When I first discovered that Robert Pattinson was going to be on the cover of a

magazine (GQ), my reaction was the same as millions of girls I'm sure. I wanted to
not only admire the beautiful pictures (because let's face it, the boy can take a
picture) but to also read what he has to say. It's true and although I may act and
I'm sorry if I come across that way, but from what I've read which I realize isn't
always if ever accurate but from what I've read about him, is that he is one of
the most modest people in the world. The more I see, and the more I read, I see
such a brilliant mind that I don't think he even realizes he has sometimes. Such a
laid back person that is just "going with the flow" and is just living his life.
It makes me sad that he doesn't see himself as much while nearly ever girl in the
world sees him as everything. I don't know where his astounding modesty comes from
but he if anyone deserves to be successful and no I don't just mean by getting
monstrous paychecks. Success is and/or should be measured by more than just the
money you bring home. To me, he is a success and there's no doubt about it that if
it were me that was getting as much notice as he is, I would be handling it
differently. That's probably why he's the celebrity and I'm the obsessed fan. I
wonder what he's obsessed about?

When I first began reading the article in April's issue of GQ which just in case
there's some plagerism issue, was written by Alex Pappademas, I was so intrested
to read what genius things Rob Pattinson would so because he's the type of person
we like to quote. The beginning starts of with a quote from Kristen Stewart on
what she thinks of him. She says: "He can't lie. It makes things a little scary
for him sometimes. But it's my favorite thing about him." That quote got me
thinking. Who wouldn't want someone who was unable to lie or fabricate things? I
mean it's not like it's some mental disease Rob has or something that he uses to
be noticed (he just doens't seem to be that sort of person), but it's odd and rare
especially in Hollywood, but it's probably the truth. I think both Kristen and
Robert are the sort of people (again just an observation) that feel that if you
know the truth and it's not going to destroy anyone, what's the point of lying or
making into something it isn't. Just good ole fashioned, plain, ordinary truth.
It's true that some people may use the truth against you but I think that's a
small price to pay when it means getting who you are and what you think and feel
out in the world.

I think that Robert seems a bit guarded as if he's agraid of making in drastic
changes or choices because even though he hasn't done much, he sees how quick it
can all be over and I think he wants to try and use his popularity for something
good without being consummed by the evils of celebrity life. I think he's trying
to hang out to himself and stay as grounded as he can. I know I'm not an actor and
have no idea what it's like to be famous (although I must admit I'd love to be the
one that people wanted to see and talk to for a change), but it just seems like
the more famous you are, the more torn your life becomes. Everyone wants to know
everything about you, watching you every move as if you're being accused of being
a terrorist. They have to know what you're doing, what you're wearing and who
you're with at all times. That part is just annoying and think that the press go a
little just to get a picture that isn't even that good to begin with. Anyway, I'm
getting off topic.We all know or think we know that Robert Pattinson isn't your
typical celebrity (yet), simply by the way he dresses and the way he acts. Mr.
Pappademas says: "He slides into his chair, dressed all in black, with a weeks-old
beard, hair crammed under a wool cap, looking like Justin Timberlake researching
an off-Broadway turn as Terry Malloy. His clothes smell like he recently purchased
them off the back of someone less fortunate the he." I'll be honest, when I try
and think of what my reaction to this quote is, I'm at a loss for words in a way.
I mean, if we saw someone who Mr. Pappademas described, we would act like he had
the plague and more than likely stray away from him, including some dreadful
glances, but since it's Robert Pattinson he's talking about, it's a different
story. For me though I kind of feel he's making fun of him by not dressing better
and picking at that his clothes looks like he got them off a homeless man out on
the street. See if someone said that about me, I would be hurt and angry but the
funny thing about Rob that helps make him stand out from the rest of us is the he
doesn't care. I mean some of us try to act like it doesn't bother us but sooner or
later our defenses break down and we lash out at the person we can find and then
try to conform ourselves to fit the image other people have for us, Rob isn't like
that or at least he doesn't seem to be. I think he's a "you see what you get" sort
of guy. There's no pretenses with him.

In the article, Rob is quote to say that" he's always been hypersensitive about
being looked at. He's one of those tall people who hunch, trying to disappear." I
read this and my heart breaks a little. I mean when you're as brilliant and
talented as Rob Pattinson clearly is, why would you feel that way? I'm so tempted
to ask him (if I could), what happened to you to make you be so sensitive to
attention? If you don't truly believe in what you're doing, why do you do it?
Where's the motivation and drive? Then it goes on to say, "Then all this stuff
happened. He wasn't ready. His first though, whenever he finds himself in one of
these crowds, is always, Someone could very easily stab me." What kind of thought
is that? Most people would not have that sort of reaction, why does he? He is such
a fascinating person and in knowing the real Rob, having the ability to read minds
would come in handy, maybe people aren't asking the right questions.

His modesty is astounding. There is a fine line between being modest and being
overly cocky about one's abilities. Rob seems to be at the far left of the
spectrum. My question is: What put him there? Just to prove or back my thought,
Rob says, "There's literally not a single [true] story that could be written about
me, I never do anything." How could that possibily be true? I mean, I don't think
he has any sort of clue how he has touched people, both with his acting and music.
What sort of thinking is that? I'd love to ask him: If someone wanted to write the
TRUE story about you, would you let them? Even if to you, there's nothing worth
writing about or even if you could come up with something, it wouldn't be
something people would be interested in reading. He'd be so wrong. Mr. Pappademas
says, "He doesn't want to watch himself on film because he's worried he'll look
like a fraud. Even before he started acting, he says, I was constantly thinking
that I was faking my emotions. I was constantly attacking myself: You're a fake,
you're a fraud." That is such an awful thing to say about yourself. The definition
of fraud (which I got from merriam-webster.com) is a person who is not what he or
she pretends to be. What if you're trying to be who you are? What if you're simply
trying discover who the real you is and the only way you can do that is by living
life, experiencing new things and finding out how they affect you, the feelings
they cause you to feel. Robert Pattinson is 22 years old. Same age as me and my
friends. Ok now I'm not saying this applies to everyone, but honestly, how many 22
year olds know exactly, without any sort of doubt who they really are? I surely
don't. I'm trying to find out but I'm not sure and may never be. So why can't this
same uncertainty apply to someone alot more famous than me? If I got the chance, I
would say something along these lines to Rob: "you're just like the rest of us.
You're starting to figure out who you are and I think you're afraid to be labeled
something you don't want to be. Self discovery is not something that most people
stumble upon overnight. Stop beating yourself up, stop trying to cram the self-
discovery into such a short time because you're probably going to miss out on
something, on something you were intended to discover and enjoy. Slow down."

New Moon is just beginning filiming (as fas as I know) and I'm a little bummed
that Catherine Hardwick won't be dircting the second installment and feel that she
was dealt a bad hand but handled it extremely well. She paved the way for the rest
of the series, for whoever directs them. The hardest part is getting started, I
don't see why it wouldn't/couldn't apply to this. Towards the end of the article,
Hardwick says, "He's obviously ridiculously photogenic, but he's also so talented
and has so much insight. I see him creating stylized, odd, wild, fantastical
characters, like what Johnny Depp does." I totally agree with Catherine Hardwick.
Rob Pattinson just seems to be the sort of actor (if it's even possible to put him
in a category) that can't and won't repeat a character or a character that seems
to have too much in common with someone else. Forcing himself to stretch his
ability further than it was before. I guess that's something you have to think
about when you're actor, especially if you want to be a good one and in my
opinion, he already is a good one.

Although I know there is so much information and insight about who Robert
Pattinson really is, that he's guarded about but I feel like towards the end of
the article, he does give a small glimpse and I think he's clever enough to know
that he gave it on purpose. He says, "I think it'd be much worse to do a load of
sutff that's really bad. Because then you can't go into another career. If you've
made an idiot out of yourself, you're never going to be taken seriously as a
lawyer or something, if you're, like, a joke actor. The only thing I want from
anything is to not be embarrassed." Reading that I see that he takes what he does
so seriously and he is extremely careful, a little too careful maybe. He wants
what he does to be the best it can be, just in case things happen and is forced to
choose a different path. He seems to be so responisble and considering the future,
realizing that the choices he's making now will affect him for the rest of his
life. Now how many 22 year olds do you know that are that insightful? I can only
think of a selected few.

The very last thing that caught my eye that Mr. Pappademas says is, " We imagine
what it would be like if this were our life, all the time. It would drive us mad,
and we would probably live in fear of it ever stopping, because of what that would
mean." That is such a loaded statement and I honestly don't know what to say to
even begin to try and explain what I think he means. I guess having every aspect
of your life under such close scrutiny would invade you and would cause you to
lose your sense of life and therefore would cause you to go crazy ( so to speak).
Having nothing private, everything out in the open, things you're not sure you
want the world to know. For the part of having a fear of it stopping even though
you're not sure you like the idea of risking so much, I think the only explanation
I can make, is that with this fame you have the chance that so few of us get. You
get the chance to voice your opinions and thoughts with the rest of the world and
what makes it even sweeter, is that people will actually listen to what you have
to say because whether you know it or not, you have power to make a difference and
I guess you could be afraid that if you had that power and lost it, everything you
might have been trying to do, to better both your life and the lives of those
around you would be gone. No longer a possibilty. How devestating that would be.

Just be having written this which people won't read ( my own Robert Pattinson
additude), I feel like I have gained a better insight to what and who Robert
Pattinson really is. Don't get misunderstand me, it's probably safe to say that Im
way off on some things I've said and thought but hey no one's perfect, well maybe
one person. The name Edward Cullen comes to mind.