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Best Me Technique
Co-authored by Julia Lyubchenko, MS, MA
Last Updated: February 24, 2021 Approved
Method Method 1 of 4:
1 Getting Ready
1 Choose a time when you are not too sleepy. The goal is to withdraw
from the world so that you can focus on the visualizing succeeding your
goals. If you're too tired, you might just nod off instead.
2 Eat a light meal 1-2 hours beforehand. It can be hard to focus your
mind if you are either hungry or too full. Eat enough to give you energy for
meditation, but not so much that you are overfull.[2]
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3 Find a quiet place to practice the Best Me Technique. You want to find
a space where no interruptions or sudden noises will pull you back to the
world around you. A small, uncluttered space in your home is ideal.[3]
4 Make sure you will not be interrupted. Turn off your cell phone or
pager. If you have a land-line, turn off the ringer. Ask your family not to
interrupt you during your session.
Adopt a comfortable position. Sitting is best, as lying down may cause you
to fall asleep. To best enter a state of hypnosis:[4]
5
• Choose a comfortable position for your legs. A classic meditative position
is to cross your legs, but you may prefer to kneel, lay your legs out
straight, or sit in a chair. Just be sure it is a position you can hold
comfortably.
• Keep your back straight. A straight back will help you to breathe deeply.
Sit in a chair if you find it difficult to keep your back straight without one.
• Place your hands where they will not distract you. You can place your
hands on your legs or put them together in a praying position, whichever
works best for you.
Method Method 2 of 4:
2 Entering Hypnosis with the Best Me Technique
3 Imagine yourself in your safe place. This is the sensation and physical
experiences part of the process. Use all of your senses, not just sight. As
you imagine each detail of this safe place, let its calmness relax you.[9] For
example, if your safe place were a beach at sunset, you would concentrate
on:[10]
• The colors – the red and golds of the sunset, the blue of the water
• The sounds – the crash of the surf and call of the gulls
• The sensations – the wind on your skin and the warm sand beneath you
• Smells – the pure sea air with a hint of saltiness
4 Let the peacefulness of your safe place drive out negative emotions.
[11] Absorb the peace around you. Feel yourself becoming calm,
5 Allow the calm of the space to drive away all thought. Thoughts will
inevitably flit through your mind at first. Don't fight them. Rather, gently
return your focus to your safe space. You are sinking into it and shutting
down. Sinking down and shutting down. Sinking down and shutting down.[12]
• If you have difficulty pushing away a negative thought, imagine putting the
image on a TV screen, then use a remote control to put it on mute, to
make it black and white, and to turn it off.[13]
• You can also imagine putting the image in a drawer and closing the
drawer.[14] In fact, get rid of it in any way you want. Just don’t set it on
fire or blow it up because it’s supposed to be relaxing.
7 Expect to sink deeply into your safe space. Don't worry about whether
you will achieve hypnosis. Expect to. Hypnosis is nothing but focus.
Focus on your safe space. Be there. As you enter it completely, you are in
hypnosis. As the technique's creator writes, "The deeper you go, the deeper
you're able to go, and the deeper you go, the deeper you want to go, and the
more enjoyable the experience becomes."[16]
9 Associate your safe place with a word. Once you have created and
immersed yourself in your safe place, consider giving it a name. You can
then use this name, even when not in hypnosis, to bring feelings of calm and
relaxation.[18]
Method Method 3 of 4:
3 Pre-Experiencing Rewards of a Goal
1 Choose a goal. Focus on one goal per session. Pick a goal that is
important to you and which you are anxious about achieving. Imagining
yourself accomplishing the goal and receiving the ensuing rewards can help
to build confidence and provide the incentive to reach your goal.[19] The Best
Me technique can enhance performance geared towards many goals,
including:
• Academics
• Singing
• Dancing
• Athletics / getting in shape
• Creative writing
• Getting in shape
• Starting your business / achieving a work goal
• Losing weight or quitting smoking
2 Recreate the successful accomplishment of your goal using the Best
Me steps. From within your safe place, you will now imagine in detail the
accomplishment of your goal. The more detailed your scenario, and the more
steps it involves, the better.[20]
• Increase the incentive value of your recreation by imagining further
rewards associated with your goal, like the vacation you will take
afterwards.
• Consider pre-experiencing the rewards of sub-goals as well. For instance,
if quitting smoking, you might imagine the dinner you will treat yourself to
after one week, or a conversation where you proudly tell a friend you have
not smoked for a month.
4 Feel the satisfaction and pride of achieving your goal. Think of the
admiring looks from friends and relatives. Think of what they will say to
you. Imagine how proud and happy you will feel. Allow yourself to fully
experience these emotions.[22]
Method Method 4 of 4:
4 Re-Creating Past Moods to Improve Confidence
3 Experience the emotion. As you allow yourself to sink into the scene
you have created, you will re-experience the emotion. Let yourself feel it
again as you relive the moment.[25]
6 Associate the good feeling with a word. Once you have recreated this
experience, think of a word that describes it. Focus on that word while you
recall the scene and the feelings it creates. In the future, you will be able to
use this word to bring those feelings back when you need them.[27]
Tips
• You may not achieve the deep state of focus you are seeking the first time, or
initially have success with pre-experiencing goals or re-experiencing
emotions. Keep trying. Like any skill, the Best Me technique takes practice.
• In addition to the Best Me technique, you may want to consider seeking the
services of a psychologist, counselor, or clinical social worker to help you sort
out your goals, deal with anxiety, and develop confidence.[28]
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References
1. https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/two-minute-shrink/201004/hypnosis-
underused-technique
2. http://life.gaiam.com/article/how-position-your-body-meditation
3. http://www.the-secret-of-mindpower-and-nlp.com/how-to-do-self-hypnosis.html
4. http://life.gaiam.com/article/how-position-your-body-meditation
5. http://www.the-secret-of-mindpower-and-nlp.com/how-to-do-self-hypnosis.html
6. http://link.springer.com/book/10.1007/978-1-4684-3581-8?no-access=true
7. Julia Lyubchenko, MS, MA. Certified Hypnotherapist. Expert Interview. 29 April
2020.
8. http://www.calmclinic.com/anxiety/treatment/visualization
9. Julia Lyubchenko, MS, MA. Certified Hypnotherapist. Expert Interview. 29 April
2020.
10. http://www.dbtselfhelp.com/ImagerySelfHelp.pdf
11. Julia Lyubchenko, MS, MA. Certified Hypnotherapist. Expert Interview. 29 April
2020.
12. http://link.springer.com/book/10.1007/978-1-4684-3581-8?no-access=true
13. http://www.dbtselfhelp.com/ImagerySelfHelp.pdf
14. Julia Lyubchenko, MS, MA. Certified Hypnotherapist. Expert Interview. 29 April
2020.
15. http://link.springer.com/book/10.1007/978-1-4684-3581-8?no-access=true
16. http://link.springer.com/book/10.1007/978-1-4684-3581-8?no-access=true
17. http://link.springer.com/book/10.1007/978-1-4684-3581-8?no-access=true
18. http://www.dbtselfhelp.com/ImagerySelfHelp.pdf
19. http://link.springer.com/book/10.1007/978-1-4684-3581-8?no-access=true
20. http://link.springer.com/book/10.1007/978-1-4684-3581-8?no-access=true
21. http://www.dbtselfhelp.com/ImagerySelfHelp.pdf
22. http://link.springer.com/book/10.1007/978-1-4684-3581-8?no-access=true
23. http://link.springer.com/book/10.1007/978-1-4684-3581-8?no-access=true
24. http://link.springer.com/book/10.1007/978-1-4684-3581-8?no-access=true
25. http://www.dbtselfhelp.com/ImagerySelfHelp.pdf
26. http://www.dbtselfhelp.com/ImagerySelfHelp.pdf
27. http://www.dbtselfhelp.com/ImagerySelfHelp.pdf
28. Julia Lyubchenko, MS, MA. Certified Hypnotherapist. Expert Interview. 29 April
2020.
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