Revision Matrix

Kanav Arora

Perm Number: 7070154

Writing 2

March 15, 2024

 1

WP1

A comment or
question I
received (from The change(s) I made to How this change
WP1 whom/where?) what I initially wrote: impacts my paper:

1)Novachkov, Revised:Changed citation

Hristo, and format to include page
Arnold Baca. numbers and corrected
"Artificial format to: Hristo Novatchkov
Intelligence in Benjamin and Arnold Baca, "Artificial
Sports on the (classmate) and Intelligence in Sports on the Ensures citations are
Example of Instructor Example of Weight properly formatted,
Weight highlighted errors Training," Journal of Sports enhancing the paper's
Training." in footnote and Science & Medicine (2018): credibility.
Journal of citation formatting 28-31.
Sports Science
This is just one example.
& Medicine,
There are multiple other such
2018.
changes in the footnote
citations.

2)Going into Modified paragraph on

more detail on Reflection inspired Revised:Going into more methodologies to make
how both the by "Reflective detail into the the scope of analysis
articles differ in writing and the better written, enriching
methodologies and
the method of revision process" the comparison and
conventions of both
analysis. The by Giles providing a more
disciplines showcases their
first paper comprehensive
 2

illustrates unique approaches. The understanding of each

different field's approach.
AI-centric study utilises
methodologies
advanced tools for data
to present their
findings. The collection and analysis,

study employs leveraging sensors and

advanced AI
machine learning algorithms
tools for data
to scrutinise athlete
collection and
analysis, performance on weight

utilising sensors machines. This approach not

and machine
only emphasises numerical
learning
data and graphical
algorithms to
scrutinise athlete representations to reveal
performance on
training patterns but also
weight
highlights AI's capability for
machines. This
AI-centric real-time, personalised

approach feedback. Contrastingly, the

emphasises
Sports Science paper adopts
numerical data
a traditional route, relying on
and graphical
representations systematic reviews of

to show patterns empirical research to

and efficiencies
understand resistance
in training
training's impact on muscle
regimens,
 3

showcasing AI's hypertrophy. It prioritises

power in
qualitative analysis, drawing
personalising
on peer-reviewed studies to
training through
real-time evaluate evidence

feedback. On the thoroughly. Amid these

other hand, the
methodological differences,
second paper
the conventions of research
relies on
systematic publication and community

reviews of engagement further

empirical
illuminate the distinct paths
research,
taken by AI and Sports
dissecting
various Science. AI's rapid iteration
resistance
and open-source sharing
training impacts
culture enable a dynamic,
on muscle
hypertrophy fast-paced exchange of

through a insights, often disseminated

compilation of
through digital platforms that
peer-reviewed
prioritise speed and
studies. This
method accessibility. In contrast,

emphasises Sports Science's adherence to

qualitative
peer-reviewed processes and
analysis over
structured debates, typically
quantitative,
 4

with a focus on shared in journals and

evaluating
conferences, underscores a
evidence from
commitment to rigorous
existing
literature rather scrutiny and comprehensive

than generating discourse. This approach not

new data
only fosters a deeper
through
understanding but also
technological
means. The ensures that findings

distinct translate into practical

approaches
applications, extending its
highlight a
impact beyond academia to
divide between
AI's reliance on practitioners and athletes.
direct,
These contrasting
data-driven
conventions in how
insights
illustrated knowledge is generated,

through graphs analysed, and shared reveal

and numbers for
the underlying ethos of AI
clarity, and
and Sports Science,
sports science's
preference for a underscoring their unique

narrative contributions to the evolving

synthesis of
landscape of fitness and
researched data
training.
to formulate
 5

evidence-based
training
principles. This
not only
underlines the
unique
analytical lenses
of each study
but also the
broader
differences in
evidence
presentation and
analysis between
disciplines
focusing on
technological
innovation and
those grounded
in empirical
research
traditions. This
contrast reflects
the core essence
of their
disciplines: AI
delves into the
specifics of
 6

computational
analysis and
visual data
interpretation,
while Sports
Science draws
on a rich
heritage of
validated
research and
theoretical
frameworks.
Such differences
not only
highlight the
unique
approaches but
also demonstrate
the diverse
landscapes of AI
and Sports
Science as
distinct
disciplines.
 7

3)Improved
transitions
Makes the essay flow
between Inspired by class Final :Inserted a new
more smoothly, clarifying
paragraphs. discussion and transition like "Transitioning
the progression of ideas
There were no Hector's(classmate from traditional training to
and enhancing
proper advice) AI, we see..."
readability.
transitions
before.

4)Therefore ,as Therefore , In the pursuit of

we jump into advancing physical fitness
this blended methodologies, this paper
approach, we contrasts two principally
find two very divergent methods: the
distinct ways of customization of exercise
looking at regimens through artificial
exercise and intelligence (AI) technology,
getting fit. AI is Instructor's advice and the application of sports Refined thesis to frame it

all about using during an science principles, which better and enhance intro

technology to appointment underscore established, of the paper.

get personal holistic practices for

with our optimising bodily functions.
workouts, while Through this comparative
Sports Science analysis, the study aims to
is about the assess the relative
tried-and-true effectiveness of each
methods that approach, explore their
focus on how potential for integration, and
 8

our bodies work elucidate their cumulative

as a whole. implications for enhancing
overall physical health.

Shriaan
Added specific details and a
(classmate)
5)Added direct citation from the
suggested in the Strengthens arguments
evidence in "Maximising Muscle
reader response with concrete evidence.
paragraph 2 Hypertrophy" study to
workshop to add
support claims.
direct evidence

Subtly shifts tone to a

6)Initial : "have Final : "have intertwined in a
more scholarly and
come together in Self-reflection remarkable fashion"
formal tone without
an exciting way"
altering the message .

7)Maintained Minimal changes to style and

writing style and structure as it was deemed
structure mainly well-organised and easy to
The changes in structure
except a few follow by the
Peer feedback and
like the example made the
lines within instructor.Made few changes
instructor's
transition from one
paragraphs like in organisation :Transitioning
comments
paragraph to another
:On the other from traditional training to
suggested
much better.
hand, AI, we see both aim for
structure was fine
"Maximising muscle growth through
Muscle unique methods: AI
Hypertrophy: A customises with technology,
Systematic whereas sports science builds
 9

Review of on evidence-based practices.

Advanced On the other hand,
Resistance "Maximising Muscle
Training Hypertrophy: A Systematic
Techniques and Review of Advanced
Methods" by Resistance Training
Michał Techniques and Methods" by
Krzysztofik et Michał Krzysztofik et al.,
al., takes a takes a traditional sports
traditional sports science approach to
science understand muscle growth.
approach to The study suggests that
understand effective
muscle growth. hypertrophy-oriented training
This systematic should incorporate a
review evaluates combination of mechanical
the efficacy of tension and metabolic stress,
various achieved through specific
resistance manipulation of training
training variables such as volume,
techniques and intensity, and frequency. The
methods, author notes, "effective
emphasising the hypertrophy-oriented training
importance of should comprise a
scientifically combination of mechanical
sound and tension and metabolic
practically stress," illustrating the
applicable importance of balancing
 10

training these two elements for

regimens for optimal muscle growth. This
maximising systematic review evaluates
muscle the efficacy of various
hypertrophy. resistance training techniques
The study and methods, emphasising
suggests that the importance of
effective scientifically sound and
hypertrophy-orie practically applicable
nted training training regimens for
should maximising muscle
incorporate a hypertrophy. The evidence
combination of presented in this paper
mechanical supports the notion that
tension and higher volumes of resistance
metabolic stress, training, when applied
achieved correctly, can lead to
through specific significant muscle growth,
manipulation of highlighting the critical role
training of evidence-based practices
variables such as in developing effective
volume, training strategies. So, by
intensity, and focusing on evidence-based
frequency. The practices, this approach seeks
evidence to optimise training
presented in this outcomes through structured
paper supports and methodical
the notion that experimentation. The
 11

higher volumes findings not only validate the

of resistance traditional methods of
training, when resistance training but also
applied reinforce the significance of
correctly, can traditional sports science in
lead to the evolving landscape of
significant physical training.
muscle growth,
highlighting the
critical role of
evidence-based
practices in
developing
effective
training
strategies. The
author notes,
"effective
hypertrophy-orie
nted training
should comprise
a combination of
mechanical
tension and
metabolic
stress,"[1]
illustrating the
importance of
 12

balancing these
two elements for
optimal muscle
growth. So, by
focusing on
evidence-based
practices, this
approach seeks
to optimise
training
outcomes
through
structured and
methodical
experimentation.
The findings not
only validate the
traditional
methods of
resistance
training but also
reinforce the
significance of
traditional sports
science in the
evolving
landscape of
physical
 13

training.
Transitioning
from traditional
training to AI,
we see both aim
for muscle
growth through
unique methods:
AI customises
with technology,
whereas sports
science builds
on
evidence-based
practices.
 14

WP2

A comment or
question I
received (from The change(s) I made to How this change
WP2 whom/where?) what I initially wrote impacts my paper

Hector (reader
Updated citation format to Improves academic
8)Footnote and response) and
include page numbers and integrity by having
citation errors Instructor noted
corrected format correct Chicago citations.
errors

Inserted an example of
memes right after explaining
universal conventions:This is
similar to the way the
'Evolution of Man' meme
9)Third
format is used to depict
paragraph on Clarifies and strengthens
progression or change over
memes did not Personal reflection the argument by
time, humorously comparing
have a concrete on structure and providing a concrete
past and present scenarios to
example content flow example, enhancing
highlight technological
explaining the reader understanding
advancements or changes in
convention.
societal norms.Such a format
exemplifies how minimal
text alongside a compelling
visual can succinctly express
complex ideas, making
 15

abstract concepts more

tangible and relatable.

10)Initial Emphasised the

Conclusion :In transformative power of
conclusion, the meme translation and its
journey from implications for knowledge
translating a sharing:In summary, the
detailed process of translating dense
academic article academic research into the
into the universally digestible and
universally engaging format of memes
accessible and showcases the art of
engaging balancing scholarly depth Offers a more impactful

medium of with the inclusivity of conclusion, broadening

memes Personal reflection popular culture. This process the discussion on the

exemplifies the for stronger impact not only demands a rigorous relevance and utility of

intricate understanding of the original academic translations

balance academic content but also a into memes

between creative engagement with

maintaining meme culture’s conventions,
academic ensuring that the insights
integrity and remain both accurate and
embracing the compelling. Through this
widespread innovative approach, we not
appeal of pop only broaden the audience
culture. By for academic research but
leveraging the also underscore the potential
unique for memes to act as a bridge,
 16

strengths of connecting rigorous

each scholarly analysis with the
genre—academi discourse of everyday life.
c articles' depth Consequently, this translation
of research and not only democratises access
analysis and to complex ideas but also
memes' ability illustrates the changing
to convey ideas landscape of knowledge in
succinctly and the digital age, where
engagingly—w academic integrity and
e can bridge the cultural resonance can
gap between coexist, fostering a more
scholarly informed and engaged public
research and discourse.
popular
discourse.

Added text to discuss impact

of readings like "Mad Max:
Fury Road" by Liptak :These
examples provided practical
11)Initial draft Deepens the context and
insights into how different
did not include Shriaan suggested provides evidence-based
forms of media can be
detailed and personal support for the
leveraged to enhance
discussion on reflection arguments, enriching the
understanding and
class sources content
engagement with complex
ideas. They underscored the
importance of adaptability
and creativity in
 17

communication, offering
valuable lessons on
effectively translating
academic concepts into more
accessible formats without
sacrificing depth or accuracy.
This guidance was
instrumental in shaping
strategies that ensured the
memes not only captivated
but also educated the
audience, bridging the gap
between scholarly discourse
and popular culture.

12)Initial Intro : Rewrote the introduction to

In the realm of enhance clarity and
academic engagement:In the academic
discourse, the realm, transforming an
Makes the introduction
transition from article from academic to
more engaging and
an academic non-academic format
concise by reducing
article to a Personal reflection presents a unique challenge
redundancy which sets a
non-academic for improvement that transcends simply
clear framework for the
format presents simplifying the content. This
discussion, improving
a unique task demands a profound
readability.
challenge that understanding of both the
goes beyond original material and the
mere medium for adaptation. In
simplification this instance, the objective
 18

of content. This was to convert an academic

process requires article on Artificial
a deep Intelligence (AI) in fitness
understanding into a series of memes. The
of both the academic piece aimed to
source material enrich the discourse by
and the chosen highlighting how AI and
medium for traditional training methods,
translation. In while distinct, could
this case, the synergistically enhance
task was to fitness regimes. Academic
transform an articles are marked by their
academic article specialised terminology,
on the use of comprehensive research
Artificial analysis, structured
Intelligence arguments, and scientific
(AI) in fitness data presentation, like
into a series of graphs, targeting an audience
memes. The well-versed in academic
academic article research techniques.
aimed to Conversely, the medium of
contribute to the memes follows entirely
discourse by different norms. Renowned
offering for their visual appeal and
insights into humour, memes reach a wide
how AI and audience by simplifying
traditional complex concepts into
methods are relatable and easily digestible
 19

two very bits. Therefore, translating

distinct ways of scholarly insights into
training but can memes posed the challenge
be of how to preserve the
synergistically academic findings' depth and
applied to integrity while making them
enhance fitness engaging and accessible to a
training. Such lay audience. This reflection
articles are aims to examine the detailed
characterised by process of this genre
their use of transformation, focusing on
specialised the necessary shift in
language, language and presentation to
detailed make complex academic
research ideas resonate in the simple,
analysis,structur visual format of memes.
ed
argumentation
and a scientific
way of
representing
information
such as graphs
,catering to an
audience
well-versed in
academic
research and
 20

methodologies.
Contrastingly,
the medium of
memes operates
under a vastly
different set of
conventions.Kn
own for their
visual appeal
and humour,
memes engage
a broad
audience by
breaking
complex ideas
into easily
digestible and
relatable
content. This
genre
translation thus
posed the
question: How
can one
maintain the
integrity and
depth of
academic
 21

findings while
making them
accessible and
engaging to the
casual
observer? This
reflection
therefore aims
to dissect the
intricate process
of this
translation from
the primary to
secondary
genre, focusing
on the shift in
language and
presentation
required to
make complex
and detailed
academic ideas
connect in the
simple and
visual format of
memes.
 22

13)Grammar Corrected grammar and

Instructor pointed Enhances the overall
and spacing spacing errors throughout the
out issues readability.
errors essay.

Expanded discussion on
meme conventions and
provided examples with Strengthens the analysis
14)Elaborate on citations : "Evolution of Man by offering specific
Jiquin's feedback
conventions and Meme," Know Your Meme, examples, making the
in reader workshop
meme examples accessed March 14, 2024, argument more
https://knowyourmeme.com/ convincing and grounded
memes/evolution-of-man-me
me.

Added transitions to connect

sections more
15)Adding clearly:Through addressing
transition these challenges, we pave the Improves the essay's
Self-reflection for
statements way for a conclusion that flow, making it easier for
smoother flow
which did not highlights how memes can readers.
exist previously. serve as a bridge between
complex research and
broader public engagement.
 23

Translation

A comment or
question I
received (from The change(s) I made to How this change
Translation whom/where?) what I initially wrote: impacts my paper:

Initial
Final Change :Meme 1:
meme:Meme 1:
shows the future of
shows the future
AI-driven workout plans
of AI-driven
with traditional
workout plans
bodybuilding methods,
with traditional
presenting a visual
bodybuilding
comparison that highlights Clarifies the intention
methods, Instructor's
the evolving landscape of behind the meme's
presenting a comments
fitness training.This meme design.
visual
was AI generated and the
comparison that
spelling mistakes in the
highlights the
meme are symbolic of the
evolving
mistakes AiI can make when
landscape of
you are completely reliant
fitness training.
on it.