Speak and Write

with Confidence
Advancing English communication skills
for the 21st century
EEI-American English
Session 5
The 4CS in Writing
Write More Clearly and Concisely
1 Use definite, specific, concrete language
 numbers
 dates and time
 places
 names
Anticipate and answer Wh and H questions

2.Use familiar, simple words

3. Use lists, bullets, numbered items

4. Use consistent subjects, pronouns,
tenses, etc
5. Use verbs instead of nouns
6. Be direct: use active voice
7. Cut unnecessary words and ideas
Improve these for clarity and conciseness

We will have a meeting tomorrow.

She made the payment about two weeks ago.

We came to an agreement about the contract at

the meeting.
The bank performed an analysis of the loan
application.
The loan has a requirement of 50% collateral
from the applicant.

Melanie explained the proposal to Joy, but she

was not happy with it.
Parallel Structure

My degree, my work experience and ability to

work under pressure make me a suitable
candidate for the job.

I can do the following:

1.Prepare proposals
2.Material purchasing
3.Filing of records
4.Processed applications
Parallelism
Mixed: The functions of the positions are:
1. To develop short and long-range plans
2. Obtaining required approvals and certifications
3. As liaison with regulatory agencies.

Parallel: The new position includes three functions:

1.
Ambiguous Language
Ambiguous:
The budget director telephoned the office manager when he
discovered an error in his estimates.

Cause:
Result:

Clear
When the budget director discovered an error in the office
manager’s estimates, he telephoned the office manager.
Abstract VS Concrete Language
The choice of appropriate
safety gears lies within the
engineer.
Zombie Nouns
Subject
Action
Object

The engineer chooses the appropriate safety gears.

Abstract VS Concrete Language
His experience in the
field of transportation
includes two years as a
clerk for the Santa Ana
The engineer has a lot of Fe and almost three
transportation experience. years as a dispatcher
for Yellow Freight
Lines.
Parallelism
Mixed: His current job as a captain is exciting and a challenge.

Parallel: His current job as a director is exciting and challenging.

Mixed: Because of the ship strike and because shortages have

developed, we can supply only one-third of the order.
Avoiding Redundancy
Avoiding Prepositional Phrase
Write Courteously and Confidently
1 Use standard sentence heads for routine
business tasks (direct and positive)

• Requesting (information or action)

• Giving (information or action)
• Accepting, agreeing, approving
• Suggesting, advising, recommending
• Complaining
• Apologizing

2 Use indirect language for negative statements,

bad news, etc
Requesting information or action

■ I’d like to…

I’d like to ask for the schedule of the training this June.
I’d like to ask you for a meeting on June 4th, at 10am.
I’d like to ask you to vote on your choice of influencer.
I’d like to request a meeting on June 4, 10 am.
I’d like to request the schedule for the training.
I’d like to request that you come early to the meeting.
Requesting information or action

■ Could I/we/you…
■ Could I get the dates, time and venue of the training this
June?
■ Could I meet with you on Wed, June 22, at 2pm to discuss…?
■ Could you send me the schedule for the training this June?
■ Could you give me the schedule for the training this June?
■ Could we meet on Wednesday
■ Could we sit down and finalize the training schedule on Wed,
June 22 at 2pm?

More courteous but weaker:

Would you tell me/send me…
I’d appreciate it /I’d appreciate if…
Would you mind sending me
Giving information / action

We’re/I’m pleased to let you know that

We’re/I’m happy to send/give you the schedule
Here’s the schedule you requested…
Please find/see below/attached the…
Accepting, Agreeing, Confirming, Approving

We’re happy/pleased to accept your payment of ….

I’m happy to confirm the schedule…
We’re delighted to agree to the terms…
I’m writing to confirm/agree/accept/approve
Suggesting, Advising
Recommending

I’d like to suggest

I’m writing to suggest that
I’m happy/pleased to recommend
Refusing, Rejecting, Giving bad news
Regrettably, we have to decline the offer/ invitation/
proposal/application/etc…

I’m afraid your sales performance is below par. This month’ s

figures show that you haven’t met your targets.

Unfortunately, we are unable to approve the request because of

our reimbursement policy.

Note: When giving bad news, it’s

often better to use more
indirect language
 The better way is…
• If you reexamine the statement, I believe you will find that
the balance shown is correct.
• We don’t make mistakes with our statements for we double
check them.
--------------------------------
• May I suggest 11 o’clock for your appointment, with Engr.
Mills?
• I’m sorry, I can’t schedule an appointment that time.

--------------------------------
• The reason we shipped the wrong cargo is that we couldn’t
understand your handwriting.
• Please write in print the information clearly and legibly to
ensure successful shipment of your cargo.
Complaining
I’m writing to complain about a delayed delivery…
I’d like to complain about an error in my account statement…
This is to let you know that an error has been made in…
I’m afraid there’s been a delay…

There’s no need to show

anger when complaining.

Directness and clarity

is enough.
Apologizing
We’re/I’m very sorry about/for…
Apologies for the delay/misunderstanding.
Please accept our sincere apology/apologies for the
delay…
I’d like to apologize for…
Give quick and general reasons only for errors or
inability to comply with requests

Unfortunately, we had a network outage due to the storm

Regrettably, there was a delay in payment processing.
Improve these for courtesy and confidence
I need those documents ASAP.

Finish the report by tomorrow.

You need to pay your bill or we have no choice but to cut off your
service.

You didn’t read the instructions carefully, so your system shut

down.

All reports must be submitted to me at the end of each month.

I can’t help you on this matter.

This is to remind everyone of the observance of official work

hours. Failure to comply will be met with sanctions.

Smoking will no longer be permitted in the building.

 Improve this email
From Carolyn James
To: Albert Gleason
Subject: I need some information on your portable printer.

Dear Mr. Gleason,

Our account representatives are very busy people – often spending as much as half of
their time travelling to consult with various clients around the world. Obviously, they
make heavy use of their laptop computers when travelling, often tapping into our
company database to prepare a proposal for a client. Some of our representatives have
requested that we provide them with a portable printer so that they can prepare hard
copies immediately for their clients. Therefore, I would like some information on your
portable printers, specifically HB-340. First, I’d like to know if this is a laser printer. Our
reps would also need a battery-operated model because they print out legal-size forms
while travelling.
If I can provide any further information about our printing needs, do not hesitate to call
me.

Sincerely,

Carolyn James
Points for editing exercise
■ Subject line
■ Concise – delete first part
■ Spacing/block style
■ State the purpose at the beginning
■ Email flows well
■ No grammatical mistakes
■ Next step/when to send the information
■ Signature block
■ Give contact information
■ Includes all necessary information

27
 Improved email
Dear Mr. Gleason,

Our company would like some information regarding the HB-340 portable
printer.
I would appreciate it if you could provide answers to the following questions:
• Is it a laser printer?
• Is it battery operated?
• Can it print out legal-size documents?
It would be great if you can send the information by Friday, February 22, as
I will need to discuss this with my supervisor.
If you have any questions, please contact me at 867-5309

Sincerely,
Carolyn James
(signature block)
Building
Grammatical Competence
in Writing
Adjective or Adverb ?
1. Speak (soft, softly) or don’t speak at all.
2. You must send payments (regular, regularly).
3. He can speak (good, well).
4. Dennis plays tennis as (good, well) as Bruce.
5. We deal with clients on a (strict, strictly) cash basis.

6. You can see the mountains _____ with these binoculars. (clear)
7. When you’re a parent, you’ll think _____ about children. (different)
8. I feel ____ enough to go out at night. (safe)
9. Her perfume smells _____. (terrible)
10. I felt ____ (bad) about not having done _____ (good) in the exams.
 Subject + Verb Agreement

1. Everyone (is, are) here.

2. A few people (is, are) late.
3. The information you sent (is, are) very useful.
4. My pants (is, are) too tight.
4. None of the customers (is, are) willing to wait.
5. None of the work he did (is, are) acceptable.
6. One of the boxes (is, are) labelled “fragile”.
7. Lisa, along with her friends, (has, have) dinner here
often.
8. The team (deal, deals) with failure calmly.
9. The team (tend, tends) to fight among themselves.
10. Susan is a woman who (think, thinks) like a leader.
11. Susan is one of the women who (think, thinks) like a
leader.
 Count and Non-Count Nouns
1. I have a lot of (paperwork, paperworks) to process.
2. We only use recycled (paper, papers) at the office.
3. I left some important (paper, papers) at the office.
4. Can I have some (water, waters), please?
5. Foreign ships can’t enter the country’s territorial (water, waters).
6. We get little (information, informations) from the government.
7. Her house has some fine (furniture, furnitures).
8. The workers loaded the (equipment, equipments) in the truck.
9. The manager is excellent at giving (advice, advices) to her staff.
10. The (staff, staffs) here at American English are nice and friendly.
Quantifiers

A few employees signed the petition for a four-day work week.

Few employees signed the petition for a four-day work week.

(emphasizing only a small number)
Quite a few employees signed the petition for a four-day work
week.
(a large number)

1.He studied hard for the test so he made (few, a few) errors.
2.He didn’t know the route so he made (few, a few) wrong turns.
 Find and correct the s-ending
errors in the following invitation
Corro Communications are pleased to announce the promotion of
August Samuels to assistant vice president of marketing. The former
advertising director of our South and Midwest divisions bring to her
new job a wealth of dedication and experience.

Ms. Samuels new office will be located in the New York Headquarters
building at 1 Sixth Avenue.

To mark the occasion, Corro request the pleasure of your company at

a reception honoring Ms. Samuel. The reception will be held on May 24
at 4:30 P.M. in the Executive Lounge of the headquarters building.

R.S.V.P.
David Nathan

34
Writing Good Sentences
 Simple and Compound Sentences
Clause = noun phrase + verb phrase

The children + are playing.

I + will go.

Simple Sentence = 1 clause

The loan was approved.

All the participants are learning English.
Lito and Jenna will review your financial statements tomorrow.
I enjoyed
The company’s stock pricethe
rosemovie.
in the stock market yesterday.

Compound Sentence = 2 clauses or more (joined by and, or, nor, but, so, then, yet)
I shouted and everybody waved.

Turn these simple sentences into one compound sentence.

We arrived early. We had breakfast downstairs.
We arrived late. We tried to take the elevator up. The elevator didn’t
work.
Turning Simple to Compound Sentences

I enjoyed the movie. It was very interesting.

Using only simple
We looked everywhere. We didn’t find him.
sentences makes your
writing look amateurish
They are coming by car. They should be here and tedious.
soon.
Use a combination of
He left the house early. He got to work late.
simple and compound
We ordered 30 boxes. They delivered 25 boxes.sentences

Use compound
sentences
 Complex Sentences
Complex sentence = 2 clauses (or more)
= 1 main clause + 1 or more adverbial clause
 ADVERBIAL CLAUSES COMMON CONJUNCTIONS
Contrast clauses although; though; even though; while;
Reason clauses because; since; as
Place clauses where; wherever; everywhere
Purpose clauses so that; so; because + want
Result clauses so that; so … that; such … that
when; before; after; since; while; as; as
Time clauses
soon as; by the time; until
Conditional clauses  if; unless; provided (that); as long as

Examples:
Her father died when she was very young.
She had a difficult childhood because her father died when she was very young.
Although she has always lived in France, she speaks fluent English because her
mother was American and her father was Canadian.
 Put the right conjunctions in the
blanks.
By the time wherever provided that so
Since so that While the way

1. ________________ I am, I always think of you.

2. I’ll go _____________ I can sit in front.
3. I like _____________ she sings.
4. She never leaves home without her phone, ______ she can be
reached anytime.
5. ______________ I get to New York, he’ll be gone.
6. ______________ I have nothing to say, I’ll remain silent.
7. It rained ____________ much ____________ the streets were
soon flooded.
8. ___________ pandas may look cute, they don’t make very
good pets.
The Writing Process

4
5
3
2
1
What do you think of the following email?

A Message from DFLO Entertainment Events Group

Hello,
This message is to inform you that we, unfortunately,
have to cancel this year’s Corgi Festival.

Regards,
DFLO
Five-Step Writing Process
• Know your audience
– Above or below in rank?
– One or many? (primary and secondary audiences)
– What is my relationship with the audience?
– What is the most likely reaction? (effect, expectations)
– Cultural norms/etiquette

• Understand your purpose

– What do I want to achieve?
– What do I need to say to achieve it (content)?
– How do I convey this content best? (form, style, tone)?

• Drafting (inc. making an outline)

• Revising (can include feedback gathering)
• Formatting and Proofreading
The Writing Process
1. Analyze your audience Steps 1 and 2 very
- internal/external? rank? one or many? important to decide on
knowledge? relationship? likely reaction? a.content and
cultural norms? emphasis
2. Understand your purpose
b.style
- inform, request, persuade, command, •approach
express feeling/opinion, socialize? •tone
•formality
3. Draft –
•outline if needed
4. Revise – go back to 1 and 2; revise
•write easy parts first for content, style, 4 Cs
•don’t edit much
5. Format, Proofread
•avoid perfectionist eye -Font styles, pagination,
What do I need to say to achieve my heading/subheadings,
alignment
numbering/bulleting,

purpose? -Spelling, punctuation, grammar and so on

How do I say it best for my audience?