirt and threw it behind her. Leaning down to
assault his neck. She bit and nipped at the base of his throat, sucking and licking to sooth the
darkening spots forming. She licked his pulse point and he bucked his hips. She bit down.
Pulling back and looking into his eyes, she smiled devilishly.

“The dagger Draco, I want it.” He handed her the dagger and cut a small incision on his neck,
watching the blood trickle down. She flattened her tongue and licked a long strip from his
collarbone to the wound. Her cunt spasmed around nothing. The taste of blood making her
stomach coil.
She kissed him again, soft and sweet.

He could taste his own blood, but he wanted to taste hers. He took the dagger from her hand
and cut the top of her breast. Hermione moaned at the feel of it, grinding harder against him.

“You love that don’t you my good girl?” He cooed in her ear. Caressing her cut breast with
his tongue. “You love that I’m swallowing your blood, it makes you feel powerful doesn’t
it?” She moaned in response.

He gripped her jaw roughly, she looked at him, his pupils blown wide. “Answer me when I’m
speaking to you.” He demanded.

“Yes, fuck yes, I need more Draco, I need your cock.” She begged him. Rocking her hips
back and forth over his covered length.

“All in good time my little mudblood. Remove your trousers.” She took herself off of his lap
and removed her trousers. “Now your underwear.” She readily complied. Draco stood and
took off both his trousers and boxers. His cock standing to attention. Sitting back down into
the chair, Hermione climbed into his lap once more.

Once she was settled Draco grabbed her throat, his large hands gripping her firmly. “Touch
yourself.” He told her. She slipped her hand down her soft stomach, once she reached her
mound, she dragged her middle and ring finger down her slit to her opening. She gathered her
juices and circled her clit, once, twice, three times. She was about to enter herself but before
she could his hand caught her wrist. He bought her fingers to his mouth taking a deep inhale.

“You smell so sweet, you’re such a good girl for me Hermione.” He sucked her ring finger
into his mouth, lapping at the digit. Removing her finger, he put her middle finger to her lips.
“You taste sweet too. Here have a taste.” He suggested. “Suck.” He said in that commanding
tone she loved so much. She sucked on her finger, she did taste sweet.

Draco’s hand made it’s way to her cunt, starting at her opening, collecting her juices. He
flicked her clit then entered two fingers into her. He started pumping his digits in and out of
her at a slow, languid pace. Hermione rocked her hips into his hand causing his palm to hit
her clit just right.

“Gods you’re tight, do you like fucking my hand, Hmm? Do you enjoy riding my fingers?”
He quickened his pace slamming his fingers deep inside her.

“I prefer your cock, the way it stretches me, it feels so good.” Draco removed his hand and
Hermione whined and pouted at the loss. Before she could protest he sank three fingers into
her waiting cunt. This new stretch made her clench around his fingers. She ground harder
against his hand, he let her, he loved when she used him for her own pleasure.

He flicked his thumb against her clit hard and she clenched her cunt around his fingers again
and again. Pumping his fingers aggressively into her a few more times before he pulled them
out.
His fingers left her and he shoved them into her mouth and down her throat. She sucked on
them, her hips moving over nothing, her moans vibrating around his fingers. He pulled them
out of her mouth and smashed their lips together once more.

He could taste her on her tongue and it made his cock twitch. They pulled apart and
Hermione looked down seeing the pre cum gathered on his tip. She swiped her thumb across
it and her tongue slithered out to taste.

“Fuck, I need to be inside you.” Draco moaned.

“Please, fuck me Draco, use my cunt, I’m yours.” That sounded like heaven to Draco and his
cock started to throb.

Hermione grabbed his cock and placed it at her entrance. Sliding down slowly until he was
completely sheathed inside of her. They both sat there not moving, just waiting as she grew
accustomed to his size.

She moaned as he lifted his hips, he grabbed her waist with both hands in a hold that was vice
like. “Can you be a good girl and stay still for me?” He said. Flexing his hands on her waist.

“Yes, I’ll be good, I’ll be so good, just for you.” She keened.

“That’s my good little mudblood.” He lifted her up so that it was only the head of him in her
and then slammed her down. Her back arched and she gripped his shoulders. A silent scream
on her lips. Her nails making little half crescents into the skin of his shoulders and back.

“I said” Thrust. “Stay” Thrust. “Still.”

Another hard thrust and her walls gripped him. Her loud moans filling the room. He knew
she was close but he wasn’t finished with her yet.

He pulled out of her and stood her up on her feet, he turned her around, repositioning them so
they both were standing, him behind her.

Right in front of Ron.

If he had eyelids she’s sure they would have raised with his eyebrows.

She gripped Ron’s shoulders as draco drove into her from behind, thrusting into her
forcefully. He grabbed her throat, pulling out just to the tip before plunging into her
repeatedly. Hard.

“You wish it was you don’t you Weasley? Fucking her like this, like the little mudblood she
is, you wish it was your cock she was squeezing as you bought her to her peak.” Ron had
tears falling down his cheeks, he looked like he was trying to blink them away.

“She’s mine Weasley, mine.” He removed his hand from her throat and twisted her locks
between his fingers, roughly pulling her head up so she was eye level with Ron. She smirked
at him.
“Watch her face as I make her cum, watch as her features contort with pleasure, pleasure that
I, Draco Malfoy, am giving her, you’d never be able to make her orgasm. Not like I can.” His
hand slithered around her stomach and he fingered her clit. Hermione howled loudly as Draco
set his punishing pace, both with his cock and fingers.

“Oh Ronald, don’t cry.” Hermione cooed even though it came out a little strangled. “You
were never the one for me, you’re nothing compared to Draco.”

“That’s it, tell him how worthless he is.” Draco goaded her.

“You’re worthless Ron, no woman in their right mind would ever willingly sleep with you,
let alone fall in love with you.” Her words were breathy as she moaned from the feel of
Draco roughly slamming into her.

“Tell him who’s going to make you cum, tell him who’s fucking you raw.”

“Draco.” She wailed. “Draco’s fucking me, he’s going to make me cum, just like countless
times before. I’m his, I was never yours Ron, I belong to Draco.”

Draco made an approving sound at the back of his throat and sped up his ministrations on her
clit, her cunt clenched around him and a few more flicks to her clit and she shattered around
him. Her walls fluttered and her legs shook. White spots formed in her vision. Draco
continued to thrust into her, hard and fast until he reached his own release.

He slumped against her back, both catching the breath. Hermione’s walls still softly
squeezing him and his release pumping into her. He pulled out of her, watching as both of
them slipped down her thighs. Hermione wiped her thigh with her fingers and licked it off.
“We taste so good together.” She hummed. Draco took his own fingers and slid them through
their combined juices. Bringing them back to her opening and pushing them into her.

“My cum belongs inside you.” He removed his fingers and licked them clean. “You’re right,
we do taste good.”

When she turned around, Draco’s cheeks and chest were flushed pink, it probably matched
her own. She kissed him softly, running her hands through his now sweat soaked hair.

He pulled away first. “Get dressed, we have another Weasley to torture.” When they were
both dressed Hermione removed the silencing charm from Ron.

“Any last words before you die?” She asked him in a sickly sweet voice.

“You’re a whore, a filthy dirty whore.” He wheezed.

She tapped his split cheek and he flinched. “Oh Ronald dear, I’ve been called much worse.”
She vanished the chains around him and he fell into a heap on the floor.

“Ready love?” Draco asked, his hand outstretched ready for her to take. “Just one second.”
She climbed and sat on Ron’s waist. Using a slicing charm she severed his head from his
body and picked it up by his hair. Turning to show Draco. He grinned at her. “It’s not his
spine.” He said sarcastically. “But I guess it’ll do.”
“Now I’m ready. Let’s show the she-Weasley what’s left of her brother.” She beamed.

She took his his hand in her unoccupied one and they walked towards the door. Ron’s head
swinging back and forth. “Aren’t you supposed to get rid of his body?” She asked.

“I’ll do it later.” He replied.

They left the room hand in hand walking down the corridor towards Ginny’s holding cell.
When they entered Hermione hid Ron’s head behind her back.

“Evening weaslette, we’ve come to show you something.” Draco said in a charming voice.
Hermione let go of his hand and walked towards where Ginny was strung up into the air.

“Hello Gin, how are you?” Ginny ignore her. So Hermione took a step towards her. “Look!”
Hermione thrusted Ron’s head into Ginny’s eye line. Her blue eyes went wide.

Ginny’s screams were drowned out by Draco and Hermione’s maniacal laughter.
 Chapter 2
Chapter Notes

I’ve decided to make this a multi chapter fic, I’m not sure which direction it’s going to
go but I hope you enjoy !!

The next chapter should be out soon!!

After torturing and murdering Ginny Weasley, Hermione whistled. A few seconds later
Greyback left Ron’s holding cell covered in blood.

“I’m finished with her, she’s all yours.” Greyback licked his lips and entered the room.
“You’ve cut off all the good bits.” He shouted. “Her tits are in the corner. Her hearts in that
corner, her fingers are thrown around somewhere and her face is in my hand.” Hermione held
the skin of Ginny’s face up to hers. “How do I look Draco?” She smiled maliciously.

“Looking like a true Weasley there Granger. Ginger hair really suits you.”Draco chucked
beside her. Running his fingers through Ginny’s hair.

“That is an insult, I’d never want to be associated with a Weasley every again.” She scoffed.
Sticking her finger though the eye hole, Hermione started swinging Ginny’s face around. A
bored expression on her face. “What do we do now?” She asked. Ginny’s hair whipping in
front of her like a tumbleweed.

“I’m to be at a meeting with the American minister, you’ll have to have fun without me.”
Draco said stepping closer and swiping his thumb across her cheek. A drop of blood on his
thumb, he sucked it off. Hermione threw her arms around his neck and kissed him.

A throat cleared behind them and they reluctantly pulled apart.

“Dear nephew, your meeting is in five minutes, shouldn’t you be off?” Asked Bellatrix. “Yes
Auntie, I’m going now.” With one last kiss on Hermione’s lips Draco apparated away.

Only Bellatrix and Hermione left in the hall. Bella poked her head into Ginny’s holding cell.
“You killed the Weasley girl?” She looked down at Hermione’s hands seeing Ginny’s face.
Her features growing enraged. “And you disfigured her? Why, I wanted to do it, I was
promised, it was supposed to be my turn to play, not yours, you’re nothing but a filthy
mudbloo-“

Hermione raised her hand, smacking Bellatrix across the face. “You dare talk to me like that
bella.” Bellatrix mumbled something under her breath. “What was that? I didn’t hear you.”
Hermione questioned.
“I said.” She sneered. “I’m sorry for my outburst, it won’t happen again.” Hermione tapped
her chin. “You better hope it doesn’t, otherwise it’ll be your head I take off next.” With that
Hermione left the room and walked down the hall.

Screams could be heard coming from a room. Hermione went in that direction, she just
couldn’t help herself, the sounds of her enemies screaming was always a rush to her.

When she entered the room, there with a blade in her hand was Pansy Parkinson. Below her
was Astoria Greengrass. Astoria was writhing and screaming incoherently. Only a few words
could be made out.

“Sorry-didn’t -I want-be-dark side.”

“You wouldn’t call it the dark side if you truly wanted to be one of us. You would call it the
right side.” Running the blade across Astoria’s forehead pansy promptly scalped the girl.
Astoria continued to scream. She was trying to place her hands on the wound. She couldn’t of
course, Pansy had chopped her hands off a few days ago when they found Astoria trying to
contact Potter.

Hermione walked further into the room, taking the blade from pansy’s hands and slitting
Astoria’s throat. Pansy gasped and tried to take the blade away from Hermione. “That wasn’t
for you to do, she was mine to kill.” She wined. “Her screaming was annoying me.”
Hermione replied with a bored face, shrugging her shoulders.

“What is that in your hand?” Pansy asked.

“Oh this? The only part that’s left of Ginny Weasley.” Hermione threw Ginny’s face towards
Pansy. She caught it by the hair and laughed. “I’ve got to hand it to you Granger, you’re
amazing at torture, was she alive when you cut it off?” Pansy asked, engrossed in what
Hermione had to say.

“Yes, what do you take me for? I like when torture is done at it’s finest. She was alive, she
screamed bloody murder until I silenced her. I loved the feeling, watching the skin tear from
her head, I ripped out her heart and chopped off her fingers. Ginny always worshipped her
breasts so I took them off too, it was erotic.” Hermione was salivating just thinking about it.

“And let me guess.” Pansy cut into Hermione’s internal euphoria. “Draco watched the whole
time?” Pansy had a shit eating grin on her face. She knew the answer. “Of course he was. But
wait until you hear what we did to Ron.” Hermione laughed maliciously.

Before she could spill the details, Theo Nott came into the room. “The dark lord is requesting
your presence Granger.”

“Right, well pans, I’ll come and find you later and we’ll discuss the Ron situation.”
Hermione said turning on her heel to leave the room. “Oh I know all about what happened in
Weasley’s room.” Theo said, hiding a laugh. “Okay then Nott, you can fill pans in on the
details and I’ll show her my memories later.” Hermione grinned.

“You better Granger!” Pansy shouted as Hermione left the room, walking towards the study.
When she arrived at the study, she knocked on the door three times. Voldemort told her to
enter. “My lord, Nott said you wished to see me?” She said in a questioning voice.

“He was correct, please take a seat.” He gestured to the chair in front of him. Hermione took
the seat. Sitting with her head held high and her back straight.

“My dear Granger, you’ve been the best asset to my death eaters, if I may, I’d like to say
you’re the best death eater I’ve had since Bellatrix.” Hermione’s mouth frowned before she
could stop it, the dark lord caught it and chuckled. “Do not frown, the only reason bella is
better is because she’s been on the hunt.”

Now Hermione didn’t try to hide her frown. “The hunt, my lord?” She asked. “Yes, the hunt.
It will be a group of you in the manor fields, we will set some prisoners free, of course there
are wards so they can not completely escape. You will pick your team, the aim is to kill as
many prisoners in the worst ways you can think of.”

Hermione’s pulse quickened, the thought of a murder spree exciting her. She knew exactly
who her team would be and she couldn’t wait to tell them. “I see you’re excited about this, I
do love your devotion.” Said Voldemort, rising from his seat. He walked over and stood
behind Hermione’s chair. Taking a wayward curl into his hand. He curled it around his finger
and watched it spring back to its natural shape towards her face.

Leaning down and whispering into her ear. “There will be a prisoner tied to a tree. If you find
them and kill them, you may have Bellatrix’s seat next to me and Draco.” Hermione’s grin
grew until she was smiling like the Cheshire Cat.

“I’ll do it my lord, I’ll kill every last one them.” Voldemort kissed her cheek. “Very well,
Severus will take you and your team to the gardens after the meeting this afternoon, you may
leave.” Hermione got out of her chair and left the room feeling dizzy with absolute delight.
 Chapter 3
Chapter Notes

So sorry for my inconsistency with posting I’ve been so busy with work so I’ve split
chapter 3 into 2 chapters, currently finishing chapter 4 and it will be uploaded shortly!!

It was midday when the meeting started. Hermione could barely focus. Her mind was
thinking of the many ways she was going to kill all the prisoners.

Voldemort’s voice cut through her racing thoughts. “Miss Granger, please select your team.”

Hermione stood, looking around the table.

“Pansy dear, how about it?” Hermione asked. Pansy smiled seductively and stood. “I’d be
delighted to be on your team darling.” Pansy made her way over to Hermione.

“Theo? You up for a challenge?” Hermione asked. Theo grinned. “You know I’m always up
for a bit of cleansing love.” Theo made his way to Pansy grabbing her around the waist.

Hermione contemplated a little. But then her eyes landed on one person in particular. “Daph?
Are you going to be weak like your sister or are you going to show us what a good little death
eater you can be?” Daphnes eyes tightened but she stood up. “Astoria was weak, I’ll bring
honour to our family name.” Hermione smiled sarcastically. “Let’s hope you do Daph,
because if you don’t show me you can do this I’ll string you up in the drawing room and rip
out your lungs.” Daphne nodded and made her way toward Hermione and the others.

“You’ve got two more to pick from Miss Granger, make it quick, we have not got all day.”
Severus said, looking as bored as ever. Hermione moved her eyes away from him and
continued looking down the long table. “Pucey? Zabini? Want to stretch your legs and slit
some throats?” Both boys cheered and made their way to the group.

Once they were all standing together, Voldemort spoke up. “You’ve picked a fine team. Good
girl, I’m very proud of you. I hope your team shows strength and does not let you down. I
hope everyone proves themselves today.” When saying that he pointedly looked at Daphne,
who recoiled behind Adrian.

“I promise my lord, if anyone on my team let’s me down, I’ll have their heart for dinner.”
Hermione said, a serious expression on her face, causing a few death eaters to look down at
the table top.

“Severus, take them to the garden, get them set up, they’ll start in 10 minutes.” Snape
nodded, flicking his finger at the group to follow him out the room.
They followed him out, through the manor and into the garden in silence. Once they were in
the garden, Daphne gasped. Tied to a pole that had a start flag attached to it was Astoria.
Hermione turned sharply and stared at Daphne. Daphne cowered under Hermione’s
scrutinising stare.

When Hermione looked back out into the garden she saw the prisoners lined up. There was
Seamus Finnegan, Molly Weasley, Padma Patil, Lavender Brown, professor Slughorn,
George Weasley, Parvati Patil and Hannah Abbot.

Her main targets were the Weasley’s. She wanted a full set. Fred and Charlie were already
dead, tortured by Hermione and then given to Greyback to be mauled by him and his pack.
Bill was obliterated by Draco, Hermione and Theo. Pansy took care of fleur. Percy changed
his name and fled the country until Adrian found him, brought him back and Hermione aided
in helping Adrian chop him up bit by bit until he was just a head and torso. Hermione took
care of Ginny and Ron. The only Weasley left was Arthur and he was in hiding with the rest
of the order. So to kill Molly and George would make her one off of a full set.

Pansy whispered something that Hermione didn’t quite catch. “Hmm?” Pansy rolled her eyes.
“I said Brown is mine.” Now Hermione rolled her eyes. “Is this because she said your hair
was too short and it made your face look round in fourth year?” Pansy scoffed. “Of course it
is Granger. You think I’d let her get away with insulting me, think again.”

Hermione chuckled softly. Pansy and her Grudges. A movement to the side caught her eye.
Voldemort called her over with his index finger.

She made her way over. Stopping a foot in front of him. “Remember what I said, killing the
prisoner tied to the tree will be your reason to have Bella’s seat. Do not disappoint me and
grow a conscience.” He bought his hand up, cupping her cheek. “I’d really hate to have to kill
my favourite.” Hermione leaned into his hand.

“No need to worry my lord, I’d walk through hell and back to make you proud.” His thumb
stroked her cheek. Sharp nails softly dragging down her temple.

“That’s what I like to hear, now go and make me proud, young death eater.” He kissed her
forehead, hand moving from her cheek.

Hermione turned around to go back to her group but a hand caught her shoulder. Gripping the
hand tightly and spinning around to face the one it belonged to.
She came face to face with Bellatrix. “I hope you die out there mudblood, you’re no match
for someone like me, your blood is filthy and you’ve no right to be here.”

Hermione’s grip on Bella’s hand tightened, hearing the knuckles pop. “Is that all you can say
to me Bella dear?” Bella’s face twisted with fury. “Yes, yes, my blood is filthy, blah, blah,
any other insults in that thick skull of yours?” Snatching her hand back, Bella sneered at
Hermione and walked away.

“Granger! Get over here!” Pansy shouted. Hermione made her way to Pansy who was being
held tightly by Theo. He was whispering in her ear and stopped once Hermione was next to
them.
“Hermione love?” Theo questioned. “Yes Theodore?” Hermione smiled sweetly at him.

“Promise you’ll leave some of the killing for less skilled persons of the group?” He looked at
her with faux sad eyes as popped out his bottom lip.

“You wish, I think myself a professional assassin.” She laughed. “I’ll make you a deal, how’s
that sound?” Theo’s eyes grew wide with excitement. “Go on.” He prompted her.

“Remember what we did to Bill?” Theo laughed. “Of course I remember, we tore the skin off
of his body piece by piece, healed him, shredded his muscles and then blew him up.” Theo’s
eyes were glossy by the end of his explanation, remembering the rush he felt.

“Well, how about we leave Finnegan until the end, and we kill him together? How’s that
sound?” Theo removed his arms from around Pansy and embraced Hermione. Kissing her
cheek. “That sounds absolutely wonderful, I’ll lead him to the greenhouse trap him, you wait
for me in there and we kill him, sound good?”

“Extremely.” Hermione smirked. “I have a task first from the dark lord, but keep Finnegan
alive until the very end and we’ll do it.” Theo let go of Hermione, kissing the top of her head
and going back to pansy’s side.

Sparks shot in the air and they all turned to face Severus.

“Adrian, Blaise and pansy you will take the left side of the gardens.” The three made there
way over to the left staring point.

“Granger, Theodore and Daphne, you three will take the right side. When you see the blue
sparks the prisoners will run and hide, when you see the orange sparks that is when you will
begin. Do I make myself clear?” Snape stood tall in his black robes, his face was the picture
of boredom.

They all nodded and Severus turned to face the prisoners. He spit them into two groups on
the left side was the Patil sisters, lavender brown and Hannah abbot. On the right was Molly
and George Weasley, professor slughorn and Seamus Finnegan.

Hermione and Theo both looked at each other with matching grins. Theo put his arm around
her shoulder and whispered in her ear. “Ready to have some fun killer?”

Hermione’s grin split wide. “I’m ready to fucking kill every last one of them, you’re just
along for the ride.” Theo chuckled darkly. “I’m guessing your after the Weasleys?” Hermione
looked over at them locking eyes with Molly who wore a look of disgust on her face. “You
guessed right, I’m going to rip Molly’s throat out.”

Theo looked down at her. “May I have the honour of killing George?” Hermione pushed him
in his chest playfully. “No you may not kill him, you can torture him but don’t kill him.”
Theo put on his faux sad face again. “But that means you’ll be killing three out of the four,
how’s that fair.”
Hermione chuckled. “You can kill Finnegan, I’ll just help with the rest. Deal?” Hermione
offered her hand to Theo and he took it, shaking it dramatically and bowing. “As you wish
your highness.”

Before Hermione could respond with her own joking quip the blue sparks shot in the air and
the prisoners began to run. The group began cheering. Adrian was the loudest, clapping and
rubbing his hands together excitedly. Hermione could only smile at their enthusiasm.

Once the prisoners were out of sight, snape shot the orange sparks into the sky.

Let the games begin.

 Chapter 4
Chapter Notes

I am so sorry for how long it’s been, I’ve been dealing with my mental health but I’m so
happy to finally be posting chapter 4 for you guys !!

The moment Hermione started running she realised that the manor garden was much larger
than she expected. It was a challenge to find a prisoner.

She was running for five minutes before she heard the snap of a twig. She turned to the side
to see that Molly Weasley had fallen over behind a tree. Her feet moved faster and she was
beside Molly grabbing her hair roughly, her fingernails digging into Molly’s scalp. The
plump woman screamed and thrashed about in the leaves.

Wanting her to shut up, Hermione smashed her face into the ground repeatedly. When she
pulled Molly’s head back up she had dirt all over her face and blood dripping down her
forehead.

“Hermione, stop this madness. You are not a bad person, just remember who you are.”
Laughing at this bizarre woman, Hermione nearly had to double over.

“Oh Molly, how naive can you be. This is the real Hermione Granger. I’m not some little girl
you can boss around. I’m not Ginny.” Hermione covered her mouth with one hand, smiling
behind it. “Oh of course I’m not, she’s dead.”

Molly’s eyes went wide and her face turned pale. “You’re lying, she- no, she’s not dead.
Especially not by the hands of her best friend.” Hermione couldn’t contain her laughter. “Best
friend my arse, I hated the girl. She was so insecure, always thinking I was shagging Harry
behind her back. She was an annoying little girl and I’m glad I killed her.” Molly was
weeping now, hands covering her face and sniffling.

“You’re a monster Hermione Granger and I hope you burn in hell for the sins you commit.”
Hermione rolled her eyes. “I can’t wait to see you there Mol.” And with that Hermione slit
Molly’s throat and watched as Molly Weasley took her last breath, still with a look of disgust
and shock on her face. And just for good measure Hermione plunged her hand into Molly’s
open throat, ripping it out and throwing it beside her.

Hermione’s smile was cut short when she saw Theo running toward a figure. “This way
killer.” He shouted and Hermione ran towards him.

The figure was George Weasley, he was much taller than Hermione but roughly the same
height as Theo. Theo tackled him to the ground. George started fighting him. Quick thinking
and Hermione shot a crucio at him hoping to not hit Theo.
George began writhing on the floor, his body bending in inhumane ways. Theo took out his
wand and did the same, hitting George with three powerful crucio’s. Blood and snot began
dripping from George’s nose.

“No, Stop now Theo, I told you, I want to kill him.” Hermione said, grabbing Theo’s wrist
and moving it down to his side. “Sorry love, I got carried away for a second there.” Said
Theo, looking sheepish as he scratched the back of his head.

George continued to writhe on the floor, blood now seeping out of his eyes. Hermione lifted
her wand as well as the crucio, bending low and straddling George’s chest. “George dear?”
She questioned. He tried to push her off but was too weak.

“You, We always knew there was something wrong with you.” George stuttered. Hermione
laughed. “Wrong with me? No Georgie, there’s nothing wrong with me, I just know where
my power and mind belong. The order did not deserve to exploit me or my talent, I was just a
pawn in their little game of success.” She took a blade out of her holster and held it over
George’s heart.

“You see, they didn’t care whether I lived or died. As long as I was creating battle plans and
working myself day and night to help them win a war they were never meant to win, they
thought nothing of me but a young girl with a brilliant mind.” She pushed the blade down,
watching as it slowly entered a few layers of his skin.

“Granger is better off with us, yes she’s brilliant but here-“ Theo paused and kneeled down
beside George, grabbing a fist full of his hair and bringing his face closer. “Here, she’s
worshiped, admired even, we take good care of her. She’s the best thing that has happened to
us. You fuckers just used her, not completely understanding how incredible she is. With her
you could have won the war, you didn’t appreciate her enough and now she has a family, a
real family.” Theo roughly let go of George’s hair, watching as his head bounced off the
ground.

“This is where I belong George, this is my family.” Hermione pushed the blade deeper into
George’s chest, screaming in pain George tried to grasp her wrist. Theo was quicker, George
now lay with his head in between Theo’s knees and his wrists bound to the ground above his
head.

“You had a family, us, the Weasley’s, we took you in and treated you as our own and you
betray us like this? How could you Hermione?” Laughing at him Hermione pushed the blade
deeper.

“Betray you? You are one to talk about betrayal. Remember how you betrayed Ronald when
you fucked me that Christmas he declared his love for me?” George tried to turn his head
away, his cheeks blooming pink. “That was a mistake we were drunk.” George mumbled.
Hermione laughed.

“Oh trust me it was a mistake, but I wasn’t drunk and neither were you, do not lie to
yourself.” Theo squeezed his knees and George’s neck began to pop.
“Can we kill him already? We still have two more people to get too.” Theo said, his voice
sounding bored. “Alright then, bye Georgie.” And with that Hermione pulled the blade out of
George and forcefully plunged it into his chest repeatedly until he lay their lifeless.

Removing herself from George’s chest with the help of Theo, they both took off to find
slughorn.

******

“Honestly Pucey, I told you I wanted to kill lavender.” Came pansy’s shrill voice. Adrian just
looked at her smiling. “Pans, I wanted to kill her too. Listen, I slept with her in sixth year and
she went around the whole school telling everyone I was the worst sex she had, call me petty
but you know yourself I’m amazing in bed.”

Pansy looked at him with faux disgust. “Please stop reminding me we ever slept together, that
was a traumatic time for me.” She batted her eyelashes at him both laughing with each other.
Adrian wrapped his arm around her shoulder. “Come on then love, let’s find someone else
and i promise you I’ll let you kill them.” Pansy widened her eyes to make her look like a
puppy dog and pouted her lip. “You promise?” She asked.

“You learnt that trick from Theo didn’t you?” Adrian chuckled. “As a matter of fact I did.”
She pushed at his chest. “Now let’s go.” Adrian kissed Pansy’s forehead. She wiped it away
with the back of her hand.

With one last kick to lavenders now dismembered head, Adrian and pansy ran off to find
someone else.

********

“Please Daphne, don’t do this, we were friends, you came to me in sixth year when I found
out about your dark mark, I told you I’d get you out of it, I still can, just escape with me.”
Hannah pleaded.

“I can’t Hannah, they killed my sister.” Daphne cried. “Astoria is dead, I’m the last of the
Greengrass family, I’d rather live on the wrong side where I know I’ll survive than die on the
right side and never see Astoria’s grave again.”

“But she’s not even buried, she was tied to a flag pole and strung up. How can you still be on
their side?” Cried Hannah.

A tear dropped down onto Hannah’s face.

“I’ll bury her myself once this is over, I’m sorry Hannah.” With a kiss on Hannah’s cheek
Daphne shot the killing curse at her.

“Well done.” Daphne shot round to see Hermione leaning against a tree. “I won’t tell the dark
lord what you said about being on the wrong side.” She said, using her fingers as quotation
marks. “I’ll even help you bury your traitor of a sister, no headstone for traitors though.”
Daphne’s eyes grew wide. “But if you step one foot out of line Greengrass, I’ll kill you
myself, do you understand?”

Daphne wiped her tears and stood. “I understand Hermione, what you heard, I didn’t mean
any of it i prom-“ Hermione cut her off. “Don’t lie to me, I know you meant all of it but you
still killed her so this stays between us, now you can help me and Theo kill slughorn.”
Hermione turned around walking in the direction of a very male agitated scream.

“Oh and daph?” Daphne stopped in her tracks. “Yes Hermione?” She asked.
“Stay on your own side yeah? Those three won’t be happy you killed one of their prisoners.”
Daphne sniffled. “She bumped into me, I thought it was better to just get rid of her.”
Hermione turned around, looking Daphne up and down. “Good girl, now follow me.”

Daphne caught up with Hermione and they both walked together to Theo.

*********
“Zabini!” Shouted Pansy. “Just kill one of them already, for the love of the dark lord, Stop
playing around.” Blaise just looked at her with a blank look on his face.

“Pans, the perfect killing takes time, I’m calculating in my head which one I actually want to
kill and which one I’m going to let you kill.” Said Blaise. “Also, do not rush me woman.” He
turned around looking head on at the Patil sisters.

“Padma, sweet little padma. Remember that time in sixth year, dark little alcove, you on your
knees.” Blaise smiled at her sweetly. “My cum dripping from your face and tongue. Now that
is a memory I will never forget.” Padma just scowled at him, from her seated position on the
floor. Blaise had tied both girls together back to back and gaged them.

“I could never kill a girl with your talents.” He bent low running his index finger down
Padma’s cheek. “Pans, darling.” Blaise called over his shoulder.

“Finally zabini.” Pansy marched past Adrian to where padma was, pulling the girl by her
long black hair. She didn’t move much and pansy grew frustrated. “For the sake of my sanity,
untie her Blaise!” She shrieked.

With a flick of his wand both girls were untied and no longer gagged. Pansys grip on padma’s
hair tightened. Parvati sprung to her feet and began running. “Oh I love a good chase.” Said
Adrian. Both boys began running after Parvati leaving Pansy alone with padma.

“I’ve always hated you, I’ve never really had a reason to hate you I just do.” Pansy tugged on
padma’s hair. She whimpered.

“Just kill me already.” Said padma, with as much courage as she could muster. “Do not tell
me what to do.” Said an angry Pansy. Pushing padma to the ground, she straddled the girl.
Her knees on Padma’s forearms. “Do not order me around, I’m much more powerful than
you.” Pansy put her wand to padma’s throat.
“You’re only more powerful because you have a wand.” Pansy laughed. Putting away her
wand. “You think magic makes me stronger?” She questioned. “Oh darling, you’re so wrong,
I was trained in hand to hand combat by Hermione Granger. That girl can kill a witch or
wizard with her bare hands.” Padma’s eyes went wide.

“Would you like a demonstration?” Pansy wrapped her hands around a struggling padma’s
throat. Squeezing hard. Padma thrashed around but pansy’s grip never wavered.

“You see, magic does not make me stronger than you.” Pansy laughed. “Hermione Granger
makes me stronger than you.” Padma’s eyes were turning a beautiful shade of red, her blood
vessels popping beneath Pansy strong hold on her throat.

“That girl is powerful, she has so much anger and passion inside of her that anyone is a
target, including me.” Padma’s body slowly started to calm down. “But you see, she does not
hate me, but the way she hates your side, the things that your side did to her make our side
the better place to be.” Pansy squeezed harder now even though Padma was no longer
breathing. Hermione was her best friend and thinking about what the order did to her made
her venomous.

With Padma dead, she stood, taking out her wand and slashing it through the air.
Blood splattered all over her face. Smiling down at not one but two pieces of Padma. She had
sliced her in half from head to toe.

Wiping the blood from her eyelids she followed in the direction of a screaming Parvati.
******

Slughorn was no where to be seen, the three of them had been looking for what felt like hours
for the stout man. They were standing still talking amongst themselves about splitting up to
find him when leaves crunched beside them.

Hermione shushed Theo and Daphne. Listening, the wind was soft and the leaves
surrounding them blew gracefully in the wind.

Quiet footsteps could be heard from behind them. Quick thinking, Hermione shot a chain
binding spell in the direction of the footsteps. There was a thud on the ground but no one
appeared to have fallen.

Theo whispered a spell under his breath and there, chained to the ground was slughorn, a
wand lay about two inches from his fingertips.

“Now where the fuck did old sluggy get a wand from?” Theo questioned.

Hermione made her way closer, picking up the wand and inspecting it. “Daph, where’s your
wand?” Daphne reached into her wand holster but found nothing, quickly looking back at
Hermione with so much fear in her eyes.

“I don’t know how he got it, I had it on me the whole time.” She was confused but before she
had time to process it Theo had grabbed her by the throat and pushed her back up against a
tree.
“Just like your filthy blood traitor sister aren’t you, hmmm?” His face was so close to
Daphne’s, their noses were touching.
“No, I didn’t give it to him I swea-“ Theo cut her off slamming her against the tree.

“Don’t fucking lie to me Daph, we all know you hate being here, you’re a worthless witch.
You’re undeserving of your magical abilities.” Daphne’s eyes filled with tears. With an
unknown sense of strength she pushed Theo off of her and charged towards slughorn who
was wriggling on the ground.

Hermione, who was watching this whole scene unravel just continued to watch as Daphne
wandlessly conjured a long sword, lifting it up into the air and stabbing it through slughorns
face, right between his eyes. She didn’t let up, she just kept going, screaming random words
out.

Hermione saw as Daphnes anger got the best of her, this type of anger was needed, this is
how she would finally show Daphne that she belonged with the death eaters and the dark
lord, not the pathetic order.

The open space around them was suddenly quiet. Theo and Hermione watched Daphne
slowly turn around to face them. Her body and face covered in blood, she looked like a true
warrior. Sword still in her hand she made her way over to Theo.

“Here, take it.” She said holding the sword out to him. Theo stood there in complete shock.
No one thought she was capable of such a gruesome kill. “Still a worthless, undeserving
witch now Theo?” Theo shook his head. Hermione rolled her eyes and scoffed.

“She’s not scary Theo, you can close your mouth.” Theo hadn’t realised his mouth was
hanging wide open. He closed it with an audible snap. Teeth clanging together.
Hermione turned her full attention to Daphne then. “I hate to say this but you’ve made me
very proud today, two kills and it’s barely even sundown yet.” Hermione began to circle the
blood covered girl. “You have the potential to be something great. You have two choices,
one.” Daphne stood taller. “You can admit right here to just me and Theo that you thoroughly
enjoyed killing sluggy.” Daphne did nothing but blink. “Or two, you can die here because
killing the opposition of this on going war does absolutely nothing for you.”

Wiping the blood soaked hair from Daphne’s forehead, Hermione held Daphne’s face in her
hands. “It’s time to decide sweetheart. Are you going to live because killing gives you a rush
that’s beyond magic itself.” She paused looking into Daphne’s eyes. “Or, are you going to die
and be placed in a nameless grave like your sister?” Daphne pulled her face out of
Hermione’s hands.

“I choose to live.” She said. Her face confident as well as her stance.
“That’s not enough for us love, tell us how it made you feel.” Theo whispered in her ear.

Daphne looked at Hermione, who smiled and nodded her head as encouragement to carry on.
“It made me feel powerful, in control. It was like I was finally becoming the person I was
meant to be. I watched as every slice of the sword cut open every inch of his face and all that
I could think of was, I was made to be this, to do this. In that moment I felt like I belonged,
that I really am where I’m supposed to be.”
Theo and Hermione grinned at each other.
“Welcome home Daph.” They said in unison.

“Now you two find Seamus, Theo I’ll meet you in the greenhouse in twenty minutes, be there
with him.” Hermione gave Daphne her wand back and Theo shook his head and gestured for
Daph to follow him.

Hermione watched them run until they were out of sight. Now she would make her way to
where she could feel strong magic pulling her. To find the prisoner the dark lord told her was
tied to a tree.

She ran and ran never getting tired, the magical pull was stronger with each step she took,
never once looking in any direction other than head on.

She stopped, the pull had gone. Looking around she didn’t see anything, that was until she
turned slightly to the left and there was the prisoner tied to the tree, as she got closer she
couldn’t help but stifle a gasp.

*******

“Adrian, hold her still!” Blaise shouted.

“Adrian hold her still.” Mocked Adrian with an annoyed expression on his face as they both
struggled to tie Parvati to a tree. She fought with everything she had, even scratching both
boys faces with her fingernails.

“Grab your wand mate, should make this quicker.” Blaise rolled his eyes at Adrian.
“If it was that easy don’t you think I would have done it by now. This girl is freakishly
strong.” Parvati kicked her legs out, hitting Adrian in his shin.

“Ow, you bitch!” Adrian exclaimed. “My fucking shin, Zabini what’s the spell Granger uses
to chain people?” Blaise looked confused for a minute but then it clicked. With a quick flick
of his wand Parvati was chained to the tree.

“You’re both scum.” Parvati spat. Blaise and Adrian both laughed. “Oh sweet girl, scum? Is
that the best you’ve got?” She glared at Blaise. “Your mothers a whore Zabini, and the order
was proud to rid the world of her.” Blaise saw red. How dare she speak of his mother in that
way.

“Get her right arm Pucey.” Blaise announced. Adrian grabbed Parvati’s right arm and Blaise
grabbed her left. “On the count of three pull as hard as you can. One, two, three.” Both men
pulled at the screaming girls arms. Ripping them right out of their sockets. Her left arm came
right off into Blaise’s hands whilst her right was only dislocated.

Blaise took the left arm by the shoulder and smacked Parvati around her face with her own
hand. “Don’t ever talk about my mother that way.” Parvati probably couldn’t hear him over
how loud she was screaming but he felt he got the message across to her.

“Fucking hell Zabini, I like your style.” Adrian was grinning at Blaise his face full of extreme
pride. Pulling a large blade from its holster, Blaise shoved it through Parvati’s stomach.
“Give us a hand here Pucey.” Adrian didn’t have to be told twice, pulling out his own blade
and slicing it through her side. Both boys continued this until they heard someone clear their
throat.

They looked behind them to see Pansy smiling at them. “Good job boys, but you should see
what I did to Padma.” Her smile grew wide. “What did you do Pans?” Adrian asked as he
pulled his blade out of Parvati’s dead body. Blaise did the same.

Pansy told them exactly what she did, how she did it and how the Patil twins were now the
Patil triplets. Both boys congratulated her. Kissing her cheeks and ruffling her hair. Pansy
was always outspoken and a little scary but the boys though of her as their little sister,
someone they were prone to protect. But pansy’s big kill made them proud.

“Last one on our list is Abbot, who gets to kill her?” Blaise asked. Pansy’s face changed then,
a look of disappointment.
“I passed her on the way here to you, she’s already dead. I’m not completely sure who did it
but it was quick and painless, no blood or anything, my guess is the killing curse.” The three
of them looked at each other with knowing looks.

“Daphne.” They all said with the same dissatisfaction. “We should make our way back to the
starting point then, no one left to kill.” Again all of them were disappointed but Pansy was
the first to walk back. The boys followed behind her.

“Tell us more about killing Padma.” Adrian said excitedly.

********

It was her.

Well not her exactly but an old version of her.

It was the Hermione Granger that belonged to the order. She looked young. Worn out and
tired. It was the Hermione Granger that first came to the dark lord. Nothing to how powerful
and full of life she was now.

“Hermione?” Said the Hermione chained to the tree. “Hermione help me, help yourself,
please.” Her eyes watered. Her body looked bruised, beaten. She remembered why she
looked like that. How the bruises and the scars came to be on her body.

“You are not Hermione Granger, I am Hermione Granger.” The real Hermione put her wand
in its holster and walked closer. It was her, but it wasn’t.
When she looked in a mirror this is not who she saw. This former shell was who she used to
be.

“Go back to the order, they need you. You do not belong here, you know this.” Hermione
grabbed her by the throat.
“Never. I would never return to the order, not after what they did to me, to us, or do you not
remember?” The other Hermione tried to speak but the grip on her throat was too strong.
Hermione’s grip released a little and her former self began speaking.

“Of course I remember, but they only did it to protect you from yourself, they saw it before
we did, the growing darkness inside you. You know yourself you weren’t what you used to
be.” Hermione scoffed at her former self.

“Protect me.” She whispered. “Protect me? They locked me in a room for years, torturing me
countless times, for hours, cruciatus after cruciatus, telling me it was for my on good. Moody
and shacklebolt made me write up battle plans as one of them would shoot the cruciatus at
me. If I fought back they would pin me to the ground until blood came out of my ears and
eyes.” She was breathless, her whole body shaking with rage.

“How I survived I’ll never know, but if they thought doing that would cure me of the
darkness. It made me embrace it all the more. It made me who I am today.” She stepped away
from her former self. Her back turning. She would not let anyone see her tears not even
herself.

“You know they only wanted the best for you. They loved you Hermione. The torture was a
good thing. A few more sessions and you would have been back to normal.” She turned
quickly. Face to face with the old Hermione.

“They did not love me, they exploited me for their own twisted satisfaction, they used me and
that’s all they would ever do, use me until they won the war. What would I have been left
with if they did? Nothing, I’d look exactly like you but older. I’d have the same hatred I feel
for them now, but it would be so much worse.” She took a breath and continued. “They
would have another war on their hands, one led by me, I’d destroy them one by one for what
they did to me. Everyone knew what was happening and no one helped. They heard me
scream and beg for peace or death and no one, Except.” Her breath caught in her throat, she
wouldn’t talk about that now, She wiped her tears and stood tall.

“But now, now they can see the true Hermione Granger. The one they tried to torture into
submission, she’s gone, dead. She’ll never come back, they hear my name and they fear it.
That’s how it’s supposed to be, how it always should have been. My name will ensure fear
into every witch or wizard that hears it, they will cower at the thought of me, see me in their
nightmares wishing they could rid their brains of the memories of me.” Somehow she felt
taller, more powerful than ever.

“The old Hermione isn’t dead, I’m right in front of you, you see me. Let me go, help the
order win the war.” The old Hermione looked her in the eyes and for one spit second she felt
like the broken, beat down girl in front of her. But it only lasted a split second. Her grin grew
wide.

“The old Hermione is dead and gone.” And with no hesitation she shot the killing curse right
through the heart of her former self. Again she felt more powerful than ever before. Because
that part of her was truly gone, she could now live up to her true potential without her past
looming in the back of her brain.
She took one last look at her former self and watched as her features changed. Her eyes never
left as every detail and body part formed into a completely different person.

There in front of her was the lifeless body of Kingsley shacklebolt. Her eyes grew wide and
her grin was from ear to ear.
She moved closer to his body, her wand to his throat and with a precise flick of her wand his
head rolled onto the ground. She picked it up.

With shacklebolts head under her arm she made her way to the greenhouse.

********

When she arrived at the greenhouse, Seamus was on the floor and Daphne and Theo stood
over him with their wands. The waves of pain shot through Seamus’ body. His face was
scrunched up and his fists and feet were clenched. He didn’t make a sound though. As if he
was trying to fight off the cruciatus. Hermione personally knew that look.

“Don’t fight it Finnegan, you’re dying either way.” Theo mocked. Laughing at himself.
“Release him, both of you.” They both turned to look at Hermione.

“Where the fuck did you get shacklebolt’s head from killer?” Theo asked, confusion over
taking his features. “I killed him obviously.” Hermione rolled her eyes.
“Was he the one at the tree?” Asked Daphne. Hermione shot a look at her.
“How did you know about that?” Daphne looked at Theo who was looking at the ground.

“Theodore Tiberius Nott?” Hermione questioned. Theo looked up at her. “Oh not my whole
name. Okay I told her, she asked me where you were going and it just slipped out, I’m sorry
Granger.” Theo made his way over to Hermione and wrapped her in his arms. He bent low
and whispered in her ear. “Are you okay love?” Theo knew exactly what Hermione went
through while living with the order. She hugged him tighter for a few seconds, dropping
kingsleys head on the floor and then let go.

“I’m fine Theo, it’s fine she knows where I went but is that all you told her?” Theo nodded
and removed his arms from her shoulders, planting a kiss to the top of her head.

“That’s disgusting.” Seamus wheezed from the floor. The moment was over and they both
walked over to where he was lying on the floor. “I’m sorry, did we ask for you’re opinion?”
Hermione asked. “Theo love? Did we ask for his opinion?” Theo tapped his chin. “You know
dear, I don’t think we did.” Seamus started coughing blood as he tried to speak again.

“What was that? I couldn’t hear you over that blood spilling out of your mouth.” Said Theo,
kicking Seamus in his side.

“I said, you’re a traitor Hermione.” He wiped his mouth on the back of his hand.
“Yes, so I’ve heard. How’ve your been Finnegan? Still a pathetic waste of my time?” Seamus
spat blood at her, it missed.
“Filthy death eater whore, you’re nothing Hermione, nothing at all. You think you’re so high
and mighty just because you switched sides, you made the wrong choice, the order will win
and you’ll regret every second you spent here when they lock you up in Azkaban.”
Hermione, Daphne and Theo all burst out laughing.

“Very moving Finnegan, I think I’ll switch sides now thanks for that mate.” Theo laughed.
“What a good laugh, fucking hell, tell me another joke.” Theo’s laughter ricocheted off of the
greenhouse walls.

“Theo, come on, I don’t think he’s finished his speech yet, let him finish.” Hermione, who
was also laughing, lightly tapped Theo’s stomach with the back of her hand. Theo tried to
contain his laughter to the best of his ability. Clearing his throat.

“You may continue Finnegan, I sincerely apologise for my rude interruption.” Seamus
scowled at them all.
“Why Seamus, that’s not a very nice look.” Daphne said, still laughing.

“You’re all sick, you’re the ones who deserve to die, the order will punish you all.” He
looked at Hermione then. “You’re a muggleborn, you know the dark lord will kill you once
he’s finished using you.” That made Hermione stop her laughter. She strode over to Seamus
placing her booted foot on his neck. Stamping it down. Hard.

“Remember what umbridge said Mr Finnegan, we must not tell lies.” Hermione put all of her
strength into her leg. Seamus’ hands gripped her ankle but he was too weak to move her.
Theo came up behind her and grabbed her waist, lifting her into the air and placing her on the
ground.

“You promised I could kill him.” He said, looking into her eyes, she rolled hers. “I wasn’t
going to completely kill him Theo, just let him dangle between life and death and then step
off.” Theo took his hands off her waist and crouched down beside Seamus.

“You know what Finnegan, you’ve always gotten on my nerves, now I’m going to burst
yours.” Theo’s wand was slashing through the air. Seamus’ body began to convulse, blood
seeped from his skin like a beautiful red waterfall. Both eyeballs popped out of his skull,
Theo’s grip on his wand got stronger. He shouted bombarda and suddenly it was raining
chunks of Seamus Finnegan. Blood, skin and muscle covered the three of them. Hermione
wiped her cheek, slipping a blood soaked finger into her mouth.

“We mudblood do taste lovely.” Theo followed suit and tasted it himself.
“I’ve had better.” He said, cleaning the remaining blood off of the rest of his fingers.

“Better get a move on and go back, it’s almost dark.” Said Daphne, picking up shacklebolts
head and passing it to Hermione. She nodded at the brunette witch and the three of them left
the greenhouse and started their slow walk back to the start point.
 Chapter 5
Chapter Summary

Chapter 5, finally, I apologize for how long it’s taken me to upload this chapter but i
hope you’re pleased with it. Also a new character has been introduced!!!

When he entered the bathroom, she was in the tub. The water was red.

Her whole body was submerged under the water. When she resurfaced she ran her hands over
her face and eyes.

Draco was stood still, mesmerised by the red water droplets making their way down her body.
He didn’t notice when she looked at him, didn’t notice when she lifted her knees to her chest,
didn’t notice when she stood up, showing her full nakedness in all its glory.

No, there was one particular red stream that slowly descended the curve of her breast, peaked
at her hardened nipple and dropped with elegance into the already red bath tub.

This wasn’t anything others would find attractive but when it came to Hermione Granger she
could make the most menial thing overtly hypnotic.

She stepped out of the tub and walked almost like a predator stalking it’s prey. That’s when
he finally caught her eyes. She viewed him as if he was the last lion in the pride. He stared at
her with the exact same intensity.

She was toe to toe with him now, he could feel her warm breath against his chest. She was
very much smaller than him, her head barely slotted under his chin. She looked up with her
big brown eyes, bright as ever. He knew that look.

“Who’d you kill Granger?” He asked with a smile. Teeth on show.

She grinned right back at him. “Let’s see” she tapped her chin and squinted her eyes as if she
were thinking hard. “There was Molly Weasley.” She placed her hand on his cheek, rubbing
her thumb in slow circles on his cheek bone. He closed his eyes.

“Do you want to know how I did it?” She spoke softly, almost a seductive whisper.

“Tell me.” It sounded like a whimper.

Placing her other hand on his groin, she could feel his cock was almost completely hard. She
slowly dragged her palm over it. He shuddered.
“I gripped her by her hair.” He opened his eyes. His hand shot to the back of her head.
Gripping her hair, it was deliciously painful, he could tell by the way Hermione moaned.

“Continue.”

“I smashed her face into the ground.” He pulled her closer now. He could feel the excitement
through her eyes.

“I told her I killed Ginny, she cried of course, blabbing about me being evil or something or
other.” She rolled her eyes.

“Then?”

“Then, well, I slit her throat.” Draco placed his other hand around her throat and squeezed.

“What did you use?” He asked, licking his lips.

Hermione looked off to the side, seeing the large dagger that she had placed on the dresser.

Draco extracted himself from her and walked over to the dresser, picking up the dagger, he
thumbed the initials carved into the handle.

H.G.M.

“You used this blade? The one I gave you?” He looked at her, his eyes flashing with
possessive hunger.

“What else would I use, I can’t just let it sit looking pretty now can I?” She batted her
eyelashes at him.

He smiled. In quick succession he turned her so her back was up against his body. He put the
dagger to her throat. His other hand rested on her breast.

“Now was it quick and painless or did you make her suffer.” He pushed the blade closer into
her skin, blood trickled down her chest and he watched once more how a little droplet of red
raced down her chest, over the peak of her pink hardened nipple and with a quiet splash onto
the marble floor.

What he didn’t notice was that she was watching through the small bathroom mirror. He
looked down caught her slipping her hand between her thighs. He didn’t stop her though.

“Is that all you did my little mudblood?”She moaned, spreading her legs a little wider so she
could reach between them.

“No.” She whimpered.

“No?” He chuckled into her ear.

“No, I ripped out her throat.” She coated her clit in her wetness and slipped one finger into
herself.
Draco’s hips snapped into her back, her finger slipped out. She didn’t waste anytime, she
reentered not one but two fingers this time. Pumping them slowly.

“And how did it make you feel love? Did your body flood with adrenaline, were you wishing
I was there so we could fuck right next to her dying body?”

She quickened her pace, her fingers speeding up.

“Touch me Draco.” She whispered.

“Answer me.” He demanded, adding a little more pressure to her throat with the dagger.

“Yes, I wished you were there.” She sighed breathily.

Draco removed the dagger from her throat and threw it at the mirror. It smashes into tiny
pieces.

“You’re no longer allowed to look at yourself right now, keep your eyes on me and sit on the
edge of the bath tub.” He turned her around, licking the sweet trail of blood from her
collarbone to her neck.

She did as asked. Staring up at him. He toed off his shoes and began undoing his trousers. He
shoved them down, kicking them to the side.

Without being asked, she tucked her fingers into the waistband of his boxershorts and pulled
them down to his ankles. He also toed them off, watching as she licked her lips, her eyes
were filled with desire.

She took his cock in her hand. Slowly she began pumping him. He couldn’t help the low
moan that rumbled from his chest and out of his mouth. She was still looking up at him, her
pupils blown.

“Fuck, faster Granger.” She complied. Her second hand came up griping the base of him. She
pumped faster, but it wasn’t enough.

“Tighter.” She added pressure.

Her tongue snaked out and she licked the tip, tasting his precum.

Gods, her tongue was so warm and wet. She licked at it one more time, her tongue flat,
before taking him into her mouth.

Not all of him but most. Draco wasn’t one to brag, well actually he was, his cock was a good
size, he was girthy and roughly nine inches but it was not so uncomfortable that she couldn’t
fit it in her mouth.

Her head bobbed up and down, her mouth adjusting. He could feel her swallowing. He put
his hand to the back of her head, she stopped.

“Don’t take your eyes off of me okay love?” She nodded. Her lips smiling around him.
Gripping the back of her hair roughly, enough to elicit a whimper from her.
“Now, stay still, can you do that for me?”
She nodded again.

Draco adjusted his feet so they were a little wider. He controlled her head, starting out slow,
he merely rocked it back and forth a few times. Once he was completely comfortable with
how he was going to do this, he put his other hand behind her head and pulled her forward.
His cock hitting the back of her throat.

She spread her thighs, putting her hand between her legs and entering two fingers. Every time
Draco hit the back of her throat she would slam her fingers Inside herself with the same force
he used.

He was breathless. “Your mouth Granger, fuck me, pull your fingers out and put them in my
mouth.” She reluctantly did as asked, taking her fingers and running them up his chin and
into his mouth. He sucked on them, bit down on them to stop himself from completely
unraveling right there.

Her tears were streaming out of her eyes and down her cheeks, he pulled out of her mouth.
“You good?” He asked, out of breath.

She never took her eyes off of him when she smiled, gripped him again and began to pump
him, her tongue out, her mouth wide open.

His legs were going to give way at any moment, his abdomen rippled and contracted, and
without warning, his cum shot out into her mouth.

She quickly put him all the way in her mouth, gripping his backside, the tip of him in her
throat, and swallowed , he trembled above her, not releasing his vice like grip on her hair. Her
orgasm rippled through her like a tidal wave of euphoria.

One, two, three times his hips gently rocked towards her. She pulled her head back and he let
go of her hair. Running his thumb across her bottom lip and slowly pushing it into her mouth.
She sucked on it then stood up.

“To the bed, now.” She said, her smile devilish.

She took Draco’s hand and led him out of the bathroom and to the bed, he lay on his back
while she climbed on top of him.

Just when she was about to align him with her cunt the door swung open.

“The dark lord would like you down in the meeting room in five minutes.” Came the soft
voice of Luna Lovegood.

Hermione turned her head to look at her, Draco simply stared at the ceiling as if that was the
cause of his anger.

“Oh, did I interrupt, I shall tell the dark lord to wait half an hour so you two can have sex.”
She was about to close the door when Draco chuckled.
“Loony, we’ll be there in five.” She looked at him, her eyes dreamy.

“I sure hope not like that, the dark lord would not want to see your penis Draco, Hermione on
the other hand, well what can I say, your breasts are magnificent, I’m sure he’d love to see
those.” Her smile was full of humor and cheekiness.

“Yes, we know, now stop looking at her breasts and go find your boyfriend.” Luna saluted
them and shut the door.

“She’s very blunt isn’t she.” Hermione said smiling, running her hands up and down his
chest.

“Gotta say Granger, when you first arrived with loony i did not expect her to be so
entertaining.” Hermione smacked his chest.

“Her name is Luna.” She looked at him and the seriousness in her eyes and the thin line of
her lips just made her look adorable, not at all like the powerful scary witch she could be.

He took both of her hands in his and kissed her knuckles.

“You know she likes that nickname right? She absolutely beams at us when we call it her.”
Hermione sighed.

“I know, it’s just she’ll always just be Luna to me, she saved me, she was only 19 Draco, I
wouldn’t be here right now if it wasn’t for her, I owe her my life.” He could see the far away
look in her eyes, he pulled her closer and softly kissed her lips.

He sat up. “Come on Hermione, we have a meeting to attend.” They both got up and headed
to their wardrobe. Whilst dressing a thought hit him. He voiced it.

“Hey Granger?”

“Yes Malfoy?”

“I bumped into Theo on the way here, he told me to ask you about a prisoner and a tree.” His
voice full of confusion.

“Theo needs to learn not to gossip. I’ll tell you after, we’re going to be late.”

They both left their respective wardrobes. Draco wore his usual death eater robes. Hermione
was dressed in thick black boots, black cargo pants and a long sleeved black V-neck T-shirt.

She pulled out a packet of cigarettes from her back pocket, taking one out and placing it
between her lips, with a snap of her fingers it was lit. She returned the pack into her back
pocket.

She pulled the cigarette from her lips and blew out smoke from her nose. Walking over to the
mirror she put the cigarette back between her lips and ran her fingers through her hair.
Draco stalked up behind her. “You know Granger, it’s always nice to offer.” His hand
slithered into her back pockets, grabbing her arse before taking out the packet, he took one
out and came to stand in front of her.

“You’re in my way.” She said, moving left and right, trying to see past his large frame. He
steadied her, placing his hands on her shoulders. Bending down so they were face to face. He
angled his cigarette in front of hers. The paper crackled and the tip of his cigarette burned a
bright red.

“Thanks for your help love.” He took a large inhale, removing the smoke with his fingers and
kissing her cheek. He exhaled and a small white cloud blew around them and into her hair.
She swatted his chest and inhaled her own puff of the smoke. He looked at her with mock
hurt, smiling. Holding one of his hands against his chest as if she’d done real damage.

“Oh please, you’d know if I’d hurt you Draco, trust me you wouldn’t be smiling.” She gave
him a sweet smile and made her way to the door. He followed behind her and they made their
way to the meeting hall.

*******

Once they were all seated, the dark lord started to speak.

“My dearest followers, I’m rather happy to announce that all the prisoners were gracefully
killed. That’s more rebellion members removed from our new world.” He smiled, looking
over everyone.

“Will the following stand.” Everyone was on the edge of their seats. “Mr Zabini, Mr Pucey,
Miss Parkinson, Miss Greengrass, Mr Nott and my ever faithful Miss Granger.” Bella turned
to face Hermione, anger etched into her features. Hermione stared back, her face unbothered.

“Mr Zabini, I’m very pleased with how you dismembered Parvati patil, you have earned a
place higher on the table, swap with Dolohov.” Hermione watched as Blaise moved from
seventh to fourth on right side of the table.

“Mr Pucey, you also aided in the dismembering of the Patil girl but it was your lack of
hesitation to remove Miss Browns head that has earned you a higher seat, swap with Yaxley.”
They both got up, Yaxley grumbling something under his breath and Adrian with a wide grin
on his face, Yaxley now sat at the eighth spot on the table and Adrian sat opposite Blaise,
taking the fourth seat on the left side, Hermione noted that he was two down from her.

“Miss Parkinson, well what can I say, splitting the other Patil sister in half brought a smile to
my face, you may swap with Rodolphus.” They both moved, Pansy taking a the third seat
next to Blaise while Rodolphus moved to the sixth seat. His face red with embarrassment.
“Miss Greengrass, your performance today didn’t reach the standards I would have liked
when you killed the Abbot girl, I have half a mind to throw you out but for your role in
killing the professor you will be staying, sit down.” Daphne sat with her head bent low.

“Mr Nott, you’re a very intelligent man, I’m pleased with the way you discarded the
Finnegan boy, swap with Rabastan.” Rabastan who was second on the table began to protest.
Hermione shot a muffliato at him.

“Do not speak out of turn Rabastan, Theo’s earned his place.” Hermione smiled at him.
“Move.” He got up and bumped Theo’s shoulder on his way, Theo now sat second to Draco
on the right side of the table.

Voldemort turned his serpent eyes on Hermione, smiling up at her like a proud father. “And
you my dear, well, you never fail to amaze me.” Hermione smiled at him from her standing
position. She walked over to him and kissed his cheek.

“For you my lord, I’d do anything.” And she meant every word. He took her hand in his and
stood. “I don’t doubt you assassin, you are my most loyal follower, the power you wield
could rival my own and yet I’ve no doubt in my mind that you would ever use it against me.”
She blushed a bright scarlet at his praise.

“You completed your task, the task set to break you down and yet you still stand here, head
held high and vibrant. Stronger than many men I’ve encountered.” She stood even straighter,
her eyes fixed on his.

“Every kill makes you more powerful, every drop of blood you spill makes you glow, and for
that you will swap seats with Bellatrix.” A chair screeched and Bella stood her wand drawn
on Hermione. Everyone at the table stood. Watching.

Hermione turned around, her face held the look of boredom. “My lord, she’s nothing more
than a mudblood who has enslaved your mind to think she’s worthy. She has no right to sit
next to you at the head of the table, that has been my place for years and I will not give it up
easily.” She sneered at Hermione.

Bellatrix raised her wand higher and threw a hex at her, Hermione simply waved her hand
sending the hex back towards Bellatrix. She deflected it. Rage contoured her features. She
was about to throw another hex when Luna suddenly appeared in between them.

“Back off trixie, hurt her and I promise I’ll make you regret it.” Said Luna, her voice calm,
Hermione couldn’t see her face but she expected it had the same look. Luna always appeared
calm, well not always there was that time when… Hermione was struck from her memory.

“Prey tell what you could do to make me regret anything, you’re a measly, weak little girl.”
Bella smiled, her black teeth on full show.

She saw a sharp green light headed for Luna, who stood with her arms out protectively in
front of Hermione. She grabbed the blonde by her shoulders and pulled her down so that they
were both crouching. A picture frame smashing in the distance. Luna shook her hands off of
her shoulders and stood. Her back straight and her wand aimed precisely. “Stupefy.” She
whisper shouted but Bella deflected that again. Hexes we’re being thrown between the both
of them.

Hermione’s mind was reeling as the six Slytherins and the Ravenclaw stood like a protective
wall in front of her and suddenly, like a magnetic pull, everything faded to darkness.
 Chapter 6
Chapter Summary

Memories
2000

She lay on the cold dungeon ground surrounded by her own blood, snot and urine. Her body
curled into the fetal position. She ached all over. Her mind, her body. Everything hurt.

Moody and Kingsley had just left after four hours of complete and utter torture.

Crucio after crucio after crucio whilst making her write battle plans. And when they felt like
it wasn’t her best plan they’d physically hit her with whatever weapon they had chosen, if she
screamed their next pleasure was hitting her with as many crucio’s they could mutter between
themselves whilst her body was pinned to the floor.

“The darkness that surrounds your magic grows stronger each day, the dark lord has sent out
a search party to retrieve you. He believes you’ll be his undoing.”

“It’s for your own good, we need to evacuate the dark before it consumes you.”

“It’s for your own good. To protect you.”

“It’s for your own good.”

“We aren’t the bad guys Hermione.” Harry had entered the room. “We’re trying to save
you.”

“Do it Potter.” Moody spoke. She wanted to beg him, plead with him, to tell him she was in
pain and couldn’t take any more. But her throat was like sandpaper, her lips barely moved.
She tried to do it with her eyes but without any hesitation or regards for his friends feelings,
the cruciatus slipped past his lips as if he’d been saying it his whole life.

The door opened and the light from the hall hurt her eyes. She tried to squeeze them shut but
the pain was unbearable. It closed and in her clouded line of vision she saw long white blond
hair and fuzzy bright blue eyes and the sad smile that had comforted her the last two years.

“You’re back.” Hermione spoke, her voice broken and cracked. She was severely dehydrated.
Suddenly there was a cold bottle pressed against her lips and she welcomed the iced water.
Swallowing didn’t come easy but she managed two large gulps before she started coughing.
Which made her body writhe on the floor.
A spell was cast over her and the pain subsided a little, enough for her to sit up and see
clearly. Luna was waving her wand cleaning Hermione’s face and the urine from her trousers
was no longer there.

“Hello Hermione.” Luna’s soft voice filled her ears and Hermione relaxed a little.

Luna lifted her hand to Hermione’s swollen cheek. That was done three days ago, when
Hermione tried to fight back. Moody had backhanded her and it left her unconscious for a
whole day. It stung and Luna knew she couldn’t heal it for her, they would get suspicious.

“I don’t know if you’re real Luna, but I want to thank you, for taking care of me.” She said
this every time Luna came into the room, looking into her eyes giving her a slight smile even
if it was just a figment of her imagination, she welcomed the kind and caring way she always
found a way to get into Hermione’s cell. It was the comfort she loved the most.

“Who’s to determine who’s real and who isn’t? Maybe none of us are real and this is all a
dream.” Luna smiled at her.

“If this is all a dream I’d like to wake up now.” Hermione tried to laugh but couldn’t, a tear
stung her cheek.

Luna carefully wiped the tear away. “Soon you’ll wake up and it will all be okay. I promise
you.” She stared into Luna’s caring eyes for a moment.

The door opened again and her eyes snapped away closing in on the large figure closing the
door. They knelt down in front of her and the tear filled eyes of Neville Longbottom were
now in her line of vision.

“Hermione.” He breathed, sniffling. Neville raised his wand quickly and Hermione flinched
back. She knew he wouldn’t hurt her but it was the speed in which he raised his wand that
made her mind flip through the terrible memories of the people she thought loved and cared
for her, torturing her. Telling her it was for her own good. To save her.

Neville put a reassuring hand on her shoulder. “I’ve bought you some soup. There’s bread
and butter if you can manage it.” He placed the tray on her lap, her arms trying desperately to
reach for the spoon. She couldn’t do it. Tears pricked at the side of her eyes, falling down her
cheeks.

“I c-can’t do it.” She was softly sobbing. Neville lifted the spoon to her mouth. “I’ll do it for
you Hermione, here take a sip.” And she did, the warm soup soothing her sore throat. This
continued for about five minutes before her stomach couldn’t hold anything more.

Luna moved the tray off of Hermione’s lap. There was no bed for her to lay on, to get
comfortable on, just a hard stone like mattress and a thin sheet. She was never comfortable,
the order thought that if she was comfortable the “darkness” inside her would become her.

Luna and Neville both gently raised her arms, putting one of each over their shoulders.
Hermione’s head instantly fell onto Neville’s shoulder. She was tired and worn out but these
little moments bought her peace and she wasn’t ready to give that up, forcing herself to stay
awake.

Slowly both Neville and Luna lifted Hermione, she tried to stand, she winced. Something
wasn’t right. She tried again. The searing pain in her abdomen caused her to double over her
head hitting the floor. Black dots clouded her vision. Her ears rang, she knew she was
concussed. She couldn’t do anything about it.

The last think she remembered was a wand at her stomach and strong arms around her back
and legs.

*********

Luna and Neville were back, sitting on either side of her.

Neville held another spoonful of soup to her lips, she blew softly on it and then sipped.

It was easier to swallow, it had been a few days since there last long visit, they had popped in
every day just to heal her a little but left quickly.

For days she felt as though Moody and Shacklebolt knew, it was as if they were punishing
her for looking better or feeling better.

A head came to rest on her shoulder, with little pain she turned her head and kissed Luna’s
crown then laying her ear atop it. Luna nestled in closer.

Neville vanished the bowl and spoon, stretched out his legs, and put his arms around both
girls. Hermione started to cry, this kind of comfort rarely came to her and when it did, it was
in the form of these beautiful people. The only two people that treated her like a human
being. They were everything to her.

Yet she felt so selfish, they were in danger because of her, that cell door could open anytime
and they would be punished. Punished because they cared for her, because they comforted
her when they are not supposed to. They have become a big part of her, when it was the three
of them alone it was as if nothing could hurt her. The whole world seized to exist but the
three of them. They could accomplish anything if they put their minds to it.

In a was they made her stronger. A unit, these would be the people she would carry with her
through everything. If she were to have children she knew they would be safe with Luna and
Neville.

She kissed Neville’s shoulder. They were her safe haven in the most darkest time of her life.
She had once been told that she was the light in the darkness, but that was not true, the two
amazing people sitting on either side of her were proof of that.

So she just sobbed quietly, letting the warmth from them both settle on her skin, their
kindness and the compassion seep into her aching bones.

She felt a tear drop onto her shoulder and another down her face, all three of them sat there
silently sobbing in each others arms. No one said a word, this was a moment that didn’t need
words. Minutes passed and time was running out for them, they’d have to leave soon.

Luna was the first to break out of their embrace, eyes bloodshot and watery. She wiped away
a stray tear. “We’ll need to be going now.” She kissed Hermione’s cheek.

“We’ll be back soon, I promise Hermione.” Luna stood a hand held out to Neville. He kissed
Hermione’s other cheek and whispered into her ear. “We’ll get out of this fucked up situation,
I promise, we’ll make it out alive.” He stood with the help of Luna. They both helped
Hermione to her makeshift bed. They headed for the door and just as it opened Hermione
spoke to them both.

“I love you.”

And at the same time they both replied. “I love you.” And then they left, leaving Hermione to
openly sob herself to sleep.

**********

Her eyes shot open as she heard the heavy door slam shut.

“Hermione?” She thought she heard her name but it sounded as if the voice was under water.

A face swam between her eyes.

Ron.

Ron took over for Moody and Shacklebolt when they went out on missions. He took his job
at “saving” her seriously. A tear slid down her face. He wasn’t warm. Not like she
remembered. He was clinical. He’d told her before that this was the best way to cancel out
the darkness. “Kindness won’t kill dark magic, you have to fight it with what it is. Evil.”

“Don’t cry, I know what it means when you cry.” Ron said, his voice agitated.

She couldn’t stop her tears even if she wanted to. She just wanted to go. Leave, be free.
Death was always at the forefront of her mind. Not the death of others but herself. She’d
always hoped that a crucio would just end it. The suffering, the pain. Maybe if she had the
strength to stand on the table and jump head first, but then what if that didn’t work and she
was just in more pain, if she had her wand she’d cast the killing curse right at her heart.
Maybe she could elicit some spurs of strength and lash out until Moody or Shacklebolt killed
her.

She knew exactly how she would do it but had no way of following through. But then she
thought of Luna and of Neville and of their kindness and love and how they always managed
to come to her, to be a comfort for her. They knew the risk and the punishment and yet they
still came.

She hadn’t realized her eyes were closed until she opened them and saw that she was sitting
on a chair in front of the very table that blessed her dark thoughts of freedom.
“We’re planning an attack at a safe house, you’ll need to plan it.” When did she start hearing
clearly?

No. She wanted to say no but her hand reached for the quill and her other for the parchment.
Ron handed her a map, detailed with the safe houses interior and exterior, wards and who was
living there.

“We need to know how to get in and out safely with less casualties than necessary. Break
down the wards and find us an entry point.” Ron’s voice was sterile. She didn’t dare look at
his face. Knew the dam would burst if she did.

She sniffled. Big mistake.

“I told you not to cry. I know what you’re doing, trying to make me think there’s still good in
you, I don’t by the way, think there’s good in you. I see the darkness and I know you feel it.”
Ron turned her chair with force, she faced him.

She could admit, her magic felt different. But maybe that was because she hadn’t held her
wand for two years. Maybe just maybe she could delude herself into thinking that.

“You want to know what I believe? I believe that the good girl act was just that, an act. I’ve
seen you Hermione, when we lived in that bloody tent, you studied dark magic for months.”
His hot anger was radiating from him. If this “darkness” didn’t consume her, his anger surely
would.

“You’re sick Hermione, fucking sick, in the battle you threw dark curses without a thought,
whilst the rest of the order was stunning the Death Eaters.” He spat the name as if it was
poison on his tongue. “You were beheading, slitting throats, crushing windpipes with your
foot.”

Hermione knew all of this already, she did what she had to, survival was the most important
thing in the battle of Hogwarts.
Kill or be killed, her magic chose the former.

“Fucking write the plans, I don’t want to look at you. Looking at you reminds me that the
Hermione Granger we knew and loved is fast becoming the Hermione Granger we don’t
recognize.” He turned her chair back to facing the promising table. One of the legs cracked
and she looked down at it, nearly in half.

And she could sympathize, it felt silly to think but she did, she sympathized that this half
broken leg was holding up a weight it could barely balance, half ready to give up yet
something was making it stand, like it needed to hold on a little longer if not for itself but for
the other three legs to stay up, unharmed by the roughness that surrounded them.

She sympathized because she was this chair, worn down, beat and barely hanging on. She
looked up at the parchments. Her back straightened out.
She wiped away a stray tear. It stung her swollen cheek but she didn’t wince, didn’t cry again.
Her quill was dipped into the ink pot and she began writing. Her hand was shaking, why
couldn’t she stop her hand from shaking. She willed it with her mind but it would not stop. It
continued like this for half an hour. Before Ron peered over her shoulder.

“What the fuck do you call this? I can barely read it.” He picked up the parchment and
scrunched it up. “Write it again. Properly, we need to read it.” His acidic tone sparked
something within her and before she knew it she was standing up facing him and in the next
Moment her fist connected with his nose. A sickening crunch echoed around the small cell.

Ron looked back at her, his eyes full of fury, she shrunk back into herself, regret was
plastered all over her face but Ron wouldn’t have been able to see it. His face was pure anger.
Rage fueled Ron was unpredictable.

“Who the fuck do you think you are?” He roared and it wasn’t possible but Hermione shrunk
even more into herself. She felt so small, so defenseless.

Ron rounded on her. His face so close to hers she could see the small spatter of freckles that
adorned his cheeks. “You’ll fucking pay for that. You’ll fucking regret it mudblood.” And this
was it. His wand pointed at her chest he screamed the word she’d come to hate more than
anything in the world. “CRUCIO!”

*********

The next time she woke, she couldn’t move. Why couldn’t she move.

Move.

Just move.

Please.

Move.

Her finger twitched behind her against rope. The feelings in her legs came back. She was on a
chair, tied to a chair. People were moving about around her. The large gulp of air she took in
was clean, fresh. Her vision cleared. She was in the main meeting hall for the order. The large
table had been removed.

Hermione sat in the middle of the room. Surrounded by the entire order. They all looked at
her. Or rather sneered at her.

She was put on show, like a circus animal. She knew it wouldn’t be good, she was never let
out of the box like cold cell. So why now? What did she do? Why couldn’t she remember?

Ron came to stand in front of her, his nose bloody and broken. Suddenly like a bucket of ice
water thrown over her,she remembered. She’d physically hit Ron. She broke his nose. She
did it. Her. She’d done this herself, this was her fault. She was the elephant that the children
throw peanuts at. All because she made a stupid decision in a split second.
“Don’t look all apologetic and regretful.” His voice venomous. But something about his eyes
didn’t match his tone. He turned away from her before she could work it out, addressing the
rest of the room. “Our dear little Hermione here did this to me.” He pointed at his nose. “She
also did this.” Ron lifted his shirt showing bruised and split skin.

When did she do that? She didn’t remember doing that.

“She punched me in the face, and when I was disoriented she stole my wand and attacked
me.” She didn’t. She knew this now. She’d barely the strength to punch Ron, let alone steal
his wand and curse him with it. He was lying. Why was he lying?

She tried to tell them he’s lying, but her mouth was gagged with rope. How had she not
noticed that before.

“We’ve tried to long to bring back the good in her, but what if we were wrong?” He looked at
her. That same look from before. It was sadness mixed with embarrassed anger she
recognized. “What if she isn’t worth saving.” How could he say these things. After
everything she’d done, everything she’d sacrificed to help him and Harry. Everything she’d
lost. No, this wasn’t Ron, it couldn’t be. This wasn’t the Ron she thought she loved.

Ron always had a mean temper and she was always the one left in tears after he’d spat
spiteful words at her. His anger was always the one emotion he clung to. But she’d
embarrassed him and an embarrassed Ron was worse than a Ron that was fuelled by rage.

Seamus began to talk. “I say we kick her out and leave her for dead. She’s a liability, the
longer we keep her here, the closer he who must not be named comes closer to us.” He
looked her dead in the eye. “Every order members death is because of you, remember that.”

A few order members mumbled their agreement. Dean Thomas came up to Seamus, patting
him on the back with encouragement.

And some part of her brain agreed with them, but another part agreed that some of them
deserved it. She was held captive by her dearest friends, they treated her like an enemy. She
squashed that thought quickly.

George Weasley started talking. “We’ve taken her in, treated her like family.” He smiled to
himself. “We thought she was nothing but the light in our dark times, that she was good. But
what she’s done to my brother, it shows that some part of her wants to harm us.” She wanted
the ground to swallow her up. Why were they saying these things about her?

“I change my last statement.” Ron said. “Maybe she is worthy of being saved and there is
good in her, maybe we have to curse out the darkness, show it that the light will always win.”

“Maybe we should.” George said. His wand raised. “How do you want it done?”People
shouted out the spells they thought George should use. Stinging hexes, a spell that would
singe her hair every time a tear escaped her, balding jinx, dancing spell that would make her
dance uncontrollably, tongue tying hex, a few light slices to her face to scare her. Most of
them were to embarrass her but someone shouted that they should use the cruciatus.
Her body seized, just the name made her want to crawl into a dark hole where no one could
find her, somewhere she was safe away from this madness.

“We don’t use unforgivable curses, Fletchley, you know this.” It was Ron who made this
untrue statement. She wondered how they would feel if they knew the truth. Apart of her
believed they already did, there was no silencing spell on her cell. Her screams could be
heard all through the house, Luna had told her once before, Neville said it made him cry, but
Moody told them that it was a dark magic cleanser and her screams were just that. Dark
magic leaving her body.

She looked around for them but there was no sign of Luna or Neville in the room. She
wondered where they could be, it seemed most of the order were here to watch this freak
show. If she could see a kind face maybe she could block it all out.

But there were no kind faces here, just snarling, bared teeth, angry faces.

Anger she’d never felt before bubbled inside her. Not only was Ron lying about her but he
was lying to the rest of them about what she’d been through the past two years. They couldn’t
all be so dense as to think that she was living cushy in a room whilst they steamed out the
darkness they all say is in her.

This new found anger caused a flicker of magic to surround her. They all gasped and stepped
back. The rope around her mouth, wrists and ankles burnt off. She felt strong, stronger that
ever. She raised her hands and it was like they knew exactly what to do. Half the order
members flew into the wall with a crack.

She could see her reflection in the ward her magic built around her. Her skin was clear no
bruises or cuts, Ronald must have disillusioned the proof of what they do to her. Her eyes
were near black, she didn’t recognize herself. But this sudden power surge didn’t last long
and the ward fell down and before she could make a run for it someone shouted “stupefy!”

***********

Moody and Kingsley were shouting at someone. Then that someone shouted back. The door
slammed but not before she heard “Maybe it’s time we end this.”

Ron was at her slab she called a bed.

“Mione?” She didn’t answer.

“I know you can hear me, I’m sorry okay, I’m really fucking sorry, I was angry and
embarrassed and I shouldn’t have done what I did, said the things I did.” He took a shaky
breath.

“I know you’re still Hermione, you’re good, the face of the order, you’re our girl, the light in
the darkness. I love you and you love me, please remember that.” He cradled her head in his
lap. She just stared up at him.
“You know what I’m like when I get angry and embarrassed, I shouldn’t have lashed out. I
just want to save you. I just want you back.” She lifted her hand to his face.

“I forgive you Ronald.” And he smiled. For a split second she believed him, but his eyes, his
eyes have always been the one thing that showed his true emotion. And it wasn’t sincerity in
them.

He was trying to lead her into a false sense of security. She let him, if only for a moment, just
to feel good, if only for a second.

Consciousness was slipping from her and she let her hand fall. Ron lay her back onto the
slab, he kissed her forehead and brushed his cheek against hers, she noted that there were no
tears on his cheek.

His lips moved to her ear. “ I’m only saying this because it’s the last thing you’ll hear.” And
then he left, the door slammed as he closed it, the hinges screaming.

She fell asleep thinking of fourth year, when Ronald was mad at her for going to the Yule ball
with victor, of how vicious he was and then when he wanted something from her, he
suddenly became Ron again.

********

For the first time in two years she woke up without a prominent pain she could locate. Just
the faint chattering of three people in her cell. The voices were Harry, Shacklebolt and
Moody. They were discussing what to do with her.

She sat up and all three heads turned to her. They eyed her suspiciously. She stared at them
blankly.

“We have to do it!” Exclaimed Moody.

“No, you can’t, there still time.” Said Harry.

“Do what exactly?” And Hermione didn’t recognize her own voice.

“It’s taken over Hermione, you’re not you.” Harry eyed her wearily.

“I am me.” She was herself, maybe a little different, but it was her. A stronger version of
herself to be exact.

“You’re not.” Harry turned away from her.

“We need to discuss this elsewhere. Your office Kingsley?” Shacklebolt nodded. They exited
the room. Hermione watched all three leave, never taking her eyes off the door.

A few moments later it opened again. Luna and Neville both burst through the door.
“We have to go now!” Neville shouted.
“They’re coming!” Hermione stood up quickly, seeing Neville so panicked softened her a
little.

“What’s going on?” Again her voice was different, a little rougher around the edges.

“They’ve planned to kill you Hermione.” Luna’s soft voice floated through the air, she wasn’t
panicked or scared.

“We have to go!” Neville started for the door before turning back and approaching Hermione.
“The truth is, He Who Must Not Be Named wants you, not to kill you but to have you, he
wants you on his side. He thinks you show true potential, even admitted that your power on
the battlefield would rival his own.”

Neville looked her in the eye. Full of sincerity. “I think it’s the best option for you, join the
Death Eaters, get payback for what these sick fucks have done to you.” She looked at him,
her eyes filled with unspoken nerves. Neville grabbed her hand reassuringly. “You won’t be
alone, you’ll convince him that the only way you’ll join is if Luna and I can join with you.”
He reached into his pocket and handed her something.

Her wand.

“How’d you get this?” Hermione asked. She wrapped her hand around it and almost fell due
to the dizzying power coursing through her.

“I stole it, it’s rightfully yours. Now come on, we have to go!” Neville turned opening the
door. Luna held her hand out and gestured for Hermione to take hold. She did.

The three of them raced towards the exit. They could hear footsteps ahead of them, there had
to be at least two dozen people. They were out numbered.

Luna cast a disillusionment around the three of them and a silencing spell. All three had their
backs against a wall as they watched the two dozen people walk briskly past them. Once they
were out of sight Luna canceled the spell and they made a run for the door.

“SHE’S THERE!” Someone shouted. It was Cormac Mclaggen.

Heavy running footfalls gained on them, Hermione was taking in her surroundings and
realized that her cell was very close to an exit.

Spells flew their way, they dodged them. Luna and Neville shot spells back at them.

“STOP THEM!” Screamed someone from behind.

They kept running, up the stairs, they were in the main room, the door to freedom right there,
a ward went up, you could see and feel it.

Every order member gathered around them, they were out numbered three to over 300.
Neville cast his own ward around the three of them, spells bounced off of it.
“We’re not going to make it.” Neville pulled at his hair, his eyes panicked.

“We will, I have a plan.” Luna spoke. “If we stand back to back we can cover three different
points. We are strong, Hermione stronger than them all.” Luna looked at her with
encouragement.

“Luna, I haven’t used a wand in two years, I don’t know If I can do it.” She looked down at
her wand.

“You can do it Hermione. Now get into position.” They all turned, back to back, Luna and
Neville started firing spells.

Hermione looked down at her wand. Remembering the power surge she felt when they had
her tied to a chair. She lifted the wand and suddenly a third of the order members flew back.
Some breaking bones, some broke their necks.

This is it, survive, if she survives she’ll be free.

Neville’s ward was slowly breaking down. Hermione cast another one, this one ten times
stronger, they moved as a trio through the order members. Fighting them off as best as they
could.

Five minutes.

Ten minutes.

Fifteen minutes.

They were tiring out quickly.

The ward broke and a slicing hex hit Hermione in the stomach. She looked up.
Ron was staring at her, his eyes bloodshot, she looked past him and there on the floor lay
Arthur weasley, gripping his stomach.

She couldn’t help but smirk. She’d kill them all If she had the chance.

She cast another ward but she was drained. She looked behind her and saw that Luna and
Neville were both putting up a fight but their wands gripped lazily.

“We’ve got to run for the door.” They all agreed, the protective ward was strong enough for
them to make it to the door, Hermione would have to break the ward on the room for them to
leave.

All three ran for the door, not bothering to strike back at the spells hitting off the ward.
Hermione made quick work, casting difficult spells. The ward was giving way even when the
order tried to put it back up. She was relentless. She never let them successfully rebuild it.

A few more spells and it would completely crumble, her own still held.
There, she had it , throwing up a new ward around the place that only let them leave, she
opened the door. The ward around them dissipated, a strong jet of green light barrelled
towards them and before she knew it Neville lunged in front of her, he smiled at her, the spell
hitting him square in the back.

“NO!” The room shook.

Cormac lowered his wand, a slight smirk on his proud face.

Everything slowed as if the world had stopped every clock to this precise moment.
She heard herself scream, she looked towards Luna and realised it was her screaming. Luna
sank to the floor mouth wide open, eyes blown wide shaking Neville, as it the force would
will the killing curse to pass out of him and he’d be alive again. She cradled his head and
kissed his cheek, tear after tear dripping onto his lifeless face. She used her fingers to close
his eyes giving each lid a kiss.

And yet the order didn’t stop, spells flew their way and Hermione took every chance she had
to protect Luna, tears clouding her vision but she wouldn’t relent, they killed one of the only
people who protected her, they killed her best friend.

Luna’s screaming had stopped, she slowly rose to her feet her face was unlike anything
Hermione had seen before, cold, lifeless, face a harsh shade of white. Magic radiated from
her. It cracked around her hair, enveloping her whole body.

She looked down at her hands, raising them in front of her. Her scream was so loud that
Hermione thought her eardrums had burst.

Blood splattered, body’s broke, order members flew into walls and bounced off of floors,
Luna just continued to scream and scream. With every order member either dead or
unconscious Hermione wrapped her arms around her, hugging her tightly from behind.

“We have to go.” She whispered softly into her ear. “Luna, we have to go.” Luna turned in
her arms, she looked down at her hands, and then at Neville.

“We can’t leave him, Hermione we can’t leave him here.” The thought of leaving him never
even crossed her mind. Luna looked up at her, every soft feature of her face corrupted with
grief. Hermione stroked her cheek and nodded.

They both grabbed one of Neville’s arms and placed them over their shoulder’s, Neville’s
head swayed and landed on Hermione’s shoulder, she ran her nose through his hair. Luna
placed a hand over his still heart. Hermione took one look back at the place she had so much
hate for. The three of them left the place that held the worst memories for them.

They got to the clearing in the trees hearts heavy, Neville’s limp body tucked tightly to them
and apparated away.
 Chapter 7
Chapter Summary

Memories continued.
2000

Chapter Notes

There’s a lot of dialogue in this chapter. Hope you enjoy <3

Cold, crisp air hit her face. It had been two years since she had been outside, her eyes took
time to adjust. It was early evening if she was to hazard a guess. The sun hadn’t quite set yet.

All three of them fell as Luna collapsed. Reality washed over her like a sudden rain storm on
an otherwise clear day.

Neville was gone.

He’d died saving her. He looked her in the eyes, smiled at her and in a split second he was
killed. Overwhelming Guilt threatened to take over. She wouldn’t let it. No, Luna needed her,
she had to be there for her.

While she was in her own head Luna had pulled Neville into her lap, she cradled his face
with one hand and stroked his hair with the other. Her tears fell like snowflakes onto his
ashen face. Hermione couldn’t stop her tears from falling down her own cheeks.

Luna looked up at her, eyes bloodshot and glossy. “Hermione, I-“ Her strangled sob cut her
off and Hermione moved to her side, she hugged Luna, like a mother comforting a small
child. She kissed her temple.

“I know, I’m so sorry.” Because what else could she say, nothing would make this moment
hurt any less. So she just held her, she stoked her hair, kisses her temple as they rocked in
place. Nothing could stop the burning ache in their hearts. He was gone. He won’t come
back. And it was all her fault.

No.

It was the orders fault.

Luna looked up at Hermione, a serious expression on her tear stained face.
“I’ll kill him for this. Cormac is fucking dead.”

Yes. Yes he is.

***********

They sat like that for a while. Just the three of them. Eyes closed, nothing but the wind
howling in their ears.

Hermione opened her eyes and looked around. “Where are we?” She asked Luna.

Luna lifted her head, looking around at the open field, it was filled with beautiful flowers and
large trees, there was a large patch they sat close to that looked like it had been planted by
hand, it went on for miles, it was really quite beautiful.

There was a small smile on her chapped lips. She sniffled. “Neville used to bring me here all
the time. When we couldn’t stand to hear you scream anymore. We’d be lying in bed
together, both trying to drown out the noise, we never put a silencing spell up.” She looked at
Hermione then.

“We had listen, not because we wanted to but because we needed to know you were still
alive.” A tear slipped down her cheek and into her cupids bow. She licked it away. Hermione
understood, hated that they had to endure it but she understood.

She looked back at Neville. “There were some days where it was just complete mental torture
for the both of us, we know you had it worse but we couldn’t keep listening, we would have
been locked away, we used to pretend that we could just break in, stop them, take you away
and bring you here, but we were waiting.” Hermione looked at her confused.

“Waiting for what?” She asked. Luna looked up at her. “The dark lord sent us a message in
the form of Narcissa Malfoy.” If Hermione could see her own face she knows it would look
utterly bewildered.

Luna continued. “She found us here in this field six months before we saved you, we were
about to run but she placed her wand on the ground, held her hands in the air and said
“Please do not run, I am not here to harm you, I have a message for you from the dark lord
himself. The Granger girl, when she exhibits true power then the time is right to get her out.”
Hermione’s mind was reeling.

“Neville defended you, he told her that she was absolutely mad if she thought he would just
hand over a muggle born to a man who hates them with every fibre of his being.” She smiled
at Neville and looked back at Hermione.

“He got pretty heated, started screaming about how much hell the order have put you
through, that he would not do it to you again, screaming that the order were trying to break
you because they thought you were evil and consumed with darkness. Narcissa nodded her
head at us and Apparated away.” That sounded like Neville, always ready to protect his
friends. Guilt threatened her throat.

Luna looked down at Neville again and gently wiped his wind swept hair off of his face. “She
came one last time, we thought she may have put a tracking spell on us or something. This
time she said “Miss Lovegood, Mr Longbottom, I am here to assure you that my lord does not
want to harm Miss Granger, we wants to have her, for her to join forces with our side, he
thinks her powers are exceptional. I have explained to him what you told me, that the order
do not see her potential and are trying to diminish her powers, he wants to help her.” Luna
took a deep shuddering breath.

“We didn’t understand what she meant by help you so Neville questioned her relentlessly,
and she answered every question willingly that’s when she told us that he saw you on the
battlefield and that kind of quick thinking and spell casting was unique, the kind of power
that could rival his own.” It was Hermione’s turn to take a deep breath, she hadn’t realised
she had been holding it in all this time.

“How did you know you could trust her?” Was the only thing she could manage to ask at the
moment.

“We didn’t but it was the best plan we had, she seemed sincere, Neville and I went over it a
thousand times and it was the only option to keep you safe, get you out, get you to the dark
lord.” Luna stopped talking then, eyes focused on Neville as if reliving old memories.

Hermione wasn’t sure how to feel about it all, Neville had told her mere hours ago that the
dark lord wanted her, to be on his side but she never really had time to process it.

Did she want to be a Death Eater?

She wanted revenge, revenge for herself, for Luna and for Neville. But becoming a Death
Eater was a whole new can of worms to open. Did she believe in what they stood for? Could
she consciously switch sides and fight with Voldemort?

She wasn’t quite ready to think about it.

She looked at Luna, there was a question she’d always wanted to ask. No time like the
present.

“Luna?” Luna broke out of her daydream. “Hmm?” Was all she replied.

“We’re you and Neville together?” And the laugh that erupted from Luna was pure and
vibrant. Hermione’s cheeks reddened but she smiled at the beautiful witch. She calmed down
some and began speaking, her voice light and airy.

“No Hermione, Neville was not my boyfriend, why’d you ask?” Luna had some colour back
in her cheeks, her smile brightening.
“You were mostly together when you visited me and then you said you’d both be lying in bed
together so I just assumed.” She trailed off, a little embarrassed that she just assumed.

“Neville and I are best friends, have been since my fifth year, we were each others firsts, and
after it happened we both just laughed at each other, we weren’t attracted to each other at all.”
And that far away look took over Luna.

“You would have made a lovely couple if you were.” Hermione said in way trying to tame
the embarrassment she felt creeping up her spine.

“Neville is gay Hermione.” She deadpanned and laughed again, it was such a sweet sound.
“After we’d had sex, we laughed at each other, it was good sex but I knew I wasn’t what he
wanted and he wasn’t what I wanted.” She shook her head.

“He stopped laughing and just blurted out I’m gay. I stopped laughing then and he made to
move off the bed but i tugged him back and hugged him so tightly I thought I would crush
him.”

Hermione looked down at Neville and smiled. But the tears flooded her eyes again and he
was just a blur in Luna’s lap.

“We got to talking and joking about boys he could date and he said he would find me
someone suitable.” She rolled her eye, smiling. “I told him that I secretly liked Slytherins and
he told me he had a crush on Blaise Zabini. Apparently they were paired in Herbology
together and from that day on he was in love.” Luna chuckled.

“Blaise Zabini is bisexual you know, I heard it from two Slytherin girls when I was a
prefect.” Said Hermione, it was true, when she was patrolling in sixth year she was so tired
that she sat down in an alcove, she was about to tell the two girls off but just couldn’t get her
legs too move so she just listened to them gossip.

Luna stoked Neville’s cheek. “He would be so happy to hear that.” Her voice cracked.

Hermione hugged Luna who pulled Neville closer. “He’d be ecstatic, he’d throw a party in
this field, if you look just over there, you’ll see a purple and orange flower, Neville made
them himself, he even called them Zabini, he said one day he’d give him one.” Luna stopped
talking. Hermione looked over at the flower.

A smooth green stem with orange and purple petals surrounding a yellow middle with specks
of blue in it, it was gorgeous. The kinds of flowers you’d look at and never pick, leaving it to
just grow.

They sat in silence for while longer, until Luna shifted. “I want to burry him here, this was
his garden, he created most of it himself.” Luna shifted again but not away from Hermione,
closer.

For the first time since they’d gotten here she let go of Neville and wrapped her arms around
Hermione’s waist. Hermione wrapped hers around Luna’s shoulders and placed her cheek on
the crown of Luna’s head.
“I’m so sorry Luna.” She cried. If they hadn’t helped her he would still be alive, yes she’d
still be in that cell but he would be alive, and he and Luna could be in this garden together.

“It’s not your fault Hermione. I don’t blame you.” Hermione’s body relaxed, she hadn’t
realised she’d been tense. Relief and grief flooded her and the two girls wept whilst holding
each other.

In this moment right now Hermione knew she would never let anything bad happen to Luna,
she’d protect her until her last breath.

“We can bury him here Luna, I think it’s the perfect place for him. He’d love it.” He really
would, Neville loved Herbology, he was obsessed with plants and gardens, this would be the
perfect resting place for him.

Luna untangled herself from Hermione, kissed Neville’s forehead and gently placed his head
on the soft grass, she spent a long while just looking at him, she got to her knees and pulled
herself up, holding out her hand to Hermione.

Hermione gratefully took it. Taking one last look at Neville before they both conjured shovels
and began to dig in the flower bed.

************

Hermione Transfigured a twig into a beautiful coffin and they both levitated Neville into it.

Once he was in it they levitated the coffin into the grave, shovelled the dirt over it and Luna
transfigured a Zabini flower into a headstone that read.

“Neville Longbottom.
30th July 1980 - 19th September 2000
Loyal friend, Amazing son and kind soul.
A blessing to
encounter .”

They both kissed their fingers and touched his headstone. They placed wards around it so
only they could see it and enter the flower bed. They stood one arm around the others waist
just looking. Luna’s head on Hermione’s shoulder.

“He was amazing you know, he did everything he could think of to get you out of there.”
Luna whispered.

“Thank you Neville.” Croaked Hermione, her throat raw.

A crack filled the air.

Narcissa Malfoy swam into vision. She placed her wand on the ground and looked around not
seeing anything or anyone. Hermione studied her, all black clothing except for a gold locket
around her neck, no mask. She was all elegance and beautiful cheekbones, eyes bright blue.
Those same bright eyes scanned the area again.

Luna looked at Hermione and nodded. They both stepped out of the flower bed and into view.
Hermione had her wand behind her back, ready for anything.

Narcissa gently smiled at them both. But then it dropped. “Miss Lovegood, Miss Granger,
where is Mr Longbottom?” She asked.

“He didn’t make it.” Was all Luna managed to say, looking off to the side. Narcissa’s
expression shifted then, an apology ready on her lips.

“How did you know we were here?” Hermione questioned. Narcissa looked off to the side.
“Lele!” She called.

A little house elf rubbing her giant brown eyes appeared. “Lele is sorry mistress, Lele must
have been tired and fell asleep. But I call as soon as I see the ladies.” Lele walked up closer
to Narcissa and grabbed onto her hand.

The tiny house elf looked up at Hermione, she blinked once, her eyes went wide and she
looked away.

“Thank you Lele, you may go back home now, the children are waiting.” Lele took one last
look at Hermione and popped out of existence.

Narcissa could see the puzzled look on both girls faces. “My house elf came across this field
once when foraging, she saw Mr Longbottom and Miss Lovegood and reported back to me.
That’s how I know when you are here.” Narcissa’s smile returned on her thin lips.

“How do I know I can trust you?” Hermione took a step in front of Luna, wand still at her
back.

“You’ve come this far, i haven’t a wand in my hand or any intention of hurting you. I’ve
revealed a secret of mine, of how I always find you.” She glanced down at her wand then
back at the girls.

“How do I know he won’t kill me the minute I step foot near him?” It was clear who she was
referring to. No need to clarify.

“I give you my word.” Was all Narcissa said.

“That’s not enough.” It really wasn’t, she didn’t even know this woman.

“I understand your apprehension Miss Granger, all I have to offer you is my word.” Her blue
eyes stared straight into Hermione. She did seem sincere.

“It’s still not enough, your word means nothing to me.” Narcissa wasn’t offended by this, her
smile never faltered.
“And why would it, you do not know me, you have no reason to trust me as I have no reason
to trust you. You are the one with the wand, you could strike me down any second now. If I
was here to harm you Miss Granger, I would have done so already.” It wasn’t a threat, just
stating a fact.

Before Hermione could speak there was another crack in the air and from the smoke stepped
the dark lord himself. Hermione raised her wand.

“I am not here to harm you Miss Granger, I know all you have been subjected to. I knew
before Narcissa told me. I am here to help.” Voldemort stood next to Narcissa, bent low and
placed his wand on the floor next to hers.

“How did you know?” She whispered. She didn’t want to relive that, she was out, she was
alive.

“Your rebellion are not so quiet. Two of my Death Eaters heard the Weasley boy and his
sister talking about how you were different. Of how they were planned to rid the darkness out
of you.” God she was going to be sick.

“He talked about what they had already tried and that it didn’t work.” Bile rose in her throat.
Her mind flicked back to the past two years, everything she had endured, how she survived
she’ll never know.

“How did you know to contact Luna and Neville?” She demanded.

“When cissa informed me that they were always here, I took, as one may say, a wild guess
that they were not involved in the suffering that was inflicted upon you. It seems I was
correct.” He flicked imaginary dust off of his cloak.

“What would you have done if you had been wrong?” She inquired, purely out of curiosity.

“You would be dead and I would not be here trying to assist you.” Hermione internally
recoiled. How many times did she wish for death? How many times did she calculate the
quickest way to kill herself, to end the constant torture?

“I’m here to offer you a deal.” He said, pulling her out of her memories. Hermione’s wand
lowered but she took another step in front of Luna. “A deal?” She questioned, back straight,
eyes focused on him.

“Yes, a deal.” She wasn’t scared of him, she looked him dead in the eye and he did the same.

“What kind of deal?” She had his full attention, his lips curved up in a smile, it send a shiver
down her spine.

“Join me, become one of my followers and I myself will teach you how to control your magic
and help you exact your revenge on the order.” She guessed the time had come to think about
it.

“Why would I join you? I’m a muggle-born, a mudblood, you hate my kind.” She stood
taller, eyes narrowing.
“That may be true, your kind mean nothing to me and if I had it my way I’d rid the world of
you all.” The hairs on her body stood on end and her rage bubbled inside of her.

“Yet you yourself, you fascinate me Miss Granger, I never seen a mudblood so powerful
before. Someone like you who does not hesitate to use deadly force against the opposition.”
She felt a weird sense of pride at his words. He continued.

“We both have the same goal in mind, it would be a pity to waste your talents.” She
considered for a moment. A compromise burning her tongue.

“We both have the same goal in mind, yes.” He nodded at her. They did, she wanted the order
to pay and so did he. She could get her revenge and not feel guilty about it.

“Luna comes with me.” He didn’t hesitate when he replied.

“Done.”

Hermione nodded. Considering further.

“If I join you, what else can you do for me?” He assessed her. Eyes raking up and down body.

“I can make you the strongest witch on earth, you and I will be equals, the world will fear the
name her Hermione Granger. All you have to do is let me train you, you’ll not only be the
brightest witch of your age but the most powerful.” Now that sounded like a good plan. She
considered even more. He wasn’t getting impatient, he waited. Like she was the answer all
his questions and he had all the time in the world to ask them.

Luna came to stand in front of her. Hermione panicked, turning them around so her back was
facing Narcissa and Voldemort. She realized how vulnerable she was at this moment but
Luna was all she could think of.

“Say yes Hermione, it’s a good deal.” Luna nodded with encouragement. Smiling up at her.

“Are you sure Luna? What if it’s all a trick and the moment we lower our guard he kills us?”
Luna shook her head.

“He would have killed you by now, we have to trust what he’s saying, we have to, Neville
would want us too. If we don’t then he died for nothing.” And that was all she needed.

Hermione slowly turned around. Facing the two of them again, if they wanted to kill her that
moment would have been perfect, she would do this, for Neville.

“I accept your offer.” The dark lord lowered to pick up his wand. “Under one condition.” She
added, he halted then slowly straightened once more.

“You mean another condition? Name your price.” He said. Eyes glinting. Was her joking with
her? She couldn’t process that right now.

“The Weasley’s, Moody, Shacklebolt.” She said jutting her chin out. “They’re mine.” And he
laughed, it was an unsettling laugh.
“As you wish Miss Granger. May I add a condition of my own?” He asked, and it was so
polite that she visibly shivered. She nodded at him.

“Call me My lord from here on out.” She was about to protest but Luna poked a finger into
her back.

“Compromise Hermione.” Luna whispered behind her. Hermione looked up at the sky, took a
breath, then looked back at Voldemort.

“As you wish, My lord.”

“You continue to intrigue me Miss Granger.” He smiled, it was predatory, teeth on show.

He picked up his wand and gestured for them to come to him.

Slowly but surely they made their way over, he held out his arm for her to take, she took
Luna’s hand first and then linked her elbow with his. He looked down at her, his eyes full of
wonder. Narcissa picked up her wand and took Luna’s other hand.

She took one last look behind her at Neville’s grave and willed the tears to stay put.

Turning back she looked at her new lord. “Welcome to the right side, young Death Eater.”
Voldemort apparated them all away.
 Chapter 8
Chapter Summary

memories
2000
TW: this chapter mentions suicidal thoughts

Chapter Notes

Hi :) It has been a while

but i am happy to say...
I have a few chapters written out and ready to post so hopefully i can start posting
regularly!

The apparition turned her stomach, she felt as if she were going to vomit. She unhooked her
arms, one wrapping around her stomach, a hand on her knee. She dry heaved multiple times,
nothing came out. She hadn't had any real solid food in years. Nothing but a long string of
dribble dripped from her mouth.

Falling to her knees, she closes her eyes, both arms now wrapped protectively around herself.
She was exhausted, worn down and debilitated. Everything came rushing forward, every
emotion she never allowed to pass through her, hitting her like a tsunami. Neville’s death,
how fucked up the past two years had been, almost everyone she once loved or cared for
turning their back on her, knowing she was rotting away. How worthless she felt, how the
only comfort she had was the thought of taking her own life.

She erupted, her body shaking. She screamed so loud the ground beneath her shook. She
screamed until her throat was raw and all that she could hear was the ringing in her ears. She
screamed. Because how could they do that to her? How much more could she have endured?
Why was the fate of the order put on her shoulders whilst she was the one locked away,
brutally tortured by people she once knew. The same people who would beat her relentlessly,
yet claim they only wanted what was best for her. She wasn’t evil, yet they treated her as if
she was the devil himself.

Why did Neville, one of the only people who risked everything to give her some semblance
of peace have to die to protect her? Why did they have to go through so much at such a
young age? Why wasn’t she the one that died tonight? It was supposed to be her yet here she
is, filthy, dirty in the mud wondering the how's and why’s when such a kind soul died tonight.
Because of her. For her.
A strong arm wrapped around her back, lifting her. Another arm under her legs, she curled
into their chest, wrapping her arms around their neck. They began walking, the cold chill of
the wind settling into her bones.

It wasn’t a long walk, she was set down on her feet, but her knees gave out falling back to the
ground. Two hands cupped the sides of her face, someone was speaking to her, she tried her
hardest to lock onto the voice, but her mind felt scrambled, she couldn’t quite grasp it. Their
thumbs stroked her cheeks as they continued to talk. The buzzing in her head quieted enough
for her to hear the wind and then the voice.

“Miss Granger, look at me.” The voice was soft, almost calming. She willed herself to hone
in on the voice, to let that be the only thing she could hear. They asked her to look at them
again. Opening her eyes to a sight she’d never thought she’d see.

The dark lord, the most feared wizard in wizarding history was knee deep in the dirt, cupping
her face with genuine concern in his eyes.

“Miss Granger, can you hear me?” His tone was firm but gentle, as if he were talking to a
small child who had cut their knee. She was too stunned to say anything, only managing
blinking for the moment at his compassion.

“Hermione, I need you to stand,” His hands moved from her face, hooking his arms under
both of hers. “Can you do that for me?” He lifted them both, holding her steady as she stood
on both feet. She stared at him, how could a man who instilled so much fear and hate be so
empathetic towards her, a Mudblood of all things.

“Can you walk Miss Granger?” He asked, taking a step away from her but keeping his hands
on her upper arms. Her response of “yes” was croaked out but as she took a step out of his
hold her head began to pound and she almost slipped. The dark lord caught her, wrapping an
arm around her waist, tucking her tightly to his side. They waited a beat before walking
again. Hermione placed her arm around his waist to keep her upright as they walked at a
speed that benefitted her.

She took in her surroundings, for a while it was just trees illuminated by the moon, until they
reached a known pathway, she looked up at the foreboding home. Her heart beat in her chest
furiously, mouth drying instantly. “Malfoy Manor.” It wasn’t a question, the last time she was
here was with harry and Ron. When Bellatrix had carved the ugly word into her forearm. It
wasn’t the worst thing she had endured but it still haunted her.

“I'm not wanted here,” She looked over to Narcissa who gave her a small sympathetic smile.
“I'm not safe here am I?” She questioned, craning her neck so she could look at the dark lord.

“As long as you are under my protection, I will keep you safe.” Something in his tone made
her genuinely believe him. “Miss Granger, it will take a while for the other death eaters to get
used to your presence, Cissa and I have arranged for you and miss Lovegood to stay in her
wing of the manor. We will slowly integrate you into meetings, we will not rush you, you can
take your time.” She wanted to cry again.
Her head began to buzz again, a million thoughts swimming around. It was hard to focus on
just one. They continued their walk up the dimly lit pathway until they reached a set of large
black gates.

Hermione heard Narcissa mumble an incantation, allowing the gates to slowly separate.

A shrill shriek sliced through the air. Hermione didn’t have to look up to know who it
belonged to.

“Why is that filth here my lord?” Bellatrix screamed, her foul breath skimming across
Hermione's face, sending a shiver down her spine at the memory of Bellatrix, hunched over
her body, clutching her jaw, spitting nothing but pure venom in her face.

The dark lord took a step, almost protectively in front of Hermione. One of his arms behind
him holding her up right whilst Luna came beside her, steadying her with a firm hand on her
back.

“You would do well not to question me, Bella.” He said, rising to his full height, looming
over her until she fell to her knees and cowered beneath him.

Hermione looked out from behind him, watching as Bellatrix caught her eye and sneered.
They stared at each other for what felt like years, but in reality, it was only a few seconds.
Voldemort stepped to the side, concealing Hermione once more, effectively cutting off their
staring contest.

Narcissa was oddly silent throughout the whole ordeal, that made Hermione turn her head
turn to the side, holding in a gasp at the look on her face. Utter disgust radiated from the
Malfoy matriarch, as if the sight of her sister was like smelling horse shite.

“Get off the floor, go inside.” The dark lord bent low, one finger lifting Bellatrix’s chin,
forcing her to look into his eyes. “Go to your room, I do not want to hear from you for the
rest of the night.” She was about to protest but something made her stop. “Do I make myself
clear?” She nodded, but when Hermione caught a quick flash of her face, it was scrunched up
in anger, looking truly like a child that has just been chastised.

Voldemort turned to her then, coming back to her side, Luna moved out the way so he could
loop his arm around her waist, she mimicked his actions, slinging her arm around his waist as
they continued their walk towards the front doors of the Manor.

Hermione saw Greyback look at her, his sharp bottom teeth on show as he licked his top lip
in a predatory way. He held the door open for them, one of his hands reached out to touch
her. Before he got the chance, his hand was hit with a curse that made it erupt in flames. He
yelped, blowing on it, trying to put it out.

“You will not touch her, mutt.” Said Voldemort, his wand still trained on Greyback, waiting
for him to disobey. He yelped again when the fire spread up his arm.

“Yes, my lord.” He gritted out through clenched teeth. The spell subsided, Greyback nursed
his wounded arm, shooting daggers at Hermione as she passed.
She didn’t look at him again, instead she lifted her eyes to the hundreds of death eaters in
front of her. Some looked at her with disgust, others with surprise. She stood a little taller
then, lifting her chin in the air as she put up a front. Trying to act braver than she felt with
hundreds of eyes staring at her.

The dark lord pulled her a little closer to him, walking them into the middle of the large space
at the front of the house. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Narcissa and Luna walking up
a grand staircase and disappearing around the corner. She faltered a little, wishing she had
Luna by her side.

Voldemort turned them in a circle before stopping. Hermione didn’t know why, but her arm
around his waist tightened and her hand fisted his robes.

“You will all be silent.” The room went quiet. No sound could be heard except a clock ticking
in the distance.

“Miss Granger is now one of us.” She heard a few gasps, her eyes focused on a chip in the
wall. The slight bravery she felt a few moments ago no longer present. “She has yet to take
the mark, but she will.” Something inside her wanted to say she would not take the mark, but
she remembered Luna telling her to compromise, so she bit her tongue, hard enough to taste
blood.

“She will stay here, with me at Malfoy Manor. Anyone who insults, harms or even deigns to
touch one hair on her head will suffer fatal consequences.” His head turned, eyes surveying
them all. “She is not a plaything for you to toy with. If I find out any of you have disobeyed
me, I will personally make you suffer at my hands. This is her home now, you will treat her
with respect, treat her as one of you. She will no longer be known as Potter’s mudblood. If
you wish to address her, you will call her by her name. She is under my care, harming her is
the equivalent to raising your wand to me. Any disrespect towards Miss Granger is a personal
attack on me, do I make myself clear?”

A muttered chorus of “Yes, my lord” was heard, giving Hermione the strength to finally look
at them all. A few seemed disgruntled, others looked absolutely fearful. Hermione then
looked at the dark lord, he was already looking at her, his serpentine eyes sharp, she did not
have the mental or emotional capacity to think about what he said. Instead, she just nodded
her head in thanks, he seemed to be satisfied with that.

He began to lead them through the throng of death eaters, they all moved with synchronised
movements, spreading out into two lines, letting them pass through the middle. Once they
reached the staircase, his grip on her tightened. Her legs still felt weak and a part of her was
thankful that he was helping her up the stairs, the other part was horrified that the death eaters
had to see her struggle. Her pride had taken a hell of a beating, but she just wanted a bath and
then to curl up into bed and imagine none of this had happened.

When they reached the top of the stairs, he manoeuvred her down a long corridor. Stopping in
front of a bedroom door, pointing at it. “This is Miss Lovegood’s room. If you need her, she
is right there.” Then he turned her to the side, opening another door, ushering her inside.
The room was large, larger than she had seen in two years. A queen sized four posted bed, a
large wall covered in books on a bookshelf. Off to the side was two large sofas surrounding a
coffee table. Behind her was a walk-in wardrobe, just to the side of that was an open door
that showed the bathroom. She hadn't realised she’d been walking on her own until her feet
came to a stop, lightly scuffing against the chest at the bottom of her bed.

“Miss Granger?” Hermione whipped around, facing Voldemort. His eyes laser focused on her
as he watched her study the room. Tears threatened to spill from her eyes, she wasn’t
confined to a small room anymore. She was grateful for that, slowly, she took a few steps
towards him until she came to stop a few inches before him. He reached out slowly pulling
her into an awkward hug.

“You are going to be safe here, my child.” He said into the air above her head. “Do you still
have your wand?” He questioned. Hermione wrenched herself out of his grip, and stared at
him, fear lacing her whole body.

“You can’t have it.” She tried to shout but her throat was still raw.

“It is not my intention to take your wand, Miss Granger. I was only asking because if you
didn’t, I have a spare.” He reached into his robes, pulling out a large white wand that looked
like it had been made from bone.

“I have my wand, my...” She paused for a brief second before uttering the words that felt
foreign on her tongue. “I have my wand, my lord.” He nodded in satisfaction and turned to
leave. Panic started to rear its ugly head as he opened the door.

“Wait!” It was more of a whisper than a shout. Turning, he faced her, a look of confusion in
his serpentine eyes. “My room... well, is it warded?”

“I will personally ward your room for you tonight, Miss Granger, but tomorrow you will do it
yourself.” She nodded, relief flooding her.

“Get some rest, I will see you tomorrow.” With that he left, she could feel the wards surround
her as she made her way to the bathroom. It was much bigger than she expected, a large
clawfoot tub off to the side, a shelf on the wall beside it, filled with soaps, shampoos and
conditioners, a shower at the far end of the room, a large vanity and mirror facing the tub.
Two large shelves filled with normal and hand towels.

She flicked her wand a few times at the tub trying and failing to fill it, anger bubbled deep
inside her, with one more sharp flick of her wand, the bath filled with boiling water, so hot
the room filled with steam in seconds.

She undressed, not caring about the temperature of the water and sank into the tub, letting the
scolding water burn her skin until she felt numb. After a while of just lying there she washed
from head to toe, stepping out to grab a towel and wrapping herself in it, she looked at the
filthy water and then to the sink to clean her teeth. After she rinsed her mouth out, she caught
sight of herself in the mirror.
A gasp slipped from her split lip, her face bruised and swollen, deep purple, blues, greens and
yellows marred her skin. She looked nothing like herself, the girl she saw now was broken.
Completely stripped of who she used to be. She looked down, the part of her chest not
covered by the towel was also scarred and bruised. She quickly looked away, leaving the
bathroom to enter the wardrobe. It was stocked with clothes, definitely nothing Narcissa
Malfoy would wear.

She rifled through some draws until she found a long-sleeved sleep shirt, some pyjama
bottoms and socks. Getting dressed seemed to hurt a lot more than she had anticipated.
Without adrenalin coursing through her, she could now feel just how weak and battered she
really was. Refusing to let the tears spill, she got dressed as quickly as she could and made
her way to the bed.

Once she’d climbed inside, tucked herself deep into the covers, that is when she let her tears
fall.

That night she had cried herself to sleep to the thought of Neville, the look in his eyes and the
kind smile on his lips as he sacrificed himself for her freedom.
 Chapter 9
Chapter Summary

memories
2000
TW: panic attack, suicide attempt

Chapter Notes
See the end of the chapter for notes

Hermione woke to the sound of tapping. Loud obnoxious tapping, for a moment she thought
she could feel the harsh, cold slab of the makeshift bed she had frequented the past two years.
She nestled herself closer into the soft pillow, content to ignore the tapping, hopefully fall
back to sleep until the nightmare that was her life faded into nothingness.

The tapping persisted and with a frustrated growl and painful movements, she shot up out of
bed to find the source.

There at the bottom of her bed in a thick, black wing backed chair, sat Theodore Nott, tapping
his wand against the arm of the chair, looking at her. Hermione reached for her wand that she
had stashed under her pillow last night and aimed it at him. Confusion and panic contorted
her features whilst he smirked at her, mischief written all over his face.

“Good morning to you too Granger, now if you could kindly lower your wand from my fa...”
She cut him off, painfully lifting herself so she was on her knees, pointedly keeping her wand
aimed at him.

“How did you get in here?” She asked, her throat still scratchy with not being used for hours.

Theo raised himself from the chair, hands raised in the air in surrender and walked over to the
coffee table, picking up a glass of water, walking back towards her and offering it to her.

She followed his every move, her wand arm shaking a little as he approached her. She
desperately wanted the water he was offering but didn’t trust that he hadn't poisoned it. He
huffed a short laugh, the breath disturbing some of the hair that was falling into his eyes.

“Take the water Granger, Merlin knows you need it.” His outstretched arm shook the glass a
little. She shook her head. He rolled his eyes.

“You really think I would poison you?” Hermione's eyes widened a little after he reiterated
her earlier thought. “You think I would piss off the dark lord and get myself killed over a
little school rivalry?”
“We never interacted in school.” Was all she said, and she hated the way her voice croaked.
Theo smirked knowingly, shaking the glass again, before rolling his eyes and taking a sip
himself.

“See, no poison.” Even though she knew she shouldn’t, she kept her wand trained on him and
reached out her other hand. He placed the cold glass against her palm, she drank greedily,
spilling a little down herself. Once she had finished, she passed the empty glass back to him.

He turned around, putting his back to her and she gaped at the sight. For all he knew she
could have hexed him right there, a part of her wondered why she didn’t.

Turning back around, he offered her another full glass of water. This time she didn’t hesitate
to take it off of him, even lowering her wand slightly as she – for the second time – greedily
drank the offered beverage, spilling more down her top.

His eyes softened a little, but they still contained some humour.

“You utterly wound me, Granger.” He said, resuming his position on the comfy looking chair
that – now she thinks about it – didn’t see last night.

“I conjured it.” He chuckled. For the second time that morning, she gaped at him.

“C- can you read my mind?” He threw his head back, gripping the arms of the chair to steady
himself as he barked up a hearty laugh. Hermione felt an embarrassed flush creep across her
bruised features. When Theo had stopped laughing – wiping a few stray tears from his under
eyes – he looked at her. His eyes once again softening as he spoke.

“No Granger, I cannot read your mind, you just wear your emotions and feelings all over
your face.” He used his finger to gesture the outline of her face. And for some unknown
reason, Hermione completely lowered her wand and relaxed a little against her pillows. Still
not completely comfortable in his presence but – and if she was completely honest – sitting
up on her knees was too much to endure.

Maybe it was because he hadn't once flashed his wand at her, or maybe it was because of the
boyish grin he wore, but she found herself giving him a small smile in return.

“Anyways, we have interacted Gran-” She cut him off again.

“No, we have-” He cut her off.

“Ye-”

“No, I would have rem-”

“I’m telling the truth Gr-”

“I don’t belie-”

“Never said you had t-”

“So, when did this supposed interact-”

“Fourth year, potions." He said calmly, Hermione tried to wrack her brain for any slight
remembrance of it. And then, like a bomb going off. “Yes! I remember now!”

“See, I told you.” He smiled at her; she gave him a shy smile back. Something about Theo’s
presence was comforting, she couldn’t quite put her finger on why.

The silence settled around them for a moment before Hermione shifted uncomfortably in her
bed.

“How did you get into my room?” She asked, her tone cautious.

Theo shrugged one shoulder. “Bribed a House Elf.” He said casually. Looking around her
room, like it was the first time he actually took it all in. Hermione eyed him wearily. Not sure
what to make of his inspection.

“Bribed them with what?” She finally asked as the silence began to feel suffocating. He
looked back at her, grinning with his teeth.

“I promised not to hex her if she lost one of my socks.” Hermione gasped, anger replacing
the calmness that had encompassed the room. Her mouth opened and closed, like a fish out of
water. Unsure what she wanted to say first. She lifted her hand to pull the blanket off of her
and give him a stern talking to, when all of a sudden-

Red, hot flames shot out of her hands, scorching the fabric, the anger drained from her, worry
taking its place. Before it could get any bigger, Theo was at her side, using his wand to douse
the fire.

“Fuck me sideways Granger.” Theo exclaimed, looking at her hand as if she were going to do
it again. “It was a joke, I just asked her to let me give you breakfast as a peace offering.” He
stared intently at her. His cocky smirk back in place. “They told us you were powerful, but –
Merlin's enlarged left tit – I didn’t know you were that powerful.”

She looked at him then, her panic had subsided a little but still bubbling under her skin, just
waiting to overtake her. “I didn’t - I – well, that wasn’t intentional - I mean I can’t- Theo- I'm
so sor-” Her breath caught in her throat, like clockwork, she began to hyperventilate, she
could feel the panic attack seize her limbs. Her eyes darted around the room, slowly
becoming blurry, she could feel strong hands pressing down on her shoulders trying to steady
her convulsing body.

The room felt hotter, as if someone had replaced the candles in her room with the sun itself.
The strong hands lifted, and she heard a muffled “Shit” before her bedroom door slammed
shut.

No, no, no.

Don’t leave, she thought, but her mind was cracking, she couldn’t force the words to pass
through her lips.
Suddenly, her eyes cleared, a blue – almost mirror like – ward surrounded her, she could see
her reflection in it as she was suspended in the air. She could hear glass smashing. Doors
being ripped off of hinges, fabric ripping. She could do nothing but stare.

The reflection looking back at her was nodding in encouragement, eyes almost black but she
could see traces of brown, an almost deranged smile on her lips; still completely bruised, her
split lip splitting even more as her reflection bit down, tongue swiping out to taste her own
blood.

Hermione felt her own teeth pierce deeper into her lip, gasping as her reflection was now
identical to how she felt. Her horrified expression stared back at her and before she knew it,
she plummeted back down onto the now torn bed.

An eerie silence settled over her room as she caught her breath. Once she was sure she could
breathe normally, she sat up. Her eyes swept the bedroom, windows shattered, doors split and
completely off their hinges, Theo’s chair now lay in heap of fabric and splintered wood, the
floor had a gaping hole in it, the sofas shredded, slipping deeper into the hole in the floor, the
bathroom was a state, the dirty water she had left now spilling out into the main room. Her
wardrobe was in tatters, clothes torn. Specs of debris raining down from the cracked ceiling.
Smoke rolled off of the walls in waves. Walls blackened.

Demolished.

Everything demolished.

What if she really was just a problem?

Destined to cause chaos wherever she went, leaving nothing but dead bodies in a trail behind
her as she passed from place to place.

Was this it? Would she finally go through with the thoughts that plagued her mind most days?

Should she take herself out of the equation for the greater good?

Liability.

Evil.

Not worth saving.

Would Neville be waiting for her with open arms? His lopsided grin plastered on his face for
her?

Before she knew what she was doing, she raised her wand to her chest, the tip poking
painfully over her heart.

“Avada-”

“Expelliarmus!” Her wand flew out of her hand, into Theo’s expectant one. She turned her
head to look at him. His messy hair even messier, wide eyes fixed on her. His lips were
moving but she couldn’t hear anything, there was only a loud ringing in her ears. She
watched him approach her, much like how you would approach a skittish, terrified animal.

His lips were still moving as he took a seat next to her, his hands rested on her shoulders
giving her a shake. Slight movement over his shoulder caught her attention.

Noise returned to her ears, the weight of what just occurred hitting her like a tonne of bricks.
She collapsed forward, face smushing against Theo’s chest, he slung his arms round her
shoulders, holding her tightly her while she dry sobbed against him, incapable of tears. Her
body shuddered against him as she stared at the mess she had caused.

A face swam into her vision, and for the second time, the dark lord was on his knees, looking
at her with concern.

She could hear his conversation with Theo, yet he never took his eyes off of her.

“She accidently set the bed on fire, started to have a panic attack. The whole room set on fire,
then everything just broke around her, that's when I came to get you.”

“How do you know this?”

“I was in the room with her sir.”

“How did you gain access?”

Theo stumbled over his words for a moment.

“I let him in.” Hermione heard herself say. She could feel the large intake of breath in Theo’s
chest. She lifted her head then to look at him. His expression was guarded, unsure as to why
she had lied for him.

“You let him in?” Questioned the dark lord. She averted her eyes, looking back at Voldemort.

“Someone knocked, I thought it might be you. When I opened the door, Theo was standing
there with breakfast for me, so I invited him in. We were once potions partners.” The lie
came easy to her, she took a deep breath, inhaling the remnants of smoke. Voldemort looked
unconvinced but nodded anyway.

“What caused the panic attack, Miss Granger?” He asked. Another deep breath, another lie on
her tongue.

“I drank some water Theo had offered; my mind went back to the time the Order would
deprive me of basic human rights to satiate my parched throat after hours of torture. They
would leave it so close, yet so far out of reach. I was too injured to crawl to where they had
put it, but by the time I gave up, I was too dehydrated and weak to want it anymore. It
overwhelmed me and I panicked at the thought that someone might take the water away from
me again.” Another deep breath, it wasn’t a lie, that had actually happened. It just wasn’t
what happened with Theo.

He nodded, still unconvinced by the look in his eyes but, he didn’t press further on the matter.
“What did you experience during your uncontrolled magic mishap?” Hermione was vaguely
aware that Theo had pulled her onto his lap, his hold on her tighter, fingers rubbing soothing
circles on her shoulder.

“It’s happened once before, only without the fire being so big. Last time it burnt off the ropes
that confined me. A power surge really, a protection ward; almost like a mirror but it’s a pale
blue, it surrounds me. I can see a different version of myself, or maybe it is me, I'm not quite
sure.” She worried her bottom lip, hissing at the pain as she reopened her wound. “I can hear
everything that’s going on around me, but so far, I can't seem to look away from the
reflection, and then when I fall and the magic dies, only then can I see the chaos I caused.”

She swept her eyes over the part of the room she could see. Shame tried to crawl its way into
her features, she was too numb to hide it. Letting it take shape, consuming her.

“One last question.” Hermione returned her gaze back to Voldemort. “Why does Theodore
have your wand?” Her eyes widened a fraction. Oh gods. She almost did it, Theo had stopped
her.

“I - I tried-” Her voice broke a few times before she finally whispered the sentence. Tears
now spilling freely. “I tried to end it, my life my lord.” If Theo hadn't gotten to her in time –
Luna, she would have left Luna all alone. Luna needed her, how could she have been so
selfish.

“Granger, you are not selfish.” Theo muttered into her hair. Hermione snapped her eyes to
his. Still wondering if he could read her mind. He must have known she was thinking it
because he let out a small non-laugh. “You said that all out loud.”

She hadn't realised her mouth was open until it snapped shut. She rested her full weight
against Theo then, exhaustion overtaking any response she could have formed.

“Can I sleep now?” She whispered into the air.

Voldemort stood, his hand cupping her chin as he looked down at her.

“We have a spare room if that would suffice?” Before she could answer, Theo hooked his arm
under her legs, cradling her to his chest and he stood.

“She can take my room, while I repair the damage to this room.” Voldemort looked at him
quizzically for a second then nodded his head.

Theo carried her out of the room. She couldn’t lift her head from his shoulder. Couldn’t even
open her eyes, but she felt the stares of the others as he carried her away from their prying
eyes.

“You'll like my room Granger,” He whispered against her forehead. “Very Slytherin, although
I only use it when I stay over, which is basically all the time now.” Hermione was grateful for
his distraction, as he prattled on about why she should love green and silver and not red and
gold. She felt unsteady as he bounced up the stairs, but he constantly talked until he shoulder
barged the door to his room open. Carefully laying her on the bed. Pulling the covers from
under her to tuck her in.

He held a vial to her lips; she drank it without a second thought, the familiar taste of
dreamless sleep now coursing its way through her system.

“Why are you being so nice to me?” She blurted once he finished making sure she was
tightly tucked into bed.

He just stared at her for a minute or so. Then he bent low, kissing her forehead. “I was once
new here Granger, I don’t care about your blood status, if the dark lord can look past it for
you, then so should everyone else. You suffered for years; don’t you think you deserve a little
kindness?” He stroked the stray hairs away from her face.

“You don’t think I'm evil?” She asked sheepishly, almost childlike.

“I don’t think you're evil. I think you're a powerful badass witch and I wouldn’t want to get
on your bad side.” He smiled softly at her; she felt her eyes droop. “What the Order did to
you was evil Granger, they saw someone with more magical capability than them and tried to
snuff it out before it even had a chance to become something great.” She looked at him
through the slits of her half-closed eyes as he headed for the door.

“You’re a great witch Hermione, someone who glows like you does not deserve the evil
things that have happened to them. I'm nice to you because I want to be your friend. I think
you deserve the feeling of being appreciated, you deserve a real friend. I would like to be that
for you, if you'll have me.” A small smile spread across her lips.

“I think I'd like that Theo.” He grinned at her from the open door.

“Get some rest Granger, I'll be back later to see you.” Sleep was catching up to her now, her
body went limp, eyes closed fully.

“Theo?” She called out, quietly.

“Hm?”

“Thank you.” The door shut behind him, she could feel that he reset the wards. Just before
she fell asleep, she thought she heard voices outside the door.

“Is she okay?”

“Yeah, she's sleeping.”

“Can we talk to her?”

“Tomorrow, let her rest.”

Sleep came quick, she was grateful that Theo had given her the dreamless sleep potion. Her
first night in years without nightmares to wake her.
Chapter End Notes

Hi all, i'm going to try my best to do weekday updates:}

but for now, updates every sunday!
 Chapter 10
Chapter Summary

Memories
2000

Chapter Notes

Early update because I won’t be able to upload tomorrow x

The sunlight creeping in was warm against her face. Nestling deeper into the bed, she felt the
heat of another body next to her, she was curled into the side of them. Slowly, she cracked
one eye open, lifting it to see the slumbering face of Theo.

He lay on his back, one arm under the pillow her head rested on, the other arm slung over his
chest. She moved back slightly as to not wake him up.

A part of her brain was telling her that this was weird, the other was remembering what
happened yesterday that warranted her being in his bed. The memories flashed behind her
eyes, to vividly that her body shuddered, she released a shaky breath.

Theo stirred beside her, opening his eyes to look down at her.

“Good morning Granger, I am rather pleased to see you not poking your wand in my face.”
He smiled at her, lifting himself into a seated position. She moved back even more then,
slowly, painfully lifting herself to do the same. She pulled the blanket with her, sitting
somewhat awkwardly cross-legged.

“Why are you in bed with me?” She asked.

“It is my bed.” He smirked.

“Oh- well yes, I suppose it is.” Embarrassment swells in her chest, averting her eyes to the
bed covers. “Why didn’t you wake me? I would have gone back to my room.”

“I didn’t feel the need to.” He said nonchalantly. A comfortable silence settled over the room
before Theo broke it.

“How do you feel?” Theo asked, she shrugged her shoulder, fidgeting with the corner of the
blanket – lifting her eyes to look at him through her lashes.
“I’m fine.” He cocked one eyebrow, the look in his eyes was unconvinced. He moved about
on the bed, mirroring her as he sat cross-legged, pulling a pillow to rest on his folded legs.

“Wanna try that again?” This all felt so surreal to her. Just nights ago, she was fighting for her
life, escaping a prison she had been held in for two years. Losing someone she loved,
accepting the help offered by someone who was supposed to despise her.

Now, she was sitting on a bed, with Theodore Nott, who had saved her life only hours ago.
To any on lookers it would look like they were gossiping like fifth years, both relaxed in each
other's presence.

Hermione huffed out a short breath. “About as okay as I can be.” Theo quirked an eyebrow,
waiting for her to say more. Closing her eyes, she took a deep breath. “It was my birthday
two days ago, the day we escaped, the day Neville-“ she sucked in a breath, she didn’t want
to cry.

“You don’t have to talk about it. I didn’t mean to make you upset.” Lifting her head to look at
Theo - he gave her a reassuring smile, she nodded, noting that one tear had escaped, she
wiped it away. She was glad he didn’t make her talk about it, she wasn’t ready.

He lifted his wand, Hemione flinched. If he saw it, he didn’t make it known. Holding out his
hand, he conjured a glass of water and offered it to her.

She took it, sipping slowly. The water felt good on her throat, her stomach rumbled. Theo’s
low chuckle could be heard, slowly lifting her eyes to him, she watched as he called out.
“Lele.” For a second nothing happened. And then the crack of apparition.

A small House Elf Hermione had seen before, appeared in the room. She wrung her hands
together, her little ears flopping as she walked closer to them. “Master Nott,” She bowed.
“What can Lele do for you?” Theo got off of the bed, crouching down to be eye level with
the House Elf, taking her hands in his.

“Could you bring us some breakfast, Miss Granger hasn’t eaten in a while.” The house elf
lifted her eyes, widening almost unnaturally at the sight of Hermione.
Hermione smiled at her.

“Miss Granger!” She exclaimed, rocking from heel to toe.

“What can Lele get you?” Hermione was silent for a beat, considering what she could
possibly eat that wouldn’t make her throw up.

“Just a bit of everything please Lele.” Theo said. Hermione watched Lele’s features crumple
with disappointment as she looked back at Theo. She felt bad that the house elf thought she
was ignoring her.

“Thank you, Lele.” Hermione watched as the disappointment morphed into excitement as she
looked at her – Smiling softly at the house elf as it disapparated away.

“Would you like to shower before you eat?” Theo asked as he walked into the bathroom,
using his wand to turn the on the shower. She watched as he set some clothes on a bench,
reaching up to pluck some cleaning products from a cupboard, placing them on a shelf inside
the shower.

He left the bathroom, coming up to stand by the bed, holding out his hand. She stared at his
hand, warring with herself. She knew she needed help – hated the thought of asking – but she
was weak, every part of her ached. She still wasn’t stable on her feet so – with slight
reluctance – she took his hand.

He looped an arm around her waist, lifting her slightly until her feet hit the ground. Keeping
his firm hold on her – he walked with her into the bathroom.

“Everything you need is right here.” He gestured around the room. “I don’t have any clothes
other than mine – so they may be bigger on you, but you have my permission to shrink them
to your size.” He grinned down at her, his tone playful as he pointed to the folded-up clothes
on the bench.

Now that she stood next to him, she could really take him in – he was about a foot taller than
her, muddy green eyes, messy brown hair. Sharp jawline and small yet full lips.

“Thank you, Theo.” She squeezed his hand before letting go – walking towards the running
shower.

She heard him walk out of the bathroom, closing the door behind him. Quickly undressing –
she stepped under the spray of the shower, letting the hot water rain over her.

Now alone, her mind began to race. Everything that has happened to her – everything the
order put her through – Neville and Luna. Two of the only people that have shown her
kindness in the last two years – brought her a sense of peace – now one of them is gone.

Theo’s kindness, how he's gentle without being pitying. He jokes without being malicious. A
new friend.

That puzzled her for a moment. Did she consider Theo a friend already? He hadn't done
anything to prove her otherwise – so yes, she considered Theo a friend.

She wasn’t sure if it was tears or water she washed away from her face.

Limbs aching by the time she had finished, Hermione stepped out of the shower – grabbing a
towel to dry off. Pulling the clothes from the bench, she dressed quickly – the short sleeve T-
shirt was too big – stopping mid-thigh – the jogging bottoms falling down – she spun around,
looking for her wand to adjust them to her size.

She couldn’t find it. Tears filled her eyes, panic over taking her mind. She wrenched open the
bathroom door, taking fast steps towards the bed. Reaching it, she frantically searched – but it
wasn’t there.

“Granger?” Theo called from somewhere in the room, she didn’t look at him when she
replied.
“My- Theo- I can't find it- my wand, where is it!” She threw pillows off the bed, one hand
clutched at her chest as she began to hyperventilate.

No – she thought – she had to calm down, she couldn’t lose control of her magic again.

Theo came up behind her, wrapping his arms around her waist, sitting her in between his
open legs on the bed. One hand stroked her cheek, she clutched his arm still wrapped around
her waist whilst he slowly rocked them back and forth.

“The dark lord has your wand, Granger. It's safe – you're safe, it's okay.” She let out a
relieved breath, focusing on Theo’s heart beats, using the rhythm to calm herself enough to
gain control of her breathing.

“I’m sorry, I just- I couldn’t find it- I-I panicked.”

“You don’t need to apologise to me Granger, it's okay, I understand.” He continued to stroke
her cheek, wiping away a few stray tears. For a few minutes she allowed herself to be
consumed by Theo’s body heat – in his reassuring whispers that she will be okay.

A knock at the door pulled her out of her bubble of comfort. Theo rearranged them so she
was laying on the bed as he got up and opened the door – not wide enough for her to see who
was there. They spoke in hushed whispers.

“Who is it, Theo?” She called out, watching the muscles in his back tense under his shirt.

“Someone wants to introduce themselves, but if you aren't ready, they can go.” His carefree
attitude she had become accustomed to was gone. He didn’t seem uncomfortable, more –
dare she say – protective.

“It’s okay, they can come in.” She said, sitting up in the bed. He didn’t open the door any
wider, just turned his head to look at her.

“Are you sure Granger?” She nodded. With what looked like a hefty amount of reluctance – a
whisper of “Be nice” – Theo opened the door.

In walked Pansy Parkinson, her once short hair was now long, blue eyes looking at Hermione
– but there was no malice in her stare.

“I heard you were keeping my boyfriend busy.” She smirked; Hermione's eyes darted to Theo
who shook his head – pinching the bridge of his nose.

“Pans.” He warned.

“Oh, calm it Theodore, I'm only teasing.” Pansy rolled her eyes, climbing onto the bed to sit
opposite Hermione, who – in her defence – recoiled slightly away from the other girl.

Another roll of her eyes, Pansy stretched out her legs on the bed, rested her back against the
footboard and examined her nails.
“So, Granger, the talk around the Manor is – you're one of us now, is that correct?” She
stopped her inspection of her nails, eyes staring straight into Hermione's as one perfect
eyebrow raised on her forehead.

Cautiously – pulling the covers with her – Hermione sat up straight, eyeing the raven-haired
girl. A part if her dreaded looking so weak in front of Pansy, the other – tired – part of her,
the much stronger side, didn’t feel the need to care as much.

Pansy had bullied her in school – made it her mission to make her life hell, but they have all
grown up, maybe – and it’s a big maybe – Hermione thought she should give her a chance.

“You can talk to me Granger, I don’t bite.”

“She does.” When Hermione looked at Theo, humour had returned to his features.

“Only when it comes to you, love.” A seductive smile formed on Pansy’s lips as she looked
at Theo. It quickly dissipated as she looked back at Hermione – settling into one that looked
friendly.

“I guess I am one of you now.” Hermione said a bit sheepishly – still unsure of how to act in
Pansy’s company.

Pansy nodded her head. “Brilliant, who wouldn’t want the brightest witch of our age on their
side.”

“The Order.” Hermione faltered at her own response, looking down at her hands – absently
scratching at her cuticles. She knew the order didn’t want her – had known for years, but it
still hurt to think about.

“Granger?” Theo sat beside her, taking one of her hands in both of his. Hermione looked at
him, then at Pansy – who didn’t seem bothered by him holding her hand – and then back at
Theo. “We want you here.” Conviction heavy in his tone. She nodded her head, taking her
hand out of Theo’s, looking back to Pansy – who's face had softened a little.

“I’m sorry, I don’t want to make you feel uncomfortable.” Hermione said watching Pansy’s
face soften that little bit more.

“I’m not uncomfortable Granger, we all have a little idea of what’s happened to you.”
Hermione nodded again, not really sure what to say because they didn’t know the full extent
of what she had endured.

“If you want my opinion – because who wouldn’t – I think the order are hypocritical.” Pansy
said, Hermione perked up a little at that.

“So do I.” Pansy smiled at her. In return, Hermione relaxed a little more on the bed.

“See Granger, we’re already in agreement, I think we will be great friends.” Hermione smiled
at the witch opposite her. Her head felt a little lighter, convincing her that giving Pansy a
chance wasn’t such a bad idea.
“May I ask you a question?” Pansy asked – calm façade shifted to grimace, clearly not
wanting to break the relaxed atmosphere, but her curiosity won out. Hermione nodded
bracing herself.

“Why haven't you healed yourself?” Startling realisation hit Hermione; she had almost
forgotten she was covered head to toe in bruises. She wanted to slip under the covers, hide
her face away from them.

She shifted uncomfortably, rolling her shoulders – trying and failing to feel confident. “I don't
completely trust myself with magic right now.” Pansy gave her a soft smile, moving up the
bed to sit closer to her.

“Are you afraid you’ll hex off your face?” There was a smile forming on Pansy’s face, she bit
her lip to try and hide it. “We wouldn’t want that now would we, I don’t admit this to many
people, but I remember in school, I was always jealous of how naturally beautiful you were,
your hair on the other hand, was rather large.” Tears formed in the corners of Hermione's
eyes, but despite that, a laugh bubbled out of her throat.

“Just another thing I can't control.” Her laughter subsided – yet a smile still remained on her
lips. She wiped away a few stray tears that managed to fall, relaxing even more – settling her
back against the pillows.

“I can help, if you want.” Pansy offered, pulling her wand out of her pocket. Hermione
flinched – if Pansy noticed, she didn’t make it known.

“Help with what?” Hermione asked, she knew Pansy wasn’t going to hex her, but her heart
beat erratically in her chest anyway.

“Healing your face for a start, then fixing that owls nest on your head.” Pansy grinned,
waving her wand in the space between them, conjuring a small tub of – what Hermione
recalled – a bruise healing paste.

Without uttering a word, she met Pansy’s kind eyes and nodded. The blue-eyed witch got
onto her knees, straddling Hermione's legs between her thighs. Slowly raising her wand, she
healed the cuts on Hermione's face. She felt her split lip stitch itself back together. Another
swish of her wand – the ache in Hermione's whole body had gone.
Cautiously, Pansy dipped her finger into the paste – carefully applying it to Hermione's face.

She sucked a sharp breath through her teeth – the cold paste made her face feel like it was
burning. Theo interlocked his fingers with hers, she squeezed his hand but didn’t look away
from Pansy. Her mind reeled – in such a short time, people she thought would hate her had
been nothing but kind. People she always thought were evil, who couldn’t possess such a
feeling had proved her wrong.

She was a muggle-born, they were purebloods – not the dark lord but, he held so much power
over purebloods – she was an order member, them death eaters.

Gryffindor.
Slytherin.

Nothing made sense – yet everything made sense. They took care of their own, she was one
of them now. A part of her thought – maybe – they were only nice to her because the dark
lord commanded it, but he was nowhere in sight.

This act of kindness from Pansy was of her own volition. She didn’t have to do this, but she
chose to. She was giving Hermione a taste of friendship and she would cling to it.

With Neville gone, her only true friend that remained was Luna. Small interactions over two
years with Luna and Neville were the only times she experienced true warmth and
compassion from another person.

Their trio had been cut down by monsters who claimed they were the good in the world.
They may not have killed her physically, but a part of her died with Neville that night.

“All done, they should fade a lot more in an hour or so.” Pansy wiped a tear from her cheek –
pulling Hermione out of her thoughts.

“Thank you, Pansy.” Hermione whispered, afraid if she spoke any higher – her voice would
crack, and she would never stop crying.

“No need for that, Granger.” Pansy sat back, one leg under her – the other hanging off the
side of the bed.

The next few hours passed, jokes and teasing all in good jest, Pansy adjusted Theo's jogging
bottoms for her so they fit right before they tucked into the breakfast that Lele had brought –
her stomach could only handle a few slices of toast.

Hermione relaxed completely in Pansy’s presence – even when Theo looped an arm around
her shoulder, tucking her into his side while Pansy stayed propped up against the foot board.
Hermione hadn't laughed this much in a while. They told her stories of their younger years.

When Pansy relayed the story of Theo's first attempt at apparition – which ultimately ended
with his head stuck in the toilet, Hermione came to the realisation that she was right – giving
Pansy a chance was worth it.

There was a knock at the door before it opened. Voldemort entered – eyes scanning over them
all. Their laughter diminished, Pansy and Theo sat up straighter.

“Miss Granger,” he eyed her. “I assume Miss Parkinson is here with your invitation.”

“Yes, my lord,” He hummed, nodding his head. She didn’t want Pansy to get into trouble.
“She has been nothing but kind, my lord. I enjoy her company.” She didn’t look at Pansy,
keeping her eye contact with Voldemort.

“Yes, well I would expect nothing less.” He walked over to the bed, stopping when he
reached Hermione. “I require your presence so that we can begin training.” He offered his
arm to her. She untangled herself from Theo, sliding off the bed, hooking her arm through
Voldemort's.

She said goodbye, promising to see them later as she shut the door behind her. Arm in arm,
they walked down a long corridor – they reached the stairs, his hand resting on the small of
her back as he guided down.

They turned a corner, walking towards an all too familiar room. Her breath lodged in her
throat as she took in the foreboding doors.

“The-I can't-don’t make me, please.” Her stomach sank, heart in her throat as he led them
closer to the drawing room. She tried to dig her heels into the marble floor – he tugged her
anyway, stopping just before the doors.

“Miss Granger,” he turned her so that she was looking at him. Her eyes wide – panic
beginning to surface. “I understand the significance of this room, it is why I strongly believe
that using it to control your magic is the best option.”

The reasonable side of her understood where he was coming from, a room she was tortured in
has memories. She could use those memories as a main focus point – use the feelings
associated with it so, when she panics – her magic wouldn’t spin out of control and destroy
everything.

Sucking down a big breath, willing herself to calm down – she turned, taking a step forward,
putting her hands on the doorknobs, with the pressure applied, she twisted them – pulling the
doors open.
 Chapter 11
Chapter Summary

Memories
2000

The drawing room looked the same as the first time she saw it.

She walked further into the room, holding her breath as she came to stand in front of the spot
where Bellatrix had maimed her. She could still see her blood staining the marble floor.
Maybe it was a trick of light, maybe not, but she swore she could see the indentation of her
body – carved into the floor.

The smell of death still lingered – almost chocking her it was that thick.

“I don’t think this is the best idea.” She whispered, never taking her eyes off of the ground.
She could hear Voldemort move about the room – felt him when he crowded her back,
standing behind her.

“Miss Granger, look at me,” Slowly turning around, she looked at him – watching as he
stared down at her. “I can assure you; this is the best place. You are safe here, I am with you.”
He spoke with such conviction – she was induced to believe him. He handed her wand to her
– she tossed it from hand to hand.

“Okay, let’s begin then.” She moved around him, walking to the opposite side of the room –
wand in hand, she stood tall, awaiting his instructions.

“I need you to channel the same adrenaline you felt when you escaped from the order, do you
think you can do that?” She wasn’t sure if she could – wasn’t sure if she could muster up that
much strength. Survival was the only thing on her mind that night – survival and protection.
Voldemort has told her she's safe with him, she doesn’t feel the instinct to fight for her life.

There was only one way this could possibly work – well hopefully.

“I need you to hurt me,” she said, nodding her head – rolling her shoulders. “I need to feel
like you're going to kill me for this to work.”

He cocked his head to the side – studying her for a minute. A slight dip of his chin as
confirmation. “As you wish.”

Before she even had a chance to raise her wand, he shot a stinging hex at her – beginning to
circle her. It hit her in the side, she moved to cradle it but was hit with another – this time in
the knee.
Lifting her wand, she tried to shoot a stupefy. It hit – but what came out of her wand was not
the same spell. Voldemort flew across the room, his back hitting the wall – sliding down it
until he hit the ground. She gasped, lowering her wand to her side, making her way towards
him.

Faster than humanly possible – he got to his feet, hitting her with a diffindo. The spell sliced
her upper thigh. He shot her with another – slicing her wand arm, another to her other arm.
She couldn’t keep up, trying for a protego.

Nothing happened – she tried again. Nothing. Panic rose in her chest – strong. She couldn’t
protect herself. He advanced on her, silently cursing her as he got closer. She tried again,
nothing. Her wand felt useless in her hand, she was exhausted. Panic swallowed her whole.

The moment he got within six feet of her – she felt it. Her feet left the ground, a protective
ward surrounded her. Magic coursed through her, she watched herself in the ward – black
eyes looked back at her.

“Kill him.” The reflection whispered. Over and over again.

“You can do it, he wants to hurt you, KILL HIM!” The reflection screamed at her. She looked
away – for the first time being able to see past her reflection self. Voldemort stood below her,
watching on in amazement. The only thing she could focus on was the wand in his hand.
Lifting hers she aimed it at him.

The first set of lights to leave her wand were grey – confining his body in chains. The second
set were red – she watched on as his body began convulsing. The third set were a bright
orange – fire consumed his writhing body.

Exhaustion washed over her – so fast, her eyes rolled back. She felt herself fall, her body
hitting the ground.

When she opened her eyes, they focused on the cracked ceiling above her head. She was still
in the drawing room.

She could hear whispering to the side of her – turning her head to see Voldemort waving his
wand over her. His skin burnt; clothing charred. He just concentrated on healing her injuries.

“Miss Granger, can you sit up for me?” He asks – using her hands to push off the floor – she
pushes herself into a seated position. Turning her head to check the room – the chandelier
was in pieces on the floor, chairs had been set on fire, the walls, floor and ceiling cracked in
places.

She knew it wouldn’t happen the first time – but was still incredibly upset that she couldn’t
control her magic.

“Miss Granger,” Voldemort called her name, she looked at him. “It will take a while for you
to be in control of your own magic, as it is new magic you have no knowledge of.” Tears
threatened to spill from her eyes. His insinuation that he may know what magic she possessed
didn’t pass by her, only sparking her interest. She just didn’t have it in her to question it –
maybe later. “With that being said, while it was a short session, we have made significant
progress.”

“But I destroyed the room my lord.” She whispered. How could he say they have made
progress when the room was in a state.

“You also focused a large amount on me. I have never seen a spell like that, or it being cast
wordlessly.” He said, quite proudly.

“But I also hurt you, why are you not angry with me?” His eyes softened as he looked at her.
She stared back, wondering if this was the calm before the storm.

“I knew the risks when I entered the room with you. I was aware I may be harmed in the
process – but I am protected and will not die, no matter what you throw at me.”

“Because of your horcrux’s.” It wasn’t a question – he knew it wasn’t a question. A smile

spread on his face.

“Yes Miss Granger, because of my horcrux’s. I was wondering when you were going to
mention those.” Hermione – a little stunned that he just outright told her – looked at him,
mouth slightly open. She didn’t understand why he was so open with her, but she would push
her luck.

“We destroyed most of them,” she listed the ones they had destroyed from memory. His eyes
widening slightly at the mention of the Diadem and the cup. “That would leave only one left,
after you destroyed one yourself.”

“Destroyed one myself?” He inquired, looking a little confused. If he can be truthful with her,
she can return the favour.

“Yes, my lord,” she took a breath, staring straight into his eyes. “Harry.”

“Are you certain of this?” He asked, she watched him piece it together in his mind.

“I’m certain, once Harry told us that Nagini was one, I realised that it can be living beings.
He could also see into your mind and, had a dream from Nagini’s perspective. Once you put
all the pieces into place, it was quite clear. The reason Harry didn’t die that night in the battle
was because you accidently made him into a horcrux when you killed his parents and then
tried to kill him when he was a baby.”

She took a breath, never really intending to tell him like this, so quickly – without the fear of
him killing her on the spot for being an accomplice to his attempted downfall. There was a
new level of trust between them now – both having the chance to lie, simply not doing so.

He stared at her for a moment in – bewilderment? Awe? She wasn’t quite sure, whatever it
was – the look bordered both.

“I knew you were intelligent, Miss Granger, but you continue to surprise me.” His praise of
her made her blush.
“Thank you, my lord.”

“You are welcome, my dear. Now let's get you off the floor.” His hand caressed her cheek
before in one fluid movement, he got to his feet – holding out his hand for her to take. She
did, gripping his hand to pull herself up. She let go, brushing the debris from the floor off of
her trousers.

“Are we doing more training?” Truthfully, she didn’t want to, her magic – alongside her
whole body – was spent, but she also knew that she was far from being in control. If more
training is what he suggested, then that is what she would do.

“It would be wise for us to continue, but we cannot,” a visibly relieved sigh slipped past her
lips, tense shoulders – she didn’t realise they were tense – relaxed. “I have a meeting with my
followers in ten minutes, but we will continue tomorrow.” Using wandless magic, he healed
himself, his robes returned to normal. Gesturing with a tilt of his head for her to follow, they
walked out of the drawing room into the hall. The air was fresher out here – she finally felt
like she could breathe properly. He led her through the same corridors.

As she was walking past the stairs – wondering why he wasn’t taking her back to her room –
she caught sight of a familiar face.

At the top of the staircase stood Draco Malfoy, adorned in death eater robes, his hair messy
like he had just woken up. His usual sneer she always saw him wear wasn’t there. His face
was blank – guarded. But the slight tilt of his head, the look in his eyes, is what gave him
away.

He was curious.

Curious about her. He had to know she was here; it was common knowledge by now. Yet the
way his eyes studied her – like he wanted to know all of her deepest darkest secrets, without
interacting with her – like she was a something new he had never seen before, made her skin
heat up. She fidgeted with the long sleeves of her T-shirt, looking away from him.

It had been two years since she saw him – she wanted to turn around, to get a good look at
him. It was a bad idea, she knew it. Using all of her focus, she followed alongside Voldemort
as he led them through the kitchen – into the garden.

They walked side by side down the stone pathway. Her feet crunching under the gravel. The
garden was huge, red and white roses grew each side of the pathway which led to a larger
area filled with a variety of different types of other plants.

Off to the left, Luna and Narcissa were knee deep in a flower bed, their backs facing
Hermione. She couldn’t make out what they were saying over the wind – only hearing their
hushes voices.

Voldemort cleared his throat, causing the two women to turn around and look at them.
Narcissa gracefully got to her feet, tapping Luna’s shoulder – her head tipping in a bow
towards the dark lord and giving Hermione a motherly smile before she left.
“I shall leave you with Miss Lovegood, but should you need anything, you can find me in my
office on the second floor.” Hermione nodded at him, turning to watch as he disappeared up
the pathway. She felt unsafe – being left alone without magic or him to protect her. That was
until she felt a hand tap her shoulder.

“Hello, Hermione.” Luna said in her usual dreamy voice. Throwing her arms around the
blonde witch – Hermione clung to her like a lifeline. Instantly breaking down when she felt
Luna’s arms circle her waist. They both needed this, Hermione knew it the second she felt
Luna hug her tighter – her shoulder becoming wet with tears.

They stood there for a while – each a comfort to the other. The wind whistled around them,
yet time itself seemed to stop – if only to give them this moment together, a moment where
being in each other's arms meant that they would be okay. As long as they had each other, life
could not break them. They have been bonded by copious amounts trauma – but they will be
stronger for it because they’re together.

Luna pulled back first, using the sleeve of her jumper to wipe her red rimmed eyes. Hermione
did the same – wiping her eyes with the sleeve of her shirt.

“What are you doing out here?” Hermione asked, linking her arm with Luna’s. She walked
them closer to a different flowerbed, pointing to it.

“Narcissa was helping me plant Neville’s flower,” she sniffled, looking down at the fresh soil
longingly. “I wanted a piece of him to be wherever we are. Since he made them, they’ll
always be a part of him and in extension – us.”

“He would love that.” Hermione looked down at the flowerbed, watching the flowers grow.
Narcissa must have charmed them to grow quicker.

“I have to speak to you about something,” Luna conjured a bench for them, slightly tugging
Hermione along with her to sit down. “I would like you to come with me to visit Neville
soon.”

Panic creeped up inside her, she did her best to tamp it down. Going outside the safety of the
Manor meant she would be out in the open, giving the order free reign to find her – if they
were still looking for her – capture her, maybe even kill her. Luna wouldn’t be safe if she was
with her either. She may be able to use adrenaline fuelled magic, but what if she lost control,
her magic was unpredictable at the moment anything could happen.

“Hermione?” Luna’s voice pulled her from her troubling thoughts. “The dark lord wouldn’t
let us go alone, Narcissa offered to go with us.” Relaxing at that, Narcissa wouldn’t sell them
out to the order. Voldemort trusted her, which meant Hermione could trust her and Luna
seems to trust her as well – that was good enough for her.

“Okay, if Narcissa accompanies us then I will come with you.” Luna hummed her approval.

Both girls sat on the bench – hand in hand. Sometimes they talked, other times they just sat in
comfortable silence, soaking up the tiny semblance of peace. They sat there until the sun
began to set.
Once the chill seeped through their clothes, they made their way inside. She didn’t want to go
into her room - wasn’t sure if she was ready, she thought about returning to Theo’s room, but
then thought better of it. As they reached their bedroom doors Luna spoke.

“Will you want to stay with me tonight, I don’t want to be alone.” A small pit formed in
Hermione’s stomach at Luna’s truth – because it was her truth as well. She did not want to be
alone, being alone would mean she would be left to her own thoughts – thoughts she didn’t
want to think about.

“Of course, Luna.” Both entered Luna’s room, it looked identical to hers. Luna pulled back
the covers on her bed, sliding in – tapping the empty space next to her. Hermione climbed in,
facing the other witch. Luna slid closer; Hermione pulled her into embrace, kissing her
forehead.

“I love you, Luna.” She whispered.

“I love you, Hermione.” She whispered back.

Just before sleep took hold, Hermione heard Luna whisper under her breath.

Goodnight Neville, I love you.

Draco

He stood half asleep at the top of the stairs. He’d stopped once he heard footsteps in the
corridor.

He swore to Salazar himself, if it was Theo on his way to talk about Granger again, he would
punch his oldest friend in the face. She had only been here for a day or so, and he was already
calling them best friends.

Draco saw her the night she arrived; she just didn’t see him. He purposely kept himself in the
shadows – watching her from afar. Her face was covered in cuts and bruises, she was thinner
that he remembered her being – she looked fragile, like one strong gust of wind would knock
her over. She clung to the dark lord like he was her lifeline.

He could see she was trying to be brave – trying to act like she wasn’t terribly frightened, but
her eyes gave her away. She focused on one specific spot on the wall, if she looked down a
few more inches – she would have seen him, caught him staring at her.

He wasn’t surprised to see her; he was the one who informed the dark lord that the order was
torturing her after he and Theo heard the two Weasley's talking about it. It was his idea to
house her in the manor. So, no, he wasn’t surprised to see her.

He was surprised to see the state she was in. He never expected to see her so defeated. The
spark that made her Hermione Granger was gone. She was a shell of her former self. Broken.

So, when she rounded the corner two days after, her bruises slightly faded – he couldn’t help
but stare. She almost looked like the Granger he knew two years ago, the one he saw at the
battle.

Keeping his face blank, he studied her. She was walking on her own without the support of
the dark lord.

As he watched her, he wondered just how much the order put her through. He only knew
little increments of what he had heard from the conversation between the Weasley’s. She
would have had to endure a lot. Not much could break Granger and yet – something had. He
wanted to know what.

But why would she talk to him, he has been nothing but cruel to her in the past. If he was her
– he would avoid him at all costs.

They probably wouldn’t interact at all. He was Voldemort's top death eater – his right-hand
man. He had duties to fulfil that took up a large portion of his time. She would most likely
keep by the dark lord's side. He wouldn’t let someone so valuable slip away from him.

As she looked away from him, he noted her shoulders set and her head face forward. Her
walk turned from leisurely to determined.

Descending the staircase, his head was filled with one thought.

What had broken Hermione Granger?

And why did he care?

 Chapter 12
Chapter Notes

updates will be sporadic for the time being, I will try to get as much out as quickly as
possible.
Thank you for being patient with me. I love writing this fic. I promise to do my best to
update as much as i can, when i can.

Luna slept peacefully next to her; the glow of the sun surrounding and highlighting her
angelic features. Hermione didn’t dare to move, knowing the witch needed as much rest as
possible.

Their conversation from the gardens yesterday, pushed its way to the forefront of her mind.

Luna gripped her hands tightly. “It's okay Hermione, I've agreed to it.”

“But Luna, it's going to hurt.” Hermione gripped her hands tighter – nails digging into the
soft skin.

“Hermione, I will be fine. Narcissa gave me a calming draught to take beforehand.”

“What if I did it with you? You wouldn’t have to do it alone then.”

Luna shook her head. “You’re not ready and you know it.”

Hermione wiped a tear from her cheek, setting her shoulders. “I will make myself ready, if it
means you won't suffer alone.” Luna lifted a hand, gently placing it on Hermione’s cheek –
thumb slowly soothing her scrunched face.

“It’s okay Hermione,” She repeated. “Tomorrow I'll take the dark mark.”

A shiver ran through her body, she wished she could do it with Luna – but Luna was right,
she wasn’t ready. She needed to properly heal before she subjected her body to any dark
magic of that extent.

She read somewhere that receiving the dark mark felt like your skin was burning – like your
whole arm was on fire. Wincing at the thought, she placed a soft hand on Luna’s face,
brushing away a few stray hairs.

Today will be a hard day for Luna, the least Hermione could do was to let her sleep for as
long as possible. To have these last few moments as a free witch, not one that would belong
to the dark lord.
The door cracked open, someone slipped inside.

“Miss Granger,” Narcissa greeted her, a kind smile on her lips. She held a tray full of an
assortment of breakfast foods. “Good morning.”

“Good morning.” Hermione said back, watching Narcissa place the tray on the table. She sat
down elegantly in the chair next to the bed, interlocking her hands and crossing them in her
lap.

Hermione didn’t know how to feel about Narcissa. Luna trusted her, but Hermione barely
knew the woman. She had a comforting air about her – like you would instantly know if she
did not like you, but also know if she wasn’t bothered by your presence.

“Miss Granger, if I may speak honestly,” Hermione nodded her head at her – wondering just
how honest she would be. “I would like to make it very clear; your blood status means
nothing to me; I do not care that you are a muggleborn. With that being said, I would also
like to give you the reassurance that I will do my best to keep you protected while you are
here. There are many of the older generation of death eaters that are not particularly happy by
your presence in the manor.”

Hermione knew this, the older generation have had more years to detest muggleborns – it’s
ingrained deep in their bones, so much so that she had no hope any of them would ever
accept her. That was okay though, she had no intentions of ever approaching any of them.
She laughed inside her head at the thought.

Narcissa offering to protect her – giving her something to build trust upon, giving her a
choice, believe what she was saying and gain more allies or not believe her. Hermione had to
admit to herself, continuing to be sceptical of Narcissa would be draining and a pointless
thing to do.

“Mrs Malfoy, if I may speak honestly myself,” Narcissa lifted her head slightly, bracing
herself for what she had to say. “I am aware that you already know what has happened to me
the past two years, which is why it will be hard for me to trust you.” Narcissa began to talk,
Hermione cut her off. “That being said,” she continued. “I think over time, I can get to a
point where I can. Luna trusts you and that is good enough for me, it’s a good place to start. I
trust Luna and her judgment.” Hermione gave her a small smile. A peace offering of sorts.

“Miss Granger, I never expected to gain your trust with a flick of my wand. I just wanted you
to know that you have a friend in me. I only know the details of what Mr Longbottom
informed me of,” Hermione’s face fell, Narcissa carried on. “I will never ask you for the
whole story, but I would also like you to know that if you would like to talk about it – about
any of it, I will be here to listen.” She mulled it over in her head for a few moments, picking
at the skin of her fingers. She didn’t know if she could ever really talk to anyone but Luna
about what happened to her. Maybe Voldemort, if he ever asked, maybe she would tell him.

“Thank you.” The only response she could think to say. This was all new to her. Yes, she had
accepted Theo’s and Pansy’s friendship very quickly, but that wasn’t to say she trusted them.
There was a sort of respect between them, but Hermione would not call it trust. Again, maybe
over time she could grow to trust them, but right now the only person she could
wholeheartedly trust was Luna.

Sweet, sweet Luna, who will be taking the mark because it was her only option to stay safe.
To keep them both safe. Hermione looked at the sleeping witch, a pit formed in Hermione's
stomach; she did not want to have to watch Luna screaming in pain – there was nothing she
could do to stop it, nothing at all. Guilt bloomed in the pit. None of this would be happening
if it wasn’t for her.

Narcissa placed a delicate hand on Hermione's, pulling her out of her thoughts. Hermione
almost pulled it away, but she let the older witch comfort her.

“You do not want Miss Lovegood to take the mark, do you?” Narcissa questioned, her voice
was soft, a tone only a mother could have. Hermione shook her head, to afraid that if she
spoke – even whispered – her voice would break, and her tears would fall. Narcissa curled
her fingers around Hermione’s hand, squeezing twice. “I would like to tell you a secret. I
never wanted Draco to take the mark, he was so young at the time, no child should have to
endure that pain,” a tear slipped from Narcissa’s eye – Hermione almost reached out to wipe
it away.

“I was young myself when I took the mark, so I know from experience.” Her last word was
choked out, as if she were experiencing it all over again. Hermione instinctively interlocked
their fingers – using her thumb to stroke reassuringly on the back of her hand. She wasn’t a
stranger to needing comfort, she may not trust Narcissa, but she didn’t want to see her
distressed.

Using her other hand, Narcissa pulled a handkerchief from the pocket of her robes. She
dabbed away the tears and continued.

“Draco screamed his throat raw when he was receiving the mark, it took him over a month
for the pain to subside, and I thought about what a terrible mother I was. I allowed my child,
my only son, to go through the most excruciating, painful magic.” She placed the
handkerchief back into her pocket. “But what you must understand Miss Granger, it was
either have him take the mark, or watch my son die. I would rather he go through a month of
pain, than never be able to hold him again.” A small part of her hurt for Malfoy – for the pain
he was subjected to. It felt odd, feeling something for him – for someone who wouldn't think
twice about her.

Narcissa was looking into Hermione’s eyes – searching for something. She must have found
it because she smiled. “I am not saying all of this to prove your fears, I am informing you
because, while you may never forget the pain, the physical does not last that long. That may
not be much of a comfort to you, but it is the only thing I can say to ease your mind.”

Hermione found herself wanting to show a little vulnerability. This would be a big step,
entrusting Narcissa with a secret. She lifted her hands, rubbing her fingertips against her eyes
and smoothing out her hair.

“Luna’s soul is rare. You will never find anyone like her. She is misunderstood, people
mistake her for a ditsy airhead, or crazy. But she isn't, she is so much more than that. Luna is
smart and creative; she sees things that our minds refuse to acknowledge, that doesn’t make
her a head case, it makes her so much more intelligent than all of us. We live in a world
where magic exists, who's to say Nargles and Wrackspurt’s can't be real.”

“She needs to be cared for, now, I don’t mean she needs someone by her side twenty-four
hours of the day. She can take care of herself; better than any witch I have ever known. But
that doesn't mean she doesn't need to know that someone cares for her.” She caught
Narcissa’s eyes, the older witch nodded her head – encouragement to continue.

“I have a sickly feeling, deep in my gut that the dark mark will strip away at her soul – that it
might corrupt what a good person she is.” Taking a deep breath, she looked over at the
sleeping witch next to her. “Luna hasn’t expressed her anger; she has been through a lot.
She’s bottling it up,” she looked back at Narcissa. “What if the dark mark causes that pain
and anger to consume her? I feel like, if that happens – if it rips her soul apart, she will be
heading down the same path that made Bellatrix.” A flash of hurt cut across Narcissa’s face –
the kind of hurt that only a sister can experience.

“I have no intention of offending you Mrs Malfoy, but I would die before I sat back and
watched as Luna became anything like Bellatrix.” Hermione watched as an array of emotions
flickered across Narcissa’s face, until her features settled into a tight yet calm expression.

“I take no offense; I would not wish for anyone to become another Bella.” Luna stirred beside
Hermione, the blonde witch lifted her arms in the air – stretching with a yawn. She looked
over at Hermione, smiling sweetly at her.

“Good morning, Hermione, good morning Narcissa.” Both Narcissa and Hermione said good
morning to Luna. They talked for a short while, Narcissa and Luna discussed plants.
Hermione zoned out until Narcissa addressed her.

“Miss Granger, I will escort you to your room if you would like, so we can allow Miss
Lovegood to get ready for today.” Hermione didn't want to leave Luna, but she knew
Narcissa was right. Luna might need time alone to mentally prepare herself for what she was
about to do. Hermione knew that when – even though she did not want to – she inevitably
takes the mark, she will need days to fully comprehend it.

“I’ll meet you outside when its time.” She took Luna’s hand in her own, gently kissing her
knuckles. Kicking her legs from the bed, she stood. Narcissa Held her arm out, Hermione
hesitantly interlocked their arms. Luna said goodbye to them as they closed the door.

They stopped outside her door. Narcissa took one of her shoulders in her grip, the other hand
tucked her hair behind her ear. Hermione didn't know what to make of the gesture. Her mind
instantly thought of her own mother, and how she missed her.

“Miss Lovegood will be okay, she will need you after the ceremony. Try to stay strong for her
Miss Granger.” Narcissa pulled her into an awkward hug. Hermione let her. It only lasted a
moment or so before Narcissa pulled away, she placed her hand on Hermione's cheek – her
eyes filled with sympathy. Hermione jerked at the contact, stepping away.
Narcissa must have sensed that she was uncomfortable, she nodded her head in goodbye, and
turned – walking away, down the corridor. Hermione stood stiffly next to her door, watching
Narcissa’s retreating form round a corner.

As she placed her hand on the door handle, she heard footsteps. She was torn between
completely ignoring them and curious to see who it was. Her curiosity won, she waited until
they got closer.

Theo rounded the corner, walking backwards, his hands moving animatedly as he spoke. He
turned his head and noticed her. He broke into soft jog towards her, completely forgetting his
earlier conversation. A relieved grin was split across his face as he stopped a few feet in front
of her. Again, she was pulled into another awkward hug. Except this time, Theo lifted her up
off of the ground. Her arms were trapped between them, slowly becoming numb from the
tightness in which he held her.

“Theo, put me down please.” Her mouth was smushed against his shoulder, her voice
muffled. He squeezed her one last time, slowly lowering her to the ground. Now that she had
both feet on the ground, she took him in. He was dressed in his death eater robes, presumably
ready for the ceremony in a few hours. He looked tired; his worry lines more prominent. His
grin had now formed into a grimace.

“Christ Granger, I just heard what happened, I assumed the worse when I realised, I hadn't
seen you since last night. What were you thinking?” He chastised.

“I was with Luna. What do you mean, you heard what happened?” She questioned; confusion
heavily laced in her voice.

“You tortured the dark lord and set him on fire. I expected you to have been punished.” He
rushed out.

“Why would I have been punished?”

“Because he’s the dark lord and you set him on fire.” Theo said, as if it was the easiest thing
in the world to understand. She shuffled on the spot, tucking a stray curl behind her ear.

“He actually praised me for it,” Theo’s eyes went wide. “Because for a split second, I could
actually control my magic, he wasn't angry with me.” Theo spluttered for a second, Hermione
noticed someone over his shoulder. She stepped slightly to the side, cocking her head to get a
look.

Malfoy stood, as if he were a statue, watching their interaction with a blank expression on his
face. He was in full death eater robes, his hair tousled, as if he had run his hands through it
multiple times. They held eye contact for a few seconds before he looked away, his hand
raking through his hair, his body impossibly stiff.

“Nott, we have to go.” He called out, his voice deeper than she expected. Theo turned to look
at him, holding his index finger up. He turned back to Hermione, pulling her into another hug
before pulling away.
“Can I see you later?” Theo asked, his face still creased in worry. “I’d like to take you on a
tour of the manor, make sure you’re comfortable and know where everything is.” Hermione
placed her hand on his upper arm, giving it a little squeeze.

“Of course, I would like that.” She smiled at him, turning away to open her bedroom door.
She heard Theo’s retreating footsteps. Before entering her room, she took one last look at the
two men. What she didn’t expect to see was Malfoy, he was looking at her, that curiosity
back in his eyes. He turned his head sharply forward when he realised, he’d been caught.

She didn't think much of it, couldn't think much of it. She looked around her room.
Everything was back to normal, as if she didn't nearly burn the whole thing down. On her bed
lay a set of black robes, similar to Theo’s death eater robes. A shudder rolled down her back,
her hands felt cold as she reached for it. It was soft like silk under her fingertips, yet thick
like a wool blanket. She could feel the magical protection enchantments that had been placed
on them.

Snatching her hand back, she headed for the shower. They had two hours until Luna’s
ceremony. Two hours before luna became an official death eater. Two hours to prepare herself
for what will come next. She feared once Luna took the mark, it wouldn't be long before it
was her turn.

She scrutinised herself in the mirror. Now adorned in full death eater robes. Did she tie her
hair up or did she leave it how it was?

The thing that freaked her out the most was how at home she looked in the outfit. Like she
was made to wear it. The black bodice fit like a glove, intricate silver spirals wove around her
breasts. Her trousers were black, almost like muggle leggings but thicker. Black boots that
stopped just above her knees. Everything about it should have revolted her, yet it didn't. Not
even the mask she held in her hand. She had never seen a death eater wear a mask like this
one. It was black, silver rimmed the eyes, but the difference was, where her mouth should be,
the illusion of flickering flames covered the bottom of the mask, over the nose, momentarily
shooting up, licking the forehead of the mask.

She was about to place the mask on her face when a knock at the door startled her. Closing
the door to the wardrobe, she walked to the door. Pulling it open, the dark lord and luna stood
just outside. Luna smiled at her, it unsettled Hermione how she wasn't scared, or if she was,
that she didn't voice it.

“Are you ready, Miss Granger?” Voldemort asked, his hand outstretched for her to take it.

“I just have one question,” She looked into his eyes. “My mask, what does it mean, I’ve
never seen a death eater wear a mask like this one.” She looked down and caught sight of
Luna’s mask. It was a bog-standard mask. Only top death eaters had different masks, like
Bellatrix. Hermione knew she was far from a high-ranking death eater, she didn't even have a
dark mark.

“All in due time, Miss Granger.” His facial expression gave nothing away, but his tone of
voice made it clear this is not up for discussion right now. He flexed his hand, she took it.
Luna took his other. She closed her door, and they took off down the corridor. They went
down the stairs and through a dark hall.

They reached a room she’d never seen before, the doors were closed.

“Masks on.” Voldemort instructed. Both girls placed their masks on their faces. Hermione
noted that a sticking charm kept it from falling from their faces.

Voldemort whispered a spell, the doors slowly began to open.

Masks on, hand firmly clasped in the dark lords, they entered the large room. The mask gave
her confidence, she squared her shoulders, head held high and surveyed the room. Every
death eater was in attendance, they filled the room in a semi-circle, thousands of eyes were
on the three of them. Voldemort stopped in the middle of the room, everyone bowed to him,
letting go of both girls' hands, he directed Hermione to the side. A hand gripped hers
delicately before letting go. The small touch let her know that it was Narcissa she was stood
next to.

Voldemort made a speech to welcome her into the death eaters. Two masked death eaters
stood behind him, one she knew was Bellatrix because of her mask, the other she couldn’t
quite place, their mask was different to the other death eaters, they looked familiar, but her
brain wouldn't quite piece it together. Luna got to her knees, arm outstretched. Voldemort
took it by the wrist, his wand pointed to her forearm.

The ceremony began with what sounded like an unbreakable vow, multiple different
questions, but mostly of her loyalty, would she be loyal to him forever, would she follow him
into battle, does she doubt his capabilities. Yes, my lord, no, my lord. Once the questions had
been asked and answered, a black tendril wisped around both of their wrists before
disappearing.

Voldemort dug his wand deeper into the skin of Luna’s forearm, the tip a bright green. He
began speaking the incantation. It couldn't be heard. Luna’s screams ricochetted off the walls,
even through her mask they pierced Hermione’s ears. Hermione made to move to her, but
Narcissa held her back firmly by the wrist. She could do nothing but watch, tears pricked the
corners of her eyes, pressing her lips tightly together so her sob wouldn't escape.

Her eyes were glued to Luna’s screaming form, she felt helpless. All she wanted to do was go
to her, to rip the wand from Voldemort’s hand and aim it at him. What was only minutes felt
like hours until Luna’s screams faded to broken whimpers.

“You are now one of my followers, we welcome you, Miss Lovegood.” Voldemort said,
helping luna get to her feet.

“We welcome you, Miss Lovegood.” Was chorused from the death eaters. All bowing to
Luna. Hermione followed suit, bowing with the rest of them. Her knees felt weak, she wanted
to vomit. She looked up, catching Voldemort’s eye. He nodded, as if he knew what she was
asking. She ran to Luna’s side, one arm wrapped around her waist, holding her up.
“Take her to her room, let her rest.” Hermione nodded, without a glance to anyone, she
slowly walked Luna back to her room. She lay her down on her bed, taking off her shoes,
robes and mask, settling behind her so that Luna was between her legs, head on her lap.

“I would do it all again for you, Hermione.” Luna’s voice was hoarse, coming out in broken
fragments. “I would save you all over again, if it meant we were together. Safe.” Hermione
shushed her, stroking the soft blonde curls on her head.

“Just sleep, I will be here when you wake up.” Luna hummed, a broken smile on her lips
before she nestled herself deeper into Hermione's body. After a few seconds her breathing
evened out. She was asleep.

Hermione let her tears fall, she cried until there was nothing left. Cried until she felt her heart
crack. Cried until she fell asleep, one hand gripping Luna’s. The other, two fingers on the
sleeping witch's neck, making sure she had a steady pulse.

Draco

Everyone waited for the arrival of the dark lord in silence, not a whisper could be heard.
Loony Lovegood would get her dark mark today, yet Draco could only think about how it
would affect Granger. Would she cry? Scream? Cause a scene?

Was there anything he could do for her?

Internally he scoffed to himself. As if she would want any help he offered. It was one of the
reasons he told the dark lord not to divulge to Granger who it was that suggested she be
rescued from the order.

The doors to the ceremony room creaked open. The silence was suffocating, as if everyone in
attendance was holding their breath. Even aunt Bella knew to be silent. Today was not a day
for her theatrics. Everyone bowed to the dark lord as he made his way to the centre of the
room.

Draco’s bow was stuttered as he caught sight of Granger’s Mask.

Fire.

As if she wore Feindfire on her face. He had never seen a mask like it. Not even his was
designed anything like that. For him, his mask had recently changed from the usual silver to
white, with intricate black spirals. A mask made for a right-hand man. He was the only death
eater with a white mask. To show that he was superior to the others. Bella had a red mask to
show that she was a killer. One of the best.

But Granger’s mask made little sense to him. Why fire? Did it have some sort of
significance? If it did, why was he not informed? Why was the dark lord keeping secrets from
him? He would have to find out.
The only thing that came to mind was the fact that she had set the dark lord on fire. Maybe it
was some form of punishment. It didn't look like a punishment. Maybe it was something to
do with the power she held.

Draco didn't know anything about what power she possessed, what made her so powerful or
why the dark lord jumped at the opportunity to save her, to train her and make her one of his
own. That information was never given or spoken about to him. He was in the dark and he
hated it.

He watched as she stood next to his mother, watched as his mother reassuringly squeezed her
hand, then made his was to his assigned position behind the dark lord.

The ceremony began, his chest tightened, remembering when he was sixteen, on his knees
receiving the same mark. His forearm burned at the memory, a pseudo pain. Throat tightening
as Lovegood’s screams echoed in his ears. But he held strong, keeping his composure. No
weakness can be shown, not in a room full of people who would exploit it to take his
position.

A small movement caught his eye, distracting him for a moment. His mother held Granger by
the wrist, forcing her to stay in place. He could tell from her eyes she was crying, pain
evident in them. She cared for Lovegood, enough to attempt to run to her during an important
initiation.

So, there was still some the old Granger left in her, he thought. Still fiercely loyal to the ones
she cared about.

Lovegood’s screams had stopped. The room now silent. Granger was at her side, walking her
out the room. Her shoulder brushed his elbow, but she didn't seem to notice, all her attention
on the weeping witch in her arms. Draco turned, watching her leave, he wanted to offer her a
hand but knew it wouldn't be appreciated.

“I want to see you in my office in an hour Draco.” The dark lords voice pulled him out of his
thoughts. He turned to face him, head bowing in respect.

“Yes, my lord.” The dark lord swept from the room, robes swishing behind him.

“Drink?” Theo asked, when did he get there?

“Multiple.” Draco stated. Both men left the ceremony room, heading towards Draco’s
bedroom for a much-needed glass of firewhiskey.

As they climbed the stairs, a question burned in Draco's mind.

“Theo?” He asked in a bored tone, so to not make Theo think this was important to him.
“How did you get Granger to like you?” Theo looked at him sharply, clearly trying to read
Draco. Impossible. His occlumency was strong.

“Why?” Theo questioned.

“Well, she seems unapproachable, and you are an ass.” The lie came easily to him, not that
Theo wasn't an ass – because he was – but he wouldn't reveal his true intentions with the
question. True intentions being, a part of him wanted Granger to like him, or at least have a
conversation with him that didn't include them arguing or maliciously insulting each other.
He wasn't an idiot, he knew it would take time, but he would also like to know where or how
he should go about it.

Theo looked at him curiously for a few more seconds before sighing.

“I’m not quite sure myself, I told you that I snook into her room, but that didn't go to plan.”

“You know, you still haven't told me what happened in the room, only that she slept in yours
for the night.”

“That is a secret between best friends.”

“How can you already be best friends, she's barely been here a week. And anyway, I thought
I was your best friend.”

“Are you jealous Malfoy, because there's really no reason to be, you are my best friend, but I
can have more than one.” Draco scoffed at the insinuation that he would be jealous over
something so silly.

“Just answer the question Nott.” Theo laughed but continued.

“We just talked.”

“Talked?”

“Yes, talked. You know with words.”

“Sarcastic bastard.” Draco muttered under his breath, but loud enough for Theo to hear it.

“We talked, got to know each other a little. I think she just needed someone, and I was the
first person she saw, the first person in a long time to be kind to her, besides Lovegood and
Longbottom. May his soul rest in peace.”

A part of him wished that he had the balls to be the first person to go to her. The first face she
saw as a welcome to the manor. But no, he was convinced she would hex him on sight.

“And Pansy? How did she manage it?” He asked incredulously, Parkinson didn't make
friends easily, she was a bitch to put it bluntly.

“Pansy was nice to her.” Was all Theo said. That confunded Draco even more, Pansy was not
nice to just anyone.

“Nice?”

“Yes, Malfoy, nice. She can be nice, they actually got along really well.”
“Okay, I'm done with this conversation now.” And he really was, all that he got was, be nice
and talk to Granger. Two things Granger would not hastily accept from him.

They reached his bedroom door, he pushed it open, going to the drinks cart, he poured them a
large amount of firewhiskey each. Both men went to his sitting area, sipping their drinks.

Maybe he could try, if she shot him down then she shot him down. He’s not expecting them
to go flying brooms together anytime soon.

His mind was set, the next time he saw her, her would simply say hello.

Yes, hello. That would be enough, enough to show her that he could be nice. Enough to show
her that her presence in the manor did not bother him. Enough to show her that he wasn't the
same kid he was in Hogwarts, enough to show her that they could get along, enough to show
her that he wouldn't be cold towards her anymore.

Was it really enough?

End Notes

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