commyounity

Building a Community Around Your Best Life

 All Rights Reserved

This book or any of its parts is not

to be distributed, copied, recorded
or forwarded without express
permission from the author.

COMMYOUNITY SALEM KING | 02

 -
Introduction 04

01
Where to Start
Start with who your are 07
The Five factors 09
Before you start, stop 17

02
How to Continue
It’s okay to not be a guru 20
Stop and ask why 23
This is not a drill 25

03
Don’t expect it to be easy 28

How to Build
Who are you here for? 32
What are the problems? 36
Find your small corner 39
Communicate like a human 40
Prepare for growth 42
Community is built on trust 44
Conclusion 48
- Introduction
How it all started
In January 2019, I got a crazy idea to create 30 videos in
30 days. Before then, I already made videos but only
posted them to my stories where they would disappear
after 24 hours—it was safe and non-committal. At the
time when I made this decision, I had no idea it would
come to change my entire life in less than a month.

All I wanted was a I was not me anymore.

challenge and to This growth surprised
(hopefully) get my 1,500 me. A lot. The growth
followers to maybe 2,000. didn’t stop so I didn’t
At the end of January have the luxury of
after 21 videos and standing on the sidelines
hundreds, maybe to revel and bask in this
thousands of comments, accidental influencer
shares and interactions, status.
my account had grown
from 1,500 to 5,000 in 30 Or did I?
days.

COMMYOUNITY SALEM KING | 04

-

More people were listening to me, applying my teaching

and taking my words very seriously. I had to get
comfortable with it quickly and take responsibility for what
my life had now become. So I started to study, research
and take classes about content creation. That was when I
realized that there were fancy names for some of the
stuff that I practiced with zero knowledge that they were
industry strategies.

A strong community was about to form around me and I

had to make sure that I was building it around the best
version of myself, constantly learning, constantly serving,
and constantly becoming while at it.

This short book is a documentation of my learnings on

the journey. Let me show you how to build a community
around your best life.

COMMYOUNITY SALEM KING | 05

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-

Start with who you are

One of the most crippling fears that a creator
experiences is a fear of starting that comes from a
lack of clarity about who you are or just plain
difficulty with understanding your unique value.

you

You might be in a place where you know about

your strengths, but when it comes down to it, you
see how other people are able to articulate what
they do and what makes them unique in very clear
words and short sentences, and it’s intimidating for
you, because you fear that you may never be like
them.

COMMYOUNITY SALEM KING | 07

 In this case...

It would be easy for someone like me to say

“you just need to be aware of your value.”

But that would just leave you asking

“Salem, but how? I am aware but I don’t
know how to communicate it to others
without sounding like I don’t know what
I’m doing.”

So let’s take a step back and establish a fact

Every human being has a unique combination of five

factors. No two people in the world have the same
combination of these factors: Education, Exposure,
Interests, Expertise and Experience.

COMMYOUNITY SALEM KING | 08

 Experience
Education Expertise

Exposure you Interests

The Five Factors

You might have the same education as someone
or the same interests but you can’t have the exact
same combination of all five with any other person
in the world, not even your twin.

Let’s break each one down...

COMMYOUNITY SALEM KING | 09

Education
This involves every piece of information you’ve
consumed directly or indirectly that has improved
and increased the extent of your knowledge—
anything that has enlightened you in any way.

Exposure
What are the conditions you have been exposed
to by reason of where you live, where you grew up
or other factors such as what your parents did for
a living? Did you travel a lot? What kind of friends
do you hang around? These and more make up
your exposure. Education is a more internal factor.
Exposure is more external—the factors you had no
control over, that now inform your worldview.

Expertise
this involves your skill or knowledge in a particular
field that you could get paid for or have gotten
paid for in the past.

COMMYOUNITY SALEM KING | 10

Interests
This is self explanatory. What are you passionate
about? Normally people think this has to be
something special like ballet, music production or
gardening, but a simple pointer question you can
ask is “what could I talk about for one hour without
preparation?” That’s a strong hint.

Experiences
This is the game changer because experiences
are so unique. Two people could watch the same
movie and come out of the cinema with two
different accounts of what they just watched. It’s
the same with life. Your experiences are unique!

How was Confusing at first,

your movie? then it clicked!

COMMYOUNITY SALEM KING | 11

 The combination of all these
factors is unique for each human
being. No two people have the
same combination. So when I tell
you that you’re one-of-a-kind,
I’m not just sweet talking you. You
actually are one-of-a-kind.

So if you’re wondering

... where to start or you just feel

like you’re not interesting enough
and no one would gather around
for whatever you have to say,
think again. But don’t stop there.

COMMYOUNITY SALEM KING | 12

Grab a piece of paper.
Or your notes app. Make a long list of these
ordinary things and ask yourself questions related
to these five factors:

- What’s my education like? What have I learned

in life?

- What have I been exposed to?

- What interests do I have? What am I passionate

-
about? What keeps me up at night? What
change do I want to see in the world? No matter
how seemingly little.

-
- And then move to expertise. What do people
pay me for? What have I ever in my life been
paid one dollar for? Does it point to something? I
bet it does.

-
- And finally: What are my experiences? Make a
long list: good days, bad days, interesting events,
all of them. Relive them.

At this point you honestly can’t tell me you’re not

the most interesting person on the planet.

COMMYOUNITY SALEM KING | 13

I thought I was a boring person. That’s what I told
myself for many years. Content creation opened my
eyes to the fact that you don’t know how really
interesting you are until you decide to make a story
out of everything. I read a quote that said:

Great stories
happen to those
who can tell them. "
So if you have had interesting experiences, you have
interesting stories.

COMMYOUNITY SALEM KING | 14

-

Why you should start

with who you are.

Start you,
Here again

What choice do you have? Would you start with

someone else? You need to start with what you
have and to be honest, you are all you have. The
other choice is to wait till you feel like you’re up to
it. And waiting for inspiration hardly ever results
in world changing steps. Clarity will come on the
road. You will learn about yourself and surprise
yourself in the process.

COMMYOUNITY SALEM KING | 15

-

This is really important, so I thought to mention it

again, in bigger text for dramatic effect:

Clarity will come

on the road.
Not in your planner or journal. Definitely not in that
corner where you're waiting for inspiration, or for
the shiny new equipment. Clarity comes by doing.
BY DOING.

COMMYOUNITY SALEM KING | 16

 -

Before you
start, stop.
Whenever I get a question along the lines of
“Salem I want to build an online community,” the
first question I ask is “do you belong to any
community at the moment?”

If you do not belong in any community that isn’t

built by you, my advice for you if you’re looking
to start one is to not. Join one first and focus on
creating connections and seeking ways to
contribute in your own way.

Be the most resourceful person. It’s okay to be

passionate but you need to be contributing.
Before you build a community, join one or
several and contribute generously. Your
community will form around impact, not just
passion and good intentions.

COMMYOUNITY SALEM KING | 17

 -

You don’t know how really

interesting you are until
you decide to make a story
out of everything.

-
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-

It’s okay to not be a guru.

There are too many experts, coaches and gurus
on Instagram. Don’t be in a hurry to call yourself
one. Once you call yourself a guru/expert you’re
putting yourself on a pedestal—one that you
have to wake up everyday and try to live up to.

Be honest with yourself about the stage that you

are in and do not be ashamed about it. At every
stage, there’s someone who needs what you
have. If you’re 20 years old for instance, chances
are people will be more comfortable interacting
with you when they can relate to your story and
your struggles rather than when you present
yourself as this person who has arrived.

COMMYOUNITY SALEM KING | 20

 the level you
say you're at

you

the level
you're really
at
the mountain you'd
have to climb
everyday to prove
yourself

COMMYOUNITY SALEM KING | 21

-

Here's the thing...

People root for the underdog—that person who
came up from nothing, documented their
struggles, and experiences and carried their
audience along the journey. It’s easy for them to
see themselves in you. Don’t rob them of that by
picking up a title too early.

In your early stages, leave the titles to your

audience. Let them call you names: thought
leader, teacher, expert, our President etc. But
you? You just be you. Invest in yourself,
document your learnings, avoid subjects that
aren’t your strongest points.

You should not jump on any and every trend. I’ll

show you a way to decide what to focus on in
the next section.

COMMYOUNITY SALEM KING | 22

Stop and ask why
Simon Sinek, renowned motivational speaker & author
has a book titled “Start With Why” and throughout the
book he echoes the message:

People don’t buy

what you do, they
buy why you do it.
This sounds counterintuitive. But then it makes you
want to stop and ask. What does “why” mean in this
context and why is it so important? Your why is your
reason for doing something: a goal or purpose that
gives your effort a deeper meaning & makes
everything else secondary. So it’s a purpose, a cause,
an overriding belief, the reason for being. No deep
meaning. It just is what it is.

COMMYOUNITY SALEM KINIGI | 23

 So ask yourself: What’s your why?
Why do you want to build a
community? What’s the real
reason? What’s the end you see
that would make all the effort in
the present worth it? What’s your
why?

Do this at every stage of your

journey. What is the future you
envision? What’s the world you
want to live in look like? Talk
about it a lot through your
channels. A common why is a
strong uniting factor.

When you understand your why

and are vocal about it, it’s easy
for people who have similar goals
and visions to identify and align,
without even having to interact
directly with you. So always stop
and ask why? And let that be
your compass.

COMMYOUNITY SALEM KING | 24

-

This is not a drill

Consider psychologist Abraham Maslow’s hierarchy of
needs. This cool chap devised a hierarchy of human
needs arranging them according to their importance
to our survival.

First on his list are Physiological

needs: oxygen, food and water
—needs necessary to maintain
life. The second is Safety
needs: health and security.
Guess what the third on the list
is. Community and Belonging:
a need often met by friends, Abraham Maslow
family and romantic partners. (cool chap)

Social media in recent times has become a safe

space for most people. We are constantly looking for
a story to latch onto, a post from someone we admire
to help us know we are not crazy.

COMMYOUNITY SALEM KING | 25

 5

4
community &
3
belonging
2

MASLOW'S HIERARCHY OF NEEDS

COMMYOUNITY SALEM KING | 26

-

Maslow argued that the failure to have needs

met at various stages of the hierarchy could lead
to illness, particularly psychiatric illness or mental
health issues. Individuals who do not feel love or
belonging may experience depression or anxiety.

Community is a survival need.

Having a community is a blessing.

Leading one is a privilege.

Having access to the hearts and minds of a

group of people is a great responsibility. Don’t
take it for granted.

COMMYOUNITY SALEM KING | 27

 -

Don't expect
it to be easy
Building a community around your best life is
not going to be a walk in the park. If it was,
everyone would be doing just that.

First it will take a lot of showing up, with a side of

trial and error to gain clarity on what your best
life is or should be, and then you’ll go through a
process of bringing interested people on the
journey.

building a
community
≠ walk in
the park

You still can’t stop there, you need to keep these

people on the journey.

COMMYOUNITY SALEM KING | 28

-

Though it won’t be rainbows and roses, the

rewards are worth it and you definitely get better,
stronger and wiser with time.

As long as you start with who you are, remain

authentic, stay true to your why through seasons
of evolution and constantly carry the heart of a
servant, you can move mountains.

The title of this book says nothing about quick

fixes or instant results. The first word in the
subtitle says “Building.” Building anything that will
stand the test of time involves setting a proper
foundation and you bet we’re not gonna skip
that.

COMMYOUNITY SALEM KING | 29

 -

Community is a survival
need. Having a community
is a blessing. Leading one
is a privilege. Don't take it
for granted.
-
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 -

Who are you here for?

When we ask the question of purpose or try to
dig into the meaning of our lives as individuals,
the first question we often ask is “what am I on
earth for?” Or “what am I supposed to do with
my life?” And too often, our thoughts lean
toward professions and titles.

Though there’s nothing wrong with those

questions, here’s a better question to begin
asking: “Who am I here for?” This is important
because it takes the pressure and focus off
you to something bigger than you.

The best part is, though the question reveals a

purpose greater than you, your desired titles
or expertise, it’s also not overwhelming
because it comes down to the individual—the
one person you are best equipped to reach
out to based on your past experiences, current
circumstances and your future hopes and
dreams.

COMMYOUNITY SALEM KING | 32

-

So ask yourself “who am I here for? Who do I

want to attract?” This is important because
you’re not for everyone and not everyone is for
you. In content strategy, the fancy way to say
this is identifying your ICP (ideal customer
profile). Don’t overthink it. Let’s simplify it.

Picture every time you step into a wedding party

or a church service, you look around for a few
seconds to figure out where you want to sit. A lot
of times you make that decision based on the
kind of people you want to be around or don’t
want to be around. It’s a very easy decision. You
do it without even thinking.

COMMYOUNITY SALEM KING | 33

-

Now think about your

social media and your
plans for community like
this too: who do I want to
hang out with? Who do I
want to help? Be very
specific in your description
of who they are.

Don’t say something like “young men in Nigeria.”

That's too vague. Which young men? Where do
they live? How old are they? Do they speak English
or Yoruba? Be very specific. The more specific, the
better.

Many people find this exercise unnecessary

because they feel that it’s limiting—they want to be
able to attract everyone. You’re not limiting
yourself, you’re defining yourself.

COMMYOUNITY SALEM KING | 34

Seth Godin says...

“If you need to water down your story to

appeal to everyone, it will appeal to no one.
The most effective stories match the world
view of a tiny audience—and then that tiny
audience spreads the story.”

Determine who it is you are here for before you begin

to take steps toward building a community. This is
why it’s important to join a community first and learn
the ropes of creating and maintaining quality
connections over time. That’s how you’ll know who you
really want to serve.

COMMYOUNITY SALEM KING | 35

 -

What are the

problems?
A community builder is a problem solver. But
don’t let that get you scared. For a second, let’s
zoom out: forget about yourself and focus on
this group of people you’ve decided to serve
and ask “what are their problems and
frustrations? What are they worried about when
they wake up in the morning? What are the
challenges that would keep someone in their
shoes up at night?”

Make a long list of these problems. Now, zoom

back in. Based on your knowledge of yourself
(your education, exposure, interests, expertise
and experiences), which of the problems are
you best equipped to offer solutions for?

Again, don’t let the responsibility of providing

solutions scare you.

COMMYOUNITY SALEM KING | 36

-

Solutions to problems do not always have to come in the

form of a remedy. You won’t always have direct or
permanent solutions and that’s normal. But don’t let that
stop you. Solutions can come in three forms:

1. A remedy
a direct straight-to-the-point linear solution.

2. Empathy
It normally goes a long way when you make people feel
heard and understood, even where you don’t have direct
solutions. To do this well, you have to be intentional about
listening. You have to be more invested in seeking to
understand than your need to be understood or liked.

A lot of times when people ask a question, they think they

want an answer but what they’re really doing is expressing
a pain that they want balm for. You will miss this if you’re
just waiting to offer a perfect reply or answer.

COMMYOUNITY SALEM KING | 37

-
3. Community

I started to understand the power of community one time

when I put up a post and asked in the caption “what’s
bothering you?” and at the time I didn’t fully understand
what I just explained you so I put up that post with a plan
to offer as many solutions as possible once people
started to comment.

A few minutes later, seeing the comments I got

overwhelmed and started to just regret like “God who sent
me? What was I thinking? I can’t help these people.” Now
fast forward another couple minutes, people started to
reply to each other in the comment section, and their
replies were so much better and richer than anything I
could have offered.

That’s when I realised that though it was my community, it

wasn’t about me. It didn’t revolve around me. I was a
catalyst and in that moment, that was enough.I hope
you’re a little more confident in your abilities as a problem
solver now.

COMMYOUNITY SALEM KING | 38

 -

Find your small corner

One of the reasons young people struggle to find
fulfillment is the fact that we have an overriding
desire to do “big” things. More often than not,
fulfillment will come from finding a small corner
where you can make a difference and then making
a hell of a difference.

Now you might say “Salem what do you mean

‘small corner?’ I have big dreams. I intend to take
the world!” That’s noble but here’s what I mean.
Picture this: every smartphone has a tiny opening
somewhere at the bottom. You hardly ever notice it
unless you’re the owner.

It gets almost no attention until you need to charge

the phone. It’s a really small corner, perhaps 1% of
the whole phone, but you know what? If that tiny
spot ever goes bad, you have no phone. Everything
fancy about the phone becomes nothing. It’s
literally useless if you can’t charge it. Finding your
small corner is about identifying a specific pain
point where you can be balm. I made a video
about this some time last year.

Small Corner
- Communicate
like a human

In my classes, I call this Here’s a basic

topic “How to communication
communicate in ways framework that I learned
people want to listen to.” from master
You know, just the way you communicator Andy
have a unique Stanley. He doesn’t put it
combination of those exactly this way but I’ve
factors we talked about personalized it so that it’s
earlier (education, easy for me to remember,
exposure, interests, apply and teach. I call it
expertise and experience), the REMP Framework.
every individual has a
unique combination too. Andy teaches this for
This is why it’s important to public speaking. I apply it
identify specifically who to content creation and
you’re trying to reach out storytelling.
to, and then be deliberate
about how you decide to
communicate your value
to them.

COMMYOUNITY SALEM KING | 40

-

R is for Relatable, E is for easily applicable, M is for

Memorable, P is for portable. To communicate your value
or offers in a way that get the attention of the people you
want to attract, it has to be:

see themselves in your story.

REMP
1. Relatable: this simply means people need to be able to

2. Easily applicable: people will only remember what they

apply. It’s why we can’t remember half the stuff we
learned in secondary school. We didn’t get to apply. So
present your ideas in a ways that is easy to understand &
easy to apply.

3. Memorable: You want to create content that people

remember the next time they’re in a real life situation
related to what you’ve talked about. People will be able to
apply what they remember. this goes hand-in-hand with
easily applicable.

4. Portable: if it can be shorter, please make it shorter.

Don’t say in 5 paragraphs what you could say in 3. If
there’s any part of your content that if you took out, the
general idea would be unaffected, take it out. Keep it short
and simple.

COMMYOUNITY SALEM KING | 41

-

Prepare
for Growth
If you apply everything we’ve talked
about so far, over time, you will
begin to see growth. Growth is
cumulative so you need to prepare
for it.

You can only be modest in the early

stages. People always root for the
underdog, but when you start to
evolve upwards and away from
obscurity, you are no longer the
underdog—You are a leader. Own it.

If you have followers, then you’re

leading them somewhere. Do not
allow your insecurities get in the
way of your power.

COMMYOUNITY SALEM KING | 42

Remember, you are a catalyst.
Allow your community form. Take
strategic steps to bring your
community together in a more
organized manner.

At this point you have to move from

the person who is surprised by
growth to a leader who is actively
taking responsibility for not just the
growth but the maintenance of their
community.

Do the hard things. Organize a

class. Start a mailing list.
Collaborate with other community
leaders. Fill your own shoes.

COMMYOUNITY SALEM KING | 43

 -

Community is built on trust

I came back to edit this part of the book the night
before it would be shipped just to say that as I write
this, about 300 people have preordered this ebook,
including you.

You came across a piece of content that talked about

this book and the author claimed it would teach you
how to build a community around your best life and
you said to yourself “okay I trust this guy, I haven’t seen
the book yet but I’ll give him my money.” That's
audacious if you ask me.

But maybe it’s not. Maybe it’s because you trust me, or
something about me and it was an easy decision for
you to make. In the near future, you want your
community members to be this confident in your
ability to deliver because they know that your brand
will keep its promise.

I strongly believe that branding is more about trust

than it is about look and feel. To create trust, you have
to consistently keep your promise over time. Give, give
and give before you ask.

COMMYOUNITY SALEM KING | 44

Cater to the head and heart
Do not think about your followers as the number in
your bio. No! It’s the number of individuals who are
invested in your story and are tied to your purpose
—tied to your decision to show up and be of value
every day. Do not get so addicted to the idea of
numbers that you forget that each number is a
unique human being.

Continue with who you are

The quality of your content will attract people but
it’s your humanity and personality that makes
them stay. This does not mean that you should
never change and hold yourself back from
evolving. I’m suggesting that you stay human. Do
not take the “person” out of the personal brand. In
the seasons of evolution, stay guided by your why.
Carry your audience along your journey.

COMMYOUNITY SALEM KING | 45

 Cater to the Head and Heart

COMMYOUNITY SALEM KING | 46

 -

The quality of your

content will attract people,
but it's your humanity and
personality that makes
them stay.
-
 - Conclusion

Your best life is what you decide it is. Build a

community around your strengths, not what you
think is popular. It’s small deposits of time over a
period of time. Cater to the people you’re sent
to, not the group with the most population.

If you’re reading this, you made it to the end! I'm

a big fan of yours and shhh don't tell the others,
but you're the reason I wrote this book, so I'd love
to know how you feel now.

Take a screenshot of the next page, fill it in and

share it on your stories. Don't forget to tag me
so I'd see it!

COMMYOUNITY SALEM KING | 48

Phew,
I just finished reading commyounity
by and I feel

Hey, I think you'd love this book!

@
 @salemkinging

My name is Salem King and I'm a community

builder. I'm on a mission to help creators find
clarity and healthy community. Through the
Booster Academy, I've trained over 600
creators and we don't plan to stop anytime
soon! I'm so glad to have in this
commyounity.
Editing & Design
ALMA ASINOBI