What makes us tick?

Questioning Hugh Mackay on what makes us tick

By Simon Smart
ABC Religion and Ethics 27 Oct 2010

Mackay's latest book, What Makes Us Tick? - the Ten Desires that Drive Us, represents
something of an extended collective session on the therapist's couch, learning of
the things that lie at the root of what we do. As far as therapy goes, the experience is
enlightening, and, I dare say, a whole lot cheaper than the real thing.
Mackay is a deft hand at describing the major shifts in our culture, and the impact these changes
have on individual lives and communities. For years we have been turning to him to make sense
of our own behaviour, along with that of our aging parents and that odd looking teenager on the
bus with the piercings and tattoos.

1. Go to What Makes Us Tick? identifies ten key "social desires" linked to personality, identity,
relationships, and that influence our approaches to love and friendship, family, work, and
community. Even a glance at the chapter titles reveals subjects that immediately resonate, like

http://www.abc.net.au/religion/articles/2010/
the desire to belong, the desire to connect, the desire for love, and the desire for control.
And while they are dealt with individually here, Mackay is clear that these desires are intertwined
and intricately related. The frustration of one can lead to overcompensation in another.

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Mackay's descriptions inevitably lead us to recognise ourselves in the pages along with those with
whom we live and work and play. For each desire, he identifies a shadow - the dark side of desire
that if overplayed or left unchecked can lead to damage to ourselves and to others. The desire for

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"my place" for instance, is frequently expressed as territorialism that Mackay says must be
"tempered with generosity and compassion" if a civilised society is to be maintained.

There is much Mackay wisdom to be shared here - well researched with a touch of the
grandfatherly fireside chat. He has something to say about the contemporary hunger for
community and he urges planners and governments to create places and spaces that encourage
human interactions.

He offers a sober assessment (Mackay is no Luddite) of technology and the online world. He
speaks of a three-fold need of connection - with our inner selves, with others, and the natural
world - each of which may suffer when we allow the virtual to replace the physical.

2. Read the document and come up with five (5) He urges us to find creative expression in the arts as a means of connecting with "who you are."
He is at pains to illuminate the danger of focusing on happiness above wholeness. Mackay thinks
that when people talk about wanting to be happy they are thinking of a more narrow and vacuous

important points to answer the question in

feeling related to the desire for control.

He urges parents to wish for something more substantial for their kids than happiness, and he
quotes F. Scott Fitzgerald, "The redeeming things are not 'happiness and pleasure,' but the

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deeper satisfactions that come out of struggle."

Those charged with giving an account of the phenomenon of human behaviour can sometimes
describe humanity like they would a passing parade viewed from a balcony safe above the throng.
Their observations are those of detached objectivity, but the dignity and individuality of the lives

3. Now for a movie…

they describe can be missing. No such charge could be made of Mackay.

He clearly has a deep respect and warmth for his subjects. Mackay thinks that all people are
"endlessly fascinating" and that there is much to learn from offering the gift of attentive listening.
It's a gift that he has clearly given to many over the course of a long career.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9EUUQ0zIAQ
The desire for love, says Mackay, is the deepest of all our desires that when freely given offers the
most enduring contribution to a better world. He doesn't hide the allusions to 1 Corinthians 13
when he writes that love is about action as much as feeling and true love seeks no recognition or