How to do your first meeting

Steve Elzinga
Coaching is not …
1. Pastoral Care = general care offered by Pastor
and/or staff
2. Counseling = a more professional, specific
care offered by Pastor or Counseling staff
3. Teaching/training/discipling = helping people
learn how to do something.
4. Mentoring = a process of helping someone
acquire skills, attitudes, behaviors already
mastered by the mentor
Coaching includes …
1. Caring (like pastoral care) but more about
challenge than comfort
2. Care to a specific need (like counseling) but is
more about the future than the past
Coaching includes …
3. Teaching/training/discipling but is more
about helping the client teach themselves
than the coach teaching the client
4. Mentoring but is less about the client
becoming like the mentor and more about
the client becoming what he or she could
become with a little bit of help
Other thoughts on Coaching:
1. Coaching is about action, not understanding
2. Coaching is client directed, not teacher
directed
3. Coaching is not about getting the client to do
what the coach wants but what the client
wants
4. Coaching is not about motivating the client; it
is helping the client motivate themselves.
Pre-requisites to coaching
1. Saving connection to Jesus
2. Receive the gift of the Holy Spirit
3. A walk with God
4. Part of the Church
5. Engaged in the 7 Connections
Client has to be willing to take
responsibility
1. Set up appointments
2. Make all the connections (appointments,
phone calls, text, message)
3. Be on time
4. Engage in the process
Client has to be willing to make the
process a priority
1. Appointments
2. Action steps
Client must be willing to pay for the
coaches time
 Introduce Coaching Models
Introduce the client to the Coaching models
matrix
Start without models; use simple questions

Three things coaches do:

1. Help client figure out what they want to do
(decision)
2. Help client figure out how to do what they
want to do (plan)
3. Help client do what they plan to do
(management)
 Help client figure out what they want to
do (decision)

1. Where in your life do you think it would be

helpful to have a coach? Where in your life
are you hurting? Where in your life would
you like to see some improvement?
2. Of all the answers that you came up with to
the above questions, which would you like to
focus on?
3. What action goal might come out of this?
Help client figure out how to do what they
want to do (plan)

1. What action steps would you like to take

toward reaching your desired goal?
2. What might be the first step?
 Help client do what they plan to do
(management)

What action step that you believe will help you

move toward your stated goal can hold you
accountable for our next meeting?