DOYOU FEEL

Festival of New ANGERP

American
received its world
Plays at premiere in the
Louisville, Kentucky on March 9, the Actors Theatre of
The
performance was directed
Maldonado, costunmes
M.I. Dogg, and by
2018,
by Margot New York on MarLoui
Bordelon,
Jessica Pabst, lights with sets
by Isabella by
2lumana
ch 13,svil 2019.
e in CHARACTERS
SOFIA - late 20s

manager was Katiedramaturgy by Jenni

Shade. The cat wasP'asage-White.
Arnulfo
The Byrd, sound by
EVA - early 30s
JON - late 40s
SOFIA follows: production stage HOWIE- early 30s
EVA JORDAN - late 20s
JON, .Tiffany Vil arin SOFIA'S MOTHER - mid-50s
HOWIE MeganGrimesHil
Dennis William
JANIE - any age (may be doubled with SOFIAS MOTHER)
OLD MAN - 130
JORDAN .Amir Wachterman
SOFIA'S MOTHER / JANIE Bjorn DuPaty
OLD MAN..
PRE-RECORDED
Lisa Tejero DONNA -60s
.Jon Hufman MAN'S VoICE - any age
DOYOU
FEELANGER?
Aibel, Artistic
was produced by the
Director, Sarah Stern, ArtisticVineyard Theatre, Douglas SETTING
Managing Director, in New York, New York Director, Suzanne ADpel.
on March 13, 2019. The Most of the stage is a conference room with glass walls. It is attached to
performance was directed by Margot Bordelon, with sets by a phone bank just offstage, and people cross behind the room every so
Jellinek, costumes by Emilio Sosa, lights by Marie Laura often.
musicand sound design by Palmer Hefferan, and Yokoyama, original In the conference room there is one chair that stays empty the whole
design by J. Jared Janas. The wig, hair, and makeup
time. A cardigan hangs over the back of the chair, and a cup of coffee sits
White. The cast was as follows: production stage manager was Adrian on the table in front of it.
SOFIA Towards the very end of the play, bathroom stalls appear onstage.
.Tifany Villarin
EVA
Megan Hill CASTING NOTES
JON.
Greg Keller
HOWIE
..Justin Long Howie should be played by a white actor. Between Jordan and Jon at
JORDAN least one of the roles should be played by a person of color, and between
.UgoChukwu
SOFIA'S MOTHER / JANIE
Eva and Sofia at least one of the roles should be played by a person of
.Jeanne Sakata color.
OLD MAN. Tom Aulino
More generally, this is a play about power, violence, and complicity.
With that in mind re: your casting decisions, please be mindful of not
perpetuating insidious stereotypes, and please be aware of what story
you are telling based on the actors you cast in each role.

PERFORMANCE NOTES
The actors should play against the menace rather than leaning into it,
especially at the top of the play. For example, when Howie says he'd like
to have sex with Sofia, it should sound more like he'd like to grab acoffee
with her than being an aggressive come-on.
 Scene One

(SOFIA'S MOTHER is leaving SOFIA a voice

message.)
For my mnother. SOFIA'S MOTHER. Hi, dear. Just checking in. I know you're
starting your new assignment today, and you must be
very busy, but... I just wanted to say hi and wish you
luck! Not that you need my luck... Irealize that I'm
talking to the person who once taught a broker without
tear ducts how tocry out of his mouth...
(Pause.)
Anyways -Ihope you're okay. I haven't heard from you
since - well, since your father wrote you, so... I just
wanted to see how you're doing.
(Pause.)
And let's see...what else. Oh! Sherry told me about
this beautiful island called Compass Point, with these
gorgeous views, and sea creatures that talk to you and
keep you company as you swim. And so...maybe we can
go together after your job!
(Pause.)
Iknow you must be processing some...complicated
feelings right now, so... Ijust wanted to let you know
that... I'm here if you want to talk. Ilove you my little
spider. Okay - bye bye.
(SOFIA ¿s in the conference room, setting up
atape recorder and some papers. EVA enters,)
EVA, Hi! I'm Eva.
SOFIA. Hi, Eva, Im Sofia.
EVA. You're here totry and help us scream less at people on
the phone?
7
8 DO YOUFEEL ANGER? ANGER? 9
DO YOUFEEL

SOFIA. Yes. I'm an empathy coach. doesn't seem like the best way to
EVA. To be honest, I don't think I need no. That
lessons onempathy. EVA. No, no - should...are you dating anyone?
But everyone else in the office does, so. handle it. Maybe you relevant?
ask why that's
(She laughs.) sOFIA, No,I'm not. Can I
EVA. Okay, well...
You're going to love it here. I know you hear
collection agency' and you think everyone in "debt (Pause.)
must be really mean, but you're right. It's a this office Maybe you want to start
dating someone like, ASAP? I
insular community here, and everyone is s0very small, - Iwas with him for
just broke up with my boyfriend
him the whole time. His
and mean and it's just a really fantastic, outgoing
really ten years, even though I
hated
Hold on - Icould never
mugging me scary
work environment. Someone keeps name was - Marcus? Marco?
when talking, so... I wrote
I'm walking around the office. pay attention to him when he was
it down. Okay...his name was...
(She smiles.)
(Checkinga piece of paper.)
Ilikeyour nails - are they from your hands?
SOFIA. Did you say someone keeps mugging you? Jeffrey.
EVA. I don't think so! Did you say that? (Pause.)
SOFIA. You said that. Weird. Where did I get Marcus from?
EVA. If you say so. Someone keeps mugging me, so it (Pause.)
wouldn't be so crazy for me to say it out loud, but Anyways, Marcus - sorry, blagh - JetYrey was a marine
I'd certainly never dwell on it or claim that's what's biologist, which sounds interesting, but it was really
happening. Someone keeps mugging me. not..
(Pause.) (Taking out a photo.)
You seem lovely. Everyone here's going to hit on you. This is a photo from a trip we took upstate with a few
SOFIA. Oh, well...thank you. friends..he's...
EVA. I'm trying to say that like it's a compliment, but really (Looking at the photo.)
it's a warning, Everyone's going to hit on you, and you Which one is he?
won't get anything done unless you shut it down. And
even if you do shut it down, eventually they'll find a (Looking.)
way around it and then they'll wear you down until you Oh - there he is. There,or there. One of those
two guys
was my Marcus. Shoot! My Jeffrey. It's so weird that
disappear. Ikeep doing that. Idon't even
SOFIA.Wel, if people hit on me, Il just tell them to stop. know any Marcuses,
besides my dad.
EVA. What do you mean? SOFIA. Why did you guys break up?
SOFIA. I'l say, "Please don't hit on me" EVA. Well-first, he started
EVA. (Laughing) No! hundreds of blowjobs from cheating on me - mostly getting
other women - and then
(More frantic.) eventully he ended up murdering...
10 DO YOU FEEL ANGER? DO YOUFEEL ANGER? 11

SOFIA.He ended up murdering?
EVA. Or, no - what's it called when you stab someone to
death?
SOFIA. Murder.
EVA. Okay, so then yeah he ended up murdering! And
even then, I didn't really want to break up with him.
because he was so helpful for the work dynamics.
but I was like - he murdered more than one person.
so..you know the saying.
SOFIA. I'm not sure Ido.
EVA. No?
(As if it's a rhyme.)
"If he murders one It's all in good fun. | If he
slaughters a whole crowd, and you realize you were
sharing a bed witha stranger for ten years just to avoid
a bad work environment..."
(She pauses.)
Huh. What is the ending to that saying? "Just to avoid
a bad work environment..something something
something and serial killers' wives always finish last."
sOFIA. Well -good for you, that you got out of anunhealthy
relationship.
EVA. Thanks, yeah, it's made my life so stressful, because
now I'm serambling to get a new boyfriend ASAP so
that my work-life can return tonormal. Like - this date
Iwent on last night?
(She shakes her head,)
I mean, he wasn't terrible, but he said the phrase, "Egg
is a man's best egg" a lot so, you know, just...not the
perfect fit.
SOFIA. Can we go back to what you said before? About how
someone's mugging you?
EVA.What? Oh no, that's okay, but thanks.
(She smiles.)
EVA.Maybe we can just recap my advice instead: try to date
someone like my dad Marcus - sorry, my boufriend,
Marcus - sorry, my ex-boyfriend Jeffrey, and then
mention that person all the time, but do it really subtly,
and then never break up with him, even if he turns out
to be a murderer, or - sorTy - a "stabber to death."
(She laughs)
Because Iwouldn't want you to end up in danger.
SOFIA. Danger how?
EVA. Like me like how I'm in danger. And, I mean..
Iknow that they keep saying Janie's just in the
bathroom, but..t's been so many days!
(She laughs. SOFIA doesn't know why, but she
laughs t0o. JON enters.)
JON. Eva? Could I have a second with Sofia alone?
EVA. Of course!
(Playfully nodding to JON and sOFIA.)
M'lady. M'sir.
(She giggles and then erits.)
JON. So! All set for today?
SOFIA. Ah - yes! I was planning on checking out some
of those calls, and then - can I just ask - Eva said
something about being mugged in the office?
JON. Do you mean Janie?
SOFIA. Ithink - wasn't that Eva just now?
JON. Oh, Eva! Yes. She's spoken to me about that and I'm
over it. Sorry - all over it. The safety of my employees
is my top priority. Bottom line, over everything else,
Ireally want to pretend that I'm a good guy"
(He laughs, then pauses thoughtfully.)
Isn't the situation with the homeless terrible? Just
awful. They don't have much food but they have toeat
to survive.
SOFIA. Right.
12 13
DO YOUFEEL ANGER? ANGER?
DO YOUFEEL

(She smiles.) or elation, or

fear...
SOFIA. And sodid they explain how this works? Basicall sOFIA. And sadness, horn.
or anger - or
I take your employees through the JON. And hunger,
it's clear they understand training, and once SOFIA. Horn?
the material, Isign the form have sex with someone.
they sent you, we pass it back up to head office, and ION, When you want to
about our feelings is that they're
we're done! SOFIA. Sure. The beauty and each
JON. Okay - so Iimagine it won't take more than a complicated, and they're hard to pin down,
I'm excited to
day or And
two. and every one of them is valid.
SOFIA. It usually takes closer to four or five weeks. unpack it allwith you.
JON,Well, maybe in other offices. Iknow that you're used (Ofhis look.)
to
intense clients - your ofice told me about the doctors Look, Jon - Ican see you're a little skeptical -
you helped, who had forgotten that humans weren't JON, Oh no! It's not that Ihave anything against you
objects - but I think you'l actually find that, so long personally. I'm just protective over my employees!
as you quickly ingratiate yourself into the environment We've been together a long time, you know, and we're
here, this is a fantastic place to work. For example - we more than an office at this point - we're like a little
have maternity leave now, where we let women leave family.
when they're giving birth. To be honest, head ofice (Hepauses and smiles.)
insisted on this, but I'm not even sure we need empathy
lessons in the first place. Warts and all! Unresolved anger and all! Love and
SOFIA. Except that - Isee that you had another incident familial albuse and decades of bubbling resentment and
just last night. One of your employees was on the ongoing power struggles and all!
phone with someone and made up a new curse word sOFIA. Well - I'm not here to mess with your...family.
and usedit upwards of -forty-seven I want to strengthen it.
JON. Yeah, sure. I've heard that before.
JON.(Overlapping.) Forty-seven times, yes. Although to be
fair, it was an accurate description of what he wanted (Eaplaining)
to do to her.
I come from a pretty dysfunctional family myself.
SOFIA. I think some empathy training could help you avoid SOFIA. I know all about it.
a situation like that altogether. I'm going toturn this (He looks a little doubtful.)
office into an empathy engine!
JON. (Nodding, thinking.) Okay... Really, Jon - I can relate.
(Pause.) (He shakes his head with shame.)
And what is empathy, exactly? Is that...a type of..it's JON. No,but I'm talking like - imagine.adivorce.
not a bird. (Pause.)
SOFIA. No, it's...empathy is the ability to understand other That's what it was - my parents got divorced. You could
people's feelings. never understand.
JON. Like - hunger. And anger. SOFIA. (She decides on something.)You know what?
Empathy in action!
 14

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 16

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 18

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19
 SOFIA.HOWIE. 20
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 ANGER? 23
22 DO YOU FEEL ANGER? DO YOäFEEL

HOWIE. (On onding) Hello, is this
Donna Jcobs, from
16 Hampshire?
(TOSOFIA) That's me!
wOMAN'S VoICE. (On mconding.) Yes - this is Donna.
HOWIE. (On recording.) Donna, Iam a debt
Cash Flow Accounts, CFA, and undercollector
federal with
lo
Imust advise you that this is an attempt to collect
debt and any information given will be used for that
purpose. We have a claim in our ofice from
Industries in the amount of seven hundred andWharton
fob
four dollars and forty-eight cents. How are you today?
DONNA. (On recording) Well, I'm not too good.
HOWIE. (On recording.) Um. Fine.
DONNA. (On recording.) My husband is very sick.
HOWIE. Oh, okay. Iremember this one.
(On recording) I said that's fne.
DONNA. (On recording.) And Itake my debts really
seriously, but he's in the hospital again, and...ook.
please - Ispoke to someone at Wharton about this on
Monday.Have you talked to them since Monday?
HOWIE. (On recording.) Well, shit. I wasn't asking for your
whole life's story, bitch.
(SOFIA pauses the recording.)
You haven't gotten tothe bad part yet.
SOFIA. Let's just tallk about this part of the interaction for
now:. Does anyone see a problem right off the bat?
JORDAN. You're not wearing a dress.
HOWIE. Oh yeah.
SOFIA. Imeant with the phone call.
EVA. He said, "Shit, I wasn't asking for your whole life's
story, bitch."
sOFIA. Great. And why would that be a problem?
(EVA looks at HOWIE, who glares at her. No one
responds.)
Iwant to try something. Inside your packets, yor'll
find aworksheet. I want everyone to think about what
told us, and fill out two or three
DonnaJucobs just feling. Illdo it to0,
things that she may be
waits.)
(She writes, then
finished? Jordan - what do you think
Okay? Everyonefeeling right now?
Donna may be
(JORDAN looks over atEVA's paper.)
shaved.
JORDAN. Scared and a
shaved?
SOFIA. Scared and - a
JORDAN. Scared and -
(Looking over at EVA 's paper und trying to
understand the second word)
Scared and...a-scorned? Or, what? No - scarred and
ashawned.
SOFIA. Are you looking at Eva's paper?
JORDAN. No.
SOFIA. Eva, what did you write down?
EVA. Isaid, "scared and ashamed."
HOWIE. Ashamed isn't a word.
SOFIA. Yes it is.
JORDAN. Okay, so that's what Iwrote down.
HOWIE. Same with me. Scared and ashawmed. Next!
SOFIA. So- let's stay on these adjectives for just a second.
(She writes on the board: scared and
ashamed.)
Why might Donna be - let's start with scared.
(HOWIE raises his hand.)
HOWIE. Horn.
SOFIA. Horn. Oh - horny. You think this woman's horny?
HOWIE. What? No, I'm horny.
JORDAN.That's funny - I'm also horny, but Ijust had lunch.
SOFIA. So I don't want to talk about what we're feeling.
Iwant to talk about what Donna Jacobs is feeling.
 25
24 ANGER?
DO YOUFEEL FEEL
ANGER? DO YOU

HOWIE. How are we supposed to do that? looks.

We don't aboutEva.
her.
know HOWIE.It's the joke to EVA. She SOFIA
SOFIA. Just based on what she said on the (HOWIE shows She scream-laughs.
phone. horrified. Pause.
HOWIE. I don't understand why someone approachesthemen.)
should outweigh mine. else's feelings please?
SOFIA. Well - they shouldn't outweigh yours, but seeit,
they ca SOFIA. Can I her thepicture.)
be in conversation with yours. (HOWIE hands here.Who's this
HOWIE. But that's just giving me extra work. understand what I'm looking at
Ldon't
on the bottom?
(He hits the table, annoyed.) before she took out the pack of
Janie, right next to her.
Im so hunger right now! EVA. That's me
matches. And that's legs bent
SOFIA.Well - Howie. Whether you realized it or not, vove
and JORDAN.) But why are Eva's
actually just expressed afeeling to me, and I SOFIA. (To HOWIE
it. We're already on our way! appreciate uplikethat?
make the jokefunny do you not
(She looks at her sheet, and then writes on the HOWIE. In order to
understand jokes?
board.) SOFIA. Got it.
IWrote "worried" which
then...
is similar to "scared." and (Handing the diagram back to HOWIE.)
are not allowed here.
(She writes on the board.) Okay -new rule! Jokes about Eva
JORDAN. But -
Guilty. Now - Ithink this is interesting. Why might
she feel guilty? SOFIA. End of story.
Ieven
JORDAN. If she murdered. HOWIE.You're a bummer, you know that? Why am
listening to you? I don't know you.
sOFIA. Specific to this situation.
HOWIE. Because she got into a lot of debt. But that's not oug (He stands up and begins to walk around.)
fault - she should bave thought about that before she SOFIA. Howie - please sit down.
spent money that she didn't have. HOWIE. (Amused.) Well, actually here, in this office,
sOFIA. So - thanks for bringing that up, Howie. I think Istand whenever Iwant.
that's really common. "She should have." I think we JORDAN.And Isay this poem whenever I want: "Life is an
"should" others as a defense mechanism. We say what oblong"
someone "should" have done to convince ourselves that SOFIA. Well, I'm running thismeeting, so Iwould really
we would never be in their position. But when we do appreciate it if we could all abide by my rules for now.
that, we're also ignoring all of the specific things that HOWIE. Excuse me?
complicate a person's life! Empathy asks you to hold EVA. You know what? I ate my other twin in the mitosis
your judgment, and accept.. stage
(As SOFIA's talking, HOWIE has passeda paper SOFIA. That's all right, Eva.
to JORDAN. They're both laughing.) (She turns to HOWIE.)
Accept..guys - what's funny?
26 27
ANGER?
DO YOU FEEL FEEL
ANGER? DO YOU

it and
SOFIA. I found out about
understand that my presence here SOFIA. Oh, actually my
mom
was little
apply. Ever since I ability to
disorienting.
doing. So I'm
But I'm here to help, may be
andIknow what I'm really encouraged me to
had this special
going to ask that you let me run me feel like I people.
meetings the way Iwant to run them. these she made different kinds of
communicate with - all so well.
(Pause.) great, that your mother knows you Ear-va.
EVA. That's mother calls me
Now that being said, Howie
expressed that he wae Sometimes, by accident, my
hungry, and I want to honor that, Well- Id love to hear
more about that. For noW
so - let's take a combing
HOWIE. (Standing up.) Yes. I think we should take a breal youT calls too, as I was
SOFIA,
break - Iwas listening toAnd..
JORDAN. Icould eat. I'm super horn right now. through the others.
recording.)
HOWIE. Same. Eva - (SOFIA presses play on a
collector with Cash
SOFIA. (Gently to EVA.)Eva -
EVA. (On recording.) Hello!I am a debt
federal law I must
JORDAN. Eva - Flow Accounts, CFA, and under collect a debt and
to
HOWIE. Eva - do you want to get lunch with me? In a adyise you that this is an attempt
of threatening way? sort any information given will be used for that purpose.
We have a clain in our ofice from Rye Tech, Inc., in
EVA. Oh - I'm eating with Rafalgore today. sixty-eight cents.
the amount of forty-three dollars and
(Thinicing.) (Tò SOFIA.)Seems like that's all...by the book..
Oh, darn, Ibet hell want eggs.
SOFIA. Actually, remember, Eva, I'd like for you to stay (sOFIAfastforwards a bit.)
behind. And then - maybe we can eat together. (On recording.) I feel like tigers only do that when
EVA. (Relieved.)Oh - great. Sofia and Iare going to eat they're provoked...
together. (sOFIA fast-forwards more.)
HOWIE. Noice! No, no, but I'm stronger on the flute.
(HOWIE exits. JORDAN begins to exit, but then (sOFIA fust-forwards more.)
hangs back fora secomd.) (Hysterical laughter.)
JORDAN. Hey, before Igo, Ijust wanted to say that I'm
really glad you're here, and I've totally got your back in (sOFIA fast-forwards more.)
private. Okay - see you later! Someone with a mask keeps coming up to me at work
(He exits.) and mugging me, usually in the kitchen, and it makes
me afraid to eat my lunch. And I'm usually too scared
EVA. Are we - do you actually eat lunch, or...? and ashamed to eat breakfast or dinner either.
SOFIA. Yes - I do! But first... MAN'S VOICE. (On recording.) I said that I'm willing to pay
(She guides EVA to achair.) the money -
EVA. It's so cool that you're an empathy coach. How did you (SOFIA stops the recording.)
get into that job? EVA. Okay, so - shorter conversations?
SOFIA. 28
EVA. SOFIA. EVA. SOFIA.
work. to Don't..talk...about...mermaids?
(Guessing.) What
rule? EVA.
EVA.SOFIA. MAN'S
know INo, one then the tothis "Hi, e-mail
muggings. these You recording.)(OEVA.n SOFIA.
I During...times...when...
Oh! Or would
a to two
want But
but would kitchen say isall! You go know I mermaid... is
VOICE. shut
he I Thanks, (Pauses (SOFIA this minutes. Well,
- put thatreally So, (She about to (Pause.) ever (She
toHowie
got with think didn't I some my
help fivesomeone
and silly, so, pulls the...store...and broke (On want yes.
it, it, stops brain presses
all pages and recording.) But This
which
you. I so it abut break kind DO
responded due was Iwould butsorry upfew the tooff.
with it's sighs; the Sometimes, play I'm YOU
rule. of mug call
is respect, mad of I months
on fine. a recording.)
exclamation love just to rule. a pretend Iagain.) morelasted FEEL
great. abother her you... she - -
at mask
wanted Do hke
saying, it phone.) can't focused
the them. already
ago. I you
sometimes when for ANGER?
if want I I'm
theykeepseveryone get not four
to someone on...
"tooth" e-mail points drop sent to it.) it's
could
mugging want hours
help happening,
didn't everyone mepretend lwho
period, stop."
so quick aand you and
that to no thirty-
seem meknow I with pav?
And one
Im try I
so no inline an

SOFIA. EVA. EVA.

I'Ditch inSOFIA.
l Rafalgore.
this
that. andwhich
That'sthink trThanks,
y
Rafalgore,ofice Look. towil
allI about But I keep help. but
- know DO
ask! I if Mr. -
promise
it. and you And it's YOU
Now it
stick start feels Knee we'llfine. FEEL
let's you Cap
with
expressing safeT eat I'm
go that in ANGER?
to me! dating
I to placesweet
lunch. wil align
yourself
have and
pellets
Rafalgore
yourself that
your together
honestly, wil
back. with now,
be
29
 30

sOFIAS
Anyways
bye. whichPoint And all you. Just his difficult?
you because...more
He himunch said this It's
and want gory And- grunp,
that's of insecurities, went told
- that thatlong,MOTHER. a
TnESBAgph.) (SOFIA
(Pause.) one (Trying -I'm details,
to theokay, (Pause.) those (She (Pase.) little...unurual
break? conference
buttrying bring and me you
- lawyer-stuff.
all kicked I And
call you'rethere but look. laugha, within upDo
difficult toyou that And...well,called I Hi, is DO
to to you in and our room thought setting YOU
me remember him myroon. Three
Scene
supposed are getchange lawyers. need just I know I then minutes - him
back. neighbor
his people in litle
seriousso people for FEEL
many the to wanted And pauses) family alyesterday,
l out. s0, I'd up
I know.Okay? that the And you spider.
me She AMGER?
love to subject.) ty s0Tne
you your at Timothy, you when at
drawers! not
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use? to work - work checks
you Isadon' t had itsmust you, toIt's
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my sites! that hi m are been sine- hearbeen
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felreally I was heard yur inhe in
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to any you ten, for oice the
Compass I about
haddidn' to frm fathe
know t of have abot such and litle a
me
Bye to, the a

KON,sOFIA JON.sOFA JON.SOFA JON. sOFIA JOSotHesN. i,z'

SOFIA. dispose
you you You Okay. Wel.. From Missy? from You Okay. something?
tostill In forgot I That's No 0S WhatOkay. Hi
her VWell the
being mind rightknow
(Pause.)
Is.ah..hae And Jon! (ON
oftampon
smiles.) (He (He (Pause.)
great.
(Pause.) the (He It's (He headknow And do
and meantime I tampons. tampOns enten
didhangs looking nowwhat, night looks Jon. picks office, Vou is Ah DO
hitting
mugged. not what? thatis a that -
that Thanks because with to From upand you and YOr
great. up I'm SOFIA 2For a Infeeling?mean? before
- to up the Let the she FEEL
her how all she ever ridde?
She her. the so what going I the...
phone. ) me
ridde?periods. I closes
across Eva phone.) much. have
the and
can heard forget
Or.. the womens
said are But to just ANGER?
toldthings periods hoses.speaks ju st
the
someone she's politely
a o - her
me question call doctors
head? periods room? theres phone)
yesterdaygoing? going are? more up
abruptBy
keeps for this a no
to quietiy.) before?
look you. woman placce
coming that interrupt 2ssistant
into Would to
she's or
up it! 31
 DO YOU FEEL ANGER? 33
ANGER?
32 DO YOUFEEL

decided we should launch a time.

JON. I know, yeah. I entering the homne for the first
investigation intothe whole thing, formal stepmom, just
instead of...ingratiating
yourself with the family,
SOFIA.You did? That's - great. And "New rules! Shoes off in the house.
you're going kind
JON. What about how your
work's
coming along? allowed to hit on me." No one likes that
Are you You're not stepmom said those
ready to sign that form yet? of
stepmom! I hated when my
week.
SOFIA. Am I...? No. It's only been a things to me.
told head office that
JON. Right, but I already time. I'd get this (Pause.)
taken care of in record were you, is let these guys keep
What 'd do, if I Theyll be much more open to
let
SOFIA. Well, you might want to them know customs.
SOme of their
are actually moving; kind of slowly. Yesterdaythat thingsof
instead learning new ones that way. Like how I
eventually let
about forks. And I think youl
answering any of my questions, both Howie and my stepmom
teach me

just kept responding to me by saying they wanted to

Jordan actually find that -
"set this burn on fire (The phonme rings.)
JON. (Laughing.) Those guys, yeah. They're a pain in Sorry - one
second.
my neck, and Jordan's photography makes me really
nauseous, but I love them to death. (He picks up the phome.)
Hello? Ah! Missy!
(Pause.)
(He listens.)
Has Howie said "Baby says No yet?
the heck are they?
SOFIA. Ah - no.. Okay, wonderful. So - periods. What
JON. Well, that's good. Because once that's happened. (Listens, still chipper.)
there's basically no getting through to him. It's three Yeah...
steps: he'l hit the wall, he'll go to sleep, and then..how (Listens, still chipper.)
familiar are youwith Dutch horror films?
SOFIA. We just need a little more time. Okay...
JON.You have to be strategic about your approach. So do (Listens, getting slightly more wary.)
sound
you want some strategy? From someone who knows Okay... Missy - let me stop you. This...doesn't
this place pretty wel, and has seen how you talk to my right. What's your source?
employees? (Listens.)
SOFIA. I'm not sure Ineed strategy...
Personal experience. Wel...
JON. We're always using strategy with other people to some
extent. Think about -well, say - your father. You use (Listens.)
strategy with him, right? And WebMD. So...keep going, then..
SOFIA. I wouldn't call it strategu... I just - listen to him. (Listens - more worried.)
JON. Perfect, yeah. The only tip Ihave for you is simpie: Okay...keep going..
Lighten up! Families have customs, guirks - certain (Listens - more worried.)
ways of doing things. Meanwhile, you're the new
 ANGER? 35
34 DO YO FEEL ANGER? DO YOUFEEL

phone.)
JON. Okay, and then what? (He hangn up the
sonow I know!
Getting your period means
(Hin faceturna into panic.) JON. Okay,
And then - what? extra pee.
sOFIA. ...Extra..pee.
(He listens.) the others upprouching) So - Iil leave you
Oh my God! No. JON.(Hle nees don't forget - customs, customs, customs!
And
to it.
(He intens,) Because assIalways say, in my classic, thoughtful way..
No, no, no! Please! No! (He thinks long und hard.)
That's a big one."
(He beginn to cry.) uT'he wilderness? Oh boy, Mama.
Areyou freaking kiddiny me right now. This is the (He bops her on the nose with his finger.)
worst day ever. Boop!
(Sill noblbiny.) (He eaits as EVA enters. SOFIA's phone rings.
Iwant to kill myself. Iwish I were dead. Iwish I were She wilences it.)
dead.
SOFIA, Hi, Eva.
(He nerema lnto he phone,)
EVA. Hey! Sorry! Am I interrupting?
Junt tell me you maade the whole thing uy, Missy! SOFIA, Oh, no, it's just - my mom.
(He lintenH, getn angry) EVA. Youcan get it.
Idon't cure if you weren't lying, just - lell me you sOFIA, No, it'sokay. She's just...
(She puts the phone away.)
(He lhntenn,) She's in a tough spot. But -
Okay, fine, I'll give you back your chairH, and your (Puuse)
dining,room table, just...nuy lhul yonu were lying! You know when you look at someone and you're
(He Hutens -gulntng control af htnsef) just like,"Man. Everything you're doing, T'd do the
Yeah? opposite."
(He listenn, uturtinyg to nile a itle.) (She shakes her heud.)
Keally? Are you sure? Sorry. Overshare!
(He luughu a little.) EVA. Don't worry! I used to overshare all the time becuse
my ovaries were so big they had tomanually enlarge
Okuy, yealh. my pelvie cavity, but I don't anymore.
Okay. Okay. SOFIA. Did you want to tellme something?
(Hes laughing and lunghing now,) EVA. Oh, yes! I did what you said. I broke up with Ratalgore
All right, Missy - Iuppreciate it. Thanks for looking last night!
into that for me. SOFIA, Great! How did it go?
 36 DO YOU FEEL ANGER? DO YOU FEEL ANGER? 37

EVA. It went well, at first, because he was asleep.

awfulAlththing
when he woke up he started describing this
that he likes to do with towels, but - anyways. It'ss a
weight off.
SOFIA. Well, that's great.
(JORDAN and HOWIE enter.)
Hey guys.
(They barely nod at her. They're busy looking
atadrawing and laughing.)
What's so funny?
HOWIE. It's nothing.
sOFIA, Okay, well - how's everyone doing today? Ready to
communication?
learn about visual
JORDAN. Iwant to set this -
sOFIA, Burn on fire, Iknow, Jordan. But maybe today you'll
change your mind- because this exercise is usuallv
pretty fun.
(She smiles.)
So I'm going to show everyone some pictures, and
Iwant us all to name the feelings that are either visibly
displayed, or invisible but implied, using this list of
positive and negative feelings. Let's start off nice and
easy.
(She holds up a picture of two women
laughing)
What do you think is happening here?
(JORDAN and HOWIE begin laughing again.)
Okay, guys, seriously - hat is so funny?
EVA. It's about me.
SOFIA. But I already said - jokes about Eva -
HOWIE. Its not just about Eva, though.
JORDAN. It's also about you, Sofia, and other women, anda
lot of other nouns.
HOWIE. And plus, it's a joke. Lighten up.
ough see it?
SOFIA.Can I
(JORDAN hands her the picture.)
big Are those...our appendixes?
(Handing the diagram back to the men.)
No. Idon't like this.
HOWIE. Wow.
JORDAN. Okay.
HOWIE. Eva? Do you also hate our funny joke?
EVA. L...ah... I'm going to go to the bathroom, really quickly.
(EVA exits.)
HOWIE. Dowomen syncup when they go tothe bathroom?
SOFIA. Oh, well -
HOWIE. Jordan? Do women syncup when they go to the
bathroom?
JORDAN. The thing they've realized, after doing lots of
research, is that no one knows what syncing up actually
is. Also, everyone's starting to say that the clitoris is a
hoax.
HOWIE. I thought syncing up was when they all got a little
extra pee at the same time. Or maybe it just means
this...
(He points to the diagram again and he and
JORDAN Sstart laughing.)
Wait, no - we can't laugh about that, remember?
Feelings only matter in this room when they come from
people who have grossly mismanaged their finances.
SOFIA. Howie? Put the diagram away, please.
(He puts the picture away, frustrated.)
Thanks.
HOWIE. Bad Mommy.
SOFIA. Okay. Let's keep going with this exercise, and Eva
can jump in when she's back. So take a look at that list
of feelings..
 ANGER? DO YOU FEEL ANGER?
FEEL 39
DO YOU
38
sheets. HOWIE is thejoke?
handing out HOWIE. You like
(Shestarts sheclocks it. ) joke.
takesa sheetand sOFIA. I like the
angryashe HOWIE. (Approaching
her.) That's very cool of you.
take a look...
Ifyou guyswantto Thesearen't even real words. SOFIA.Also! I have a boyfriend.I have a boyfriend, Marcus.
SOFIA.
atthelist.) JORDAN. Oh, no.
HOWIE.(Looking
Norvis? HOWIE. Oh no.
nervous? meant to
SOFIA. You
mean - I am being told JORDAN. I never disrespect Marcus.
feel angythat
mean that I he work?
HOWIE. No - I cannot think is funny. HOWIE. Where does
what I can and Jeffrey and..
asking you to change
I'm not your SOFIA. He works at..
SOFIA. Howie - please. (She looks down at her shoes.)
whole worldview here.
Shoes.
HOWIE. Baby says No. know him. Right? Jordan?
I
(HOWIEfalls asleep.) HOWIE. Oh - sure!
Sound the alarm. JORDAN. Of course! Marcus from Jeffrey and Shoes!
JORDAN. Uh oh. HOWIE. We were all on a team together, ages ago. Does he
SOFIA. Wait! still eat lunch?
(Pause.) lunch.
SOFIA.Yeah - he still eats
just a.second.
Wait for just - wait for why you're angru. JORDAN. Is he still obsessed with ponds?
Howie? Howie! I understand SOFIA. Is he still...yeah. He is.
in here, and...
because I've just - swooped JORDAN. (Laughing like: Classic Marcus!) Yeah. Hes such
(Pause.) a good guy.
justdidn't understand the
You know what? I think I SOFIA. Yeah, Ill tell him you say hi.
joke. HOWIE. Great.
(JORDAN Looks at her skeptically,.) sOFIA. In the meantime..how would you feel about getting
I'm serious. Can I see it again? back into this exercise?
diagram.)
(HOWIE wakes up to hand her the HOWIE. For Marcus's lover? Baby says yes. So..
there's Janie in the
Okay, so-Isee the catfish, and (He looks at thepicture.)
calling her
corner, with blood on her nose, and Eva is Well - when Ilook at this picture, I feel - that word
crazy, and all of the other women are - you taught us before. Horn.
(Realizing.) SOFIA,So I want to focus on what these women are feeling.
Oh. This is a Piss Chart. JORDAN. Maybe they're...
(She looks at it, disgusted.) (Looking at the picture.)
I get it. That's really funny. When you don't feel safe.
(She scream-laughs.) SOFIA. Scared.
 DO YOU FEEL ANGER? 41
40 DO YOUFEEL ANGER?

EVA. You
were laughing atcthe Piss Chart?
JORDAN. Right. These women are scared. (Pause)
SOFIA, These women are- scared? When?
JORDAN. They have their danger-faces on. you were in the bathroom, I realized
One of them...has a gun? SOFIA. VWell, when actually.
HOWIE. Oh, duh! Which means that - it is funny,
side has a gun. thought...
Or - a guy off to the EVA. Because I
but implied?
JORDAN. Is that what's invisible SOFIA. To some
people, it's funny. And to others it's less
chainsaw event offstage?
HOWIE. Maybe there's a funny.
scared person. Right?
SOFIA. But think about a (Pause.)
face.)
(She makes a scared her bow Andthat's just - different feelings about this thing.
Oh, you look like my aunt, after Ishowed And that's okay. Yeah?
HOWIE. Okay.
Ibrush mny teeth.
you guys can think back
to a EVA. (Looking at SoFIA, ROt laughing.) Oh.
SOFIA. How about - maybe (Pause.)
time when you were laughing.
SOFIA. How about...next picture!
saw
Maybe these wWomen just
HOWIE. When we were - oh!
a Piss Chart. (She holds up a picture of a woman crying.)
JORDAN. So they're - happy? So - what do you think is happening here?
(Ezcited pause,) HOWIE. (Studying the picture.) She's happy.
women are happy! Good - that's SOFIA. Is she, though? Really look at it, Howie. What
SOFIA.Yes, Jordan! These
great! And so now - expression is this woman making?
(EVA enters.) HOWIE. Ah...it looks like she's making..
break?
say. EVA. Sorry, can we take a
EVA. Guys? I have something to SOFIA. Just - quickly, before that -
(She takes a deep breath.) (Back to HOWIE.)
before..is not funny.
Ithinkthat picture youshowed us
JORDAN. Wow.
You were saying - it looks like she's making...
EVA. Isaid I want to take a break.
HOWIE. Okay. -
SOFIA. Eva - SOFIA. Ah...okay. Let's just - let's take a break, but just
And
hanging, Howie. Remember what you were saying, okay?
EVA. I also wanted to say sorTy, Sofia -Ileft you picture's then - we can regroup after lunch.
earlier, but I agree with you. I feel like - that
really mean. JORDAN. Great - Im actually super horn right now.
lunch with me?
HOWIE.Well - I.,feel..ike it's really nice, so. HOWIE. Same with me! Sofia? Want to eat
Or - no, duh. Marcus.
(Pause.) EVA. Marcus?
And she liked it too. Her was just laughing at it. SOFIA. That's my boyfriend.
SOFIA. Oh, I
 DO YOU FEEL ANGER?
43
42 DO YOU FEEL ANGER?

Sofia. had thispicture of a mermaid in my room when I

EVA. I didn't know you had a boyfriend, EVA. I
Waslittle, and.
she always looked so happy. I mean, how
(Matter-offact.) coolisit to
breathe underwater? And I used to think I
kind of like her, in some way.
Hot name. was maybe
me eat somewhere? sOFIA. Sorry one second. Howie e-mailed to say he's
HOWIE. Eva? Want towatch "meeting up with Marcus - let me just...
for a second.
EVA. Ineed to talk toSofia EVA. (Pause as SOFIA checks her phone.) Anyways, one day
HOWIE.Okay. Tooth. Piss Chart into school and showed it
this kid brought a
(Proud) Eh?
to me during recess...and I went home feeling so sick
- "I feel like a
tooth."
Or, watch this, Sofia my stomach. And I looked up at the mermaid and
(Heexits.) Irealized, like - duh - I could never be her! Because
she definitely didn't unlearn
know what a Piss Chart was, and
(EVA looks at SOFIA.) Idid. And Icouldn't it.
SOFIA. Is everything okay? sOFA, (She sends a resporse, looks up andfocuses on EVA)
EVA. It's fine, I just - Yes. Amermaid. Maybe one day you will be a mermaid.
(Pause.) (She smiles.)
their joke? Now let's go get some lunch!
Why didyou laugh at the Joke. Imean - sure
sOFIA. Look, I wasn't laughing at ioke
Ilaughed at the joke,
but I didn't think the
fiunny. I just - I need things to start moving forwamd
- for yoUr sake, too.
Not just for the sake of myjob
my sake?
EVA.You laughed at that horrible picture - for
happened after Idid that
SOFIA. Well - you saw what Jordan used the
right? They started participating!progress today! Im
word happy" We fnally made real about that joke.
telling you - in reality, Ifelt nothing
EVA, Okay. Yes- okay, fine.
again this
SOFIA. Also I asked Jon about the muggings
morning, and he said he's on top of it. I promise you -
Ihaveyour back.
EVA. Okay. Okay.
(Pause.)
Do you ever wish that you knew yourself totally
independent from everyone and everything that's ever
touched you? Like, free of all context?
(Pause.)
 DO YOUFEEL
ANGER? 45
ANGER?
44 DO YOUFEEL

Yeah, I can see

how much they've grown. It's all
Scene Four JON.
just- very...
words.)
board and.Some papers (He tries to find the right
(SOFIA is setting up a twearinga dress. Daddysays, "Good!"
room. She's
in the conference messages.) (He smiles.)
She checks her voice
you again, I
Iwanted to try father you're reaady to signthat paper?
SOFIA'S MOTHER. Hi, dear. and Your said he's So I guess Jordan seems to like
been three weeks now,
- well.
SOFIA. Actually -
not quite yet. Like, -
times. And he said people are still great - but
a few
spoken to youtricky, wanted to make sure empathy now, which is
being alittle at work. So I what, Sofia?
JON. But
you're okay. (Exasperated.)
(Pause.) things in the negative?
Why are you always framing started,
about, ah...just to be and look at how
He also told me that he told yousides! But I did vwo m Think about where these guys
to pick
clear - Idon't want you are always two. So just trust far they've come!
you that there think empathy's a bird.
to remind
did storminto
his poker night and SOFIA. But I think they may still
me that - yes, I shattered all the mirrors in The other day at lunch they made a whole fuss over
thatI
Isereamed so loudly
reasons. And so if you're not eating chicken..
the house, but - Ihad my I'm - if von know that vou
calling me back because - if
youthink that ION, Whocares? You of all people should Jordan and
think I'm...what am I saying? can't blame someone for what they feel. If
Howie feel that empathy is a type of bird..if they feel
(Trying to clear her head.) it's a bird with sort-of...
me over here. Your mother
I'm just saying that it's still about you. Your mother (He pictures a bird.)
who loves you, and who worriesburgers, who stole your
who cooks youCheer-Me-Up once made a cardboard With strong, furry wings and big, detachable legs, then
bike back from Micky, and who hit the ceiling fan. that's just not that big a deal. And if youre asking them
house with youthat was so tall it to accommodate other people's feelings, I think it's
(Pause. Affectionately.) only fair that you accommodate theirs as well. I guess
send a SWAT team after
here's what I'm getting at. I told head office this would
So you call me back. Or I l be done by now, it seems done to me, and yet you keep
you. I love you, my little spider. Bye bye. finding ways to move the goalposts.
(SOFIA looks at her phone. JON enters.) SOFIA, I'm not sure that's true.
JON. You look nice today! I hear you went out
to dinner JON. No? You think the tWo of us are getting somewhere?
and
with Jordan and Howie? Or are you my cousin Rick, and I'm Auntie Eleanor,
SOFIA. Yes! Jordan showed me how to order my big dog no we have these long and fruitful talks with one another
friends in French. And yesterday, Howie identified five but then at the end of the day, the same number of
feelings for me. Imean, four of them were "hunger" animals still end up inside the radiator with a note that
says, "And once again, here be
murdered babes"?
but still.
46 DO YOUFEEL ANGER? DO YOU FEEL ANGER? 47

(Pause.) No--IItrust you. I just -

SOFIA.
JON. Some people are just...better at handling all Great, solet's bring
this thing home together! Okay?
kinds of people. And if you're actually as
finishing this job as you seem to think you arefar
iferfrom
ent JON. s Iliketo say...
Because as
(Hethinks)
maybe you're just the wrong person to be window.is nothing but a square that they cut out and
these guys. You know?in Maybe
to bring someone else
it would
instead. benefit handling
everyone
A
they put glass
in it. Okay? That's for damn Sure.
a quick hug,
(He burrows into her, gives herenters.)
SOFIA, But - no! and begins to erit. An OLD MAN
JON. It's not a personal thing! Youre objectivelu real. Hey, buddy.
great, okay, but these guys are tricky, and it might just Marcus?
be better for them to - (To SOFIA) Is this
it's..
SOFIA. Look. Let's set a goal of one more week. Okav? SOFIA. What? No,
some privacy.
(JON eyes SOFIA.) JON. I'l give you two
(sOFIA looks at the OLDMAN. He stares back
Ipromise that I can get them to where they need +ol at her.)
And I think you're exactly right - Ishould be taking
their feelings into account. You're usually right about this office.
OLD MAN. I'm here to blow up
these things. SOFIA.You're here to -
JON. Thanks. Do you like my arms? OLD MAN. Idont mean to interruptyou, but Iwant to
tell
Sit down!
SOFIA. Yes, I do. youa story first.
JON. Well..you're good company for me, so - one more (He pauses.)
week.
When Iwas five years old, in kindergarten, our class
SOFIA. Thanks. And - sorry, Jon, but Ispoke to Eva and would go out to the playground for recess. And I always
she still seems really nervous about those muggings, dreaded the free period because, wel, I had one friend,
JON.I also noticed that she was norvis about it Joseph, who lived on my block, but he had a much
SOFIA. Nervous about it - easier time...ingratiating himself with the rest of the
JON. Right, sorry - nor... class, and so that meant Iwas usually alone during
recess whileeveryone else played games.
(He positions his mouth to get it right.)
Nuer...veous about it... (Pause.)
sOFIA, SO I'm wondering if you started that investigation Anyways, one day I worked up the courage to just jump
yet? into the game and start running around! When all of a
JON. Yes! Of course I did. I said I would. Do you not trust sudden a boy in my class, Sam, walked up to me, and
told me that I couldn't play, because I was running in
me or something? the wrong direction and Iwas messing up the game.
(Hanging his head.)
(Pause.)
Guess my good-guy persona has a longer way to go
than Ithought.
48 DO YOU FEEL 49
ANGER? DO YOU FEEL
ANGER?

OLD MAN. So Iturned to my friend

he would vouch for me. And Joseph, because I realizedthe comfort in that clarity later,
Sam and the OLD MAN.
I only had it. Because of course, soon
after
turned to Josephtoo. And otherknew
locked eyes with me, then he Joseph looked up, kids
when II no longer crying is
that Ilearned thatweak,
actually shorthand for
turned away. and he and so I stopped crying. And
(He shudders.) being re.ally,really crying made me really strong,
news is - not Sam
the good set of standards. And
So I walked off the
playground and I started according toa really speciticduring recess. The bad news
And this teacher from the other class to cry. started inviting me to play
me, and she asked me why I came over crying, teachers stopped approaching
was crying. And I to is thatby never Wrong, and I never learned
to explain it to her, but
the place that my tears wwanted
were
me tofind out what was So now
feelings. the only feelings
coming from - it felt so complex about any new left
know where to begin. Was Icryingthat I didn't eve
I know are:
being out, being angry, being hungry
invited to play the game? Or because I hadbecause I wasn't and...there's one more, I
think..
WTOng direction? Or was it Sam, or run the
all of my feelings were moving Joseph, you know (He shakes it off)
think, or pretty
around so
of me that I could't get my finger onto quickly inside Anyways, you've made me feel left out,ofIbeing left out.
of them to keep it still and talk about it. any single one lose to it - some complicated kind
bombs...from my kitchen..
sO... I went and got these
(Pause.)
(Hetakes some cans out of his walker.)
So the teacher went over to Joseph to find out
happened. And as she walked away, I decided the most
what Andnow I'm going to blow up your ofice. I'm going
to -
painless way to deal with all of these feelings was to
Dush them outwards. Idecided what I was feeling was (SOFIA sharply inhales. He starts pressing the
anger, some complicated kind of anger, and I felt this cans.)
incredible urge to express that anger onto everyone Where are the buttons on these things? Where are -
around me. SOFIA. That's...
(Pause.) (She looks.)
Anyways, just as Iwas becoming increasingly trapped Dog food.
inside of my rage spiral, the teacher came back to me OLD MAN.What?
with allof the facts. And she knelt down to look at me,
and she said, "So. You feel left out, huh?" (The tension has left the room.)
When she said that - it pulled me right out of that hole SOFIA. You're holding dog food.
and placed me down on earth, beside her. Because OLD MAN. Oh. So I am, yes.Shoot - that was a little silly
suddenly, what I was feeling was very precise. of me.
- it stillhurt, but it was one single thing, andAnd so
it had
aname. Ididn't feel some complicated kind of (He shakes his head.)
Ifelt left out. anger. I knew I should have brought my lucky egg with me, to
SOFIA. Do I...know you? pullthis off.
SOFIA. Your lucky.wait a second...are you -
50
DO YOU FEEL ANGER? 51
ANGER? DO YOUFEEL

(EVA enters.) look tough and now

chugged gasolineto bunch of Legos.
EVA. Rafalgore! MAN. I once
OLD inside of my body looks
like a
(Going over to RAFALGORE.) the serious, you've got to-
know,and I'm
EVA. I
Rafalgore, what are you doing here? 1'm sorry, Sofia. OLDMAN.
Fine. I lgo.
him out of theoffice.)
(Angrily whispering to (She begins to escort
very RAFALGORE.)Ithought I was
clear the last time we spoke. I don't
you anymore. want to see
years younger, T'd find a
IfIwere forty I'm
way to really
But not ninety anymore.
OLD MAN. You're... hurt you. HOWIE and jORDAN
(EVA and oLD MAN erit.
He turns to SOFIA.) enter.)
Who are you? What's wrong?
SOFIA. I'm Sofia. HOWIE. Hey, Sofia. something's wrong?
SOFIA. How can you
tell
EVA. You're looking for ne. I'm Eva. Because you look - the face you
taught us before.
HOWIE.
OLD MAN. Oh, right. I have a story to tell
you. (He makes a scaredface.)
(He takes a breath.) right now.
JORDAN. Yeah, you look scared
I was on theplayground -
SOFIA. I - am
scared. Yes! Because someone just tried to
you
EVA. You're not supposed to be here. blow up the office. And I'm so glad that
OLD MAN. The bottom line is that I HOWIE. What?Who?
was going to
in here and shoot up your
office, but the gun wasCome
too sOFIA. No it's fine now. It was just Eva's ex-boyfriend.
heavy for me. So I brought these small bombs
instead. HOWIE. Ugh.
(He pushes the cans again.) JORDAN. Of course.
Where the heck are the buttons - SOFIA. No, no - it's okay. Let's go back to -
SOFIA. It's dog food. JORDAN. (He looks at her and thinks.) You must feel scared
EVA. Rafalgore. Those aren't bombs. right now.
OLD MAN. No? Oh - darn! Im feeling a really complicated sOFIA. I..ight. You just said that. And I'm glad you can see
kind of hunger right now! it, because
(Heslaps his knee angrily, then looks down HOWIE. I'm sorry in quotes to interrupt you, but if you just
at his knee.) said, "Eva's ea-boyfriend"...does that mean Eva's single?
SOFIA. Ah...well, I'm not sure, Howie
Uh oh, little Mr. Knee Cap - where the heck did you go,
my best friend? HOWIE. Because I would - watch this, Sofia -
EVA. You have to leave. (He chooses his words carefully.)
OLDMAN. Iused to take baseball bats and beat people's Iwould be curious to see how she would feel about
faces into the sidewalk for fun. giving me a blowjob without reciprocation.
EVA. You already told me that.
52 ANGER? 53
DO YOU FEEL ANGER? DO YOU FEEL

JORDAN. Oh, yeah. I feel that I love scream-cried on the phone for an hour
blowjobs Yes. I know.
I
didn't realize who I was
reciprocation.
HOWIE. I also feel that I love
blowjobs without EVA.
and a haalf the other day.
definitely
talking to. I baby...
I
wasn't answering phones when
reciprocation!
JORDAN. I also feel that I love without Iwas a
SOFIA.
little
No, no. It's just
- you were right before...it might
pretend that you're dating
(EVA re-enters, shaking her head.) be a good idea for you to
Someone.
EVA. Jeez. Rafalgore and his eggs! Sorry about
HOWIE. Ihear you're newly single? that, Sofia, EVA. Oh. Why?
know these guys. They're so
SOFIA. Because
- well, you
JORDAN. More subtly, actually, we were
wondering if you think they're right on the brink
easily distracted. But I empathy!
had a boyfriend...
of really understanding a boyfriend. But
SOFIA. Guys?
EVA. So you
want me to...pretend I have before? Because
HOWIE. Sofia, ifyou don't mind... isn't that going back on what you said
Rafalgore, remember
(There's incoherent screaming from offstage. ) you told meto break up with
don't mind beingwith
SOFIA. What's going on? sOFIA. I know,yeah, but - Iactually together, and go to
Marcus, you know, we get lunch
(Everyone goes to the window, to look down acknowledge
different ponds - and so... Ithink we canhorn, and look
below at the parking lot.) their feelings, or, more specifically, their
need
EVA. Oh. at how strong their horn is, and say, "Okay. They that
to work on that. But in the meantime, since its not
(Explaining.)
big a deal to shift my behavior around just a tiny bit,
Right as we were breaking up, Rafalgore realized that if maybe I should.."
he removes his leg from his hip, he can swing it around
like a baseball bat. EVA. Maybe I should...
(SOFIA sees the men re-entering the office.)
HOWIE. I'm going out there.
JORDAN. I'm going too. SOFIA. Look. We're up against a little bit of a clock, okay?
So I think it's worth..being a little strategic here.
HOWIE. (Valiantly, to EVA and soFIA.) We're going to (JORDAN and HOWIE enter the conference
protect you.
room.)
JORDAN. I'm a poet.
EVA. Idon't think you have to - JORDAN. WOw.

(HOWIE runs offstage. JORDAN fOllows him. HOWIE. He really knows how to put together an upsettir
sentence.
sOFIA and EVA watch frominside.) JORDAN. It never even occurred to me that you could use
Yeah, see - he's already asleep. Aw. Although when he towel that way.
wakes up he's going to say some shocking stuf. HOWIE. Eva -
SOFIA. (Turning to EVA.) Eva - while we have a second sOFIA.Thank you for protecting me, m'sir and msir. L
together.. jump right into today's exercise.
 55
54 FEEL
ANGER?
DO YOU FEEL DO YOU
ANGER?

(Going over to the board.) it?

whatabout
SOFIA. VWe're going to continue HOWIE.To
communication today. working on compassionate SOFIA. Cry.
(HOWIE looks around.)
to understand
what you're saying...
(She smiles.) I'mtrying HOWIE.) Howie, crying is
So someone will describe a HOWIE. Ah-- andsoftly, to another hose.
situation that elicits feelinee JORDAN. (Gently connected to
in them. And then a hoseis starts.
Iwant all of us to
that follow this formula: form sentences when the top offigure out where the top one
can't were
and so you
saying is - maybe youIt's a
no. What I'm it's not.
(Pointing to the formula on the board,) SOFIA. When- weakness. But
a
«You feel blank because blank, is that taught that crying is to give you permission to access
then Person One will say, "Yes, that's right,right?" And strength. And I want
I
because blank," or, "No, that's not right, Idofeelnotblank your feelings.
but
sad about
Ireally don't feel and the
blank because blank." Sound good? Who wantsfeel to
you, Sofia -
HOWIE. Thank murder. She died when I was ten,
start? my mother's
about it is...
most I feel mother was
(Pause. She loolcs around.)
Maybe you feel powErless because your
EVA. I can...
EVA.
murdered. feel
feel sad, and I don't
(HOWIEs hand shoots up.) HOWIE. No, I don't! I don't
HOWIE. Sofia? I can start. powerless!
SOFIA. Great. Go ahead. (He throws a chair.)
-
HOWIE. So this morning, Istood in front of my mother's SOFIA. Now hold on a second
grave site for like a half an hour, and I thought about JORDAN. Let me just - Howie!
how she was murdered - or, Iguess not murdered,but, (Turning to HOWIE.)
stabbed in the body untilshe died. murder?
SOFIA. Okay. Thanks for sharing that with us. Who wants Maybe you feel...nothing about your mother's
to respond to Howie? HOWIE. Maybe I feel..maybe I feel...
EVA. (Looking at the board.) You feel sad because your JORDAN. Maybe you feel nothing. Or, said differently
mother was murdered, is that right? "You feel nothing because your mother was murdered.
SOFIA. Great! So, if that resonates - Is that right?"
HOWIE. I feel...oh my God. Of course.
HOWIE. (Steamrolling her.) No, that's not right, Ido not feel
sad because my mother was murdered. (He thinks, then gasps.)
SOFIA. Okay. Are you sure? So many years replaying my mother's murder, and how
HOWIE. Yeah. I held her in my arms as she gasped for airand told me
SOFIA. But - Howie. Have you ever been able to really that she never really loved me, and I never understood
how Ifelt about it. And now I know.
explore how you actuallyfeel about your mother's
murder? Like- were you ever given permission to cry (He takes a breath.)
about it?
 57
56 FEEL ANGER?
DO YOU FEEL po YOU
ANGER?

HOWIE. Yes. That's right. Ifeel

was murdered. nothing becausc my sOFIA.Jordan? little.
guess just a
(He is breathless.) mother Well, I
JORDAN. W as-
itback because I put
Oh, wow. Ifeel so seen. Thank you, sOFIA,Say that's right- I feel embarrassed
Sofia. Yes. laughed at for it.
SOFIA. You're...welcome. JORDAN.
there and|I was
myselfout
(Pause.) Good. Good job, guys.
sOFIA. EVA.)
JORDAN. I'd like to go. (She turns to
SOFIA. Okay - great. Go ahead. Eva? feel
JORDAN. Well, so - yesterday, I asked a girl - I mea You feel
ashamed because you were made to
a woman - I mean an
old woman - Out EVA. right?
on a d: small, is that
was sort of - ah - the word we
learned the date. I Yes, that's right. I feel ashamed because I was
vulner-ah-blay. And I guess - well, she said other day -
no to me,
JORDAN.
made to feel
small.
which is obviously her right, because great, Jordan.
but, yeah - she said no...and then all keepee beepeep,
of these sOFIA. Great, Eva -
HOWIE. You feel -
around her started
laughing at me. And people feel big?
just laughing and laughing, as this they were (To SOFIA.) When you don't
and - so - yeah. enormous groun SOFIA. Small.
SOFIA. VWow. Okay - thanks. So who wants to go were dismissed.
first? HOWIE. You feel small because you
HOWIE.I can. JORDAN. Yes. I feel small...
(Looking at the board.) (He begins to tear up.)
Jordan. Yes,I feel small because -Iwas dismissed.
(Considering the sentence structure on the (Processing this.)
board.)
Ifeel small because...
You feel like - like, youwere
right, and she laughed at youputting yourself out there,
for it, and so you were
(JORDAN bursts into tears; he continues tocry
like - like - you, like - like like like - throughout this nert exchange.)
SOFIA. Embarrassed? Oh God! Yes, yes - that's right! She made me feel small!
HOWIE. Right - you feel Oh no - now I'mn hose on top of a hose so you can't see
embarraIsed because you put
yourself out there and you where the top one starts!
were laughed at for it, is that SOFIA. It's okay. That's good.
right?
JORDAN. Oh, I don't... JORDAN. Iwas just using my normal line of saying, "Doyou
SOFIA. So - really think about that. Say it want to see a show-y?"
HOWIE. You feel embarrassed because youagain.
put yourself out
SOFIA. "Do you want to -" What's a show-y?
there and you were laughed at for it, is that JORDAN. A show-y!
right? HOWIE. It's what you leave sort of open!
 59
58 ANGER?
FEEL
DO YOU FEEL DO YOU
ANGER?
JORDAN,
Ijust
And she told nne to
stop (Pause.)
talking to
wanted to do a little show-y...
SOFIA. So you can also do a
show-y...
JORDAN. Andthe security guards
had ticket to
a started
her. when sOFIA.
go.
Wantto
EVA. I Okay,great.
JORDAN.I'mshaking.
began forcing methis stupid charity asking ifI even aheadEva.
off the
SOFIA. Off the - stage... stage...
JORDAN. I bet she didn't even deserve
dinner. .and they go
sOFIA. first time I got mugged in
Okay,
EVA. The
yearsago.
this office was two

even know what an that Let'sjust

HOWIE. No one does! oncologist is! award!
I
don't SOFIA,Ah -
hm. Eva?
happened. The world was sO
normal when it
same that the
mugging
EVA. After it exactly the
JORDAN. (Scream-crying.) She was just. was over. It was
so
this strange blip, tothe
point
so like like I had made
HOWIE. I understand,
JORDAN.
Jordan - freaking
hot - started to feel
where I actually started wonderingwhether
mis-rememnbered
(Overlapping.)
show-y -
And Ijust
wanted to do a the whole thing up,
or drastically
thought, "Huh. Thatfelt like
such
HOWIE &JORDAN. All over her tits! big it or something. I a big
clearly it was not actually This
HOWIE. Of course you did! a big thing to me, but more.
happening more and
thing" Then it started kitchen
JORDAN. (Overlapping.)I'm a poet! morning, Iwas mugged person on my way into the me
HOWIE. You're a poet! came up behind
to get some coffee. The side of my head...and I
couldn't
JORDAN. Life is an oblong! Nice guys and hit me across the
ear, and Inoticed I was
always fnish last!
HOWIE.(Like a monster.) We always fnish really feel it, but I touched my
last! bleeding.
(JORDAN lets out a scream-sob.)
Doyou see, Sofia? Were doing it! (Pause.)
We're really doing it. the kitchen in
(A bird flies across the Anyways, suddenly I was on the floor of
Iwent
Oh wow - look!
stage.) a ball, and I wasn't being mugged anymore. Soand the
back to my desk without getting my coffee -
(In awe.) world was still...the samne.

Empathy. (Long pause. Everyone looks at her.)

(The men stare at the bird. SOFIA
them warily.)
JORDAN. (Wiping his tears away.) Wow.
(Laughing)
We solved it. We solved
empathy.
HOWIE &JORDAN. We. Solved. Empathy!
Is someone going to respond?
watches SOFIA. Yes. We're allgoing to respond, right guys? Can we
respond to Eva, using the sentence structure?
JORDAN. Eva. You feel tired because you didn'tget your
cofee, is that right?
EVA.Yes, Iguess so. But that's not really -
SOFIA. And so - we'll keep finding - but in the meantime,
say the full sentence back to him: "Yes, that's right -
Ifeel tired because.."
60 61
ANGER?
DO YOU FEEL
FEEL ANGER? DO YOU
EVA. Yes, that's heartbroken,and wTonged
coffee. right - Ifeel tired afflicted,
right?
JORDAN. You feel because I didn't Youfeel
JORDAN.
wary,
mugged,isthat
SOFIA. Okay, let's -mugged because you got get my got
becauseyouright. mugged.
HOWIE. (Looking atanyone else? Hovwie? mugged. becauseyou got
That's
the EVA.Yes!YoufeelI weak way..
got list.) You feel JORDAN. that's also right, in
a
mugged.
mugged. . you. yfeelou thrilled,
feel content
improbablay becausebecauyouse yougot guess-
EVA. I
Youfeel
because
iinferior you got mugged.
because you got
EVA. No. I don't. mugged. inquisitive and hopeful HOWIE. question.
sentencefully like
That is so wrong. SOFIA.Asa the neat
HOWIE. Whoa. Sorry. (HOWIE Speaks but makesa question-mark
SOFIA. Now it's acommand,
up-sound qterit.)
holdon, guys. Howie - mugged. Eh?
Something sensitive
patient with you whenwith you - and Eva is inferior because you got
his mother's you assumed heEva, HHowishar
e iwasng HOWIE. Youfeel
I...
murder. felt - Iguess
It's sad
respectful of one another. really important that weabout EVA. I mean formula?
stay SOFIA. Usingthe trouble...
(Gently, toHOWIE and having some
from JORDAN. ) Maybe EVA. I don't - I'm
to try some words too, ifthat helps.
JORDAN. Where?
the bottom of theyou
list?guys want JORDAN. I can say it EVA.)
(JORDAN moves closer to
(Looking at the page down.) because you got mugged.
You feel distressed You must feel very inferior humiliated. Is that right?
because you got mugged? Very inferior, and very
EVA. Yes! Yes, that's right, That's right.
I feel distressed EVA. (Emotional.) Yes.
mugged.
SOFIA. Good, Eva! Good, Jordan!
because I got HOWIE. This must be so difficult slash
unpleasant.
EVA. It is. It really, really is.
HOWIE. Where did you find that word? (She startsto cry. HOWIE moves closer
to her.)
mean? What does that
even
JORDAN. Down under the "difficult slash HOWIE. Well, I'm glad that we're connecting,better
though needless to say I wish it were under
feelings" part. unpleasant circumstances...
(HOWIE looks down.) (He moves in for a kiss.)
HOWIE. These are all real words?
EVA. (Snapping out ofit.) Wait - no.
(Reading from the list,) SOFIA. Okay - hold on...
You feel lost because you got mugged, is JORDAN. If Ican make this exchange more subtle...
EVA. Yes, that's right - I feel lost that right?
because I got (HOWIE and JORDAN move closer to EVA. She
HOWIE. You feel in despair and disappointed mugged.
because you
screams.)
got mugged, is that right? You feel alarmed, anxious, EVA. Idon't want to kiss you. Idont want to kiss either of
panic, doubtful - you.
 63
62
ANGER?
DO YOUFEEL YOU
FEEL

ANGER? DO

SOFIA. Because aren't SceneFive

EVA.dating... Marcus? you dating sonmeone, Eva?

No, I'm not. I spider.
you guys make me
HOWIE. What?
don't want to kiss
feel unsafe. either of
Aren't you
you
MOTHER.
N
SOFIA'S
Hi, my
little
And I don't know.
JORDAN. Wow.
EVA. Sofia?
because (Pause)
still
haven't
heard from
maybeyou
you.
- not
werejustweren't
doingwell
or
but
doing wel,that
I woTried you father
SOFIA, VWell... Ithought was your
hearfrom it. I just.. I'm
something, I well. I hear
doing
(Pause as SOFIA looks at the hearyou're
-I doingwell.And Imglad to
turns to EVA.) men, and then vOutre
notdoingwell.
I'm sure they ofmy
EVA. don't mean to make you (Pause.) taken so much - are
(Frantically
do you mean and angrily.)
feel unsafe.
Well,to?they do, Sofia - what
they don't mean
know. Your
And I don't And nowI'm
father's
standing here like
they do! I'm world from me.
SOFIA. Hey! I'm trying to telling you that yougonetoo?
and empathize with juggle a lot of people right now (Pause.) botheringyou. So
EVA. You're not everyone... Whatever's happening, Ifeel like I'm Okay - bye.
SOFIA. I am emmpathizing with me!
going to leave you alone. I love
you.
empathizing
you feel unsafe, with you! Iunderstand, okay.
and norvis, and it makes me
I'm
(SOFIA is in the conference room, setting
JORDAN enter together,
stomach. But - and
sick to mny up. JON, HOWIE,
EVA. Nervous. happily.)
SOFIA. What did I say? JON. Congratulations! empathy.
EVA.You said "norvis." lunch that they solved
The guys told me over
SOFIA. Okay, but - SOFIA. That they..
celebrate as soon as you
EVA. Iwant to be left alone. JON, And so I thought we could
SOFIA. Fine. Why don't we just - take a sign that paper!
breather. Eva, let's We have more
get some lunch - SOFIA. Actually - we're not done quite yet.
EVA. (A little unhinged.) Isaid I want to be exercises to go through.
Iwant to be left alone! I want to be left alone! HOWIE. Is this a joke?
left alone! with
(EVA exits. Pause.) SOFIA. It's great that you guys have gotten in touch
HOWIE. Jeez.
empathy. And now we have to apply that empathy to
your work calls.
JORDAN. Yeah. HOWIE. But -
HOWIE. So much for professionalism. JON. Sofia.
64
65
DO YOU FEEL FEEL ANGER?
ANGER? DO YOU

SOFIA. (To JON.) If you'd like to front ofme

youll see what I mean. watch for a you're right in
second, maybe uoWIE. No, I'm
not - us. I noticed
you're being really hard onthe traumatic
(Checking her watch.) JORDAN. Sofia,
sad tor me at
all about
oncologist
Where's Eva? that you werent through with the pediatric
JORDAN. She's in the bathroom. cituation Iwent Achievement Award
Lifetime
who was getting atechnology to save terminally
ill
SOFIA. Fine, then - let's just new
start. The for creating a
listened to week one, with Donna.
Here'sphone call children.
situation, on these sheets... a
recap of herwe SOFIA. Excuse me?
hell's my bat?
(SOFIA begins to hand Out HOWIE. Where the
sheets of compassionate communication,
everyone.)
SoDonna's
paper to SOFIA. Let's remember
husband was sick, right, he was back in Howie...
bat is behind the
bookshelf
hospital,
So using the
and
Donna owed money that she JORDAN. You feel like your the bookshelf, is that right?
must be feeling. Howie.
didn'tDonhave.
sentence structure, tell me how because Jon put it behind
angrily.)
(HOWIE grabs his bat. He holds it up,
HOWIE. Idon't know Donna. She's not even here. you, all right? Just put the
SOFIA. Pretend I'm Donna. JON. Oh darn. Howie! I'm with
bat down. I'm with you.
HOWIE. "You feel like an idiot, Donna, (HOWIE puts the bat down. SOFIA
turns to
because you spent
money that you didn't have, is that right?» JON.)
sOFIA. Howie...try again please, without the judgment. SOFIA. Thanks, Jon.
HOWIE. Okay. Without the judgment, I could say.. (Smoothing out her dress.)
(Looking directly at sOFIA.) Let's take a break.
Pay the money. JON. (Disapprovingly.) Take a break? Sofia...
SOFIA. Using the sentence structure. SOFIA. "Sofia' what?
HOWIE. You feel scared because if you don't pay the money, JON. I can't believe I didn't see it before. No wonder
I'm going to hurt you, is that right? you haven't had success here! You're provoking my
(sOFIA inhales sharply and looles directly at employees.
him.) SOFIA. How am I provoking them?
SOFIA. No, that's not right. Try again. And this time JON. By telling them that other people's feelings should
outweigh theirs! You're asking them to change their
(HOWIE stands up.) entire worldview!
What are you doing? (Pause.)
HOWIE. I'm looking for my baseball bat. Ihave used so many different strategies with you. I've
SOFIA. What do you need your baseball bat for? You're spoken your language, I've been the Auntie Eleanor to
talking to someone on the phone. your Rick. But at some point, you know, I have to be
the boss. I have to take care of my family.
66 67
DO YOU FEEL ANGER?
ANGER? DO YOU
FEEL

(He begins to sign the

SOFIA. You can't just...sign it. paper himself) areyou
laughing?
JON. I did just sign it. So I HOWIE. Why joke.
think we're done Becauseit'sa it.
SOFIA. Fine.
here. sOFIA.
don'tthinkyouget just -
HOWIE. I same, maybewe can
(She starts to leave.) the
sOFIA. Wellall
HOWIE. Hey - I heard you got fired. (Pause.) scared?
feel - remember
Over a drink? Want to tal k Youwouldn't
want to make me
JORDAN. Want to talk about it on about it JORDAN. Lighten up.
SOFIA. No, because- Marcus! top of a pond? blowjobs without reciprocation.
HOWIE. I love
HOWIE. Marcus, right. Marcus is JORDAN. Ilove
them too. best.
cheating
JORDAN. We saw him in a grocery store On you, JON. Ido too. I think
they're what Ilove the
a blowjob without last
reciprocation from night, SOFIA. Get away
fromme.
WOmen.

SOFIA. No you didn't. hundredsgettingof (Shepicks up HOWIE's

JORDAN. Calm down.
baseball bat.)

HOWIE. Andthere was a

side -
catfish watching, just off to HOWIE. You're acting crazy.
the JON. C'mon, Sofia - meet us
halfway.
SOFIA. You didn't see that.
SOFIA. Meet you halfway?
(Turning to JON.)
(Pause as she computes this.)
Jon?
Iam meeting you all the way! You
haven't moved an
(Pause.) inch.
JON. (Turning to HOWIE and JORDAN.)Yeah - guys... (Getting increasingly angry.)
(Pause. He sighs.) Ilisten to you, Icater to you, Icall you on the phone...
The Marcus thing. Isaw it too. It's terrible, really - JON.Call us on the phone?
some men can be such pigs. Awful, awful. SOFIA. Well - not you, but -
(He brightens.) (She screams and smashes the bat onto the
table.)
So! How do you feel about blowjobs without
reciprocation?
(The men start to close in on her.)
JORDAN. How do you feel about my poetry?
HOWIE. or me personally, I love blowjobs without
reciprocation.
(They alU laugh. SOFIA tries to join in half
heartedly.)
 69
68
DO YOU ANGER?
FEEL ANGER? YOUFEEL
DO
a
dressedlike
Scene Six stall
ofthewashher hands.)
comes out
beginsto the end
(EVA mean, at
(Bathroom
in one stallstalls appear
with the onstage.
mermaid.She
really
honest - I
mnore to the point.
Im

sits in the other door closed,

stall on the Someone
and
ie
ANIE.And do
be him. But
justtoblame
blamingmyself.
door open, going toilet wwithJANIE oftheda,
I not
on that.
mostlyfocused wayof saying end, it's really not
a
through
wearing her cardigan and purse. She'the%
her a nice the down.
from the office.)
(SOFIA
holding her mug /ANIE.
That's
And blame
that in
EVA.Yes. I'vedecidedsomeone for
wearing you
they'reonlyright
because
bursts into the room.) badthing to
yourealize -
JANIE, Hi. Especialywhenup therules.
and Janie.
Ialso
they'remaking understand -
(Looking at her.) looksatJANIE.)
I
You must feel scared right EVA. (She you down.
now. know Ilet
SOFIA. Ido. I do feel scared. SOFIA, Eva. hi.
Oh -
JANIE. Do you want to sit down? seesSOFIA.)
EVA.(She beautiful.
(SOFIA sits. JANIE smiles at her and then look
SOFIA. You
to the closed turme EVA. Thanks.
the stall.)
bathroom stall. EVA speaks from here to sync up
with us?
JANIE.Are you
EVA. What were yousaying? I'm stilllistening. SOFIA. No, I - no, keep going.
(Entering the stall.) Wait, wait. Or -
JANIE. Oh... Iwas saying that - I agree with you. JANIE. pee.
can
Nothing But talk louder so that I
happens in a split second. One tiny moment after to pee.)
one
tiny moment turns into a big moment. So it's hard to (She closes the stall and begins period.
I'm not even on my
blame anyone in one of those tiny moments - because SOFIA. Icame here to be alone.
hers.
it's hard to even recognize it as a moment in the first EVA. That's okay. Janie never gets
place! And what does that do to you? JANIE. It's true.
(She thinks.) SOFIA. Then how..?

Ithink when no one'sreacting to it, you assume it must EVA.Well, she can still bleed.
be normal. You put it onto yourself - you figure if youre SOFIA. What about you?
the only person clocking this little thing as being some EVA. Yes. I'm bleeding.
sort of problem, then you must be wrong. You must be SOFIA. Mermaids stillget their periods?
the problem. And you sit alone with that and it seeps (Looking at her.)
into your pores, and it morphs into...well, that becomes
self-loathing. And meanwhile, all those little moments But where does it come from, when you have a tail?
keep piling on top of one another. EVA. No. I already told you.
SOFIA. You did?
(Pause.) EVA. Yes. Remember? I told you I was bleeding.
Andthen all of a sudden you look up, and you're setting
the office on fire.
 71
70 ANGER7
DO YOU FEEL FEEL
ANGER? DO YOU

(SOFIA looks at EVA.

JANIE exits the
bleeding fromher nose.) stall. (Pause.)
SOFIA. Careful - your - your
nose is...
She's I'm sorry.
basks in her daughter's
(She, goes over to JANIE (sOFIA 3mother
under her nose. She thenand puts a
paperwhotowel voice.)
spider.
bleeding fromher ear.) looks at EVA, Mylittle
sOFIA'SMOTHER.you feeling?
Oh God - your ear! are
SOFIA. How
(She runs 0ver to EVA and
clean up the blood. There's starts
a lot trying to End of Play
paper towels don't really help.) of it. The
Why is it - it won't stop!
JANIE. No, it won't.
EVA. Oh - careful. Your hands.
SOFIA. My hands?
(She looks down at her hands and
theu're covered in blood. soFIA turns sees that
to EVA.)
Eva.
EVA. Ican't forgive you.
SOFIA. You can't?
EVA. Ican't hear you! I've got blood in my ears.
SOFIA. Okay, but all the same. Ishould have -
EVA. Isaid Ican't hear you, Sofia.
(The lights change. The bathroom is gone.
SOFIA is alone on stage, still covered in blood.
Shestands in silence. Then she picks up her
phone and calls someone. Across the stage,
SOFIA'S MOTHER walks over to a ringing
phone.)
SOFIA'S MOTHER. Hello?
SOFIA, Mama? Mama!
SOFIA'S MOTHER. Sofia.
(sOFIA begins to cry.)
SOFIA. I couldn't-Ishould have -