Poor Academic Report (400 words)
Title: Why the Environment Is Important
The environment is very important and we should take care of
it. It gives us trees and air and water and animals and plants
and more. If we don’t have the environment then we will not
live. That is why it is important to care for the environment
every day and also tell other people to care for it too.
There are many things in the environment. Like trees and
oceans and the sky and everything we see outside. It is all
part of the world and the Earth. Some people pollute the
environment and this is very bad because it makes things
dirty and animals die. So we should not throw garbage and
plastic on the floor or the water. Pollution is really really bad
and people need to stop polluting now.
One reason the environment is good is because it has food for
us. We eat fruits and vegetables and also meat from animals.
These all come from the environment. So if we don’t take care
of the environment then we will not have food to eat and that
is bad. We also need water to drink and it comes from the
environment and water is very important.
Another thing is the weather. Weather is changing a lot and
now it is hot and cold and sometimes it rains too much. This is
because people are not being nice to the Earth. Climate
change is something that is happening because of pollution
and the ozone and the factories and cars. If people stop doing
these things then the weather will be good again.
In conclusion, the environment is really really important. We
need to save it by not throwing garbage and by recycling and
also planting trees. Everyone should care about the
environment because it is where we live and we need it.
🔍 Evaluation Annotations and Comments
Category Evaluation
◻ Lacks depth. Repeats simple ideas without expansion. Claims like
Content “weather will be good again” are over-simplified. No evidence,
examples, or statistics.
◻ Weak paragraphing. Poor transitions between ideas. No logical
Structure
development from one paragraph to the next.
◻ Very basic and repetitive. Words like "good," "bad," and
Vocabulary "important" are overused. No subject-specific or formal vocabulary.
◻ Frequent repetition and simple syntax. Sentences often begin the
Grammar &
same way. Overuse of "and." Phrasing like “really really bad” is
Sentence Structure
informal and childish.
◻ Too casual for academic writing. Tone is not suitable for a formal
Style & Tone report. Use of phrases like “this is bad” or “really really important”
lacks academic precision.
Spelling and ◻ Mostly correct spelling, but sentence boundaries and punctuation
Punctuation are poorly managed. Some run-on sentences and comma splices.
✅ Teacher's Advice to Students:
To meet IGCSE 0500 standards, you should:
Avoid repeating simple ideas.
Use formal, precise language appropriate for a report.
Support your points with reasoning or facts.
Vary your sentence structures and vocabulary.
Organize your report with a clear introduction, developed body, and insightful
conclusion.
📝
Report (Summary of Issues)
"The environment is very important and we should take care of it..."
(Full 400-word version reviewed earlier)
📊 Full Evaluation by
Criteria
1. Content & Relevance
Grade: E (Below Standard)
🔴 Issues:
Repeats simplistic ideas like "The environment is important" and "pollution is bad."
Lacks supporting detail, explanation, or examples.
Fails to develop arguments logically or convincingly.
Doesn't consider different perspectives or real-world context.
✅ Improvements:
Add factual support (e.g. data on pollution, deforestation, climate change).
Include examples: "Pollution in oceans kills marine life such as turtles that eat plastic
bags."
Discuss why these environmental issues matter—go deeper than just “it’s bad.”
2. Structure & Organisation
Grade: D (Weak)
🔴 Issues:
Introduction is vague and lacks a clear thesis.
Paragraphs are not clearly focused; topics jump around.
No logical progression between points.
The conclusion just repeats earlier points.
✅ Improvements:
Write a strong introduction that outlines the focus of the report.
Group ideas into clear paragraphs:
o Introduction
o Why the environment is important
o Threats to the environment
o Solutions to protect it
o Conclusion
Use linking words: “Moreover,” “For example,” “As a result,” “Therefore.”
3. Language Use & Style
Grade: E (Inappropriate)
🔴 Issues:
Informal tone ("really really bad", "we need to stop polluting now").
Overused and vague words: “good,” “bad,” “important.”
Lacks academic or topic-specific vocabulary.
✅ Improvements:
Use formal language suitable for academic writing.
o Instead of “bad,” use “harmful,” “damaging,” or “detrimental.”
o Replace “really really important” with “crucial” or “essential.”
Add varied sentence structures: Use complex and compound sentences.
Avoid contractions: use “do not” instead of “don’t.”
4. Grammar, Spelling & Punctuation
Grade: D (Inconsistent)
🔴 Issues:
Run-on sentences and sentence fragments ("Like trees and oceans and the sky...").
Informal or incorrect punctuation.
Repetition of sentence starters ("So...", "We...").
✅ Improvements:
Combine short sentences to avoid choppiness.
Correct grammatical errors:
o "its boring" → "it's boring"
o "makes things dirty and animals die" → "makes the environment unsanitary
and leads to the death of animals"
Use a variety of sentence openers and punctuation (semi-colons, commas for
clarity).
🔚 Overall
Evaluation
Criteria Level Score (out of 40)
Content & Relevance Limited 8
Structure & Organisation Weak 7
Language (Style & Vocabulary) Basic / Informal 6
Grammar & Accuracy Inconsistent 7
Estimated Total Below Standard 28/40 (approx.)
✅ Final Recommendations for the Writer
To meet IGCSE 0500 expectations, you should:
Plan your report with clear sections and logical flow.
Expand your ideas with examples and explanations.
Use formal, academic vocabulary and avoid conversational tone.
Check grammar carefully and use varied sentence structures.
Practice summarising and concluding effectively without repeating.
Well-Written Academic Report (IGCSE 0500 Standard)
Title: Why the Environment Is Important
The environment plays a vital role in sustaining life on Earth,
yet it is increasingly under threat due to human activity. From
providing clean air and water to supporting biodiversity and
regulating climate, the environment is essential to our survival
and well-being. This report explores the importance of the
environment, the threats it faces, and the actions individuals
and governments can take to protect it.
Firstly, the environment provides natural resources that are
necessary for human life. Forests, oceans, rivers, and soil
supply us with food, water, medicine, and raw materials. Trees
absorb carbon dioxide and release oxygen, while oceans
regulate the Earth’s temperature. Without these resources, the
quality of life would significantly decline. It is therefore crucial
to maintain a balance between resource use and conservation.
However, rapid industrialisation, deforestation, pollution, and
overconsumption have caused severe damage to the natural
world. Air and water pollution have increased health problems
in urban areas, while plastic waste has devastated marine
ecosystems. Moreover, greenhouse gas emissions from
vehicles and factories are contributing to climate change,
resulting in more frequent natural disasters such as floods,
droughts, and wildfires.
To address these challenges, both individuals and
governments must take responsibility. Simple actions such
as reducing waste, recycling, and conserving water can
make a difference when widely adopted.
Governments should implement stricter environmental
regulations, invest in renewable energy sources, and
promote education about sustainability. International
cooperation is also essential, as environmental problems
are not confined by national borders.
In conclusion, the environment is not just important—it is
indispensable. It provides the resources we rely on, supports
the planet’s delicate ecosystems, and helps maintain global
stability. Protecting it requires urgent, coordinated efforts from
all levels of society. By making informed choices and
encouraging sustainable practices, we can preserve the
environment for future generations.
🟢 What This Version Does Well (According to IGCSE
0500 Criteria)
Criteria Strengths
Clearly focused, well-developed ideas with relevant examples and
Content & Relevance explanations.
Structure & Clear introduction, logically ordered body paragraphs, and a strong
Organisation conclusion.
Language & Style Formal, precise vocabulary appropriate for an academic report.
Grammar & Accuracy Accurate grammar, varied sentence structures, and correct punctuation.
