Difference

Between
Men and Women
SENSE OF SELF
• Man’s sense of self is defined through his ability to achieve
results.
• To offer a man unsolicited advice is to presume that he
doesn't know what to do or that he can’t do it on his own.
Generally speaking, when a woman offers unsolicited
advice or tries to “help” a man, she has no idea of how
critical and unloving she may sound to him.
• A woman’s sense of self is defined through her feelings and
the quality of her feelings and the quality of her
relationship. A woman being able to share all her feelings
to her husband will be contented and satisfied. But a man
thinking of helping interrupts this stress releasing activity
of a woman by offering immediate solution to her problem.
COPING WITH STRESS
• To feel better Men go to their caves to solve problem
alone.
• To feel better Women get together an openly talk about
their problems.
• A woman under stress is not immediately concerned with
finding solutions to her problems but rather seeks relief by
expressing herself and being understood. At times, to
forget her own painful feelings, a woman may become
emotionally involved in the problems of others.
• Just as a man is fulfilled through working out the intricate
details of solving a problem, a woman is fulfilled through
talking about the details of her problems.
WAYS OF MOTIVATING
• Men are motivated and empowered when they feel needed
and women are motivated and empowered when they feel
cherished. Therefore not to be needed is a slow death for
men.
• A man’s deepest fear is that he is not good enough or that
he is incompetent. Therefore it is difficult for a man to
listen to a woman when she is unhappy or disappointed
because he feels like a failure.
• Just as women are afraid of receiving, men are afraid of
giving.
SPEAKING DIFFERENT LANGUAGES
• Both men & women languages have the same words, but
the way they were used gave different meanings.
• To fully express their feelings, women assume poetic
license to use various superlatives, metaphors and
generalizations.
• The number one complaint of women in a relationship is:
“I don’t feel heard! But men misunderstood even this
complaint.
• The biggest challenge for women is correctly to interpret
and support a man when he isn’t talking.
MAN INTIMACY CYCLE
• When man loves a woman periodically he needs to pull
away before he can get closer. They are like rubber
bands. At times they need to pull away again to regain
back their sense of autonomy and independence.
• When a man physically pulls himself away, she physically
follows him.
• When a man emotionally pulls himself away, she
emotionally follows him more. She may also try to pull him
back mentally by asking him guilt-inducing questions.
MOOD OF WOMEN
• A woman’s self-esteem rises and falls like a wave. When
she hits bottom, it is a time for emotional housecleaning.
• In relationships, men pull back and then get close, while
women rise and fall in their ability to love themselves and
others.
• Even when a man is succeeding in supporting a woman,
she may become even more upset. The negative feelings
of women should not be suppressed otherwise the positive
feelings become suppressed as well.
• Men argue for the right to be free while women argue for
the right to be upset. Men want space while women want
understanding. Therefore by supporting her need to be
heard, she could support his need to be free.
EMOTIONAL NEEDS
• Fulfilling a primary need is required before one is
able fully to receive and appreciate the other kinds
of love.
• A woman needs care and a man needs trust.
• She needs understanding and he needs acceptance.
• She needs respect and he need appreciation.
• She needs devotion and he needs admiration.
• She needs validation and he needs approval.
• She needs reassurances and he needs
encouragement.