Micro-Counseling Skills Reflection

Marissa Licea

Department of Higher Education and Student Affairs

HESA 562: Helping Skills for Student Affairs Professionals

Dr. Kelly Wesener Michael

October 9, 2023
Introduction

As a Graduate Hall Director, I feel that I am constantly working and getting feedback on how to

better follow-up with students. I think something I personally try to always do is remind the

students I am there to help them in whatever the situation may be. Sometimes students are

upset at the situation and take that out on me since I am following up. When conducting follow

ups, it is sometimes hard to not take things personally as I do care about every student I

interact with. As a student affair professional, I thrive to have solid personal relationships with

the students I work with. This is something that I hope reflects in my work.

Strengths

In addition to a strong personal relationship with students, I think approaching a

situation with care is important and making sure students understand the “why”. I will reflect

on my strengths using Nelson-Jones counseling skills that we have discussed and practiced

during class. I show that a relationship needs to be built with the student almost immediately at

(0:11) where I give the student the structure of the meeting. This would also demonstrate the

skill of starting and structing as it happens at the start of the meeting and it is outlining what

the meeting is going to look like. Attention and interest are shown throughout the video as I am

making eye contact with the student, head nodding and giving verbal queues that I am actively

listening. I ask question throughout the video, but specifically at (1:52) when the student stated

classes are going good, I then prompted with a question of balancing leadership role and

academics as a segway to the next topic of holding a leadership role and its importance.

Offering challenges and feedback is reflected at (3:40) when the question of “What are
somethings we can think about when we are not directly wearing our leadership role hat?” This

allowed the student to realize, and think that they now hold a leadership role, and this reflects

all the time and what are some ways to remember this. An important part of this follow-up

(6:08) Summarizing and (6:30) paraphrasing and reflecting feelings was done. I feel this is an

important part, and one of strengths because I let the student know, I heard what they said and

validated their feelings in the situation. The student stated they are no longer friends with the

person they were involved in the physical altercation with, and I let them know that is their

choice and may even be the best. At (6:40) I begin to tie back to the leadership role that the

student holds, and how this may trigger people to have opposing thoughts and begin to

facilitate problem solving when it comes to larger scale feelings we might have. I give

suggestions and offer the student room to disagree with the suggestions. I also then explain

implications that can follow if choices are not thought-out. I then gave resources, and asked for

the student to think about what they need to be better supported in their leadership role

specifically.

Area of Improvement

Although I have highlighted a number of strengths, there are areas in this specific situation that

I did not touch on. This is managing resistance, rehearsing and demonstrating. I think this follow

up just did not allow for a great opportunity to do so. I think that sometimes students are

reluctant to take in the feedback being given, especially by someone who was not involved in

the situation. I would say I sort of demonstrated the behavior I was wanting to see in the

meeting, which is probably why it was a clear cut follow up, but could have been important to

note a specific behavior to do rather than just asking “what else can we do instead?” This way
students know what exactly to try out. This goes the same for rehearsing. I think this follow up

did not necessarily allow me to have the opportunity to do so, nor do I really think about this

skill when conducting follow up that may require changed behavior. Also, this only being 10

minutes did not give me the full opportunity to talk to the student as much as I would have

liked to. I would normally block off 30 minutes to an hour for something like this.

What was Learned

Throughout, I think it is easy to just blame students in any situation. What is important is to

make sure they know they are heard regardless of if they initiated the situation at hand or not.

Students are still figuring out how to handle their emotions and are working on balancing

multiple hats that they wear when on campus. Baxter Magolda talks about building an internal

foundation, where students strengthen their trust in their internal voices, and begin to organize

their choices into commitments, form a philosophy, to help guide their ongoing reactions to

reality (Baxter Magolda 632). Many students, when reacting and responding to things, are very

much in the beginning phase of developing their personal philosophy of how to better respond

to intense situations. In follow ups like the one presented, it is important to come from a place

of care and explain what later could happen if the behavior continues. This way nothing comes

as a surprise to students when and if another situation comes up.

Conclusion

Although follow up with students is not always as easy as it was in this video, I think

following up is an important part of my role. Follow up lets students know that there is

someone who cares about them enough to ask them about how they are feeling about a
situation. This also allows for an opportunity to give the student resources. I do not think that

there is a perfect way to follow up and there is always room for improvement.
 References
Baxter Magolda, M. B. (2009). The activity of meaning making: A holistic perspective on college
student development. Journal of College Student Development, 50(6), 621–639.
https://doi.org/10.1353/csd.0.0106

Nelson-Jones. (2016). Basic counseling skills : a helper’s manual / Richard Nelson-Jones. (Fourth
edition.). SAGE Publications Ltd.