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Bernardo Alvarez English 100 Ms Gomez-Rivas October 10, 2013 Educational Experience Learning doesnt begin when you step into a class! It begins when you wake up in the morning. Your walk to school can make a bigger impact on your life than 1 week of school. Education is not something that you can physically measure; its an experience unique to an individual. For many education means college, thats what it meant for me. My father who never had the guidance of his parents only went to the 3rd grade then dropped out of school, came to the US at the age of 13 to work the fields. He saw racism and the struggle fast forward 30 years of blood sweat and tears he is living the American dream, now as a naturalized citizen he has a house, cars, 3 kids, was making over 100,000 before the economy crashed , not once did he tell us education was not important. My parents never pushed us to be a doctor; lawyer, CEOs but we were going to college no questions about that. Hard work will bring money in, but how do you want to make it? With a hammer or a pencil? my father told me and my sister when my brother graduated from UCSC, to have him as an example. I was a sophomore, I did ok but I was already not on my brothers 4.0 path. No, I am on my own educational path and will have a different story, like everyone will have, because no one is the same but we can all relate coming from the same system, we will all have our good times, bad times, and things we expect to gain from an education.. We hear stories from the freedom writes, biographies wee study in class, and theories we learn on our own to build these connections within our educational experiences. School is where we entrust our education.

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In the case of Erin Gruwells The Freedom Writers we follow a teachers struggle to turn remedial level student believed to be a lost cause to the most academically excited students. Beginning her career in what she thinks is her beautiful gated community she soon discovers that the Long Beach was what the media ha hyped it up to be the Hood. I can see a lot of my own community with these students, one student in particular reminded me of myself, Ms. Gruwell one kid even turns in his homework wadded in a ball because hed get beat up for caring a folder.(entry 2 pg30) this reminded me of 7th grade I got involved in a bad crowed and would constantly get made fun of called school boy because I was smart and actually paid attention in class, while the others were being sent to the office. I did not care I left and when I did I would get a lot of threats from the people that were my friends I was always tall and well fed so they werent intimidating me when I would see them in the hall or street, but I wouldnt walk through where they hung out any more. The students show no interest in reading, many of them asks why they read about people that live hundreds of years ago and live in what seems to be a different world. We read Romeo and Juliet like Ms Gruwells class and I personally thought that this was the biggest waste of time, learning this when we are 15. Not many 15 year old boys are looking for true love, however I failed to see the true meaning behind Romeo and Juliet. I missed the point, giving up on these stories before I gave them a chance. English has been an enemy of mine ever since 4th grade when I wrote to the class a story about my dog that had just died. I poured my heart out to my classmates and they understood I ended my touching essay with my mom helped me threw it the teacher instead of explaining to me to me decided to ask me out loud if my mom had help me throw away my dog my dog, then tittered to herself. This, after I had just put myself in a venerable position and the class was

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supportive she made that comment and everybody laughed. From this point on I didnt care about reading or writing any more, I didnt even want to learn or get better if I didnt need it. I just wanted to be able to speak out my essays for the rest of my life. But that wasnt good for my growth and eventually I had to move on and was pretty good at reading, I learned to enjoy it but still not writing, even know you will notice my writing is horrible but I am trying to improve. In order for us to grow we must be in a place where we think we are comfortable. Sometimes parents dont see this side of their problems, but the problems in the house dont stay in the house these problems stay in our minds as students. According to Neele burton M.D. healthy human beings have a certain number of needs, and that these needs are arranged in a hierarchy, with some needs (such as physiological and safety needs) being more primitive or basic than others (such as social and ego needs). Maslows so-called hierarchy of needs is often presented as a five-level pyramid, with higher needs coming into focus only once lower, more basic needs are met. This idea of Maslows Hierarchy of Needs says that in order for a person to look for self-fulfillment they must first meet certain requirements set. I know this is true; this is the way people are wired from evolution people need to survive before we thrive. Some students in Ms Gruwell's class have to take 2 busses to get to Wilson High School. Im lucky enough to have my bills paid and have food set on my table from my parents so I am able to also take 2 busses to Pasadena . I know my parents financial and mental stability doesnt rely that much on me so I dont have to be at home or help pay the bills, so I can take a 2 hr. bus ride to Pasadena City College. In order for a student to get good grades he must first have a home, nourishment, and feel that his survival isnt in danger. But went I did well in elementary it might have also been hurting me.

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When I was in elementary school my brother was in high school. My brother, an undocumented student was getting a 4.0 and had already been accepted to USC and UCSC had a bright future. My parents having another two kids in elementary, me and my sister, where expecting so much from their US born children. My sister was struggling in elementary school but I was exceling and had various offers to skip ahead a grade, held back because my mother did not want me to think I was better than my sister. They would always tell me that I was so brilliant that I was smarter than my brother that I just needed to show the same hard work and dedication that my brother had. Carol Dweck believes that talent doesnt make a person grate it is a persons mindset as soon as anything went wrong, Beane lost it. He didnt know how to learn from his mistakes, nor did he learn how to practice or improve. Why? Because naturals shouldnt make mistakes or need to practice. I however like a challenge I liked to show people how smart I am and how I can pass my classes with very little effort. I got As and Bs and when out of middle school with a 3.6. so when I started high school my brother graduated the summer for junior year he told me, you were so smart so gifted I know you are smarter than me in the sense that you can learn and understand and comprehend faster than me even now. But I see no drive in you, are going through school like whatever. Like you just want to finish high school. He couldnt have been more right, suddenly I had a C average and my sister that has always been rewarded for working and studying is doing great; I was really stuck on a fixed mindset of the less I try for the results others had to work hard for the smarter I am. And it took me all the way to senior year to see that I had nothing special to show colleges, nothing that made me stand out sure I had clubs and community service but what was all that worth when I had bad grades.

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I was now in my final years of high school. In past years I was not an advanced student but not remedial, I felt lost in between the numbers. Teacher and class rooms were so dull. Even students in the remedial classes try harder so that they can get out of those classes but here I felt like there was no way out of the middle. Teachers didnt want to teach students just wanted a C. Howard Gardner says we devoted attention to the special population, like prodigies, idiot savants, autistic children and children with learning disabilities these children where important because they meet the profile with a jagged edge (Gardner 109) Most people fail to see the importance of the majority. Thats were i felt like I was in high school like my education was a really cookie cutter experience. Counselors didnt care much were our empty goals we set and as soon as we are out of high school we are not their problem anymore. For some people like Johnny Santiago Baca being in that middle would have been a luxury. He spends several days in solitary confinement because he was not allowed to get his GED while he was in prison that how much this meant to him. He loved to read and write and if he was able to educate himself that would be his rebirth. . I realized that I need to be the one that got myself out of this purgatory I had to swim out of a place with no place to lean on to take a step, I enrolled in 2 AP classes and they were the best classes that I had ever taken they were filled with the nerds that soon became my friends it felt nice to be in a zone where everyone was trying to go to college and out work eachother.to hear them form study groups not for coping homework. Ms. Johnston was really a fire work of excitement and knowledge. She had tutoring every single day even though only two people would go for studying and 6 would be there just to talk to her. She would rather speak to her student than her friends and other teachers, her boyfriend knew how much she cared about us because she would make him stay sometimes until all the kids left. She would just make u feel like you can learn anything as long as you spend a little extra time. She was my favorite

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teacher teaching my favorite subject, like a boss. Im glad I got to meet her so I know that I can make a change in the way I perceive my education, if she taught me anything, it would be that I get what I put into my education. Like Baca I did a form of self-transformation. Regret is a type of fixed mind set, I dont have regrets just learning experiences. I welcome my past and try to learn from it I come from a high school that was a 92%of the population was Latino. Which I believed at the time must be Mexican and some Salvadorians. Now I see that it was raza from all over the Latin America sharing my roots. But we all spoke English to each other even in Spanish class never did I think to wonder why. We spoke the dominant language we wanted to find common ground and didnt want show how Chicano we are. Our white washed Spanglish had marked who we are yet we still hid it from one another yet when we meet white people the first thing they want to do is hear is speak Spanish and want to know if we have ever been to Mexico and ask how it was. The more we fight for social equality the more of our culture we lose. I believe that we should fight for social justice so that we are all equal in the court of law but understand that we are different and would still like to keep our customs. In this class aside from free writing, which I think is both a good way to develop voice and just vent some time when I know that I am not sharing, I want to learn more about my culture. I really feel segregated even from my own people. We live in an age where two Mexicans cannot see each other in the street and say hola if they are under 30. I see Latinos not only being white washed but I see them denouncing their roots. Myself included I hear myself making fun of our over ability to find a reason for celebration for any occasion and our world recognized foods. I want to learn more of the culture not of the Americans or Mexico because I am neither. I am Chicano.

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You now see how our Chicano American educational experiences are similar. We all experience good and bad learning experiences, and have expectations for our education. Education is what we make of it and is only as valuable as we decide it is. If you want a quality education and havent been so fortunate then make your own fortune go out and work hard show people that you want it, many people will help.