My mom came to visit me you know here in new york city and uhh she uhh she wanted to

go to a broadway play -that’s her idea of new york, broadway- you know, they got the
broadway plays?

She comes out from…canada?

Canada! Yeah, from Otawa, Ontario Canada and uhh, she’s uhhh, you know, she don’t
know like, she’s not a big city person like you and me. So she’s like uhh, she’s like “ohhh
we gotta go see a broadway play!” so uh… but I didn’t wonit’ ‘cause the last time I-I she
came and visited I took her to this broadway play and I’ve never been to a broadway play
ya know, so I took her to this one, they had this one “how to succeed in business even if
you don’t really care to”

Right..

And uhh, I take her to that

S-Sa-Sarah Jessica Parker..?

Sarah Jessica Parker.

Right.

She wasn’t there, they had some other lady. So uhhh so uhhh we get in there and uh, I’ve
never been to a play, oh my God it’s horrible! You go in and uhhh you gotta sit there, little
chairs, you are all crunched up, cost like 90 bucks or summin’ like that…and then you sit
there and you watch it and this dudes come in they’re all uhhh doing stuff you know and
uhhh the thing is like y-you kinda gotta use your imagination a lot ‘cause they’ll go… like
it’s an office, right? Meanwhile it’s just a chair and a desk! You know? And then they have
like maybe a window with like a fake moon behind it so you go..”ohhh I guess it’s nighttime
there ya know. And uhhh it’s like just hellish you know…and then everybody’s singing
everytime, you know? And uhhh singing and dancing around and uhh and uhhh it was
about business ya know, about the business world ya know? And so uhhh at one point
there uhhh coffee guy comes you know? He’s bringing in the coffee and uhh so then they
all get excited cause the coffee is coming and uhh, so uhh they’re singing “oh here’s the
coffee we want to drink the coffee!” you know? And uhhh…pretty excited about that…and
my mom -she talks- she’s used to just watching the TV and so she doesn’t know that
you’re not supposed to talk out loud and uhh so she’s like the whole time she’s like “ohhhh
good God, that’s just like me! I have to have my coffee in the morning!” “Alright…” you
know? And then I think the coffee machine broke? Then everybody went “ohhh we can’t
have our coffee” so it lasted forever and like and just you are like watching the stuff trying
to imagine what it would really look like on the TV you know? So then finally…finally the
damned thing is over; takes like an hour and a half and you go “Ok, let’s get the hell out of
here”. You go out, it’s not over! It’s intermission! Intermission, you know, is you go out in
this crowded foyer just packed with people; they’re all discussing it you know? They’re
going “hey remember the coffee there?” and… and I’m going “holy Lord!” so I see… I see
some dude that works there and I go “hey listen: you got that you got that…uhhhh Nick –
Charlotte game on somewhere?” ‘cause I knew that the Nicks were playing uhhh the
Hornets there and uhhh the guy “No, no sir, no no” you know? And I go “anything? The
sports tip or summin’ like that?” and he goes “no this is the theatre!” you know he’s all like
snooty you know? “This is the thea-“and “The” like, it’s “A theatre” they’s got a whole
bunch of ‘em! The theatre….