Recognise your negative

thinking patterns
Do you automatically think "I'm useless” if you do
something wrong, or assume that if your neighbour
ignores you, she must hate you?

These distorted thoughts can really take their toll on

your self-esteem. Below is a list of 10 negative ways
of thinking, if you can recognise yourself having these
thoughts then you can begin the process of rationalising
them.

1. Personalisation

Even though it’s largely out of your control you blame yourself for a
negative event that occurred 'If I had taken more care, I never would have
lost my mobile phone.'

2. Filtering

One negative happening, such as a rude comment made to you during an

otherwise enjoyable evening changes your whole perspective on the
evening and puts you on a downer

3. Rejecting praise

Closing off the positive such as a compliment, affectionate gesture or

praise goes unnoticed, ignored or deflected; you might reply with, 'It’s no
big deal.'

4. Drawing false conclusions

You draw negative conclusions without getting your facts straight. You try
and predict the future or guess what someone else is feeling 'My sister is
upset, she must be angry with me.'

5. Negative reasoning

You are sure that your negative opinion of a situation reflects reality. Such
as: 'My husband drops his socks on the floor just to aggravate me.'
6. Using the word 'should' in your vocabulary

You adhere to being a perfectionist and following certain rules about what
you 'should' be doing. You feel useless and guilty when you can’t stick to
your rules.

7. Overgeneralisation

One negative event, such as an insult from your partner or an argument

with someone causes you to exaggerate the situation. For example, you
might think, 'She’s always cold' or 'You can’t trust anyone.'

8. Labelling

Rather than learning from a mistake and using it as an experience that

has helped you grow as a person, you label yourself negatively: 'I’m a
failure.' You do the same to other people too: 'She’s so controlling.'

9. Magnification or minimisation

You wind yourself up so that molehill problems become mountains 'I know
I won’t be any good at it.' Or you minimize anything that might make you
feel good, such as appreciation for a kind act you did or the recognition
that other people have flaws, too.

10. All or nothing

If you don’t perform with perfection, then you consider yourself a

complete failure.

Conclusion

Negative thoughts don’t have to be a way of life, you can 'unlearn' self-
defeating ways of thinking that pave the way toward mood disorders.

Writing things down on paper really helps. Take some time out of your day
to write down a negative event, notice your thought pattern from the list
above and look at then write down a different perspective with a more
rational and optimistic response.

Just the act of writing gives you back some power and control over the
situation and once you have recognised your negative thought pattern
you are on the way to teaching yourself new patterns, positive ones!